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#i would eat this shit outta that
mikeyswayy · 1 month
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WHY ARE PEOPLE BEING SO FUCKING RUDE ABOUT HIS BREAD,
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ITS FUCKING BEAUTIFUL, YALL ARE SO RUDE 😭
I WANNA SEE YALL TRY AND MAKE THAT, MAKE SOMETHING BETTER
FUCK YALL, ITS BEAUTIFUL 😭😭
WHAT IF HE SEES YOUR GUYS FUCKING COMMENTS ABT IT⁉️
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weirdmageddon · 8 months
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sorry for liking davejade in 2023 btw its in a cool way though
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#hs#davejade#like that one person said bi4bi cool silly girl and her lame ass court jester bf who enjoy each others company a lot#“its boring” well not everything has to be conflict sometimes it can be two people really vibing#and being good foils to each other and just sort of being like a lock and key#i dont dislike davekat but i felt like they bickered too much which is Funny dont get me wrong#but i like davejade for different reasons#in that i feel like dave is at his most heartfelt with her#bc jade doesnt do anything to warrant snarkiness. she doesnt make him uncomfortable and that earns his trust like a lot#ppl say its boring cause its a mf ship and they dont get them like i do#and my answer to that as an agender person is who the fuck cares#i hate ppl dismissing mf ships out of hand like…hey bi ppl exist. and even if they were straight they still got a good dynamic#of care and interest towards each other#hes not her knight in shining armor bffr. she has uhhh fucking GUN#they are Equals#jade slaps the shit outta people on more than one occasion lol#they infodump to EACH OTHER and they both listen#remember when jade wanted to infodump to john about physics remember that#dave would eat that up like oh damn that so dope and tie it back to time or whatever. special relativity#since space and time are fundamentally related#sorry im running on fumes rn i didnt sleep last night#ALSO THEY HAVE MATCHING ALCHEMIZED OUTFITS#jade’s dead shuffle dress and dave’s four aces suited both use a midnight crew poster as ingredients#i should draw them together in that mspa style#maybe theyre not even romantic. who said ships had to be. its short for relationship#well theres multiple kinds of relationships. what if they were queerplatonic
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crowcryptds · 11 months
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🐓 bok bok!
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i learned tablet weaving over a few days using pieces of a cereal box, embroidery floss, and the yt video ‘tablet weaving for the absolute beginner’ from elewys of finchingefeld, 10/10 absolutely worth it highly recommend
(also your loom weaving pieces are always gorgeous and I adore seeing them!)
YOU ARE ENABLING MEEEEEeeeee I absolutely love learning any new facets of fibercraft. With the exception of tatting and serious embroidery, which I live In Constant Fear Of.
Thank you!!! I've been loving sharing all of my creations, and you all are so sweet??? It's been so rewarding!
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autism-alley · 3 months
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made something to snack on for watching the finale :)
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#pjo show#percy jackson show#percy jackson and the olympians#percy jackson and the olympians show#ris raves#half were regular cookies half were cake mix cookies bc i’ve never made those before#turned out rly good!!#used purple food gel to neutralize the yellow then obviously used blue#the purple also darkened it as i tried to make both batches the same shade of blue eventually i just had 2 stop b4 they turned black lmao#also if u bake anything. get u some vanilla bean paste i tell everybody i know#also!! use that fucken salted butter. ‘sprinkle salt on ur cookies’ no!! bake that shit in there w the butter#kerrygold butter i <3 u#it’s been a while since i’ve had chocolate chip cookies so eating these fresh outta the oven like. i get it#i get why this is what percy would imagine the drink of the gods would taste like#i’ve never felt more like perseus jackson than that moment#only thing that compares is first time i had coffee#i was so fucking sleep deprived my mom handed me one of those bottled dunkin donuts iced coffees w so much sugar#and my sleep deprived brain was like ‘this is ice cream. this is coffee ice cream as a drink this is the nectar of the gods’#like no shit dumbass coffee tastes like the ice cream flavor modeled after it#anyways lmao who’s excited for the finale#despite my thoughts on the show itself i am excited. i am in my chb shirt and wearing my annabeth camp beads#did my nails to try 2 match the og lightning thief cover#i will be munching on my blue cookies and if it is upsetting i will be throwing them at my screen#maybe
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mars-ipan · 5 months
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genuinely if i were in crowley’s position i would not have been able to go 6000 years without saying anything. like yeah yeah survival and all that but if someone i knew for that long kept looking at me like That i would not have been able to pretend it wasn’t happening
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imwritesometimes · 11 months
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feels like sometimes you just gotta accept some ppl wanna stay miserable forever cause it's what they know and they don't see how they could ever live anything different and fire up the sims and fuckin put your jams on and fuckin be at peace with the happiness you've been able to carve out of the shit show you were handed because you realized life isn't actually all bullshit even if it's tiny things you got to keep you a little happy....
