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#im not even doing my 20 days challenge cause i am quick to be distracted and busy with school
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What are the best techniques to overcome HOCD? This question previously had question details. You can find them in the question comments. AnswerRequest Follow14 Have this question too? Request Answers: Request From Quora We will distribute this question to writers, and notify you about new answers. Erez Seyger Erez Seyger 14 Answers in LGBTQI Dylan Boschert Dylan Boschert 3 Answers in LGBTQI Dani Lamothe Dani Lamothe, Part-Time Student, Full-Time Dork 9 Answers in LGBTQI Luna SunnyChantal PetitpasMegan ThomasView More or Search 5 ANSWERS Quora User Anonymous Answered Dec 25, 2014 I had suffered for 7 years with OCD, and only just now learned that it was actually HOCD. Thank you for enlightening me. During my long struggle with that crippling anxiety, I severed connections with friends, family, education, and recreation. My entire waking (and oftentimes, inexplicably sleeping) life was devoted to curing myself of OCD. My days were spent chanting my way through the corridors of my house, muttering phrases under my breath while I walked through doors and turned on faucets, and washed my body. Everything I put near my mouth or held in my hand was transformed into something sexual. I kept these thoughts at bay by combating them with similar yet opposing heterosexual thoughts. I imagined a force field around myself when in the company of others, suppressing the sexually intrusive thoughts about the people around me. They manifested into actual physical discomfort. I could not concentrate in my classes because I was preoccupied with repulsing uncomfortable sexual thoughts. If someone of the same gender sat behind me in class, I could forget about retaining any of the information shared there. I failed my way through high school, in the end. I cried every night into my pillow about how I did not want to be gay, and questioning why these thoughts would not stop. Most puzzling of all was that I was not aroused by them. I protested, much to my embarrassment, to my parents that I was not gay, and promised them I never would be. Both of them were extremely kind and loving, and would have loved me just as much if I were gay. They were left perplexed, and fearful for my health. From morning until night, and sometimes even in my dreams, I was never free. I waged wars in my head. I hurt myself physically, assuming that whatever was doing this inside of my head was sentient, and would thus "share pain" with me, like some kind of parasite. I made a death pact with myself, saying that if I wasn't "cured" by 20 years old, I would commit suicide, because I would rather end things than continue living this kind of life forever. Psychiatrists hawking their antidepressants were quick to assure me that this was a lifelong issue--"you have a chemical imbalance, and like a diabetic requires insulin, you need to regulate it." Then things changed. The key was so obvious, so simple. I imagined the "cure" for this predicament I was in would be something complex, bordering on the esoteric, some kind of exorcism or invasive surgery-- but it was laughably simple: I was pushing, where I should have been pulling. I attended several cognitive behavioral therapy sessions with a specialist in the field of OCD. My psychologist taught me simple skills for dealing with these thoughts. Essentially, she told me to pull them out, instead of push them away. Bring them into focus when they come in. Welcome them. Let them know you're not afraid of them. "When they come into your head, you tell them: bring it on" were her words. She had me sit down for an hour a day, close my eyes, and remove all distractions from my room (television, radio, music, raucous family). She told me to seek out those thoughts that were plaguing me all day (not difficult, as I was well acquainted with every last one of them), and as uncomfortable as it may seem initially, to hold them into focus for as long as I could without pushing them away. She told me to do this for an hour a day. Immediately I could feel the difference. It was like a 7-year-burden being lifted off of my shoulders. My mind had instantly become accustomed to them. I could walk through a doorway without pause, hold a pencil and draw again, and turn on a faucet with no problems. I began to push past the 1 hour mark, and would even perform this exercise while out and about. I turned the intrusive thoughts into comedy, and often thought up outlandish sexual scenarios that made me laugh out loud! I became a master of that which had previously plagued me. And almost explosively, the spring I had suppressed with all of my energy all of those years, had become uncoiled. Like seeing a scary movie for the seventh time, its power of me had diminished. Within a month or so of these daily exercises, my life had noticeably changed. After two months, I was a different person. After three months, I found I had more free time than I knew what to do with, and devoted it to diet, exercise, study and self-improvement. I body build now, am fluent in three languages, and graduated from college with honors. Math, which was especially hard in my high school years, became enjoyable. I've traveled all over the world, and am just married to my beautiful wife, while working in an interesting field. Sometimes I feel pangs of anxiety reminiscent of these times- it comes back now and then. But I quickly meet them with the meditative exercise of bringing them into the light, and they are just as quickly disappeared. I used to think I was the only one with this affliction. I thought there was no one I could talk to about it. It was very disheartening. If I could go back in time and let myself know one thing, it would be that there is hope, that this was not the life-long affliction it was touted to be. I hope I am able to do the same for anyone who reads this. 29.3k Views 23 others upvoted this