#but im sure the right people will want it

[wonryllis]

𝐏𝐑𝐎𝐅𝐈𝐋𝐄𝐒 & 𝐂𝐇𝐀𝐑𝐀𝐂𝐓𝐄𝐑 𝐈𝐍𝐓𝐄𝐑𝐕𝐈𝐄𝐖𝐒 & 𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐆𝐑𝐎𝐔𝐏𝐂𝐇𝐀𝐓𝐒

𝖼𝖺𝗇'𝗍 𝗒𝗈𝗎 𝗇𝗈𝗍𝗂𝖼𝖾 𝗁𝗈𝗐 𝖿𝖺𝗌𝗍 𝗆𝗒 𝗁𝖾𝖺𝗋𝗍 𝖻𝖾𝖺𝗍𝗌 𝖺𝗋𝗈𝗎𝗇𝖽 𝗒𝗈𝗎? 𝖼𝖺𝗇'𝗍 𝗒𝗈𝗎 𝗇𝗈𝗍𝗂𝖼𝖾 𝗁𝗈𝗐 𝗆𝗒 𝖾𝗒𝖾𝗌 𝗅𝗈𝗈𝗄 𝖺𝗍 𝗒𝗈𝗎? 𝖼𝖺𝗇'𝗍 𝗒𝗈𝗎 𝗇𝗈𝗍𝗂𝖼𝖾 𝗁𝗈𝗐 𝗂 𝗅𝗈𝗏𝖾 𝗒𝗈𝗎?

ׅ ꢾ꣒ find the MASTERLIST here.

PREVIEW. you always get what you want, spoiled with the love of everyone around you. and it's all innocent love, at least that's what everyone thinks. it comes with much surprise therefore, when heeseung makes a move on you. thirteen long years of being in the brother zone having made him utterly clueless that if he’s going to date you he has to pass through your actual brothers first. and he knows how scary they can be. especially since they are known to have a sister complex and he’s been the third scary one with them, numerous times before.

𝐈 check out the PROFILES.

PLS READ THE CONTENT BELOW ALL THE CHARACTER INFO IS LISTED IN JUST THIS ONE POST !

𝐈𝐈 tune in to the CHARACTER INTERVIEWS ( given by the characters themselves ! )

CHOI YN 20 ( fashion ), well what do i say? hello everyone i'm choi yn! im sure everyone knows me already ^^ .. what else do i say? hmm i love my life a lot! i love my brothers and heeseung and wonie so much, they are the closest people in my life! oh shit sorry riki too hehe oops. college has been fun since im doing exactly what i wanted and it's fun to hangout with won all the time. seungie brings me snacks all the time and binnie lets me eat cakes everyday even though junnie has scolded them not to cause i easily get dental problems and then he has to convince be to go to the dentist, eww.

LEE HEESEUNG 23 ( film ), if you ever stop hearing from me, please know that my day has come and i have chosen to be exposed. as much as jun and soobs love me, and as much as they love tiny(my yn, she's just real cute) if i ever dare speak of that kind of love with tiny in the same sentence it's my last moment on earth. jay and taehyun help a lot and i'd give everything to thank them for it but man they still haven't been able to actually help me get with yn?

CHOI SOOBIN 24 ( law school ), yes my sister is my everything, each one of her wishes no matter how stupid and idiotic they are, must be fulfilled. i think i was like ten when ynie said being a lawyer would be so cool, and it's been my life's motto now. law school kicks my ass yeah but whenever i think of how happy she'd be to see me as a badass lawyer it feels like nothing. i could easily help her win the divorce that's a plus point, i think i should start looking into divorce attorney things.

CHOI YEONJUN 25 ( model ), i swear scaring away my baby sister's admirers is one of my full time jobs besides runaway modelling but alas she is my sister of course she's a beauty. i know she will date and marry a motherfucking guy one day, and i won't be able to stop it but i hope that day takes the longest time to come. she was one of the first ones to say how good my dressing style was, if it wasnt for her i would not be one of the rising faces in the fashion scene today.

PARK JAY 22 ( music production ), being lee heeseung's childhood friend has been my life's greatest downfall. and being his emergency contact number one is probably the biggest mistake of my life. it's so so so infuriating to see him do nothing and panic over the fact that some might sweep her off her feet right before his eyes like fucker you gotta sweep her off her feet rather than worrying over how someone else might sweep her off her feet. taehyun probably understands me.

SIM JAKE 22 ( physics ), it's fun, so so fun i can not express it verbally man, 'm having a blast! there's so many new things to learn i am so happy with my major and my astronomy club thing is going so well too, it's been amazing so far. the only thing i dont like is my mates ignoring me, like i tell them about all these quantum mechanics things and how it's works like it's legit the coolest thing ever and they don't wanna listen me and then come to me for help with assignments like dude? there's no give and take here and it's not high school anymore? but i do it cause im nice :)

PARK SUNGHOON 22 ( communications ), first of all i gotta thank my man taehyun for letting me copy off of him to pass my semesters so far. as a full time commercial and photoshoot model, college is just a side quest for me at this point, just need an arm candy degree to show that i am infact educated contrary to what people think. oh and i'd like to tell this, don't tell anyone, i actually know all the drama going on and it's so funny but i gotta stay low if i wanna be safe. sometimes i do think of stirring things up but yeonjun man he scares me, i better be on his good side.

KIM SUNOO 21 ( journalism ), for real god am i the only one working my ass off here cause why the hell all these dicks be fucking up their lives and copying off people to survive like? look at me, every little gossip on campus and you know who to go to get the full info! exactly how it should be for a journalism major. i swear i am doing all the shit ass work here. i admit i slip sometimes especially with heeseung's secret in front of god forbidden yn but 'm just a human, and humans make mistakes yk? and please tell kai to fuck off please, thank you.

YANG JUNGWON 20 ( fashion ), it's a different feeling when three guys trust you with their precious sister. and it's a different feeling when that precious real spoiled girl treats you like the best buddy she could ever have. but it's not so fortunate when you gotta dash to protect anytime the brothers ping you, it's like a national secret agency part time job and it's the hardest thing when the target is someone like yn. i treasure her a lot, as a friend! yes, yet the times when her brothers get jealous of me are some of the most nerve wrecking times.

NISHIMURA RIKI 20 ( photography ), are we surprised here? no wtf have y'all not seen the pics i post on my twt like i got talent you have to accept it. especially a lot of talent in gaming and luck, my luck be through the roofff. just started lol a year ago and my YouTube Chanel six months ago and im already almost a diamond and about to hit a million subscribers.. talk about god's favorite! ha that's me. but the thing is more than that i wanna be yn's favorite like i know she says won and i are same but i know that kitty is closer. for now i like being glued to yn, but after figuring out things so easily it's hard to keep quiet.