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snekdood · 2 months
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i hope every squirrel that tries to dig in my pots gets poked by the rusty fuckin chicken wire and gets tetanus and dies 😌😌😌😌😌😌🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏
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memorimoss · 9 months
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What if i got a vertical labret 👁👁
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railmerosalie · 6 months
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I find it so funny when ppl say that Katniss has no personality, she's so cute and funny! Like do you not remember when she...
1. Thought Finnick was making out with Peetas corpse and was like "damn didn't know he was fruity like that"
2. When Gale confessed his love for her and she was STRIAGHT up like "yeah I know" 💀
3. Saw Peeta had been crying after the first reaping and immediately thinks "damn he's good, playing the weak sympathy card". Like girl he thinks he's gonna die! He's gonna die!
4. Katniss and Finnick wearing the green face cream in CF and scaring the fuck outta Peeta on the beach
5. Just her and Haymitch, especially the first book
6. "I decided to go ahead and like Boggs" - thanks for letting us know queen 👑
7. In MJ when they're trying to film the propos, and she's just horrible at it
8. In the first book when she's trying to drain the pus out of Peetas leg and she just so goddmaned grossed out
9. Saw the cupcakes at the Capitol party and immediately thought that Peeta would love the frosting details
10. In MJ when Gale and Peeta are talking about Katniss choosing one of them, she's just like "gonna leave you two bums here, don't need this shit"
11. Everytime she was unaware of people flirting with her or just being nice. She always think there's some hidden motive... like girl they're your family and friends, they just like you as a person
12. "Nobody needs me" "I do, I need you". Katniss finally admitting her love for Peeta and realises that she can't live without him!! It's such an important part of her growth towards Peeta and no one talks about it!! The girl how has survived everything finally needs not just something, but SOMEONE. And it's HIM (I'm so normal about this I swear)
13. Sassying buttercup at every turn
14. She has the same vibe as goop from Meet The Robinsons (especially with Madge). "Hey Katniss, wanna eat lunch together?" "Hey Katniss, wanna go for a walk into town later"
She's there like:
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badolmen · 1 year
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Blehg
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nonuify · 15 days
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ᝰ.ᐟ ♟️ — SVT ; ! top 3 things they’d love in sex.
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nsfw is included ! minors do not interact 18+.
CHOI SEUNGCHEOL ;
- a size kink with a bulge kink. especially manhandling you with his arms like damn oh my godddd, fuckin you till you see his cock poking under your belly button </3
- dacryphilia, seeing you fucked out and you balling your eyes out omg, sometimes him being a meanie to you and just slapping your bum to see those pretty little tears makes him go feral.
- a bondage kink, doesn’t have to be too extreme loves tying you up and seeing dolled up for him weither just a simple silk around your hands or pretty ropes restraining your whole body.
YOON JEONGHAN ;
- edging, it’s a big turn on for him & you imagine him denying you so many times he would smirk at himself proud of the look of his pretty lover trembling and begging to cum.
- degradation, yeahh he’s a menace lol he would just degrade you till your a crying mess, and oh my god dumbfiction with it?? like imagine whispering in your ear“fuck my pretty dumb little slut all fucked out f’me huh”. he would also like receiving it fastest to way to get into his pants.
- corruption, ugh he will get a boner instantly if you are (or act) clueless about smth dirty, loves the feeling of it. like the first time you were riding him, you overwhelmed bc you thought you didn’t do good but he was a moaning mess of how cluelessly innocent you were abt it
HONG JISOO ;
- praising turned into degrading. I have a vision of him being like so soft but turning into the biggest meanie help me like?? praising you so lovingly till you made him jealous or something then get ready to be crying the whole night loving every single bit of it.
- breeding kink. uhmm the thought of you bearing his children yes please. man’s dirty talk about pumping his kids in you is craaazy “shit wanna see you all full of my cum hmm?? leaving my cum dripping out of you baby”.
- boob play. worshipping your tits is on top of his list even if it’s not smut related he loves getting squished between your boobies lolol.
