#idk man i know it's body dysmorphic disorder. i know.

[autumnhobbit]

.

#would give anything to have smaller arms #no rolls #a sharp jawline like i had for a little bit #g*d my collarbone was visible in my old pics from 2018-2020 and it shouldn't bother me but it does so so.much #i don't know what my problem is #i don't know what i expect #on the one hand i feel like its genuinely not normal to lose some daily activity and immediately gain 40-50 lbs #bc like it didnt happen to me the first time i was jobless for like nine months #but on the other hand i'm like. my mom is fat my grandma has been fat for most of her life #my grandfather's mother was stocky and according to my mom she didn't have 'a single thin aunt' #but it's constant and clothes torment me and a lot of the time i can't stand to look at my face or body #and i even cheat myself out of the rare times i do feel okay about it by comparing how i actually look to how i want to look #or think i /ought/ to look #and honestly i still don't understand how anyone tolerates me and sometimes don't believe zach can genuinely be attracted to me #(even though i know he is.) #fuck. #idk man i know it's body dysmorphic disorder. i know. #mom only thinks its not a real thing bc she has it too. #but it's so hard to maybe accept that i'm not ugly #or even if i am i don't deserve to have that fact torment me my whole life #like i have eyes?? i can see me? i know i look horrid? #and i don't want to forgive myself and tell myself its ok i look like this. #i hate how i look. i hate how i feel. but i just toss it back and forth in circles in my head ad infinitum #and drive myself insane wanting peace with my body and self #and never getting it.

[kirby-dalziel]

soon I'll come around  Lost and never found 

ajax, stuck in foul legacy form the rest of his life, now older

body image mention in the readmore lol

y’all i can’t tell you how fucking validating this was to draw and finally clean up and color...

bscly my entire family has an eating or body dysmorphic disorder and i thought i got off scott free for the longest time but uh, one time my dad made a comment on my weight when he was visiting me after i moved out, then i had a doctor obsess over my weight to the point of ignoring the other issues that were actually pressing that i wanted to look into (u know, like being unable to fucking breathe well and being fatigued more than is apparently normal, since i was a twig of a child) and all that kind of messed me up really bad

and writing/drawing ajax as fat in the hellspawn fic and dealing with a lot of the same health problems i am, post permanent abyss beast transformation has done more to help me be ok with my weight and see myself as attractive than fucking anything else i’ve tried LOL

hyperfixation is a weird thing y’all

idk man. i feel a really awful sense of dread for the immediate future and wanted to get some angst out

#foul legacy #my art #really personal art lol #childe #tartaglia genshin impact #foul legacy no return #foul legacy transformation #k but. kaeya kissing his abdomen and laying his head on him when they snuggle #he likes to listen to him purring that way #it's just a warm all encompassing rumble that way

[ao3feed-dadzawa]

A Crack in Porcelain

A Crack In Porcelain by thatanon1

“She's a boney little thing, isn't she?” Her mom talks too quickly, and Ochako frowns, curling her hand around her narrow wrist, feeling the bone popping out beneath her finger. Is that normal?

“No, no,” the doctor says, and he sounds nice again when he smiles at Ochako, which makes her grin back widely. She hopes that he notices the gap between her teeth when she sticks her tongue through it, because her mom said that losing a tooth means she's growing up, and that's a very important thing for a young lady to do. “Some little ones just have those fast metabolisms, right? They're growing fast, alright. Count me jealous.”

Or: Uraraka Ochako is five, and she realizes that she's too thin, too ugly. She's eight, and she's told that her body is wrong and fat, too ugly. She's twelve, and she's told that she weighs too much, too muscular for a girl, too ugly.

She's fifteen, and she finally learns that maybe, it doesn't matter what her body looks like, because she matters either way.

(PLEASE READ THE TAGS/AUTHOR'S NOTES FOR WARNINGS)

Words: 3648, Chapters: 1/3, Language: English

Fandoms: 僕のヒーローアカデミア | Boku no Hero Academia | My Hero Academia

Rating: Mature

Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings

Categories: Gen

Characters: Uraraka Ochako, Uraraka Ochako's Parents, Uraraka Ochako's Family, Aizawa Shouta | Eraserhead, Midoriya Izuku, Original Characters, Asui Tsuyu

Relationships: Aizawa Shouta | Eraserhead & Uraraka Ochako, Midoriya Izuku & Uraraka Ochako, Uraraka Ochako & Everyone, Uraraka Ochako & Original Character(s)

Additional Tags: Not Beta Read, Eating Disorders, Child Abuse, possibly?, idk man, Sexual Harassment, None Of This Is Romanticized, Self-Hatred, Uraraka Ochako-centric, Implied Childhood Sexual Abuse, it's not shown, vent fic, Food Issues, Additional Warnings In Author's Note, Parental Aizawa Shouta | Eraserhead, Hurt/Comfort, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Gaslighting, probably, yall idek, Non-Consensual Touching, Body Dysmorphic Disorder, Maybe - Freeform, dont diagnose yourselves yall, i wrote this when i was like thirteen, Crying, Self-Esteem Issues, Self Confidence Issues, please do not read if this could be triggering, ill beat your ass, Body Shaming, Separation Anxiety, none of these are meant to be accurate portrayals, I Don't Even Know, the names for these disorders, Platonic Cuddling, Child Uraraka Ochako, In the Beginning, Time Skips

Read Here: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26342209

#AO3 Feed #FanFiction #AO3 Dadzawa #♦ #Aizawa Shouta #Ochako Uraraka #R:M #A:Thatanon1 #Dadzawa #Abuse #Hurt Comfort

[ao3feed-bnha-girls]

A Crack in Porcelain

A Crack In Porcelain by thatanon1

“She's a boney little thing, isn't she?” Her mom talks too quickly, and Ochako frowns, curling her hand around her narrow wrist, feeling the bone popping out beneath her finger. Is that normal?

