#feed my stuff to AI? die on my sword

[motorcitizens]

ive never seen anywhere to watch motorcity with subs? so i went looking and found transcripts of most of the early mc episodes (available in a reply so tumblr doesnt kill the post) but theyre missing a few towards the end. i decided on my fourth rewatch that id transcribe episode 9! whether youre a hard of hearing fan or just want the reference, here you go! let me know if the initials are annoying, ill edit them out.

-I got you with the slash!

-Nuh-uh!

-You first.

-Why me?

-Cuz you're dead anyway.

-There's nothing down here!

-Philip? S- stop fooling around, man. I- I can hear you down there.

-Aah!

[theme]

-The last time I bought anything from you, it took me a week to fumigate the kitchen!

-Okay, the reshcaps were a mistake, you're right about that. But today, I have something extra special...

D- ...then she says, 'that's why I can't eat the sandwich!'

[all laugh]

C- Wait, wait, I got one. Where does a snowman keep his money? In a snow bank! Eh? Get it? Come on, it's funny!

Th- We're searching for the Vanquisher, king of the realm?

T- Oh. I think they're talking about me.

M- Yeah, I have no idea who you're-

Th- There he is!

Burners- Chuck?!

T- [laughter]

R- Hey! You dare insult Lord Vanquisher? I should take your tongue and feed it to the birds.

T- Uh, you can't do that. I need my tongue.

C- Release him, Darkslayer.

R- ... Fortune smiles upon you today.

M- So, Chuck, you wanna introduce us to your... friends?

C- Guys, allow me to present: Thurman the Magnificent, and Ruby the Darkslayer!

Th: We are knights of the kingdom of Raymanthia.

C- It's called LARPing! [...] Live action role-playing? [...] Okay, I have a life outside of the Burners, you know!

D- Sure doesn't look like it.

T- Oh! I get it! Ahahaha!

Th- My Lord, a situation has arisen. The oracle awaits.

O- As you requested, Sam and Phillip were dispatched on a scouting mission early this morning. But we have not heard from them for many hours.

M- What do you mean you haven't heard from them?

O- I fear, Lord Vanquisher, they have gotten lost on the outskirts of the realm.

T- Texas is confused. Okay, now is this part of your little game or is this real?

D- We're standing behind some dude's van who calls himself the oracle. What do you think?

O- I demand silence!

J- I can't believe I'm saying this, but I'm with Texas on this one.

O- Chuck! Make em stop.

C- Wait. Is this part of the game?

Th- No. Sam and Philip are really missing.

M- So, this is for real?

O- We need your help.

C- I vow to find our wayward kinsmen.

C- Guys, this is LARPing!

T- Woah. That's it?

C- Each weekend, teams battle for control of the realm. The rules are simple: First, once you step onto the field of battle, you must remain in character. Second, if you must be vanquished: do so with honor. It's neat, ain't it?!

J- The game's already started?

R- If by 'game' you mean a ferocious battle to the death for the crown of Raymanthia, then yes.

O- But we can't win unless we find our friends.

[at the same time]

C- I say we split up.

M- Let's split up.

M- No disrespect! Chuck- uh, I mean, Lord Chuck. What do you think we should do?

C- Ahem! If we split up, we'll cover more ground!

O/Th/R- As you say, Lord Vanquisher.

C- Okay guys. We'll check the warehouse near the old Renaissance center, you guys check the battlefield.

Th- I dunno where that is. Can somebody else drive?

M- So, King Chuck. How'd you win your crown?

O- It happened many weekends ago... Chuck stood as freedom's last hope against Mad Dog the Conqueror. If he were to fall, darkness would reign for yet another long weekend. Mad Dog summoned his dragon to finish off the Vanquisher once and for all, but fate had different plans. It was totally awesome!

C- Naw, it wasn't... that awesome.

D- Little dudes!

J- Sam! Phillip?

D- Where are you?

Guy- Huzzah!

R- Leave this to me!

Guy- The bards shall sing of this day... the day the Darkslayer fell!

