#by the end nothing mattered to her except for protecting Lev | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

saphicfreshman · 4 years

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Spoilers tlou 2!!!

A lot of people seem to think that the entire message of the game is that violence is bad but I actually think that there is soo much more to it... (I'm gonna ramble about a lot of things and it's gonna be quite long, so sorry in advance. Also this is just my personal take on it. Please, don't feel offended if you see it differently)

1. As a player we feel incredible hatred towards Abby as a character after she kills Joel and we simply want to hurt her in the same way. We despise her, which is a natural human reaction. However, the point in this game is that it forces us to see the other perspective. It forces us to admit that maybe we weren't playing the heroes because in this game nobody is. This game revolves around humans and what they have to do to survive.

2. A lot of people complain that the game judges your actions or makes you feel guilty. It never explicitly judges anything. It simply shows you the different perspectives and that you feel guilty is on you, not on the game because through the game, we as the player realize that our actions had consequences and that we didn't just kill NPCs but humans who had friends and families and had their own personality. This makes the game so much more realistic.

3. If you don't play this game narrow-minded, you will see that Ellie and Abby have exactly the same motives. They both seek revenge for the same reason and even though Abby killed our beloved character Joel, we have to admit that Ellie and Tommy killing most of her friends and Joel killing her father the surgeon were pretty good reasons to justify her actions. We aren't supposed to love Abby after all she killed Joel but we are supposed to sympathize with her and at least I can say that it truly worked for me. At the beginning I only wanted revenge for Joel but on that beach scene I truly didn't want to see her die and I didn't want to fight against her.

4. I've heard many people say that the game forces you to dislike Ellie or to see Joel as the villain. I don't agree with this statement at all. The flashbacks we see of Joel and Ellie make Joel seem like such an amazing guy and make him even more loveable. We see that his relationship with Ellie grew even stronger until she found out that he had lied about the fireflies and we saw that Joel got softer in the years after the first game. He seemed to open up a bit more and I think that is due to his peaceful life in Jackson. I loved that development and I think that is also the reason why he told Abby's group his real name. He didn't see them as a threat since Jackson welcomed outsiders and constantly took new people in.

Concerning Ellie's storyline: Yes, she makes a lot of bad choices and I didn't want her to go down this path but I also understood why she did it. I don't hate her, if anything I feel sorry for her and want to protect her even more because of everything she's been through. Yes, she did threaten Lev but I can understand why... I played through this game in a bit more than two days and when it came to the beach scene I just felt exhausted and I wanted it to stop. When we as the player already feel like that think about the character. Ellie was wounded, has left her family and has done horrible things to get to Abby and now Abby refuses to fight her. Everything she had done would have been for nothing if she didn't fight Abby. So, I personally think that Ellie was desperate and that's the reason she threatened Lev but I also think that she wouldn't have killed him if it came down to it.

5. Now that I'm already talking about the ending, I want to add that I think that assumption that Ellie has lost everything at the end of the game is wrong. Yes, she has lost a lot but at the same time she found herself again. She stopped the cycle of hatred. If the game would have ended with Dina, JJ and her it would have been incredibly sweet but it wouldn't have been a character development. Because she was forced to let Abby go after Abby defeated Ellie and Dina. Ellie didn't have another choice in this moment but in order to let go of the hatred, she had to spare Abby out of her own volition. At the end she regained some sense of humanity and there's still hope for her. At least that is what I got from that ending. In my opinion the reasons why she spared Abby are these two things:

1) Through the flashback she saw Joel and realized that no matter what she did he was gone and nothing could bring him back. At the same time she probably remembered Joel for who he had been in the last few years and what he would have wanted her to do.

2) She thought about Lev who had nobody except for Abby which is such a strong parallel to Ellie and Joel. She didn't want to cause Lev the same pain and suffering by taking Abby away from him.

6. I saw many messages about how important these characters (Ellie and Joel) are to people and how they deserved better/were completely different characters in this game.

I started playing the first game when I was 14 (just like Ellie) but I was honestly a bit to scared to play through the game so I played different games until I came back to tlou a few years later and I found myself incredibly impressed with the story. I loved how despite the cruel and harsh world Ellie and Joel live in the game still made me feel happy and calm in many sections. It was such a joy to watch the relationship between Ellie and Joel develop throughout the game. Playing the dlc and finding out that Ellie is a gay woman, just as me, obviously made me love the character even more.

Nowadays, I'm 19 (again just as old as Ellie) and I have become more mature, I have to face bigger and different problems than with 14 and I see the world in a different way. (I know that was a lot of information about me, I'm sorry but I promise I try to get to a point)

In the second game Ellie isn't the innocent, sweet little girl anymore that we got to know in the first game. She has been through a lot, she has different problems now and simply life in general is a lot more complicated than with 14. A huge part of the first game was about Ellie's innocence and how she grew up in front of our eyes during the game. "It can't all be for nothing" is in my opinion such a powerful line that explains her character development in tlou 1 perfectly. In the second game she is an adult with complex and complicated relationships and a different world view. She stopped being the innocent child a long time ago and is now a grown woman who isn't dependent on Joel anymore. So, that their dynamics would change is obvious. I am sad at the tragic turn of events for Joel and Ellie in tlou part 2 but I believe that the characters are incredibly well written and just a good continuation of the first game.

7. I see many people being toxic and attacking the story saying that it is "shit", "horrible", and that a child could write a better one. And I have to say that the people who say this probably would be more content with a fanfic like story from a child that includes a nice, action adventure and a happy ending. A light-hearted story that's maybe a bit dark sometimes but overall pretty nice. But that's not what Neil had in mind, because it truly would be easy to write a story that would appease the masses and that would be a slightly different game than the first one but overall with the same atmosphere to it. I think that's what a lot of fans wanted and that's not what we got.

Instead we got an amazing story that was incredibly emotional, took turns and forced us out of our comfort zone. I know that I will never forget this gaming experience. Especially the moment where I had to attack Ellie as Abby and I truly thought I was going to kill her. I smashed the square button while at the same time repeatedly saying: "please don't die Ellie, please don't die". I've never had such a weird, conflicting experience and I have never felt so many different emotions while playing a game. If naughty dog and Neil Druckmann had given us the game we wanted, it would have been a good gameplay, amazing visuals and great music and sound choices but it would have been a story that would have tried to recreate the first one and therefore it would have been easily forgettable and not impactful.

This game just keeps on making me think about the characters, reflecting on their actions and makes me feel so many different emotions that I'm not even sure what to think. And this, at least for me, is a masterpiece.

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suffering-and-happy-about-it · 4 years

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Lost Hope (Favored Ones, Part 27.)

Series description: Many things were surely fucked up in the year 2038, but no-one ever told anyone how all of it went down. What happened before a group of people left for Seattle to handle personal matters? Why did one girl refuse to leave all of it be? And why there were so many dead in the end?

Quote for the chapter: "Don’t go chasing waterfalls...” - TLC

For those who might not catch my drift: chasing waterfalls = chasing the reader.

Part summary: Coming terms with yourself is something that is important. It’s something that you need to do in order to become the better version of yourself. Abby almost finished the process of coming to terms with all the things that were happening around her, something else made her thirst for revenge wake up again.

A/N: This chapter is from A B B Y ‘ S P O V. Be aware of that. I won’t be sorry for it, I learned to understand and to love Abby, even if I was against her when I played the game. Lev is an amazing character too. And now Mel is alive, there’s a possibility to change how Abby’s story will continue from this point.

Warnings: Depiction of torture, bone breaking, depiciton of blood and manslaughter, anxiety, rage, anger, a bit of fluff at the end.

Word count: 4.8 K

Tagging: @nemodoren @xxgoldenhour @missdictatorme @davnwillcome @pickleriiick @jodiereedus22 @gladiosamicitias @tamkashi @eternallyvenus @avengerssstuff @fangirl-inthe-us @avery-miller @mikah-writes @mad-hatter-98 @sadiaafrin99 @flavorishy @gabymiller

Series master list: H E R E

Joel Miller’s playlist for the bonfire occasions: H E R E

Youtube playlists: JACKSON DAYS | SEATTLE DAYS

Seattle, day three - evening:

The sea seemed to be serene and calm at the time their boat had taken off, it was quiet and the breeze was cold. This peaceful feeling could be simply also affected by everything they've been through so far. Even from the proximity they currently were from the island, they could still see Haven slowly burning down to the ground. Sometimes, the woman operating the boat would swear that she could hear the people screaming and guns firing. It was just the ghost of the sacred place haunting her brain, yet it was still there.

Lev, for the first half of an hour on the sea, was clinging onto the jacket Abby landed him. Then, the serene and gentle moves of the ocean made him fall asleep. The boy was now pressed into the small area between Abby's ankles, napping before they'd be back to the aquarium. The kid must've been exhausted - both emotionally and physically. That kid, who was now safely laying there squeezed into the tightest space he shouldn't be even able to fit, had killed his mother in self-defense. That kid watched his sister being shot to pieces. And he made it even though the despair, pain, and exhaustion.

It was weird to know that now, they were safe. No-one was after them. And as soon as they'd hit the aquarium, Lev, Owen, and Mel were about to leave Seattle for good in the search for the fireflies of Santa Barbara. Owen was asking Abby to join them while Melanie, with all the, despise she carried inside, had told her that once she, her boyfriend, and that Scars kids will leave Seattle, she will never want to see her goddamned face again. But now, things could change and maybe, for Lev, Abby could leave too.

That night, she had seen her family and friends being killed in the passion of the fight. For those who kids, she stood up to the only everlasting authority she blindly followed for the last couple of years - and Isaac was now killed, his corpse was rotting somewhere on the Seraphites island and Abby hoped that his body would be eaten by some wild animals to end his life in the shame he deserved. The time of WLF was coming to a sure end.