CHOI BEOMGYU 23 ( film ), with the amount of hate train behind me it's a miracle i am still breathing and in one piece. praying all this ends quickly and my life is returned back to me or i'll go crazy it has been like what two? three? years already! i need my freedom. i can count and name with my fingers the people who hate me. actually no it's everyone. anyways, i share all classes with heeseung and lord is it the scariest part of my life. at least yeonjun and soobin would need time to hunt me down but lee heeseung? he's right behind me two rows, staring down my every movement. look it's not my fault okay?

KANG TAEHYUN 22 ( communications ), it wasn't consensual. it is very important to clear this up. i did not give my papers to park sunghoon by choice. he had to pay me hefty for that so there's no thank you man, dude is pretending. and i am fucking sick of covering for heeseung all the time like dude grow balls, real balls dig up some manly guts and fucking do it before i lose patience and fuck shit up. every moment of listening to him lamenting over his feelings is the most frustrating shit ever. make him hear this one for god's fucking sake.

HUENING KAI 22 ( journalism ), no matter how much everyone denies it, i know they won't survive a day without me like? i provide sunoo with all the gossip of our side? how else do you think heeseung sneaks around yeonbin with his feelings? god it's me i do the passing the parcel of info. i mean taehyun is also involved with them but then i am more useful than that reality check of a guy, i mean who needs reality when you can live in a fantasy! hehe i just outdid everyone with that! or not anyway moving on yn's cr— SUNOO: shut the fuck up bitch!

𝐈𝐈𝐈 learn about THE GROUPCHATS.

01. HEEYN TRUTHERS heeseung, jay, jake, sunghoon, taehyun and sunoo: the group that has been supporting heeseung in pursuing his feelings since he first revealed it to them. for whenever he fucks up and they have to discuss how to save his ass. normal chats happen too.

02. BOSS BABIES yn, jungwon, riki: the trio that has been friends since middle school, and sticks together. yn spends most of her time with them, that is in college. often goes out to hangout and these two are yn's only actual friends!

03. SHOOTERZ 4 YN yeonjun, soobin, heeseung and jungwon: they use this chat to text each other whenever someone upsets yn or she's going somewhere alone and they need jungwon to secretly tag along to give them updates later.

04. PRINCESS & HER KNIGHTS yn, yeonjun, soobin and heeseung: the main stars— spoiled baby and her overprotective boys. usually text her when it has to do something with the four of them, like when yn goes out or she needs someone to pick her up or accompany her or when they have dinner at each other's place and someone's missing and likewise.

05. PSYCHOS W/ SICKOS yeonjun, soobin, beomgyu, taehyun, huening kai and heeseung: well this is heeseung's other friend group with the yn brothers' friends that become his own after a while. this is yeonbin dominated friend group chat and beomgyu is main character lmao

START THE STORY — prologue 𓈒 ‎𓈒 ‎𓈒

TAGLIST . ( OPEN ) @s00buwu @lilyuwon @pockyyasii @nctislifue @shawnyle @enhastolemyheart @aaa-sia @snoopypupp @criminalyun @oddracha @satan-223 @diorsyun @hooniehon @fakeuwus @caramelcandescence @intromortal @kookify @yutasberryy @sumzysworld @nikiswifiee @shuichi-sama @primroselover @rayofsunshineeee @aishigrey @yjwluvs @soraokkotsu @nyfwyeonjun @srhnyx @trashx678 @wondipity @winuvs @hoondiors @niniissus @firstclassjaylee @biancaness send an ask to be added! (if your comment goes unnoticed it is not my responsibility)

#enhypen imagines #enhypen smut #HOPE Y'ALL FIND THIS FUNNY ENOUGH ㅠㅠ #enhypen smau #enhypen heeseung smut #heeseung smut #enhypen heeseung imagines #heeseung imagines #enhypen social media au #enhypen socmed au #enhypen social au #heeseung smau #enhypen hard hours #enhypen hard thoughts

[deepseametro]

Hey, I'm here from the AI hysteria post. I want to preface this by saying that I am an artist, and I'm coming here with the intention of understanding, not trolling. I had a really strong reaction to AI when it initially started to boom, and I've been trying to get to a more nuanced place.

I'm not sure if I misunderstood your post, but it seems like to me that an artist being afraid of/angry at a giant corporation for using AI is understandable? I don't care about individual people all that much, and I am under no illusion that some random Twitter guy posting AI art is going to steal my job, but I do care about my employment. It just... feels weird, for us to be sidelined like this and replaced by something that's often a downgrade in quality- not by virtue of being "fake art" or whatever, but simply because image generation still is a tool being workshopped, so to speak.

appreciate you approaching in good faith!

the post in question wasn't about what you're describing - in fact, i'm just as angry and critical of corporations displacing workers through any form of tech - it was about people's personals reactions to encountering AI art. specifically, it was about this recent drama over on twitter:

these are not people concerned abt labor rights of working class artists; they are personally offended and upset they encountered a single AI artist making art they enjoyed - i mean this person says it hurt them on a deep level (how????????)

this is the attitude im usually primarily criticizing. i despise corporate use of AI, im a communist! but this attitude of pure vitrolic hate and disgust towards a budding art medium is ridiculous and cruel. i care about your employment too! we share a common enemy and thats the ruling class; not fellow hobbyists or freelance artists.

[vex91]

Baek Harin - Heaven in hell

Pairing: Baek Harin x Female Reader

Fandom: Pyramid Game

Requested by: Anonymous

Request: im new here and Lokey in love with ur writing could I ask for harin x reader but the reader is grade F and harin just be crazy ASF like I'm talking girlie is threating you with your life and shit lmao (smut I'm begging also G!p harin if you're comfortable)

🛌I'll use this emoji every time I'm post an anon just so you know who's at the crime scene

Summary: Grade F was the worst thing that could happen to you... or so you thought, until you met the worst nightmare imaginable in person.

Warning(s): Smut, 18+ content, G!P Harin, Cursing, Smoking, Unprotected sex, Mentions of burning skin with a cigarette etc.

A/N: If a psycho then why hot? Thanks for requesting <3

3rd's POV

The sound of a whistle made your blood run cold, you instinctively looked at Suji who immediately got closer to you in order to help you if things went south. Looking to the side you saw Dayeon walking over to you smirking with every step, you started imagining everything she could do to you despite the whole class being there and watching.

"Unfortunately I'm not the one in charge of having fun with you. Harin is calling for you, if I were you I would hurry there, she doesn't seem too happy"

You weren't sure if you won lottery or lost it because as much as you were happy that Dayeon left you alone, you weren't too keen on seeing Harin. Suji noticed that when she pulled you to herself "You don't have to go Y/N or I can go with you" You appreciated how much Suji worried about you as your best friend, she hated that you were in grade F because it gave Harin a free pass of harassing you and she already was all weird with you before.

