#dirk sits like me ive decided

[journeysintowebcomics]

Homestuck Liveblog #170

UPDATE 170: Dave Gets His Epiphany

Last time Hussie had decided it was time to pour even more dialogue onto the readers, since last time it hadn’t been enough, hah! Ten different dialogue options – presented linearly, in a subversion of how this usually goes. So let’s continue with what may or may not be the last chance these characters have of talking to each other before the fights.

So I heard that hovering over the options one already cleared would show images, and that was right! There are images. It seems Dave and Dirk continue just...lying around awkwardly, and Vriska and her ghost are arguing while Meenah fantasizes about varied stuff. There’s more than can be done, although the very next option is Roxy being alone. She’s still trying to create the matriorb. Calliope is sitting right in front of her, in silent support role. Roxy channels the universe and Alternia’s complicated state of matters, and...

Well! Mission accomplished! That was easier than I thought it’d be, even with Calliope’s silent help. I suppose there wasn’t more time for delaying this any longer. Kanaya is going to be immensely happy the troll race will be resurrected now. This was a short detour, completely devoid of words but with a significant development – at least to complete quite some part of Roxy and Kanaya’s arcs and goals in this story.

Unfortunately for everyone involved, Roxy and Calliope leave right when the bizarre combination that is Jasprosesprite arrives to hassle Jane for a while longer. I’m crossing my fingers this’ll be quick and painless.

JASPROSESPRITE^2: Miss me Rose?  JASPROSESPRITE^2: Did you know I love you?? Weird thing for me to say and you to hear, probably!  JASPROSESPRITE^2: I inherited the adoration our cat had for you, which now strangely is directed with the exact same intensity at myself, because I'm you!  JASPROSESPRITE^2: Funnily enough this manifests itself in a particularly acute form of narcissism, which is something we were already sort of afflicted by, and so was our cat by the very nature of the sort of animal he was!  JASPROSESPRITE^2: The bottom line is I'm pretty twisted up inside in all the most beautiful ways and it's wonderful.  ROSE: It really isn't.

Haha, okay, that one was actually pretty funny. She’s not wrong, Rose, you do tend to have slight traces of narcissism in your personality. Guess that all the increased narcissism in this sprite is what makes it have absolutely no brain-mouth filter, what with having an inflated sense of the self and what one says. Being a cat can’t help that either.

Now that Jasperosesprite made the customary hassling towards Rose, she gets straight to business about the battle plan. She has to arrange with Jane how it’ll be done, after all. This is achieved by taking Jane away without even giving her a moment to prepare. There’s someone she needs to meet, somebody in Jane’s planet.

Ah, true, the denizen. The New Wonderkids’ session was rather lacking in information about the denizens, especially since this session was meant to do pretty much nothing. Given Hussie’s track record so far, I’m almost completely sure that Jane’s talk with the denizen will happen off-screen and the characters will talk about it once it’s done, so...no more option than waiting until this is done!

Damn it , I have been bamboozled! Well played, Hussie, you had me fooled, I admit it. This could be good, though, not everyday you meet a senior version of yourself that’s dressed as a clown and...is the mother of your father. This is time-travel-gone-wrong levels of weird.

Aw, come on, Hussie, I wanted to see this! But nope, just when Nannasprite got in front of Jane the section ended and went to the next. Oh well. I’m really hoping I’ll have the chance to see how this goes, but I’m not going to hold my breath over it. The scribbled images of what the rest of the options are doing show John and Terezi discussing how Rose could have a black romance status with, uh, a version of herself. Yeeeeeeah no, let’s not do that. Doesn’t seem healthy – just ask Karkat, it’d be a headache.

About Roxy and Calliope, they just arrived to what I think is Jade’s planet, and Calliope is told to stay with Jade. I had completely forgotten Jade is still asleep. It’s once again said that it’s nice to have Calliope around. And...that was it! I just summarized around six or so pages in this very short paragraph.

I think that goes way beyond the realm of kismesis behavior Rose...and out of the realm of sanity as well. Stay away from any copies of the Sassacre book, resist the temptation. Anyways, Dave and Dirk are still here. Going to try to talk again? They’re focusing more on the battle to come than on anything else. Hah! No progress on the heartfelt conversation front, apparently.

DAVE: hes got lord english powers tho

It could be a way to know how well a fight against Lord English would go, then. Sure, Union Jack is completely different, less bulky, has no time powers, and presumably has one single personality in that noggin of his instead of being a weird amalgamation, but it’d be a way to see if they are ready to fight against Lord English. Think of it as having training wheels on your bike.

Swords can’t help you solve problems with people, who’d have thought. Dirk and Jake are the closest example to how someone who has spent their formative years alone and without the presence of people around would behave: with no social skills at all. Jade got very lucky in that regard, she is very well-balanced for someone who grew on an island and only had a dog for company. Then again, her Dreamself must have been of help, the Prospitians must have helped her have some people skills.

DIRK: ...  DAVE: ...

Nothing has changed here.

It takes a few pages more before Dirk takes the plunge headfirst down the emotional cliff, with all the grace of a novice. It does get the conversation going, mostly about how this isn’t how he pictured the meeting going.

DIRK: Maybe you'll think it's weird that I idolized some version of you that I never knew. 

These two are much more similar than they each realize. Their upbringings aren’t that different, heck, I’d say that Lil’ Hal fulfilled the role Bro had, just with less sword attacks. Other than that it was pretty much the same, an isolated life with an aloof person/glasses in the vicinity. Come on, Dave, admit you idolized Bro. That’d be a great step towards turning the page in your life and bonding with Dirk, you can do it!

DAVE: ive got to say  DAVE: meeting you  DAVE: its not rockin my world here  DAVE: or upending any paradigms or whatever  DAVE: listening to you and looking at you  DAVE: it really really just  DAVE: reminds me of him

Close enough! I’m a bit downtrodden there was no exchange of words between Bro and Dave so I could have a reference on how similar this actual situation is to how they got along. I imagine Bro wasn’t that different from Dirk.

DIRK: Things, between you and me, from your perspective, um,  DIRK: Are we like, not cool?  DAVE: ..................

I’m not sure if it’s telling or not that there was no ‘yeah’ or similar quick response.

DAVE: i didnt fuckin like you that much ok? 

...

...

...okay, that isn’t how I thought it’d go. I suppose there’s a difference between idolizing and actually liking a person. Good for you for saying it aloud, Dave. It must have been very difficult to say to anybody, even more to a version of your brother.

After a sequence of images meant to show how little time passed between Dave going “I don’t want to talk about it” to “okay heres what im saying” he finally starts...and boy is it tough.

DAVE: i dunno why my friends got to have adults around who cared about them  DAVE: they complained bitterly about stuff so i guess i convinced myself they were all in the same boat as me  DAVE: but thats not how it was 

That’s pretty much how kids and teenagers are, they complain and don’t realize sometimes such complaints aren’t about things as bad as they could be. Leaving behind such behavior is part of growing up. Dave didn’t realize how badly he was being treated, though, he just saw no difference between his life and the lives of the rest of his friends – at first.

DAVE: so all thats left to do is look back and try to put the pieces together of my first 13 years  DAVE: and all i can think is what the fuck WAS that?!  DAVE: i dont come away with the impression i used to try convincing myself of, that he was like "mysterious" or "stern" or "aloof"  DAVE: the only feeling left is this insane impression that i was raised by somebody who fuckin HATED me 

...hated you? Hm...honestly? I don’t know. Bro’s way of raising Dave had a lot of things wrong, and I really don’t know how to interpret it. I’m interested on knowing how other people interpreted it. Would you mind telling me your thoughts, everyone? I really don’t know what to think about this.

Dirk actually sounds horrified about what he’s hearing. Perhaps he doesn’t like the thought of his equivalent doing this all?

DAVE: it took years to deconstruct it all and put it back together to understand how fuckin mad i should be  DAVE: and in particular how stone cold deeply uncared for i was my whole life  DAVE: like... being merely "monitored" by a violent robot 

Haha...you know what this brought to mind? What went through my head right when I read this part?

TT: Don't worry, that's normal.  TT: Upon activation he goes into Stalking Mode.  GT: Stalking mode??  TT: Yes. He will stalk you in the jungle and strike when your guard is down. 

It’s exactly that. Dave pretty much described the robot Dirk made and sent to Jake. It’s pretty much the same in terms of how Dave was raised! Wow, Hussie, did you do this on purpose? I think you did this on purpose! Dave may as well have been raised by the brobot thing, and just like Jake – who dreaded encountering it and once he had to fight it didn’t precisely have loads of fun – Dave now doesn’t want to fight. He wants to avoid this fighting thing, and hates that he has to be the one to grab the sword and slay the villain.

You seriously screwed up here, Bro.

Dave even brings up that maybe things would have been better if Lil’ Cal hadn’t been around. Maybe! The influence of Lord English can’t be an ingredient in a healthy household – even more since part of Lord English is once another version of Dirk. Hah! Life sucks for the Striders. It’s...it’s rather depressing, actually. I wonder if at the time they had to cram Caliborn into the puppet Dave realized what Lil’ Cal was. Even if he did, I doubt he’d have any kind of reaction when anyone was nearby, but at that moment I imagine many things clicked in Dave’s head.

Would Bro have been any different if that puppet of the damned hadn’t been around? Uh...I dunno. Maybe it really was a poisonous influence of some sort, influence Dirk was lucky not to have. It’s all up to interpretation, I’d say.

I think now that the epiphany is complete I can stop the update and continue next time. This, though, this is exactly what I was hoping the Striders would do, that at least one of them would unload this heavy emotional baggage, and it’s for the better! I’m glad it’s actually happening.

Next update: three updates

#homestuck #homestuck liveblog #webcomics #liveblog #webcomic liveblog

[caepaecaesurae]

> CC: Thank Meenah

Yesterday at 5:07 PM

caepaecaesurae WVe'vwe split, and the safe-house wvon't be needed anymore, on my end at least.  I'vwe left a small thank you present on the kitchen counter. I'd be in your debt if you could wvipe the coordinates used off of the pad's history list, if and wvhen convwenient. Thank you again, and havwe a nice night.