Abby's problem with the situation was as follows: soldiers were seemingly remorse-less characters lead by their general, Isaac for this instance, who just did what they were told. And for the most part, it was true. Yet, honestly, nothing hit Abby as personally as walking through the Seraphite settlement, following Lev's sister around. She, and the other WLFs, were used to seeing the best out of the best, the best warriors the Scars were able to train. And this hit different. These weren't the soldiers anywhere in sight - these were women and children, even men and other farmers who were not trained in combat - innocent people who were barely able to protect themselves were massacred ever since the WLF attack was started. That wasn't right at all. The things WLF has done on the island were wrong in every way possible.

It was all based around the battle of Seattle, which was going on for years now with occasional pauses, of course. Neither of the sides were good or bad in the situation. It was just a matter of habit - one side attacked, the other attacked back. One side overstepped the boundaries, the other reacted to this. It was this way for more than five years. Seattle was in this war ever before the time Abby and her friends arrived. And for that, she had never seen the true meaning of peaceful time in the city.

Abby wasn't looking around - the only things she saw were the ones directly in front of her eyes. She wasn't able to look behind her orders, she never needed to think about what she was doing, she just did what she was told. Until the moment she entered Jackson - and until the moment she met Lev and Yara. Jackson was a wild experience on its own.

Their small family was broken way before Jackson - Owen and Mel were now dating. And given the history of Abby and Owen, he was seeing her less and less. The final nail in the coffin being Mel's pregnancy. Nora and Whitney were taking every mission they could just to avoid her, the hospital being the last place Abby would ever see them. This left Manny being the last friend who remained by her side after Jackson was done. In the last few days, they were brought together after a long time in one way or another, but all Abby could thank was a weird coincidence of chances.

And there, there were the two siblings Abby met on her journey - Yara and Lev. At the moment, Abby had anyone except Lev - Yara was shot and killed by Abby's people during their escape from the island. It didn't matter that Abby tried to tell everyone about the kids not being any kind of threat to their cause. But it didn't matter - Yara was shot. In answer, Abby shot back at Isaac. Now, he was dead for real. She heard one of the radio communications over the WLF channel. She had done everything for the boy. Abby quite literally had sacrificed her whole known world for a boy she barely knew.

Even though all of what happened, Abby felt that every turn she made during their way revealing over the last three days, that every word and every choice set her on the right path. Now, maybe, she could get on the boat with Lev, Mel, and Owen, setting on her way to find the Fireflies again.

There was still the whole 'hunt Joel Miller down' matter. Abby was aware of the loose threads and unfinished business there was. It felt very unsatisfying, knowing she will most likely never get her revenge on the man. Her brain accepted the information some time ago. There was no climax to the whole hunt started by a piece of information given to her by an old Firefly named Eugene. The last four years were coming in vain. Was it even worth it at that point? Her family was broken to pieces, she had a kid to protect and once Lev leaves with Mel and Owen, she won't probably have any use no more. Well, if that would happen, she would travel back to Jackson. She would try to find Joel again. And Abby knew that once the guards on the gates will see her in the distance, she will be dead in the next minute.

It was more or less about coming to terms with how things were now. Before the mission to Jackson, she was sure that her life is already over. And she was sure that the only thing having the power to start it again was the murder of Joel Miller. The revenge murder if you will. That opinion was changed the moment she accepted Lev and Yara as her people. These two were just kids. Fucking kids in this fucked up world. And when Abby could keep them safe, why wouldn't she keep them safe? Joel Miller killed her dad and this was something she couldn't come around - but even if the old man wasn't dead, Abby tried to reconsider the things happening in the last few weeks, more importantly over the last two days.

Now, she wasn't out solely to revenge her father. She now had someone to protect. There was someone she needed to stay put for. It was a small family, it was sure as hell a broken one, but it was her family. No matter what Joel fucking Miller was doing, he was her last priority now. To be honest, Abby was just glad she's alive. And she'd be even more glad once she'll finally get out of Seattle - one way, on Owen's boat, or another, getting killed by the Jackson citizens. Abby was ready.

With the last remnants of her energy, she made sure the boat stays put before she started to wake Lev up. - “Hey, sleepyhead. Wake up.” - She whispered with a soft smile, nudging Lev’s shoulder as the boy started to massage his eyes. - “We’re at the aquarium. Come on. Let’s get dry.” - Abby arched her eyebrows, showing Lev another assuring smile. All she was trying to do was to keep Lev calm for now.

For sure, the boy will be freaking out for one way or another, but they didn’t have time for panic attacks at the moment. Slowly, they both walked back to the aquarium's back entrance, beaten up like two dogs. And Abby was fine with that. They were finally safe inside the building.

With a yawn, she was about to unlock the door leading to the improvised surgeon room, only to be met by the resistance of the wooden door, which never had happened before. Naturally, it piqued her interest. She tried to press harder, but it didn't lead anywhere. Mentioning for Lev to hide behind the corner, Abby started to smash her way inside. It took a few big blows with her shoulder before the door moved at least an inch. After a while, the barricade finally eased and fell on the ground. It was the damn ventilation shaft. Why in the hell had this fallen on the ground? Just as she furrowed upon thinking about the shaft, Lev noticed something else. His palm tugged Abby's top as his head motioned in the direction of a dead dog laying on the ground.

"Is that..." - Lev whispered with fear in his voice, walking closer to the animal. He was afraid of the WLF dogs ever since he had seen the first one. Why? These dogs were trained as weapons. WLF trained the animals to sniff unknown human scents, reacting to it in a matter of seconds - they tracked the enemies down, attacking immediately. And honestly, dogs were one of the most useful combat advances aside from grenades they had come up with. But when Lev became Mel and Owen's friend, as much as he became Abby's friend, they tried to show him that the dogs weren't just murderous animals. Alice, the German shepherd Mel was treasuring a lot, was laying there, stabbed to death.

"Yea." - Abby said simply, walking to the dog. Someone else was in the aquarium. Lev saw the act of Abby kneeling down to the dog as a goodbye ceremony. But this wasn't the situation in which Abby was showing her grief for the animal. Gently, she pulled her palm down under the dog's fur to feel the warmth of the body. To feel it a bit better, she closed her eyes, realizing that the body is almost cold. Whoever had infiltrated the aquarium was there a long time ago.

And given the dog was most likely stabbed to avoid attracting the attention of Mel and Owen, these two were in danger too. Abby gulped with her mouth dry, realizing that maybe, they arrived into the aquarium too late. Quietly, Abby tiptoed to the surgeon room, watching if the room is safe to enter before walking in to find herself some weapon. - "You stay behind me, okay?" - Abby looked the boy into his eyes, having a serious expression on her face.

"I want to help." - Lev rebelled against Abby's demand, but the woman just rolled her eyes. - "You will keep the watch over the perimeter with your bow. You see something we don't know, you hold them at gunpoint, you shoot, okay?" - Abby put her palm on the boy's shoulder, smoothing it. Yeah, he was good with a bow, and plus, she felt that he'll be safer behind her back. Nothing would get to Lev without it going through her first. With that, Lev felt some sort of usefulness, calming down.

Both of them took a second to adjust to the surroundings, peaking both their senses, preparing for whoever is awaiting them deeper inside the aquarium. When they felt ready, they moved to other rooms - they slowly searched every room. They walked through the improvised bedroom, the bathroom, some supply cabinets before they were about to enter the big room with a whale hanging from the ceiling. An iron, watery stench hit Abby's nose. It was a smell she knew perfectly - the cold smell of blood.

For a moment, she couldn't find the source. And she barely had the time to find it - because another human sped up against her, trying to take her down. Abby almost tried to stab the woman but stopped herself when she realized the woman's pregnant. The woman was Melanie. Mel who was pretty obviously freaked out. Abby stepped aside from the crying woman and pointed her palm towards Lev, letting him know that it's okay and that he should put his bow down.

One quick glance over was all to give Abby a bad gut feeling. Melanie was there, freaked out, tired out because of the hysteric crying. The gut feeling was telling Abby that she knows exactly from whom the blood stench is coming from. Yet at the moment, she had to deal with hysteric Melanie.

"It's me, hey, I'm here." - Abby tried to fidgeting, significantly smaller woman. But Melanie pushed her off while pointing her finger at Abby.

"Who the fuck you think you are?" - Melanie asked with her voice raspy from the crying, her widened eyes going from Lev to Abby and the other way around. - "This is on you, on both of you." - Mel straightened up. Abby didn't have any idea about what Melanie was talking about, but she straightened up, reminding the woman of her height.

"Every fucking time I hear 'Abby has a problem', I know it is going to bite me in my ass. And guess what, Abigail. This time, it bit everyone in the ass. Manny's dead, Nora's dead, Leah's dead, Whitney was murdered... And I can continue." - Melanie walked in a small circle, entwining her fingers in her short hair. - "Or did you get my point? Huh?" - Again, Mel pushed Abby. This time, she pushed her so hard, that Abby slipped and fell down.

"I don't know what you're talking about..." - "The whole fucking Jackson trip. That's what I'm talking about." - Melanie took in a deep breath. Lev had sat down a bit far away from them, just listening to their fight. On Abby's body language, there could be seen that her throat had clinched a bit. Jackson? How would all of this tie to Jackson? And... How could she fucking know that all of these people were killed? Sure, these people were in Jackson, but also could be just a coincidence. These people could be in a bad place at a bad time. That was all. The whole mystery.

"You were so focused on yourself that you ignored everything that was going on, weren't you? Am I even surprised?" - "Can you just fucking tell me what you're on about?" - Abby fired back, prooving Mel's point perfectly. She didn't even know that all of their friends were getting killed, she didn't know what was happening with her own fucking people. Funny. - "The girl from Jackson is here, taking out every last one of us. It's like waiting for her to check your name on the list while she stands above your corpse. And... And guess what, Abby, she's after you. And she isn't alone." - Melanie giggled. It wasn't an amused giggle. It was a sound full of despair and fear, it was a borderline cry for help.

