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im-that-bitch-still-that-bitch · 4 years

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A Place to Recover~s.b.

a/n: this is the first thing I’ve ever written on here, so I hope people like it! I just couldn’t get this idea for a story out of my head and had to write it. more parts to come... and it starts at the end of the first season with an alternate ending to the whole heading exploding thing

Part I-Homecoming: the prequel

The peaceful guitar melody of “Kiss me” by Sixpence None the Richer hummed softly out of Erin Brennan’s iPhone speaker as she put the finishing touches on her makeup for the homecoming dance. As she pulled loose strands of hair out of her half-up ponytail and laced up her converse, she couldn’t help but notice her hands shaking. Her best friend’s words earlier that week echoed in her ears,

“You just can’t wear heels. No guy wants to dance with a girl who’s taller than him.”

Erin didn’t want to give off a “girl who wears converse with a dress to be quirky” vibe, but she despised ballet flats, so what else was there?

She straightened up and looked into her full-length mirror at her lanky body in the pale pink slip dress she’d bought at a thrift store a week ago. The only thought racing through her mind was how stupid she felt, but that feeling always seemed to come with getting dressed up for Erin. She felt like an imposter.

“Do you really think you can convince people you’re pretty?”

As her dark brown eyes met her own in the mirror, she noticed a single tear threatening to slip out of her perfectly curled lashes, “Fuck.”

She had promised herself she wouldn’t smoke or drink at all before the dance because of the homecoming debacle of 2018 when not one, but three of her friends she showed got kicked out and suspended for being drunk, but as soon as that little tear began threatening to fall, she caught it on her index finger and climbed out onto her roof with a joint in hand.

As she felt the joint burn down to a tiny nub and the heat in it growing closer to her fingers, she let it fall onto the wet grass of her backyard and climbed back in through her window. Her timing was opportune because just as she latched the window closed, her sister barged into her room,

“Erin, we’ve been calling you for like ten minutes. Mom wants pictures,” Clare said, running out of breath.

“Yeah, I’m coming. Sorry, I didn’t hear you over my music.” She was in the clear luckily.

But as she strolled towards her bedroom door to follow in Clare’s lead, Clare stayed put. She whipped around and sniffed Erin’s shoulder. “You might want to put on some perfume,” she turned back and walked another two paces before turning to Erin once more to taunt, “Pothead!”

Erin laughed and spritzed perfume on her dress, then walked out the door. Mrs. Brennan squinted at her phone while snapping pictures of Erin with her best friend Kate, claiming she would only take “one more,” once every two minutes.

“We’re leaving mooom,” Erin called as she opened the passenger seat to Kate’s Mercedes Benz. The two had been best friends since middle school, making quite the dorky duo when they were both in puberty’s punishing grasp. When high school started, Kate blossomed into the perfect picture of a conventionally attractive woman, earning her lots of popularity. In a way, she dragged Erin to her new friend group. They were less than welcoming seeing as Erin was a bit offbeat, but they knew Kate was too stubborn to leave her other half behind.

The two girls stepped into the gym and admired the golden glow of fairy lights hung from the ceiling. They spotted their friends immediately, and the bubbly girls ran to them and insisted on hitting the photo booth. Of course, they all immediately came up with about a dozen different combinations of girls they wanted in a photo, none of which included Erin.

“I can hold everyone’s purses,” Erin spoke shyly. The girls all jumped on the idea, piling their clutches in their arms. Erin would get annoyed, but this was high school for her; catering to her so-called friends’ interests and needs because if they dropped her, where would she go, anyway?

Feeling more confident than ever due to her high, Erin marched up to the DJ booth, “What is going on with this set list?” The boy behind the booth shrugged indignantly, clearly not looking to cater to this girl’s music taste. The two argued for nearly five minutes.

“Listen, if you don’t wanna play Twin Peaks, then at least just go for a crowd favorite to play it safe.”

A voice spoke up from next to her, “Twin Peaks, huh? Not bad. I just came over here to figure out what the hell’s going on with this set list.” Stanley Barber stood beside Erin with his arms folded, staring the DJ down.

“Oh, hey Stan,” Erin said, then turned to the DJ, “Listen, man. I’m just trying to help. Do what you wanna do.” And with that, she was off.

Stanley watched the girl walk away, sort of amazed that she knew his name, but then again, that was the popular people’s job; knowing everyone. She had actually first caught his attention in his debate class, when she’s known for sparring with Bradley Lewis. Two weeks prior, they’d had quite the nasty exchange:

“I just think people should be less harsh on men with all this ‘Me Too’ crap.”

