#in order to preserve myself i felt the need to separate myself from every flaw (or 'flaw') i have | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

obsidianarchives · 5 years

Text

Exploring Slytherin House from a Black Historical Lens

As a weird, goth-punk, nerdy, queer Black girl growing up in the projects, I always held a certain type of anger. I adored Black history and developed a keen sense of the socio-political challenges our communities faced. I also embraced dark subcultural elements, like darkwave and punk, an avenue where ‘darkness’ played out in the Eurocentric sense, and thus became a part of rebellion with white kids. Anything dark would resemble rebellion — Blackness included. This caused me to become isolated and a bit resentful towards the outer world.

My tastes for ‘darkness’ extended to the Harry Potter universe. My personal obsession with Slytherin House is odd since they have been considered to be the ‘neo-Nazis of the Wizarding World.’ I attribute this good vs. evil paradigm to Rowling’s cultural methodology of character building. But the characteristics of Slytherin shouldn’t be considered bad. The idea of having your community’s best interests at heart and living without fear from potentially antagonistic forces should be a wonderful message to marginalized individuals. However, in the Harry Potter series, it plays out with questionable character attributes that tend to be polarizing.

Zora Neale Hurston — folklorist, anthropologist, author, and all-around bad-ass — grew up in a small Black town in Florida. This autonomous Black community cemented her belief that Black people did not need integration in order to gain equality. She believed that the means of our freedom was in our own communities and that to allow whiteness within it would undermine our efforts. The spirit of the Black community could only be maintained if we were given the space to govern ourselves, unapologetically. For me, Zora and her views are very Slytherin.

"Or perhaps in Slytherin, You'll make your real friends, These cunning folks use any means To achieve their ends." -- The Sorting Hat, Sorcerer’s Stone

When Salazar Slytherin helped create Hogwarts, he was mistrustful of Muggle-born students because of tensions between the Muggle world (which at the time was considered dangerous and a threat to magical people) and the Wizarding World (which he felt needed to be protected from that very threat). He wanted the magical community to live separate from the Muggles and Muggle-borns.

Slytherin House is modeled by the philosophy of ‘being the best.’ It’s members are often viewed as isolationist. Cunning, hardworking, logical, and a traditionalist, Salazar wanted his students to solve obstacles in their lives with apt strategy. Despite this knack for self-sufficiency and collective transgenerational preservation, they are criminalized. Sound familiar?

Similarly, Malcolm X advocated for Black people to defend themselves from the racism and prejudice they faced. "I don't call it violence when it's self-defense. I call it intelligence." Malcolm was a controversial figure in his day, often seeming to butt heads with Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr. and other Civil Rights leaders for his more separationist and headstrong views that eschewed Black integration into white society.

"We declare our right on this earth to be a man, to be a human being, to be respected as a human being, to be given the rights of a human being in this society, on this earth, in this day, which we intend to bring into existence by any means necessary." -- Malcolm X, Organization of Afro-American Unity founding rally on June 28, 1964

Even Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr. came to some elements of this Slytherin philosophy. Several years after the “I have a dream” speech, King is reported as saying, “I fear I am integrating my people into a burning house.” He suggested that perhaps it was not as simple to imagine equality only by the acceptance of race. He ultimately came to the conclusion that the answer to his “dream” was a bit more complex, that integration wasn’t the end of the fight.

Likewise to these real life schools of thought, Salazar thought that integrating Muggle-borns into the magical community wasn’t as simple as Gryffindor wanted it to be. Salazar took his “means” too far in the direction of prompting genocide, but the parallels are there.

As with Black people through history, Slytherins have internalized adaptability, intuition, and a resistance towards those who misunderstand them. Slytherins can come off as being cold or callous, but their ability to possess duality makes them quite unpredictable. This could read as the very real struggle of the Black individual groomed into the idea of assimilation, only to be tokenized and regarded as a ‘token of Eurocentrism’ to the masses or be forced to hide their true nature, while facing systematic disadvantages.

The fatal flaw of the analogy of racism in Harry Potter is that the Wizarding World is colorblind. Anti-Blackness is a rhetoric not explored in Rowling’s world. So comparing Black history to Rowling’s incomplete metaphor was more about me finding myself in Slytherin House when the rest of the Wizarding World didn’t look like me.

Every day, those like myself who live on the fringe are told to ‘change’ and to accept a society that has been intent on killing us. Slytherin House taught me that we should live our lives unapologetically, without fear — by any means necessary.

