cast me in a better light
pairing: musical actor!Joshua x pit orchestra member!YN
word count: 5.9k
synopsis: Joshua is a great singer and actor, you can admit that, but would it kill him to have some rhythm? The Christmas musical really will fail if you can't figure out how to read his cues, but he's wondering if you'll ever realize that he's sending you a different kind of signal, too.
genre/themes: romance, fluff, grumpy/sunshine dynamic, allusions to a bad breakup, hallmarkian romance, lol.
a/n: this is part of the @svthub snowventeen collab! you should check out all of the other wonderful writers & stories!
also these are the songs i drew inspo & lyrics from (don't sue me)
griff - on foot in front of the other
ariana grande - santa tell me (slow & reverb)
You balled your free hand into a fist as you turned back in your sheet music for what felt like the thirteenth time. It was your third rehearsal with the cast for this year’s Christmas musical and you were wondering if you could get away with strangling the lead, Joshua Hong, with your bare hands. You weren’t even working on anything difficult, but this man could not seem to sneak through a back alley with any sort of consistent rhythm pattern, so consequently you had nothing to follow. Your beats on the high toms kept missing his footsteps and everyone’s patience was wearing thin.
“Joshua, YN?” Janet cleared their throat, “Can you two spend some time together working on this? We need to either decide on a set tempo or work out some visual cues so that YN can follow your footsteps. We do need to move on for today though.”
“Of course!” Joshua smiled brightly at the orchestra conductor, “We’ll make time!” he gestured theatrically in a way that made you want to throw your drumsticks at him.
“Great,” Janet nodded at him before looking back down at the score, “Alright, let’s continue,” they lifted their baton, leading the pit through the second number.
“You still want to do dinner?” you asked Tetiana as she packed up her violin and bow.
“Yes! Although…,” she trailed off, pointing to something behind you.
Furrowing your brows, you turned slowly to see your one and only leading man, Joshua Hong. It was highly unusual to see cast members down in the pit.
“Hey YN! Thought I’d get your number so we can coordinate a few practices to nail down the walks,” he smiled at you.
“Ah sure,” you nodded. None of this would be necessary if he could just walk like a human person.
“Do you have regular days that work well? Or what do you think?”
“To be honest, my schedule is pretty irregular,” you answered honestly, thinking through the various jobs that you had lined up over the next couple of weeks. “I have a chunk of time free on Thursday between two and three pm?”
“That should work! I’ll text you to confirm,” he nodded, running through his own schedule in his head.
“Sounds good,” you raised your eyebrows at him, “Don’t get lost on the way out,” you couldn’t help but tease.
Joshua either didn’t hear you or didn’t respond as he walked backstage, but Tetiana laughed at your joke, which was enough to satisfy you.
“Ready to eat?” you asked her with a smile.
“Yes,” she laughed heartily. She wondered just how difficult of a time Joshua was in for during these one on one sessions.
❄❄❄
“Why can’t we just do a simple 2/4 or 4/4 pace when you walk from stage left to the alley?” you asked, slightly irritated already.
“Because it’s not what the character would do,” Joshua rebutted, as if what he was saying made any sense. “And depending on the show, the atmosphere may be different, so I want to leave it open for interpretation!”
“I-,” you cut yourself off, remembering your conductor’s words. “Okay, well then can we implement some sort of physical cue? Like a shoulder movement or something? I need to be able to follow you,” you suggested.
“Can you just watch how I move and see if there are any physical cues that I'm already doing?”
“Sure,” you sighed, gesturing for him to do his walk.
You watched him closely, eyes traveling from his shoulders to his fingertips and then back up to his torso, hoping to pick out some sort of movement that corresponded to his footsteps. You’d never seen Joshua at such a close distance before. From the pit, he was little more than the rough outline of a person, but up close you were forced to acknowledge how handsome he was. As you watched him move, you also realized that Joshua was much broader than you would’ve guessed. You were surprised when the thought hit you. Things were certainly easier when you watched him from a distance.
“Well?” he asked, turning his head to look at you after completing his exaggerated walk.
“Sorry, can you do it again?” you asked, shaking your head briefly to clear your thoughts.
“Yes,” he nodded, moving to start again.
You crossed your arms, tongue dragging across your teeth as you regarded him. Without even having to look, Joshua could feel your eyes rake up and down his figure as he walked and walked and walked. Your eyes burned into him intently and for someone who was a professional performer, he was surprised to find himself somehow nervous. Your tongue toyed with your left canine until you finally noticed that there was this little thing that he did with his chin just before he took a step. You might be able to work with that.
“Okay, I think I got something!” you clapped your hands together in relief, moving to the keyboard that was set up across the room from your drumset. “Okay, can we take it from here?” your fingers played out the closing melody that directly preceded his walk.
“Oh, yes?” Joshua did a double take. The way your fingers ran across the keys took him by surprise. “You play piano as well?”
“I’m a professional musician,” you wrinkled your nose up at him, “I can play several instruments.”
“Ah, of course,” he flushed.
