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#im in the shower and i was thinking damn….that man was actually fine asf
diorsbrando · 5 months
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me realizing that i met a dilf a few nights ago . . . . .
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sequoiann · 7 years
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❧ b.sk | roommate!au
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pairing; seventeen seungkwan x reader
genre; bulletpointed, roommate!seungkwan, humor (loads of this), fluff (loads of this too)
✎a/n; i’m eggcited for this wewew hope ya’ll enjoy thiss !! psps. i’m probably gonna do this on a lot of other members so do leave a msg in my inbox to let me know who you’d like to see a roommate!au on ;))
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UWAKK I CAN ALREADY PICTURE THIS
ok so so sO!
seungkwan
boo seungkwan
as a roommate
you seriously won’t know whether to thank all the gods up there for sending you such an angelic patootie 
or to curse the devils for sending you one of their kind
bc not gon lie but seungkwan is a real mix
the story of how the two of you ended up in the same dorm room is really simple tbh
according to school protocols ;; male dorms and female dorms should be far apart
like really far apart
bc no one wants ehEM EHEM to happen right?
wrong lol 
the university gives no shit about that man
they just mix whatever they want
but most girls and guys willingly stick to sharing a room with the same gender since it’ll be less awkward
but you transferred to the school around midterms 
and the girls’ dorms were full
or at least that’s what they told you
so they decide to put you in the guys’ dorms
“you don’t mind, right?” 
“of course not. everything’s alright.” 
“great. here’s your key. eleventh floor, room five.” 
ok you minded
a lot.
like you pretty much have to live with this guy now?? and if he’s messy and disgusting and—
oh my god you didn’t even want to think about it
you kinda resigned to your fate and went straight to the dorms, to your room, bc you had a shitload of luggage to park.
when you got in, you were pleasantly surprised
the place was really really really clean??
like there were no random trousers hanging everywhere and the floor felt really dust-less
and you felt that ray of hope that this plan wouldn’t be so bad after all
and like juST before you were about to unpack
the door opens
//grand music plays
seungkwan enters
but at that time you didn’t know him yet so you just awkwardly scramble to your feet
and bow slightly since you were aware that your roommate was a year older
and do your formal introduction of ‘hi i’m y/n please take care of mi’
you look up and notice he’s cute
like cute as in
the baby kind of cute screeeeches
and he looked nice and quiet
HA ‘QUIET’ WHAT WERE YOU EVEN THINKING
ok so he introduces himself as seungkwan 
and the start was really awkward tbh 
the both of you were just literally walking circles around the room and staying on opposite ends bc awKWARD !1!!
you weren’t one to start a convo so yeah this time was no exception
but seungkwan actually initiated one and you were so relieved bc you were literally suffocating from this awkward air
he was like “so, um, you’re a year younger?” 
“yeah”
“do you need help, er, unpacking?”
you turn to your heavy ass luggage and overflowing clothes and laughed
“yeah, i guess?”
seungkwan looked excited bc he internally wanted to do sth so ya’ll can get over this ice cold thing
so ice ice baby ok i’m sorry let’s continue
and he literally bounces on two feet and like goes over to you and hE LOOKED LIKE AN ADORABLE PENGUIN ASDFGHJK
he helps you get your clothes out and like a lot of them got unfolded so he kindly folds them back and stacks them neatly
then he like opens the empty side of the closet which he wasn’t using and helps you load your clothes in there
and he hangs up your coats before coming back to you 
who was struggling with the cables you had put in your bag bc they tangled up real bad
meANWHILE
seungkwan decides to unzip a ‘hidden compartment’ of your luggage 
and vOILA
he bursts into laughter and you had no idea what was going on
then you notice the unzipped compartment and you just
“SEUNGKWAN !!!?!??!?!?” 
and he was literally a laughing mess on the floor like his ears were red and he was rolling about trying to catch his breath but it wasn’t working
bc,,,, you kept your bra and undies in there
and seungkwan saw it
zE eMBArrASSmENT 
seungkwan manages to choke out an ‘iM soRRY’ before he continues dying in his own laughter
and you can’t help but laugh too bc his laughter was contagious asf
and bc of this incident ,,, ya’ll became really really close
it’s like a ‘he already saw my undergarments on our first meeting what worse can happen’
so yall became very open with each other
like after four months or so ya’ll bFF MAN
he even knew where you kept your pads
bc there were those days where it just comes unexpectedly and you don’t know until you strip in the toilet for a bath
so you just scream for seungkwan to pass you one like
“seUNGKWANN”
“YA”
“WILL YOU BE A DEAR AND—”
“YA SURE” 
that was great to you tbh like it made life so convenient
but the downsides of having seungkwan as a roommate 
lolol 
so many many
seungkwan’s in the school choir (which surprisingly accepts both boys & girls)
so he claims he needs his personal vocal practice
every.