"Why are you alive then? She's here for me, not for all the others. Maybe... Maybe she wasn't the one who killed the rest. Because you're alive, so..." - Just when Mel looked into her eyes, Abby connected the two dots. You spared Melanie's life because you took another one. At that, Abby's lungs stopped to work. She was gasping for air, turning on her side, when she saw the view hidden behind the table. She couldn't see Owen, she could see gallons of blood on the ground.

"And how do I know? She told me. She looked me dead in the eyes and told me she's here for you. And this, my dear, I think is your last stop. Because there are at least three people somewhere out there in Seattle, looking for you. And one of them is your man, Joel fucking Miller." - Melanie grinned and threw the map to Abby's legs. - "I took you a little souvenir so you can finish your suicidal mission once and for all. I'll take Lev with me and we're leaving. And you're... You're not welcomed." - Melanie hissed, looking at the boy. Abby was falling deeper and deeper into the initial shock, realizing that indeed, every word Melanie had said was true.

This was her fault. Everything was her fault. Which was pretty ironic, given the circumstances leading to this moment. Just an hour ago, Abby allowed herself to let the thing go. After four years of the rage eating her alive, she, for the first time, saw the hope around her. There was Lev for whom she wanted to do better than she was doing up to that point. Abby needed to be better for the new family she found. Just for this to happen, bringing the whole family dynamic to the ground. Joel Miller, once again, was the source of her problems.

"Mel, no, please." - Lev picked himself up, trying to plead for her taking Abby with them. But the more Abby watched the blood, the more she realized this wasn't a thing she could let go. It would find her anywhere. It would haunt her down any time. Melanie shook her head, telling Lev what she wanted to without words. - "Then I'm going with her." - Lev said and backed to Abby, who was still panicking and laying on the floor.

"You'll get yourself killed, kid. You're not going anywhere. End of the story." - Melanie told the boy and left to the upper quarters, slowly smoothing her belly. Lev was still standing there, watching as Abigail picker herself up, walking to the dead body. Shivers were running up her spine and cold sweat slowly leaked down her back. First, she saw the dried footprints in the blood and the pipe which was covered in not only blood but in the rest of what seemed to be Owen's brain. Trying to brace yourself for what she was about to see was dumb. At the moment she saw what that Jackson girl had done to him, Abby just threw up on the ground next to him. It was more or less only water, but there were things coming out of her. Melanie was right. This was all Abby's doing.

"That fucking bitch." - She muttered out, sitting on the other side, looking at the dead body. When they've captured you, you were sure one of the toughest nuts to crack. But if she'd suspect someone coming after her, it would be the Tommy man who they captured alongside you. Which happened. The Tommy man shot Manny in his face. But you? Such a fragile, scared girl? No. Abby would never suspect you'd be able to do such bullshit. She wouldn't ever think that there was a scenario in which you'd track her down, killing her friends one by one until you'd bump into her.

"Do you... Do you want to follow her?" - Lev asked silently, sitting next to her on the ground. It wasn't close enough to disrupt her personal space, but close enough to reassure her that he's there. Next to her, ready to go after the people he didn't know, fighting for a cause that didn't include him at all. Now, she was his people. In fact, she was everything that Lev was left with. And if Mel thought he'd leave Abby behind just like that, she was naïve, to say the least.

"This has nothing to do with you, kid." - "She, whoever she is, killed one of my friends. Now, it has something to do with me. I'm a part of this now." - Lev told Abby back with his head clear. This one kid was courageous. And ready for another battle. Of which Abby was hella sure. But even if she chuckled, looking down on her palms, she didn't want the kid to come. - "Listen. This... This is very personal to me. This is something that drags for the last couple of years. And it involves me, my family and something terrible. The only one who can put end to all of this is me. And I won't let you drag yourself into shit that doesn't involve you. I want you safe." - "Abby..." - "It makes me strong. You're my people now. Even Mel is... And I need to keep you both safe." - Abby whispered with tears of anger in her eyes, catching Lev's hand to hold it for a moment. She didn't know that Mel was standing above them, listening to every word that was said.

No matter what happened in the aquarium, no matter what the relationship she had with Abby and what she thought about her... This was everyone's cause now. Most importantly, you didn't seem to be the type to leave the things behind. Sure, now, you felt something resembling a closure after killing Owen. But how much time would pass before you'd feel the need to find Abby again? To find Mel and her baby? The time would come.

For that, it would be better to track you down when they had the chance, ending all of this for good. And even if Melanie hated Abby with everything she got now... Abby was right. Melanie was now her people - just like Abby was hers. No matter how she'd try to fight it, Mel didn't want to see the woman get killed because of the heat regarding Abby's stupidity. It didn't feel right to send Abby on a suicidal mission. This needed closure. Plus, honestly, Melanie needed Abby around once the baby would be born. She, the baby, and Lev needed a guardian. A literal watchdog.

"She's out of her mind." - Mel said silently, making both the people sitting on the ground looking up to her, standing in front of the quarters. - "I don't know what the girl was through, but she was off. It was like a blackout or something. She's dangerous. I'm terrified of her." - Mel said honestly, walking the stairs down. - "Can you go up and pack some things for me?" - Melanie smiled at Lev. Abby looked at the boy, sending him off upstairs. - "And you, come here. I don't wanna look at the..." - Melanie breathed out, still being shaken by what happened.

Mel wasn't over it at all, not a fucking chance. Her partner was brutally murdered. And she witnessed every second of it. Every. Fucking. Second. Yet... This world didn't offer them enough time to seek closure within themself, it didn't give them the time to grieve properly. Not until everything was said and done. Abby nodded at the pregnant woman's request, picking herself up from the ground.

"Listen." - Mel said quietly while leading Abby through the aquarium's interior. - "You're a fucking selfish asshole and dear Lord, I just want to punch you sometimes. And what happened between you and Owen at the boat last night peaked all of those feelings. But... How do you say it? Even if I didn't choose it voluntarily, you're now my people. That's something I have to deal with and it will take months, maybe years. But the fact is that I need you because I cant take care of myself out there once the baby will be born. This concludes in a fact - I can't let you get yourself killed while going after these people." - She stopped, looking Abby in the eyes. And with an expression showing gratefulness, Abby smiled back at her. - "We're not friends, at least not for now. Not a fucking a chance. But we're coming after them together because I'm scared of them coming back for us." - Melanie whispered. And without anything foreshadowing it, Abby hugged her, finally starting to cry into Mel's clothes.

There was too much pressure for Abby to handle - you and your people, Owen's death, Yara's murder, the whole conflict at the island proving to her as a bunch fo brainwashing lies which Isaac spoonfeed each of them, resolving in everyone's death. Melanie's cold honestly was something Abby needed bad. Melanie didn't like her, not at that point, and she was straightforward about it. At least someone was honest with Abby the whole fucking time.

"They will pay. Every last one of them. I swear." - Abby let Melanie go, carefully maneuvering her palms around Melanie's belly. - "That's the spirit." - Melanie grinned back. This was noticeably out of Mel's character. Abby honestly never seen her wishing death upon anyone except the Scars - which was excusable because the foundation in that behavior was based on Isaac's brainwashing program. Now, she was willingly after someone else, who was just a part of Abby's fuckery. Yet as Lev told Abby, this was now Melanie's cause too. The woman had the right to feel outraged towards the Jacksoners at that point. They killed her baby daddy.

No-one was left behind. Abby, after observing the map, knew the theatre which was marked as the 'hideout'. She knew precisely where the location was. Each of them set on the way during a stormy night, clothed up to stay warm against the stormy weather. Their way through the city was quick because no-one was really there. Everyone was on the island, fighting the dispute they've been told that is the main center of their existence. When Abby or Mel didn't know where to go, Lev showed them the safest way and otherwise. They kept an eye for each other and Mel was helped a lot, so they'd be sure that nothing happens to her or the baby.

It was two hours from the moment they've left the aquarium when Abby saw the theatre in the distance. It was lit up, so someone was definitely out there. The feeling she carried in her chest was fucking heavy. So fucking heavy. She wanted to shoot each of you dead, but on the other hand, she knew this could go extremely bad. Melanie was pregnant and Lev was just a fucking kid. And for a reason, now she found out there are reasons to be happy for even if she didn't murder Joel, it felt foolish to come there to kill you. It was too much of a risk. On the other hand, she promised Mel that she'd see you suffer for what you've done. There was no point in stopping.

"Now, we have to find our way inside." - Mel noted quietly upon arriving to the building. They've just tried the main door, gently, to find out if it was blocked. Of course, it was. You weren't that dumb. - "I think I have something." - Lev looked at both of them, waving at them. It was an escape staircase. That kid had eyes of the falcon because to spot it in the darkness was kind of amazing.

It was the final moment before the big climax Abby had dreamed of for so long. And she almost had to laugh at the pathetic thoughts she had. She was afraid to enter the building. Who knew what waited for them inside? Will any of them walk out of the building alive? Will any of these three people survive? Or will all of the Jacksoners be killed in bloodshed? Well, there was only one way to find out. And with that, Abby opened the window which was pre-opened by a bright yellow cable leading onto the rooftop. And so, she stepped on her final journey towards the presumed saving of her damned soul.

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likefromtheoffice · 4 years

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What I Had To Do - TLoUII SPOILERS

I started feeling compelled to write a deep reflection on The Last of Us Part II when it became clear I was going to be playing as Abby for quite some time. Like everyone else, I imagine, I had made up my mind about Abby almost immediately. She would die, and I would be the one to do it. I didn’t want to play as Abby, I wanted to not move the controller and just have her die. But the game makes the choices here.