"It's okay, I'll be back" You squeezed her hand reassuringly and left the class, Dayeon's laugh at the back sending shivers down your spine.

Harin was waiting for you in an empty classroom that no one ever uses - one of her bright ideas as she wanted to have a space where she could played with her favorite toy in peace without any interruptions. The moment you walked in a strong smell of cigarettes hit you. Harin's eyes immediately wandered over your whole figure before she gestured you over. Not wanting to argue you did as she told you.

"I wondered why you took so long" She said as her free hand went to your hip "Now we will probably miss class because you're so slow" Dayeon was right about her being in a bad mood, the tension in the room felt suffocating as she put the cigarette she held near your mouth "Are you also gonna irritate me like the rest of these fools?" You quickly shook your head at her question, too scared to say anything bad.

"Then what are you waiting for?" Her eyes bored into yours as she waited for your move. You slowly opened your mouth and let her put the cigarette as you took a drag from it. She took it back with a satisfied grin and watched you exhale the smoke, coughing. Harin's grin only widened as her hand started lowering to your thighs, massaging them "I knew you were better than everyone else in this class, you're way more fun to be around" You gasped loudly when you felt her cigarette making contact with your skin, she quickly covered your mouth as she repeated the action on your thigh, burning another part of your skin.

She smiled at the way you struggled against her in pain before she dropped the now extinguished cigarette to the trash. She looked at you innocently as she said "I love when people are competent, are you?" You could only nod with glossy eyes because what else you could do? If you won't do what she says, she could make your life a living hell, even more than now.

"Quiet huh? Well you're right, it's better if you use your mouth for better use anyways" She pushed you down in front of her and freed her cock from her boxers. She looked down at you, putting her dick near your mouth and smearing it against your closed lips "Come on, you know what will happen if you start misbehaving. You're lucky you never saw me really angry before" You hated how calm she sounded while saying all of that to you. Finally having enough waiting she pushed it in your mouth, forcing you to suck it.

Her hand forcefully pushed your head up and down, causing you to not being able to keep up with her thrust but you quickly managed to start sucking her on your own. Your tongue licked all around her cock as she kept your head bopping on her. The silence in the room kept being interrupted with the sound of her groans and curses under her breath. She finally came with a particularly hard thrust and forced you down more to swallow all of it, nearly choking you but Harin didn't care, why would she anyways?

"See? You can do something useful when you want to" You mentally scoffed at it, as if she didn't forced you down on her cock the whole time. Before you could even say anything back to her, she changed your positions, she pushed you up and sat you down on the desk while she got in front of you, already pulling your panties off. She dragged her finger against your clit, smirking at how wet you were "You look so sad but deep down you're just as fucked up as I am because you clearly like it with how wet you are, so wet that I don't even need to prepare you to take me well" Harin laughed mockingly at you as she slapped your clit with her cock a few times before pushing in harshly making you gasp loudly again. Her hand quickly covered your mouth.

"You really want someone to walk in and see us like that? You're really fucked in the head and so fun" She laughed again before pulling out her phone and starting recording her dick going in and out of you "Since you're so dirty, I'll record everything well for you" Harin's hand squeezed your boob through the fabric of your shirt as she continued thrusting into you mercilessly, the sound of skin slapping resonated throughout the room as she fucked you roughly.

You hated how much you actually enjoyed her cock, you felt embarrassed of yourself for liking the way she treated you despite also wanting to get away from her. Maybe the fact that you can't run away from Harin and her twisted desires made you enjoy it, you weren't sure but you felt ashamed of your body for meeting her every thrust.

"I'm gonna cum in you and you're gonna take it all like a good girl, I know you want me to anyways, you're a slut for my cum after all" She whispered in your ear as she covered your mouth again, her thrusts became faster as she soon released all her seed into you, forcing you to stay close to her in case you wanted to pull away.

You wouldn't anyway because you knew that you had to let Harin do anything she wanted with you and you couldn't stop it. That was your life after all.

#vex writes #🛌 anon #pyramid game x reader #pyramid game reactions #baek harin x reader #baek harin #baek harin smut #pyramid game smut #smut

[ihopeiexplode]

📱 “Two Fools Inlove” [←Previous | Next→]

—

"you know you didn't have to bring anything right?"

"yeah I know, just felt like bringing something"

"what's in it?"

"food what else dumbass?"

"coming from you probably someones head"

"wow very funny."

As he gave you the bag you were greeted with some desserts, homemade ones to be exact

"I thought you were bad at cooking?"

"Ive gotten better"

"sure you have..."

—

—

"SUKUNA LOOK LOOK"

"What am I looking at?"

"isn't the statute pretty??"

"I guess? All I see is some naked woman"

"you clearly don't understand art..."

"how do I not understand art when I literally paint, do poetry and calligraphy"

"you expect me to believe that?"

"yes"

"wait your serious?"

"did you think im not?"

"I find that hard to believe..."

"what hobbies did you think I had??"

"dunno tormenting people maybe? You seem like the type"

—

—

"I don't know how to bowl"

"how? It's literally so easy just throw the ball and there"

With that he'd toss bowling the ball to you as if it was nothing??

The moment he tossed it you immediately moved to the side

"WHAT THE FUCK??"

"your being dramatic it isn't that heavy"

"YES IT IS?? I COULD'VE BROKEN A BONE"

"I'd break it myself if you keep acting like a drama queen"

You'd roll your eyes before picking up the ball from the ground and throwing it into the bowling lane, as you did,, however you didn't even manage to hit a single bowling pin..and when Sukuna saw it he immediately laughed at your failed attempt

He'd pick up another ball and hand it to you as he stood behind you

"you're doing it wrong, here"

With that he'd manhandle your body into a proper stance, once he was finished he backed up and told you to throw

And when you did you managed to hit all of the Bowling pins as you did so you immediately jumped and giggled

Sukuna was about to find it adorable but you just HAD to act cocky. When you did he immediately flicked your head

"you wouldn't have done it without me, don't act to confident"

"can't a girl dream?"

"yeah but you can't"

"wow okay.."

—

—

"Sukuna what are you doing here?"

"Yuji asked me to come along to watch him skygazing"

"I'm surprised you agreed"

"didn't had a Choice"

"how come?"

"our mom told me I can't leave him alone, which is ridiculous he's perfectly fine by himself"

"speaking of wheres Yuji?"

"he ran into Megumi so he's having some quality time with his 'bestfriend', anyway why are you here?"

"just felt like it"

"what's so good about skygazing your just looking at stars what's so good about it"

"do you always have to be bitter?"