Monika Estrella Negra is a queer, Black punk/goth hybrid of mystery. Her first short titled "Flesh" is about a Black femme serial killer navigating the Chicago DIY punk scene (of which was included in the ‘Horror Noire’ syllabus). She has directed three additional shorts, ‘They Will Know You By Your Fruit’, ‘Succubus’, and the in production ‘Bitten, A Tragedy’. A writer, a nomadic priestess, spiritual gangster and all around rabblerouser - Monika has written essays for Black Girl Nerds, Grimm Magazine, is the author of a zine series (Tales From My Crypt), the creator of Audre's Revenge Film and Black and Brown Punk Show Chicago, a 2018 Leeway Foundation Art and Change Grantee, and is aspiring to become a Meme Lord. Hailing from the Midwest, she now resides in Philadelphia, focusing on completing her Vengeance Anthology.

#The Critical Companion #Harry Potter

1 note · View note

hippyspacewitch · 6 years

Text

This has been building up for a while and this recent “bible” argument really bothers me. I can’t and won’t stay quiet about this. This is pungent with Fox News and the extreme Republican views. How can you not feel for people. It is genuinely upsetting and heart breaking. Those who stand on the side of coldness and disregard for life. You’re beyond despicable. There just aren’t words powerful enough to describe how much. Hypocritical. Sickening. These are words we could rightfully use to set the tone for an administration that strongly advocates putting children into concentration camps, separating families, while at the same time declaring it always necessary to follow through with every pregnancy. How cruel and lacking self awareness can you be? No, this is done in order to keep people down, and maintain control. Willful ignorance evolves into ultimate evil again.

I am not a sadness seeking person. I’m not the misery chick. Coming off a good high, actually. I’m living my life, feeling good. Aren’t I a lucky duck. Sweat is smelly, but it feels so good to get out of my skin for a bit. Looking more fit, take a pic, feeling happy. Whelp, let’s take a little trip to yon’ internet, gonna post another selfie of my cute face, look at those dimples! Wait, I’m not looking at my dimples anymore.

Looking at what’s going on in the world instead, so I continue reading NEWS, which is based on FACTS. I know. REALLY crazy to hear. Hopefully that catches on one day. Regardless, I am incredibly saddened. Only wish to repost the unpleasant articles I read, hoping it helps create awareness. It doesn’t feel like an appropriate time for sharing pleasantries or my happiness, because I’m truly very upset with the direction this current regime is leading our nation.

We weren’t too far from that standard already, but snowflakes are pushing back hard, trying to double down on ending crucial necessities needed to maintain a semi-capable, albeit heavily flawed, semi-civilized society. So many people have died to protect the right just to exist with dignity, relative to that previously stated fact alone, as it pertains mainly to the elongated fight for basic human rights. People of all races and cultural backgrounds have died for that much. I’m wholeheartedly dissatisfied and sickened by the actions of not just the notorious current administration, but the White House too, along with those who see the overall standard of humanity that so many people hold, as anything short of unacceptable. If you accept this, you should feel ashamed. I can’t say that enough, if you don’t hear your momma’s voice. If you continue to follow me, I’ll make sure you hear my voice enough.

I’ll make you feel something, whether you just stop reading because you can’t handle the truth, or if you’re feeling froggy, ready to speak against me, (I’ll weed y’all out.) or hey, you evolve at least far enough to want to see the world be better someday. (Work toward the latter.)

Therefore I am strongly urging and pleading with COGNITIVELY DISSONANT WHITE PEOPLE out there. It is long past time you MAKE A CHANGE, concerning the way you think about racism and race. SPECIFICALLY ADDRESSING people of PRIVILEGE here, anyone born into the Christian faith, not specific enough, here - WHITE PEOPLE! Yes, I am one, and I even fit all that above criteria. Well look at that. I can speak for myself and therefore others like me. Coming from a place where I was misdiagnosed AMAB (that’s assigned male at birth) I can absolutely say it is EASY for me to recognize the first 27 years of my life I was living with the highest standard of privilege in the United States. I still live with privilege as a white person, even as a transgender woman.