“If you think that you’re part of the problem. The behaviors these men are getting in trouble for are toxic, and they were normalized in a toxic society.”

“Maybe you think that way, but not everyone’s a crazy feminist bitch,” he spat.

Erin scrunched her nose with distaste, “Call me a crazy bitch again, Lewis, it really gets me hot and bothered.” Of course, the inevitable came, “ooh’s” and gasps from their classmates and a day in detention for the two debaters.

It was days like that when the distinction between Erin and her friends became clear. She was stubborn as hell and refused to try to please people like Bradley Lewis. Stan respected her for it, but what did the local pot dealer’s respect mean? Nothing.

The rest of the night went as usual. The group of girls all danced together, squealing with excitement when their song came on. Erin was (thankfully) able to find a boy from the hockey team to dance with for the slow dance who was pretty nice, wandering hands aside.

The trouble came when it was time to announce homecoming queen and king. “All right ladies and gentlemen, may I have your attention? Stop right there, please. It is my privilege to introduce your homecoming king and queen, Jeff Butters and Julie Frasheski!” Erin and her friends all cheered extra loud, as Julie had shown up with them. Jeff Butters began his less than graceful speech, only to be interrupted by none other than Erin’s infamous debate opponent.

The boy jerked around on stage, trying to avoid the principal’s grasp, “I would like to take this moment to talk about something very important that affects everyone here. Sydney Novak. Hey, Sydney! Give a wave so everybody can see you.”

Erin felt her jaw clenching with anger, but she’d be lying if she said she wasn’t at least a bit thankful Brad hadn’t chosen her as the subject of this odd callout speech, as they were sworn enemies.

He continued, “You see, what a lot of people don’t know about Sydney here… she is one hell of a writer.” The boy pulled a notebook out of his Letterman jacket pocket, and the tension in the room skyrocketed. “You know, it’s funny, because everyone is so fast to call me an asshole, but while I was downstairs banging Jenny Tuffield at Ricky’s, guess what Sydney was doing upstairs.”

Erin racked her mind trying to remember which party Ricky has hosted. The memories of playing beer pong with Julie, Becca, and Kate came flooding back into her mind. Becca puked in the bushes at the end of the night, and a football player had asked Erin for her “hot friend’s number,” which happened a lot.

“She was kissing my girlfriend,” Bradley spat into the mic. Erin anxiously chewed her lip, trying to think of something, anything, to do to stop whatever Brad was attempting. She didn’t know Syd, but she knew that getting made fun of by Bradley Lewis was no walk in the park, and no one deserves to be outed against their will.

The boy drew closer and closer to Syd, continuing his monologue of hatred, full of homophobic slurs, of course. As he continued to rib on the girl, even getting into her family life, Stanley Barber marched out of the crowd, gentlemanly as always, “Hey, man. Leave her alone.” His heroic gesture was cut short by Brad swinging a right hook punch right across his cheek.

Erin grew more and more anxious. She hadn’t even noticed that she had been cowering backwards until she felt her back hit the wall. She gasped and turned around. She scanned the room, seeing that everyone’s eyes were on Brad. Another key thing that she observed was the fire alarm right next to her shoulder. Her mind raced at the speed of light: “If Brad is exposing whoever he doesn’t like, then I’m next… Falsely pulling a fire alarm is a federal offense… What if I tackled him…. He’d beat the shit out of me.” Her thoughts began to overlap and get more jumbled, when she felt impulsivity take over her body as she yanked on the fire alarm. The sprinklers turned on, and a chorus of whines and shrieks came from the students who were currently getting soaked.

Erin’s chest began to rise and fall more quickly with every anxious breath. She stood frozen in place watching everyone flee the scene. After the main crowds scattered, she saw Dina and Syd each hooking an arm under Stan’s armpits and carrying him out of the gym. In a moment of bravery, Erin asked if they needed help and ran to the three. Syd and Dina accepted thankfully as Erin picked up the boy’s ankles and began to walk backwards, “Let me know if I’m about to bump into something, okay?”

The three finally reached Stan’s car and laid him down in the back seat. Just as Erin caught her breath, she heard tires screeching and saw Kate’s Mercedes Benz whipping out of the school parking lot with a drenched Julie and Becca in the back. “Shit,” she muttered.

“I-is something wrong?” Dina asked.

“Um… yeah, my ride sort of just left.”

“Oh well, I’m sure Stan can drive you home when he wakes up,” Dina said with a friendly, but clearly shaken smile.

“If he wakes up,” Syd added with a blank look in her eyes.

“SYD, don’t say that!” Dina yelped.

Sydney spoke up, looking at Erin, “Could you give us some privacy for a minute?”