"always"

—

Both you and Sukuna would be sitting on the blanket you laid out on the floor as you two sat close to one another while looking at the stars, till you spoke

"you know Sukuna, I've been thinking"

"didn't know you had a brain"

"nevermind."

"I'm kidding, continue"

"I guess you aren't really that bad, you fare un to hang out with, surprisingly...I thought I wouldn't have that much fun spending this much time with you but guess I was wrong"

"so what were friends now?"

"dunno, if you want I guess"

He wants to say something so badly. But he knows once he does his feelings would spill out. And he doesn't wanna do that right when you both are finally on good terms.

—

—

Sukuna and uraume would be talking to one another as they sat down on a nearby chair

"how's things with y/n?"

"I guess it's okay, I went skygazing with her yesterday and she sorta confessed how I'm not that bad,"

"looks like you have a chance"

"chance for?"

"a chance to get with her? What else? It's obvious you like her"

"don't be ridiculous. Why would I like her?

"why would I like someone like y/n, the only reason I'm doing this is for the project nothing else, it's not like I care, let alone have feelings towards her"

"if anything when she told me her little confession I was on the verge of laughing, she really is pathetic isn't she? As if I'd be her friend"

"After this is over I'll just stop talking to her, simple,"

He's wondering why he's saying all of this? He knows he likes you but he won't admit that. He won't admit he's been chasing after you for years. He won't admit how he liked you despite how you felt about him. Sukuna isn't some pathetic loser he won't beg. He won't act desperate

After Sukuna finished talking he'd noticed how quiet they became, before he could ask what was wrong he heard a sound behind him, and when he turned around he saw you...

You stood behind him as you just stared at him wide eyed with your fist clenched, you were a fool to think a person like Sukuna would change, why would he ever change? It's still the same Sukuna deep down no matter what he does.

"how much did you hear?"

"all of it."

—

[⛩️] @: Likes & Reblogs R appreciated! ^^

A/N: be honest does this sound like Sukuna atp...he's so out of character I'm about to jump off a cliff

Taglist: @catobsessedlady @hellomeow12 @0-candlecove-0 @shivzypuff @swirlingcurses @1-800-choke-that-ho @attackonnat @chilichopsticks @getoxmahito @memenojutsu @uhnanix @ichorstainedskin @needtoloveoutloud @love-me-satoru @s-j320 @allthestarsarecloserrrrrrr @goj0sunglasses @svtvrnal @haitanibros0007 @punkhazardlaw @mslydiaa @jayathelostdragon @caileysdead @rixyaaaa @minzxec @rzcnlb

#jjk smau #sukuna x reader #ryomen sukuna x reader #jjk sukuna #Sukuna x you #ryomen sukuna x you

[anonymouscheeses]

Drew my favorite! Sammy is the best I love her character smm >:3 she's also become more relatable with the problems she's been ignoring in episode 3! So I might kin her more now but thats fiine... I haven't watched past ep 3 SO NO SPOILERS ON THIS POST TY!!

AND THEN MY PRECIOUS BABIES 😭 YASAMMY FOR LIFE‼️ UGH IM SO GLAD THAT THEY ARE ACTUALLY CANON IT MAKES ME TEAR UP! BROOK IS SHIPPING THEM EVEN IN DEATH 😍 I CANT BELIEVE SAMMY SAID YAZ IS PULLING AWAY FROM HER?? NONONO IM NOT READY FOR ANGST. ESPECIALLY BETWEEN THEM TWO?? NOO!!

Anyway since I haven't watched the entire show I'm gnna theorize real quick heheheh

SO. The dinosaurs are definitely being controlled by someone but who? I'd say kenji's dad but I'm not sure, I kinda forgot what happened to him 😭 he's still alive tho right? So I wouldn't put it off the table but it could also be Dr. Wu or whatever tf his name is I completely forgor abt him. Anyway to the stuff im actually interested in- BROOKLYN. SHES DEFINITELY ALIVE. RIGHT?? (Don't answer that) THERES NO WAY THEYD KILL OFF THE BEST CHARACTER RIGHT??? THERES NO WAY. PLUS THEY ALREADY RECASTED HER IN THE FLASHBACKS(btw I think the voice is pretty good! Idk if people have complained abt it yet but if they have... shut up??) SO WHY WOULD IT MATTER TO KEEP HER DEAD? THATS A WASTE OF MONEY PLUS. PLUUS. idk. I just kinda want her alive bro.... SURVIVE BROOKLYN. SURVIVE.

Also Yasammy marriage proposal one day? Please? 🗣🔥🔥

#camp cretaceous #jurassic world: camp cretaceous #chaos theory #jurassic world chaos theory #jurassic world #jurassic world camp cretaceous #art #fanart #artists on tumblr #digital art #yasammy #sammina #yasmina x sammy #sammy gutierrez #sammy x yasmina #jwcc yasmina #yasmina fadoula #jwcc sammy #jwct spoilers #jwct #jwct sammy #jwct yaz #jwcc brooklynn #jwcc #jwct brooklynn #BROOK IS BI NO ONE CAN TELL ME OTHERWISE #do we still headcanon sammy as trans because thats one of my dearest old headcanons 😔 #AH. ITS GOOD TO BE BACK IN THIS FANDOM. I JST KNOW YALL ARE DOIN GREAT. MWA MWA #GRAHHH YASAMMY FOR LIFE IEIWISIIDIQBBD #guys is it bad i love sammy but she looks like my ma a bit too much 😨 well i love my ma sooo nahh 😎

[thestoryofusstan]

Infinity

pairing: college au!harry x reader

summary: The guy next door likes to blast music. You maybe-sorta-kinda really like him.

warnings: cussing, not edited, im not in college idk how it works…

—

You didn’t want to be annoying. Truly, you didn’t. But you and your roommate, Daisy, were asleep.

Or…

Trying to be.

It was difficult with the blasting music next door.

And honestly, you had tried to avoid it. Had let them play their loud music for months now. Sent Daisy over to tell them to shut up so you didn’t have to (because despite her name, she was terrifying when she got mad).

But.. really?

It had to be, like… three in the morning. They’d been blasting it since nine pm, and you hadn’t gotten a wink of sleep.

So, clad in your bunny slippers, pajama pants you stole from someone (don’t ask who, you don’t remember) and a Fleetwood Mac shirt four sizes too big (because that was all they had at the thrift store), hair pulled back into a very messy braid, and glasses you rarely wore because you liked yourself better with contacts (mainly because you were so blind your glasses made your eyes look bigger), you stomped on over.

You pounded on the door (not really.. your knock barely made a sound), and miraculously, they heard you and opened the door.

A boy opened it.

No. Not a boy.

A cute boy. A very, very cute boy.