Anyone who knows me well enough, might say, “Well, Eris you’ve described what it’s like to live in an impoverished area, with high levels of crime, gang violence, and from what you tell me, you had reason to be afraid. That doesn’t sound like privilege” To which I would respond to myself as someone else, for the purposes of making a point in this hypothetical scenario that fits my point in the end, “Self that isn’t myself, because I’m not an idiot. We see comment sections for days, with white people fired up, wanting so bad to let the world know from their brand new iPhone, they experienced some semblance of living within poverty. White people essentially bragging about having a cup of coffee in the ghetto. It’s either that, or meth head white people living in a meth head white people neighborhood. Fox News’ most loyal demographic. White people who take unemployment, have tons of babies, vote Republican, damn liberals out there who are fighting to keep them off the street, with extremely limited resources given. Some viewers don’t know the definition of ironic, but isn’t it ironic? Ignorance isn’t at all self aware, until you spell it out for them slowly, and then there’s a chance they briefly acknowledge it before turning away, and forgetting it happened entirely. That said we must strive to look further than our individual experience for lessons.”

I heard that hot garbage living in Washington. Surrounded by meth heads. Working at the gas station, you here people talk. False arguments straight from hypocritical, entitled white people who are just looking to close the gap and get even more. So many of them are far too shameless, they’ll just admit it themselves. Who else are they going to tell? I can’t make this up. People who think like this are naturally afraid, as you should be. Fear clouds our minds far too often, but white people like this are next level.

Pissed off they have to share, like an overgrown petulant brat, ready to lick whatever unseen, promised hints of scum off a criminal inheritors shitty ass boot, as long as they feel like that boot isn’t treading on them. I’m not at all going to even get into my experience living in a bad neighborhood, here. I won’t even get into how long either. I can tell you, it was bad enough for me to want to know why. Now, I know why, and it’s more important to know. Privilege white politicians redistricting people based on race.

If you’re at all uncomfortable hearing white people, think how other people must be feeling about the whole sociology of race and everyday human relations. Oh I’m sorry, you can’t know, and neither can I. White people contribute to poverty maintaining class and privilege, institutionalizing racism through laws they create with that specific intention. Now they want to shut immigrants out entirely. The rich are a head of the curve in terms of closing the gap. Not out of strictly self preservation, the real goal is to maintain constant control and domination, basically keep people of color down.

This is barely getting close to just scratching the surface about race. A subject, I actually don’t like speaking a whole lot about. I don’t feel like I’m appropriate representation, for one thing. Personally, more of a reader on the subject. I will explain my experience learning about racism. It was fairly early on. I didn’t learn it, because of the area I lived in. The area I lived in was small, bad areas are small or larger depending on the states race issues and redistricting. I learned it before I moved there actually. There’s no way to put this without causing discomfort, so I apologize.

My biological donor called my former step dad the n word constantly. I actually asked him about it. I was very young, so I only remember my stepdad at the time, explaining certain things in a very delicate way, mostly to not harm my innocence. Saying he doesn’t actually feel like he’s a racist, that he’s just mad. It was hard on my mom and step dad to struggle with not wanting to shatter the image of my biological father, versus him basically doing it to himself. Being an empath, I recognized it was difficult, eventually I was calling them out on it. That doesn’t really have much to do with where I’m going, it’s just a bit of background to my mind altering experience as it pertains to learning about race.

Once I was older, around fifth or sixth grade, a few people would target me at school, because I’m white. It wasn’t until we got older, for the last couple years before I moved. I used to just be frustrated that we couldn’t keep seeing past it. I had yet to discover why that thought is selfish, but I was a good hearted kid. I thought it wasn’t fair, remembering how I felt, as it pertains to expecting people to learn English. How many extra languages are you fluent in, again. It isn’t easy for most people to casually pick up another language.

It’s important to realize, I’d been taught discrimination is wrong. I was taught not to blame other people for my problem. Once again, more learned behavior. My whole point is coming into fruition soon. Yes, I was discriminated against for being a white person. There it is, did you catch it? You might only be able to imagine why people of color would discriminate against white people; if you watch bullshit news and drink hot garbage for tea, wake up and smell the coffee!

If you are not lacking in awareness, you don’t have to look very far to see racism for what it is, and know the difference between perceived racism (discrimination) and racism as a contributing factor in our society. A real problem that effects people of color in so many complex ways, I truly can’t comprehend. It’s hard enough being trans and dealing with people hating you, before they know you at all. That’s one instance I can peel back in a big old nasty onion with many layers. Another privilege for white people, along with ignoring it, as far I am concerned it’s absolutely willful ignorance.

