#in 2009 and 2010 i was in the livejournal reboot trek fandom. and it really was so much fun

[simptasia]

i can think about and look at anton yelchin without being in pain now

#only took about 6 and half years #yeah anton's death really hit me hard #there was a time i just. could not look at him. or think about him. like i'd tear up and it'd hurt too much #i think it woulda helped if i rewatched stuff with him in it sooner. but instead i avoided him. oh well #i'm alright now. recently i've watching video essays about reboot trek #and also i watched some ''watching for the first time'' vids about 'em too #and all that has reminded me that oh right. i like reboot trek #in 2009 and 2010 i was in the livejournal reboot trek fandom. and it really was so much fun #and that carried over to my early days on tumblr #ah good times #and chekov was always my favourite <3 baby. baby boy #anyways star trek 2009 and star trek beyond are good movies y'all #star trek into darkness........... exists. badly #also i cannot stress enough how great zachary quinto is in these movies. thats a good fucking spock right there

[king0fcrows]

I am SHAKING right now because I’ve had WAAAAAY to much coffee and

I just saw a post about Generator Rex on my dash and here’s the thing:

I had completely forgotten it existed.

I LOVED that show. It was legit one of my first real fandoms? HOW did I entirely fucking forget about it? I literally cannot even remember anything about the show right now except that I was constantly lusting over Agent Six?

And when I went back to look at my fandom timeline on my old archived tumblrs, I also was reminded that I was into Ben 10. Not quite to the degree I was into Gen Rex but enough that I remember reading obsessive!darkfic of Kevin/Gwen back on DeviantArt BEFORE Ben 10 made him into a good guy in Ben Ten: Alien Force.

(Yes, I have apparently always liked creepy ships--even in early adolescence.)

Ben 10 started when I was pretty young, to the point I was watching with intrigue whenever I saw it on cartoon network but not YET able to keep track of a schedule well enough to not miss episodes.

But by the time Ben 10 Alien Force hit?

Oh FUCK yeah--my ability to actually follow fandoms developed!

So my fandom timeline looks like this:

Fanfic.net and DeviantArt accounts started in 2007. I was liking futzing around on these sites a few weeks/months before breaking down and making accounts. I distinctly remember Quizilla being somewhere in there as well. This was right as I ended middle school/started high school and really started getting into fandom as a regular hobby. Main fandoms were Harry Potter, Naruto, Bleach. 

I discovered Livejournal a year or two later and sadly made an account in 2009 right as the site was exploding but I enjoyed the short time I spent there. I was introduced to the Star Trek reboot movies, GenRex, and Ben 10 Alien Force during this time. I futzed around in communities for those fandoms (and the aforementioned fandoms) for a year before I gleaned everyone was mid-exodus and followed to tumblr. I made my first tumblr blog in summer of 2010 but didn’t really start using it regularly until 2011.

I was immediately sucked into the SPN fandom! The pretty blue eyed angel standing in a shower of sparks won my heart and I’ve been in hell ever since. (Even when you leave the SPN fandom you never really leave.) 

Simultaneously, Young Justice started and I enthusiastically jumped in--unearthing my early childhood love of Batman: TAS, Justice League/Unlimited, Batman Beyond, and Teen Titans in the process. I proceeded to rewatch all of those shows. When rewatching JLU I distinctly remember flashing back to the memory of me sobbing over both Solomon Grundy and the Flash nearly/outright dying in their respective JLU episodes when I was roughly eight years old. This is the first time I can remember contemplating death and experiencing empathy for a fictional character. I’m still wrecked if I watch those episodes! (Really DCAU as a whole is pretty heartwrenching and will wreck my ass.)

Also around that time I also was introduced to Ao3 and spent many months just casually reading fic there before I finally wised up and created an account in the summer of 2011.

Iron Man and Thor were my gateway to the greater MCU. I experienced peak tumblr from 2012-2015. Superwholock was everywhere and you can hate it as much as you want but it got me into Doctor Who and I am so, so fucking thankful for all of those fandoms. They were so sincere and enthusiastic and wanting to see the next episode/season and liveblog it along side everyone else were sometimes the only reason teenage me had for not wanting to kill herself.

I made it through the worst of it in my personal life. College happened. I stayed on tumblr even when the Purge happened in 2018. I mourn the loss of p0rn and had to fan myself when I rediscovered the old sideblog I made just for hardcore lemony fanart that I forgot existed until I started making this post.

I’m an adult in a much better place. I’m anxious sometimes about what will happen next in fandom and sometimes nostalgia for what came before makes me feel gloomy/overly pessimistic--but regardless of what comes next, in the end I believe it will be an adventure and full of exploration! I will adapt and I will thrive and I will squee along side everyone else as new and wonderous fandoms emerge!

#the fanscape #for me #superwholock #cw: suicide mention #peak tumblr years