Of course, knowing Naughty Dog and expecting the level of quality I did from this game, there was certainly a reason we were slated to spend so much time with her. While I ultimately came to respect this choice, it was plain to see that the game was going to attempt to change our minds about Abby, to show us how she came to be the person she is and how she was driven to do the things she had done. For this reason, I was not engaged in Abby’s story. Because, like I said, I’d already made up my mind.

The brilliantly-handled revelation of her father being the surgeon the player is forced to kill in the first game was enough to fully humanize this woman who, in the space after she kills Joel up until she is hoisted in the Seraphite noose is surely the most viciously despised character on Playstation. Even though I kept the difficulty low in order to breeze through her portion of the story, I admittedly did eat my words: “If they can change my mind about Abby, I’ll be shocked.” My mind was changed just about as much as Abby’s heart changed throughout her ~10 hours of game time. She ends up doing almost exactly what Joel does for Ellie for a very similar reason, although Lev’s brain can’t save the world.

When I found Abby at the Pillars, I had already decided that if the game were to give me the option to press Square to kill Abby or circle to let her live, I’d smash the circle button. When Ellie says “I can’t let you leave,” I thought to myself, “yes, let’s actually do let her leave, but we probably should fuck her up a little bit, right?” Fuck her up we did, but of course the game isn’t base enough to trivialize the story it’s told over 20+ hours by letting you funnel out all your rage with a button press, completely destroying Ellie’s and Lev’s lives with a single click.

So ultimately, Abby’s segment shows us a lot about the world we’re living in inside this game, and the metaphor of warring clans with their own agendas and perspectives very directly reflects the distilled personal motivations behind Abby’s and Ellie’s actions. I said a hundred times that Abby’s section was too long, and I think I’d drastically shorten the first act. I don’t think we needed to stroll through the base and see kids taking classes in an attempt to humanize and raise the stakes for her. When we’re forced to play as her, we are not interested in what is happening. You could start with information about Owen and the coming attack on the Island. A lot of Abby’s section felt like Druckmann knowing that we need more hours for $60. But this may have been because until Lev’s mother dies in her cabin, I still wanted to watch her die.

This is where it all changed for me, except for the feeling that her segment was still too long. One thing this segment does perfectly and to hopefully great and continued effect, is to show us--more than the game already has--that LGBTQI+ stories are now a part of our human experience, and these people will be in the stories we tell. And it won’t be a fucking big deal. “Do you want me to ask about it?” “No.”

I was able to stay almost entirely blind to the promotional materials for Part II. When I started the game at 11pm CST, I knew only that there was a guitar, there was a fight in a shopping area, and there was a real bad person cutting a hanging guy’s stomach open. I was also able to avoid anyone’s conjecture about the game, but in seeking the opinions of others after I’d completed it, I’ve discovered the bizarre criticisms about the narrative. Namely, being forced to play as Abby for so long and having “social issues” shoved in their face when they’re “just trying to play the game.” I had a problem with the Abby segment even after I began to see its purpose, but eventually it cracked me open in the way it intended. In making me do the things she’d done, I was of course forced to fully realize her perspective from the moment we’re put over her shoulder instead. But the latter issue is what bothers me to no end, and it’s upsetting that we’re still here as gamers.

If someone has a problem with Ellie’s sexuality or coming of age, Dina’s sexuality, Lev’s gender identity, or the fact that all our main characters are women, then the only hope I have for that player is that they might see themselves in Seth. Seth is the physically oldest character we see in the game, and he is the only character who has any problem with what he’s seeing. He’s alone in his bigotry and he is weak. He will die very soon and he will do nothing meaningful before then, aside from being forced to make free steak sandwiches for those he has hurt by those who are in power and do not take his side. If this hypothetical--although very real--player fails to make this revelation and turn this corner, if that person still disapproves of the story being told, my question to them would be: “did you accidentally buy this when you meant to download Call of Duty: Warzone?” If you’re not playing the game for the story, you should just play a game where you’re always shooting things. If you are playing the game for the story and you have a problem with the story, also fuck off to Call of Duty. I use Call of Duty here because it’s mainstream and not objectionable and you are holding the trigger through most of the game where the story doesn’t matter if you don’t want it to, not because I have a problem with its playerbase or the games themselves.

The dissent I still cling to is that it’s difficult to ratchet intensity upward and keep motivation high when you know the character has to survive because you’ve seen a future piece of the story--especially when you don’t want them to survive. This was most sharply upsetting when I was still playing as Abby after she shoots Jesse and Tommy in their heads. I felt like tossing the controller and quitting. The only reason I can think of for this choice is that the trope of unwinnable fights in games exposes the guts therein. For me, though, this exposed them even more. I would rather have tried very hard to kill Abby and then have her overpower me with those cannon arms and watch the devastating Dina scene play out. It’s what I wanted just then, and was undoubtedly what Ellie wanted. This would have aligned me more with her, the character who I would still side with instantly and unquestionably. It was so strange to fight Ellie’s AI, particularly because the computer does not play her like I do, and for the only portion in the entire game, she was not human. I understand what this rigid perspective attempts to illustrate, but the choice still puzzles me greatly.

While I am still able to see why the game did it and why it was necessary, there was no way I was ever going to care about the Jackson Crew. This made playing with Manny and Mel very frustrating. Owen’s meta-perspective philosophizing about how none of the clans are actually any different from each other was interesting, but it was not touched on for very long, and now seems to only have been there to benefit Abby’s journey toward her own perspective-altering events. I see this as the only other true failing of the game, although I don’t have any idea how it could’ve been done differently. Aside from being shorter.

The reason everyone hates playing as Abby is because very few narratives have ever fully explored the other side of a conflict, and for us to be forced to see that, to play as The Bad Guy for so long, is something we’re absolutely going to hate for a long time. It does, or it should if you’re paying attention, eventually do exactly what it’s supposed to do. When Abby becomes human, we can then say that we’ve experienced the story up to that point. We are almost never shown this, much less forced to do it.

Another thing I’m stuck on but can’t suss out is the theme of pregnancy and innocence. Of course, an unborn baby is completely innocent even in an overgrown hellscape. Where this is most effectively employed is when the knife is at Dina’s throat. “Good.” Maybe the most terrifying line in the whole pair of games. It shows us the depth of hatred these women have fallen to, and how, like the player controlling Joel or Ellie or Abby in parts I and II, when we have to survive, it doesn’t matter what’s going on in anyone else’s life. If we feel someone has wronged us, we take everything from them and don’t consider the consequences. This game does show us our own actions very plainly, and the ultimate consequence could not have been more beautifully shown than in the final chronological scene in Part II. In following her own anger--combined with Tommy’s--she has damaged her connection to the very reason she followed it. She cannot play the song she shared with Joel without wounds appearing in the music itself.

Ultimately, the story told here is about violence. Why, how, and when it is employed, the unexpected casualties thereof, and how it changes the world for everyone connected to it. Love, hate, survival, revenge, and so many more. Joel protecting Ellie ended a lot of lives--starting as duty and perverting into misguided redemption and love. Abby avenging her father ended a lot of lives--starting as revenge and ending as duty and love. The cyclical implication is very clear as we come to blows between the two rowboats, although it is--like many other gigantic story moments--masterfully left un-hinted-at. If Ellie were to have held Abby under the water for a minute more and Lev were to survive somehow, we’d have ourselves a Part III for almost the same reason which started us down the troubling path of Part II. Can you imagine Ellie looking into the boat at a broken and unconscious Lev? Would she have felt something similar to looking over the bars of JJ’s crib?

What a lot of games don’t bother to explore is what violence takes away from those who employ it, no matter the reason for their doing so. When Ellie walks away from the farmhouse where her family used to live, leaving the last object connecting her to Joel there at the window, I was devastated, as I’m sure we all were and as I’m sure the storytellers intended. Through the deeply troubled feeling Naughty Dog left me with, I was searching for meaning, like Ellie was after seeing those giraffes: “After all we’ve been through. Everything that I’ve done. It can’t be for nothing.” What was it for? It seemed like it was going to be difficult to determine when the credits started to roll, but when it appeared to me, I was embarrassed it had taken me so long to figure out. Everyone was led to their devastating conclusion by the same driving force: love.

There’s also been a fair bit of talk about how bleak the outcome is, and how hopeless everything seems. This observation comes down to how deeply we’re hit by Abby’s boat disappearing into the fog as we sit entirely alone, physically and emotionally less than we’ve been so far, and how the ending and outlook of the whole game isn’t really what we want right now because our world doesn’t need a lot of help in the bleak category. Of course we want everything to work out, and we are so used to video games giving us what we want. Tragedy doesn’t cater to the wants of the audience, and the weight of this tragedy is gargantuan. What a knee jerk dismissal of the story would rob you of is the incredible contrast. I finished the game eight days ago and I’ve probably watched the dance scene at least once per day since. How gorgeous. “Oh, Ellie…” says Dina. To feel this moment fully, knowing its the beginning of a beautiful thing that can’t last, is a gift rarely given to any audience or player. It does so much so deeply in 3.5 minutes. That scene in itself shows us that this isn’t what we’re used to, and the bit of Joel and Ellie’s interaction we get in that scene also demonstrates that the things we care most about are not okay right now. We were Joel more than Ellie in the first game and we protected her. We saved her. We want to continue to protect her.

But the decisions Joel made in the hospital guaranteed things would never be okay. What is it that these folks want from the ending? “You killed Abby! Congratulations! Ellie went on to found Joel Miller Memorial Research Center, where a cure was eventually reverse-engineered from a culture of bacteria extracted from Ellie’s intestine. Dina eventually forgave Ellie, and invited her to live with her and JJ inside the walls of Jackson where they dance, free from hatred and despair, every Thursday night.”