WEN JUNHUI ;
- marking. thought of you all in purplish love bites by him makes him go through it help. he loves marking your boobs, thighs, neck you name it you have a hickey/bite in it
- creampie. even after cumming in you once he will keep coming till he sees his pretty semen leaking outta you & you know you will keep it there even if you wear panties or head out somewhere.
- dry humping. stop imagine you begging him to fuck you and lets you dry hump on his thigh he would be cocky and flex his thigh to make electricity shoot through you, or he would thrust in you with clothes on tease you wet little cunt on his clothed cock.
KWAN SOONYOUNG ;
- pegging. lol big take but he LOVES when you peg him he was a little hesitant at first but was obsessed when you guys tried it.
- blowjob/eating out. him being stressed all it takes is a blowjob from you to make his day better. even if it’s in work, or the house or anywhere if he’s hard you’ll gladly drop your knees for him lol, and don’t get me started he loves eating you out like it’s his last meal man is dedicated to let you squirt all over his face.
- roleplay. he would totally let you wear a tiger plug help me… when you wiggle your ass for him GOD. he would go crazy. “ who’s my pretty little tiger” as he leaved kisses all over your face.
JEON WONWOO ;
- bodyworship. he would worship your body so bad like kissing every curv & inch of you, man is so obsessed with you inside and out. get buckled up to feel his mouth everywhere, he would kiss you slowly as foreplay to rile you up ( it will work.)
- lingerie. he absolutely adores when you wear a pretty lingerie, lacy or not he will fuck the daylights you and rip it apart & buy you another one and repeat. or when you bend over and your cute little panties show oh the the raging boner he’s having at the sight of it ugh.
praising. he loves receiving and giving praises to his lover he finds it so delicate and soothing while making love to compliment how well you’re doing for him or when you tell him how much you love him it’s so sweet and means a lot.
special mention ; loves when you moan out his name may make him cum instantly
LEE JIHOON ;
- exhibitionism. not literally just he loves fucking you in his studio with the thought of someone hearing how good he’s fucking you?? god he gets so excited when he does it.
- orgasm denial. riling you up when you guys have a quickie then when you’re about to cum he leaves you there teasing you & causing you to be a brat then fucks you the whole night till the morning cuz yeah lolol but he really loves torturing you till you beg him to let you cum ( he loves hearing you beg )
- cock warming. ugh just the thought of uji cock warming you till he’s done with his work. you be rlly sulky about & what does he do when you whine? spank your ass. but he’s so touchy tho :(( he’ll rub your waist and give you kisses alot !!
LEE SEOKMIN ;
- choking. he loves fucking you while having his pretty hands on you, ( you will love it too duh hand kink ) but not actually pressing hard just a little bit of pressure ugh it’s a work of art having you fucked out in tears & cum on your face then him choking you.
- face sitting. when he tells you to sit on his face you SIT ON it. he’s so pussy drunk he loves loves loves it when you do it omg will give u a spank here in there boy will go hours eating your cunt out.
- dirty talk. his dirty talk game is crazy you cum untouched by his dirty talk alone like?? “gonna fuck you so good when we go home & won’t still till I have you shaking angel” he whispers to you in a dinner with the members and goes all smiley
KIM MINGYU ;
- size kink. duh we’ve seen this coming. he totally loves pinning your arms up your head & sees the difference between your little hand compared to his. loves to manhandle you & fuck your brains out till cock drunk. when you tell him “y-your so big min” will make him go even harder & faster.
- mirror kink. fucking you infront of a mirror is a wet dream when he does it in real life it’s 10000x better. loves seeing his cock sucked up by your tight cunt, “mm look at me when I cum in your baby”.
- blindfolds. you get so whiny about it and he gets so turned on when he seees his lover desperate to see him also loves teasing you by surprising by dragging his cock against you till it’s tip’s teasing your hole.
XU MINGHAO ;
bondage. like cheol but more sophisticated finds it so arousing seeing you squirm under the ropes he so delicately tightened around your skin till it’s red. he also loves when he sees the remains of the rope leaving your skin & kisses it.
ass-worship . Idk why but man is so obsessed with your ass like?? he loves to spank it till it’s red might even bite it & if he’s feeling it he’ll eat it.
hair-pulling. receiving it mostly. adores when you tug roughly on his hair he just lets out loud moan. but will also pull yours when he tells you to look at him & you don’t ??? he’ll pull it to look at him which you absolutely love.