You blinked in surprise. You had expected girls… were boys even allowed on the same floor as girls?

“Ehm.. can I help you?” he asked after you were silent for a little too long.

“Oh. Right. Uh.. would you mind turning the music off? I have a final tomorrow, and.. I’m next door, so.. I can kinda hear it. On full blast. Um.. you don’t have to turn it off.. just.. down..”

He sighed, turning into the dorm to shout, “I told you to turn it down, Lou!” he turns back to you. “Yeah. Sorry. My mate’s practically deaf, I’m pretty sure. Doesn’t realize how loud he is… you say you’re next door?”

You nod.

“You got the alarmingly scary roommate named after a flower?”

Another nod. Why was he making small talk? You wanted to sleep.

“Ah. Glad y’didn’t send her over.”

He eyes you up and down, giving that sentence another meaning you didn’t really like.

"Right. Well.. just.. turn it down, please," you give an awkward smile and nod.

When you turn to walk away, he stops you, "’ey-- little rude to not give me y'name, isn't it?"

"Oh. Uh.. I’m Y/N."

He grins, "Well, hello, Y/N. I’m Harry."

You nod, pursing your lips as you pull on a strand of your hair.

There’s a beat of silence, and you contemplate just throwing yourself off a bridge, honestly.

"I'll see you around, Y/N."

With that, you scurry off to your room. Despite being uncomfortable in the moment, it wasn't because of him. You just were horrid at talking to boys.

-

A few weeks passed, and you accepted the fact that maybe you wouldn't see your neighbor as much as you hoped you would.

And really, you weren’t surprised. You’d never seen him before, why would that change? It made perfect sense that he remained as elusive as he had apparently always been.

Well, that is, until you were dragged to a party you really didn’t wanna go to in clothes you really weren’t all that comfortable wearing at your house— let alone at some douchey frat party.

The first hour was fine because it was early, so only a handful of people were drunk.

The second hour was less enjoyable, the longer the party went on, the more people drank.

In the third hour, your friends shoved a drink in your hand, and once you finished it, they sucked you into taking far too many shots.

The fourth hour was when you started to get antsy. You were pushing over the edge of just being a little too tipsy, and it was hot and sticky and crowded and had it always been so hard to breathe?

You shoved your way out of the crowd and onto the empty (or so you thought) patio, and exhaled. It was less of a patio and more of a balcony, since it was the second floor— but it was huge. 20 people could comfortably stand on it and not be crowded.

Your heels clack on the concrete as you walk to the edge of the patio, leaning on the railing as you take deep breaths.

“That bad in there?”

You nearly jump out of your skin at the familiar british voice. You spin around with wide eyes and a hand over your heart, “Jesus Christ! Don’t do that!”

“Sorry!” he raises his hands in defense. “I thought you saw me!”

“Clearly not!” you pause and take a deep breath, “Sorry— I’m kinda drunk and I hate being drunk. I’m paranoid enough when I’m sober, so when I can’t even walk straight I’m extra jumpy and anxious. And I honestly didn’t even wanna come out tonight, my friends just dragged me along and put me in some ‘going out clothes’ that I don’t think I even have the confidence to wear alone in my dorm! And—“

You pause at his grinning face.

“I’m rambling, aren’t I? Sorry, I get nervous when I’m drunk. Did I already say that? I think I did. Anyway, I talk a lot when i’m nervous, and I don’t really know how to talk to guys in the first place. If I get too annoying just tell me to shut up and I will. I don’t even realize I’m doing it half the— I’m still going. Sorry.”

“No harm done. I quite like your nervous rambling.”

Your cheeks heat up.

“So what made you run for the hills to come out here?” he asks, standing up from the chair he was sitting on.

“I’m not really a party girl.”

“Yeah, I could’ve guessed that.”

You frown, “What’s that supposed to mean?”

“Not in a bad way!” he rushes out. “But you just.. are a jumpy person, like you said. Like a bunny. I’d be surprised if you went to parties every weekend on your own free will.”

And really— you have to laugh, because he’s right. “Yeah. I’m definitely not a party girl. And I am not the girl who wears this stuff. Not that it’s bad! But.. I’m just not.. comfortable in this,” you shrug, pulling at the short skirt.

The outfit your friends had picked out consisted of a white, very mini mini-skirt, a white cropped tank top, and some black heels. If the skirt was just a little longer, perhaps a little looser, you’d be fine. If you could at least cover up your belly button— you’d always hated it for no real reason except for the fact that, as embarrassing as it sounds, belly buttons freaked you out.

“Well, if it’s any consolation, I think you look great,” he smiles.

You probably look like a tomato’s long lost sibling by now.

“Thank you.”

“But.. I also think you look great in pyjamas and bunny slippers and glasses and that little pout telling me my music’s too loud.”

“Hey!” You cross your arms.

“I’m kidding, I’m kidding,” he laughs as you try to smack his arm. “So, if you don’t like parties, why’re you here?”

“My friends wanted to go out,” you shrug. “I was done the second we got here.”

He pauses, as if mulling over a thought in his brain and you desperately want to know what, before he speaks, “D’you wanna go home, then?”

You blink at him, “What? I— I mean, yeah. I do, but I’m kinda drunk and all my friends are plastered—“

“I’ll drive you,” he cuts you off before you talk yourself up a wall. “Live next door t’ya anyway.”

“Really? I— are you sure?”

“Yeah,” he shrugs, “Wouldn’t have offered if I was. Let’s get y’out of here.”

-

The trip to the car took far longer than necessary, mainly because you ran into your friends doing shots and got sucked into one more round, which turned into ten more rounds.

By the time you were done, Harry was half carrying you out. He’d long since looped your arm around his shoulders, and his own arm around your waist as you stumbled towards the car.

“Alright,” he sighed once the two of you finally reached the car. “In you get, love.”

You can’t even stop yourself from grinning ridiculously as he helps you get in the passenger seat and buckle.

He shuts your door and slides into the driver’s seat. You stare at him. He smiles, but doesn’t call you out.

He turns on the radio, and you gasp. “I love this song!”

“Do you, now?” he laughs, and it’s almost teasing. Or, perhaps, it is, and your brain is too fogged up to comprehend that.

“Yes!” you exclaim, turning up the volume as Cruel Summer blasts through his car.

“I’m drunk in the back of the car! And I cried like a baby comin’ home from the bar! Oh, oh!” you sing, extremely off key.

“Quite the singer,” he comments.

“Said I’m fine, but it wasn’t true! I don’t wanna keep secrets just to keep you! And I snuck in through the garden gate—“

-

“You’re pretty,” you comment as Harry helps you up the stairs.

“You think so?”

“Yeah. You have nice eyes. And hair. Your hair’s really soft.”