It’s hyperbolic, sure, but what a fucking waste that would be. What we have instead is a seemingly insurmountable sorrow which wraps around a glowing core of warmth and beauty which we’ve seen firsthand throughout both games, begging us to discuss and reflect and analyze and feel. Is the ending really entirely hopeless if Ellie puts down and leaves behind the guitar which attached her to Joel? I don’t know if she’s wearing or still has the watch, I’d have to see the cutscenes again. But she’s walking away from it, finally. What could she be walking toward?

Finally, there is one piece of storytelling after the credits, not a cutscene or a piece of text. The iconic title screen rowboat which we assume Ellie rides away in is replaced with its twin, dragged up onto the shore near Abby & Lev’s beached fishing boat. I’m having trouble putting what I believe this means into words that don’t sound too disgustingly sunny, but if Abby and Ellie, these two veritable destroyers are now free from the searing chains of revenge, and we’ve seen their allegiances shift and their hearts fundamentally changed, imagining the good they’re capable of isn’t too terribly difficult a task. That’s disgustingly sunny to even type out, but I believe it’s supported. It’s very clear that at this point, both parties deserve and have earned peace, inside and out.

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animeficlets · 5 years

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Fate Mini Story: The Battle of Chaldea’s Kitchen

Mash adjusted her glasses as she stood nervously outside her senpai's room. Ever since they had gotten back from the last singularity, the last master of humanity had been hard at work studying to be a better Master with the materials the late director had left behind. He had been studying for a good few hours and his reliable kouhai decided to pay him a visit.

He was probably hungry, and she had made him some sandwiches which she had wrapped up and was currently holding them behind her back, nervously looking at the door to Ritsuka’s bedroom. She usually just walked in without even thinking about it, but for some reason she found herself feeling nervous. What if Senpai didn’t like her sandwiches or what if she was just bugging him by entering the room while he was hard at work?

While Mash fretted over whether to enter or not, the beloved mascot of Chaldea saw no reason to hesitate and jumped from Mash’s shoulder, pressing the button to open the door before launching himself back onto her head. The door slid open almost silently, but it caught the attention of her senpai, who turned and smiled weakly at her. There were bags under his eyes and the desk next to his bed were littered with screwed up bits of paper.

“Hey,” He laughed weakly. “Is everything okay? Did Da Vinci and Dr Roman sort out access to the next singularity?”

“No Senpai,” Mash shook her head and stepped into the room, smiling softly. “I just figured I would check on you. You’ve been locked in here for a few hours.”

“Oh right,” Ritsuka rubbed the back of his head. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to worry you… it’s just…” He closed his eyes and a familiar vision assaulted his mind.

A teary-eyed Olga Marie reached out to him as she was pulled towards her doom. Her eyes begged him to save her but no matter how quickly he ran, it wasn’t fast enough.

“No-No, No! Someone help me! Help! I…I don’t want to die here!” Tears trailing down her face, “Because I’ve never been praised… I’ve never been praised by anyone! Why does this always happen to me?!” She howled in sorrow and rage, “No one ever valued me! Everyone hated me!” She was suddenly ripped off of her feet, dragged towards the burning sphere of Chaldeas, “No! Stop! No, no, no, no, no… I haven’t accomplished anything yet! From the moment I was born, I’ve never been accepted by anyone!”

“DIRECTOR!” Ritsuka cried out as she was drawn into the fiery orb the signified the disintegration of all humanity.

“No, don’t do it Senpai!” Mash grabbed him and pulled him away from Lev, “If you approach that man, you’ll die the same way!”

Ritsuka opened his eyes to see Mash’s face barely inches away from his own, “Are you alright Senpai?”

“Gargh,” He cried out in alarm and stumbled backwards, “Ah sorry. Just thinking about the director. Maybe if I’d put in the effort before hand I could have changed something.” He glanced at the books on his desk, “But it seems I have little aptitude for book learning.”

“Maybe you need a break from studying,” Mash suggested.

“I…” Before Ritsuka could say anything else, his stomach rumbled, and a crimson blush coloured his cheeks. “Hah… I guess a little break wouldn’t hurt.”

Before Mash could present the sandwiches, the door to the room swung open and a bright, red haired woman charged in.

“Sounds like someone needs a meal!” Boudicca, the British Heroic Rider Servant, declared as she marched over to Ritsuka. “Just leave it to your big sister Boudica! I’ll whip you up some good old fashion British cuisine!”

“I’m not that hungry…” Ritsuka weakly protested but the Rider was having none of it.

“Nonsense! You’ve been locked away for too long. You are able to supply magical energy to all of us servants, so it is only fair we help you maintain yours. Besides you are looking awfully pale. Leave it Onee-san, you need lots of meat!”

Mash watched her senpai get dragged away before glancing at the door. ‘Wasn’t it a slide door. I’ll have to get some of the staff to repair it.’ Letting out a soft sigh she put down the bundle of sandwiches and picked up the damaged door, leaning it against the wall before hurrying after her master and the ‘big sister’ servant. When she arrived at Chaldea’s canteen she saw an exasperated looking Ritsuka stood between a pouting Raikou and Boudicca.

“He needs meat!” Boudicca pointed out.

“Mother knows best and I saw he needs a light Japanese meal. Not your uncultured British slop.” Raikou grabbed Ritsuka hugging him tightly against her impressive chest.

“Look at him! His iron levels must be really low,” Boudicca snatched her master back from the Japanese heroic spirit, who tried to grab him back.

“W-wait! You are hurting senpai!” Mash quickly ran over and disentangled Ritsuka who offered her a genuine smile as thanks. “Isn’t there a better way to solve this? Maybe if you ask senpai if he’d prefer a big meaty meal, a light Japanese meal or even just some sandwiches you wouldn’t have to fight.”

“Honestly, the sandwiches sound pretty good,” Ritsuka admitted and Mash suddenly felt happy, before remembering she’d left the sandwiches in his room and cursing herself.

“Nonsense,” Raikou smiled, “He is only saying that to protect that servant’s feelings. How could a British spirit cook a meal worth eating?”

“Better than your slimline Japanese meals. No wonder prior to the end of humanity you had a declining birth rate. How is anyone supposed to have the energy to make babies if all you eat is rice and vegetables with the occasional bit of fish? Besides he’d probably have to have someone taste test your food to make sure you didn’t try and poison him just, so you could nurture him back to health”

“Japanese cuisine is much more that just rice, vegetables and fish,” The Japanese berserker spirit smiled with her mouth only. “And I would never poison my beloved Master, which is more that can be said for your cooking.”

“It is obvious there is only one way to solve this!” A proud voice declared, and the assembled servants and master turned to see another British Servant, Saber Artoria.

“It’s time like these you truly feel her Rank B Charisma,” Mash whispered and Ritsuka couldn’t help but nod in agreement. She radiated an aura that made you want to bow your head and follow her to the end.

Satisfied that she had everyone’s attention, she pointed to the two bickering servants. “There should be a competition!”

“Competition?” Came the confused reply.

“Indeed. What better what to settle a rivalry such as this than to prove once and for all who is the greater chef! Of course, in order to ensure an accurate judging, I shall offer my talents as a judge!”

‘So, she just wants to eat a lot of different food…’ Mash and Ritsuka thought in sync with a sigh.

“Very well!” Boudicca nodded. “I shall show you why I am known as a Heroic Spirit of Victory!”

“Wasn’t Boudicca defeated by Nero’s army?” Ritsuka whispered to Mash who nodded.

“She was the one who came closest to forcing Nero to abandon Britain but ultimately failed.” Mash confirmed under her breath so as not to agitate the fired-up servant.

There was a sudden discharge of magical energy and everyone froze.

“Senpai look out! Someone is using their noble phantasm!” Mash pushed the last master of humanity to the floor, shielding him with her body.

"I am the Bone of my Knife

Steel is my Body and Fire is my Oven,

I have created over a Thousand Spatulas,

Slayer of Hunger,

Prolonger of Life.

Have withstood Pain to create many Dishes

Yet those lips will never taste anything.

So, as I Pray--

Unlimited Kitchen Works"

Archer Emiya intoned as he entered the canteen, various tools appearing around the canteen as he adjusted his apron. “If there is to be a competition of cooking, then let it be known that I have some pride in my abilities.”

“I approve!” The King of the Britons declared. “In fact, we should invite all who wish to prove themselves!”

“You really don’t have to go to this length,” Ritsuka laughed weakly as he stood up, Mash helping him with a sheepish expression. “Just a small snack would be fine and I really need to focus on my studies so…”

“Fool!” Artoria slammed her fist on a table, causing her Master to leap in surprise. “It is your duty as a Master to allow your Servants to better themselves by competing! As a king I had to hold tournaments to allow my knights to prove themselves. Did I want to see them hitting each other and getting hurt? No! Although in hindsight I should have had Sir Mordred face Sir Lancelot more often, seeing that traitorous knight humbled would be satisfying for me now. But I digress! It is your duty, nay your obligation to allow your servants to compete is such an event! There will be starters, main courses and plenty of deserts!”

“Your true motives are showing,” Mash rubbed the back of her head.

“Do you understand?!” Artoria stood up and Ritsuka couldn’t help but kneel. “Even if you cannot eat it yourself, it is your duty to suffer hardships for the sake of your servants, just as they do for you!”

“Yes, your majesty!” Ritsuka replied, “I shall fulfil my obligations as a Master!”

“Good!” Artoria returned to her seat. “Now summon the servants for my extravagant fea… I mean the competition!”

Sometime later

The cafeteria was a hive of activity as Artoria, Ritsuka and Mash walked amongst the many servants who had decided to join in the competition. All early pretences had been dropped and Artoria was happily going from contestant to contestant, sampling meals and sighing happily. For the most part all the competitors had served food with nothing strange about it, but there were a few exceptions.

“Please Master, have a bite~” Kiyohime smiled as she offered a spoon to Ritsuka. “This rice was lovingly cooked using the flames of passion you inspire within me.”