BOO SEUNGKWAN ;
- gagging. gagging him with your panties or a gag yes pls he might as well cum when you do that, or when he sees you stuffed with his tie oh my god it’s his pleasure to see that.
- riding him. the sight of you bouncing on his cock man does he love it, your cute tittes bouncing while you throw your head at how much good the feeling is. he’ll slap & grab your tittes till they’re swollen.
- sex toys. okok imagine him having a remote controller for your vibrator while you guys are out & he turns it up or when he’s feeling cocky in bed n masturbating his cock. you with the vibrator is in you after 2 orgasms ugh :(
CHWE HANSOL ;
- spit kink. he may seem oh sweet. no. he’s not. he’s the nastiest omg & you’d be so whipped like “open your mouth f’me sweets” he’ll spit & you’ll swallow like the good girl you are.
- music. idk but music seems like it’s a must like a sweet sensual song for you guys to fuck in seems so hot to him likeee my man is such a romantic.
- fingering. loves adores fingering you. sitting in his lap while he plunges his fingers into you stretching you out while giggling being too much a tease. he would probs eat your cum after letting you cum.
LEE CHAN
- foreplay. oh my lord his fore-play IS CRAZY. rubbing your clit or pressing on it while he leaves open mouth kisses all overt your face & your just so cute begging him to fuck you while he’s in his little world.
- daddy kink. being the youngest in the group then his lover saying daddy to him?? b o n e r alert. will bend you over & fuck you lol.
- boob job. he loves cumming all over your boobs wow. seeing your face full with his cum dripping on your boobs too damn. when he sees you scooping his semen n eating it?? god he’ll fuck you into oblivion so fast.
! 𝜗𝜚˚⋆ thank you for reading >ᴗ< !! these are ofc not accurate it’s just my takes on them 🫶🏻
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wysteria-bloom · 1 month
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⚝ " i'll never smile again "
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The hazbin boys are visibly stressed
Warnings : I used female pronouns. There are mentions of Valentino. Highly suggestive in Vox's part because yeah it makes sense. Alastor offers to go on a murderous rampage with the reader 🥰
Genre : Fluff, suggestive
A/n : I hate the people in my life and they stress me tf out so I'm writing to vent my frustrations out. :) I only included my favs in this one but if you would like a part two with other characters then say the word.
Characters : Alastor, Vox, Lucifer
▢ vox ᯤ
- Offering sexual favours -
Vox growled to himself gently as he typed away at the screen in front of him, eyes honing in obsessively on the words and news articles.
He was on media control right now because fucking Val blew up on Angel in public today.
Now he's forced to get rid of every media that is sculpting Valentino out to be the bad guy.
Whoopee fucking doo.
"Fuckin' Val... stupid idiot.... stupidly hot idiot." He sighed out, running his hands down his face tiredly then his eyes widened with an idea,"... Where's my assistant."
"Here, sir."
"Fuckin' christ-!" He yelped out at the sudden voice and he spun around quickly in his chair, coming face to face with her amused little shit-eating grin. He glared, scowl on his lips," You been there the whole time?"
"Yes, sir." She nodded, hands folded in her lap modestly.
"You're a little creep, y'know that?"
"Yes, sir."
He sighed and rolled his shoulders, wincing at the painful cracks that resounded from them," You seen the media?"
She nodded," yes, quite the 'clusterfuck' as you would put it."
His lip twitched in amusement," perfect descriptor, honestly." He then clicked his fingers at the screen," Is Troy on today? Tell him to deal with the rest of the articles pl-"
"It's Troy's day off today, sir." (Name) interrupted, walking so she was standing next to him, she leaned over him a little to click away at the tabs he had opened," But I will call him to come in. You need rest." She replied promptly.
Vox watched her with an almost sleepy look in his eyes, watching her close down the articles with quick and manicured claws.
"What would I do without you, eh?" He hummed out.
A chuckle flitted from her lips and he found himself entranced by the sound of it," I think you'd do well for yourself without me, sir." She reassured with a gentle voice and stepped away from the desk a little, turning to face him," would you like me to accompany you to your room?"
He blinked and then smirked," how forward of you, sweetheart." He cooed out with that sultry tone of his," Take me out to dinner first, yeah?"
She tilted her head to the side with an owlish blink,"... Would you like to go to dinner? Would that be a better form of stress relief for you that the first option?"
His mouth fell open with a shocked look as he stared at her, a little buffering symbol in the top right corner of his screen for a moment before it disappeared, a dark blush appearing on his face," f-fuck wait... w-were you suggesting we..."
