Here you go, crab enjoyer. I know you’ve been asking for coconut crab for a while now lol
What a big guy! Though it is a crab and therefore majority carapace instead of skin or fat, it does have a big ol’ badonker so it can get a little chunk. While it is a pretty regular looking crab in my opinion, I do think that it is recognizable when compared to other crabs. Especially since I believe that it’s one of the largest (or THE largest) species of land crab. It gets to have a little higher than average funk. I could not find any information on its slime or mucous secretion, so I am left to assume that it is a dry little guy.
Overall: 5/10
A very solid and interesting crab. I feel like I would find them a lot more interesting if I could see one in real life, but from photos alone it does not have the ‘wow factor’ for me.
@derinthescarletpescatarian told me to upload this because Tumblr loves crabs, so here: purple crab hours.
Accidental music is She Swallowed Burning Coals by El Tigre.
Could I persuade you to rate the red egg crab? I love him, he so creechur.
Today on CHUNK! FUNK! GUNK! We rate
the RED EGG CRAB:
0.5/10 Chunk
4/10 Funk
0-1/10 Gunk
Crabs are all exoskeleton, so low chunk. The red egg crab also generally looks like most other crabs, low funk. I couldn’t find anything on their mucous or slime secretion, so I am left to assume there is little to none. Low gunk.
Overall Rating: 8/10
They are truly so creechur. I would slap a little slab of butter and pour some syrup on top of this walking pancake. Crabs are adorable, truly. What a guy!!
(Quick reminder that the overall rating is NOT an average of the 3 categories, it is just my personal rating of the creature based on how much I like it.)
“I am America. I am the part you won’t recognize. But get used to me. Black, confident, cocky; my name, not yours; my religion, not yours; my goals, my own; get used to me.” —Muhammad Ali