You keyed out the melody again, leading him into his walk. He waited for you to cross the room to pick up your drumsticks before he started walking and you half-managed to follow his footsteps this time.
“That was better,” you shrugged, “We’ll need to keep working at it though,” you shrugged, eyeing the clock. You had to leave soon if you wanted to make it to band rehearsal on time.
“Oh right, you had to stop at three,” Joshua nodded, following your line of sight.
“Yeah,” you shrugged. The hour had passed quickly, most of it spent bickering, unfortunately. “When are you free next?”
“Saturday is pretty open as of now,” you suggested. “Would ten-thirty in the morning work?”
“Yes!”
“Would you mind actually meeting at my house? I have band practice right before and it would be nice not to have to drive here and set everything up.”
“Oh, sure I guess? What’s the address?”
“I’ll text you,” you smiled gratefully as you packed your drumsticks away, “Have a good day!”
❄❄❄
Joshua double checked the address before he got out of his car. He was halfway to the porch when the sound of music out back caught his ear. He was quite early and figured it wouldn’t do any harm to check it out. As he got closer to the source, the sounds of keyboard, drumset, and guitar became more individually discernible and these ensemble sounds worked together to complement the lead vocalist. Was this the band rehearsal that you had been referring to?
Joshua finally rounded the corner of the house to face a detached garage where the band was rehearsing. His eyes went to the drumset first, where he expected to see you. The large man seated behind the bass drum, however, was decidedly not you and so his eyes flitted around until they landed on the person standing behind the keyboard. You were playing and singing with such joy on your face and it made him stop in his tracks.
“I didn't think I'd get back up
I didn't think I'd be alright again
You know it's easy when you're young, bounce back and whatever
You just bounce back like it never happened”
You sang with your eyes closed, fingers gliding across the keyboard with an ease that startled Joshua.
“I put one foot in front of the other today
I stretched my arms out wide and it felt real strange
And then my legs, they started shaking and my hands, they started quaking
'Cause things just take longer to heal these days”
The tenderness with which you sang the last lyrics triggered a small burst of warmth in his chest and when your eyes opened to meet his, his heart jumped fully into his throat.
“Oh, you’re here,” you blurted into the mic without thinking, surprising your band mates.
“Hi, yes,” Joshua cleared his throat, “Sorry I’m early!” he waved at everyone good naturedly.
“Who is this?” your bassist, Elena asked, eyes dancing curiously at you.
“Joshua, he’s the lead in that musical I’m working,” you shrugged, for some reason embarrassed that he had seen you singing.
“Oh nice!” your drummer stood up to introduce himself, “I’m Amir, and that’s Elena. It’s nice to meet you man!”
“Hey thanks! Nice to meet you too,” Joshua smiled back at the large man, “I didn’t know you sang,” he remarked at you.
“I mean…we barely know each other,” you couldn’t help but remark.
“I guess that’s true,” he chuckled good naturedly, “You guys sound great!”
“Thank you” Elena chirped excitedly, “You should follow us on social media!”
“Please,” Joshua nodded way too genuinely, pulling out his phone and looking over Elena’s shoulder as she showed him the band’s various handles.
You knew that didn’t make any sense. You should want everyone and their mother to check out your music, but there had always been an unspoken separation between the cast members and pit orchestra and so it felt very odd to be letting Joshua into your life in this way.
“Do you wanna take that again,” Amir asked you, bringing your thoughts back to the present, “Or did you feel good about that?”
“I felt really good about that, actually,” you nodded and you meant it.
“Me too!” Elena chirped in agreement.
“Cool, well we’re done a little early so if you two need to work on whatever you need to work on, we can make ourselves scarce. But…,” Amir turned his eyes to Joshua hopefully, “If you might wanna jam with us…Elena and I have been learning ‘My Shot’ from Hamilton!”
“Oh hell yes,” Joshua answered seamlessly.
“Right on!” Amir nodded excitedly, sitting back down behind his drum set as Elena wiggled excitedly.
You gestured towards the microphone stand as you got out of the way for Joshua. He pulled the mic out of the stand and your jaw dropped when he started…rapping?
“Hey yo, I'm just like my country
I'm young, scrappy and hungry
And I'm not throwin' away my shot”
Amir’s grin grew wider and wider as he picked up on Joshua’s flow. You watched, eyes widening with amazement, as he just continued and continued. You knew it was a silly stereotype, but you didn’t ever think you’d see him rapping and you were surprised at how decent he was at it. You could tell that he was out of his usual element, but he managed to still have a swagger and presence that was quite different from when you’d seen him during rehearsal. Elena’s delight grew unbridled as they ran through a good amount of the track before Joshua ran out of breath.
“Sorry!” he laughed apologetically, “I don’t typically rap,” he smiled genially.
“No, don’t apologize man, that was awesome!” Amir shook his head vehemently.
You grinned as you watched the three of them bond. Amir and Elena had always had such open and welcoming personalities, so it didn’t surprise you that they connected with Joshua immediately.
