#homoose headcannons

[homoose]

BAU Christmas party🥺 with drunk Emily and Spencer😏

LOVE ‼️ THIS ‼️

because I just know Spencer is a sloppy drunk bc he really never gets drunk but once or twice a year and always/only in the care of close friends

whereas Emily is a heavyweight champ like she routinely drinks Derek under the table FOR SURE.

so when they’re drunk together?????? and Spencer is a lil loosey goosey with his touch and just like hugging and hanging on her and she’s feeling the absolute BEST but also like low key supporting his gangly ass frame and they end up curled up under the duvet with Sergio sandwiched in between‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️

Penny leaves the water and ibuprofen on the bedside table and Postmates McDonald’s to Emily’s apartment the next morning

#homoose answers #spemily #tw alcohol #homoose headcannons

[hercleverboy]

hi there everyone !!

I’ll start by saying that this is absolutely freaking insane. it’s wasn’t too long ago we were celebrating 1k and we’ve come so far since then! I want to take this opportunity to thank everyone for being so lovely and so welcoming and for making this little corner of the internet feel like home. I have met so many brilliant people and they have had such a positive impact on me and my life as a whole, and for that I am so so grateful. x

I will be accepting asks up until June 20th!

for everyone:

🌷send me a spencer reid concept and I’ll write some headcannons for it!

🎶 I’ll shuffle my playlist and recommend you three songs!

🦋 send the name of a hypothetical fic and I’ll give you a summary of the plot if I were to write it!

☀️honesty time! ask me any question and I’ll answer honestly

☄️ rant to me about whatever you need to get off your chest and I’ll give my unsolicited advice

🍉 I’ll choose one of my wip’s and post a little snippet!

moots only:

💌 I’ll handwrite you a lil’ personal love letter!

💓 I’ll give you a compliment!

📒 send me a fic of yours and I’ll write a review (all good things, I promise!)

tagging some people I love and admire! -> @goldentournesol @alltooreid @ssa-m-187 @rigatonireid @laurnrnlds @jareids @reidyoulikeabook @ellesgreenaway @reidemandweep @homoose @mercy-burning @spacedikut @reidsconverse @reidsnose @wheelsup @reidtheprettyboy @idmakeitbehave @obliviousreid @gubesboo @maxcerr

#kate’s sleepover🥂 #thank you so so much #I am beyond words

[wheelsup]

ri’s 300 friends party 💕💋

thank you for 300 besties 💝 my blog is still really new (it’s not even three weeks old okay), so i wanted to do one of these to get to know y’all better! taking new asks until feb 14 💕

for everyone <3

🪐 - i’ll recommend a song for you

♟- send a character and i’ll give you a song that reminds me of them

🕷- i’ll give an unpopular opinion (specify cm or otherwise), OR, send me an unpopular opinion and i’ll lyk if i agree

🥀 - i’ll give you a shemar moore meme from my collection (very good choice, my shememe collection is everything to me)

🌑 - i’ll tell you something from my life that seems like it was from a movie but actually happened (basically fic worthy content)

📓 - i’ll give you a line or two from a wip

🐞 - i’ll share a headcannon and do a small blurb about it (send character if you want a specific one)

for the moots <3

📝 - i’ll do a funky little doodle of your icon (it won’t be good but it will be charming)

🦥 - i’ll make you a moodboard (send a few words so ik what vibe u want) 

🎱 - i’ll make u a mini playlist using letters of your username (or your real name)

💌 - a handwritten note for you

tagging some moots i wanna get to know (i wanna know ALL my moots and followers but i kept it short, i love you even if you’re not written) <3 @ellesgreenaway @spencerreidsmiles @suburban--gothic @dralexreid @morcias​ @reidtheprettyboy​ @paget​ @jcreaus​ @criminalmindzjunkie @dorotheuh @cloudy-reid @scandinavian-punk @tobias-hankel @rigatonireid @makaylajadewrites @hotchsbabygirl @saspencereid @hercleverboy @voidreid @megankane @sapphic-prentiss @homoose @reidingmelodies

ok it wasn’t that short a taglist but i did my best and i also havent spoken to some of you before but this is me saying hi bc im shy lol