Upvote Downvote Share Shivam Kuchhal Shivam Kuchhal Hello, I just turned 20 two days back and I also have been seeing a psychiatrist who said I have ... Quora User Anonymous Answered Jan 29, 2015 Thank you! I've had HOCD for almost a month now but I can't bear it any longer. The first days of it were extremely terrifying for me with non stop anxiety, then those horrible thoughts and the fear remained, but I didn't had anxiety anymore. Now I feel like I went back to were I started again without explanation, it's just hard to get it out of your mind... This will help me so much! Can't believe you struggled with this for so long... I wish you the best! 11.3k Views 6 others upvoted this Upvote Downvote Share Venting MachineComment... RecommendedAll Quora User Anonymous Answered Jul 25, 2016 Hello, I used to struggle with this for several months and cognitive behavior therapy helped me the most. Have you considered writing a thought diary? There are many apps that can help you do this with rating yourself at the end. Challenge your thoughts and provide logic to your worried mind. This can be a condition that is extremely difficult to deal with and makes you question everything you’ve known about yourself which raises so many doubts. But don’t make the problem seem really big or scary. Make it look small and insignificant in your mind and try to also be OK with the possibility of actually going down that path - expose yourself to that and you’ll realize that it’s not as big a deal as your brain is making it out to be. I realize that I’m writing this very casually but I know how difficult it is to deal with when you’re going through it. Just hang in there and take a few deep breaths and write it all out. And the thing with HOCD is that it’s another manifestation of OCD. So there can be just about anything that can make you thinking and cause this. Write the thought diary for every worrisome thought that you come by - however small it may be. Eventually, they will all become insignificant thoughts. Hope you’re doing better! 6.6k Views Upvote Downvote Share Venting MachineComment... RecommendedAll Ricky Bobby Ricky Bobby Answered Aug 20 Mine is very similar to the previous story but it’ll help you. So relax dude, you’re not gay, trust me. This is just a hurdle you’re going to conquer. I did it and you definitely can too. So I had this HOCD for like, I don’t know, 5–10 years!!!…It was horrid!..I even went to a ‘coming out’ group but was asking ‘how do I really know if I’m really gay?…This one gay guy was like if you look at another man’s ass and are like yeah…check that out.. But I was like, well that doesn’t do it for me but I’m still stressing out. I even made myself look at gay porn but still was not with it. I was seeing dicks everywhere at times, I was like Jonah Hill in the movie Superbad, it was not fun at all. Kind of funny now though. I mean we can condition ourselves to like fuking anything really if we wanted to right? I’ve slept with many women since an early age so if anything I was like I could be possibly bi but it just didn’t seem genuine. I’m kind of an artist and my dad wasn’t around so much when I was younger so the mind tends to look for reasons and connections to tie into especially about everything you’re scared of. I went to multiple therapists, took self-improvement seminars…I wanted to be done with it!! Until I finally came to something that worked!! Here it is my lucky friends. Hope this frees you!!!! FREE AT LAST, FREE AT LAST…Try this shit out and welcome aboard of leaving that nonsense behind you… I finally came across a CBT therapist where we did ‘Exposure Therapy’ (as mentioned in the other write-up) and this was indeed the cure! This is what specifically worked for me and still does to this day (it’s been like 10 years!). Whenever I feel a trigger like anything gayed up or other & feeling anxious (I hardly do anymore), I will just imagine or pretend that I am gay for like a few minutes in my mind..Just tell yourself ‘okay I guess I will be gay for a day’ and just IMAGINE it but make it comical…At first I think I did it for like 20–30 minutes or it could’ve been longer (I don’t remember) just at my house…Just be like (say to yourself) ‘HEY… let’s go shoe shopping’ (with a lisp)…make it funny man… And once you kind of try it on and don’t resist it …it let’s go and it’ll fade out. Embrace it here and there (but you still know that you’re not) but you’re just imagining it / pretending as like an exercise like you’re an actor. Try a CBT therapist for guided exposure therapy if you don’t get relief after a while, it’s painless and confidential so don’t worry about going. It’s the fearful association that keeps the attachment to it. I think every guy goes through this at some time. Why wouldn’t we, it’s scary shit once we see it’s a possibility or are around it at some point..haa but it’s like a growing pain that can happen really at any time in your life. The mind needs to hash it out. It’s surfacing for you to be healed friend. If you were gay, you wouldn’t be here stressing about it, you’d probably be wondering how to connect with other gay men instead. Our mind finds shit that’s scary and dwells on it until it’s boring then looks for something else…There’s a few TV shows & movies that made me feel better too: I remember George in Seinfeld got a massage from a guy and his dik moved and so he got all freaked out that maybe he was secretly gay. In Everybody loves Raymond, he was questioning his heterosexuality on one episode which was really funny (maybe search on youtube) and then there’s the movie, 40 yr old virgin, the scene, “ You know how I know your gay..” … which makes light of this problem and proves most guys go through this at some point. Hope this helps. Best~ 415 Views 1 other upvoted this Upvote Downvote Share Venting MachineComment... RecommendedAll Fred LaFlare Fred LaFlare Answered May 6 Find another bad habit like smoking and drinking and break it.This will empower you. 661 Views
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