“Of all the things I never thought I’d see,” you remarked as you looked at him with a newfound appreciation.
“I mean we barely know each other, right?” he couldn’t help but throw your own words back at you. He must’ve been still reestablishing his blood oxygen equilibrium, because there was no other explanation for why he winked at you.
You blinked.
“Well, we ought to get out of your hair cause we’ve probably eaten into enough of your rehearsal time,” Amir spoke up after exchanging a glance with Elena. They both packed up quickly and made themselves scarce as you settled in behind the drumset, adjusting the stool way, way down.
“That was fun,” Joshua smiled at you as you warmed up.
“You were perfectly on beat there! So if you could just do that while you walk,” you teased, eyes creasing as you smiled at him. Joshua opened his mouth, but you cut him off, “I know, I know, that’s not what the character would do,” you shook your head playfully at him.
You were pleasantly surprised that the next hour passed quickly. It was probably because Amir and Elena had helped break the ice a little bit, but you felt a lot more comfortable with Joshua today. In turn, he also seemed more open to your input and you were able to work out a decent system for establishing a walking or transition pace. Eventually, you got bored and worked on a few other passages before your stomach interrupted with a loud rumble.
“Was that your stomach?” Joshua asked, surprise evident on his face.
“Yes,” you laughed sheepishly, “I should eat something. Do you want to take a break? I’ve probably got something we can snack on.”
“I wouldn’t mind a snack,” Joshua smiled at you in a way that was disarming.
“Okay, follow me then,” you turned away, nervous, allowing him to follow you, “Don’t judge me, I know the place is a mess!” you disclaimed as you led him through the house. Joshua’s eyes widened with wonder as he inventoried the many, many instrument cases scattered around your house.
“How many instruments can you play?” he looked at you in wonder.
“I, uh,” you made a face as you counted in your head. “All of the strings and most of the percussion instruments.”
“What? That’s amazing!” Joshua gaped at you. He was truly impressed.
“Thanks,” you chuckled, a bit shy at his obvious admiration. Avoiding his gaze, you searched through your cupboard for something to eat.
“Can I try this?” Joshua gestured to the cello laying on the ground while you slid two frozen waffles into the toaster.
“Sure!” you called over your shoulder as you moved to the fridge. Waffles and cereal it was! You laughed to yourself as you heard some fiddling followed by a few noisy scrapes.
“This sounds horrible,” he remarked to himself as he continued to drag the bow across the strings determinedly. You couldn’t fight the smile that spread across your lips as you watched him out of the corner of your eye. You were surprised that you still found him endearing as he continued to make such grating sounds.
“You’ll have to adjust the pin,” you gestured to the bottom of the cello as you approached him, assessing the situation. “Here, hold this for me,” you lifted the instrument to the appropriate height and waited for Joshua to grab the instrument. You reached down between his legs and pulled the endpin out so that the cello sat at a better height.
“Okay, that looks better, now let’s address this grip,” you smiled, grabbing his hand and adjusting his fingers so they held the bow in a less awkward way. You didn’t notice, but Joshua’s Adam’s apple bobbed erratically when you moved to adjust his other hand on the neck of the cello. “You might actually be good at the cello,” you remarked, taking his left hand into your own. “You have these nice long fingers!”
Before he could respond, the waffles jumped in the toaster, pulling your attention away. It was just as well, because the best Joshua could’ve offered was a garbled cough with the way you had managed to fluster him. Blinking rapidly, he stood, placing the cello back on its side.
In the kitchen, you reprimanded yourself mentally as you placed the toasted waffles onto plates. Joshua did have nice hands, but you certainly didn’t need to be saying that out loud! Wordlessly, you brought everything to the kitchen table and gestured for him to sit.
“Hope you like Cap’n Crunch,” you laughed, “It’s the best I can do with no notice.
“I love Cap’n Crunch,” he smiled genuinely, “So do you teach as well?” he asked between mouthfuls. You nodded and worked through your own mouthful of cereal before answering him.
“Yes! I teach a handful of students, mostly string instruments.”
“Wow, that is really amazing,” Joshua beamed at you one more time before you ate in silence. The crunch of the cap’n filled the room and you were struck by the odd sense of intimacy that filled the moment. You wondered if it was one sided before you finished up and resumed practice
❄❄❄
Joshua couldn’t keep his eyes from wandering to you in the pit. You were laughing easily with some of the other musicians and he was surprised at the way he felt almost jealous? It made sense, of course, you knew them much better than you knew him. Prior to this show, you’d never even interacted, but after spending some time with you over the weekend, Joshua had had a lot of trouble keeping you out of his mind.
“Ready to get started?” Janet tapped their baton against their music stand.
Everyone directed their attention to the podium and flipped to one of the big dance numbers. It was quick and before long you were deeply immersed, trying to keep time with their steps.
“Very good, nice work!” Janet clapped happily, more than pleased. “Joshua and YN, great job nailing down the transitions as well! They’re looking much better.”
You smiled back, pleased as well. Joshua instinctively looked towards where he knew you were, even though it was too dark to see you anymore.