Yesterday at 9:38 PM

brackishbarracuda yeah i can do that isle head over in an hour oar so brackishbarracuda s good to sea u caepaecaesurae Good to see you too.  I appreciate the neutrality and the assistance. Havwing somewvhere empty to go helped more than once.

Today at 12:13 AM

brackishbarracuda ive been fused before an efin when its ppl u give a shit aboat its hard so i mean some place where u didnt have any extra ppl shoutin at u seemed pike a good idea to me caepaecaesurae It wvas. Did you separate from wvhomevwer it wvas peaceably?  Or vwia incompatibility? brackishbarracuda peaceably for both thankfully one was def a hell of a lot rockier than the other one tho aight the best puns are the ones u didnt mean to make i cannaut believe caepaecaesurae I do enjoy those ones. brackishbarracuda did u ever get hit w the gem thing caepaecaesurae As I am lost, it seems I did not. brackishbarracuda lemme find u a picture for full effect aight bc shit is stupid and mine was pike stupid times two brackishbarracuda http://imgur.com/sPQFO8t there we go rly tho how tf puts that shit on ur foot caepaecaesurae WVhat is that? brackishbarracuda aight so theres the weird sentient rock aliens who p much project around w/e rock they are an they do the fuse thing on purpose pike thats a thing they can do and a bunch a ppl got hit w it a while back usually shits pike on ur hand or ur forhead oar ur arm or somefin but no brackishbarracuda nah it was on my cod damn foot caepaecaesurae First I'vwe heard about them. ... You havwe my sympathies. WVhy the foot? brackishbarracuda idk i do naut fuckin no thats just where it was when i got got caepaecaesurae I imagine you sawv the tittastrophe wve had? brackishbarracuda yeah brackishbarracuda yeah that shore was somefin i saw w my own two eyes brackishbarracuda howd that whole thing go efin caepaecaesurae It looked rather like wve wvere split dowvn the middle vwertically in a lot of respects. The side wvith no breast had short hair like mine. WVe made a falsie so clothes wvould fit. brackishbarracuda now sea i woulda just said fuck it and done the whole half clothes shit pike jacket on one and dress on the other deal caepaecaesurae tsk.  I should'vwe talked to you more, that'd be a hell of a look. brackishbarracuda i mean u aint gotta b fused to pull it off right caepaecaesurae True.  It wvould complete the look though. caepaecaesurae I may try a half-and-half garment of some sort soon. brackishbarracuda plz take pictures i need this shit caepaecaesurae I do lovwe my selfie tag. brackishbarracuda s cause its good shit caepaecaesurae Howv do you feel about breasted, marginally nsfwv pictures of me? brackishbarracuda im down caepaecaesurae http://caepaecaesurae.tumblr.com/post/130431613390/speaking-of-anons-d brackishbarracuda v nice dam tho where tf did u get half those scars brackishbarracuda impressive caepaecaesurae I don't normally showv much skin. The large round ones on the legs are from an air battle invwolvwing laser cannons, during the game. brackishbarracuda uh first off fuckin ow caepaecaesurae Pff. Yes, but wve wvon. brackishbarracuda secondly i get it if u aint comfy w it oar w/e but u ought show more a it imo and that right theres why caepaecaesurae A good half of the scars you see there are from my first century on Alternia. ...at the end of wvhich, I began wvearing neck to wvrist to ankle bodyarmor, of the sort contained in that package.  Havwe you stopped by that hivwe yet, by the by? brackishbarracuda shit yeah i did i thought id said thank u btw caepaecaesurae You may havwe, I'm scattered lately. brackishbarracuda pike seariously i aint been in a searious scrape in a while but pike dam i cant get away from nofin w/o bleedin it feels like caepaecaesurae Armor that no one knowvs you're wvearing can be a wvonderful game changer. It turns a knife in the ribs into an invwitation to play. brackishbarracuda as much as i like it and the apron tbh shit is nice brackishbarracuda u probably made clams night more than mine w the armor caepaecaesurae I hope it servwes wvell, or entertains.  Or that the flavwor vwials do. brackishbarracuda hes the one whos gotta stitch me up half the tide caepaecaesurae A good role for a quadrant. If you elect to wvear the vwest, at least he'll only be stitching up limbs. brackishbarracuda lmao yeah fair also i should punch u in the nose for the fuckin shit u sent me pike it was so good that it legit made me mad how tf caepaecaesurae ... Hope player.  "Beyond belief" is my playground. brackishbarracuda throws my dam hands caepaecaesurae I can make things that I can imagine.  Cae*fora* made things that *She* could imagine. brackishbarracuda shit is fucked up caepaecaesurae A bit.  ... I usually try to make things that are slightly less... Intense... than that... I hope it wvasn't too much? brackishbarracuda isle survive but my tongue aint gonna b  happy w anyfin ever again this is me jokin mostly i aint upset at u oar anyfin caepaecaesurae ..Still, pardon. brackishbarracuda s aight cae ur good brackishbarracuda seariously tho why aint u show off ur scars more 38? caepaecaesurae Enough of them havwe unfortunate sources for it to be uncomfortable wvhen specific ones are indicated and remarked on, much of the time. caepaecaesurae ... Mostly, I don't like taking my armor off, evwer. I'vwe been getting better at removwing it long enough for selfies though. brackishbarracuda well dam the one u just showed me took some fuckin guts then didnt it caepaecaesurae Heh.  It wvas taken during a period of amnesia wvhere I didn't remember wvhere most of them wvere from. brackishbarracuda do u think u could do it again caepaecaesurae Possibly, though I think my selfie tag could use more less sexual things. brackishbarracuda u oughta take a pic w arlequin oar somefin then how tall efin are u btw pike are u taller than he is oar shorter or caepaecaesurae I'm a good foot and a half shorter than him, last I checked. brackishbarracuda well that makes me feel beta at least caepaecaesurae My adult height in sevweral centuries ought to be near wvhere he is nowv. brackishbarracuda yall are entirely too fuckin tall u kno that caepaecaesurae So I hear. If it makes you feel any better, all the humans top out somewvhere in the six or sevwen range I think.  They all look somewvhere betwveen fivwe and six nowv. The carapacians are a foot or twvo belowv that. brackishbarracuda pike im saury i realize u probably hear that alot but i am half a arlequins now hight an he was talkin pike sixteen feet an im overe here pike dude ur gonna b over three times my size how tf is that gonna efin work caepaecaesurae Carefully and wvith gusto. brackishbarracuda aight tru tho caepaecaesurae Havwe you evwer done the thing wvhere you rest hip to hip wvith a partner and pretend theirs is yours and marvwel at the difference? Some trolls enjoy that. I think that one wvill only improvwe as he ages, for you. caepaecaesurae "Look wvhat I'm packing nowv" brackishbarracuda i havent and now im kinda wonderin wtf ive been doin w my life caepaecaesurae You're wvelcome. .. Then again I'vwe used googly eyes in the bedroom before, so maybe my advwice isn't the best. brackishbarracuda bouy nah fuck that im gonna get a pack and use em on dirk that shit is perf caepaecaesurae My partner grewv annoyed and ripped them off, wvhich is honestly all I could hope for. brackishbarracuda tbh hell probably laugh till he cries which i count as a win brackishbarracuda but yeah tbh rippin em off sounds pike a good idea brackishbarracuda u kno me an u oughtta hang out sometide caepaecaesurae WVe should, I imagine wve'd get into heaps of trouble if any wvas avwailable. brackishbarracuda trouble is kinda my thing yeah brackishbarracuda i eel pike youd enjoy some trouble caepaecaesurae Once upon a time, maybe.  It's been a wvhile, and I might be a bit more boring nowv. Nice things, good stories, and good laughs?  Those are dear to heart. brackishbarracuda now sea mr suns out guns out tenta tattoo false boob ampora w the hella scars i aint believe you wouldnt enjoy a little trouble caepaecaesurae I'vwe had a vwery interesting life. I'm relearning howv to enjoy trouble. brackishbarracuda isle sea if i cant think of some baby trouble steps caepaecaesurae Sounds like a treat to me. caepaecaesurae Let me knowv sometime, alright? brackishbarracuda yeah def at the v least ur fun to talk to and anybody i can b a bad influence on is aight by me u feel caepaecaesurae Aye, I hear you It'd be nice to lean back in that direction somenight.  I'vwe been sitting around drinking tea a wvhile. brackishbarracuda s easy to get restless i aint efin alternian and sometides i just need to move and tear into somefin before that somefin becomes me caepaecaesurae Aye. ...I sail a ship around sometimes.  Transport pads to get back to hivwe often. Plenty of wvild lands out there to explore. brackishbarracuda theres plenty a world here to sea if u ever decide u wanna we aint managed a drone yet be in a week oar so probably caepaecaesurae The mile-high deer?  Aye I'vwe a curiosity. I'm relievwed that you're considering the drone. brackishbarracuda im uh considerin more than the drone tbh caepaecaesurae Aye? brackishbarracuda been thinkin a puttin my crown on and meanin it caepaecaesurae Lacking in context, I'm imagining you calling yourself queen of a single hivwe surrounded by largish deer. brackishbarracuda i mean in all technicality i earned the fuckin thing i blew up my planet i killed the empress so by right etc etc blah blah blah i just been runnin from it since brackishbarracuda no u aint wrong i gotta start somwhere fuckin ridiculous as it is if they aint anybody else on the planet isle take it theres a small frozen planet my ex red left me so thats two off the bat ig caepaecaesurae If there's no one else it seems a bit... abrupt. Then again, givwen a single wvorking mothergrub, one is nevwer far from an empire. I suspect Arlequin wvould havwe mixed feelings. brackishbarracuda ive convinced my spade to let me sit w em and do some political diplomatic shit and i aint lookin to be a bloody conquerer im just lookin to stop runnin from what i was hatched for mayb do some decent shit w whatever authority i got somefin betta than home was anyway caepaecaesurae I wvish you luck wvith it if you do. brackishbarracuda thanks 38/ caepaecaesurae It's hard to get in trouble wvhen you're in charge. brackishbarracuda why u gotta do me like this caepaecaesurae WVell... Ask Tyfora howv much fun her powver is. brackishbarracuda id rather naut caepaecaesurae Ask Arlequin howv much he wvants to strivwe for a newv flag -- at least, this early. brackishbarracuda i oughta talk to him aboat it tho yeah caepaecaesurae Powver is complicated.  That's all. caepaecaesurae More so than you might be preparing yourself for. brackishbarracuda i aint trynna rush into anyfin aight an isle talk to arlequin i kno shit aint easy it aint somefin im thinkin aboat lightly caepaecaesurae Then I wvish you luck.  I'm cautious about swvearing loyalties lightly, but you'll likely havwe me on call if emergencies strike. brackishbarracuda i dont take that lightly either cae thank u i afishiate it caepaecaesurae WVe'll see wvhat comes.  I'm afraid it's late though.  Another night? brackishbarracuda a course thanks for talkin at me caepaecaesurae Looking forwvard to it.  Rest wvell wvhen you go. brackishbarracuda yeah sleep good

#ooc eyes only #brackishbarracuda #contains link to a pic of cae in his underwear #because why wouldnt it

[transient-tutor]

DEREK: -is jake hanging out in the infirmary right now? because the dad-in-law is stopping by. it's not unusual, he's been coming and going the past few days to see dirk but tonight he's here for jake. he knocks on the door to get his attention before just letting himself in.- Yo Jake.