R- Someone shall fall on this day... but it shall not be me.

[fighting noises]

Guy- Aha! Tsk, tsk. You've lost your sword!

T- hyah!

R- What are you doing! I had him right where I wanted him!

Guy- You're not playing by the rules.

T- These are Texas rules! [karate noises] Now. We need you to answer some questions.

D- We're looking for two missing kids, Sam and Phillip. Have you seen them?

Guy- I'd rather die a thousand deaths than help the likes of you.

J- Ahem! Forgive us, my liege, but we are but humble squires in search of our kinsmen. Can you help us?

Guy- I've never been one to refuse a lady, certainly not one as ravishing as you. Saw your kinsmen five hours ago, approaching the Dungeon of Anguish.

D- Neat trick.

Th- We're never gonna find them in time. Then the stupid Bardonians are gonna win, think they're all cool with their fancy mustaches.

C- Hey. Buck up there, camper! People said we'd never win the Battle Royale last Fall, but we did. Our friends are out there, and we'll find em! We just gotta keep-

M- Uh, sorry. Dutch just called. Your friends were seen someplace called the Dungeon Anguish?

Th- It's actually the Dungeon of Anguish.

C- It's, uh. Well, it's actually just in the basement right here.

C- Wah, ah! Get it off me, get it off me!

Th- This isn't part of the game!

M- Yeah, well, neither is this!

R- That was. Incredible!

D- What were those things?

M- Don't know. But I'm betting they have something to do with our missing friends. We have to move. [LARPers kneel] Uh, come on. Get up, guys, we don't have time for this.

O- From this day forth, you shall be known as "Mike, the Smiling Dragon."

Th- You just got a great name. Jealous!

C- For saving my life on the field of battle, I owe you a debt of life.

M- That's... really not necessary.

O- Actually, it's totally necessary. The king of the realm cannot rule while carrying a debt of life.

C- As such, I give the crown to the Smiling Dragon!

M- No. No, Please, look, I can't, I just- I was-

C- Mikey, you gotta!

J- Hey guys, check this out! I've never seen that symbol before.

D- That's really old.

M- Way before my time. Maybe Jacob can help.

Th- What if those... things have Sam and Phillip?

R- Never fear. We have the Smiling Dragon. As long as he's our king, we can't lose. Did you see his moves? They were just so- so-!

M- You okay, buddy? Look, if it's about what happened back there, I'm sorry man. I was just trying to help.

C- It's not that. It's just-

M- Just what?

C- Look, I tripped, okay?

M- Um... If that's some kind of LARPer slang, I have no idea what it means.

C- The story you heard. About how I earned my crown? That's not how it really... went down. It was my first real battle. I'd never held a real lance before. I was still getting my balance when Lord Mad Dog summoned his dragon... I ran forward but... I tripped. The lance fell and hit him by accident! I won my crown with a lie. Hey... it's better that you're king now. I was never fit for the post. I've been king for 48 consecutive weekends, and-

M- 48? Woah, you do play this game a lot.

C- Yeah, but... it took less than an hour of LARPing with you for the others to see me for what I truly am... a follower.

M- Hey, a follower couldn't have led his team to 48 consecutive victories. You can't fake that!

C- Mikey... Look, I appreciate your support but we both know I'm no leader. Not when I'm a Burner and not even when I'm here, playing make believe.

M- Here. Take the pin back.

C- You can't just give it to me! The only way I can get it back is to earn it by saving your life. And let's be honest. That ain't gonna happen.

Th- Never seen that tunnel before. You aren't planning on taking us down there, are you?

R- Well I'm going in!

Th- Do you know how much trouble I'll get in if my mom finds out I went down some crazy dark tunnel looking for killer robots?!

O- He's not joking. His mom is terrifying.

M- They're right. This isn't a game anymore. Texas will stay up here and keep you safe while we go get your friends.

T- What! Wait, why me?

M- Because you're the bravest warrior we've got.

T- Yeah, that's true, but come on! Don't leave me with the nerds!