“Hey, YN!” you heard Joshua’s now familiar voice as you were on the way out of rehearsal.
“Hey, nice job today,” you smiled at him.
“Thanks to you,” he felt inordinately pleased to receive your compliment. “Hey if you’re not busy, do you want to grab some coffee?”
“I’m not, but why?” you asked.
“I-, do I have to have a reason?” he paused, furrowing his brow.
“I mean, I guess not but this is a little unusual. The cast members typically don’t acknowledge our existence,” you chuckled. You were probably being a little unfair, but this was also true.
“Well, you’re not exactly making it easy,” he pushed back, raising an eyebrow.
“…Fair point,” you had to admit. “You’re right. Let’s go get coffee.”
Joshua beamed.
“I like Almanac, but where do you like for coffee?”
“I like Almanac too!” Joshua’s eyebrows raised in surprise, “See we’re more similar than you give us credit for.”
“I already admitted I was being unfair,” you raised your brows at him, heading towards your favorite coffee shop.
“So how was the rest of your weekend?”
“It was pretty busy, but good! Yours?”
“It was also good,” Joshua smiled. You watched the way the corners of his lips curled up in a catlike fashion. “I had some free time after our practice, so I went to visit my mom.”
“Oh, nice! Does she live close? Far?”
“A couple of hours away, so it’s not too far. She’s getting a little older now, so I try to visit regularly and help around the house however I can.”
“That’s sweet of you,” you smiled. Joshua had always seemed like a gentleman and this was consistent with that.
“It’s the right thing to do,” he shrugged, opening the door to Almanac for you.
“YN!” the roaster, Sam, greeted you, “And Josh?” He did a double take when Joshua followed you inside. “Do you two know each other?”
“We do!” Joshua nodded, “You weren’t kidding when you said you like it here, huh?”
“I take my coffee very seriously,” you threw him a pointed yet playful look. “What’s interesting today?” you turned back to Sam.
“For you? I think you’ll like the Burundi best? Very juicy and complex,” he regarded you for a second. “And for you, Joshua? I think the Honduras? Nutty and more chocolatey notes.”
You and Joshua both nodded. When it came to coffee with Sam, you’d both learned that it was always best to go with dealer’s choice.
“Do we want these for here or to go?”
“I, uh…?” you looked at Joshua, this had been his idea to begin with.
“Here?” he suggested, hoping you didn’t feel obligated.
“Sure,” you shrugged.
“So how do you two know each other?” Sam asked as he bounced around behind the bar, grinding beans and prepping pour overs.
“We’re both in the Christmas show,” Joshua answered first, gesturing vaguely towards the theater where you’d just walked from.
“Well, he’s in it. I’m in the pit orchestra,” you felt the need to clarify.
“You’re in it! There’s no musical without the orchestra!” he insisted enthusiastically.
“I would agree with that,” Sam chuckled, intrigued at your dynamic.
“You know what I mean though!” you scrunched your face at Joshua, “If you say ‘I’m in a musical’ people think you mean the cast!”
Joshua blinked down at you. His lips curled up at the corners, amused at your fervor. Sam watched with a grin on his face as you and Joshua bickered playfully.
“Okay, here’s your coffee kids,” he finally interrupted, sliding two ceramic cups across the bar.
“Thanks Sam,” you beamed at him before turning to search out a table. It wasn’t terribly busy, so you were able to grab seats at the bar looking out the window. “So did you have something you needed to talk to me about?” you asked, shifting slightly to face him.
“No, I just wanted to spend some time with you,” he laughed, leaning back in his chair.
“What?”
“What?” he asked, a little confused that he kept having to explain why he wanted to be around you. You were incredibly talented and interesting, did you not see that?
“Sorry I’m not good at making new friends,” you chuckled wryly.
“You’re okay,” Joshua smiled. “I was actually hoping to ask you about your music making process. If you don’t mind.”
“Oh?” your eyes lit up. This was a topic that you could talk both of his ears off about, if he let you.
“Yes, I was wondering who writes your lyrics and whether you have a process for it. Like lyrics first and then music or vice versa?”
“That’s a good question that’s impossible to answer,” you grinned at him. “Amir and Elena and I tend to each write our own tracks, but we do ask each other for input. For me, I write the lyrics first and fill in the music around them. Elena is the opposite and Amir does both, depending on his mood. Do you write music?”
“I have tried in the past. But I’m primarily a vocalist, so I never really got to the part about filling in the music,” he chuckled sheepishly. “I can get by on guitar, but that’s about it.”
“It’s certainly not easy,” you laughed, “And then there’s the issue of baring your heart and soul to the people who do actually listen.”
Joshua enjoyed the way your eyes sparkled as you talked excitedly about your music making process. You didn’t seem to like to talk about yourself otherwise, so he hoped he could learn more about you through your music. Your next show was already marked down in his calendar and he couldn’t wait for the day to come.
“Sorry I’m talking your ear off!” you chuckled, bringing your mug to your lips.