JAKE: -MOST DEFINITELY HANGING OUT IN THE INFIRMARY. Jake is taking an uneasy doze in one of the visitor cots a small distance aways from the comatose patient room. Jake didn't want to be a cumbersome presence to any medical staff that might come in and check on Dirk's vitals from time to time. Plus, just sitting in there was making him incredibly sad.- 

JAKE: -At the sound of Derek's voice, Jake lifts his head up to squint. Feeling for his glasses and starting to roll to sit. Abeit with difficulty. The weariness wouldn't shake off his bones.- Derek? 

JAKE: Youre here? -blinks and sets gaze on his father-in-law, worried all over again.- Something the matter? Is it dirk?

DEREK: -ambles over, shaking his head and waving a bandaged hand in dismissal.- Dont worry. Nothins up. 

DEREK: -plops to take a seat beside him on the cot.- I stopped by to see you.

JAKE: -shoulders sag in relief and he sighs. The biggest dog sigh of them all. Eyeballs the bandaged hand.- Get into a scrum?

DEREK: -holds up his hand and sighs at it.- Yeah with a wall. 

DEREK: It was a lil one sided.

JAKE: Oh well... 

JAKE: Happens to the best of us. -And it does! Though Jake typically fought anything but a wall.- 

JAKE: Youre here at least... having it checked and what not. 

JAKE: Sos the responsibility. -rubs at his neck, making a bit of a face.- Bluh... 

JAKE: Sorry derek. Im... 

JAKE: A few gumptions short of a decent conversation. :(

DEREK: -claps a hand onto jake's shoulder and gives him a sympathetic pat.- No worries. Didnt really come here to conversate anyhow. 

DEREK: Sorry to interrupt your beauty sleep but I wanted to get you outta here for a lil while.

JAKE: Oh uh... -It dawns on him that he's hardly spent any "family" time with Derek. As most affairs they cross paths in were in the company of other people. Also before that, Jake got entirely distracted by dating his son.- At this time of night? 

JAKE: Where would we go? -He asks this question but he lives the married family life, Derek. Understand him.-

DEREK: -he gets it. he's been there. but he also adamantly refuses to grow up in many regards, so the world remains his oyster.- Anywhere. 

DEREK: Life aint come to a screeching halt outside. If anything its bustling more than it has in who knows how long. 

DEREK: Figured we could hop in that jeep of yours and see whats goin down out there. You up to it?

JAKE: Well its not but... -looks onward, probably in the direction Dirk's room is. Whines internally. Whines eternally.-

DEREK: -sighs through his nose. yeah, he gets that too.- Just to take our minds off things for a lil while. 

DEREK: Itll be fun. Come on. -he's not above peer pressuring you, jake.-

JAKE: -It's easier to fold when Jake imagines that Derek is telling him to go, rather than suggesting they do.- Oh... 

JAKE: Alright.. 

JAKE: But lets not be long. -pries himself off the bed, again. Reluctantly.-

DEREK: -claps him on the back before hopping to his feet again.- Thats the spirit. 

DEREK: -takes the liberty of leading the way out the door. he doesn't really seem to be waiting around for him to catch up.-

JAKE: -Well that's fine... Jake knows where the Jeep is parked and is also the only one present with a key for it. He takes his time texting his friends in the infirmary about where he's heading off to. He meets up with Derek in the cargo bay.- Ill be frank... 

JAKE: I havent thought to set foot outside since... 

JAKE: My imprisonment i suppose.

DEREK: Thats reasonable. 

DEREK: Cant say Ive had much need to. -leans on the jeep nonchalantly. he wants to drive it... but he will have to ask for the keys. use your words, derek.- But I hear its safer out there. People just rebuildin their lives. 

DEREK: And thats cool. -holds out his hand.- Anyway gimme your keys to this thing. -he did it.-

JAKE: -There's a whole second Jake is reluctant to... before he passes them to Derek.- 

JAKE: ... 

JAKE: This was our wedding gift. -blurts. He can't help it. The associations are still there.- :(

DEREK: -snatches them up, then turns towards the vehicle.- ... Yeah. -HE BETTER NOT CRASH IT THEN. he's been known to do this with cars that don't belong to him.- 

DEREK: -gets into the driver's side.- Its a good one. John got it for you right?

JAKE: -climbs in and sits in the passenger side. The sad faces intensify.- Yes. :C

DEREK: -damn, this is gonna be harder than he thought. probably not gonna be the wild night he was hoping for, but he can improvise.- 

DEREK: -produces a six pack of booze from his sylladex and holds them out to him.- Have one. -yes, he's telling him to do this again.-

JAKE: Wh... 

JAKE: -suddenly taking booze in his lap.- Were not driving under any influences are we?

DEREK: -jesus CHRIST.- Im not gonna. -for now-

JAKE: I think id have to stop you if we were sir! Family statuses aside. -HUFFS.-

DEREK: -smirks a little at him as he starts up the jeep.- Good to know. 

DEREK: But I insist. You have at it. 

DEREK: -and with that he TAKES OFF. the ship is landed somewhere out in the wilderness, but not too far from the minneapolis area still. plenty of municipalities to check out, but instead derek is taking a scenic route.-

JAKE: -dont mind if he rolls down the window. He likes the feel of the wind in his hair and especially his mustache.- Well... 

JAKE: I watch plenty of television and im sure theres a law some place that reads there cant be open beverages in a moving vehicle! 

JAKE: So im sure wherever were going it can wait. -sets the boozes down at his feet. That's that.-

DEREK: Oh come on its basically lawless out here. 

 DEREK: Man youre a real goodie two shoes. -says so with a good natured snicker. he's just trying to loosen him up... what a shame it's failing. maybe it's not in the cards. he pauses, hesitant to say what he's thinking but he's derek so he'll say it anyhow.- 

DEREK: You must keep Dirk in line then huh?

JAKE: Shucks i wouldnt go that far. -feeling his face flushing in color. Absently, Jake fiddles with the ring on his finger.- Its just... 

JAKE: Second nature i suppose? Thinking and... 

JAKE: Doing my darndest to plan ahead. -he trails off. Feeling sad all over again.- But you dont want to hear this. We um. 

JAKE: Ought to focus ahead and all. Coming all this way.

DEREK: -glances at him- Well the plan was to take it easy. Sure. 

DEREK: But now I feel like talking about him too. 

DEREK: Its nice hearin this stuff. -sobers up rather suddenly.- 

DEREK: You know were not as close as Id like to be. Me and him. 

DEREK: Guess I can kinda live vicariously through all yall that are when you talk about that sorta thing. What all is goin on in your day to day. Shit like that.

JAKE: Why not? 

JAKE: The lack of closeness i mean.

DEREK: Well... -drums fingers on the steering wheel.- He dont like me too much. 

DEREK: Guess weve been working on that but its slow going. 

DEREK: I cant blame him anyways.

JAKE: Right... -If it helped Derek any, Jake had no reason to have hard feelings about him.- I cant imagine why. My impressions always been that youre as swell a fella as it gets! 

JAKE: Whats there more to say about it? -But no really, he's curious.-

DEREK: -goes quiet for a moment but it's fine, he just scoffs.- People tell me there aint nothin left to say anymore. 

DEREK: But I wasnt always a swell fella.

JAKE: Oh... -Truth be told, he had a hard time picturing anyone as totally a bad person. Jake glances at him, a glimmer of optimism for his father-in-law.- Its a dog eat dog world im told... 

JAKE: Some folks do whats best they think is needed for survival. -looks away then, watching the passing scenery. So dark out...- I know its true for me.

DEREK: That dont always make it right. 

DEREK: But that aint somethin you gotta worry about. Youre an indisputably good guy. 

DEREK: -decides to make a turn down some dirt road.- And a great dad.

JAKE: Good... golly. Gulp.  -if it's Derek's intention to make Jake blush again, it's working. Too much positivity in one sitting, his eyes are starting to water. Jake scrubs his face with the back of one hand. There they go, down some dirt road.-

DEREK: -IT ISNT EXACTLY, but he is making extra effort to be sincere with jake.- ... -glances at him.- 

DEREK: Its true. 

DEREK: Times like these really make or break a man. 

DEREK: ... And Ill be real with you it is shit like this which made me a bad guy. I let that happen. 

DEREK: Cuz I thought I had to do it alone. 

DEREK: -drums fingers on the steering wheel.- Just remember youre not alone alright?

JAKE: I know it. Its not... 

JAKE: Me im torn all over for. -swallows hard as it turns out his attempt to curb the water works failed. Jake sits there with tears dripping.-

DEREK: -frowns at the road ahead of him. he's not the best at expressing his sympathy, not always, but it's a little easier when some of that pain is shared. he reaches over to grip at jake's shoulder for a moment.- Yeah. I get it.

