#im kinda sensible to smells so i would pick it up FAST if he used something
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I just KNOW Mammon has a lot of perfumes that he's received as gifts from photoshoots so he smells amazing anytime he uses them, I just wanna sleep with my head on his chest
#im kinda sensible to smells so i would pick it up FAST if he used something#i thank nice smells for existing#and also Mammon#all I write is about you#f/o community#self ship community#self shipping#self ship#f/o#queerplatonic f/o#selfship#platonic f/o
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in which dex & bitty have a fight, bitty & ransom make out, dex comes to realize a few things, & poor nursey is ghosted for a couple hours. also pie.
[Part of the Blue-Eyed Jack ‘Verse. Set loosely between All Decked Out Like a Cowboy’s Dream and Kitty & the Biscuits]
CW: dubious consent (drunk surprise kissing), vague homophobia, coming out, canon typical alcohol abuse (they are taking very small shots i promise)
CON’T TEXT CONVERSATION BETWEEN YOU AND DEREK NURSE
WP: And then Cait said she’d call the cops and those kids ran so fast, it was hilarious.
DN: who’s Cait?
DN: also LOL
WP: Chow’s girlfriend.
DN: wait i thought you guys were all gay
WP: Why would you think that?
DN: ur the Gay Country Band i thought that meant the Whole band
WP: No.
WP: Just Bitty.
WP: I think.
WP: Chowder has a girlfriend.
WP: Ransom’s brought girls home more than once.
WP: Just Bitty.
DN: what about u?
WP: What about me?
DN: u just listed all the reasons ur bandmates aren’t gay
DN: but not urself
DN: y?
WP: I didn’t think I needed to say it.
WP: What does it matter?
DN: idk just curious
WP: Whatever.
Dex huffed and slumped back against the nasty, green couch. He knew Bitty would make a fuss about sitting on it -- the thing had been a point of contention between him and Chowder for months now -- but the only other option were the lumpy arm chairs and Dex hated those things.
“You texting with Derek again?”
Dex started; he hadn't realized Bitty was home. “Yeah. Why d’you ask?”
Bitty cast him a wry look over the back of the couch. “He stresses you out in a way only Chowder ever has.”
“That's not true,” Dex said grumpily. “You stress me out the most.”
“So kind,” Bitty teased. “Keep up that kinda sweet talk and I'll think you're flirting with me.”
Normally Dex would've laughed at the absurdity of the idea, but today it gave him pause. “Do people really think we’re the ‘gay country band?’”
Bitty’s smile fell. “Well, yeah, sort of. Why?”
Dex shrugged, glancing at his phone. “I don't know. Just something Derek said. I thought it was like...you were the ‘gay country singer’ and we were just your band.”
Bitty’s face grew steely and he crossed his arms over his chest. “I'm sorry you have to suffer through the inconvenience of people assuming you're gay, that must just be so difficult-”
“Bitty,” Dex started, but Bitty was already headed out of the room.
“I'm going to the store,” Bitty said gruffly, grabbing his wallet from the key basket. “Be back later.” Dex stood to follow, hand outstretched.
“Bits-” But the front door slammed shut. Dex huffed a frustrated sigh and punched the wall, not quite hard enough to break anything but just enough to hurt.
Why was it that Derek’s texts annoyed him so much? Dex had never minded being lumped in with the rainbow flags and hell-bound accusations before; the Biscuits were a team and a team stuck together, had each other’s backs. Bitty was the only one of them who was gay, but they all stood for his message.
Except...except maybe he wasn't the only one at all.
It had been about a year prior, and they were on the last stretch of a tour, heading from Boise to Seattle through a long stretch of absolutely nothing. Rans had picked up a thing of decent whiskey in a sketchy, Idaho liquor store and they were in the middle of a rousing game of never have I ever. Chowder was winning at this point, with only a few fingers down, but seemed to be mercilessly targeting Bitty.
(“Never ever I have ever...lived in Madison, Georgia.”
“I swear to God, Christopher-”)
Dex was doing alright himself. He'd been impacted by Bitty’s attacks against northerners and hockey fans, but not in the same way Ransom had. Now they were battling each other ruthlessly, determined not to go out first. Bitty had two fingers left; Ransom had one.
There was something dangerously smug in Ransom’s drunken gaze as he rounded on Bitty, smirk growing. “Never ever have I ever...kissed another man.”
Bitty gasped indignantly and took his shot like a champ, very reluctantly lowering a finger. Before the next turn could be taken, however, he lunged across the circle and pulled Ransom’s mouth to his.
It wasn't the most coordinated kissing Dex had ever seen. Ransom was drunk enough that the force of it knocked him over to the side, and he dragged Bitty with him. Bitty paid no mind to the fact that he was now lying on top of his best friend; they both sort of got lost in the movements of their lips, kissing languidly and sloppily for a moment, like they were the only two people on that bus.
Then Bitty pulled back with a triumphant grin and shouted, “Take a shot, Justin.”
“No!” Ransom flopped back onto the ground, covering his face in his hands. “Bits that was a dirty move. I call foul!”
“Don't be a sore loser,” Bitty chirped, filling Ransom’s shot glass halfway. Dex supposed it would've been filled all the way if Bitty hadn't spilled so much onto the floor of the tour bus.
“Bitty, that was great!” Chowder said through his laughter. “Wasn't it, Dex?”
