#i also remember often getting distracted n reading myths n wikis n searching of so much other info too

[noxtivagus]

INTERPRETATION YES THATS THE WORD I KEEP ON FORGETTING

#🌙.rambles #that is so random but #ok honestly i've been feeling rather empty n apathetic ever since last night but #thinking abt creative stuff helps n #random but oh my on words i realize i'm often like this HSKFJSJFJS #when i was like. i can't rmb what grade but before i was 7 or smth i rmb #one of my fav words was 'silence' IDK WHY IT WAS RLLY COOL FOR ME AS A KID N #one memory i have v clearly is in the bathroom of that school bcs #that was the only time i celebrated my bday at school omg so #anyways i'll keep this bit short but hi random story i remember just shouting 'silence' when i remembered the word all of a sudden #idk why.. im like that with words... >_< #thinking abt that makes me remember the times i wld just search for hours for words n skim through dictionaries n stuff like that n #names! yes names i wld search for names for my ocs for hours oh my god #i'm very dedicated to. my passions like that. in a way aaaa #i rmb searching names w meanings of 'dark' 'night' 'sky' blah blah mythology too n angel names #i also remember often getting distracted n reading myths n wikis n searching of so much other info too #anyways i was just listening to music n i have these images in my head #i wld very much like to draw them :< but as much as i loved painting as a kid i never rlly had the chance to properly cultivate that #into a skill ig. but thinking about it i loved painting so so very much i've always loved colors #speaking of colors this is very random but today i'm wearing a top that is not black! wow! (it is white) #i've been feeling kinda dead lately but my. mind. my creativity n my analysis n wtvr that keeps me so so alive #thinking abt sciences n stories n uhh knowledge in general n expressing myself through different forms of art #I REALLY WNA LEARN HOW TO DRAW T_T & i shld rlly play the piano again #i shld probably learn the guitar first bcs we have one here too but goddamn i want to learn the violin so bad #i have a certain fondness n affection for elegance. goddamn i wish i at least tried out ballet as a kid aww #hmm another random thought but ig one reason why im so disappointed in myself is bcs ik i can do so so much better #& i used to be so much better as a kid yk i used to be the type that you'd probably brag abt. maybe say things like oh what a waste that #she's so shy or smth. idk. anyways i have regrets but i try so hard to just be enough for myself #THAT SAID HOLD UP I RAMBLE SO MUCH AAAAA #wait i will continue this in another post bcs i have sm i want to talk abt