#i HATED getting 2nd place as a kid! Dont even give me that shit wtf!? Dont call me up there to be a LOSER 😂 | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

roccoroks · 6 years

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Dag 3 THE DAG FILES! *que X Files music* The following events took place at the Spring Grand Rod Run, names have been changed to protect the stupid and liable. time:.......dark....ish im working a double, 2nd & 3rd shift pryor to the take over of the motel there for i was still a employee at the time and had to answer the a boss (the sorry motherfucker that he is) but thats another story/rant. its hot outside, people are pissing and shitting all over my lobby bathrooms and im trying to deal with 100+ geusts and god only knows how many classic cars... this is more of what its like to deal with multipul shitty guests and problems while working a rod run in pigeon forge tn. the grand rod run takes place twice a year and has more that 1000-2500 show cars through out the city of pigeon forge. we find our hero sitting on his ass watching youtube videos and eating potato chips and trying to download bootleged My Little Pony:Friendship Is Magic episodes when the internet suddenly explodes and stops working due to me trying to download 30 episodes at once! this is more of what its like to deal with multipul shitty guests and problems while working a rod run in pigeon forge tn me: *prior to net crash* ^.^ *om nom nom nom* *internet crashes* me: O.O........shit....not good me: hey chris (we work in pairs on rod runs) chirs: whats up man me:.....um i think were fucked chris:what did you break? me: the internet....all of it chris: I FUCKING TOLD YOU NOT TO DOWNLOAD THAT MUCH PONY SHIT AT ONCE! me:.....sorry?...you fix?...please chris: *sigh* leave, NOW! me: *me runs out from behind the counter just as the phone rings* ~when the wifi goes down at the motel, you might as well have set the place on fire, eeeeveryone calls to tell you!~ me: front desk poc 1: (pissed of coustomer) yeah uh hi, the inter net is not working, how do i log on? me: (i know its not working, i broke it! ^.^) im sorry we are having technical difficulties and are trying to restore it as we speak! poc1: oh ok ill try later! bye me: that wasnt so.... *ring* me: front de..... rpoc: (realy pissed of coustomer) HEY THE INTRANETS NOT WORKING me: im sorry we ar....(did you just say "INTRANET"?) rpoc: WHEN I MADE MY RESERVATION I WAS TOLD THERE WAS WEEFI AND I DONT HAVE WEEFI WHAT DO YOU PLAN TO DO ABOUT THAT! me: sir im trying to get it back on line and i should have it working with in.....( WAIT...WTF IS WEEFI?) rpoc: I DONT WANT EXCUSES I WANT THE INTRANET FIXED me: sir? sir are you there? rpoc: *yells louder* I SAID IIIIII WWWWWWWWAAAANT TTTTHEEEEEEEE INTERNET FIIIIIXXXXXXEEDD NNNNNNNNNNOOOOOOOWWWWWWW CAN YO.... me: SIR YOUR GOING TO HAVE TO SPEAK UP BECAUSE I CANT HEEEEEEEEEEAAAARRRRRRRRR YYYYYYOUUUU! (fucking yell at me dick head) rpoc: *SOME HOW YELLS EVEN LOUDERER* III SAID FIX THE GOD DAMED INTRA......... me: idk chris i cant hear the guy, he sounds like a broken record. (lmao i soooooo can hear the vein in your head thumpin!) rpoc: you have got to be kidding me, now the fucking teller phone doesnt work *hangs up* chris: what was that all about? me: thats how you deal with a bad guest chris: great! now hes going to come down here and bitch to me me: yup, see ya later! me: *leaves to check parking lot for cars to tow,leaves chris to clean up mess* me: *looks out the window* (if there were any more cars in my parking lot it, this place would look like a poory orginized scrap yard) me: *walks outside for 3 hours* *3 hours, 2 beers and one smokey burn out from a dodge challenger later* *sitting at the desk, chris leaves for the night* chris: im turning my phone off, dont....fucking.....call...me! me:k me: (back to down loading ponies! and cruse CL for car parts) poc: AHEM! me: /).- (I will not respond to a clearing of the throat, what the fuck bitch, this aint high school) poc: AAAAHHEEEEMMM! ME: (NOPE! FUCK YOU) poc : EXCUSE ME! me: (was that so hard?....bitch) yes mam! may i help you? ^.^ poc: uuuhh you need to do something about that drunk guy in the pool.... me: drunk guy? poc: yes hes in the pool and hes drunk and i dont want to see that! me: ...