#ri’s 300 #pinned

[reidabookforonce]

fic recs

i’m afraid of tagging the authors lol but i’ll link their masterlists

you can also check #nat's fic recs , #nat's blurb recs & #nat's hc recs

at some point i may divide this list up but for now enjoy this very long list

fluff = 🤍 | smut = 🌊 | angst = 🌧 | all time favorites = ✨

criminal minds

spencer reid

one shots

@/catsadams | masterlist

girls on film ✨

@/imagining-in-the-margins | masterlist

sweater paws 🌊

teacher's pet 🌊

@/gubler-me-up | masterlist

heavy lifting

@/spencersawkward | masterlist

honesty is the best policy 🌊✨

@/mxchellesworld | masterlist

going live 🌊✨

@/cacoetheswriting | masterlist

close to your heart 🤍

@/reidyoulikeabook | masterlist

too good 🌊

personal google, sometimes you just don’t know the answer 🤍

headcannons/blurbs

@/homoose | masterlist

love language 🤍

@/drspencr | masterlist

quarantine 🤍🌊

@/subspencer | masterlist

getting jealous of the attention boy band reid gets 🌊

spencer discovering his hair kink 🌊

aftercare

@/mgg-theprettiestboy | masterlist

period pains 🤍

@/spenciebabie | masterlist

nudes 🌊✨

@/softspence | masterlist

a cockwarming good girl 🌊

leave the goddamn vest on: an alt take 🌊

@/thespringpriestess | masterlist

thin walls 🌊✨

@/reidsnose | masterlist

advil 🤍

@/mggpleasedontlookhere | masterlist

home 🤍

@/thmrdrs

dating spencer reid headcanons

@/ssa-m-187 | masterlist

spencer taking care of you after a hard day 🤍

morcia

headcannons/blurbs

@/spencehotchner

morcia’s first kiss

movie characters

chip taylor

headcannons/blurbs

@/subspencer | masterlist

chip teaches you to degrade him 🌊

9-1-1

evan buckley

one shots

@/itsreigns | masterlist

failed ✨

#nat’s fic recs #nat’s hc recs #nat’s blurb recs

[homoose]

what do you think reid would be like as an elementary teacher?

I think he’d be amazing I mean think about it

he is consistently shown to be incredible with kids— often times moreso than with adults, potentially because kids don’t label him as strange in the way that adults do

although the show never directly comes out and says it, there’s ample evidence that Spencer is autistic— and this would give him a very personal perspective on behaviors that others might label as “negative” or “disruptive” (as well as definitely make him an advocate for all of his kids, but particularly those that might feel on the “outside”— because let me tell you, there are some teachers out there who do not make the classroom safe for everyone)

this also means that when he designs his classroom, he’s thinking about all learners (not just neurotypical ones)— simple/calm color schemes (NO RAINBOW CLASSROOMS FOR GOD’S SAKE), alternative lighting (think lamps, string lights, natural light vs. the fluorescent lighting in public schools), a very detailed calming corner (but honestly the whole room would be calming), etc.

