#i'm literally on the verge of tears rn and trying not to have an anxiety attack

[da-proti-toku-grem]

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#i'm seriously starting to considering quiting uni and i've not even been here for 2 month yet #seriously why am i like this #i'm literally on the verge of tears rn and trying not to have an anxiety attack #and just because my chemistry teacher told us that we have to do some shit for a presentation in december #just thinking about all the stuff i have to do for december makes me want to cry #and 90% of it is the week after my concert #and i already feel like shit because i'm going to a f*cking concert instead of studying #also i don't like almost anything we're doing up to this point #and i keep telling myself that maybe it's because it's the first year and we are doing more 'basic' things #so maybe i'll like more stuff in the next years #but it seems more unlikely everyday #and i can't stop thinking that maybe i chose the wrong career #i know that's not the end of the world but i can't help but think that i've been wasting my time #and that i had such a bad time last year just to be able to get into this career only to not like it now that i'm in #also idk what i would do if i actually quit because this was honestly the only thing i thought i might like #it's just so frustrating and idk what to do #so i'm here writing this rant in the middle of class trying not to cry in front of 60 people #and feeling even worse because i'm not paying enough attention #istg i think that the only thing keeping me sane rn is this fandom #i'm very grateful for all of you who put up with me every day :( #venting #maca speaks