“I like it,” his eyes creased as he smiled at you, resting his chin on his hand, eager to hear more.
You blinked. His statement was so straightforward and caught you off guard. You weren’t able to fight the heat that crawled up your neck, so you pretended it was a win that you hadn’t choked on your coffee entirely.
“Oh my gosh, I have to get going,” Joshua’s eyes widened when he noticed the time.
“Oh, okay!” you nodded. “Sorry, I told you I could talk forever about this!”
“Don’t be sorry. Time passes easily with you.”
“This was fun, thanks for suggesting it,” you stepped past his compliment and through the door purposefully. “Oh, it’s snowing!” you gasped, extending your palms upwards to catch a few flakes.
“Pretty,” he murmured, eyes watching you as snowflakes landed in your hair.
“It really is,” you turned towards him, fully beaming now. You loved being outside for the first snow each year. You and Joshua exchanged a laden glance before you couldn’t stand it anymore and excused yourself. It was cold out, but you almost couldn’t feel it.
❄❄❄
“Are you gonna sing tonight?” Elena asked you, eyes bright with curiosity. You tended to be fifty-fifty when it came to karaoke night. Sometimes you were in the mood and other times you weren’t. Tonight you were decidedly on the fence, so you planned to just go with the flow.
“Not sure yet, but I am here to support you,” you grinned, nose scrunching affectionately at her. “Is Amir coming?”
“Yeah, but he invited someone else so he’s waiting outside,” Elena nodded.
“Oh, okay!” you shrugged. It wasn’t unheard of for others to join you, but it wasn’t frequent either. You wandered to the bar to grab a beer while you waited.
“Yo!” you jumped slightly when Amir’s booming voice was accompanied by his hands clapping down on your shoulders.
“Jeebus,” you scrunched your face up at him.
“Two pilsners, please?” he signaled to the bartender before pulling you into a hug. “How’s things?” he asked as you headed back towards Elena.
“Pretty good! How are yo-oh?” you stopped mid-sentence when you saw Joshua sitting with her.
“Hey,” he smiled gently, waving at you.
“What are you doing here?”
“I invited him!” Amir stated as a matter of factly as he took the seat next to Elena at the picnic style table. You climbed over the bench on the other side, taking the spot next to Joshua.
“We’ve been chatting,” Joshua explained helpfully.
“Oh,” you nodded, though you were full of questions, “It’s good to see you.”
“You too,” he nodded, left knee nudging yours under the table.
Your heart flipped in your chest. You hadn’t seen Joshua since your post-rehearsal coffee, but he’d certainly been on your mind. If you squinted, in the right light, you would almost think that he was interested in you. But then again, you’d also thought things with your last partner had been going well just before they’d broken up with you too.
“What are you singing?” you asked, pulling yourself out of your thoughts.
“Well it has to be holiday themed, so that narrows down our choices,” Amir stroked his chin playfully.
“Have you decided?” Joshua turned to you, eyes curious.
“I’m not sure I’m going to sing yet,” you half-smiled at him.
“Oh come on! I’ll sing if you sing,” he offered.
“Why would I care if you sing or not?” you countered.
“Hm. You’re telling me you don’t want to watch me make a fool of myself singing Mariah Carey?” he teased, corners of his lips curling up playfully.
“Wait,” you blinked, “Wait, no I really do,” your eyes widened as you processed his words.
“You’d better pony up then,” he threw you a playful look as he brought his beer to his lips.
Elena watched Joshua with severe interest as he watched you wrack your brain for Christmas songs. He was so clearly interested in you, but she couldn’t tell whether your obliviousness was purposeful or not.
“What about ‘Santa Tell Me’?” she suggested, electing to help you out of your misery.
“Oh! I do like that song!” you smiled at Elena gratefully, “Will that do?” you turned to Joshua, an eyebrow raised expectantly at him.
You honestly expected him to say no and request a rendition of something much more embarrassing, so you were caught off guard when he cocked his head to the side and raked his eyes over you before nodding. Elena’s eyes widened before they flew to Amir to see whether he’d been paying attention to this exchange. As was typical, he seemed blissfully unaware as he drank his beer.
“Do we sign up? Or how does this work?” Joshua asked, craning his neck towards the MC.
“Yep, they have a sign-up sheet there!” Amir nodded.
“Shall we?” Joshua turned to you, extending his hand towards you.
“We?” you couldn’t help the question that escaped your lips.
“I don’t trust you not to chicken out. I would like to watch you put pen to paper,” he grinned mischievously at you.
“Me? Chicken?” you gasped, offended. “I would never!”
“Then let’s go,” Joshua chuckled cooly.
“Fine,” you scoffed, placing your hand in his and following him to the MC’s station.
“Amir!” Elena squealed as she watched you leave. “I think something’s going on?”
“Oh yeah, Joshua likes YN,” Amir shrugged, nodding as if it wasn’t a big deal.
“Wait, what?”
“He told me. Why do you think I invited him?”
Elena’s mouth hung wide open at this revelation. Of all the things she never thought she’d see, Amir meddling was pretty damn near top of the list.