"We have sex? Yes. I hear it's a rather fantastic way of stress relief and you are a rather sexually frustrated individual so it would-"
He place a hand over her mouth as he stood from his chair, basically towering over her.
There was a hungry look in his eyes as he let that charming grin twitch onto his lips," You're about the best damn fuckin' assistant I've ever had."
She smiled beneath his hand and grabbed onto his wrist gently, maneuvering it so she could place an oh-so-gentle kiss to his wrist whilst looking into his eyes," I'm honoured, sir." She hummed out in a sultry fashion.
Vox gulped, his self-control snapping, red leaking from his mouth," I'm gonna fuck the shit outta you."
"I wouldn't have it any other way, sir."
▢ alastor ⍋
- Expressing your issues over a glass of giggle juice -
A sigh and a huff fell from her lips as she made her way into the hotel lobby, shoulders sagging from a long day of work.
There seemed to be nobody in the lobby as she walked over to the bar and poured herself out a glass of whiskey.
"Late-night drinking? That's not like you." The familiar static of Alastor graced her ears.
(Name) blinked and looked over to him, noticing how tensed his smile seemed. His eyes looked... genuinely exhausted. His ears flopped downwards ever so slightly.
"Looks like you should be joining me," She hummed back and grabbed another glass, wiggling it at him suggestively.
He watched it for a second before relaxing and grabbing it, sitting next to her at the bar and pouring the liquid. He took a sip with her and his smile seemed to curl in a more soft way now.
"Hm, I dare say my dear, that does just hit the spot doesn't it?" He hummed out, a more relaxed expression on his face.
"You can say that again. No wonder Husk is an alcoholic, I understand the appeal after having an awful day." She replied with a nod of agreement," yknow, sometimes I wish Hell was just a personal purgatory instead of me having to deal with other people's shit."
"Agreed. It gets tiring, doesn't it? Makes you want to go a little batshit insane, yes?" He said this with a polite tone of voice, ears perked up.
"I want to go on a murderous rampage every second of every day."
"We could join forces if it ever came to that. We would kill twice the amount of demons."
She grinned at him," how flattering. You'd go on a murder spree with me, Al?"
He pressed a hand to his heart to express his genuine sincerity," Dear, if I ever say no to a question like that then I give you my full and utter permission to kill me in the most brutal way you can think of." He replied honestly, and (name) didn't know whether to be flattered or concerned but she found herself laughing along anyways.
"What a charmer," She grinned at him brightly," You can be so romantic when you want to, hm?"
"Romance has nothing to do with it. It is merely etiquette." He tilted his head at her, resting it in the palm of his hand, expression seemingly brightened from just a conversation with her," what's got you so downtrodden?"
She deflated a little, smile tired," Overworked and under-appreciated for the work I do." She replied simply, taking a sip of her whiskey," I'll never smile again~" She sang sadly.
Alastor perked up at the familiar song," until I smile at youuu~" he serenaded, smile only widening at the sound of her amused laughter.
Then he looked her over, an almost disappointed glint in his eyes," I still wonder why you work for that insolent shitbox after all these years." His smile seemed to sharpen at the thought of Vox," He doesn't deserve you at all. Not a single bit."
(Name) shrugged," I'm helpless, what can I say?"
"You're not. You're a strong woman, (name). Stand up for yourself. And if you can't stand?" His eyes glowed sinisterly," Break his legs off so you can."
She stared on for a second before raising her glass," Most sound advice I've heard for years."
Alastor barked out an amused laugh and raised his hlass to hers, "For that compliment? I will break his legs for you if it is needed, darlin'. "
Clink went their glasses as they enjoyed each other's company for a while longer.
▢ lucifer morningstar ⚝
- Gentle caresses and positive affirmations -
"Okay so... meeting with the angels next week... then I have to call Michael- eugh cowabummer... then I have to-"
(Name) watched her friend flail around his office with a concerned frown on her lips, arms crossed over her chest.
He's been so stressed lately. He had that little break in between where he could just... chill.
And make his cute rubber duckies.
But now with everything in the hotel, he's had a lot more work on his shoulders. Specifically with Heaven, as unfortunate as that was.
She saw his claws scratching through his hair as he paced back and forth, as though he was entranced by all these... issues. He's so entranced he's forgotten she's there with him.
So she sighed and lifted herself from the wall and walked into his walk-cycle path, grabbing onto his shoulders before he could crash into her.