Deflate this desperate flotation mechanism and aesthetics. I hope this at least brings people the shame and guilt too many people are tired of feeling and want to just move past. Check yourself white people, you have no idea what it’s like to struggle daily as a disenfranchised person of color. You might have problems, but your privilege confines your experience.

3 notes · View notes

cherylmaebasanalh1a · 4 years

Text

NAME: CHERYL MAE BASANAL

SECTION: H1A-BSED MAJOR IN ENGLISH

SUBJECT: UNDERSTANDING THE SELF

SUBMITTED TO: MR. RAUL DADIS JR.

Chapter One (1)

The Self of Concept from Various Philosophical Perspectives

MY REFLECTION

Fear of failure. That was my biggest anxiety that I may not be able to fight with. It brings so much of pain every time it gets into my nerves. It made me hopeless every time it did not meet my expectations. I was terrified to encounter exertions and mostly the hardest battle ahead. I was not prepared to wear all my gears and shield to protect my emotions and accept the things that are not meant for me. I was weak and naked. Fightened to be left behind. So i decided to stay in my comfort zone–to be alone.

It was all started at my 7th to 10th grade when I experienced many things including academic failures and even friendship. Since then, I have joined countless organizations and programs including pageants and amateur contests that I thought it would be effective with regards on my performances at school but it was not. It serves many trials and errors that challenges my strenghts. I met a lot of people that I thought they would be true to me, that there is someone to cry on, to bond with, to feel that somewhat I have someone to be with along my journey. But yes, literally no one. It hurts me a lot that even I gave my all, my effort, time but all of it was not enough. It made me think that I am truly a failure. A useless. But I realise that I have God. I knew that during my difficult situations, the time that I suffered, He was there for me and I felt like I am connected to him. That I am no longer left alone.

"Unexamined life is not worth living", according to Socrates. I learned that it is okay not to be okay. It is alright to feel pain, to feel alone and being left. It is alright to fail. Explore many things and enjoy what life given us. I learned that as the time goes by, life is more challenging. As it gets more challenging the more I will fight for it and prove that I can do it no matter what to reach my aspirations in life. Even I weighed down by scars and disappointments, I have my self with a strong belief–all geared with shield and ready to accept failures.

Chapter Two (2)

Sociological Perspective: The self as a Product of Society

MY REFLECTION

How can a person defines their selves? How did they view themselves as a living individual in a society? Do we have any movement that can make our society to be in a constant development? In the accordance of Charles Horton Cooley's "Looking glass self", I view myself as one of the population that can make our society grow its development to provide the necessities of the people in need.

It is somewhat self awareness and inner mirror where it can help us to be in the right path where we can decide what are the things that properly shapes ourselves as an individual living. I believe that the self is the person as the object lf its own reflective consciousness. It is a good method for us to soar beyond our journey together with society for the reason that I am a product of it. I have plenty of responsibilities in different aspects in the society. It is also a part of my growth since it helps me and I learn from it on how to interact with the people that surrounds me. I believe that no society and it will never acts independently without the existence of human being. I may not be the most powerful person living but in the sense of making the society in a better state.

I would be the one to raise a change where we cannot find cruelty, corruption, chaos and criminality. Brings equality, possible to live in harmony and no violence. I view myself as one of the population that can improve the development and growth of our own society and the preservation of culture so that everyone is living under a peaceful and chaos-free world.

Chapter Three (3)

An Anthropological Conceptualization of Self: The Self As Embedded in Culture

MY REFLECTION

"Culture is both meaning and the process of making meaning". All the human beings exist and live in their cultures. Humans create and modify their cultures, and in turn cultures define the context where the humans are. No one can live without any culture, that’s why they create them and are suspended in them. According to the Social Learning theory that an individual can acquire learning through observation and imitation since behavior could be determined by environment and culture. Being raised by my family's culture really shaped my development and my self concept which leads me to a wide perception on viewing how I interact to others.

Respect. My parents never wasted their effort on teaching us on how to be polite and to be a prestigious person. From that, I learned that I have to accept somebody for who they are, even we are in different paces or even I am not agree with them. Despite of having a different cultures and beliefs, respect should be remain on top. Respect shapes you as an individual and it reflects your whole as a person. I do have some muslim friends before and we used to hang out or eat outdoor knowing our social norms. We are aware what are the things that is right and wrong, appropriate and not. Having this kind of personality brings a good impact on you as a citizen.