he has his own experience with being socially ostracized/bullied, so he would work really hard to make sure that doesn’t happen in his class— it would be the safest classroom ever

he knows SO MUCH STUFF, so he would never have a moment where he was like “hmm I have no idea what to teach today” bc he could literally just like make up a lesson on the spot

he has such a strong background in psychology and human development, so he wouldn’t be stressed about kids “performing well” on exams and things because he knows what is developmentally appropriate and what might take kids a little longer to learn

this would also mean that he would differentiate like nobody’s business— just like, he would make sure to tailor every single lesson to accommodate every kid’s needs and learning styles— and he would read up on all the ways to support visual, auditory, tactile, and kinesthetic learning methods

art time with Dr. Reid?! are you kidding me?! he would draw them lil characters and they would color them in and then gift them back to him and he would be 🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺 like he would legitimately frame that shit

you know that mf is such a good story teller, the kids would be enthralled by him constantly also he’s probably read every single children’s book by the end of his first year teaching so he knows which ones are the best

we already know he loves dressing up/wearing costumes, and he would dress up to match whatever he’s teaching 10000000%. like whether it’s a frog sweater when they’re learning about amphibians, or literally dressing up in a Max costume when he’s reading Where the Wild Things Are

he would read every single book, article, etc on teaching and challenge every single bs education policy in his school and back it up with like “actually, did you know that administering letter grades is actually not helpful in raising student achievement? studies show that...”

he would be so interested in all of his students’ interests, and he’d do research and teach himself all about it so they could talk more about it in lunch bunch

speaking of lunch bunch, YOU KNOW that mf loves kid foods— mac and cheese, chicken nuggets, those lil round pizzas— more often than not he’s in the lunch line with his kids

I think it would probably be a little bit of a running joke that Dr. Reid can outtalk any of them— kids are notorious for being ramblers, and he just... really gives them a run for their money

also, his classes would have the most insane vocabularies, are you kidding????????? he would have second graders out here being walking thesauruses— if you’ve ever seen the videos of that teacher who is like HYPE about the inter-district vocab challenge????? Dr. Reid’s classes would be the undefeated champions of shit like that

#homoose answers #homoose headcannons #goddamn that got long #I’ll probably think of more someday #teacher!spencer

[homoose]

what do you think spencer’s love language is?

god okay this was in my box for a bit today and I still just idk dude I could see almost a little bit of all of it?

words of affirmation— I think he needs this in terms of love. with quite literally everything else, he’s the expert. he knows everything there is to know and he doesn’t need anything spelled out for him. but in terms of knowing how you feel about him????? he’s never been very good at social cues and reading between the lines so he needs u to be v explicit with how you love him and why 🥺

quality time— with his job????????? this is BIG and when he’s with you he’s with you. before you he took his work home with him. after you? when he’s home, he’s home. especially before the era of mandated leaves? you have his undivided attention whenever he’s not at work— no distractions. like he’s very serious about this and the phones and laptops are tucked away for the duration.

acts of service— another big thing for him, and I think particularly in terms of his expressive language. like he struggles sometimes with his own words even though he needs them from you. so he does a lot of cleaning up, stopping by the grocery to get you milk or eggs or cereal (especially if he’s cleared you out when he was over), making your coffee, picking up your dry cleaning, etc.

gifts— this might be the only one that I don’t think he really cares too much about? he’s not a minimalist by any means, but he doesn’t really need things.

touch— @spacedikut already had this in an ask today and i co-sign everything that was said, but to summarize: he loves touching the people he loves 😌

#homoose answers #homoose headcannons #long post

[homoose]

omg your teacher!spencer HC got me thinking and imagine a school AU where all the characters are different teachers

hotch is the principal

spencer could be a high school chemistry teacher or an elementary teacher (honestly he could teach anything he wants lol)

jj is an elementary teacher

derek is a coach

emily is a languages teacher

and so on...

OOOH YAH (teacher!spencer hc here) were gonna say this is like a K-12 school just because...