He blinked in surprise and met eyes with her, a dumbfounded expression on his face," Oh... Hey."
She smiled," Hey."
"Sorry, you've probably heard me complain enough lately. Your pretty ears must be burning with all the yapping-"
"Of course not, Lou..." She huffed out, interrupting him with a frown of disapproval. Her hands moved from his shoulders to his arms, rubbing gentle touches of comfort," I think you've got too much on your plate lately - you using me as an outlet to vent to is the least of my problems."
He deflated a little, a tiredly wry grin on his lips," You're... you're too nice, y'know that?"
"What? You'd rather I spit and degrade you~?" She flirted teasingly with a fanged grin.
"No thanks... for now." He then sighed and moved his head to rest on her chest, cheek smooshing against her collar bone," I need a vacation."
(Name) laughed as she threaded her fingers through his mussed-up hair gently and soothingly," You were basically on a vacation already, hon. Now's the time to get back to work. Put all those wonderful thoughts and dreams to good use."
He melted in her arms, closing his eyes slowly as he wrapped his arms around her waist. This felt more domestic than platonic, but the two of them were too focused on eachother to admit that.
"You'll stay, right? I like having you here." He mumbled tiredly," U-unless you don't wanna which I totally understand and a-accept... y'know, you don't have to be here if you don't want t-"
"Stop worrying you dummy." (Name) chuckled out,"... I'd love to stay here with you."
"Phew..." He huffed and grinned sharply," Good to hear... a-amazing to hear!... Y... you're the best."
"Don't I know it~!"
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kombuuuu · 11 months
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Miles 42 headcanons?
no one asked but i’ll deliver !!
Miles!42 x Fem!Reader random headcanons
also a lot of snippets :)
You/Reader: Blue
Miles Morales: Purple
Mama Rio/Rio Morales: Pink
Uncle Aaron/Aaron Morales: Orange
Random/stranger: Black
gift giving love language duhhh
Will have you walk with him through malls and whatever you look at for a second too long he buys
You don’t catch on until you’re both eating at a nice restaurant, absentmindedly staring at some plant when a lull in conversation happens.
He purchases the plant.
“Fuck you mean I can’t buy it?”
“Sir, the plants aren’t for sale, this is a dining establishment.”
“Establish the fact I’m gettin’ that plant.”
“Sir—“
50 bucks down and a plant 🆙
He will damn right die if you refuse him. He’ll get all grumpy and pouty when you say he should save for a house, not for you.
convinced you just get shy when bought things (you do).
is even more motivated to buy things
“Miles, baby, you need to save up. Not spend on me!”
“This would look so good on you, Ma.”
“Are you listening??”
“Fuck, and this.”
“Oh my god.”
gets so jealous it’s unbelievable
but only when someone goes too far with you
it’s like 1–100 real quick
he’s not usually the prowling type (ha)
but when someone pushes the line he loses his shit
other than that he’s a supportive bbg all the way
“Wanna go home with me, butterface?”
“Fuck you just say?”
“Nothing homie just get outta here.”
“Say that shit again ‘homie’.”
“Chill the fuck out. Let the lady speak for herself.”
“I’ll fucking speak for my girl all I want, homeboy.”
maybe got a liiiiittle bit of an anger issue
guy went home with a broken nose and a missing tooth
better hope he can afford fill ins
he would never get mad at you though
he gets frustrated you don’t listen sometimes, but it’s never to the point of anger
feel like he has the patience of a fucking SAINT
calm and collected baby u know the deal
“Mami, we gonna have a problem?”
“”
“Didn’t think so.”
a SWEETHEART at times
stand by him being raised right
mama rio taught him to be a romantic
wanted him to take after his dad
so flowers and gifts and chocolates
followed by lovin of any kind
probably a baby for affection but doesn’t show it
so when you get all emotional about being gifted roses for the first time
and hug him and smother him
give him stupid little kisses all over
he’s fainting
poor boy doesn’t know love like u show him
“Baby, are these for me?”
“Yeah, Chiquita. They okay?”
“Wh… They’re perfect.”
“Are you cryin’? I can return ‘em.”
“No! No, no, don’t do that.
I love them, C’mere.”
when you guys get rlly comfortable, like a year and some dating, he ends up getting more chatty
willingly talking w you for hours
feels like you’re the only person he can rlly do that with
rambles so rarely that you kind of just sit in awe when it happens
doesn’t catch himself until he’s trying to name your future kids
“I’ll marry you one day, we’ll have like two, three kids. Get all nice an cozy.