By knowing our own culture is that we are better able to understand the others. With the great amount of diversity, we are still respecting and accept each other's belief and culture. Geertz emphasisizes that human nature is interdependent with culture; without men, no culture, certainly, but equally and more significantly, without culture, no men. The lives of a person has a meaning, if they perceived that meaning into experiences, then they run into the same culture. In more ways, culture influences us than we may know. Being interacted to one another in one place, serves as an invisible bond that ties a community together with no culture. Hence, self as embedded in culture.

Chapter Four (4)

Psychological Perspective of the Self

MY REFLECTION

Human beings are always striving for self fullfillment or self-actualization. Many people are still fulfilling and yet on-job on their duties that they are capable with. In order to fulfill one's self actualization, the person must follow the eight (8) behaviors that argued by Maslow that can lead to self actualization. Be present, be aware of your choices, get to know yourself, Be honest, do not worry about conformity, self actualize continiously, recognize peak experiences and lastly be prepared to deal with psycopathology. The fulfillment of self undersgoes pain and hardships. Maslow suggested that if the psychoanalytic literature has taught us nothing else, it has taught us that repression is not a good way of solving problems.

As human beings, we have basic psychological needs for personal growth and development throughout our lives. by accomplishing self actualization, you are able to find meaning and purpose in your life and able to say you are truly lived. I am a musician and a member of choral in Davao City National High School where I was graduated. I used to make songs, cover songs and performed in different places even I never made a profit on it. In my inner side, it makes me fulfilled and glad with those minuscule snap of achievements. Self-understanding is one of the most important to adolescents to acquire fulfillment and to linger to their aspirations or who they wanted to be. In some ways, commemorating minimal achievement can make us more inspired to look for more and huge suprises given by life.

In the end of my understanding with regards on this chapter, being aware of the needs of your self is way more important for us to figure out what makes us to be a better person. When the needs of the self are denied, severe andiety may arise. We have to know what are the necessary things in ourselves to make a better fulfillment and to acquire learnings throughout the journey in finding the meaning of our life.

Chapter Five (5)

Western and Eastern Concept of the Self

MY REFLECTION

In western self, it involves to some extent a dimension of “thingness,” the reification of a homunculus assumed to reside within the individual, who is the thinker of thoughts, the doer of deeds, and the feeler of feelings and about eastern, the self is often treated as an illusion. That is, the idea that people are separate entities from each other and the world is not considered a reality in Eastern thought. Whereas in the West the self is understood primarily as an autonomous ego whose existence is distinct from that of others, in the East, it is often argued there is no meaning of self that is independent of our relations to others.

Both perspectives have different meanings and purposes. People have different practices and beliefs whereas people are separated base on what they used to believe and base on their culture that embodied to their personalities. I belong to monotheistic western religion where I believe and worshipped to only one God. This gives people something to believe in, provides a sense of structure and typically offers a group of people to connect with over similar beliefs. These facets can have a large positive impact on mental health—research suggests that religiosity reduces suicide rates, alcoholism and drug use.

To end this chapter, having different aspects of beliefs and belongings does not going to be a basis and does not affect of being a person living. The important thing there is having a different cultures, religion or even way of thinking, there must always be a solid interaction to one another and understanding or respecting each other's belief and belongings. The identity and self-concept of an individual is interwoven with the identity and status of his/her community or culture, sharing its prides as well as its failures. In the end, self Cultivation is the ultimate purpose of life.

Chapter Six (6)

The Physical Self

MY REFLECTION

I grew up with a spirit of Inquisition. It is quite uneasy for me to discover the changes that occurs in my body as I reach my adolesence stage. I knew that during those days, I am no longer a kid. I reach the stage where my responsibility as a women intensifies. But sometimes as I look my self in the mirror, I can see how flawed I am. Far from being perfect. I cannot deny from time to time, I do have a huge insecurities with my overall body image. That it gives me an idea that if I would be like others–good looking and mostly has everything, I would be optimistic and relieved.

Living in a simple life is not nerve-racking. We do not own luxury and expensive things. It does not make me feel worried and anxious about the things we had. What makes me feel more insecure is that seeing someone without any problem or body issues. I have an ectomorphic body structure. Even I eat a lot, sometimes it does not make me feel healthy. I am sensitive and fragile being. I do easily get hurt and feel unworthy. I used to compare my entire being on others. I have low self-esteem which I lack confidence and strong voice. I cannot stand on my own and defend myself towards the other. I felt bad about asking for something or more that can possibly fills up my satisfactions and needs that must be present in my whole body structure.