*blank stare* poc: well.... me: (do i get any more info than that? ITS THE ROD RUN! EEEVVERRRRRYYYBODIES FUCKING DRUNK!) yes mam what does he look like? poc: HE IS THE DRUNK ONE! me: (com'on! take the hint!) mam this is the rod run and everyone in the pool is drunk, is he bothering you in anyway? poc: well..huh..he just shit in the pool.... me:........ me:....your shitting me....(i haha i made a funny) poc: she for your self! me: *goes to pool, see only 3 people in the pool, all of them drunk* me: soooo he just? poc: yup, he just dropped his swim suite and shit right in the pool, then he jumped it , then he told his friends that it was a candy bar and dared them to eat it! me: .......*speachless*.... me: ok mam, who dun shit in my pool *i sooooooo wish i was making this up* poc: him! *points at all 3 drunk people* me: (really? not the middle one, not the one on the right just that one?)ok witch one of them? poc: the fat one me: (THERE ALL FUCKING FAT!) ok witch fat one poc: I FUCKING GIVE UP! *STORMS OUT* me: (damn, she lasted longer than most, shee needs a discount!) me: *walks out into the pool* ok, who shit in my pool (this situation warents cussing) *all the drunk people* "HE DID" *AND POINTED AT EACH OTHER!* me: /).- WHERE IS IT! *again all three of them * THERE! *all three point in different directions!* me: soooo its everywhere.... *blank stares all around and akward silence* me: where....is..... the.... TUUUUUURRRRD *more blank stares* drunk guy 1: ummmmmm me: all of you, GET OUT! drunk guy 2: but what if we.... me: NOW! *all three exit pool* drunk guy: um when can we get back in the pool? me: tomorrow dunk guy 2: why so long? me: look im the only guy here and i have better things to do then go on a wild goose chase for a lone turd in the pool! drunk guy 1: well whos going to clean it up? me: NOT FUCKING ME! YOU WANA SWIM? GO NEXT DOOR AND LAY A LOG IN THEIR POOL! *they all think this is wildly funny and walk off to deuce one out in the smokey mountain lodge's pool* 30 mins and a few pissed off would be pool goers later ME:* just sat down to pizza* *ring, ring, ring,ring,ring* me: FOR FUCK SAKE! I HATE YOU PHONE *get up and walks to phone* me: *bangs knee on desk drawer* FUCKING OOOOOWWWWWWEEEEEEEEE ! FUCK YOU TOO BROKEN DESK DRAWER! AHEM! front deak *in sweet voice* dag: (room 403)" THE GAW DAMN INTRANET AINT FUCKIN WERKIN!"(i a heavy drunk southern accent) me: e.e...(you sound familar) its not? one second let me check. *puts customer on hold* me: *goes to bathroom to take a dump* 5 mins later me: (fuck ! hes still there!) *takes dag off hold* sir? dag: BOUT TIME! me: try it agian dag: I DONT FUCKIN KNOW HOW TO GET ON THE GAW DAMNEDED THING ME.......O.o (then how do you know its not working.....WAIT, HOW THE FUCK ARE YOU....DO YOU EVEN COMPUTER BRO?) me: sir? dag: *YELLS TO WIFE* HEY! GET THA FUCK OVER HERE AND MAKE THE FUCKER WORK ME: .....(oh my god this is like jerry springer) *long pause* dags wife in background: THERE! IT FUCKING WORKING...WAIT NO, YES...NO ITS NOT ME:.......sir? DAG: HANG ON DAMNED IT! ME:......*SUCKING BACK LAUGHING.....BECAUSE I JUST FLIPED THE BREAKER TO THE ROUTER KILLIN ALLLLL THE INTERNETS* dag: IT JUST WAS FUCKIN WERKIN THEN THE SHIT BROKE ME: HANG ON A SEC.....*puts dag back on hold, sit down and eats a slice of pizza* 4 slices of pizza later... me: *flips breaker back on, takes dag off hold* sir, HOW BOUT NOW? dag: HAY, HE SAYS ITS WERKIN........WELL.....GET THA FUCK OVER HUR AND MAKE THE TING GO! ~pernounce it just like i wrote~ long pause...... dag: aigh the fuckers workin now ME: go deal yall, yall has a goooooooood nigh nowww...... dag: hangs up me: (THAT WAS FUN! now for foods!) *almost sits down* *ring, ring,ring,ring,ring* me: FUCKING REALLY?!? ahem: front desk? dag: HAY ME: (oh gawd not you again) yes sir dag: what room are we in me: O.o..(really.....you dont even know what room....) 403 sir dag: im in 403? me: yes sir dag: TELL THEM FUCKERS ABOVE ME TO SUCK THE FUCK UP OR IMA GONA BEAT 7 SHADE OF SHIT OUT OF THEM! ME: (i would pay soooooo much money, you dont even know) sir its 930pm and during the rod run thing tend to go on until 12 am or so, im sorry but there nothing i can do dag: I GONA KICK THEIR ASSES! ME: SIR! PLEASE DONT GO......