#i might actually die if i have to put this level of effort into yuu and wil skdjfhgjkl | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

cc-hatredisland · 6 years

Text

Exploration. {Arts Room}

Vague fragments of Mikiro’s song bounce around in my head. Maybe it’s because I’d never listened to anything he’d written before. Like no other song had, actually. Super High School Level students probably had some magnetic quality to the stuff they did. I guess thinking about it that way, it’s easy to see why it was so memorable.

Since the Arts Room was so close, it took no time at all to find the door and let myself in. Chiffon was quick to follow, so caught up in following my pace that she wasn’t able to babble as much as she usually did.

The second I opened the door, the various smells of paints and supplies hit me all at once. I couldn’t help but cough. Probably wasn’t even that strong in there; I was just unused to it. There were a variety of easels and canvases in the way; the room was pretty small and because it was so crowded, I ended up having to push things aside to get around.

I actually couldn’t see Nagase until I cleared the path a little. Well, it didn’t help that she was sitting on the floor for whatever reason.

After what I’d witnessed earlier I wasn’t actually sure how to approach her. Nagase was pretty anxious without the added stress and I wasn’t the most sensitive person in the world. But I wanted to try and say something before Chiffon did; she was still behind me, tripping over this or that. So I guess I had time on my side, at least.

“Uhm... Nagase. Hey.”

I cringed at how false I sounded.

As I predicted, Nagase basically jumped out of her skin. It felt weird; I was on eggshells every time I talked to her but I still ended up messing it up somehow. Maybe I oughta read a book on it or something.

Her eyes kept going all over the place, as if she was looking for something or someone.

“Uh... uhm... er... y-you... are weather. Yes! Hello! It’s... a nice one!“

Oh, ouch. The awkward’s making it hard to breathe over here.

“Look, I’ll be real. If I’m bothering you, it’s okay to just say so, y’know? If you don’t make it clear, I won’t know. And this is... a weird place for all us to be. I get that.”

“No! No, no, no, no! Oh, um! Oh gosh, how to say...!”

The way she spoke so loudly all of a sudden had me reeling but it seemed like she wasn’t bothered. Considering all the death and the whole Shiratori thing I thought she’d be in tears. She twiddled her thumbs for a bit before continuing on.

“I want... to... I want to... um... I-I’d like to try and do better. I’m... I’ve... said... and acted things... I’m not proud of. And I think... I’m thinking, if I wallow, that’s um, that’s going to... it’ll hurt us all. If I really make an effort to get along... and be normal, then...!“

“I’m gonna stop you there. Listen, forcin’ yourself’s only gonna stress you out, right? Nobody wants you getting an ulcer over acting out of character.”

“N-no, but... but listen. Yuu-chan told me something... and I felt it click in my head somehow. Yuu-chan said, ‘talking to this many people is a miracle’. She said that... maybe ‘we knew each other’ before this. And... considering what Hanji-san... said...”

She paled at the mere mention of him. Given what he did... what he’d said... and how he died... I could hardly blame her. She shook her head, desperate to get back on track.

“I want to believe we were friends. So, although I’m like this, please give me your patience. I, um... I wanted to also... thank you... on another note... ‘cause you... helped a lot. In the... you know.“

In the trial, I’d guess.

“You did, too. Without you, I’d have probably been lost. I didn’t have much evidence directly tying it to him.“

“We can’t... let that happen again.“

“Murder... in fiction is one thing. B-but it’s... it shouldn’t be like that in real life. And dying like that, there’s... there’s absolutely no ‘justice’ in that.”

There were a lot of reasons to hope it never happened again. It was wrong on every level. Yesterday’d been so wild I was almost tempted to write it off as a dream... but I knew how dangerous that’d be. And on a maybe less relevant note... I didn’t want to risk messing something that important up again. That ‘trial’...

Even I know it didn’t go so well. You’re supposed to work it out so easily - they do it on TV like that. But it ended up so messily and... I kept thinking about it. How unfinished the whole thing felt.

The easy thing to hope is that it’d just never happen again. But an awful gut feeling kept me wary.

“Nobody wants to die and nobody wants to get killed. Should be obvious. I’m hoping people take what they saw to heart and gets smart about it. Everyone wants to get out but we’re better off working on our own terms; not his.“

“... Oh... it’s a he?”

I shrug.

“It’s a whatever. Who cares?“

She seems to warm up and a little and laugh.

“I get that you’re doing your brand new you thing but... are you really gonna be okay? I mean, I’m not the softest guy around, sure, but there’s more than me to worry about. Rie, n’ Kasahara n’... Shiratori.“

Her face falls on the mention of the lats name on my list.

“You... overheard.”

“Wha-? No, I just...”

This wasn’t working.

“... Yeah. Sorry.”

“I think... Shiratori-san... needs to, um... it’s like, he needs to think things over for a bit. I... I’m hurt, of course, it’s still... but. But, him being like that, um, it’s not just trouble for me. It hurts everyone when he acts like that. Controlling things with your moral compass... how can I put this? It’s... it’s arrogant. To think that your right and wrong are the rights and wrongs of the world. And enforcing that without asking, it’s... well... if you ask me, of course it’ll end up badly.“

Yuunagi had a similar way of thinking. I mean, I guess I did too but I thought about it more basically than that. I just kinda thought he was an ass.