Nevertheless, I keep on reminding myself on how beautiful and captivating I am. Sometimes, we dont have to depend on what other's point of view or standard on how they define what beauty is. It is important to see our worth, see things in a positive way and a good heart because true beauty brings innumerable rewards. It aligns you with your true nature and creator and soothes the soul that makes a person happy. I believe that the best and most beautiful things in the world cannot be seen or even touched–they must be felt with the heart.

Chapter Seven (7)

The Sexual Self

MY REFLECTION

Raising awareness and learn how important sexual orientation and information about sexual and reproductive health and rights among the youth is the best method or action to prevent the spreading of deseases and early pregnancy. It is the timely issues that is hard to decrease since the number of deseases that is continuously spreading and number of teenagers getting pregnant has its high percentage. I was born and raised in a community that is mostly teenage pregnancy are very common. As a future educator, I will lead my way to stop this common problem by educating our future suitors.

I can see how hard to fight life when you are not ready for it. One of my relative is a teen age mother. It gives a sorrowful feeling seeing that they really suffered the situation. They were not ready even they dont know where to get some source of income to provide the needs of their family. Seeing that she really need to quit her studies to fucos on their responsibilities as a parents. Sadly seeing that they encounter judgements, depression and disappointments on their parents specially they expect too much and they did everything to make her future better. It was all summed up to their problem to fight with. Several adversities such as social stigma, lack of emotional support, poor healthcare access, and stresses around new life adjustments that parenting adolescents may faced with.

Life is a choice. We made mistakes and deal with the consequences. They knew and already learned their lesson in life. Sometimes dealing with circumstances, we dont have assurance on it and we suddenly drively give in. It is important to know the possibility in every decision before we take the risk since we cannot go backwards. Enough with beyond doubt knowledge is important. My goal is to raise my voice to prevent this issue in order for us to be in a conflict-free living.

Chapter Eight (8)

The Material Self

MY REFLECTION

"A simple and unassuming manner of life is best for everyone, best for both body and mind", accoring to Albert Einstein. Living a simple lifestyle allows us to see the reality of the situation more easily. We are like living in a less stressed for the reason that it has less to worry about. It is easier to make a wise decision when we know our principles in life. But sometimes we tend to ask for something that is we also want to feel on having things that we never used to have. I do experienced being possessed by material things as a result of being insecured on things that I wanted to have also.

Material possessions remain valuable because this possessions are symbolic of one's social status. Since people tend to see a person's status base on the things that he/she are able to buy, it serves as an ideal standard of the whole society. As I remembered when I am on my 11th grade, I was the one together with my colleagues that is being chosen to lead in making a thesis paper. Everyone of them has its own resources–laptop and even internet connection and I was the only one who does not have it all. Since I cannot provide my own and cannot even do something on it, I was kicked out the group. This made me feel like people will treat you good if you have stuffs like them or we can say the greater the material possessions, the more likely one will be regarded and accepted by the other people. Which sometimes, I also wanted those things to be treated well and better.

Besides, a simple life is not filled with complications and distractions. It is a life that is lived focused on so that we feel comfortable and contented. It is too unhealthy to ask something or you are trying to find satisfactions. We have to learn being gratified and appreciate things we owned instead of looking for something we cannot have. I learned to say no to unnecessary spending and live my life based on my standards and not the expectations of other people.

Chapter Nine (9)

The Spiritual Self

MY REFLECTION

I kept on asking myself that what is my purpose of living? Do I really have to search the meaning of my existence? Intermittently, finding the meaning of life or understanding the nature of my personal existence, too feel my significance and purposefulness is kinda difficult or unattainable for me. Even before, I do not understand why I suffered a lot. Why do I have to make an effort on everything. It is something that there's one thing I dont have and lack of.

Faith. It took a long period of time to be fully aware and perceived that I should talk and confess to Him everything. That if I give up to Him my struggles and weaknesses or ask for guidance, it will strengthen my relationship to Him. Made me feel so bad that sometimes I doubted Him. Doubted Him for so many reasons–misunderstandings, personality, family conflicts and tragic circumstances that I felt so alone facing those trials. I grew up in a christian family, even my relatives are regular worshippers. We go to church every sunday and I used to sing psalms. Leaving then, I never felt that I am completely connected to Him. I was covered by curiosities seeing that how can people felt that He is with them? How did they know that He exist? Why that sometimes He never cares about me? They said that I should change my perspectives and believe that there is the Almighty One. How can I change it? Does it really need to go to church to be a better person?

