#horrible godsaint trauma pals

[crimeronan]

everybody talks about and memes on the euphoria-and-tragedy of carpenter and faulkner becoming siblings when you forgot to consider that faulkner had killed his sibling before but ALSO. have any of you guys ever stopped and. just. thought about em.

thought about carpenter's brother giving himself up to the trawler-man body and soul. in a decision that made sense inasmuch as keeping his faith went, but was also wildly destructive and hurt people and more importantly, left his sister fully alone in the world. when she had already lost Everything else she held dear.... em's death as one of the things that most firmly shaped carpenter's tumultuous relationship with her own faith n the trawler-man, the miracles after he died and the helpless "you took everything from me" anger/grief combined.....

do you ever think about em as a man willing to give up everything for his god. including his sister. who loved him more than anything.

and then. DO YOU THINK ABOUT FAULKNER-

#HELLO CAN ANYBODY HEAR ME. FOR THE LOVE OF GOD HELLO #IT'S KILLING ME THIS RELISTEN IT IS KILLING ME. #the silt verses #the silt verses meta #tsv #carpenter #faulkner #horrible godsaint trauma pals

[crimeronan]

i think there's something really beautiful about carpenter distancing herself from the trawler man every chance she gets and still getting showered by miracles while faulker, oh he of strong convictions, gets to bring the miracle of the trawler man to everyone around him but never quite gets to ascend to glory himself. i just love that they're both perfectly poised to stare at each other and each think "your goals are backwards and your methodology is dumb and possibly sacrilegious" and then still end up as something close to friends

also let's talk about how, despite these dynamics, at the end of the day, the trawler man is really just trying to give each of them what they want from him.

MMM YEAH. carpenter being beloved by multiple gods despite being such an ornery bitch who wants NOTHING to do with their sacrificial bullshit..... it really gets me. as does faulkner's ongoing crisis of faith and spiral into Faithless Cult Leader (TM). SO GOOD.

perhaps only tangentially related, but.

i've been thinking a lot about faulkner killing roemont lately. i was surprised that roemont's death ended up Breaking My Fucking Heart -- a real testament to his voice actor!! the whole pathetic old man losing everything he's worked for really.... Got To Me. ough. "don't you recognize me?" OUGH.

but i've been thinking about it in the context of faulkner's crisis of faith, too. because like. faulkner Knows that roemont is faithful. he considers roemont a heretic for trying to legalize the worship of the trawler-man, but it's like....

i feel like. killing roemont was a test of the trawler-man that faulkner devised on purpose. because if roemont dies due to the prayer marks that faulkner scrawled, then there are two possibilities:

1. the trawler-man really IS furious that the high katabasians want to legitimize the faith; the trawler-man really IS on faulkner's side; this schism really IS necessary to keep the faith "pure," and faulkner has never done anything wrong;

OR

2. the trawler-man really IS nothing but a mouth. this isn't a god with a plan or with sentience or with feelings, this is just a living river that chews things up and spits them out, and it doesn't care for its followers at all. and if that's the case, then faulkner is betraying nothing by being a faithless cult leader lying repeatedly to his people.

faulkner is devastatingly clever and constantly being underestimated. but he's also completely alone in the world. and he's Desperate for any sign that the choices he's making are the right ones. and he can't find that sign in anybody close to him, because he keeps destroying the lives of those close to him. so he has to devise his own trials....

hrugh. my boy. my boy my boy my boy.

#replies #the silt verses #the silt verses meta #faulkner #carpenter #horrible godsaint trauma pals #i keep just thinking about like. the constant question of how much gods care and how much agency they have #how much of this worship is a social construct made by people and how much is natural to the world? #does it matter? is there a difference between those things? #as someone whose original fiction ALSO plays a lot with #'magic is real but the way it's perceived is based in social constructs'.... I FUCK WITH IT SO HARD. #and the silt verses is a piece of media that like... i end up having different thoughts every time i listen to it #so in a few days or weeks i might not even stand by this meta. i might have different thoughts/interpretations entirely!! #it's a different story every time i listen. it's SO GOOD.

[crimeronan]

rafi was like "wait, faulkner is 18-20? how old is carpenter, then??" and i was like "i don't Think we have an exact age for her? but ambiguously middle-aged" and rafi, who has Not listened to the silt verses, but who Has listened to Extensive infodumping about carpenter and faulkner's whole Deal, was like, "OH NO. OH GOD. OH NO THAT'S HER BABY BROTHER."

#the tragedy of faulkner is that every stupid thing he does makes complete and total sense. and carpenter loves him So Much. #the silt verses #horrible godsaint trauma pals #carpenter #faulkner

[crimeronan]

the silt verses and the owl house are currently on a similar tier of familiarity in my brain which is funny because obviously they're very different pieces of media (adult horror podcast vs children's cartoon). like the depth of the gore and the tragedy is different even though there are 1 to 1 episode parallels here and there, since both stories are vicious critiques of late-stage capitalism and colonialism and state violence.

but i've listened to and rewatched (and read the transcripts for) both So Many Times Now that they're permanently embedded in my brain. i go back and i re-experience them knowing every story beat and when i notice new shit it's stuff like "oh, there's a callback to that 30 episodes from now" or "oh, you sowed this theme THIS EARLY??" or "OH, THAT'S A SUBTLE BIT OF CHARACTER FORESHADOWING I HADN'T PICKED UP ON BEFORE...."

because both pieces of media are equally saturated with very very Very detailed thematic sandboxes and smart storytelling. GOD i love them both. i really really Really do.

#relistening to silt verses season one and let me tell you #when you listen to carpenter and faulkner talk about their respective dead brothers when you know where their own relationship is going.... #GOD ALMIGHTY. SO FUCKING GOOD. PINS IN SO MANY GRENADES RIGHT FROM THE GETGO #toh #the silt verses #horrible mindscape trauma pals #horrible godsaint trauma pals