#i don't know. i'm emotional about it. it's a time capsule for an era of radically shifting desires on an international scale | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

moschus · 2 years

Text

I'm trying to make a comeback (I guess)

So strange to be on tumblr again. It really is a tiny lil' time capsule. It's a little cringe to read some of my older posts, but it's necessary too. I've grown, but whether it's for the better is up for debate.

I started journaling because I needed to dump some of these thoughts. I'd rather them be written on paper or typed away into oblivion than linger in the corners of my consciousness, so here we go.

I had a dream a couple of days ago. It was a whole life with J, the first person I really loved. I thought I loved other people before him, but they don't hold a candle to the memory of him; I don't know why. Maybe because I was, for the first time in any relationship at that point, as genuine as I could be. I was still leagues away from being a competent communicator and have the regrets expected of a short-lived dalliance in your early 20's, but I digress. In any case, it was a vivid dream -- a whole life lived, down to the plush velvety furniture I always dreamed I would have in my home (but know would be too ostentatious to be practical). The whole thing was oddly lucid and included banter, candor, and self-confidence only a 30-something would possess despite the relationship being nearly a decade ago.

I woke up wondering why I dreamt something so contradictory to my life now -- in a healthy and stable relationship with D (As much as it could be. If we could get a cat, it'd be perf). I'm still not sure. If I could come up with an answer, it would maybe have to do with a longing for the past. Now that I've passed the NCLEX and am entering another phase (and tax bracket) in my life, it gives me pause. I've been working towards becoming a nurse for the last five years, and perhaps reaching this milestone has made me subconsciously long for the past. I've come so far away from that girl living in a dinky Oakland apartment. I miss those days, to some degree. I romanticize the hustling, the turmoil in developing myself as a woman, a fully-formed person with complexity and self-doubt. I miss her in a way... but more like, I sentimentalize that bygone era before social media really had a foothold on my life. I didn't get a smartphone until 2015, so I was more accustomed to just texting or calling people straight up. I wasn't looking at facebook that much, and I didn't even create an instagram yet. But I was also largely depressed during that time -- the breakup, feeling lost in what to do in my career, hooking up with people because of low self-esteem (*le sigh*), intense loneliness despite making sure I was out and about at least once a week.

I really don't know why I romanticize that time in my life so much. Those years were really fucking hard on me mentally, but I guess it's the growing pains. It's sympathy for that younger self who didn't know how to express herself and who desperately craved approval and to feel liked, desired, or really, anything. I don't know how I feel about these emotions. Knowing that they lurk is almost like knowing that I'm in arrested development... Am I dooming what I have now because I glamorize a past life? Probably not, but sometimes I'm scared that I am at risk of self-sabotaging again, like how I did with J (not exactly true, but broad strokes for broad blog posts). Still, I'm glad that I dumped these thoughts on tumblr. Until next time, when the lil' itty bitty thoughts accumulate again and take up too much mental RAM.

youtube

a sad oldie for a sad oldie (when skinny jeans had a chokehold on us lol)

#thoughts #Youtube

1 note · View note

elvagodevil · 4 years

Text

Sobre supper's ready, la obra magnánima del rock progresivo.