I can't see Him but He give me signs. I can't see Him but now, I can feel Him. Knowing that, it doesn't need to show people that you're a church-goer. It has to be like you know that you believe and you will be faithful to Him. I realise that the spirit on us gives us a physical space to connect and draw closer to God and to realise that there is something out there bigger than ourselves. It instantly elevated to a state where like it opens my mind and our heart widely to Him and trying to understand more his message. He put me on this state to give me assignments whereas trials and pain are present. He made me realize that I have a purpose and challenged me on things to reach my accomplishments. And now, I never doubted Him anymore.

Chapter Ten (10)

The Political Self

MY REFLECTION

Being an active citizen in a country is also what we called political self. Individuals are already political by nature. Since, identity is one of the important components of political self, It is a representation about how a person defines or how they perceived his/herself. This is a public identity also has an impact with the construction of a person's desire or aspirations. The idea of Social Learning theory where an individual can acquire knowledge through observation and imitation since behavior could be determined by environment, an individual's learning comes from the environment he/she had may affect their desires or who they wanted to be.

The family has a hierarchical structure which requires each member to perform his/her role. My parents are fastidious in many things where they must be followed on what they wanted us to be. They wanted me to take a nursing course instead of taking education. It is the most difficult decision on me that I have to be disobedient this time. I think, taking the course that may not fit your desires and skills, studying will be a burden. It is very complicated to imagine that the correlation between salary and job satisfaction is weak. This may not be effective on me and I will never enjoy it. Since teaching made me feel as a whole person, that I know that I can help individual who are in need–better understanding and good interaction, well I will fight for it.

In order to enhance the knowledge and contentment at the individual level and bringing development for the common good of the society at large, political participation is the essential way since it is considered as an important component for development constructively. As a member of the developing society and a future educator, I will use my voice in order to commit the effectiveness of the decision making process where it can help the better growth of the nation and the better and constant lives of future suitors.

Chapter Eleven (11)

The Digital Self

MY REFLECTION

The digital self is the aspect of the self that expressed or shared to others through online interaction. The digital and technology is absolutely essential and vital in our daily lives. It is more relied on since it serves as a helping hand to a huge number of people as it provide jobs and creat new ways of communication specially we are under the pandemic. It helps us to be updated and aware on daily updates. Living on this modern-high tech world, it became as inseparable object that shows advantages and disadvantages by its usage especially how it affects to the young and substance abusers.

Adolescents are particularly susceptible to cyberbullying, gossips and stalking. Highlighting this issue wakes up the mind to young purchasers on how to properly behave in using social media platforms. I have been bullied through online and suffered phycological distress. Being laughed and judged by different anonymous person on media gives huge impact on me including it lowers my self-esteem and made me so strained emotionally. This causes too much factors such as it loses interest on interacting with people, in studies and even increases anxiety that could lead to suicidal thoughts. It is so important to give an action on this to decrease the large number of victims.

Malik, et. al (2017) suggest that technology–mobile phones are ever more becoming a very valuable part of people's daily lives. It allows the users to keep in touch and stay connected in people technically and be aware on things. Hence, this would be the best platform to spread awareness on youth on how to use technology in a proper way. This would be the best method to educate peers to lessen the number of Cyberbullying and also parents to monitor and guide their children including the advices which is necessary for preventing the never ending cycle of aggression. This action is the best way to avoid risks not just ourselves but the whole safety of adolescents living on the spherical world.

*********

In drawing things to my closing proclamation, I learned that all the things undergoes a long process. I conclude that everything can be possible if you believe in yourself. You have to understand the inner you and find the purpose of your existence and be a good example to society. I learned that without my effort and failures, I am not who I am right now. Sometimes, life is not fair. But life challenged us to be strong enough to fight travails ahead. Along with my journey, I never lose my faith to Him. My family are there to support and cheer me up. Yes, even if you have everything but doing things without misery and pain, you will never felt the true feeling of success.

"Our success does not depend on what we have, but on what we do with what we have"

-Raul Dadis

0 notes