“No, no,” the doctor says, and he sounds nice again when he smiles at Ochako, which makes her grin back widely. She hopes that he notices the gap between her teeth when she sticks her tongue through it, because her mom said that losing a tooth means she's growing up, and that's a very important thing for a young lady to do. “Some little ones just have those fast metabolisms, right? They're growing fast, alright. Count me jealous.”

Or: Uraraka Ochako is five, and she realizes that she's too thin, too ugly. She's eight, and she's told that her body is wrong and fat, too ugly. She's twelve, and she's told that she weighs too much, too muscular for a girl, too ugly.

She's fifteen, and she finally learns that maybe, it doesn't matter what her body looks like, because she matters either way.

(PLEASE READ THE TAGS/AUTHOR'S NOTES FOR WARNINGS)

Words: 3648, Chapters: 1/3, Language: English

Fandoms: 僕のヒーローアカデミア | Boku no Hero Academia | My Hero Academia

Rating: Mature

Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings

Categories: Gen

Characters: Uraraka Ochako, Uraraka Ochako's Parents, Uraraka Ochako's Family, Aizawa Shouta | Eraserhead, Midoriya Izuku, Original Characters, Asui Tsuyu

Relationships: Aizawa Shouta | Eraserhead & Uraraka Ochako, Midoriya Izuku & Uraraka Ochako, Uraraka Ochako & Everyone, Uraraka Ochako & Original Character(s)

Additional Tags: Not Beta Read, Eating Disorders, Child Abuse, possibly?, idk man, Sexual Harassment, None Of This Is Romanticized, Self-Hatred, Uraraka Ochako-centric, Implied Childhood Sexual Abuse, it's not shown, vent fic, Food Issues, Additional Warnings In Author's Note, Parental Aizawa Shouta | Eraserhead, Hurt/Comfort, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Gaslighting, probably, yall idek, Non-Consensual Touching, Body Dysmorphic Disorder, Maybe - Freeform, dont diagnose yourselves yall, i wrote this when i was like thirteen, Crying, Self-Esteem Issues, Self Confidence Issues, please do not read if this could be triggering, ill beat your ass, Body Shaming, Separation Anxiety, none of these are meant to be accurate portrayals, I Don't Even Know, the names for these disorders, Platonic Cuddling, Child Uraraka Ochako, In the Beginning, Time Skips

Read Here: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26342209

#AO3 Feed #FanFiction #AO3 Ochako #♠ #Ochako Uraraka #Aizawa Shouta #Izuku Midoriya #🎈 #R:M #A:Thatanon1 #Dadzawa #Abuse #Hurt Comfort

[ao3feed-aizawashouta]

by thatanon1

“She’s a boney little thing, isn’t she?” Her mom talks too quickly, and Ochako frowns, curling her hand around her narrow wrist, feeling the bone popping out beneath her finger. Is that normal?

“No, no,” the doctor says, and he sounds nice again when he smiles at Ochako, which makes her grin back widely. She hopes that he notices the gap between her teeth when she sticks her tongue through it, because her mom said that losing a tooth means she’s growing up, and that’s a very important thing for a young lady to do. “Some little ones just have those fast metabolisms, right? They’re growing fast, alright. Count me jealous.”

Or: Uraraka Ochako is five, and she realizes that she's too thin, too ugly. She's eight, and she's told that her body is wrong and fat, too ugly. She's twelve, and she's told that she weighs too much, too muscular for a girl, too ugly.

She's fifteen, and she finally learns that maybe, it doesn't matter what her body looks like, because she matters either way.

(PLEASE READ THE TAGS/AUTHOR'S NOTES FOR WARNINGS)

Words: 3648, Chapters: 1/3, Language: English

Fandoms: 僕のヒーローアカデミア | Boku no Hero Academia | My Hero Academia

Rating: Mature

Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings

Categories: Gen

Characters: Uraraka Ochako, Uraraka Ochako's Parents, Uraraka Ochako's Family, Aizawa Shouta | Eraserhead, Midoriya Izuku, Original Characters, Asui Tsuyu

Relationships: Aizawa Shouta | Eraserhead & Uraraka Ochako, Midoriya Izuku & Uraraka Ochako, Uraraka Ochako & Everyone, Uraraka Ochako & Original Character(s)

Additional Tags: Not Beta Read, Eating Disorders, Child Abuse, possibly?, idk man, Sexual Harassment, None Of This Is Romanticized, Self-Hatred, Uraraka Ochako-centric, Implied Childhood Sexual Abuse, it's not shown, vent fic, Food Issues, Additional Warnings In Author's Note, Parental Aizawa Shouta | Eraserhead, Hurt/Comfort, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Gaslighting, probably, yall idek, Non-Consensual Touching, Body Dysmorphic Disorder, Maybe - Freeform, dont diagnose yourselves yall, i wrote this when i was like thirteen, Crying, Self-Esteem Issues, Self Confidence Issues, please do not read if this could be triggering, ill beat your ass, Body Shaming, Separation Anxiety, none of these are meant to be accurate portrayals, I Don't Even Know, the names for these disorders, Platonic Cuddling, Child Uraraka Ochako, In the Beginning, Time Skips

#aizawa shouta #aizawa shota #eraserhead #bnha #boku no hero academia #my hero academia #mha #fanfic