single.
day.
and the room turns into a freaking opera theatre istg
like you literally hear him go do re mi fa SO LAR TEE DOHHHHH
while you’re there just trying to get your shit tgt
and you sometimes suspect he’s just trying to annoy you on purpose
bc he goes wAAY out of tune just to hit the extra extra high notes
and he even screeches sometimes and oh god your goosebumps just ploop
 “ seungkwan. ”
“ SOLLLL “
“ boo “
“ LAAAAAAA “
“ seung “
“ TEEEEEEEEEEE”
and you dont even bother to say the last syllable of his name and you just glare at him and he just shuts up and laughs really loud like his eyes squints together and he just drops onto the bed
adorable
he’s also really childish at heart so
he likes messing with you when you’re in the shower
he would turn off the heater and/or the lights
and the first time he turned off the lights you freaked out really badly bc you were afraid of the dark and you genuinely thought there was a blackout
and you shouted for him but he didn’t know you were scared so he just silently snickered outside
but when he heard you sob on the other side of the door
oHhHHhhH GOOD GOD
he quickly turns the lights back on and like when you come out he was so damn apologetic like
“i’m so sorry i didn’t know omg”
“ i h8 YOU “
but no you didn’t lol you loved this squish
and he made up for it by literally being by your side for the next few days
and cuDDLE SESSIONS BECAME A THING
i mean
ya’ll were roommates
cuddling is the most normal thing to happen
so aft that ‘blackout’ incident ,,, that night ,,,
you couldn’t sleep lol
you guys had a really wide bunk bed if that made sense??
it was almost like a second story on the upper deck
seungkwan had been taking the bottom deck so when you moved in you just took the one at the top
and thAT NIGHT
you just kept tossing and turning and like the bed would shake a little every time you move
so seungkwan can’t sleep either since the bed just keeps wobbling
“you can’t sleep?” he says,, just staring up
“…yeah.”
and then there’s this short silence.
“you up for cuddles?”
and another silence.
bc ngl you lived for cuddles
but you would get really insecure about everything bc like your cuddle partner would be sososo close ?? ya’know??
but before you can reply,,
seungkwan literally just comes up and pokes his head to your deck and grins and you just laugh
aandddd he just scurries to your side and plonks down 
“ you’re not against this, right? ”
he just doesn’t want you to feel uncomfortable or anything uk
“ n-no, i’m not. ”
seungkwan would like laugh at your nervousness,, but he just wraps his arm around you and just stroke your hair and stuff like that 
and it calmed you down a loooot.
he was so warm and comfy you honestly just wanted to stay in his arms forever lolol
so this cuddle thing became a very natural thing since it happened often aft that
and when the two of you actually fall asleep
it’s a totally different thing in the middle of the night 
you would accidentally jab him in the eyeballs since you move q alot when you sleep
and he just jerks awake like whO IS YOU WHO AWOKE ME FROM MAI BEAUTY SLEEP
then he sees you with your arms sprawled everywhere and he’d just laugh quietly before tucking you back under the covers
and the next morning he’d complain all about it
“ Y/N ”
“ ?? whAT ”
“ YOU NEARLY TORE MY EYEBALLS OUT OF THEIR SOCKETS YTD ”
ya he exaggerates a lot
and you’d just laugh bc you are aware of the fact that you are kinda violent when you’re in dreamland
but seungkwan honestly doesn’t mind lol bc other than that,, you were a good cuddle buddy
oK MOVING ON
can you imagine when ya’ll have to order food
HAHAHA it’s like tug of war
like you like fried chicken
but he likes seasoned chicken
and you guys can’t buy both bc you guys were supposed to sneak it into the dorms
and two packs of chicken would be like bringing a freaking mountain into the dorm
so you two just start throwing random stuff at each other
“ you broke my pen ytd?? ”
“you dropped my compact powder and it got everywhere.”
“ya but u made me clean the entire room bc of that.”
“but we got seasoned chicken in the cafeteria”
“horrible ones.”
“yoU TURNED OFF THE LIGHTS THAT DAY”
“no, okay, but —”
“YOU MADE ME CRI”
seungkwan just gives up and 
“fiNE FRIED CHICKEN OK”
//internal evil laughter
“love you seungkwannn”
//finger guns
seungkwan just shakes his head and places the order and turns away from you to let out his smile
ok ya so all in all
seungkwan would just be a really soft and annoying roommate 
and the two of you would be like the bickering best friends
heartheart
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