“Am I going first or are you?” you asked Joshua as you held the pen above the sign-up sheet.
“I’ll go first,” he shrugged good naturedly, “It was my idea after all.”
“Okay,” you nodded, scribbling his name and then your own just below it, “No backing out now.”
“Wouldn’t dream of it,” he winked at you. He couldn’t seem to help himself from teasing you tonight.
You watched, fascinated, as Joshua chatted with Elena and Amir. You’d have thought they’d known each other for years, but when you sat down to do the math, you were surprised to realize that it had really only been a few weeks since they’d met. It was a pleasant surprise, but a surprise nonetheless. Pulling yourself out of your thoughts again, you met Elena’s gaze, which was loaded to say the least. When she realized you were no longer spacing out, her eyebrows raised as her head jerked subtly, yet meaningfully, towards Joshua. You knew what she was saying and you maybe even agreed. You just needed to have another mental breakdown or two before you decided what you wanted to do about it.
“Oh, I’m next!” Joshua announced as he watched names on the screen flicker by.
“Break a leg,” you beamed at him. He faltered for a moment at the genuine openness of your smile.
You watched with a mixture of excitement and secondhand embarrassment as Joshua started his rendition of Mariah Carey’s ‘All I Want for Christmas Is You’. It was stupid, but you were surprised at how good he was. He didn’t take himself too seriously, hammed it up when it was appropriate, and by the end of it you were smiling widely and singing along. In fact, you were enjoying yourself so much that you practically forgot you were meant to sing after him and rushed on stage at the last minute. Joshua handed you the mic with a playful chuckle, fingers brushing for just a moment.
“Santa, tell me if you're really there
Don't make me fall in love again if he won't be here next year
Santa, tell me if he really cares
'Cause I can't give it all away if he won't be here next year”
Joshua smiled as he watched you sing. He wasn’t surprised that this song resonated with you. While perusing your music, it had become apparent to him that you’d gone through a big breakup sometime in the last year. He could certainly understand the reluctance to get involved with someone new, but he also hoped that he could prove himself to be a steadfast friend and potential partner.
You smiled impossibly wide as you grooved to the background music; you really did love this song! Inevitably your eyes moved back to your table and you paused when Joshua caught your eye. His eyes had creased into semi-circles and his lips had curled up just slightly at the corners as he watched you. Your brain stuttered and for whatever reason, the next lyrics that left your lips were from the explicit version instead.
“Oh, I wanna let him unwrap me, like oh-woo-oh
Get on top of him, by that fireplace, oh-woo-oh
But I don't want a new broken heart
This year I've got to be smart”
Joshua’s eyes widened in surprise as the crowd erupted in whoops and cheers. The way you’d held his gaze while singing had left his heart pounding wildly in his chest.
“Eee, you did so good!” Elena squealed excitedly when you returned to the table. It took every fiber of her being not to scream over your sudden improv. “I love that slowed version too.”
“Really good,” Joshua half-smiled, thinking furiously about when and whether to make a move.
“Thanks,” you giggled shyly, grateful for the residual adrenaline of performing. “When are you two up? I kinda want to go out and get some air, but I don’t want to miss you guys!”
“We’re not for a while, go for it! Bring us some beers back too,” Amir waved you away playfully.
“Okay, I’ll be back soon!” you waved briefly before heading out the door to the patio.
The gears continued to turn in Joshua’s head until Amir and Elena simply couldn’t take it anymore.
“Dude, what are you doing?” they demanded in unison.
“What?” Joshua looked up, slightly startled.
“Go get ‘em! Now’s your chance!”
“Now?!” He looked panicked.
“They wanna let you unwrap them, like oh-woo-oh,” Elena sang playfully at him.
“Get on top of you, by that fireplace, oh-woo-oh!” Amir harmonized before breaking out into a fit of giggles.
Joshua stood up. They were right, this was the opening. He headed towards the door he had seen you exit through and found you standing outside alone.
“Gah, I don’t know how you do it!” you started chattering when you saw him, “I still get such nerves about performing in front of crowds like that!”
“It doesn’t really ever go away,” he smiled reassuringly, stepping towards you. “Cold?” he asked, watching you blow warm air on your hands.
“I was hoping the fresh air would help me calm down a bit, but now I’m just cold,” you laughed sheepishly.
Joshua chuckled, folding his long fingers over your hands and pulling you towards him. You swallowed audibly as you looked at him, heart pounding even faster now.
“You are a captivating performer and a talented musician. The nerves never really go away, you’ll just get better at managing them,” he gazed deep into your eyes. “You made me feel a lot of feelings up there.”
“Oh?”
“Yeah, I’m not sure I’ve heard that version before,” he teased, grinning at you.
“I didn’t-, I don’t,” you floundered, but you didn’t really have much of an explanation. You had simply been flirting with him and he was flirting back.
“Can we go out on a date?” he asked, “If things go according to plan, we’ll be here next year too.”
