the monkeys
Hi, I'm Moonlight and today, I present to my favourite group of silly middle-aged british men whom I'm obsessed with. I give you the characteristics of the boys which I focus on the most and the names I refer to our arti monkees as; consider this a dictionary <3
I. YELLAM’O DRAWDE SALOHCIN
nicholas edward o'malley
july 5, 1985 (happy birthday n)
oldest of the group, bass and vocals
dvd (deep voice daddy)
“i think that's more a mental health issue than a superstition”
quiet but when he talks, it's 99% proven to be sexual
lives in the basement
background character
goddess amongst man
🐧
eyes eyes eyes
curls curls curls
don't bother him he's just chilling and being a goddess
nicky, NEO (initials), yellamo,
II. EX PORNSTAR
james robert cook
july 8, 1985 (hbd in advance 🍪)
second oldest, rhythm guitar and ex-vocals
legend
unhinged
“jameh don't be a cracko”
will destroy you
chaotic evil
🍪
underrated
red™
screws up on the guitar aLOT
jameh, cookie (-dough/cutter)
III. SIMP
alexander david turner
january 6, 1986 (happy belated birthday m'luv)
second youngest, guitar, songwriter and vocals (also frontman)
becomes a different person every album
shy bbg acting like a bad boy
“you could say they're selling like ghost cookies”
dry
accent 101
dependency issues
sex god
just a sweetheart
fuckable
subby lemur boy
big words
huge nose
pathetic boy charm and autistic tendencies
alix, al, ally, lexi
IV. AGILE BEAST
matthew j. helders iii
may 7, 1986 (happy belated birthday)
youngest, drums and vocals
god
bullied
“I WANNA ROCK AND ROLL”
alex’s babysitter
vlogger
only human who knows technology
precious
▶️
does not age
girl dad
matthew, mattel, god helders
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silly little parallel
jan peteh picture by @/vita_orehek_photography on ig
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