“Its smells a little strange.” Ritsuka paused. “You didn’t put anything in this?”

“Oh, just a little secret ingredient~ My own patented love sauce.”

“Love sauce? What is…” Ritsuka was cut off by Mash pushing him to the next stall.

“I think it is better not to ask that, especially considering as Saber-san has already eaten two bowls of it.”

“Hm?” Artoria looked thoughtful. “It had a strange taste to it that I couldn’t quite place. Still a respectable effort.” She nodded sagely as they approached the next table where a downcast servant was waiting for them.

“Ah… Sorry master…” Hassan of Serenity looked at the floor. “Everything I touch… turns to poison. I should never have tried to join this competition.”

“Serenity…” Ritsuka steeled his stomach, ‘It is the duty of a master to suffer hardships for his servants!’ He recalled Artoria’s earlier words picked up a dish containing a middle eastern meal that was rendered unrecognisable by Serenity’s toxic touch. He wolfed it down and turned to the teary-eyed servant. “D-Delicious…” He tried to ignore the sensation that his internal organs were fusing into a single mass of pain, instead focusing on the look of happiness on the Assassin’s face, completely oblivious to Cursed Arm and Hundred Faces watching him warily from the shadows, a stomach pumping kit ready for use at a moment’s notice.

While Ritsuka struggled to walk with Mash’s help, Artoria had already visited several of the competitors and had come to a stop, glaring at the next stop on her gluttonous tour.

“What is this?” Artoria scowled as she beheld a large steel container full of boiling water and various meat and veg.

“It’s a stew father,” Mordred smirked. “I might be a third-rate knight but even I know how to make a decent meal! Feel free to try and it and see for yourself!” ‘Hah! Father loves food. Let’s see him try this and not praise me!’

“I have no desire to eat food from a traitor. It is probably more poisoned than Serenity’s cooking anyway.” Artoria moved on leaving a shell-shocked Mordred.

“W-Well maybe I didn’t want you to eat it anyway! Jackass! Moron!” Mordred crossed his arms and looked away. “Stupid father…”

“Don’t lose hope,” Mash smiled softly at Mordred whilst Ritsuka patted him on the shoulder.

“I don’t get why you’re both looking at me like that but it’s pissing me off,” The Knight of Treachery scoffed and looked away, a hint of an embarrassed blush on his face.

Somewhat recovered, Ritsuka and Mash found themselves at one of the initial contestant’s tables. Raikou smiled sweetly at him and offered him a small tray of dango.

“I originally had the idea to cook you a full meal, but I wouldn’t want to put you to too much trouble. Eating all this food is not good for you.” Raikou mothered Ritsuka, who was in no state to resist her but fortunately there was a sudden clamour and Mash pulled him away, stating that two servants were butting heads and he should intervene.

When they caught up with Artoria they saw her trying to push an irate Ibaraki Douji, whose cheeks had swollen up like a hamster’s, away from Archer Emiya’s table.

“Foul demon, begone will you! I am the judge here and I should taste these sweats!” Artoria declared.

“Foolish human!” Ibaraki yelled after snatching the last of the cake. “I am an Oni and I take what I want! All the sweets are mine!” She cackled arrogantly. “No-one can stop me!”

“Why don’t you take these dumplings and let Artoria-san have some of Archer’s deserts?” Ritsuka offered the dumplings to the Oni, who snatched them up gleefully.

“I accept this meagre offering human!” Ibaraki declared proudly. “But shall not relinquish my grasp on such fine sweets!” She stuffed a whole stick of dango in her mouth then used the skewer to steal some more of Archer’s sweet treats.

“Isn’t that Master’s dango you have there?! Did you steal it from him?” Artoria declared in a loud voice, drawing the attention of a certain motherly berserker.

“What? This is mine! I was given it fair and…” Ibaraki froze up as she felt an unholy amount of killing intent and turned to face a scarily blank faced Raikou.

“What was that, golden insect?” Her voice carried threats of unimaginable pain, and all the small Oni’s courage evaporated as she decided to seek refuge elsewhere. “Why are you eating the dango I made for Master?”

“W—Whaa!” Ibaraki took off in a yellow blur. “Shuten! Shuten! They’re picking on me!”

“Get back here you insect!” Raikou charged after the fleeing Oni, leaving her own stall unguarded and allowing the King of Britons to claim its contents without much competition.

“That was sort of childish don’t you think,” Mash sighed as a smug Artoria helped herself to some of Archer Emiya’s cooking to go with her recently acquired plunder.

“It was a grand strategy as befits the King of Knights!” Artoria declared.

An hour or so later

“I can’t eat another bite…” Ritsuka groaned, wincing as he turned to face Artoria who had just finished off another plate of Tamamo Cat’s cooking.

“Such are the trials of leadership,” Artoria nodded sagely, before reaching for another plate of food. “Still to think that I would be able to taste such a wide variety of food. Being summoned to Chaldea was definitely worth it.”

“Where do you put it all?” Ritsuka wondered aloud before sighing loudly. “Have you made a decision then?”

“Pardon?” The King of Knights turned to face the young man.

“Whose meal was the best?” Ritsuka prompted, gesturing the gathering army of servants.

“Master…” Artoria laid her hand on his shoulder. “It is your duty as master to choose the victor of this event. All I can do is advise you.”

“And your advice is?”

“They were all wonderful.” Artoria nodded sagely before getting up and leaving, a cheerful spring in her step.

“Ah…” Ritsuka started to sweat nervously as the gathered servants looked at him expectantly. “It was a tie?”

His announcement was met with a general murmur of discontent, but it was quickly decided that by most contestants that they had won, but their Master was just trying to spare the feelings of the other contestants and Ritsuka was able to make a hasty retreat.

Archer Emiya chuckled softly as he watched the scene.

“It is nice to see so many servants working together in harmony.” Artoria commented.

“Hm…” Emiya nodded.

“…For the record I believe you won.” Artoria remarked in an off-hand manner before walking away.

Archer watched her go with a soft smile before heading to clean up the kitchen, humming a tune that reminded him of a past life and what could have been.

Back with Mash and Ritsuka

“I’m sorry Senpai,” Mash bowed her head as they returned to his room. “I didn’t intend for you to spend so much time away from your studies.”

“It’s fine,” Ritsuka laughed. “Besides it was nice to see everyone working so hard at something so minor. It’s not a bad thing to have days like this… Day’s where we aren’t worried about fighting to the death or dying horribly.”

“I was genuinely terrified when you ate Serenity’s meal senpai. Plus, my instincts tell me it was a good thing you didn’t eat Kiyohime’s offerings. Even when it is something like this you come far too close to death for my liking.”

“Don’t worry. I know if I die then that’s it… Humanity is doomed.”

“More than that…” Mash mumbled under her breath, “I don’t know what I would do if something happened to you.”

“Hey, did you leave these?” Ritsuka blinked as he held up a small bundle containing the sandwiches Mash had made earlier.

“Ah… They were for you Senpai, but I guess you’re full now so… Senpai?” Mash blinked as he unwrapped them and took a bite.

“They are delicious, thank you.” Ritsuka smiled. “I think they are the best tasting thing I’ve had all day.”

And as she stood there, her face bright red and a strange feeling in her chest, Mash felt as if all the fighting was worth it, if it led to more moments like this.

“Thank you Senpai!”

#fate grand order #ficlet #Ritsuka Fujimaru #mash kyrielight #minamoto no raikou #artoria pendragon #Boudicca #Emiya Archer #Kiyohime #Ibaraki Douji #Hassan of Serenity #Mordred #Stupid idea I had stuck in my head #Mostly Spoiler free I think #Besides a bit from the prologue #I apologise in advance if the grammar is poor

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otakugirlkrod · 7 years

Text

Three years have passed

A/N: I’m so sorry for the long wait. This chapter is a little short. Also I wanted to say that maybe I made Gajeel a little OOC in this chapter but I don’t know XD. Let me know your thoughts about it. Any like, comment and reblogged is appreciated. P.S. Sorry if I made any mistake on the grammar. I didn’t asked for help in this one, but I hope all of you can understand it.

Anime: Fairy Tail

Couple: Gajevy

Rated: T (Language)

Genres: Romance, Hurt/Comfort

Status: On going

Summary: Tired of being “the damsel in distress”, Levy left the guild without telling anyone except Master Makarov. She spent three years far away from Magnolia learning new spells to improve her skills. But finally, it is time to return home. What’s that strange magic she learned?

Chapter One:https://otakugirlkrod.tumblr.com/post/158442724445/three-years-have-passed

Chapter Two: https://otakugirlkrod.tumblr.com/post/159584893235/three-years-have-passed

Chapter Three: https://otakugirlkrod.tumblr.com/post/159780767225/three-years-have-passed

Chapter Four: https://otakugirlkrod.tumblr.com/post/160171984995/three-years-have-passed

Chapter five: Revealing the truth

Somewhere in Magnolia, hiding behind a bush of a dark forest, Levy rested all her weight on her knees and pressed her chest with both hands.

“This has gone too far. They didn’t deserved to see that. I have to do something about it but I don’t know what.” Levy said frustrated.

Gajeel showed up and leaned down. “There you are. You know you can’t escape from me.” He said touching his nose, indicating his amazing sense.

“Oh Gajeel” Levy hugged him tightly. He place his left arm around her shoulders and the other curled around her waist. Giving her a soothing hug.

He broke away the embrace and slipped his left hand all the way down to hers. “Come here” He hold her hand tightly and turned around “Let’s go home.”

As she walked behind him, Levy looked at his black mane. He makes my fears fade away. She thought and glanced to the ground.

They kept walking all the way down to Gajeel’s house holding each other’s hands.

The guild…what are they thinking about me? Jet, Droy, Lucy…poor Wendy she must be frightened. Levy turned her gaze to their holding hands. I wonder why you came after me.

