#i just looked it up and the 1930s british queer scene was beautiful like jazz age stuff

[natjennie]

like seriously whatever you do dont think about the captain and that story about someone calling into gay bars and not saying anything, just listening to queer people living and laughing and having fun. definitely don't think about the captain doing that. haha.

#both during his life and in death #i just looked it up and the 1930s british queer scene was beautiful like jazz age stuff #the idea of the captain just discretely privately calling into places he's heard rumored to be queer #just to listen to the saxophone over the static of the telephone and know that there were gay people living and loving somewhere #and then to think about him missing that EVEN MORE in death because now he cant LEAVE #he cant hear rumors from people he cant call in #imagine the favors he'd have to owe julian to dial a number and let cap listen to the receiver without knowing what it is #like of course julian wants to know and he pesters him. but when cap is Deadly Serious and scared and sad. #a face julian's never seen. he winds his jokes down and agrees to do it #making cap think it was his idea- 'a bit of charity for the old walrus then'- instead of a deep understanding and love #and since its been decades of course the number he calls isnt a gay club anymore. maybe it doesnt even connect #and it breaks his heart and it takes him another decade to gather intel and the nerve to ask julian again #but when he does he finally gets a place and the phone quality is INCREDIBLE he can hear so much #he can hear people and their upbeat music and their laughter and their love #and he cries #and if julian sees it and pretends not to then its so that he can have the blackmail later thank you for asking #anyway im making myself emotional #bbc ghosts #EDIT Becuase then when julian overhears he tries subtly to make the captain feel more comfortable #bc julian is an asshole but he's not homophobic i mean he fucks everyone #so he tries to pepper in more stories about men but that just makes cap uncomfortable #and hes frustrated bc he cant think of anything else to do other than flirt with him but thats a bad idea #but then he remembers that he went to bars and places and maybe he'll like that #so he 'accidentally' dials some clubs he knows were cool and leaves the phone off the receiver for cap to find #and cap just gives him a curt nod and a clearing of his throat and they Dont Talk about it but they Know