Hotch: total principal, are you kidding? no other character has ever principaled quite as hard; comes off very boring and stern, but has a huge soft spot for the trouble makers and is lowkey an amazing mentor; runs one of those young gentlemen’s groups where he teaches them how to tie their ties and shit; coaches the debate team; travels to all the classrooms throughout the year as a guest reader and is surprisingly great at story voices

Gideon: chaotic AP that actually doesn’t really help at all— half the time Hotch isn’t even sure where he is; usually letting kids get away with shit because he thought it was pretty clever; helps with the senior prank

Rossi: replaces Gideon as AP when he retires and doesn’t do much better; always in his office; when kids get in trouble they have to come to him first— only the most severe offenses go to Hotch— so he deals with a lot of kids who get caught with like cigs or other contraband and always “confiscates” it; the kids love him bc he’s hilarious and also bc he knows a lot of pop culture that they’re into

Derek: could go either way for me— either he’s the gym teacher who takes it a little too seriously, OR he’s the English teacher who uses Nas and Tupac in his poetry unit; either way, definitely coaches after school; he’s a favorite among the kids for sure— he jokes around constantly, has a secret handshake for every kid; talks to them on their level, and always lets them play games at the end of the day (around the world, heads up seven up, etc)

Spencer: already talked about this in my hc but he’s just the best teacher; not afraid to be a total weirdo/goofball; very conscious and supportive of different learning styles and preferences; has the most ambient classroom; his students are always the smartest in the whole damn building because he reads up on every single teaching strategy and knows how to utilize them to best support his kids

JJ: elementary teacher for sure; she’s a Pinterest/IG teacher thru and thru— like her classroom is aesthetically perfect (organized, labeled, color-coded) and she probably has an essential oil diffuser or something; she definitely plays with the kids at recess— either kicking the soccer ball around, playing tag, jumping rope, or just laying in the grass and chatting in the sunshine

Penelope: she replaces the stuffy old tech teacher who spent 5 weeks forcing everyone to learn intermediate excel; at first the kids are like 👀 because Penny G is bright— but on the first day she has them all design their own websites and everyone immediately loves her; teaches them to code; runs an after school “tech club” which is literally just hacking skills 101

Emily: absolutely the languages teacher; also, a hot mess; the complete opposite of JJ— her classroom is literally just the furniture that was provided by the school and like three posters that JJ forced her to hang up bc “jesus Em it looks like a prison in here.” the kids don’t really care— they love her bc she just gets them and she’s always got snacks; also regales them with stories and pictures from all of her travel and years abroad; definitely organizes and chaperones various Europe trips and exchange student programs

Tara: the teacher that does not give a single fuck about what anyone thinks about her style abd methods; teaches some type of social science, maybe sociology; loves her kids and knows they can handle tough/weighty conversations; facilitates many debates and mostly manages to stay neutral; kids hang out in her classroom after school; definitely teaches older kids; very sarcastic with them and they love it

Luke: socially a himbo, academically a nerd; teaches chemistry and makes it super accessible and easy to grasp; always eating in the lab even though it’s against his own rules; his favorite day of the year is the ice cream in a bag day; brings Roxy to work with him occasionally and the kids are obsessed

Matt: definitely teaches some type of history or social studies; always has coffee (he has five kids of his own, he’s exhausted); he’s really into the presidents for some reason and knows like all kinds of random facts about them (like the Taft bathtub fiasco and that Zachary Taylor shat himself to death); coaches cross country or swimming and won’t shut up about it

Stephen: the guidance counselor; literally just the nicest human on the planet; will let you sit in his office and cry any time; writes extremely heartfelt recommendation letters for college apps; has a candy drawer and a collection of stress balls

Blake: definitely everyone’s teacher mom; genuinely loves and cares for every student and they keep in touch with her after they graduate; also teaches English and she and Derek are BFF; they run a literary magazine club after school and do a slam poetry night in the cafeteria; gets a lot of “you changed the course of my life” letters

Kate: the cool teacher; she’s an adult, but she’s still in the know about everything the kids like; has a fun teacher Tik Tok account; uses her clout with the kids to influence their decision making aka gets all the gossip so that she can surreptitiously counsel and educate her kids about being safe and advocating for themselves— in online/social media spaces and beyond

#homoose answers #homoose headcannons #again this got long af #criminal minds imagine #criminal minds au