D- What is this place?

O- Booyah! Mutant wolverine. I win!

Th- I could show you how to use that.

T- Save it. Not interested.

O- Why not? You're really good.

T- You really think so?

Th- Here, watch.

T- Hyah! Huh?

T- Mike, Julie! Incoming! We got trouble!

Th- Come on, I just got this!

O- Your mom is gonna be so mad.

J- This isn't working!

M- I'm open to suggestions!

R- A wizard!

Ja- Applesauce!

J- Jacob?

R- Aww!

Bot- The creator has returned!

M- Uh, Jacob? Care to fill us in?

Ja- It started back when Kane and I were partners- before there even was a Deluxe! I was designing our first ever Utility Bot. Its purpose was to make life in Detroit easier and safer. I equipped it with a new AI that would allow the bot to anticipate human commands, but I was the only one the bot seemed to listen to. But if it were ever to escape the lab, there's no telling the danger it could pose. I begged Kane to shut the program down! I always thought he did.

Bot: It began soon after you left us. Kane retrained us! We were instructed to capture enemies of the public and bring them back to Kane's new creation, an Interrogator. But the humans could not control it. Kane sealed the lab. Our new master told us every human was out to destroy us. As such, every human became our enemy. Disloyalty was severely punished. So we waited, until this door finally opened.

M- Our friends went missing this morning. Have you seen them?

Bot- Of course. We took them per our master's instructions.

J- We need to get them back!

[roar]

Bot- Our master has awoken. If he discovers you here with us, he will destroy us.

M- Get the LARPers out of here!

C- I'm not leaving you guys!

R- Our place is here, with our King!

M- This isn't a game! Get your friends to safety.

C- Let's move!

D- Come on!

J- Look out!

[rubble collapses the door]

T- Mike!

D- Julie!

Both- Jacob!

D- We'll never move this stuff by ourselves!

T- Says who?

Th- What do we do?

C- I know a way to get through there! But I will require your van.

Ja- There used to be another exit!

J- Hey, look at this!

M- The kids have to be in one of those rooms. If we can find a way past that thing we can rescue them and get the heck out of here! Think you can buy us some time?

J- Do you even have to ask? Hey, ugly! Over here!

M- Sam! Phillip! Climb up here!

S- You're the new king of the realm?

M- You bet your butt I am. Lord Smiling Dragon, at your service. Now get up that rope, squire!

T- Okay, I admit. It's pretty cool.

C- But is it possible?

D- Sure. But there's no way the three of us can build it fast enough.

C- What if they helped?

D- I know you don't mean the little lunatics that just tried to kill us!

Bot- We cannot get involved. If our master were to find out-

C- He's not your master! You are in Raymanthia. And in Raymanthia, every man- or... freaky little Utiliton- is free! Free to stand up for yourselves. Free to fight back! And free to live! Our friends are down there, and I swear to you on the steel of my blade that even if I have to slay the beast itself, we! will! bring them back!

[utilitons cheering]

T- hwah! Nah, see, this ain't nerdy. This is a level 25 battle ax, okay? Twenty five. Think about it.

Ja- Maybe there wasn't another exit?

M- Stay here!

M- Way to go, Chuck!

S&P- The Vanquisher!

T- Make way for Texas!

C- The beast is absorbing the blasts!

[mike gets got]

C- Mike!

C- Drive! and when I say stop, stop fast! ...STOP!

M- Ha, oh yeah!

M- For saving my life on the field of battle, I owe you my life. My steel is yours to command, since a king cannot carry... I forget how the rest of it goes, here! All hail King Chuck, the Vanquisher!

R- This was the coolest game ever!

M- ... the game. Your win streak. You guys have to go defend your crown!

Th- We'll never be able to muster an attack in time.

T- What if we help.

M- We're yours to command, Lord Vanquisher.

C- For the glory of the realm!

[all yell]

#motorcity #i meant to just. have this but i figured i might as well post it #chuck (motorcity) #mike chilton #julie kane #dutch gordy #texas (motorcity) #mne

[scroll-the-adventurer]

Small fox girl destroys dungeon in one punch.