“Don’t think you’ve ever touched my hair, so I’m not sure how you came to that conclusion, babe.”

You grin. Babe. “It looks soft. Duh.”

“Oh, of course. Duh.”

You think he’s teasing you, but you don’t care to tease back or get offended.

“Alright. Where’re your keys?”

“My keys! They’re… with Daisy.”

“No spares?”

“No,” you pout. “Do I have to sleep in the hallway?”

“No, ‘course not,” he shakes his head, pausing. “Ehm.. new plan. Gonna set you up in my bed, yeah? That okay?”

You nod with a hum.

He moves you one door over and fumbles with the key before finally pushing the door open.

“Bed’s right here, love. In you get, c’mon.”

He helps you sit down on the bed, and you rest your head against the wall.

“Hey, hey— don’t sleep yet.”

“Why?” you whine.

“Gotta get you comfy,” he explains, tugging your shoes off. He quickly goes to the dresser before pulling out pants and a shirt.

“You need help changing?”

You frown and nod.

“Alright. I won’t look, love. Promise.”

True to his word, Harry turns you around so your back is to him as he helps you get out of the tank top. He quickly slips the t-shirt over it.

He lays you down on the bed and slaps a hand over his eyes as he pulls your skirt down and helps you into the pants.

“Alright.. better, yeah?”

You nod, lying on the pillow. He helps you under the covers that smell like him and gives you an extra blanket.

“M’kay. Gonna sleep on the top bunk, yeah? Just say my name if y’need me.”

“Thank you,” you mumble.

“‘Course.”

He moves to walk away, but— “Wait, Harry—“

He turns back to you, “What’s wrong?”

You lift a hand up and run it through his hair. “I was right. It’s soft.”

He laughs.

“Go to bed, babe.”

“Sir, yes, Sir.”

He knew you’d probably be embarrassed in the morning, but he wouldn’t tell you that he enjoyed how touchy you got when drunk.

You didn’t plan on telling him that you’d slightly sobered up on the drive home and just played the drunk bit up as an excuse.

And your keys were in your purse.

-

a/n: YAYYYY COLLEGE AU HARRY!!!

#harry styles #harry styles x reader #harry styles fic #harry styles imagine #harry styles oneshot #harry styles one shot #harry fic #harry styles au #harry styles angst #harry #college harry #college!harry styles #fbh #lhh #phh #harry styles fluff #harry styles fanfiction

[freyito]

ꜱʟᴇᴇᴘɪɴɢ ɪɴ ʏᴏᴜʀ ɢᴀʀᴅᴇɴ

✭ pairing(s): gallagher x ftm reader

★ summary: Gallagher has been the only one in your life to make you feel like a man. Even if you can mold and shape yourself in the Dreamscape, make yourself look and feel as Cis as you want, and yet, nothing has been able to fill the hole you feel within your very existence... aside from Gallagher. And now you can't find him. You can't find Gallagher. You can't find him.

✧ a/n: HAPPY PRIDE MONTH!!!!! im gonna be writing a lot more x male readers and especially a lot more x ftm readers... i started this blog cause wherever i looked in whatever fandom i was in i never found many male readers... and especially barely any ftm ones... and it feels like i havent written any proper x m! reader fics in a while, soooo... we'll start here. i'll still write gn reader of course!!!! but i like lowkey haven't written much that matches my identity in a bit.

🗒 cw: ftm reader, 2.2 story spoilers, dysphoria like mad dysphoria, anxiety, depression, sensory overloard, grief (?), hurt/no comfort, proofread

✎ wc: 2.2k

The Dreamscape has been quiet lately. Even Golden Hour was quiet, silent, and whenever you looked to the sky, its brilliance had begun to dim. The Dreamflux Reef had always been quiet, too, and yet now, it was uncanny. Micah had been so aloof, answering your questions curtly, and Gallagher hadn’t even sent you a text. Every time you texted him, it never went through, as if he wasn’t in an area with service. Which was normally okay, you knew he had to be out on a job or something, but it had been a whole week and he hadn’t even come back to his bar. When you had asked anyone about Gallagher, they had given you this look like they didn’t know where your lost dog was… which isn’t exactly far from the truth, you suppose. But you could see some sort of guilt behind their eyes. And that made you uneasy.

Sure, he had gone weeks at a time without being with you, but he always sent texts, and most people knew where he was, especially the locals. His last text to you was an ‘I love you babyboy.’, which isn’t abnormal, he had a habit of texting you that specifically around five times a day. He had to drill it into your head. He always made sure you knew you were loved, especially by him. You were ‘something special’, as he said, ‘the best thing that ever happened to him’, ‘his pretty boy’, and the list goes on. But your phone remains eerily silent.

You can’t help but check it every other minute, wading through the crowds of Golden Hour, the last place you wanted to be right now. No one in Dreamflux Reef would give you a definitive answer, no one had seen him, or if they had, they gave you indecisive answers. He was out on a case, he was at the lounge, anything to get you off their backs. You had to admit, you were becoming increasingly nagging, annoying, even. But who wouldn’t? Your boyfriend had been gone a whole week with no trace of him, no communication, and you were starting to think the worst.

Golden Hour makes your head spin, looking under every literal rock you can find, getting any info you can from the most lucid strangers and even mumbling drunkards. You are desperate, any little bit of information you use. Even if they had just seen a man with brown hair or a man with hazel eyes. Of course, none lead you to Gallagher. And the Bloodhounds aren’t of any help either, they all stare at you with confused looks and some even tell you to stop playing around.

You’ve already given up, the hustle and bustle of Golden Hour making you feel even more hopeless, the feel of everyone's eyes on you, not fitting in, it all sinks in once more. You were better off putting up lost dog posters at that point. Was it possible for people to go missing in the dreamscape? You had no idea, but you were holding onto the hope that perhaps this was all some twisted nightmare that had crept into your head, but each step you took disproved that thought.

Perhaps reality will have answers, and while you feel so reluctant to wake up, to be seen once more. You had never met Gallagher out of the dreamscape, and only now did you realize what you could be getting yourself into. Perhaps he had just… left? After so many years? Surely not, right?

You return to reality, unsteady. Your body feels frail, even if you had been maintaining it properly. It feels odd to be back in reality, where suddenly how you look, how you talk, and your mannerisms all mattered. You had to act masculine, you had to shut up and walk tall, hyper aware of the eyes on you. Even if it only takes only a minute to get to the front desk, even if you know the guests will never recognize you in the dreamscape. You still can’t help but feel self-conscious, being able to hide behind the veil of the dreamscape for so long, now out in reality, feeling as if you were stripped bare for all to see. Which you weren’t, but perhaps your nerves were getting to you.