Erin looked around awkwardly, “Uh, yeah. I’ll just… walk to the other side of the parking lot.” As she kicked the pebbles on the ground and watched Dina and Syd in a heated argument, she began to regret staying to help them. She probably could’ve gone home with Kate if she had rushed out like everyone else, but she was with two near strangers nursing another near stranger who was unconscious while the remaining teacher chaperones walked the perimeter of the school trying to see if there was an actual fire.

Erin was pulled out of her thoughts by Syd yelling (which she had never heard the girl do before), “Holy shit, he’s up.”

Erin began to jog back over to them, reading their facial expressions to see if they were done with their chat. Dina looked down at Stan intently, “Hey, buddy. What’s the last thing you remember?”

Stan furrowed his brows for a moment then sputtered out, “Brad… son of a bitch… how did I get out here?”

#fic #ianowt #stanley barber #sydney novak #dina #brad #i am not ok with this netflix #fanfiction #writing

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piracytheorist · 6 years

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A Song for Goodnight

Mama Jones and KnightRook feels, y’all. aka Who needs summaries

AO3 | FFnet

"You'll keep the lantern lit, aye?"

"Aye, love. Worry not for that." Alice caressed her son's forehead softly, brushing away a few stray locks.

Killian's hair, always easier to tame. Nothing like Liam's wild curls.

"Now, would you like a bedtime story? I haven't told you the Big Friendly Giant in a long time..."

"Little Killy, still needing stories to sleep?" Liam's voice was heard from the door. He was peeking his head inside, his grin spread from ear to ear. Her little troublemaker.

"Hush, Liam," she said. "Go back to bed."

He stuck out his tongue at his little brother and left without a second word.

"He's so annoying, Mama."

A sad smile appeared on her lips and she desperately tried to hide it. "I think he's just jealous he doesn't get a bedtime story anymore. You know he loves you, right?"

"Aye," Killian said, dropping his eyes to his chest. "And I love him too. But he's annoying."

Alice brushed her fingers through his hair again, desperate to memorize the feeling of it. She coughed, managing to make it small and keep her mouth closed.

"Mama? Can you sing tonight?"

Her eyes lit up and she turned to him, smiling widely. He hadn't asked of that for some time.

"Any preference, love?"

He only needed to hum the beginning of the melody. Gods above, she was happy she managed to teach him how to sing. She knew it wouldn't be wise to use her own voice now, but his eyes, her eyes, looked so happy and eager to hear her sing...

My young love said to me My mother won't mind And me father won't slight you For your lack of kind

A cough escaped her, and she covered her mouth with her hand.

No blood. Good.

And she stepped away from me And this she did say It will not be long love Till our wedding day

As she took a breath to continue, her throat stung and she coughed. Knowing full well what that entailed, she pulled the handkerchief from her pocket and coughed, drops of blood landing on it.

To her horror, Killian saw the red spots.

"Mama?"

"Not to worry, love. I'll be fine."

His eyebrows furrowed. Damn those brows, he was only eight and his face could be so expressive...

"Close your eyes."

He did, eventually, as she went on with the rest of the song. When she heard a soft snore coming from him, though his face still appeared worried, she leaned forward and kissed his forehead.

“Goodnight, my little sailor,” she said. She then fixed the wick so the flame would be there, enough to give the room some light but safer to leave unattended. She swallowed her cough and ran out of his room, finally giving in to her coughing fit once Killian's door was closed.

Brennan's arms were around her immediately.

"Alice?"

"It's alright." She waved her hand at him and coughed again, spilling blood at the handkerchief. "Oh," she breathed.

"Come, let's get you to bed."

After she was settled, Alice looked at her husband. She couldn't deny that she was scared. Her time was very short, what would become of them? Her boys? How would Brennan fare?

Buried deep down within her was the fear that he wouldn't make it. That he would eventually put his needs above their sons... She always tried to keep that fear hidden where it should be, to not allow Liam and Killian to ever doubt him...

"Brennan, listen to me."

He looked up from her hand, tucked between his, and he stared at her eyes. She wanted to believe what she saw in his eyes were tears, not a trick from the flickering flame of the candle. Or her own weakened eyesight, for that matter.

"Take care of them, will you?"

"Don't talk like that." He brought her hand to his lips and kissed it.

"I need you to promise me," she said weakly, feeling the cough bubble up inside her as tears escaped her eyes.

"I promise. I promise, my love."

There. That should be enough.

She knew her time was coming, yet she couldn't... she had to leave this world with some kind of hope. Deep down she knew it was false, but it was all she had.