But Dex couldn't answer, all too aware of the uncomfortable tightness of his pants. He willed himself to calm down, to not show just how much he'd been affected by the scene in front of him.
“Oh, I'm sorry,” Bitty was huffing out as Ransom tried to sit on him. “Did I offend your delicate, Canadian sensibilities?”
“I'll show you delicate,” Ransom hissed, using his full body weight to squish Bitty against the floor. Bitty’s cheeks had gone bright red from the liquor and the exertion, and Dex found the sight more intoxicating than the alcohol in his bloodstream. “You're a huge cheater and I'm gonna make sure the whole world knows.” He pulled a marker from his pocket, uncapping it with his teeth.
“No you don't!” Bitty shouted, struggling against Ransom, but Ransom was twice his size and loomed over him. Dex swallowed roughly. “We have an interview tomorrow! Absolutely not! Do not draw on my face- I will call your mother right now.”
Somewhere in there, Dex excused himself to the bathroom, and hoped no one noticed when he took a little extra time and returned glassy-eyed and out of breath.
When Bitty returned from the “store” several hours later, he was met by the sight of a pie. Peaches and cream, to be exact.
It was nothing fancy, not like the salted rose and honey pie Bitty had made the day before, the crust shaped into beautiful braids and flower petals, but it was the one kind of pie Bitty could never bring himself to make, despite the fact that it was his favorite. Dex had a hunch as to why this was, but had never gotten a direct answer about it. And that didn’t matter right now.
“I didn’t…” He started as Bitty cautiously stepped into the kitchen, eyes wide as he studied the pie on the table. “I wasn’t trying to imply I was- it’s not-”
“Dex, it’s fine,” Bitty said sullenly. “You’re not the first straight guy I’ve known who’s-”
“I’m gay,” Dex blurted out, wringing his hands together. “Um. Yeah.”
Bitty’s eyes, if possible, grew wider. “Oh! Oh, Dex, I’m sorry, I shouldn’t’ve- I should’ve-”
“You didn’t know,” Dex said with a small shrug. “And honestly...I haven’t been sure about it myself. Until now.”
“Oh, hun.” Bitty surged forward and pulled Dex into a tight hug. Dex let out a breath he hadn’t realized he’d been holding and rested his chin on top of Bitty’s head. “C’mon, let’s eat this pie you made and you can talk about it. Or not!” He added, pulling back with a worried expression. “You don’t have to, unless you want to, but if you want to I’m always here, please know that-”
“Bits.” Dex grabbed both of his shoulders, smiling down at him. “There’s no one else I’d want to talk to about it more.”
“Because I’m the only gay guy you know?” Bitty chirped, moving to cut two slices of pie. Dex rolled his eyes.
“I do have other friends, you know,” he said, pulling out two plates and two forks.
“Sure,” Bitty said lightly. “And I’m an NBA player.” He handed a plate to Dex with a teasing grin.
“Ass,” Dex said, but kissed Bitty’s cheek lightly in thanks. Bitty rolled his eyes but Dex felt a million pounds lighter, just from the sheer freedom of being able to do something like that without consequence, at least in the safety of their kitchen. Bitty took his own slice and shepherded Dex into the living room, chatting a mile a minute about how good the pie smelled and how impressed he was Dex had made it all on his own.
When Chowder returned from Cait’s that evening, he walked into the living room to see Bitty and Dex asleep on the couch -- on top of a beach towel, obviously -- Bitty’s legs perched in Dex’s lap and an empty pie tin sitting on the coffee table.
In Dex’s hand, about to fall to the floor, was his phone, still open to some text thread. Carefully, Chowder took the phone and set it on the table, noticing that the thread was with Derek Nurse, unsurprisingly. They’d all befriended the Falcs the evening Bitty and Jack got together; Chowder himself was frequently in contact with Snowy and Tater, and on occasion Nurse himself. He didn’t look at the thread, but if he had, it might’ve made him smile.
CON’T TEXT CONVERSATION BETWEEN YOU AND DEREK NURSE
WP: Sorry for ghosting. Had a fight with Bitty.
DN: dude u ok?
WP: Yeah, it’s all sorted out.
WP: Also sorry for being a dick earlier. You didn’t deserve that reaction.
DN: nah im sorry for prying
WP: It’s just...not something I’m ready to talk about with most people just yet.
DN: will you don’t have to say anything you don’t want to
DN: we’re not bffs i understand
WP: No, I trust you.
WP: But it’s hard.
WP: Bitty’s a good first step I think.
WP: Then...friends.
DN: like me?
WP: Yeah. Like you.
DN: that’s
DN: that means a lot
DN: thank you
WP: Don’t let it go to your head.
DN: wouldn’t dream of it. ;)
WP: Ugh I already regret telling you this.
DN: no take backs. Ur stuck with me :D
WP: There are worse things I guess.
DN: chlamydia?
WP: Goodnight, Derek.
DN: night, will. don’t let the bedbugs bite
DN: unless ur into that ;) ;) ;)
WP: Go away
DN: :*
DN: wow did u really text jack to tell me to shut up?
DN: rude
DN: goodNIGHT will, hope bitty feeds u poisoned pie
WP: :*
DN: emoticon. can’t tell if im proud or mad
DN: u better sleep w one eye open
WP: Go to sleep. I’ll still be here to annoy in the morning.
DN: good :)
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