So I’ve been playing a little AI dungeon in my free time. For those who don’t know, AI dungeon is a free text based adventure game that uses advanced sentence auto complete to build stories with your input. It’s not real AI, but it’s still pretty good at building interesting roleplay stories.

Anyway, I’m playing a wizard. Early on in the campaign I rescued a tiny little fox girl named Mimi, who I found wandering lost in some ruins looking for her kidnaps family. Quest accepted, and she joins my party. She’s about 4′ nothing, weights as much as a bushel of chickens, but once we get back to town to get her geared up she tells me she’s a fighter. She’ll use swords and daggers, but she prefers using her tiny little fists.

For a visual reference, I’m going to link one of @emybunart‘s characters, because I picture her to look like this, based on the description AI dungeon gave me.

So, long story short, we’ve found the evil fortress that Mimi’s parents have been taken to, we’ve even freed them already, but the fortress itself is alive with evil magic and has placed a barrier on all the exits to trap us all. Even the sorceress, Zal, who made the dungeon centuries ago has been trapped by it. She can’t leave, she can’t control it, she can’t even die because the fortress just brings her back to life and keeps her young. We find and free Zal from the trance she was kept in while the fortress feed on her magic. Realizing that Zal isn’t evil and siding with her, she explains how to defeat the living fortress. This is 100% AI generated dialog, aside from the bold which is my input to generate more dialog. All I did was say some stuff and press enter, and this is what I got: "We need to destroy this damned fortress." Zal says after hugging you both. "Yes, yes, of course." You say. "What's the plan?" Mimi asks. "I have no idea." You admit. "This gem is what's in control of the fortress. If we break it, we break the curse." Zal says, pointing to the gem floating above the table. "That shouldn't be a problem. Mimi, can just hit that gem really hard." You say to the girls. "Are you sure?" Mimi asks. "Yeah, it shouldn't do anything dangerous, but let's be safe." You say. Mimi walks up to the gem and hits it with her fist. Nothing happens. "Um... I don't think that did anything." Mimi says. "Really?" Zal asks. "Yeah, the gem didn't crack or anything." Mimi says. "Give it the hardest hit you can manage. Just really punch the hell out of it." You tell Mimi. "Are you sure?" Mimi asks again. "I'll put a powerful spell on you to keep you safe and make you stronger. It'll be fine." You tell Mimi as you begin channeling your spell. Mimi turns to face the gem once more and gives it a huge punch. She utters, "HAWASEERERASHKERAZERGARARARAGAGA!" Mimi's fist explodes with power, and this punch was way more powerful than her last attempt. The gem shatters into a million pieces. "That's what I'm talking about!" you say excitedly. The three of you stare at the gem and at each other for a moment. "I have no idea what I just did." Mimi says. I died laughing. Seriously, I’ve never ever seen AI dungeon spit out such a battle cry and the results were amazing. Later a fellow wizard who was studying the dungeon before becoming it’s prisoner asked me how I defeated the dungeon I told him “Oh, she punched it in the heart and it exploded.” pointing the the tiny fox-girl who just waved at him and his response was “That’s amazing! But also what the fuck?!” And I had to take a break from laughing so hard. Oh man. Mimi is the MVP of the campaign.

#ai dungeon #fantasy #rpg

[canadiangold]

Tell me a little bit about your characters! I'd love to learn more about them.