When you reach the front counter, your nerves don't abate. They only grow in size, the fear quickly creeping through your system. There was no guest named Gallagher, and you didn’t even know what room he had been staying in. They can’t tell you anything considering that you yourself aren’t the customer they are looking for. But the way they look at you just as the people in Golden Hour and Dreamflux Reef do tells you all.

Reluctantly, you make it back to your room. You don’t know if you want to go back to the Dreamscape, you’re already shook up as is. If something so dire could make you resurface from the vast, blissful ocean that was the Dreamscape, why would you go back? No sign of him for a week, reality or otherwise, and not a word from those closest to him. Do you really wish to go back? Where you know your current efforts have failed. Where that sinking feeling that you know he’s gone takes hold of you?

You stare at the dreampool for a second longer, trying your best to shove down your doubts and your fears, and sink back into the sweet allure of dreams, waking up once more in the Dreamflux Reef. You stay where you are for another minute, a place you’ve called home for several years, a place that would be filled with hearty laughter, maybe even the clinking of glasses, and smell like Gallagher’s mild cologne. That scent has dimmed recently, either because he hadn’t come home, or perhaps you were… used to it. His clothes were still strewn about on the bed, what he was going to wear the day after he had disappeared. You didn’t dare move them, not once, afraid of losing all the little things about him.

When you finally exit the house, the streets feel colder. It’s even quieter than before, and most residents look… somber. Perhaps they always looked that way, and you just didn’t know. You figure you’d try your luck with Micah again, either to get closure or just wallow with someone who was close to Gallagher, you are unsure.

You had done your best to ignore the… tower that seemed to breach out of nowhere in the Reef, despite how tall it had been and just how oddly enchanting it was. You, like many of the Penacony locals, didn’t enjoy change. To have something like that just simply grow out of the ground you knew when those Trailblazers came around was jarring. That had also been the day that Gallagher had stopped coming home, and the events that followed had made you so desperate to find him once more. This beautiful dream, torn asunder by some madman’s delusion of a grander, peaceful life. You never did like the family, you never liked Sunday.

On that note, Micah was nowhere to be seen, at least where you looked. Not all the way down in the alleys or by the train station, not in the dive bar playing pool, nowhere. You had no where but to ascend those damned stairs that faced towards a false moon. You didn’t want to, not at all. It wasn’t intimidating, but every time you lingered near it for too long, you felt uneasy. It had an air to it that spoke of danger, something that told you it ‘was not for you’. And here you were, stood in front of it and the three graves that paid homage to it.

The first step you take bathes you in a stillness unlike one you’ve ever felt. Tranquility follows as you continue to walk, the world is suddenly so quiet, the hustle and bustle of the Reef fades out, and you are left with blissful nothingness. The only sound that follows you is your steps. It isn’t so bad when you think about it, it’s comforting, in a way.

Micah is tending to the plants that surround a small little courtyard. He’s relaxed, untensed, and seems genuinely at peace. It’s been rare to see someone like that in recent days. When he hears you, he lifts his head and gives you a soft smile, one that reeks of pity, as if he knows what you are going to ask him.

“Micah–”

“I have no idea where Gallagher is,” Micah sighed, his smile faltering slightly. “Not a text, not a word.”

At this point, you knew people were lying to you. Micah’s reminder only makes you realize just how much people were. “I know that. Tell me what happened to him.”

Micah is taken aback by your blunt reaction, but easily gives in. The jig is up it seems, and he doesn’t fight back any longer. With a soft huff and slump of his shoulders, he sets aside his current task, turning his full attention towards you.

“Then we’re gonna have to sit down and talk. It’s a bit of a doozy.”

.  * 　　　 ✦     .     　⁺ 　 .

Your head spins with all the details. It’s all so confusing, Gallagher, being… fictional? The man you had fallen in love with was simply just a creation, not tangible, not real. What were you supposed to do with that information? All you had been doing for the past hour or so is staring at the wall. Your room is silent, as is all things now, dark and lonely. It’s suffocating. You feel empty, devoid of whatever was there, whatever had filled the hole in your heart, as cliche as it was.

A hollow home, a hollow heart, and not a soul to mend it. Those welcoming arms are no more, or perhaps, never were. And yet, his clothes still remain, his toothbrush and cologne and shampoo and everything else stay in the bathroom as if he were. If you spaced out long enough, you could still hear his hearty laughter, if you sink a little deeper into the pillows you can smell faint traces of his shampoo. Anything to hold onto what you love. Who you love.

You need to drown yourself in something before you lose your mind. You want to cry, and yet… you can’t. It is still all catching up to you. You wander around the house mindlessly, desperate for something to happen. Anything. But there is nothing. When you stop, there is null, a terrifying distance between you and the empty kitchen. You have to get out of here, you have to leave, this home is not yours anymore. It is simply a house.

Your feet bring you away from the Reef, finally, settling you in the Reverie. You follow a familiar path, one that you had walked on a particularly bad night, that had led you to the Dreamjolt Holstery. It was unwise of you to fall in love with the mixologist, but here you were, several years in, finding out he was quite literally made up.

Slowly, you take a seat at the bar, the lounge around you empty, dead. You have no idea where the bartender is, but you don’t care. This is the same seat you had taken that night. It was something you should’ve forgotten, really, such a minor detail that now felt all too big and meaningful to your heart. You can still remember what had torn you up, it was a particularly bad day, feeling too dysphoric, and no matter what you did, even in the Dreamscape, it had done nothing to affirm your identity more. So you sought out a drink, or a few, to wash down that bitter taste that plagued your taste buds all day. And there he was, a little disheveled as always, eyebags, gravelly voice, something about him just… washed over you as if he were a dream. Which, looking back, apparently he was. You remember fighting between two thoughts; wanting to be him, or wanting him. To be a man so… masculine, gruff, big and intimidating, something like that…

Your nostalgic daydream is broken by steps, and a figure above you. You look up, hoping that you’ll see the same scene once more, that Gallagher will shoot you a smile and a chuckle, ask you what’s got you down, but instead, it’s Siobhan. She looks down at you with a sympathetic smile, as if she knows exactly what you were thinking about. You can’t tell if you feel angry or sad, or neither. You simply push those feelings down.

“What can I get you tonight?” She asks, her voice even and calm as always.

You take a minute to think, unsure if you want something strong to keep you occupied or something that could serve as a tribute. Ultimately, you settle with…

“A glass of uh… The Big Sleep,” You can’t help but chuckle lightly at the name, even if the chuckle was devoid of joy. Siobhan doesn’t mention it, simply smiles and nods.

“... To the ghosts of the past?”

“Yeah… to the ghosts of the past.”

© freyito, 2024 | masterlist | queue | kofi | star header by roseschoices DO NOT REPOST AS YOUR OWN OR USE FOR AI/AI CHATBOTS.

