#in other news: local angels emotionally turbulent at all times give them some therapy for the love of god

[edens-notesfromthegarden]

gabriel/zadkiel || angst w/ no comfort (823 words)

he looked exhausted.

that was one of the first things zadkiel noticed during their reunion. gabriel didn't exude the energy he used to. he flew less, he fought with less brilliance, and for the life of them zadkiel couldn't begin to think why. they feared it was a sensitive subject, and so they never brought it up.

but they could no longer sit idly, having it seen it persist for months now. in the quiet of their shared bedroom, both angels sat on the bed, looking at each other quietly. thunder loomed outside in gentle booms.

"so... can i ask about that?"

"about... what?" gabriel asked, confused.

zadkiel sighed. "you look so tired. drained. what happened?"

"you mean you don't know?"

zadkiel fell silent as gabriel looked away. "they... the council, they punished me for my failure in defeating v1 the first time we fought." his fist clenched tightly. "they stripped me of my light. i no longer have the strength or power i did before."

"your light?"

gabriel looked back at zadkiel. they both looked equally confused at each other's statements.

"what do you mean?" gabriel asked. "our light? the thing that connects us to Him? that grants us our power?"

something seemed to click in zadkiel's mind. mortification twisted on their features. "gabriel, what are you talking about? that was never a thing."

gabriel fell quiet, but the golden shift in his eyes spoke plenty.

"gabriel..." zadkiel's voice is gentle as they take his hand in theirs. "gabriel, who talked about the light?"

nothing in response. the yellow glowed stronger. zadkiel's were beginning to reflect the same emotion.

"it was the council, wasn't it?"

they felt his body shake and the hand holding theirs grow tighter.

"... oh god, what did they do to you?"

gabriel teared himself away, standing up from the bed abruptly. tears fell from molten gold eyes, curling past gritted teeth. his fists were clenched, and his chest rose and fell heavily as fury roared in his heart.

yet another lie from the council. and this one finally broke him.

"i can't do this, i—"

without another word, he began to storm out the door. zadkiel was fast to react, scrambling off the bed and grabbing his hand once more.

"gabriel, what are you doing?" zadkiel asked, eyes welling with tears of his own.

"you were right yet again, zadkiel!" gabriel snapped, tugging his arm out of zadkiel's hold as he does. "you proved once again how gullible my faith made me!"

zadkiel frowned, hands lowering. "what the fuck are you talking about, i was just concerned—"

"you've once again shown me how weak i am!" he let out a hateful laugh, "how easily i was made a puppet because i at least cared about the father!"

"woah, woah, what the fuck are you getting at?" zadkiel took a step forward, wings spreading behind him in a matching golden glow. "all i did was make you realise another shitty thing the council did, why are you—"

"oh thank you, zadkiel! let me grovel at your feet for freeing such a pitful angel as i from more invisible shackles! you're so high and mighty all the time, oh so wise for deciding to abandon heaven while we all suffered, i bet you feel so great in being sooo right!"

zadkiel couldn't believe his ears. more tears fell from his eyes. his staff was in his hands and pointed at gabriel before he even realised it.

"do you even fucking hear yourself right now?" they cried. "all i fucking did was ask if you're okay and now you're insulting me? christ, gabriel, its a wonder why people like you, you're so fucking insufferable when the things you know are challenged!"

"and you think you're any different?" he scoffed. "oh wait, of course you do! you have such an inferiority complex you have to bring everyone here down to your level to feel better about yours—"

it takes a second to register the sudden pain in his side. dizzy, he fell to a knee whilst clutching his hip. it was warm. there was blood. both on his hands and now on zadkiel's staff, that shook violently in the small angel's hands.

neither of them knew what they were doing now.

"god, i— gabriel, i'm so sorry, i—"

gabriel stood up with a grunt, still clutching his side, and began to stagger off.

"i need— i need time to think... i'm sorry, zadkiel."

zadkiel had no chance to speak further as a golden light illuminated the hallway, taking gabriel with it as it disappeared. the staff slipped from zadkiel's hand, clattering onto the floor with a loud clang. their voice was gone, tired and spent and choked up on tears, they couldn't even muster a cry.

they simply turned back around and walked back into the bedroom, leaving their staff behind. all they wanted to do now was rest the day away.

#eden.docx #ultrakill #ultrakill gabriel #i have opinions and feelings about the light #i know its probably a physical thing but is there not something so pained about realising something you fought to keep never existed at all #just another means of control by the council #in other news: local angels emotionally turbulent at all times give them some therapy for the love of god