OK SHARK YOU GOT IT SHAKR THATNK OUU SHARK whio do you want cause i think i got 17 characters all told

LEMME START WITHT THE BASTARTDS WHO STARTED IT ALL The Myriad

gross - the boss man. major self-insert. he’s got cybernetic legs and a liking for swords and DMRs

kilo - the demo gal. big gf mood, love explosions, busty blonde witha  robo arm and eyes

omni - the whiz kid. he got so many smarts from days alone in an internet cafe with wikipedia and a thirst for KNOWING he’s great i love him. shy and cute in a plain way. loves big guns almost as much as he loves his friends

thia - the light goddess. she got exploded in atlantis and now she can create holograms from her body that she mostly uses to make swords to cut bad guys. big aristocrat energy. secretly thirsty and lonely

panzer - big stronk tank. huge scandinavian bro, huge muscles, thousand-yard stare, crew cut, soft voice, big laugh

neff - like nephilim, get it? she has wings because i like harpies. robo wings like the vulture from spiderman homecoming, young woman who never outgrew the teenage rebellious angst

torch - help her. ace pilot who crashed a protoype and got burned real bad. little Off and lonely but everybody loves ehr because she’s the one to pull their ass olutta the fire assuming she didn’t start it HA. CAUSE SHE BURNS THINGS. TORCH!

ghast - he dont exist anymore. he was boring and underdeved so i just killed him

i love them all except ghast and wanna write about them but i just never get the motivation but THAT WILL CHANGE THIS YEAR

NOW THEN LET’S TALK Tabenon. now to be fair this whole world grew outta my late-night horny imagination so it’s very........ yeah

Zazriel - a mountain of a demon-human hybrid. used to be a monk, but now wokrs as a seellsword using his magicvs to be a invincingble juggernaut. serves Murder, the poorly-defined goddess. love him but he is totlaly inconsistent characterization

Veera and Tuule - dragon twins! that can turn inot humans because plot reasons. they start as super androgenous boy and girl twinsies but Murder does some Stuff to them and now they’re super sexy paragons of their sex. only offspring of the current Matriarch of the Blue Dragons, and are questing to make children of their own to save the bloodline

annelie - dwarf babby. she has a gun in DnD-esque fantasy so nobody messes with her more than once. she has already fallen victim to one of my less mainstream kinks and it’s only gonna get worse for that poor girl

thalia - vampire! love vampires. so sexy, so mysterious. she’s feeding off tuule and slowly tunring into a dragon hybrid. she’s gonna be a beast byt the end of the adventure. imade her in the code vein character creator and i just adore how she came out

taffeta - and linen! both named after fabrics because reasons! literally the phrase “what if i took the battlemage with a familiar concept and wrapped it in kink?” brought to life. boy she’s got a storm coming, but she’s gonna be great i lover her already. very quiet, has a very traumatic background. scarred to hell, hides in her armor with linen

arnet and luna - a werewolf and his adoptive werestrix sister. they’re super cute and wholesome comapred to everyone else and i would die for them. they’re just wandering around the West Land because they’re bored

im very proud of the world of Tabenon and i hope to stay in it for a long time, even after A Typical Adventure is over.

WARFRAME OCs now the ones that i write a bunch of lil stuff about with ivarararararararaqra because we have fun together

Tinleah - she be the operator, very bored, veryu purople

SOlise - mom cephalon which is like a supercomputer AI made from a dead person squeezed into a hologram and confined to a ship this is real warframe lore

Gray - Grak’kur, a prototype grinmeer trooper who was slated for execution but tinleah saved him for no reason so now he just chills in her orbiter

the warframes i dont really count as characters in their own right just because of how they work in my mind, but Datura, Pulsar, and Amanita are named and act on their own and will make repeating appearances i love them

#drunk tag #my OCs #under the cut because i eambeled a LOT sorry #timetravelingshark

[lateviews]

Lateviews: The Forest

https://old.reddit.com/r/patientgamers/comments/92vspi/lateviews_the_forest/

The Forest is a confused game. It doesn't play to it's own strengths and this can lead to frustrations and apathy. Still, the co-op aspect of it makes it enjoyable you will have some fun playing it. Get it on sale and it probably won't be the worst money you've ever spent.