[homoose]

what do you think the bau would do at pride? 🏳️‍🌈

they’re all cops but hopefully they’d just be chill 😅

no I’m kidding but ummmmmmm hm

I think Derek and Luke and Penny and Matt would love it from start to finish they love the energy and the hype and the fanfare

Hotch and JJ would be stressed because they’d be hardcore mom n dad-ing and trying to keep track of everyone but the all the kids keep wandering off and getting pulled onto floats (Penny in particular)

Emily and Tara and Spencer are overwhelmed and/or don’t have time for the commercialization like they just wanna read gay erotica and maybe watch a documentary and then get drunk and eat a rainbow assortment of snacks

#homoose answers #homoose headcannons #i know that i spelled headcanon wrong but it’s too late to change it know #long post #THE WAY NOW IS APELLED KNOW IN THE TAG CORRECTIN HC #I SHOULD QUIT NOW

[homoose]

my friend and i were talking and we came up with how the bau smells

morgan: axe body spray....but good

garcia: floral and vanilla but not overbearing

jj: fresh linen

rossi: leather and cigars

hotch: like after it rains in the morning in the summer

spencer: old books, coffee, and hand sanitizer

emily: like woodsy mixed with like vanilla

gideon: absolutely no fragrance

-🧃

brb CRYING at “gideon: absolutely no fragrance”

and ok I agree with u on literally everything here except for Derek how DARE U that man owns at least four different colognes for different occasions like he has one for the office, one for date night, one for vacation, and one for special occasions and frankly penelope has developed a Pavlovian response to them 🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰

#homoose answers #homoose headcannons #🧃 anon

[homoose]

this is random, thought i’d ask you bc i feel you have a very omniscient vibe but what is spencer’s favorite color? like i always thought it was purple but who knows maybe i made that up

I totally agree. I’m pretty sure I wrote it into tmsidk as such as well. he definitely trends toward darker colors (navy, brown, hunter green, etc) in terms of his decorating and work attire and what not but there is no doubt in my mind that that mf loves purple

he is very adventurous in his outfit choices and has a lot of different color combinations that he loves, but I can literally picture the smiles on his face when he’s in his purple sweater and his purple scarf?????? like he’s so happyyyyyyhhyy 🥺😭🥰♥️

#homoose answers #homoose headcannons

[homoose]

Okay! What do you think Spencer favourite pop culture things are? I’m watching Lord of The Rings for the first time and think he would totally be into that, as well as my personal favourite Th West Wing!

okay so we know that in canon he’s shown to love Star Trek and Dr. Who (and I think maybe Star Wars as well?) and I think he would definitely love LOTR.

he also has that one moment where he mentions that he like soap operas which I love LMAO he lives for the drama and the people dying and coming back.

keeping in line with his other interests, I think he’d be really into documentaries of all kinds (although I actually don’t think he’d want to watch murder docs) and also potentially illusionist movies.

I also think he would like movies like Halloweentown and Beetlejuice and The Addams Family and he would watch them year round.

also, we know he loves foreign films, but I think his favorites are foreign language horror films!

#homoose answers #homoose headcannons #I know that I spelled headcanon wrong but it’s too late to change it know #NOW jfc

[homoose]

Do you think that Spencer knows how to cook? Because I see a lot of people that think he burns everything and maybe knows a little bit of baking but I believe that he must know how to cook because of his mother, when they live together.

(and I truly thinks that he sucks at baking)

okay I sort of wrote about this in the EWA verse fics I wrote but I think he’s a good baker! baking is basically science— and there’s not a lot of room for improvisation in terms of the basics. you can’t just be willy nilly with the ingredients. he likes to be able to follow the rules and directions to a tee and the substitutions and flexibility in cooking intimidate him.