She smiled, and closed her eyes.

Brennan felt her hand go limp in both of his. He couldn't hear her labored breathing anymore. He opened his mouth, her name dying on his lips as another worried voice was heard.

"Mama?"

Killian.

"Oh, m'boy..."

"Mama? Is she asleep?" he asked his father as the man walked to the door silently. "What is it? Mama!" he added as he turned to look at his mother's slack form, her bloody handkerchief still held on her hand. "Mama!"

Brennan picked him up and took him away from the door. He shouldn't have seen this...

"Mama!" Killian was crying. Brennan first felt the sobs rocking his son's body before they were heard aloud. He held him close, now away from their bedroom, and Killian clutched onto him with force, as he kept on crying and whispering "Mama... Mama..."

"Papa! Papa, it hurts!"

"Shh... I know, darling, I know..."

Alice cried loudly, tears streaming down her small and already reddened face. "It hurts!"

Killian balanced his daughter better on his lap, allowing her to lean on him while he examined her wounded arm. One slight movement and a shriek from her confirmed his suspicions.

"It's broken, love. Stay still."

"It hurts!" she cried as she sobbed against his shirt.

He balanced her broken arm on his left one as his hand caressed her head softly. "It's gonna be alright. It's alright. We'll fix it, aye?"

Her response was only choked sobs.

"We'll fix it. We'll make the pain go away. But... but..." He swallowed hard. It was never easy to announce his leaving. "I need to bring a doctor here."

"No! No, don't leave me, please, Papa!"

"I'll be back faster than ever, we need to fix your arm..." he tried, but his own voice betrayed his reluctance to leave.

"No! Don't leave! Use the magic!"

He closed his eyes and bit his lip. The leftover petal had done its work many a time he'd found himself at a loss, but from the looks of it he guessed it was nearing its end. If there even was enough magic left to heal her, it would probably not suffice for anything else.

"Please! Use the magic, Papa. Don't leave me."

He knew that the sob accompanying her pleas wasn't only because of the injury. Tears stung at his eyes - much like every time he had to leave - and he bent his head, kissing her soft blonde locks.

"I won't. I'll stay," he said softly, a small sigh escaping. "Let me fetch the petal."

She sniffled and stepped down, crying out as the movement jostled at her arm and he felt like he was being stabbed himself. It wasn't the first time she got injured like that, and he guessed it would always feel as bad as the first time. He took the petal and breathed deeply, hoping against hope this wasn't its end.

He held it above Alice's arm, rubbed at it with his fingers and bright yellow dust started falling from it, right where a bruise was forming. In seconds, a snapping sound was heard and the bruise disappeared, as a smile appeared on Alice's face.

It was short-lived, however, as her face fell when she saw the petal wither completely, now a dead, dry thing.

She put her arms behind her back. "I'm sorry, Papa."

He set the petal down on the table. "Be sorry that you jumped from so up high. Don't be sorry you're feeling better, see?" He brought her arm in front with his hook and tapped at the previously injured place with his fingers, turning to tickling as they went up her arm and shoulder. Alice shrieked a laughter, always a loud one, and pulled away with a smile.

"I won't jump from so high again. I promise." Her face was down, however, as she said that. "Is there not another flower?"

He swallowed as he thought. There was always a possibility another one had grown... But the garden was far away from the closest village and any trek that didn't guarantee supplies wasn't worth risking leaving his five-year-old rascal alone. Although, another source of magic for help would be very precious to both of them... And for different reasons for each one.

He bent down on one knee to look her in the eye. "If you promise me you'll stay put, and you'll be careful to not get hurt again, I may find some time to go search for another one." She nodded vigorously. "I don't know if I'll even find one," he said, holding up his hand to stop her, "but I can look."

"Can't you buy one? What if you get hurt?"

He smiled at her. "I'll be fine."

"Yeah," she said, frowning, "because you can leave and go find a doctor!" Her eyebrows started to furrow.

"It's not that. Do you remember what I told you about this?" He held up his hook. On their own, his lips pursed together and his voice went lower. "That I lost it during a mighty fight with a crocodile!" he said with emphasis as he pointed at the hook with his hand. Keeping his lips pursed and his one eyebrow raised, he turned towards her, and she giggled. "Any other harm that may come upon me, I shall fight it valiantly!" he said and laid his open palm on his chest as he puffed it, earning another giggle from Alice.

"And I will help you, Papa! I'll fight with you!" she said with a wide grin and threw her arms around him, blocking half of his view with her wild curls. He hugged her back, leaving a kiss at the side of her head, relaxed to see her previously happy mood come back. She was always unpredictable, swinging from one mood to another without warning. Of course, he couldn't blame her.