You fought the urge to roll your eyes as you realized he was quoting your karaoke lyrics back to you. It was so corny and yet…it was working. You pushed up on the balls of your feet, leveraging his grip on your hands to pull him into a kiss. You could feel him smile against your lips and when you pulled away, you could see that a single snowflake had landed on his nose. What in the Hallmark movie?
❄❄❄
Thanks so much for reading! Would love to hear what you think and please also check out the other 'snowventeen' fics!
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Ch. 5: Checking Fence
Disclaimer: This is a work of fan fiction using characters from the Top Gun: Maverick world, trademarked by Paramount Pictures Corporation. I do not claim ownership of the characters and the world that I am borrowing.
The story and situation I am creating are a work of my imagination and I do not ascribe them to official story canon. This work is for entertainment only and is not a part of the storyline.
I am not profiting financially from the creation and publication of this story, but I do hope it gives you happy thoughts.
These stories are my own, so please do not take them and use them for yourself without my permission. If you see them somewhere else, please let me know. :)
With the two of you mounted on your horses, you set off down a dirt road towards the north field.
"I'm surprised no one has snatched you up yet," Jake commented out of the blue.
'If you only knew,' you thought to yourself. "Nah. I love my job too much," you replied, gazing ahead before turning to look at him. "What about you?"
Jake looked ahead, his expression thoughtful. "I've thought about it, but my job keeps me busy. Maybe one day." He glanced at you with a small smile. "Who knows, right?"
You nodded in agreement, appreciating the simplicity of the moment. The rhythmic sound of the horses' hooves against the dirt road, the warm sun overhead, and the gentle breeze all contributed to the serenity of the day. It was moments like these that made you appreciate the beauty of life.
As you approached the gate leading to the north field, Jake spoke up, "I'll get the gate if you grab my horse and walk her in."
"Sure," you reply, taking the reins from Jake as he dismounts to open the gate. After he swings it open, you lead both horses inside. Jake follows and then secures the gate behind you.
He mounts back onto his horse, and you pass him the reins. As your hands briefly touch, there's a warm connection that you can't help but notice, but you ignore it and turn to look at the fence.
"Well, let's get this started," you declare, turning your horse and beginning to ride alongside the fence.
Jake sighs, slightly frustrated, and falls into line behind you.
The north field held a special place in your heart, mainly because of the small creek that meandered through it. When you were younger, it served as your sanctuary when you needed a break from everything. It was also the very spot where you shared your first kiss and lost your virginity to Jake. It suddenly struck you that this was likely why James had asked you to check the fence, and you quietly shook your head with a sigh.
You looked at your watch and then at Jake. "You hungry? We can eat here?"
Jake looked around. "Yeah. It's been awhile since I've been here."
"Let's head over by the tree," you suggested, steering your horse in that direction, with Jake following suit. When you reached the tree, you dismounted your horse and grabbed the blanket from the back of the saddle.
"I'll get things set up," Jake announced mysteriously from behind you. As he reached up, you caught a new scent, one you didn't recognize from years ago. Back in high school, he used to smell like Drakkar Noir. Now, there was a distinct manly aroma of bourbon and leather, with a subtle undertone of fresh hay.
He had already secured his horse to the tree, so you did the same. Meanwhile, he spread out a blanket beside the creek and fetched the basket from behind his saddle, placing it on the blanket.
After securing your horse, you made your way over to the blanket. Jake extended his hand towards you, and you looked at it, then at him.
"Let me help you," he said with a charming grin.
You returned the smile, placed your hand in his, and settled down onto the blanket. Jake followed suit, sitting beside you.
The serene babble of the creek and the distant rustle of leaves created a soothing backdrop to your picnic. Griff had packed an assortment of sandwiches, fruit, and some homemade lemonade. The simple spread seemed to suit the day perfectly.
As you both sat there, enjoying the food and the natural surroundings, you couldn't help but feel a sense of contentment.
"Thanks for helping me today, Jake," you said, taking a sip of lemonade.
He smiled warmly, his eyes reflecting the same sentiment. "You're welcome. Sometimes, it's good to slow down a bit, you know?"
You shrug. "Life is much simpler and slower in Alaska. I love it."
"It sounds like it. Coronado is always bustling. Hell, Top Gun school keeps you on your toes."
"And you enjoy it?"
He grinned widely. "I love it! I just wish..." His voice trailed off.
You locked eyes with him. "You wish what?"
He held your gaze. "I wish you were there to share it all with me."
His words hung in the air, carrying a mix of longing and vulnerability. The sincerity in his gaze caught you off guard, and for a moment, you were lost in his green eyes. But then you looked away, the memory of that day rushing back:
"Marry me, Y/N," Jake had said, dropping down on one knee at the edge of the creek. "I want you with me for the rest of my life."
You beamed. "Yes!" you exclaimed excitedly. He stood and slipped the ring onto your finger, then cradled your face, drawing you in for a kiss. It was tender, passionate, and full of love.
When you returned to the house and showed your mom, your dad stormed into the room, furious:
"You will not marry him, young lady!" he bellowed.