JAKE: -the simple gesture of squeezing his shoulder has Jake's heart wrenching even more. The most he can do is wring out a handkerchief to blow his nose into. Jake English doesn't go anywhere without it.-

DEREK: -this poor kid... he can't believe he carries around a handkerchief though. he clears his throat to suppress a chuckle about it and retracts his hand to place both back on the wheel.- 

DEREK: I dont wanna make promises that itll be alright but... Youve got me and Riley and Dave and the whole goddamn clan to make shit easier where we can.

JAKE: -sniffles again and focuses on folding the hankerchief away. He'll have to wash this later.- Oh i know i... 

JAKE: ... 

JAKE: I feel just awful... thinking to ask when i cant even be fucking bothered to hold my own. -seems to be telling himself this more than Derek.- Ive held worse. Ive... endured worse. 

JAKE: And so has everyone else. Its... -rests his elbow just outside the window, looking out again.- Magnanimously stupid of me. I shouldnt ask more of everyone.

DEREK: -brows knit as a familiar kind of pain wrenches at his insides. how does he even begin to explain how well he understands?- 

DEREK: I know. 

DEREK: When you wanna keep it together so nobody else has gotta add you to their long list of troubles. 

DEREK: Even when you feel like youre fallin apart. 

DEREK: Its frustratin. 

DEREK: Like fuck. You should be able to handle this. 

DEREK: You got to. -grips the steering wheel tight, but when he notices they've arrived at their impromptu destination, he loosens his hold and slows the vehicle to a stop next to one of the many lakes around here.- 

DEREK: -turns to look at jake.- Youre a strong person Jake. 

DEREK: I know you got this. 

DEREK: But I aint offerin my help cuz I think you need it. 

DEREK: Im doin it cuz youre family.

#gunhardyTemerity #in which derek steals jake for hang outs #this is old back when dirk was first in his coma

[gulescamisade]

Minnesota:  Day 7

[At some point during the night, or day -- it'd be indistinguishable to jake -- a voice speaks to him over an intercom.] ????: hey jami 2.0 u think u can do that pumpkin trick again?

JAKE: -snoring in a bed made of pumpkin patch on the ground. As an unfamiliar voice echoes overhead, he snorts awake. Jolting upwards with leaves in his hair. Also accidentally summoning 3 more pumpkins as he had fallen asleep practicing and all.-

JAKE: Hoosit?? -blink blink. He's AWAKE.-

????: eelmao

????: conchgrats buoy u did it

????: cept i kno u aint even got a grip on whatebber the fuck u doin

????: but i dont need u to

JAKE: -sitting there mouthing the words like eel-aye-em-oh and squinting. He feels... inexplicably chilled to the bone.-

JAKE: (Doh... now i have a bad feeling about this.)

JAKE: I dont suppose... this is all to do with a ploy to get some unmentionable dirty work dished out and done with? But why speak to me now?? Are you to level with me in some sense of the word???

JAKE: Why drag it out like this??? If you could do anything. Why not make me a mindless drone like dear sweet jade and jane?????

)(IC: cuz i dont wanna fuck w u small fry

)(IC: the gills are smart

)(IC: they aint barely need no direction

)(IC: give em a goal and they on cuz they know what the fuck is up

)(IC: u tho? alwaves wadin thru ur lil guppy emoceans

)(IC: makin some dumb ass pumpkins grow

)(IC: the fuck even is that

)(IC: do u even know what yoar capable of sonfish

JAKE: -takes the deepest breath of his life, his heart thudding like an iron clad weight. He can't see her face, he only knows her voice is there. Green eyes wide and fearful as he slowly rises to stand.- Im...

JAKE: I know somehow. Some way.

JAKE: Maybe it wont happen today or tomorrow. But my capabilities say that you are going to pay one pretty penny for the horrible things youve done.

JAKE: Mark my words. Its not me who should be afraid when at the end of all of this... -His face is now screwing up, visualizing everyone this war has ruined. Their wishes, hopes, dreams. The energy seems to charge in his veins, making the air around him hot enough that the pumpkin vines at his feet begin to shrivel.- At the end of all of this....

JAKE: Youre just going to be a scary story people tell their kiddos at night!!!!! A LAUGHING STOCK. HAH. Worse than me and ive never had a dignified moment in my fucking life!!!! And not a SOUL is going to be sorry youre GONE.

JAKE: SO FUCK WHAT YOU MIGHT HAVE IN STORE FOR ME YOU FISH FRIED CURISH VARLOT!!!! FUCK IT THIS WAY AND TO HIGH HELL WHEN ITS WHAT I HAVE IN STORE FOR YOU THATLL BE WHATS FUCKING WHAT.

JAKE: Ill do it for jade! And jane and grandma and--- EVERYONE. Everyone youve fucking ruined with your vile reign of TYRANNY!!!!!! -This FIELD around Jake cannot be contained in this box of a room. Hell. The metal walls are beginning to bend with just these few seconds of intensity. Somebody do somethin'.-

)(IC: -LOW WHISTLE into her mic. she doesn't sound perturbed by his threats, or even by the damage he's doing. there's always more rooms she can put him in... maybe even make his lil friend roxy make him a nice box to hide in. she's definitely got more focus then this one...-

)(IC: im all aboat that reel glowy shit u got goin there

)(IC: but i know i can werk it betta

)(IC: anywave im board and i got shit to do

)(IC: goodnight BITC)(

[SNOP. Unfortunately for Jake, repressing magical/emotional outbursts is easy when she has the concentrated abilities of a cerulean at her disposal. But fortunately for him, she can only really put him to sleep, being a human and all... Also fortunately for him, she has the attention span of a gold fish and intends to let him dangle a little bit longer before experimenting on him as she intends to... Or maybe she's just having fun with him. Who knows.]

JAKE: -A lot of fortunates and a lot of unfortunates. It's always the seed of belief that matters.-

JAKE: -Passes clean out in the center of his cell, totally ready to write this off as some kind of fever dream... if it's not for the melty edges of the walls around him. This was exciting as it was frustrating.-

---

[Today when Jake wakes up, he will find himself redressed in tiny red shorts, red suspenders, and a big red bow tie. ur whalecum jami 2.0 ]

JAKE: -stirs awake before promptly looking down at himself.- ................................... SON OF A BITCH.

ROXY: =She couldn't help but to notice that Jake had gone missing. Which is unsettling for many reasons so she's taking a leap and exploring more even without the invisibility cloak from the void. Roxy blips out of her room, landing in the hallway and silently makes her way down it. Time to snoop!=

[It's quiet in these holding chambers with Jake and the Cherubs gone, leaving on Roxy and James who is presumably still keeping silent. At the end of the hall there is a door, and she'll find it isn't locked.](edited)

ROXY: =WHERES CALLI YOU MONSTERS?? SHE'LL FIND YA CALLI. She opens the door slowly and peeps in... if the coast is clear here comes a stinky, sweaty escaped prisoner. Where's your information?=

[The door opens up to an open room, on either side there are windows show casing labratories of some kind. It isn't entirely clear what kind of work is being done in them from where Roxy is standing. At the end of the room there's another door, but shee can also see more doors inside the labs.]

ROXY: =Hm.... can she see computers in there? She decides to get close to one window and peer in. Nerds might be at work in there...=

[There's definitely computers and lots of mechanical equipment and various tech projects half completed on the tables. The lights are low right now so there doesn't seem to be anybody working at this time.]

ROXY: =SCORE. She doesn't want to waste all her gas there has to be a way to get in there..... maybe this door at the end of the room will get her where she's going. Quietly scampers=

[This door is also open, CONVENIENTLY. It leads to another hall, and to either side of where Roxy stands are, presumably, the doors to the labs.]

ROXY: =BITCHIN, HERE COMES HER. Lab number one she's gonna prob ya! KICKS DOWN THE DOOR..... quietly. With her hand=

[As she enters, the lights TURN ON!! And that's about the extend of what happens there. She'll see all the computers have aquarium screen savers but all the fish are glittery and/or have blingee'd accessories like gold chains and shutter shades.]

ROXY: 😒

ROXY: =This is a lab so she sprays disinfectant on the computer before goin to HACK=

[It just so happens that whoever used this computer last forgot to log out of their account... They have photoshop open and there are photos of Jake. He's in red booty shorts and suspenders and he's lookin' like D8< but whoever was doing this photoshop job is trying to make him look a little happier... Like he's cheering instead of like he's about to punch the photographer in the face.]

ROXY: =Oh well shit..... oh. Well.. she. Snrk. Sorry but also ok. Where was this taken? Does it say anything about that? WHERE'S JAKE YOU COMPUTER=

[Without much looking she will first find a folder full of unedited photos of Jake from his new cell. Dank and dreary, much worse then the cells they were in before. Only a bed and a medical tray table. Another folder with the edited photos reveals these are being used for magazine covers and spreads. It seems Jake is being used as Crocker Corps POSTER BOY. Look at this well fed and obedient (?) human.]

ROXY: =OH HOW DARE!? Are there any OTHER people here computer? Like Dirk or Mom or ANYONE ELSE? WHO ALL AM HERE?=

[The computer thinks Roxy expects too much from it. At least from this account on the server. It's only been used by a humble tech intern who edits pictures in photoshop. His name is Maxwell.]

ROXY: =What a fuckin nerd Maxwell is can she HACK to find out... or would that take too much time.... it probably would so she legs it to the other lab=

[The other lab has lots of cabinets and coolers containing samples of various things... Some of which she might recognize as GLOWING MUSHROOMS and ARTIFICIAL SWEETENER. The kind of research they do in here might be a little more obvious...]

ROXY: =Finally putting Sweet-n-low out of business she sees, good. But she's scrunching up her nose and looking for anything useful or recent? =

[Or perhaps they were behind the Sweet-n-Low game all along! In any case, if she dares to try confiscate some of the mushrooms or any of the extracts lying around, she might be able to try using it for its hypnotic properties. Otherwise, there's mostly just experiments with food and chemicals being done in this lab. Sadly no clues of friends.]

ROXY: =God dammit. Well shucks she blows this popsicle stand and goes on a hunt for Jakey boy or Calliope!=

[Back in the hall, on the other side there's yet another door but it's more heavily sealed then the others with some kind of keycard lock, but with little indication of what's on the other side. At the very end of the hall is an elevator, also requiring keycard access to use.]