Let's start with the combat because it's the most pushed of the game mechanics. By pushed I mean that the game pushes the fighting on you, a lot. Anytime from the second day onwards, the natives of the island will make themselves known to you. Initially they are hesitant to attack and may even run away from you but eventually every encounter with the natives turns into a fight. The AI in The Forest is abysmal. The enemies don't feel real. They don't react in believable ways and they are completely unpredictable. They are so erratic that it's impossible to judge what their next move will be. There are no clever decisions to make in combat. Either you get the first blow and the hitstun from it will allow you to continue attacking until they die or the natives random AI patterns devise that they are going to launch enough lightning fast attacks that you die lest you remembered to hold up your block. Succeeding in combat isn't making decisions, it's exploiting the enemy's AI. And you need to exploit the game or you die. Nothing changes later on when you end up encountering mutated enemies. You get stuck with the same ultimatum. Take advantage of the poor pathfinding and get them stuck on a ledge, or hop on the ledge yourself and pelt them with projectiles. Even when you fail in combat, there's no danger. You respawn at the plane and you just need to walk to where your body is and pick up your stuff. It's just tedious to die. Combat is just a chore that constantly gets in the way of you trying to have fun.

Speaking of chores, the survival mechanics have the same design philosophy. Take advantage of the system or die. I get the sense that the game wants you to forage for berries and kill wildlife to survive but it's just designed so poorly. Rabbits, Deer, Lizards and Squirrels are all not worth hunting unless you need their respective pelts. The AI once again, feels broken. Most of the time if you step within a few metres of the animal it'll zoom off in the opposite direction and if the opposite direction happens to be a cliff or a body of water, they will just run around in circles, whizzing past you with so much speed they are impossible to hit with an axe. Although sometimes, you'll find a lizard just chilling by your feet, not yet aware of the fact that you're standing above it. So why bother hunting them when you can just kill turtles and birds? Turtles spawn along the beach every day and produce enough food that you'll never go hungry. They don't fight back or run away. The same mostly applies for birds who's landing animation is so slow that it takes no effort to catch them. Managing health and water is insultingly trivialised. There are 2 water sources in the game. One hurts to drink from and the other doesn't. It doesn't take long to construct the rain catcher and then you'll never be thirsty ever again. Health can be restored by eating food and sleeping but the amount restored seems to vary on factors outside your control. It is much simpler just to consume the medication that you find in abundance from discarded plane luggage around the world.

So what's the appeal of The Forest? The first is the construction. Opening your survival book for the first time is often a shock. There are pages and pages of structures you can build. Tree houses, house boats, drying racks, zip-lines. You can even build custom houses as big and as intricate as you want. There is so much to build... and all of it is pointless unless you're already abusing the game. Most structures you build on the mainland of the game will be destroyed by the natives. There is no feasible way to protect your house from the natives without devoting 100% of your attention to it. You'll find yourself endlessly repairing walls in an attempt to hold them off. And you'll never get to move onto the gameplay that is actually enjoyable. That is of course unless you build on one of the tiny islands just off the coast. Then the natives will never reach your house but at that stage you're just exploiting the system again!

The other truly enjoyable part of The Forest is the spelunking. There are a number of different cave systems and each of them contains secrets and collectibles all over the place. It's dark, it's spooky and exciting. You need to balance using your map and using your torch to find your way around and you're rewarded with better gear (such as a modern axe, a radio to replenish stamina or a sword). This aspect of the game is also ruined by the enemies. It's so dark that you require a light source to see. You know what isn't a light source? Your weapons. In co-op it's manageable because one person runs around in circles with a torch while the other engages in combat but once again, these enemies are getting in the way of you having fun.

I felt really bad about starting a peaceful run of this game once my house had been destroyed in my first game but honestly, it's the best way to play the game. You can build a magnificent house wherever you want and nobody will disrupt you. You can ignore the turtles and spend days hunting rabbits and deer because with no enemies, you will have enough success that you will be able to feed yourself. You can explore the caves fully, finding all the collectibles and treasures and there's no need to engage in the clumsy, poorly designed, frustrating and honestly dumb combat. If you can pick this game up cheap and convince a friend to join you, give it a go but do not feel bad about starting again on peaceful if you get frustrated with the enemies.

#TheForest #The Forest #Lateviews #survival games