*CLICK* ME: *RUNS OUT THE DOOR TO THE 5TH FLOOR* FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK! *arives at 5th floor.....its empty* me: ......(aint no one up here) *walks down to 4th floor, sees drunk guy outside 403, in whity tighties, passed out in the chairs* me: (im sooooo not dealing with that) *goes back to office* me: * sits down at the desk and see something out of the corner of my eye* *looks at security moitor* me: DAFUQ IS THAT? *switches to pool cam, see UFO (unidentified floating object)* me: nooooo, it cant be.... *zoooms in, sees large turd* ITS BACK! THE TURD! ME : *runs around the counter to the pool, trips on carpet and knocks over entire brocher rack* me: (deal with that later, I HAVE SOME SHIT TO TAKE CARE OF!) *at the pool* me: damn.....thats quite the deuce....atleast a 2 pounder *starts talking to myself in a steve irwin accent* me: wear hear in the confines of the pool room, in search of a veronious beast! SHHHHH *GRABS SCOOPER* aahw yea thar she is, just look at hur thear, she a absolute beauty! and shes a floata too! me: *lowers scooper, turd slide off the edge* awhh shes a fisty one she is! ima grab her tail! me: * trys to come from below and scoop it up, turd veirs away* shes a quick won! HUHO QUICK! THE SHELA IS MAKIN A BREAK FOR IT! me: *finaly scoops turd* HE SCOOPS HE SCORES!!!!!! * turns around see's hot girls laughing at me* me: *looks at turd on the scooper* (theres not a hole deep enough for me to craw off in right now) *drops turd in trash* * relocks pool goes to desk to commit suicide* 20 min later me: *watching youtube, probably supercharger videos around that time* dag: HAY, YOU BACK THUR? ME: (maybe if i sit reeeeeeeal still he will not see me) dag: HAY! *leans around counter* me; (FUCK! IT SAW ME) me: yes sir how ma.... dag: LISTIN THE INTRANET DONT WERK, YOU GOT US UNDER THESE LOUD FUCKING PEOPLE , YOUR POOL IS CLOSED AND IT AINT EVEN TIME TO CLOSE IT AND TO TOP IT OFF NOW MY TV DONT WORK me:im sorry sir (no im not) but i cant move you to another roome because we are full. dag: WELL WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU GOING TO DO ABOUT THIS! I WANT A GWAD DAMND DISCOUNT! ME: (no you need to put a shirt on, no one needs to see your "DD" man titties!) im sorry sir theres nothing i can do, you will need to talk to the manager in the..... dag: I DONT WANT TO HAVE TO WAKE UP EARLY AND COME THE FUCK DOWN HERE TO TALK TO A MANAGER I WANT THIS SHIT FIXED NOW! me: (and i want a decent blow job from my wife, but that shit aint going to happen either) im sorry bud but i cant do anything until morni...... dag: YOU CAN ATLEAST OPEN UP THE FUCKING POOL! me: sir i cant op.....SURE THING! TELL YA WHAT IF IT WILL MAKE YOU HAPPY I WILL OPEN THE POOL JUST FOR YOU AND YOUR FRIENDS BUT NO ONE ELSE, IS THAT OK? dag: now thats more like it *walks out the door* me: (BAWAHAHAHAHHAHAHHA!) 15 MINS LATER. DAG AND HIS WIFE ARE SWIMIN IN THE POO WATER LAGOON *chis walks in with beer* chris: *stops, looks at the two fuckers swiming in the pool* you know its past 11 right? you not suppost to let people swim past 11 me; i know chris: oooookkkk why do they get to swim? me: because i hate them chris:sooo you hate them and they get to swim.....is that the motherfucker that yelled at me for the inter net not working? me: yup, and some one shit in there earlier to day too chris: *snots beer out his nose* HAHAHHA WHAT THE FUCK? me: yup, fuck them chris: thats sooooo wrong me: yup chris: your going to hell for this but it sooooo worth it /rant

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omar-199x-blog · 7 years

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first and last time ill post about myself (maybe)