ROXY: =this might be where its unavoidable. UNA-VOID-ABLE. She bets this heavily sealed door is something GOOD. She's going to take a quick peek in there if she can poof in!=

[There's a growling around these hallways... sounds like something or someone might be prowling around.]

[The room Roxy has poofed into seems to be some kind of observation room. There's a couple screens on one wall with a panel beneath -- one screen is showing the room Jake is being held in (where he's either sleeping among his pumpkin patch or being rowdy...) while the other screen is shut off.]

ROXY: =zoinks! Growls are bad news. She hurries and tries to see if she can turn on the other screen or find where exactly the room holding Jake is? GO GO GADGET STUBBY FINGERS=

[MAIN SCREEN TURN ON. She manages to get the other screen running, but it's only showing an empty room with a bed... With unsettling stains of red and green on the sheets.]

ROXY: ..... =Bruh tf?? She squints and that can only mean bad news. Does it say where these cameras ARE? She should make her way downtown and quickly!=

JADE: -zaps into the room- BARK!!!

ROXY: !!! =JUMPS= FUCKIN'--- oop.....

ROXY: ..................

ROXY: ..................

ROXY: ...........

ROXY: this isnt the bathroom wtf

JADE: -LUNGES AT HER!!!-(edited)

ROXY: !! =BLIPS, or tries to back for the door. tHESE ARE SOME STRESSFUL SECONDS IN THE VOID=

JADE: -gdi. She claws around the empty space, growling.- ill find you!!!

ROXY: =She pops on the other side of the door really and is booking it down the hall, back the way she came. NAH. NNNNNAAAAAHHHHH=

JADE: -there's the sound of BOOFing and scrambling feet behind her-

ROXY: =fuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuck, what to do, gotta think gotta think gotta think. Where can she hide? She doesn't KNOW this place. UUGHHHHHHHH! She's doing her BEST here just, SLAPS a pen holder off a desk she runs by FUCK THIS SHIT, YEET!=

JADE: -BORK BORK BORK BORK!! The pen holder jostles her, but not enough to stop her. RIP pen assortment...-

ROXY: =Can she.... throw a stick??? BLIP, pops a stick into existence. A SNAUSAGE STICK chucks it down the opposite hall= FETCh!

JADE: -DAMN IT. HER WEAKNESS.-

JADE: -stops and grrs... her programming is conflicted-

ROXY: =Oh shit..... CHUCKS ANOTHER ONE= go on girl! tasty tasty!!

JADE: grrr... JADE: -RUNS AFTER IT-

JADE: -but a few moments later, she zaps in front of Roxy with a snausage in her mouth, grabbing onto her and zapping again back into her cell-

ROXY: =Fuckin!! YES OK. SO..... she can't find Jake like this or Callie.... what to do.... what to do....UGHHHHGHGH. Just hides in a little corridor while trying to think. She doesn't even know if anyone else is here but now she's doubting it? AUGH. Okay, okay okay... think. Gotta think. Where can she hide? UUUGGGH--= ACK! =DOOF. Deposited on her face in the cell, gdi=

#conchspiciousCoercer #gunhardyTemerity #tankedGnostomaniac #growingGradience

[weatheringquerist-blog]

[[The sound clearly came from the infirmary, but further shouts of surprise do not continue. In fact, it is eerily silent and moreso than usual.]]

DAVENFORTH: -Okay, so maybe he wasn't actually able to place that scream. Regardless, Davenforth wasn't sleeping well. A combination of a lot of things, a lot feelings he wasn't processing correctly...or at all. Keeping busy would help right? He rounds the corner into the infirmary, hair poofy and without its proper treatment.-

DAVENFORTH: Whats goin on here

QIRIN: =She is in the hallway in the process of stepping from wall where in her surprise she had flattened herself against it and knocked over several instruments on a medical cart. Lowering the hand she had thrown in front of her by pure reflex, she briefly rested it upon her chest then allowed it to drift down to her side.=

QIRIN: =Qirin lifted a brow to him in greeting as though she hadn't just emitted the noise.= Pleasant night, Davenforth? =On the floor in front of her in a pile of linen which had spilled from the closet rose a teal colored grub that is chirruping happily, waving her forelegs and slowly waddling her way toward the carapacian.=

DAVENFORTH: -Okay wow, that's a lot of commotion for...a grub? He raises a brow at her.- Thought someone was being murdered

DAVENFORTH: Looks like condy is enlistin em younger and younger

DAVENFORTH: Cuter too

DAVENFORTH: -Squats down to the grub- A lil messy though

QIRIN: =She knelt to the ground beside him as the grub turned her head towards Davenforth, lifting her head to sniff the air= She is not supposed to be here. Her caretakers must be wondering where she is. I must notify Miss Raziga immediately. How long has it been since we departed from Avalon? =As she continues, her voice is gradually getting more strained. She is calm however, despite hiding a great deal of panic. =

DAVENFORTH: Long enough that we cant afford to turn the ship around to bring her back -Welp....more grubs. He holds his hand out to the tiny-

DAVENFORTH: So youre not a tiny assassin huh

DAVENFORTH: Thats good because youre really sloppy

QIRIN: =Small, extended whine of despair=

QIRIN: Truly, a criminal mastermind. This was her plan all along, I know it.

GRUB: =She's squinting under the bright infirmary lights and gingerly bats at Davenforth's hand, i.e. the blurry blob in front of her=

QIRIN: This one has been following me from the brooding caverns since the Union's physicians were assigned to give the little ones health checks. I should have known something was amiss when she did not appear at the ship for her scheduled stalking within a week. =her shoulders droop= I suppose I had hoped she had finally lost interest and another lusus had selected her under their keeping.

DAVENFORTH: -Congratulations grub, you have a hand. Davenforth squints at her behind his shades- So you never told anyone she kept sneaking off

GRUB: =still squinting, she hooked her other foreleg around his hand and dragged herself forward. His hand is going into her mouth, and she subsequently began to nibble at it.=

QIRIN: Of course I did. Dirk has known of these occurances since he caught me returning one day. At the time, I told no one as it was merely a minor issue and I felt it was unnecessary to inconvenience staff. The caretakers of the mothergrub know. Some of them thought this to be quite funny.

DAVENFORTH: -Ugh...gross...this is his life now- Looks like shes got somethin in common with jin

QIRIN: Jin? =She's a little out of the loop=

GRUB: =Now that the meat has been sufficiently tenderized, it is time to scale this mountain.=

DAVENFORTH: -Just gonna let this grub climb on him.- Uh yeah

DAVENFORTH: Me and lif have a grub

DAVENFORTH: Thing just kept stalkin her so she decided to keep it shes a limeblood

DAVENFORTH: A statistical impossibility

DAVENFORTH: Like me being a parent

DAVENFORTH: Which apparently i am now

QIRIN: =Her eyes trail from Davenforth to the grub, who is now crawling up the length of his arm=

QIRIN: =she snickered= Congratulations. It should have been expected with the way impossibilities seem possible on this ship. Trolls caring for the own, mystical abilities, coming back from dead. Even you, Dave, becoming a guardian.

DAVENFORTH: Yeah no shut up im not supposed to be a parent

QIRIN: And why is that?

GRUB: =Now perched upon his shoulder, she continues her exploration by sticking a leg in his ear=

DAVENFORTH: -This is fine. Except it's not, and he cranes his head away like please no.-

DAVENFORTH: Because ive got no right bein apart of a kids formative years all im gonna do is fuck it up i dont even know how to take care of a kid

GRUB: =when he moves, she makes a mrrrrrp! noise=

QIRIN: ... =You and me both, Dave=

QIRIN: I am sure you would make an excellent caretaker. If not, there are many on this ship from who you can take advice.

QIRIN: Your namesake, for instance. He has a child of his own.

DAVENFORTH: First things first im his namesake

DAVENFORTH: Im not askin my little nephew about baby pointers

QIRIN: You will have to forgive me for that slip up. Blame it on the fact that I am still reeling from the shock of a grub leaping at my face from what was supposed to be a harmless linen closet. =She laughed again=

QIRIN: Are you betting your child's life on a matter of pride, Dave? ^_^

DAVENFORTH: No cuz lifera is a great mom the kid is halfway in good hands

QIRIN: And why not make "the kid full way in good hands"?

DAVENFORTH: Because my hands aint good for raisin kids -Speaking of, he plucks up the grub into his hands and boops her nose-

QIRIN: =eyes those hands= You are not providing sufficient evidence to prove your theory correct.

DAVENFORTH: Playing with a kid and actually helping them grow without fuckin em up are two different things

GRUB: =looks astonished by the boop and waggles her legs around trying to find the source of what did it=

QIRIN: =she glances at the bby troll, slightly concerned. The eyedrops hadn't improved her vision problems, and Qirin wouldn't know more information until pupation.=

QIRIN: You have barely begun. How are you so sure of this?

DAVENFORTH: -Squints at the little grubby and places his hand over her eyes, kind of shielding it from the light-

DAVENFORTH: Because its me and if theres one thing i know its me

GRUB: =squints a little less=

QIRIN: =she watches this interaction closely. He wouldn't be a good father my ass.=

QIRIN: So. What you are saying is that you have already resolved to failure and you are not even going to attempt it?

DAVENFORTH: Its the light thats botherin you huh yeah its stupid bright in here -Bye Qirin-

QIRIN: Why is it when I come close to making my point, you divert the subject?

QIRIN: =She huffs and gets up to stand to fix the lighting situation, because he may be onto something there.=

DAVENFORTH: Whats that rami

QIRIN: =She flicks off the lights to that portion of the hallway and dims the others to the floor lights so that they arent sitting in complete darkness.=

QIRIN: I am trying to state you will not know until you try, and there is absolutely no harm in asking for advice from those who know the subject of childrearing.

