#except i don't think that's an adequate description of my last four days. like i don't think that explains the degree of hyperfixation

[quatregats]

Having a real "*freeze frame**record scratch* oh hey it's me you might be wondering how I ended up here" kind of moment rn

#i left the house one (1) time for the entirety of wednesday through saturday #skipped two of my classes did not write the requisite discussion post for either and also didn't turn in the project abstract for one #completely disappeared off the radar for all of my social obligations #and instead went down an insane research/writing rabbit hole for The Blorbos #methinks something has to give. we cannot continue like this #and like when i say this i need you to understand that i spent perhaps 12-14 hours per day for four days #on this extremely sillygoofy writing tangent #what in hell is wrong with my brain but like actually #the most interesting part is that i feel completely fine like i mostly just needed to be let out to see sunlight and get exercise #but i feel like in the past this has caused/been a sign of major depressive episode #and i now really don't know how to explain it to anyone #like i mean it's literally 'yeah sorry i didn't come to [x] i was having a grand old time writing fanfic' #except i don't think that's an adequate description of my last four days. like i don't think that explains the degree of hyperfixation #i think i need an autism and/or adhd diagnosis but also i'm really not sure how that's going to help with anything #but idk it might (and i'm going to look into it anyway bc this can't continue as it is) #perce rambles