* 1: name omar * 2: Age 19 * 3: Fears oblivion * 4: 3 things I love Food, Art, my girl * 5: turn ons my girl * 6: turn offs everyone else * 7: My best friend savannah then james 2nd just cause he knows me well * 8: Sexual orientation i am a male. penis and all. * 9: My best first date dont remember * 10: How tall am I 5'7 ish lol * 11: What do I miss the way holidays use to feel * 12: What time were I born an inconvenient one * 13: Favourite color lol black, red, grey * 14: Do I have a crush no i have a gf * 15: Favourite quote you get what you give * 16: Favourite place i hate crowds lol but i love the city especially during arts festivals * 17: Favourite food anything home made, steak and seafood are both at the top * 18: Do I use sarcasm when im using english * 19: What am I listening to right now Migos * 20: First thing I notice in new person how much they talk and what about * 21: Shoe size 10.5 US * 22: Eye color brown * 23: Hair color black * 24: Favourite style of clothing ummm... shit if its black, fits loose and is casual enough for hang outs but also stylish for dinner dates, you set * 25: Ever done a prank call? once and the cops came saying it wasnt funny * 27: Meaning behind my URL its my name and i was born in the 90's *shrug* * 28: Favourite movie i love all kinds of movie its hard to pick a favorite * 29: Favourite song gold steps / Neck Deep * 30: Favourite band BMTH/NeckDeep/Deftones * 31: How I feel right now annoyed as always * 32: Someone I love savannah marie * 33: My current relationship status almost a years worth of lovin * 34: My relationship with my parents all up in my life * 35: Favourite holiday christmas/thanksgiving * 36: Tattoos and piercing i have none and none but coming soon * 37: Tattoos and piercing i want a thigh piece that'll be across both a chest piece of the quote i put up there ears and nose but my girl dont like the idea of my nose * 38: The reason I joined Tumblr it was cool in 2013 * 39: Do I and my last ex hate each other? lol kat is a bitch for leading me on into a relationship i thought she was actually gonna dedicate to * 40: Do I ever get “good morning” or “good night ” texts? texts and phone calls from my gf * 41: Have I ever kissed the last person you texted? all the time * 42: When did I last hold hands? last time i saw savannah * 43: How long does it take me to get ready in the morning? depends on where im headed to * 44: Have You shaved your legs in the past three days? not in the past 19 years * 45: Where am I right now? on bluemound omw to work * 46: If I were drunk & can’t stand, who’s taking care of me? savannah we usual go out together * 47: Do I like my music loud or at a reasonable level? loud unless we chillin and talkin * 48: Do I live with my Mom and Dad? about to be neither in like a week but my dad * 49: Am I excited for anything? moving out, tattoos, painting, cooking, working out * 50: Do I have someone of the opposite sex I can tell everything to? savannah * 51: How often do I wear a fake smile? ehh if im mad u can tell * 52: When was the last time I hugged someone? told my grandparents bye while leaving for work * 53: What if the last person I kissed was kissing someone else right in front of me? id go crazy and probably kill both of them * 54: Is there anyone I trust even though I should not? lol yeah cause he dont keep secrets well * 55: What is something I disliked about today? i didn't see sav * 56: If I could meet anyone on this earth, who would it be? André3000, Big Boy, Johnny Depp, Lenny Kravitz, and Post Malone lol ;Posty because he from round my city so we could vibe easily * 57: What do I think about most? life and how im failing or acing it * 58: What’s my strangest talent? it wouldnt be strange to me so idk * 59: Do I have any strange phobias? fuck caterpillars, fuck slugs, and snails whatever phobia that is * 60: Do I prefer to be behind the camera or in front of it? haha both but im usually behind it * 61: What was the last lie I told? im not hungry * 62: Do I perfer talking on the phone or video chatting online? otp cause idk what to do with my face on facetime * 63: Do I believe in ghosts? How about aliens? yes and yes theres greater and more advanced beings than us and also souls dude they can choose to stay or go so like duh * 64: Do I believe in magic? yeah * 65: Do I believe in luck? ya * 66: What’s the weather like right now? breezy i work outside so perfect * 67: What was the last book I’ve read? i start books and halfway start another * 68: Do I like the smell of gasoline? FCUJ YES lol idk why its like dude i should be getting high of this smell but its not making me high wtf * 69: Do I have any nicknames? omii (oh-me) , catfish , choncho * 70: What was the worst injury I’ve ever had? broke my arm, nose, and ankle * 71: Do I spend money or save it? both when needed * 72: Can I touch my nose with a tounge? no * 73: Is there anything pink