QIRIN: =she began picking up the linen that had fallen to the floor, neatly stacking them back in the closet again.=

QIRIN: You can either accept that there are certain subjects of which you are unaware, and pursue sources of knowledge to rectify that. Or you can make no attempt and remain ignorant. ^_^

DAVENFORTH: Pffft and here you are preachin again look i know what i know and i know what i dont

DAVENFORTH: Didnt know a damn thing about being my own manager and i figured that out

DAVENFORTH: If youre so high and mighty as a parent then why dont you take care of this one instead of screamin bloody murder

QIRIN: =she seems aghast at the prospect.=

QIRIN: Dave, I know that I may sound—

GRUB: =At the adjustment of the lighting, the grub's eyes turn spherical and she chirrs. Nibbling Davenforth's fingers in thanks, she makes a subsequent beeline for the Carapacian.=

QIRIN: =eyes the grub almost fearfully= ....incredibly...hypocritical....

GRUB: =starts crawling up Qirin's skirts=

QIRIN: But I literally know nothing of the subject. When I was cloned, childrearing was not written into the construct of my DNA. I have no intrinsic knowledge of how to care for the upbringing of my own kind, and I especially do not have the knowledge of how to care for children of another species.

GRUB: =Slides back down the fabric of her leg=

QIRIN: =slightly distressed= Oh, little one, I do not fit the requirements necessary to be your caretaker. D:

QIRIN: Surely, there are others far more qualified.

GRUB: =tries climbing up her leg again=

DAVENFORTH: No one is born with child testing in their dna

DAVENFORTH: Besides

DAVENFORTH: You wont know know until you try and theres no harm in asking for advice from those who know

DAVENFORTH: You can either accept that there are certain subjects of which you are unaware and pursue sources of knowledge to rectify that or you can make no attempt and remain ignorant

DAVENFORTH: B|

QIRIN: :(

QIRIN: I admit I dug my own grave there.

DAVENFORTH: Theres always someone more qualified

DAVENFORTH: Just because i think im gonna fuck the kid up dont mean i wont try

QIRIN: Well.

QIRIN: That is good, then.

QIRIN: Effort is always commendable.

QIRIN: However Dave, this is an entirely different situation that I—

GRUB: =manages to crawl up her side and into the crook of one of Qirin's arms=

QIRIN: =her arm automatically (and subconciously) moved to cradle the grub.=

GRUB: =She snuggles in, just wanting to be held.=

QIRIN: =horrified=

QIRIN: This is a manner of...of...of mistaken identity! I am no lusus!

#in which a stowaway #tenaciousgodliness

[gulescamisade]

Minnesota:  Day 4

JAKE: -Another night is going by, he's pretty sure. And he's so sweaty, hungry, and thirsty. If their captors had left food or water for him, Jake promptly turned it down as he felt was the NATURAL THING TO DO. He heard what became of those mushroom tests from LOWAS. None of this was exactly ideal... He groans miserably, rubbing his tum of awful hunger pains. The headaches and dry throat.-

JAMES: -continuing his meditation and fasting. Energy continues to be conserved and though he is hungry, it's not the worst he's experienced. He only hopes the fact that it's gone quiet these past few hours can only be a good thing. No news is good news, James tells himself. It's the only thing he can do.-

ROXY: =Things seem quiet..... she leans against her wall and tap tap........ who's next to her. TAPS=

JAMES: -The only one who is paying attention is James. Leans back to the wall and taps in response.-

JAKE: -curled up in a ball, having cried himself into another headache nap.-

ROXY: =Baby no........ she taps out [HOLD ONTO YOUR BUTT] in morse code then POOFs over into the next cell.=

JAMES: -sitting crosslegged with his whole button up and slack combos. Professional even in these dire circumstances. James looking a little haggard what with his hair out of place, but still alert. Ready for action if need be.- ROXY.

JAMES: ....I AM RELIEVED TO SEE YOU.

JAMES: YOU ARE NOT HURT, ARE YOU?

ROXY: =She's definitely been sweating but she didn't wanna flaunt her powers too much since they expect shit of her but... she can't just. Let them go without. Whoever else is here. She rushes over to him too= glad 2 see u too im fine

ROXY: u gotta grocery list? im ur gal call me target cuz wal marts 2 trashy and im the height of supermarket class

ROXY: not whole foods class tho thats borderin in2 pretentious

JAMES: -knits his eyebrows.- ...ARE YOU OFFERING FOOD?

ROXY: anythin u need that u can hide and food definitely

JAMES: -nods promptly- WATER. DRIED FRUIT. CRACKERS. PROTEINS. ANYTHING WITH NUTRITIONAL VALUE.(edited)

ROXY: gotcha =she finger waggles up a storm dropping two sturdy sacks of water, dried fruits in thin bags along with crackers and little bite-sized pieces of protein bars=

JAMES: -seems to be wiggling something out of the sole of his shoe.-

JAMES: -as it turns out, it is a single playing card. Flips it over the supplies as kind of single-slot emergency sylladex and stores it away.-

JAMES: I CANNOT EXPRESS MY GRATITUDE. BUT QUICKLY.

JAMES: TEND TO THE OTHER PRISONERS. JAKE IS HERE.(edited)

ROXY: =That's so cool... and a good idea= hope u dont mind me stealin ur idea.....

ROXY: =gestures to the other wall= is he over here u think? =taps??? TAPS=

JAMES: IT'S QUITE POSSIBLE. -What with hearing him yowl up a storm before.-

JAMES: TREAD CAREFULLY.

ROXY: never but ill try =two finger salute and BLIPS into the cell next to James'=

JAKE: -lying huddled in his corner like a sad dog, his back turned towards the door. Something about the BLIP stirs him awake, however, and he begins to wake up. Squinting with a bleariness around.- ....Rock and rolloxy?

ROXY: .....baby...... :C

ROXY: i gotta make it quick but do u need a hug?

JAKE: -it even hurts to cry but he's doing it anyway, rolling up to sit.- Yes... 8'C

ROXY: awww cmere =quickly shuffles over to give him a big strong hug=

ROXY: tell me wut u need and we can work it out... idk where we are and idk how many of us are in here....

ROXY: idk where everyone else is

JAKE: -weeps into her shoulder. Two smelly baras hugging it out.- Ive no idea either. Its—

JAKE: Cant i know if my sons are alright?? Oh rox its so cruel.

ROXY: i... wish i knew jakey boy.... if i could id get us a thing to try n get in2 this system but... that needs time and theyd be onto me lol...... not lol

ROXY: but well get outta this mess

JAKE: -scrubs at his face, so blotched and red with tears.- Well... well bust out of here! I know we will!

JAKE: And when we do they wont even know what hit them!

JAKE: Id do so right now if you gave the word. -looks off.- Maybe...

JAKE: Someone can help us?

ROXY: maybe but right now we can help each other =cups his face and kisses his forehead= ROXY: ill go scopin later.... try 2 see whats up

ROXY: maybe i can find every1

ROXY: but rn tell me what u need

JAKE: -smiles for the first time in a few days, warmed by the gesture. But then remembers what he's doing.- Shit uhh—

JAKE: Water and substantial edibles i think is a good start. -rubs his sad empty tum.-

ROXY: its the best start =smiles back at him then gets to work just giving him the same supplies she gave James= just hide em when someone comes u kno

ROXY: prison smugglin drills

JAKE: !!!

JAKE: Cripes this is just like magic...

JAKE: ... -looks around his cell.-

JAKE: Where ought i hide it?

ROXY: mmm ..... i might hafta steal a idea i saw from james hes ur neighbor btw

ROXY: =focuses......... tries to make the one dump sylladex card= this might work i think slip it in ur mustache lol or just like somewhere discreet

JAKE: Holy moly! -accepts the 1 dump sylladex card if she manages it.- Is this what i think it is?

JAKE: -Automatically believing that it's a 1 dump sylladex card so whether she DOES manage it, the card is already what she intends it to be.-

JAKE: -giving it a look over- :D

JAKE: -tucks it into the safety of his back pocket. Sitting on it now.-

ROXY: =bless u jake= good beans bby

ROXY: ill be back sometime keep ur spirits up ok?

JAKE: Yes ma am o whamma! -salutes her swiftfly. His spirits are in much better places than they were before.-

ROXY: good! =poof, she's outta there=

JAKE: -brimming with hope now and makes swift work of these dried fruits. Chugs what he can of the water.-

JAKE: -wiping off his mustache, he feels his willpower RENEWED. Better than ever.-

JAKE: -And if Roxy can pull her magic off, why the blazes can't he??? Jake rolls to stand, channeling that spark of hope to manifestation.-

(DIRK): -he puts the MAN in MANIFEST. extends leg, here is brain ghost dirk.-

(DIRK): Hey, that's the first time you summoned me consciously and not as the result of a homoerotic fantasy. Good job.

JAKE: -jumps as his voice comes up but brightens his scruffy self up immediately.- Dirk!

JAKE: Brain ghost! Youre here!

(DIRK): Yeah.

(DIRK): What are you gonna do with me now that I'm here? -lol and then what-

JAKE: -swiftly whaps the ishades off his face.- Give me that!

(DIRK): What the fuck. -covers his face. DON'T LOOK AT ME. he's being ironic mostly-

JAKE: -thrusting them onto his own face. Instant computer.- Hoo. Alright now. I need to contact the crew.

JAKE: Mind if i hornswoggle you of your pester client? Of course you do! -logging into his account.-

(DIRK): My pester client is imaginary, but alright.

JAKE: Huh? No its not? -It's not, Dirk. Look at it working. How??? Magic is how.-

(DIRK): -fucking incredible-

(DIRK): -obnoxiously hovers behind him-

(DIRK): It's almost like you have the ability to make anything a reality.

JAKE: -typing frantically, heart hammering as it actually DOES seem to work.- Shut up will you???

(DIRK): A dude summons you into his realm of existance just to tell you to shut up. Nice one.

JAKE: -Seeing everyone online makes his insides lurch painfully so he's only half paying attention to BGD. His franticness making his eyes water again as in the middle of the message, the connection severs.- Its—

JAKE: Its breaking up! -says with his concentration fizzling.-

(DIRK): Well don't give up.

(DIRK): Do something about it.

JAKE: Im trying damn you! Cant you see?? -says, clutching at the shades.-

(DIRK): And I'm telling you to try harder.

(DIRK): You have it in you to do this.

JAKE: -practically choking with frustration and wills the last bit of connection out of sheer spite. The last message gets through before cutting off completely.-

(DIRK): ...