But him making funny faces and noises on purpose always seemed to put a smile on her face.

"Now, it's late. Let's get you to bed," he said and picked her up, going for her bed.

"Mmm." She snuggled on his shoulder, her arms going a little slack. He leaned forward and she flopped dramatically on the bed, sticking out her tongue at him.

"Knackered, are we? Which story do you want today?" He sat at the side of the bed and covered her with her favourite blanket.

"I don't want a story today. Will you sing?"

His eyes lit up. She'd never told him to not sing or stop while he'd been doing that, but it was the first time she asked for it. "Of course, love. What song would you like?"

"That one with the 'moved through the fair'."

He couldn't help the smile, nor the slight melancholy inside. He knew she loved that song, it was after all, the one she'd heard the most. His hand went up to brush the always messy curls away from her face, and he began singing.

My young love said to me...

#what up #KnightRook #KnightRook ff #Wish Hook #Alice Jones #Alice Jones I #piracytheorist writes

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spaceorphan18 · 7 years

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SO’S GLEE EPISODE RANKING: NO. 11

I started a Full Glee Episode Ranking between seasons 5 and 6 over two years ago now (!!!). My opinions have changed somewhat since then (retrospect is an interesting thing), and I need to include the thirteen season six episodes I neglected in my original list. With the two year anniversary of the show being over a few months away, I thought I’d count down to by posting an episode every day. I’ll tag using: glee episode rankings

Here we go…

11. The Quarterback (5x03)

Written by: Ryan Murphy, Brad Falchuk, Ian Brennan and Lea Michele Directed by: Brad Falchuk

Oh The Quarterback. This episode is getting my honorary 11th spot. Because my top ten are episodes that if I was stranded on a desert island for the rest of my life, those would be the ten episodes that I’d want with me. But -- if I were making an objective list of episodes based on production value, impact, cohesiveness, and message this episode would take one of the top spots. I don’t watch it very often (I don’t have an attachment to Finn or Cory the way others do), but when I do, I’m always blown away by what a powerful episode this is.

The thing is -- this episode is about grief, and how all of these different characters are dealing with their personal grief and reaction to Finn’s death. It’s very touching, and very moving, and I think the show did a great job paying respects to Finn and to Cory.

High Points:

Again, it’s hard to articulate high points with an episode like this, but I’m sure you guys know what I mean.

Kurt (Chris) really steps up into the leading man role in this episode, and is (more or less) throughout the rest of the series. His arc here is amazing to watch, as his grief is personal, but very much there, while meanwhile he becomes the pillar of strength for everyone else around him.

Romy Rosemont’s acting in this episode. Her heartbreak as a mom who’s lost her son is amazing, and perhaps the best performance on the show. The scene with Kurt, Burt, and Carole is my favorite in the episode.

Puck’s grief in this actually makes me feel for him. I’m glad he finds solace with Beiste, and him joining the army was the best way to send off the character. (I was surprised when he came back in season 6 -- as this episode wraps up his character in a nice way.)

Santana’s anger. Because this episode is amazing when it shows just how many ways people deal with grief.

The idea that the line between the dates is your life.

Rachel and Will’s scene at the end is very touching.

Controversial opinion of the day - these events sent the show off on a different trajectory, and, as tragic as Cory and Finn’s death was, and wish it hadn’t happened, I don’t necessarily think that a new story trajectory was the worst thing.

Low Points:

While I have some minor, minor issues from an artistic point of view (some of the understandably not-so-great acting (Mark), or the fact that Will keeps that jacket) the fact that this episode exists at all is the real low point.

Music:

Seasons of Love: They originally did this one for season 3′s Goodbye, and then scrapped it. Idk why. But I’m glad that it’s used here. It’s a fantastic use of the ensemble, and always makes me tear up a little.

I’ll Stand By You: Mercedes’s rendition of this one is just gorgeous.

Fire and Rain: Artie and Sam sing this one, and it’s meloncholy and sentimental in a way that works very well for the episode.

If I Die Young: While not my favorite Santana solo (I’m sorry!) it does a great job of capturing Santana’s emotion that she’s going through in the episode.

No Surrender: Puck’s solo - which sounds good and is perfect for the character.

Make You Feel My Love: One of the best solos that Rachel had on the show. Her best work is when there’s real emotion behind the singing.

Final Verdict: Not only is this a pitch perfect tribute to Cory Monteith, it’s a fantastic and heartwrenching look at grief and how it manifests differently in different people. On top of that, on a production level, it’s one of the best episodes the show ever produced.

#glee episode rankings

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