Una piedra angular en la historia del rock progresivo, Supper’s Ready encontró que este género aún en desarrollo estaba apunto de alcanzar su apogeo. Había habido pistas de álbumes de dos dígitos de longitud antes, no menos la propia The Musical Box de 10 minutos de Genesis, pero nada tan conceptualmente épico, tan ambiciosamente ejecutado como Supper’s Ready. Construido a partir de siete partes distintas que forman un conjunto musical irregular, instantáneamente se convirtió en quizás la aventura musical más famosa e influyente en un género y luego estalló en sus bancos creativos con pistas clásicas de todos los tiempos: la plantilla para el adornado, clásico influenciado, lisérgicamente -cargada, heroicamente tonta, peculiarmente inglesa variedad de rock progresivo que luego gobernó el mundo. Según el tecladista Tony Banks: “Cuando lo comenzamos, pensamos que estábamos escribiendo una especie de seguimiento de The Musical Box, y todo iba bastante bien. Luego tuvimos esta canción bonita y bonita, Willow Farm, por sí sola, y pensamos, ¿qué pasaría si de repente pasáramos a esa secuencia de acordes descendentes y feos? Nadie lo estaría esperando. Y una vez que nos metimos en eso, pensamos, bueno, estamos aquí ahora, continuemos, con libertad, y veamos a dónde nos lleva. Cuando reunimos todo y lo escuchamos por primera vez, dijimos: "Oh, esto es bastante bueno". Sin embargo, el ex guitarrista de Genesis, Steve Hackett, insiste ahora en que no estaba convencido de que fuera una buena idea: "Pensé, nadie va a comprar esto, porque es demasiado largo". Las referencias [líricas] son demasiado remotas. Es totalmente ambiguo. Pensé que la primera vez [el jefe de Charisma Records] Tony Stratton-Smith escuchó que iba a decir: 'Lo siento, muchachos, se acabó el juego, se canceló el contrato, recibirán noticias de nuestros abogados' ". En cambio, fue Stratton-Smith quien alentó positivamente a la banda a llevar su música lo más lejos posible, según el productor de Foxtrot David Hitchcock. Al ver su papel como "esencialmente un facilitador", Hitchcock dice que su mayor contribución a la canción fue "explicando que no tenían que tocarla todo el tiempo para grabarla, que podíamos hacerlo sección por sección, con fundidos cruzados y ediciones, luego póngalo todo junto más tarde. Eso les permitió concentrarse durante los tres o cuatro minutos de cada sección, y obtener el mejor rendimiento posible, al mismo tiempo que les permitió traer diferentes sonidos para cada sección, en lugar de reproducirlos directamente con un sonido largo y homogéneo ".

La presión también estaba sobre la banda para encontrar éxitos en las listas. "No en el sentido de hacer que suenen más comerciales", dice Hitchcock, "sino en el sentido de llevar lo que hicieron lo más lejos posible". Las tensiones en el estudio eran abundantes. "Principalmente entre Tony y Peter", dice Hitchcock. "No hubo grandes reventones, solo mucho enfado". Cuando Gabriel comenzó a cantar sobre el solo de teclado en la sección titulada Apocalypse In 9⁄8, Banks admite: “Estaba enojado. "¡Estás cantando en mi bit!" Entonces me di cuenta de que ahora tenía toda la emoción que habíamos estado tratando de crear, especialmente la sección "Seis, seis, seis". Tienes mucho drama en los acordes, entonces lo que hizo en la parte superior lo llevó a otro nivel. Sí, ese medio minuto más o menos es nuestro pico ". La otra gran batalla que Gabriel ganó fue por la letra. "Todos estábamos involucrados como letristas en Foxtrot per se", dice Hackett, "pero Pete insistió en escribir todas las letras para Supper’s Ready". Posteriormente se difundió el rumor de que el núcleo de la narrativa lírica se basaba en una experiencia "sobrenatural" que Gabriel había vivido con su entonces esposa Jill; que Gabriel había estado convencido de que estaba poseída y blandía una cruz improvisada con velas, a lo que ella reaccionó violentamente. Según Hackett, sin embargo, la situación era probablemente más prosaica. "Creo que ha habido un cierto consumo de drogas. Creo que estaba teniendo un mal viaje en un momento dado, y que Pete y un amigo lograron convencerla y sacarla de los horrores o lo que fuera. Así que eso es parte de lo que trata la canción, pero en cierto modo hay una especie de implicación de redención que va con eso

Walking across the sitting-room, I turn the television off

Sitting beside you, I look into your eyes

As the sound of motorcars fades in the night time

I swear I saw your face change, it didn't seem quite right

And it's hello babe, with your guardian eyes so blue

Hey my baby, don't you know our love is true

Coming closer with our eyes, a distance falls around our bodies

Out in the garden, the moon seems very bright

Six saintly shrouded men move across the lawn slowly

The seventh walks in front with a cross held high in hand

And it's hey babe your supper's waiting for you

Hey my baby, don't you know our love is true?