(DIRK): There you go.

JAKE: -He is just never going to stop being tearstruck at this point. Obligatorily hands BGD his shades.-

JAKE: -His vision is swimming as his hand drops, looking at brain ghost now. Dirk knows Jake loves him doesn't he? Of course he does, a voice tells Jake predictably. It's what he wants to hear, it's the truth that he knows deep down in his heart and it's what BGD was basically scripted to say.-

JAKE: -So why was he still so miserable? He's gotta ask anyway.-

JAKE: He knows i love him right? Id do anything for him?

(DIRK): ... Of course he knows that.

(DIRK): He's probably driving himself up a wall cuz he can't tell you the same thing.

JAKE: -wipes at his nose.- I miss him something tremendous.

JAKE: You would think dodging near death experiences on a regular basis would make this easier to bear. But it doesnt.

JAKE: It really doesnt.

(DIRK): They're coming for you, you know. -he knows this because jake has to know this.-

(DIRK): ... -offers jake his hand to hold-

JAKE: -takes the hand, too dried up to cry in earnest anymore. His shoulders only sag.- At least i have you.

(DIRK): You'll always have me.

JAKE: -keeps their fingers twined together but gives up once their shoulders brush. Just rests his head against BGD, tired all over again.- Jeez louise dirk....

JAKE: Youre always so.

JAKE: You.

(DIRK): It's no coincidence. -leans on him too-

(DIRK): That's the way you want me to be.

JAKE: Shucks. Then i must be stock full of good ideas. -lets his eyes start to drift closed...-

(DIRK): Must be. -yes shhh sleep. it'll get better soon. just believe in that, jake-

JAKE: -having close company to fall asleep with is infitintely better than sleeping alone. Jake has decided this here and now.- 

#tankedGnostomaniac #practicalFamiliar #gunhardyTemerity

[gulescamisade]

Mega Texas:  Day 1

[ Dirk, Nepeta, Sollux, Tavros, Equius, Aradia, Signless, Summoner, Tyrena and Disciple all find themselves blipping suddenly onto the hot, scorching ground. Snapping back to reality and here comes gravity. They find themselves closely scattered in a Wal-Mart parking lot. The cars are here, aren’t they always, only some of these are broken into, which is another common thing. Beside them there is a judgemental moo from cows watching as these weirdos appeared from nowhere and decided to take a nap on the asphalt. Their hair still static-y from the trip, touching one of the abandoned carts seems like a bad idea man. Real bad. ]

DIRK: -DOOF. he lands on his ass.- ... What the fuck?

DIRK: -looks around. wal-mart... fucked up cars...-

DIRK: -a weird looking horse?-

DIRK: -could he be in the fabled land of his birth?-

NEPETA: =TAIL FRIZZES AND HISSES=

EQUIUS: -How dare you. He is in perfect condition. This Wal-Mart, however, is not. Equius stands with a groan.-

NEPETA: =THE CLAWS ARE OUT=

DIRK: -nah, that's a ridiculous conclusion to jump to...-

TYRENA: -drags herself up from the floor-

DIRK: -gets up, surveying the group and takes a head count.- Everyone okay?

TYRENA: -a little bit of a hISS as she does-

TYRENA: 0NLY SUPERF1C1ALLY >:)

TYRENA: -STALKS AND HOBBLES a few steps, bare feet on the hot ground.- TYRENA: BLEH

SIGNLESS: -Ahh, nothing like suddenly APPEARING SOMEWHERE ELSE. First thing to register when his feet hit the ground is that its very hot, but heat he can handle, what he cant handle is trying to guess what just happened.-

SIGNLESS: Would someone.... kindly fill me in on what has just happened. -Squints as he looks around at all the cars and cows.-

EQUIUS: -He's sweating abhorrently, and the heat is making him a little...sluggish-

TYRENA: 1 PR0M1SE NO K1NDNESS

TYRENA: 1T WAS A TRAP

SOLLUX: -just laying face down on the ground.-

ARADIA: -she had a soft landing...but sollux...he needed to fall flat on his face. it was important. so she just waits for him to get up.-

NEPETA: =Scampers around anxiously, scampers over Sollux. Sits on him and kneads=

NEPETA: =With claws=

NEPETA: =Hello=

SOLLUX: 0w.

SOLLUX: guess i'm still alive. c00l.

SOLLUX: -muffled into pavement-

DIRK: ... -hoists him-

DIRK: We're missing most of the crew.

DIRK: -pats himself down... his comm device is still on him. hmm.-

NEPETA: =Doofs off Sollux as he's lift and scampers again before climbing Equius=

SOLLUX: -is hoist- l00ks like nepeta is 0kay.

TYRENA: YES

TYRENA: THEY ARE M1SS1NG YOU, EQUALLY, 1'M SURE

SOLLUX: every0ne stand still and wait f0r me t0 st0p tasting c0ncrete s0 i can figure 0ut wh0's here.

DIRK: I'm gonna try to get ahold of everyone else. Hold up.

ARADIA: im here

SOLLUX: 0h hey AA.

EQUIUS: D --> Are you...okay, Nepeta? Aradia as well. Everyone else

NEPETA: :33 <sure this is grrrrrrrrreat blargh but im fine just furreaked out :'((

ARADIA: hi sollux

ARADIA: hi equius

ARADIA: theres nothing to be freaked out about :D

NEPETA: :33 < this is dumb >:'((

EQUIUS: D --> Stop being weirder than usual, Aradia. I concur with Nepeta

ARADIA: youre weirder than usual

ARADIA: oh wait

ARADIA: thats all the time

EQUIUS: D --> Now is not the time to wa% pitchy. Something severe has happened

ARADIA: its moderate

DIRK: -gets this random urge to kick hal's ass-

TYRENA: 1 APPRECIATE Y0UR UTTER 1ND1FFERENCE AND F1ND 1T REFRESH1NG

TYRENA: H0WEVER, 1T D0ES REVEAL A F0REKN0WLEDGE 0F TH1NGS

TYRENA: SP1LL, P1X1E, 1 KN0W H0W TH1S GAME W0RKS

TYRENA: 1'VE BEEN AT 1T F0R M0ST 0F MY L1FE

DIRK: -blurts out, holding up his comm- Hey. We're in Texas.

TYRENA: 0H

TYRENA: WHAT'S A TEXAS

ARADIA: -she smiles at tyrena- ive been through every way this could possibly go

ARADIA: i know what we have to do to get to our best end result

ARADIA: but in every circumstance that i choose to tell you what to do next

ARADIA: it all ends horrifically

TYRENA: HA

TYRENA: 1F Y0U 1NS1ST

TYRENA: 1 AM N0 HYP0CR1TE, AT LEAST

SOLLUX: welc0me t0 hell.

ARADIA: welcome to hell

SOLLUX: yeah.

DIRK: -looks a little distressed-

DIRK: ... Alright, everybody.

DIRK: I've gathered that the crew's been split up into groups, presumably all around the US. We're going to try to meet up in Minnesota.

DIRK: The kids are still on the ship, but Porrim is looking after them. Think she's got the bots helping her too.

TYRENA: HM

TYRENA: 1 SUPP0SE 1T 1S A PLAN, 1F N0TH1NG ELSE

DIRK: Sollux, come with me. We're gonna try to hot wire some of these cars. -drags him, but also because he wants to talk to him-

ARADIA: -smiles as they go-

SOLLUX: hhff. -is DRAG.- h0w fucking 0ld is this techn0l0gy even g0ing t0 be, this is g0nna suck.

DIRK: We weren't transported back in time, asshole. I'm sure it's fine. -he assumes-

DIRK: ... -quiet for a second after he jimmies a door open- I don't know where Jake and Roxy are.

SOLLUX: -no human technology suuuuucks. whine whine. but also quiets himself after that.- SOLLUX: ... 0kay. uhh.

SOLLUX: fuck.

DIRK: I'm trying not to freak out. Not while I still gotta give everyone direction. -leeeans into the driver's seat and starts fucking around with the car.-

NEPETA: :33 < its purrretty hard to not freak out :((

NEPETA: =crawls in the car and starts to scratch the seat immediately= :33 < where can we even go in texass?

TYRENA: AWAY FR0M TEXAS

DIRK: -SUDDENLY A CAT- ... Yeah, that's the plan, actually.

DIRK: Probably best we lay low too. As much as I'd love to sight see.

SOLLUX: jegus nepeta.

NEPETA: :33 < i can help scout...... =mnng, jumps out and starts to prowl around........= and also get dinner =STARES at cows=

NEPETA: =MEAT=

DIRK: Don't you dare kill that horse.

NEPETA: =tilts head and snorts=

NEPETA: :33 < thats a silly looking horse!!

EQUIUS: D --> It's an udderbeast. A, oh fizzlewinks, what do humans call it again? Oh yes, a cow -And Nepeta better leave it alone-

DIRK: He's just a lil chunky.

ARADIA: -joins the rest of them-

NEPETA: :33 < a chunky hunk of FOOD

EQUIUS: D --> Cease

NEPETA: :33 < im trying to feed the pack :30

SOLLUX: can s0me0ne take a chunky hunk 0f shut the fuck up while i'm trying to blindly help h0twire this scuttlebuggy?

SOLLUX: in case y0u f0rg0t the tech guy was blind.

NEPETA: =leans next to Sollux=

NEPETA: :33 < (is the shut fuck tender and juicy.... like steak?) =mrps softly= i pawlieve in you!

SOLLUX: ggghhhhh.

ARADIA: im assuming youre pretty talented with your scents to know whawt youre doing by now

EQUIUS: -Plucks Nepeta up. Let him work-

SOLLUX: -mocking her- i'm assuming y0u're pretty talented with y0ur dick by n0w t0 blah blah blah my ass.

SOLLUX: -sparks fly as he touches two wires together- 0W FUCK.

ARADIA: i mean yes

ARADIA: i was waiting for that

SOLLUX: Y0U WERE WAITING F0R MY ASS?

ARADIA: for you to get shocked

ARADIA: after saying that

SOLLUX: AA can y0u st0p being super fucking creepy f0r tw0 sec0nds and try being slightly m0re s0cially acceptable? like ask if i'm 0kay 0r s0mething???

