#i. bellamy blake / metas ↠ i'm a goner somebody catch my breath

[athisagony]

            a     prisoner     of     war.     is     this     his     destiny          ?          a     fate     he     is     always     doomed     to     succumb     to          ?         on     the     ark     ,     on     the     ground.     hell     ,     jaha     was     mere     child’s     play     compared     to     the     enemies     they     face     now.     bellamy     can     feel     his     confidence     beginning     to     slip     with     each     rattle     of     his     chains     ,          ━━           octavia’s     initiative     the     only     minor     inkling     of     hope     he     can     cling     to.             ❛           on     your     feet.           ❜             mindlessly          ━━           he     obeys.     roan          &          his     minions     prepared     to     do     whatever     it     takes     to     survive     ,     to     carelessly     murder     skaikru     in     the     process.             o     will     find     a     way.             o     will     find     a     way.             O     WILL     FIND     A     WAY.             tightened     jaw     releases     ,     enough     to     remind     them     :          ❛           octavia     will     get     there     first.           ❜           they     pause     ,     listening     to     him     ,     possibly     pondering     how     ludicrous     their     plan     is.     he     can     feel     his     confidence     building     the     longer     their     silence     lasts.          ❛           she’ll     warn     them     you’re     coming.     you’ll     lose.           ❜                       dispirited     ,     almost     regretful     eyes     meet     his          &          before     he     has     a     chance     to     process     ,     metal     collides     with     cement          ━━           he     feels     his     confidence     diminish.     daggers          ━━           his     sister’s     daggers.          ❛           no     ,           ❜           he     shakes     his     head     in     denial     ,     silently     pleading     for     refuge     from     the     overwhelming     emotions     swallowing     him     whole.             tears     threaten     to     spill          &          digits     coil     around     the     metal     bars     of     the     cell.     he     looks     away     ,     he     refuses     to     face     them     ,     he     will     not     let     them     see     that     they’ve     succeeded     in     breaking     him     ,     in     shattering     his     very     being.     knees     begin     to     buckle          &          he     sinks     to     the     cement     ,     screams     of     agonizing     denial     ripping     from     arid     lips.     members     of     azgeda     peel     a     broken     man     from     weeping     on     the     dirty     surface     of     the     cement     ,     dragging     him     away     like     a     rag     doll          &          he     complies     ,     he     submits     ,     he     surrenders.             one     promise     made     to     his     mother.             one     code     to     live     by     :     protect     your     sister     ,     bellamy.             &          he     failed.     he     failed     to     save     his     mother     from     being     floated          &          he     wasn’t     there     to     shield     octavia     from     .     .     .     enduring     the     same     fate.             may     we     meet     again     .     .     .             he     isn’t     a     hero.     he’s     a     sham.             there’s     nothing     left.     he     has     nothing.     he     is     nothing.

#i. bellamy blake / character study ↠ wanted to be a better adversary to the evil I have done #ii. verses / season 4 ↠ we didn't survive this long just to let a little radiation take us out #i. bellamy blake / metas ↠ i'm a goner somebody catch my breath #i. bellamy blake / drabbles ↠ i wanted to be a better brother better son #ii. dynamics / bellamy / octavia ↠ my sister my responsibility #forever weepy #over this #:heartbreak: #/ grief