“So, uh... you’re gonna be okay, then?“

“T-that’s... that’s a little hard. I’ll probably cry a little and I’ll... always worry what people think but... I’m gonna try and fix that. I want to believe our survival here is a little more important than, er... something like that... in the past. You know? I mean! Not that it’s not valid! I mean, if it weren’t me, I mean, if I weren’t me, I might be like... hmm, but like... you know... the timing... i-it’s hard to say. I don’t know, I just hope it’ll go well.”

I guess that’s enough for now. Hope is all a lot of us have to go on right now. At least, until something switches it up. It feels like we’ve been talking for a good few minutes now and the refreshing silence was now beginning to gnaw at me. Alright. Where was she?

I turned around to look for her and... to my surprise, I had completely lost track of Chiffon. Uh. Oops?

Turns out she’d wandered off to a whiteboard and was looking at it pretty intently. I excused myself from Nagase but she followed behind, albeit at a distance.

“What the hell are you doing back here?”

The serious expression on her face kinda through me for a loop. Had she actually found something? I looked at the whiteboard and all I saw were some ground rules and scribbles. There was a lot to see but most of it’d been erased. There were just smears of red and blue, where words probably used to be. Seems like it’d seen a lot of use.

“I’m looking for... proof of myself.“

She seemed a little irritated.

“Because! It’s strange, right? Admit it: it’s strange! I’m here and nobody knows anything about me! Even if I don’t remember anything, you lot should, shouldn’t you?“

“It’s not like we knew much about each other either, y’know. We’re workin’ this out as we go.”

“I’m being excluded! There should be exciting clues to who I am everywhere! Why can’t I find them? ... Ah... no, could it be...?”

You’re an idiot?

“Aha! Hahaha! Of course. You’re supposed to find them for me!“

“I’m what now?”

“It’s not much of a revelation if the revelator finds it out, right?”

I can feel my shoulders sag at a weight I can’t quite explain but it’s definitely linked to this chick. She just seems so overwhelmingly proud of everything she says. Nagase seems amused, at least.

“You’re always in such good spirits.“

Oh right, she stayed with Yuunagi and Nagase, didn’t she? Guess she’d be more familiar with Chiffon than I am.

“A good spirit is key to a good body and mind. Now then! Make my mind sharper yet by telling me about this room!”

“Go look yourself.”

She stared at me with the audacity of a guilt-free puppy that’s just chewed through your shoes.

“It’s fine! I, er, okay, um, I know it sounds dull but when I get to like, you know, introduce people to, uh, to things. It’s great! Mm. Yeah. Super great.”

It sounds sarcastic but coming out of Nagase’s sincere mouth I figured she was just flubbing her words.

She ushers Chiffon over and sweeps an arm across the room. The room was... small, well, it was probably more average but it just felt smaller due to all the crap lying around. A big table took up a huge bit of space too and to go with the painting supplies, there were chalkboards and whiteboards and even some statues. Whether someone had crafted ‘em or someone had just left ‘em here, I had no idea.

“This is the Arts Room. Since the place was a free school, you could come in here at any time and practice your craft.“

“Like magic?“

“... Um, no. Um, more like, you know... whoosh ... and splat... clay, paints... pen...cils... anyway, art.”

Chiffon nodded but I wondered about what that gesture even meant for her.

“There are a lot of supplies for it, too. Clay moulds, sponges, duct tape, paints, inks... there’s even safety equipment. Like an apron or some masks. I mean, I’d guess some artsy people get, you know, like, um... super into it. I guess. I know when I’m writing I lose my every sense...“

As Nagase talked, I listened with some vague interest, but I couldn’t help but be drawn to the same whiteboard Chiffon was drawn to. I’d been trying to pick out words on it for a while now, the erased ones, but it was no easy feat. Still, I swore I could see some. Greetings, project details and... names. Kotobuki. Seiyama... and... Anzai. I thought I read those names. But maybe it was some kinda confirmation bias. Like... I wanted to see those names.

I shrug and turn back to Nagase and Chiffon who are still moving around the room.

“These are... naked men.“

Nagase almost stumbles over when Chiffon says that, pointing at some of the busts.

“I mean. I... y-you can’t really see the lower half, so... a-anyway, th-that’s art. It’s just. Artistic!”

“Hmm.“

I get the impression she’s not impressed and Nagase’s face continues to redden as she reaches for her glasses. As I glance around, I can see there are pieces on the wall, some scenery sketches and paintings but no one I recognize.. and no names are on them, either. A red clock’s in this room, too, just ticking away. There’s a window too, so you can let in a breeze. I opt to take a peek out of it.

... Hm. Yep. That sure is sky.

Seems like you could jump to the ground floor but you’d probably risk breaking your whole damn leg.

... Well, maybe I could manage it, though.

I glance back to see Nagase seemingly finish up her tour.

“... And you can find some tutorials and guides in here. I think it’s... nice. Like, you could learn to start drawing anytime. So! What do you think?”

“... Art seems like a hassle.“

I guess we can cross Super High School Level Artist off her list, too. With that small tour done, I was guessing we were done in here. Well, unless I wanted to talk to Nagase a bit more, anyway.

* Talk to Chika Nagase

[Next] >> [Previous]

#hatredislandexploration #kaede shimizu #chika nagase #chiffon #hatredislandchapter2

0 notes