ARADIA: are you ok

ARADIA: you are

ARADIA: i can answer that

DIRK: -he's just watching this happen tbh-

SOLLUX: i'm-- g0d damn it.

SOLLUX: -throws hands up-

ARADIA: ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

SOLLUX: !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

ARADIA: :D

DIRK: -and with that, he manages to get it to start running- Nice.

DIRK: This wouldn't be possible without the sacrifices you made, babe. I'm so proud of you.

TYRENA: -climbs onto the roof of the car.-

SOLLUX: y0u're WELC0ME, every0ne!

SOLLUX: what the fuck is that.

ARADIA: tyrena

SOLLUX: figures.

DIRK: Important question... Who all knows how to drive a car?

NEPEPTA: :33 < i do!

DIRK: Cool. We're gonna need a few people cuz we ain't all fittin' in one.

DIRK: -moves onto another car to get that one running.-

TYRENA: 1 CAN DR1VE

SOLLUX: Y0U'RE BLIND.

SOLLUX: HA HA.

TYRENA: YES, Y0U ARE

SOLLUX: yeah.

SOLLUX: -SIGHS.-

SOLLUX: -he's more agitated because he misses Terezi already.-

EQUIUS: D --> I can navigate one of these rudimentary vehicles well enough

SOLLUX: kn0wing y0u, y0u'll break the wheel 0r kick a h0le in the fl00rb0ard bef0re y0u get this thing past the ugly h0rse.

DIRK: -keeps an eye on those two... no strangling this time.-

EQUIUS: D --> I could just as easily put a hole in you -This heat is doing wonders for his anger-

NEPETA: =puts her foot on Equius' cheek=

DIRK: Don't make me come over there.

ARADIA: -pats equius's arm- but you wont

SOLLUX: i dunn0 aa i think we have time t0 find 0ut.

DIRK: For fuck's sake, my dude.

SOLLUX: let's just be real ab0ut 0ur handicaps here. i'm blind and he's freakishly hulking.

EQUIUS: -There's a neck vein or three bulging-

ARADIA: hes big

NEPETA: =Puts her foot on the neck veins, mrps=

NEPETA: :33 < if i cant eat the weird horse ill eat mew both fur survival!

SOLLUX: at least i'll be put t0 g00d use.

NEPETA: :33 < purr bones would make a nice broth

ARADIA: -whacks sollux's arm-

EQUIUS: D --> As what? A post dinner tooth picking tool

NEPETA: :33 < no equihiss purr the picking tool fur my teeth! >:00

EQUIUS: D --> You've already e%pended your use, Captor

NEPETA: :33 < BLARRRRRGGHH =ascends the horse and gets on his shoulders, hand over the mouth= shush

DIRK: -okay, he's coming back over.-

SOLLUX: 0W.

SOLLUX: what was that f0r???

[In the not so far distance, a shitty jpeg skateboard gently floats to the ground]

ARADIA: you hit your daily verbal self deprecation limit a long time ago

DIRK: Are we really doing this right now? Because I'm not in the fucking mood to br-- .....................

DIRK: -stares at the skateboard-

SOLLUX: excuse me?? that d0esn't exist.

SOLLUX: .... br.

ARADIA: -just smiles at the skateboard. HAHAHA it's kind of funny this time around-

DIRK: ... -picks up the skateboard-

SOLLUX: br???

SOLLUX: dirk???

DIRK: Bruh.

SOLLUX: 0h 0kay.

[It's just...So shitty. It's UNREAL, how poor the quality of this thing is. It feels like it's going to break apart in his hands. There's no way anyone actually ever rode this thing]

DIRK: ... -captchalogues this-

DIRK: Anyway, I got the other car running so let's split up.

SOLLUX: sure thing gang.

DIRK: Watch me swooce right in. -pushes sollux into the passenger's seat so he can get into the driver's seat.-

SOLLUX: hrrf. -scrunches up his little stick noodle body-

EQUIUS: -Grumbles off to the other with Nep-

NEPETA: =Pats his sweaty face, softly shushing=

DIRK: -BYE BITCH. just kidding. he likes equius but he can't abide anybody flexing threateningly at his husband. sorry bro.-

ARADIA: -she'll stay in here. for reasons. BYE EQUIUS KISS KISS LOVE YA BYE BYE-

EQUIUS: -He'll break everything-

DIRK: -leads the way further north with his gps guiding them. it's gonna be a long night.-

#technetronicTactician #arseniccaudal #twofoldacrimony #adiosTauromachy #caballineTrottage #artifactualAnnihilation #ironInfidelity #arcadianTroubadour #sybillineAutonomy #apostolicChronicler

[transient-tutor]

DEREK: -alright, so, it's new year's eve... riley's pregnant so it would be shitty to drink around her... and they're on the ship, which he has learned means he CAN'T set off fireworks (which is frankly bullshit) so he's left with very few options for the celebration.- 

DEREK: -good thing there are such substitutes as sparkling champagne and a creative mind. as well as a sylladex filled with all sorts of bullshit from his time traveling across the universe doing whatever jobs came his way.- 

DEREK:  -it's almost midnight and he's very carefully arranging every color of SMUPPET around the room, a good distance from wherever riley is sitting.-

RILEY: -she sits on their bed, watching him and she's been so into whatever the hell she's watching on a device that she doesn't realize what he's doing until she does all all at once. and she sits straight up, frowning- oh, no. no way. why are you doing this to me? jesus christ.

DEREK: Just hold on. -holds hands up defensively and then places down the final smuppet- 

DEREK: Alright. Its almost midnight. -goes to sit with her- 

DEREK: Hey. I just remembered we were hangin out for new years eve last year too. 

DEREK: Good times. -snorts-

RILEY: baby, whyyyyyy. -she pouts when he comes over and leans against his arm. She snorts too- oh my god. 

RILEY: hey, we can make out all we want this time.

DEREK: Youre right. -grins, leaning in to smooch her cheek. he inspects the time again... he's got a timer up on his comm device.- 

DEREK: Here we go. You ready? -suddenly produces something else from his sylladex... it looks like... a detonator?? um.-

RILEY:  -stares at the detonator looking thing and back at him- what are you blowing up now? -she's interested tho. things exploding...exciting...-

DEREK: -WONKS.- 

DEREK: 3... 2... 1... -PUSHES BUTTON and the whole line of smuppets slowly start to expand... until they're POPPING into bits of colored fabric and fluff.-

RILEY: -she's actually impressed by this when these things are getting destroyed. She claps- whoo! blow them up! happy fucking new year!

DEREK: -laughs- I knew youd like that. 

DEREK: Happy new year baby. -tilts her chin towards him for a proper kiss-

RILEY: -she kisses him sweetly back, not taking this one for granted- happy new year. 

RILEY: next time there's gonna be 3 of us.

DEREK: -slips an arm around her shoulders to draw her in closer.- Crazy to think about. 

DEREK: Reminds me... We still havent decided on a name yet.

RILEY: -leans against him completely  and puts her arms around his middle, kissing his arm- first decision of this year. 

RILEY: not a bad one at all. 

RILEY: -peers up at him- wanna toss some ideas out there?

DEREK: Well. 

DEREK: Ive been tryna look for some names usin my... usual method of namin conventions. 

DEREK: So names kinda like our own right? -dirk and derek... he's very creative- 

DEREK: Ryans a good ole irish name like Riley is. -smirks a little about it-

RILEY: -she grins just thinking about it- fuck. that's a good one. i mean...my first pick is still roley. 

RILEY: -her expression softens- ryan's a really cute name.

DEREK: -grins wider. he did a good...- Right? 

DEREK: Not usually a girls name but fuck it.

RILEY: well, it goes both ways like mine does. -she sighs a little- i kind of love it.

DEREK: Yeah? 

DEREK: Do we got a winner then? -rubs at her shoulder-

RILEY: -she nods- yeah. that was...really fucking easy. ryan. 

RILEY: ryan strider.

DEREK: Sounds right. 

DEREK: Way to go me.

RILEY: yeah. 

RILEY: good job, baby. -she has no doubt that this is the perfect name, but there are other things she can't help questioning. the same things that have been reassured to her over and over again. and she hates that they're still thoughts that cross her mind and nearly make her sick- 

RILEY: you know. i'm kind of tired. i wanna go to bed, i think.

DEREK: -blinks at her, surprised to hear this so suddenly.- Yeah? You sure? 

DEREK: Gonna make me clean up this mess I made all on my own? -gestures  to the smuppet REMAINS-

RILEY: -she pulls away from him- yeah. hormones or whatever. making me sleepy. like they do. -she wastes no more time in getting under the covers, turning away from him and staring at the wall.-

DEREK: -frowns... then slides into the covers next to her, getting his arm around her middle.-

RILEY: -stop being so good right now, shit. she puts her hand on his arm like she's about to move it  before just taking it off and deciding not to make it worse like that. she can't stop the tears, but if she holds her breath, he can't notice her shaking for at least a few seconds-

DEREK: -it's nothing she can hide. he already knows shes upset and he presses a kiss to the side of her head, muttering into her hair.- Whats up?

RILEY: -she closes her eyes at the kiss, feeling his lips move against her as he talks to her. She gives in, sniffling finally and letting herself cry- she's so real. 

RILEY: she has a name now and she's 

RILEY: she's just. 

RILEY: not an idea anymore. 

RILEY: she's ryan and she's ours and i-- -she's quiet for a few moments- i don't want to let her down. 

RILEY: but I could. 

RILEY: and that's. -she just stops there-

DEREK: Hey... Theres nothin to worry about. 

DEREK: You know I get thoughts like that too. But things aint how they were. Remember that. 

DEREK: Besides... If either of us fucks up too much we got people to put us back in our place. 

DEREK: Ryans gonna be alright.

RILEY: -she's quiet before she wordlessly turns over to bury her face in his chest-

DEREK: -pulls her in closer, showering her in more comforting kisses.-

RILEY: -mumbles into his chest- stop being so nice to me.

DEREK: No fuck you. I do what I want. -smooch smooch-

RILEY: i know you do. i hate it. -she's smiling a little tho-

#robynsaint #in which new year new changes