I think he honestly probably lived on a lot of TV dinners like this bc they were super cheap and easy. and he probably graduated to these when he got his own place 🤣

#homoose answers #I’m obviously kidding he’s too bougie for hungry man #he prefers stouffer’s or like Amy’s or something #homoose headcannons #i know that i spelled headcanon wrong but it’s too late to change it know

[homoose]

i feel like spence doesnt care for modern music but he absolutely fucks with Hozier. like he even goes so far to by hozier on vinyl for his record player

-🧃

oh yeah absolutely bc he loves the literary references and that it’s basically poetry!!!!! like COME ON:

if I was born as a blackthorn tree, I’d wanna be felled by you, held by you, fuel the pyre of your enemies

AND

and the stench of the sea and the absence of green are the death of all things that are seen and unseen

AND

honey you, you are Atlas in his sleeping and when you move, I'm moved

AND

Be love in its disrepute, scorches the hillside and salts every root

#homoose answers #like come on #hozier #🧃 anon #I could go on and on #homoose headcannons #i know that i spelled headcanon wrong but it’s too late to change it know

[homoose]

Yay on 1k! I’ve had a ton of fun reading as many works of yours as I can because you’re such a fantastic writer with so many perfectly executed concepts! Also, the day you followed me I nearly died in my seat because I was shocked and happy 😊

📝 Ok so who on the team do you think bruises like a peach and who basically doesn’t bruise at all?

🏆 I’m also always looking for fic recs =D

📝 this is so interesting omg 🤣🤣🤣🤣

bruises like a peach:

Spencer— come the fuck on LOOK at him

Morgan— he’s so used to it from all the door kicking and physical contact sports he’s always covered in them but they don’t register

JJ— sort of the same situation as Morgan, she’s used to it from sports and doesn’t even notice them anymore

Kate— I have no reasoning for this I just think it’s true

Matt— I think he’s constantly covered in them from roughhousing with his clan of heathens

Hotch— he’s a soft boi in all respects

does not bruise:

Elle— just, no

Emily— literally made of steel no question; also moves like a cat so avoids them that way

Tara— also made of steel and also is very deliberate in her movements so it’s not usually an issue

Rossi— bruises are afraid of incurring his wrath

Luke— I feel like he should bruise easily but doesn’t????????

Penelope— similar to Luke, looks like she’d bruise easily but has a thick skin and also doesn’t do physical labor bc she makes her men do that

Gideon— pretty sure he wasn’t even real????? ghost bruises maybe

🏆 The One Where Everyone Finds Out by @reidscanehand because the concept is SO COOL and of course they are so well-written as always!!!!!!!!!!!!

#homoose 1k 💎 #homoose headcannons #long post

[homoose]

how do you think spencer would name his daughter?? (no one can convince me he’s not a girl dad)

ok so I’m TERRIBLE at stuff like this, but

I think that he’d like something traditional/old-fashioned? like he’d be into something like Adeline (Addie) or Beatrice (Bea) or Margaret (Maggie)

I think it also might be important for him to have a piece of his mom in his kids’ namesakes? so I think he’d love Diana, even if just for a middle name. or something with some literary significance like Isolde since they read sir Thomas Malory together

#homoose answers #homoose headcannons

[homoose]

i don't know what it is about domestic hcs that shuts my brain down but like,, imagining a night in with spence doing face masks and watching nature documentaries and listening to his commentary on the program,,, oh boy *wipes sweat from brow* (i hope u had a good day~!)

god yeah 🥰

like I know that man is just the chillest at home like it’s his space and he just feels so comfy and safe ☺️

he’s curated such a warm, calm space where he’s able to just be himself and you are a big part of that space 🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺

he loves the face masks and moisturizing socks and eye gels and lip scrubs and just the way his whole body feels smooth and soft and refreshed after

and you KNOW that mf loves a good documentary even though he knows more than the goddamn narrator most of the time and you honestly just watch it on mute half the time so he can give you the most interesting tidbits he knows

bonus points for a lil snacky snacks and hot cocoa

#homoose answers #homoose headcannons