in 10 feets from me? what? no * 74: Favourite animal? red pandas * 75: What was I doing last night at 12 AM? at work * 76: What do I think is Satan’s last name is? sama * 77: What’s a song that always makes me happy when I hear it? hey ya / outkast * 78: How can you win my heart? being sav * 79: What would I want to be written on my tombstone? "See ya later losers" * 80: What is my favorite word? trudge * 81: My top 5 blogs on tumblr um idk their specific url's but i follow a graffiti one, a music one, a painting one, and some others similar to these * 82: If the whole world were listening to me right now, what would I say? stop with all the hate man, if someone isn't harming you or effecting your life specifically let them be. let people do what they want to do and dont harm. thats it. * 83: Do I have any relatives in jail? did, he passed away. * 84: I accidentally eat some radioactive vegetables. They were good, and what’s even cooler is that they endow me with the super-power of my choice! What is that power? teleportation * 85: What would be a question I’d be afraid to tell the truth on? if im hungry because its a yes 100% of the time * 86: What is my current desktop picture? my uncle who passed away * 87: Had sex? ya * 88: Bought condoms? ya * 89: Gotten pregnant? not possible * 90: Failed a class? ya * 91: Kissed a boy? no * 92: Kissed a girl? ya * 93: Have I ever kissed somebody in the rain? ya * 94: Had job? ya * 95: Left the house without my wallet? yes * 96: Bullied someone on the internet? lol ya * 97: Had sex in public? no * 98: Played on a sports team? ya * 99: Smoked weed? ya * 100: Did drugs? ig * 101: Smoked cigarettes? yea * 102: Drank alcohol? yerp * 103: Am I a vegetarian/vegan? nah nah i love steak * 104: Been overweight? still am * 105: Been underweight? yea * 106: Been to a wedding? yes * 107: Been on the computer for 5 hours straight? i guess maybe * 108: Watched TV for 5 hours straight? yea * 109: Been outside my home country? yes * 110: Gotten my heart broken? i suppose * 111: Been to a professional sports game? yes * 112: Broken a bone? a couple * 113: Cut myself? by accident * 114: Been to prom? yea * 115: Been in airplane? yes * 116: Fly by helicopter? nah * 117: What concerts have I been to? Kevin Gates, Big Sean, Jeremih, Carnage, RaeSremmurd, Post Malone, Russ, Future, J Cole * 118: Had a crush on someone of the same sex? hella nah * 119: Learned another language? spanish * 120: Wore make up? for theater * 121: Lost my virginity before I was 18? yes * 122: Had oral sex? yes * 123: Dyed my hair? no * 124: Voted in a presidential election? no * 125: Rode in an ambulance? recently * 126: Had a surgery? yes * 127: Met someone famous? yes * 128: Stalked someone on a social network? no * 129: Peed outside? yes * 130: Been fishing? many times * 131: Helped with charity? yea * 132: Been rejected by a crush? dont think so * 133: Broken a mirror? no * 134: What do I want for birthday? an apartment * 135: How many kids do I want and what will be their names? 4 - 2 boys first 1girl then another boy i only know my first sons name will be Aiden * 136: Was I named after anyone? no * 137: Do I like my handwriting? hell nah * 138: What was my favourite toy as a child? headphones * 139: Favourite Tv Show? shameless, Friends, family guy * 140: Where do I want to live when older? on my own * 141: Play any musical instrument? no * 142: One of my scars, how did I get it? forearm surgery 2 plates 11 screws * 143: Favourite pizza toping? pepperoni * 144: Am I afraid of the dark? sometimes * 145: Am I afraid of heights? no * 146: Have I ever got caught sneaking out or doing anything bad? yes plenty * 147: Have I ever tried my hardest and then gotten disappointed in the end? eh life * 148: What I’m really bad at life * 149: What my greatest achievments are finding my gf * 150: The meanest thing somebody has ever said to me: idk * 151: What I’d do if I won in a lottery get tf outta here and go be alone * 152: What do I like about myself theres only one me * 153: My closest Tumblr friend none * 154: Something I fantasise about eat food from around the world * 155: Any question you’d like how was my day? eh i woke up at 2pm and haven't had any food yet so im pretty grumpy

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