"Daddy! It's Jake! You've known him all of his life!"
"I don't care! You're not eighteen."
"But I will be in two months!"
"Well, until that time, you live in my house under my roof, and I'm responsible for you."
"What did Jake ever do to you?" He's always helped when we needed it. Even when we didn't!"
"He's cocky and full of himself. He needs to learn that not everything is going to go his way."
Tension hung in the air as your father's stern words echoed through the room. You couldn't believe the intensity of his reaction. It felt like a cruel twist of fate that just as things seemed to be falling into place, this sudden obstacle appeared.
"But Dad, we love each other," you pleaded, desperation creeping into your voice.
Your mother, who had been observing the exchange, stepped forward, trying to mediate. "Honey, maybe we should talk about this calmly. Jake is a good boy, and we've known him for years."
But your father's stance remained firm. "No. She's my daughter, and I know what's best for her. She will not marry him."
You ran up to your bedroom, tears streaming down your face.
"I came asking for you that night," Jake said, breaking your train of thought.
You looked at him, puzzled. "What?" you said, feeling a rush of confusion. "I was in my room. I'd put my headphones on because my parents were arguing about us. I cried myself to sleep. Nothing was ever mentioned that you had stopped by."
Jake's eyes widened in surprise and realization. "Y/N, I had no idea. I thought you didn't want to see me. At least, that's what your dad told me."
You shook your head, a mixture of emotions washing over you. "I had no idea you came. I thought you'd given up on us too."
"Your father said I wasn't good enough for you. I needed to learn a lesson."
"I thought you just left."
He gazed at you. "God no. But he was right. I needed to learn. I was too cocky. I was sent to Top Gun to train for a mission. I didn't get it because I said and did some things that, now looking back on it, I should've listened to my instructor. I've learned." He reached out and touched the side of your face. "I've had so many girls throw themselves at me, but no one could compare to you. Even after all this time." He slowly pulled your face towards him and the next thing you knew, his lips were on yours.
You closed your eyes, tasting his mouth. He tasted of bourbon and brown sugar. A nice combination.
The kiss was a rush of emotions, a culmination of years of longing and missed opportunities. It was tender yet passionate, a promise of what could have been and what still might be. As you held each other, it felt like a second chance, a shot at rewriting the past.
When you finally pulled away, your foreheads touched, breathless and hearts pounding. The weight of the years seemed to lift, leaving behind a renewed hope and a sense of closure.
"Jake," you whispered, your voice barely above a breath.
His gaze locked onto yours, his eyes filled with a mixture of love and determination. "Y/N, I promise you, I've changed. I want to make things right, if you'll give me the chance."
You smiled, a tear rolling down your cheek. "I'd like that, Jake. I really would, but..." You wiped the tears off of your face and quickly stood up. "We need to finish checking the fence."
"Y/N."
You started to place things into the basket and Jake gently grabbed your hand, stopping you. "Would you talk to me?"
You looked at him, your eyes full of sorrow. "You don't want me, Jake. It's too late for us. Too much has changed."
"Y/N, I get that, but can we..."
"No." You cut him off. "Let's just get this done," you said as you filled the basket and then placed it on the back of Jake's horse. You then went over to your horse and acted like you were checking your horses saddle straps as Jake rolled up the blanket and then placed it behind the saddle on your horse. You refused to look at him.
"Let's get going then, shall we?" He mounted his horse and you did the same.
The sun was starting to set as the two of you rode upon the ranch. After the kiss at lunch, the two of you rode in silence, only talking when a part of the fence needed to be fixed.
As you came upon the barn, you noticed another vehicle parked in the driveway and wondered who it was. One of the new farmhands took your horse after you dismounted and Jake continued to ride his until you were at the steps of the back porch.
"There she is!" a male voice rang out as the backdoor opened.
You looked up and saw a blond guy in blue jeans and a blue t-shirt come running down the stairs, and he wrapped his arms around you. You were momentarily surprised before realizing who it was. You also noticed James outside now leaning against the porch rail.
The blond released you and stepped back, grinning. "Your brother said you were out checking a fence."
"I was," you responded.
The blond then noticed Jake, who was still sitting on his horse. "Who is this guy? Another cowboy on the ranch?"
You made the introductions, saying, "Sean, meet Jake. Jake, this is Sean, my fiance."
Sean extended his hand towards Jake. "Pleasure to meet you."
Jake hesitated, glancing at his muddy hands. "I hope you don't mind, they're a bit dirty right now. I'd hate to make a mess of things."
Sean withdrew his hand with a nod. "Of course, I understand."
Your gaze shifted to Jake, who gave you a reassuring nod. "If there's anything else you need, just give me a shout." With that, he rode off.
Turning to Sean, you asked, "Sean, what brings you here?"
"You seemed distressed when we spoke the other day, so I arranged for the Coast Guard to handle our stuff. I wanted to be here with you," he explained.
You sighed. "Let's go in the house. I'm starving."
As you ascended the stairs, James observed with a raised eyebrow.
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