You want a boy or girl? I kinda want both. Definitely not girl first, never having a girl without a brother to protect ‘er.
You’d be such a good Mami.
What’d you wan’ name ‘em? I have a few ideas—“
“..”
“But you could choose the girl cause I don’t know any pretty names. And i’ll choose—“
“..”
“..”
“You gon’ let me keep goin?”
“I love your voice.”
“Tranquila, mami.”
Takes you to every family event he ever has
sits you regularly with Rio and Aaron
they insist you call them uncle and ma
you do, obviously
miles doesn’t need to meet your family if you don’t want him to, but if he ever does he’s totally suave with them
like weirdly smooth
able to get on ur carers good side quick
when you meet his extended family they’re just as loving
his whole family is this bright dash of colour
and you fit right the fuck in
“¡Oh, hija estás preciosa!”
“Dice la estrella de la fiesta!”
“You flatter me, Hija.”
“Miles, come get your girl.”
“You look nice too, Uncle Aaron.”
“..Thanks, kid.”
“Hey Mami, havin’ fun?”
“Aight, I’m out.”
when you find out he’s the prowler you’re not really shocked
he’s hella nervous to tell you and kinda puts it off for a while
as long as you’re not in harms way, nothin matters, yeah?
no
the guilt eats him alive
he’s already lost so much, if he doesn’t do things right with you, then loses you too
he’d probably lose himself
so he tells you
“The Prowler?”
“Yeah.”
“The.. Panther guy I keep seeing on the news-?”
“Mm.”
“Miles are you—
..—Are you killing people?”
“Mami, it’s not like that—“
“oh my god.”
“These men— I kill,”
“Oh my god, oh my god.”
“,They’re bad, you understand.”
“Miles..”
“[Name]. Do you understand?”
“Yeah.. Yeah I understand.”
“You can’t tell anyone.”
“I won’t.”
“…”
“Are you mad.”
“I’m not happy.”
“Okay.”
you’re kind of devastated he’s killing people
but you eventually get it
like it takes a while
say a month or so
but you forgive quick
i mean, who knows what those men are doing, right?
(ur delulu but it’s ok)
he lets you have your space but talking with mama rio when she realises your absence knocks some sense into him
mans is going to GROVEL
he will fucking beg on his damn knees
knocks on your door and is already kneeling
will plead with you to come back to him
like i said a whole ass romantic
you know what’s romantic? a man who can get on his knees
he will suffocate you in gifts and affection
oh you like (insert sanrio esc character) ? look over there at that lifesize plushie woahhhh wonder who that’s forrrrrr
“Hello?”
“Mami, don’t close the door.”
“Miles, go home.”
“And please stop kneeling, the floor is dirty.”
“I’m not leaving ‘til you hear me out.”
looooong sigh
“Okay, fine— whatever, come inside. You have two minutes.”
“God, I missed you. You’re so beautiful Chiquita.”
“Three minutes.”
You talk it out easy, he’s a real smooth talker when he wants to be
“Okay Miles, I’ll see you tomorrow yeah?”
“Yeah, Ma. See you soon.”
“Wh—.. What is that?”
“Ohhh…”
“Why the fuck is it so big?”
“It said “Life Size” on the site? I was thinking like two feet tall.”
“You bought that?”
“Yeah.. I was thinkin’ you wouldn’t let me in. Would have to bribe you.”
“…That’s really cute.”
Annnnnd that’s all i can come up with i’ll probably do more later :P
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husbandhoshi · 3 months
Text
[9:47 AM] *suggestive
the first thing you learn about seungcheol is that his towels are embroidered. csc, they read, in gold thread on absurdly plush bath towels.
(actually, the first thing you learned about him was that he's a good kisser. you learned this the hard way, outside the bar, after all your friends had gone home and it just was you, him, and his tongue in your mouth.)
as a rule, you try not to learn anything about your late night escapades, but, evidently, you have already failed.
it's easy to notice his bathroom looks much bigger than it did last night, now that all the lights are on. he has not one, but two, matching rugs, and the sconce lights make the marble countertop look like it's made of water. nestled in the corner is a little tray with all his cologne lined up end to end—armani, dior, chanel.
you pick up the silvery one on the end and smell the cap. (yes, this one. he was wearing this one last night, right in the space where his collarbone met the base of his neck. you had kissed him there, and he had asked you to go home with him. creed, aventus, it says.)