Fairy Tail guild was astonished. They didn’t know how to react. The bluenette was raised there and what happened made most of them terrified. Some whispers started to invade the whole guild until someone shouted.

“She’s a monster!” Said an angry guildmate.

Lucy followed the source of the voiced and replied: “She’s a human! She’s our friend!”

The new discussion separated some guildmates. The ones who ignored Lucy’s comment keep shouting.

Someone added. “We can’t have someone like her in the guild.”

“Master, she’s a threat!”

Jet couldn’t hear any more of their nonsense. “STOP TALKING SHIT!”

“She’s our comrade.” A teary-eyed Wendy joined.

Natsu stepped forward and looked around. “WE ARE THE ONLY FAMILY SHE HAS AND YOU’RE GONNA TURNED YOUR BACK AT HER!? WHAT KIND OF FRIEND DOES THAT?”

“THAT’S ENOUGH!” Makarov caught the attention of both sides. “Levy has been part of this family since she was a child. She doesn’t deserve to be treated like this. We don’t know exactly what happened, but she will never be a threat.” The master finished his statement and everyone looked down disappointed of their own actions.

Poor Levy. Mirajane thought.

Back to Gajeel and Levy, they finally reached their destination. The silent between them was getting uncomfortable and Gajeel was feeling the weirdness.

Hazel eyes were still looking at Gajeel’s back. The more I looked at him, the more I filled my head with doubts. Why are you helping me so much? Levy thought.

Gajeel stood in front of his home doorknob, opened it, walked in and turned around. He couldn’t take it anymore.

“Stop it.” His rough voice caught her attention.

She looked at him. “Stop whatever you’re thinking. Your aura is getting contagious.”

He released her hand. “We won’t talk about what happened back there. But I think I deserve an explanation of what you did these past three years.”

He sniffed the air and look at the opened door “Lily’s coming”. He turned his gaze back to her and realized that her skin was back to normal.

“Lev, your marks-”

Lily interrupt him. “Levy, the runes are gone.” She looked confused at the small black exceed.

“That’s exactly what I was going to say.” Gajeel growled.

“R-really?” She stuttered in disbelief. Levy looked down at her thighs and confirmed it.

“See, there’s nothing to worry about.” Gajeel crossed his arms in front of his exposed muscular chest.

“At least not for now.” She said worriedly.

Pantherlily felt the tension between the two and decided to leave them alone. “I’m gonna get some sleep. See you tomorrow.”

And with those last words, Levy was left alone with Gajeel.

Levy sat on the couch and Gajeel proceed to follow her.

“Oi, Lev” He looked at her intensely.

“Hmm?” She turned her head to the side and blushed at the closeness of their faces. “G-Gajeel” She blushed.

His gaze was serious, and she knew he was waiting for answers. Levy sighed and started. “I couldn’t take it anymore.” Gajeel looked confused. “All I wanted was to improve my second origin powers.”

“You could have done it here.” He finally said.

“Of course not!” She looked at him fiercely. “The whole guild thinks I’m a weakling. They think of me as someone they HAD to protect and I was tired of it. I wanted to show all of you that I’m a capable mage, someone worthy to be an S class mage.”

She wasn’t answering his doubt and he was getting tired of her excuses. He hold her by the shoulders and looked directly at those hazel eyes. “What did you do?” Her eyes widened. “Why are you capable of using dragon slayer magic?”

“I can’t tel-“ Levy started but he cut her off.

“What’s the fucking mistery?! Just tell me already! What the hell you did?” He tightened his grip.

She complained because of the sudden pressure. “I found it…” Levy replied.

Gajeel loosened his grip. “What?”

She diverted her gaze. “The runes my parents told me on my bed time stories.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Flashback

A beautiful woman with long wavy blue hair lay beside her little daughter in a wooden bed.

“Mama, please tell me that story again.” The little girl hold the sheets.

All of a sudden a handsome man appeared at the doorframe of the little girl’s bedroom.

“So the princess wants to know how her grandma save all the villagers, again?”

The woman smiled at the black haired man. “She never gets tired of it.”

He sat on the edge of the bed and little Levy ran to him and hugged him. “Pleeeeaseee Papa” Levy’s mother giggled. “Okay sweetie, it’s gonna be short because we are a little tired.”

“Yay!” Levy said happily hugging both of her parents.

Her father started. “When the village was being attack by the enemy’s soldiers-” But he was cut off by Levy’s voice.

“I don’t want to hear the bad part. I want you to start from the part when grandma unlocks the greatest spell hidden in the waterfall cave.” She said the last part with excitement.

“Well, well, look who’s anxious.” Levy’s dad laughed but continued. “Grandma used her amazing skills to decode the runes and the strange language that was written in the cave. Once she unlocked it, power overflow in her body. The amazing speed she possessed gave her the advantage to touch all the bad guys, absorbed their black magic and used it against them. Only the villagers were protected by a shield she used to create in a blink of an eye. The enemy’s soldiers that survived the powerful attacked retreat and returned to the battle field in the other side of the town.”

The woman’s voice continued the story. “After being able to defeat the bad guys, grandma returned to the cave and locked the dark magic she consumed. The fight left her exhausted but when she came back to the village, everyone was cheering for her. They hugged her and claimed her as their hero.” Little Levy was intrigued. “ But that’s it for tonight darling.”

“Awww” Levy was a little disappointed that they always cut the final part of the story.

Her mother ruffled Levy’s hair and said:” I bet, when you grow up, you are going to be the one who unlocks it once again and protect the ones you love.”

Levy’s smiled was from ear to ear. “I’m gonna be a hero like grandma!”

“We are sure of it.” Both of her parents said in unison.

“Now go to sleep sweetie.” They gave her a kiss on the forehead and closed the door behind them.

End of Flashback

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Levy continued. “It was all true…the codification, the language and the spell.”

Gajeel was more confused. “What are ya talkin’ about?”

“This magic…” She covered herself in iron scales.

Gajeel released her immediately. He was stunned. “What the-?!”

She turned back to normal as she explained. “It’s some kind of ancient transfer magic, but the user can use the magic they absorbed whenever he/she likes. They can obtained it by just touching the person and putting all the concentration on the connection port.” She raised her hand and showed Gajeel how a little seed grew to a flower in a matter of seconds.

Gajeel looked intensely at the process. “Isn’t that one of your lapdogs magic?” Levy nodded with a faint smile.

But her smiled fade away quickly. “But my parents never told me why grandma died or never said anything about its biggest side effects…”She paused and sighed. “Neither the runes I translated three years ago.” The flower she was holding turned black and shattered.

Gajeel rubbed the back of his neck. “Side effects?” His voice sounded more worried than expected.

“At first I didn’t understand anything, but it didn’t took me too long to figure out why the runes appeared or what they say.” Gajeel listened to her carefully. “They are a warning.”

“Warning about what exactly? Gajeel asked.

“The first one was…If I make misuse of it, my original magic will be annihilated from me…and I can’t afford to lose my solid script magic.” She created a small word “IRON” and give it to Gajeel. “This was the magic my parents taught me, it’s all that’s left of them in me.” She closed her eyes.

He looked at her worried face and asked. “There is another one, right?”

Levy nodded and looked directly at Gajeel’s red eyes. “I’m dying.” She whispered.

This took Gajeel by surprised and he acted without noticing. He shook his head and placed both of his hands in her cheeks. “Oi! Oi! Oi! What are ya’ saying?” He sounded desperate.

She placed one of her hands in his and continued. “If I use this magic for a long period of time, my life span, is shortened by long strides.”

“For how long have ya’ been using it?” Gajeel asked.

“Oh Gajeel, why do you think I came back?” His eyes widened as he understood her hidden message.

She started crying. “I can die at any moment.” Levy’s voice was quiet.

Gajeel hugged her tightly and whispered in her ear. “You’re not gonna die.”

Levy nuzzled into his chest. “I digged my own grave.” Gajeel held her tighter.

Her words hit him hard. He felt his heart ache but he didn’t know exactly why. He can’t lose her.

Gajeel took Levy by the cheeks and leaned forward. “Levy…” He sighed.

Levy’s eyes watched him as he moved closer. Gajeel moved his right hand to tilt her chin up. The space between them was getting smaller by the second. “I’m not gonna let you…” And with those word their lips met in a warming kiss.

TBC

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shadowtsukiyo · 7 years

Text

Gajevy Week: Prompt: Grief Tear Me Down to Build Me Up

Gajevy

Rated: M-ish

One-Shot

Tear Me Down to Build Me Up

Inspired by: “Come and Get It” by Krewella

Post Tartarus

“I’ve been thinking…”

“How come I have a feelin' it ain’t about anything good…”

“I'm thinking of… when you were in Phantom Lord.”

The silence was thick and uncomfortable.

“I don't wanna be thinkin' 'bout that, Lev… I hurt ya…”

“I know… but I realized it taught me a lesson. An important one.”

“You may see me struggle, but you will never see me quit…”

Levy read that line over and over. Despite how many times she tried to move her eyes away from it, she always ended up rereading the quote placed under the chapter title.

It described Fairy Tail.

It described her.

A soft sigh left her lips as it got her thinking.

Her family. Her friends. Her home. Her powers. Her present. Her future.

Her past…

Or more specifically her past with Gajeel. The events that shaped her currently.

It made her think of a lot of things about herself.

“Hey Levy!” Jet's voice pulled her from her thoughts as he and Droy slid across from her.

“What's got you so deep in thought?” Droy asked, offering her some of the cookies she had.

Absently she took a cookie and brought it to her lips, but rather than taking a bit her eyes glossed over in thought again.

“Earth to Levy!” Jet laughed, even after a year apart she was still the same, she blinked and gave them a confused look as she took a bite of the cookie. Giving an appreciative nod at the taste to Droy who grinned. “What are you so lost in thought about?”