I've been so far from here

Far from your warm arms

It's good to feel you again

It's been a long long time

Hasn't it?

I know a farmer who looks after the farm

With water clear, he cares for all his harvest

I know a fireman who looks after the fire

You, can't you see he's fooled you all

Yes, he's here again

Can't you see he's fooled you all?

Share his peace, sign the lease

He's a supersonic scientist

He's the guaranteed eternal sanctuary man

Look, look into my mouth he cries

And all the children lost down many paths

I bet my life you'll walk inside

Hand in hand

Gland in gland

With a spoonful of miracle

He's the guaranteed eternal sanctuary

We will rock you, rock you little snake

We will keep you snug and warm

Wearing feelings on our faces while our faces took a rest

We walked across the fields to see the children of the West

But we saw a host of dark skinned warriors standing still below the ground

Waiting for battle

The fight's begun, they've been released

Killing foe for peace, bang, bang, bang

Bang, bang, bang

And they've given me a wonderful potion

'Cause I cannot contain my emotion

And even though I'm feeling good

Something tells me I'd better activate my prayer capsule

Today's a day to celebrate, the foe have met their fate

The order for rejoicing and dancing has come from our warlord

Wandering in the chaos the battle has left

We climb up the mountain of human flesh

To a plateau of green grass, and green trees full of life

A young figure sits still by a pool

He's been stamped "Human Bacon" by some butchery tool

He is you

Social Security took care of this lad

We watch in reverence, as Narcissus is turned to a flower

A flower?

If you go down to Willow Farm

To look for butterflies, flutterbyes, gutterflies

Open your eyes, it's full of surprise

Everyone lies like the fox on the rocks

And the musical box

Oh, there's Mum and Dad, and good and bad

And everyone's happy to be here

There's Winston Churchill dressed in drag

He used to be a British flag, plastic bag, what a drag

The frog was a prince

The prince was a brick, the brick was an egg, the egg was a bird

(Fly away you sweet little thing, they're hard on your tail)

Hadn't you heard? (they're going to change you into a human being!)

Yes, we're happy as fish and gorgeous as geese

And wonderfully clean in the morning

We've got everything, we're growing everything

We've got some in, we've got some out

We've got some wild things floating about

Everyone, we're changing everyone

You name them all, we've had them here

And the real stars are still to appear

(All change!)

Feel your body melt

Mum to mud to mad to dad

Dad diddley office, Dad diddley office

You're all full of ball

Dad to dam to dumb to mum

Mum diddley washing, Mum diddley washing

You're all full of ball

Let me hear your lies, we're living this up to the eyes

Ooh, aah, na-na-na

Momma I want you now

And as you listen to my voice

To look for hidden doors, tidy floors, more applause

You've been here all the time

Like it or not, like what you got

You're under the soil (the soil, the soil)

Yes, deep in the soil (the soil, the soil, the soil!)

So we'll end with a whistle and end with a bang

And all of us fit in our places

With the guards of Magog, swarming around

The Pied Piper takes his children underground

Dragons coming out of the sea

Shimmering silver head of wisdom looking at me

He brings down the fire from the skies

You can tell he's doing well by the look in human eyes

Better not compromise, it won't be easy

666 is no longer alone

He's getting out the marrow in your backbone

And the seven trumpets blowing sweet rock and roll

Gonna blow right down inside your soul

Pythagoras with the looking glass reflects the full moon

In blood, he's writing the lyrics of a brand-new tune

And it's hey babe, with your guardian eyes so blue

Hey my baby, don't you know our love is true?

I've been so far from here, far from your loving arms

Now I'm back again

And babe, it's gonna work out fine

Can't you feel our souls ignite?

Shedding ever-changing colours

In the darkness of the fading night

Like the river joins the ocean

As the germ in a seed grows

We have finally been freed to get back home

There's an angel standing in the sun

And he's crying with a loud voice

"This is the supper of the mighty one"

Lord of Lords, King of Kings

Has returned to lead his children home

To take them to the new Jerusalem

youtube

#peter gabriel #genesis

3 notes · View notes