he even has the drunk elephant moisturizer, although it looks criminally underused. it sits among a small pile of skincare that looks like it costs twice your monthly paycheck, if you had worked overtime.
you have to remind yourself you're not here to snoop through rich people's bathrooms, as fun as that sounds.
seungcheol was a quick fuck (and a really good one at that), but you already feel like you've overstayed your welcome.
the plan—in and out. you hate the sticky, too-warm goodbyes, the small talk at the kitchen table, the unexpected rattle of a roommate coming home. worst of all, they never want you as badly in the morning as they did the night before.
but the plan has already gone to shit. you woke up practically spooning him and your little bathroom detour cost you ten minutes. and it's almost 10, which is what he has his two-hundred dollar alarm clock set to.
you shut the bathroom door as quietly as you can, hoping to make a quick getaway. but it's here, caught in the waxy overcast from the huge windows, where, for the first time in your life, you almost want to say fuck the plan.
"morning," seungcheol hums, propping himself up on the bed. you take one look at him, shirtless and sweats slung low, and you lose the plot entirely.
yesterday, when you had met, it looked like he was made in some kind of factory for hot men—starched white shirt rolled to the forearms, hair perfectly gelled, and a fat breitling watch hugging his wrist. and yet, as you watch him blow a cowlick out of his eyes, he seems even more attractive, which you would have never thought possible.
"someone's eager to get outta here," he says, enjoying the way you avoid his eyes. "don't tell me it was that bad for you."
you smile nervously. what you can remember about last night is that it was anything but bad. the whole thing makes your face feel hot—you are no prude, but he sure makes you feel like one.
"is that what it looks like?" you answer. you realize you can't find your shoes. you think he threw them somewhere last night, between the memory of his hand up your dress and yours in his hair. he kissed his way up your legs and you forgot you even had shoes to worry about.
"almost, if you weren't checking me out just now."
damn. guilty as charged. you can't help it. things feel too good to be true.
first, you learned you got fucked by a million dollar dick last night. now, instead of kicking you out like any other one night stand, he's acting decent, maybe even more than decent. and he has the tits of a god.
seungcheol sees your face wrench up in puritanical shame and he laughs.
"well, if you have time in your busy, busy schedule," he starts, with a grin that makes you dizzy. "i'm making breakfast. and i would love to eat it with you."
suddenly you don't know why you ever had a plan in the first place. you watch him attempt to wink at you from all the way across the room and you think getting to know him might not be such a bad thing after all. maybe things are too good to be true, but you're willing to find out.
needless to say, the second thing you learn about seungcheol is that he cannot cook.
the third? he's an even better kisser sober.
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katsukikitten · 11 months
Text
Teasing Bakugou, your husband of almost ten years, with a harmless prank by asking him "What do you think about sleeping in separate rooms?"
And he turns to you, giving you the WORST grimace he has and says immediately "Shut the fuck up." As he always does when you say something off the wall he knows you don't mean.
"No babe I'm serious they say we'll sleep better-"
"We'll sleep better? We'll fuckin sleep better? Are they us now?" He's rolling his eyes and back to his tasks, "Nah one room."
"Okay what about separate beds then?"
"What? Get the fuck outta here."
"Yea, like bunk beds or something." He freezes, shirtless and in his grey sweatpants, pausing his task of the dishes, even turning off the water so he can hear your answer to his question better.
"Yer telling me ya want fuckin bunk beds in our room? How are we gonna fuck baby? Ya gonna hang off the side of the top bunk and I eat it? Dumb ass."
You of course stick to the bit.
"But then we'd have our space to go if we argue."
"Are we arguing?"
"No-"
"Then we ain't changing shit. End of discussion." He then turns on the water and mumbles to himself "Fuck outta my face, bunk beds, separate bedrooms and shit."
Reckon it makes his blood pressure high enough he has to add one more thing.
"And another thing little miss cries on the phone when I can't come home from my monthly night hero shift cause it's hard to sleep without me. How the fuck would ya manage two nights without me when we've been sleeping together for a full fuckin decade."
"Deku body pillow." He blows up the plate in his hand, turns off the water and launches himself over the counter peninsula to pin you to the soft couch where he can tickle you and smack your ass until you admit defeat, "Okay okay! A Dynamight body pillow!"
He let's up, scarred chest all puffed out before he huffs
"Yer god damn right." His strong fingers squeezing your cheeks and puckering your lips, "Sides yer not sleeping in any bed but ours. Got it, princess?"
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