“A lot of things really.” She hummed taking another bite. “Droy, this cookie is amazing.” Her fingers were in front of her mouth as she spoke, this earned a grin from the plant mage.

“No way, Lev. Cough it up.” Jet stayed firm as he watched the blunette swallow her bite.

“… My parents… Master Makarov… Phantom Lord… How I've changed.”

“Hold on, I must have heard you wrong. I thought you said Phantom Lord for a second.” Jet laughed awkwardly, trying to brush off her comment.

“I did.” Suddenly both men were silent.

“Why?” Jet's voice came out sharper than he intended.

“This quote reminded me of my dad… something he used to say when I was little… and something Master once said was very much like my dad's advice…”

“Daddy, I can't get it!” The tiny blunette, maybe five was huffing with a scowl. “How can I be an amazing mage like you if this keeps hap…happening!”

Her father was teaching her Solid Script magic, the basics at least. She was learning to do very simple nature scripts like “Air,” “Water,” “Stone,” “Fire,” and a defense script, “Hole" they were her first lessons.

Except Fire kept blowing up in her face. Her mother had just finished cutting the poor girl’s hair after she charred the ends.

“Once more, Levania. I know you can do it.”

This earned him puffed out cheeks and pout, but she did as she was told.

“Solid Scipt: F-I-R-E—eek!” She was once again thrown back, her small body against the ground as she sniffled. Soon she was loudly crying.

“Come now, none of that my blue bird.” Her father said, pulling her to her feet before he took a cloth to clean off her face.

“I can’t do it!”

“Yes, you can.” He held her firm. “What defines us is how we rise after we fall, Levania. Rise. Each and every time you fall, get back up. Understood?”

Levy looked at her dad with watery eyes. “I... I think so…”

It took a month, but she finally got the spell down while she was at Fairy Tail.

Her parents had died during an illegal Guild War… leaving Levy orphaned and sent to Fairy Tail three weeks prior to her getting the spell down.

Levy had just joined the guild. She was quiet.

It was very odd to Cana, and caused Gray to be extremely protective of her.

It caused Laxus to baby her.

She didn’t utter a word as she sat at a table, holding onto a large book of Fairy Tales that she received from her mother. Inside the cover had been her father’s encouraging words to her during that lesson had been written down… she couldn't even bare to look at it.

Last time she looked at it, she burst into tears, causing Gray and the adults to panic. She never spoke and suddenly she was crying.

“It is okay to cry.” Makarov's voice was soft as he stood behind Levy. “It is also okay to read that message.” His hand was on Levy's shoulder.

She physically wavered.

“Did you know I never met my mother? She died when I was born.” Makarov's words were gentle.

“My father didn’t tell me until I was thirteen… and it was crippling…er… I felt much like you do now.” He corrected himself at a confused look from the girl.

He had her attention. Good.

“He grabbed my shoulders and looked at me. 'Makarov, stop! Your mom wouldn’t want this! She never wanted you to be sad like this! Don't let it break you! No matter how hard it gets, life goes on!'"

He looked down at the girl, “I'm going to tell you the same thing. Don't let it break you, Levania. No matter how hard it gets, life goes in. It will always go on… don't fall behind.”

A loud sniffle made him weakly smile as soon Levy dropped the book and was loudly sobbing into his embrace. “I miss them!”

Everyone in the guild turned to the two.

“I know… I know you do. And that's okay. It's okay to miss them, but I promise you they’re watching over you and Fairy Tail is your family.”

Honey eyes peeked up, red from crying. “Really?”

“Yes, my dear… now go on… you have some people who’ve been very worried.”

He motioned to Gray and Cana.

Shyly, Levy went over to them, rubbing at her eyes to get the redness and puffiness to calm down, her tears having thankfully dried up mostly. “I… I'm…”

“It’s okay! We’re just glad you're okay! I'm Cana, this is Gray.”

“I'm… I'm Levy.”

Makarov smile as suddenly Cana pulled the younger girl into a tight embrace, soon both girls were laughing as Gray lost his clothing once more.

His eyes turned to the book and he grabbed a note card from the bar, writing what he told her before he slipped it into the book and put it by the three children.

It was the next day that Levy came up to him with a pen, “Please… right here… next to Daddy's…” She pointed at the open area on the inside of the cover.

That book was tucked away in her personal library in the home she shared with Lily and Gajeel.

She knew she was getting odd looks from the two men.

“I'm not angry at him, and you both know I forgave him a long time ago… it just made me realize something…”

“Levy… look, we love you. You're our best friend… but we never… never. Want to relive that day.” Jet's voice deepened. Droy glared at his friend for speaking to Levy like that.

Levy just tilted her head, “Then don't. You both are my friends. But you asked what I was thinking about, then asked me to clarify. If you didn’t want to know the answer, you shouldn’t have asked me why I was thinking of Phantom Lord.”

Levy had grown up, she wasn’t afraid to look anyone in the face and in her own way, tell them off.

She was done mourning her past. Her grief for the girl that she used to be… it was long gone.

It seemed Jet still needed time, and that was okay.

The ginger scowled before storming off. “I'm glad you made progress Levy…” Droy smiled. He had finally moved past the incident while they were all separated. “I… I think you should explain your revelation to Gajeel… he might need this understanding the most.”

Droy was so level-headed since she came back from Tenrou. The blunette happily got up and kissed his cheek. “Thanks, Droy… I will.”

Levy left the Guild to go find Gajeel. Usually he’d be training about this time.

She and Gajeel had been a couple for only a few weeks, the two of them were taking it very slow. Neither Gajeel nor herself had ever wanted a relationship this bad and at times it left them both fearful to make a move.

When she got to the clearing, she smiled. Gajeel and Lily were sparring, the Dragon Slayer was dripping with sweat as the two males focused on hand to hand combat, but judging by Lily’s sword carefully tucked away, they had practiced with magic and weapons as well.

“Oi, Lil’ time to take a break.” Gajeel called to the battle form Exceed when he noticed his girlfriend.

Lily just smirked and threw a towel at the Dragon Slayer before moving to grab his things. “I’ll see you at home, Gajeel. It was nice to see you Levy!” The Exceed waved at the blunette who waved back.

“You too, Lily!” Levy smiled before moving to smile at Gajeel.

“Ya okay, Shorty? I didn’t expect ya. I’m not upset or ‘nything, but ya don’t usually surprise me like this.” Gajeel was a little thrown.

“I want to talk about something. And… you won’t exactly like the topic.” Levy’s voice was soft, earning a look from Gajeel.

“Alright. Let’s sit in the shade.” He sighed, moving to take her hand. After several minutes, they were sitting side by side.

“I’ve been thinking a lot lately. Mainly about the past… mostly before I met you, but a lot of the things I learned then….” She spoke after a bit of silence.

He said nothing, just listened.

“I’ve been thinking…” She started to say.

“How come I have a feelin' it ain’t about anything good…” He couldn’t help but mutter, hearing her start.

“I'm thinking of… when you were in Phantom Lord.” She finished, her eyes looking towards him, and she watched him swallow hard.

The silence was thick and uncomfortable.

“I don't wanna be thinkin' 'bout that, Lev… I hurt ya…” His voice shook, his hands trembling. The man stiffened when she placed her hand on his. Crimson eyes looking to the blunette.

“I know… but I realized it taught me a lesson. An important one…” She whispered.

Silence descended upon them both again.

“You did hurt me.” He flinched at the words. “But… you made me bigger… you made me stronger.” She moved to carefully move onto his lap, her arms wrapping around him. “You made me learn a very important lesson.”

Gajeel didn’t know what to say, all he could see were the memories of her… up in that tree. When they fought the demons, and nearly died, he never got the chance to truly apologize.

“I…”

“Shh…” Levy gently pressed her finger to his lips, offering a soft smile. “I know… I already know you’re sorry for everything that happened… that you regret it.” She gently kissed his lips, and while she wanted to react to the tears that she saw in his eyes, but she couldn’t not yet.

“You made me realize many things back then. That… while I love Fairy Tail, I can’t always lean on them… that I needed to grow myself… Sometimes you have to get knocked down lower than you have ever been, to stand up taller than you ever were….” She said lightly.

“You did knock me down.” She cupped his cheeks, meeting his gaze. “But you… you built me back up. You made me big and made me realize how big I could be.”

“Even… even so. I can never…” Gajeel was struggling with words. Tears were in his eyes, anger at himself… at his actions. Hating himself.

“Maybe not… but I can. I can forgive you… and I love you.” She pressed her forehead to his. “I stopped grieving my past self, Gajeel. Stop grieving for your missed chances and the mistakes you’ve made.”

Gajeel’s arms wrapped around her, tightly squeezing her to his chest. “Let me… let me grieve her a bit longer, Levy… Let me grieve the you I put fear into a bit longer…” He whispered and held her close. “Without her… I would have stayed a bad guy…”

Levy just held him tighter, “I forgive you, Gajeel… and I’ll be here when you’re ready to forgive yourself.”

Gajeel nodded, his arms tight around him as he held her close.

It may have brought up bad memories, but it did something for him… it allowed him to work past it… he would be allowed to grieve… but Levy had moved past her grief…

She’d help him grieve, help him move past it, just as he helped make her big.

“I love you, Gajeel… I’m sorry I put you through this.”

A weak laugh escaped the man as he buried his face in her neck, tears still not falling.

“No Levy… this helps me. You have no idea how much this helps me, Lev.”

He would move past his grief. Just not yet.

#gajevy #gajevy week #gajevyweek #gajevy fanfic #gajevy fanfiction #Gajeel X Levy #Gajeel Redfox #gajeel and levy #fairy tail gajeel #fairy tail #fairy tail levy #fairy tail fanfiction #fairy tail fanfic #Levy McGarden

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