#⁺◟freyito #hsr x reader #honkai star rail x reader #gallagher x reader #gallagher hsr x reader #hsr x male reader #honkai star rail x male reader #gallagher x male reader #gallagher hsr x male reader #hsr x ftm reader #honkai star rail x ftm reader #gallagher x ftm reader #gallagher hsr x ftm reader

[mrsshabana]

honestly i need a story time about the cult? also the link to that podcast, im intrigued now lol

𝐌𝐲 𝐞𝐱𝐩𝐞𝐫𝐢𝐞𝐧𝐜𝐞 𝐛𝐞𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐢𝐧 𝐚 𝐫𝐞𝐥𝐢𝐠𝐢𝐨𝐮𝐬 𝐜𝐮𝐥𝐭

Ok children gather around. It's story time 🤓

Note: Now I won't provide a link because I talk about a lot of personal stuff including my name and location, and I don't want so many people having access to that. But I don't mind telling my story here.

Content warning: Mentions of religious trauma and eating disorders

Ok, so let me set the scene. I was 18 and moved out of my parents' house. I lived in a ghetto apartment near my university where I was studying art.

Now when I moved out my parents stopped talking to me. So I really felt alone, I had no family, no friends, and I was in a new place so I was very desperate to have a connection with someone. So really I was the perfect victim for a cult because I was vulnerable.

One day I was walking out of the mathematics building when a student stopped me and asked me if I would like to read the bible with her. She was a Korean international student and she was really nice so I was like sure why not. Now at this point, I wasn't super religious but I did consider myself a Christian. But I never knew the bible very well and my family was the kind of family that only went to church on easter and Christmas.

So anyway, I read the bible with her and she explained it to me. The way she explained the passage was insinuating that there was a female version of god. That was something I had never heard of before but it was interesting to me so I decided to come with her to her bible study.

Long story short it ended up being this organization called "The World Mission Society Church of God." I went to their church and spent hours with them every Wednesday and Saturday because they made me feel accepted. They welcomed me and became like my family which I didn't have at the time.

Something I really loved about them was that their church was so diverse. There were so many different kinds of people there, I really felt welcome. Because growing up churches seemed so segregated. I'm biracial, my mom is white and my dad is black so growing up we either went to the white church or the black church. And at both I felt like people would stare at me and my family and that I wasn't welcome there.

So it felt really nice to have such a diverse church where I felt truly welcomed. Anyway, I ended up making a lot of friends there and I stayed with them for about 6 months. Then I figured out they were actually a cult. It's a long story but I won't go into it because this isn't even the main part yet.

After leaving the World Mission Society I felt really lonely again because I lost the only friends and sense of belonging I had. But I had to just keep going.

Maybe about 3 months later this random Korean guy approached me on campus and he asked me if I'd like to participate in a survey thing about the bible. I was skeptical at first because my previous church had told me that every Korean person was a part of their church. (Which obviously is NOT true). But my mind was thinking, "Oh no, what if they are trying to get back to me."

But I decided that it's not right to assume that this man is a part of that cult just because he's Korean. So I agreed to participate in this survey and I gave him my phone number.

Basically, a professor was writing a book where she'd answer people's most common questions about the bible. And she was surveying students to collect questions for the book. It sounded pretty cool to me so I was very interested.

I met up with the professor at a Starbucks on campus and I answered her questions about things I've always wondered about the bible. We'll call this lady Anya.

During our meeting, I expressed to Anya how I felt discarded by god because of my previous cult experience. I felt like I wasn't worthy of his love and I was very ashamed of what I did. Because we would literally pray to a human man who claimed to be god. After leaving I knew that wasn't true, and I figured god no longer loved me for what I did.

Anya was so encouraging and kind. She told me that is it 100% untrue, and that god does love me. That he put me through that experience for a reason and it only made me stronger.

Then she offered to do some bible study lessons with me so I could learn things the right way and start to feel a little bit better about my situation. And of course, I agreed. I was desperate to redeem myself and make friends again.

So I started going to this bible study once a week. Which turned to twice a week. Which turned into me going to some woman's house to have lessons. We'll call this woman Cara.

Cara was from Korea and so was her husband, they were extremely nice and welcomed me into their home. They would feed me ramen and cool snacks, and I honestly felt like a part of their family. There were lots of people in this bible study too and I made a ton of friends.

So fast forward, I had been studying the bible with them for about a year now. And nothing crazy, I was learning about the parables of the bible and the meanings of all those things in the bible that make no sense. It was very informative and interesting but nothing outlandish.

They sit us down for this big "reveal" about who the 2nd coming of Jesus is. Now they hyped it up so much and they told us that we can't judge this person no matter what. This whole time I thought it was going to be someone crazy like Kanye West or something. But no, it was an old Korean man.

He seemed unassuming enough? I had never heard of him so I didn't know why they made such a big deal out of it.

Now at this point, you are probably thinking, "Why the hell would you fall for this again?" Listen, trust me I was frustrated with myself when I left but you have to understand these people love-bombed me when I had no one. They became my family when I had none. They lied to me for an entire year so I'd trust them and get close to them before they revealed who they really were.

And they were a church called Shincheonji.

And I had no problem accepting this because these people had been my family and my best friends for an entire year. They'd feed me, watch movies with me, do anything to help me out. So I trusted them wholeheartedly. But really I was just being brainwashed.

So after I found out that they were Shincheonji they put me in their group for advanced students. And I'd begin studying multiple times a week at Cara's house and Anya was always there too. I would join the twice-weekly sermons via zoom as well. Where one of the Korean tribe leaders would give a sermon about something. I was in the Mathias tribe by the way, though that doesn't really matter.

I would do so so much with them, we even all went on a road trip to Houston where the other branch was. They even got me a birthday cake and surprised me for my birthday too. It was honestly great, and I loved them a lot.

We were basically encouraged to recruit as many people as we can because if we don't they will go to hell. They put so much pressure on us for this. They'd say things like, "Don't you want to save them?" And I am a very empathetic person so I felt like omg I want to save everyone! But on the other hand, ever since I joined Shincheonji my anxiety and depression went through the roof. The pressure to save the entire world is a lot for a 21-year-old girl. So I never recruited anyone myself because I didn't want them to have to struggle with the same mental health issues I did when I joined.

I also had some physical health issues arise as well. Their teachings would always preach how "The word of god is all the food we need." How spiritual food was more important than physical food. And that really stuck with me, especially when I got food poisoning and I couldn't eat solid food for two weeks. Something about not eating made me feel good. Like I didn't even need food because the word of god was enough, so why not just not eat at all? Not eating felt like the only thing I could control, so I clung to it. And I became anorexic. Being with Shinchenji was the only time I was ever considered underweight.

Anyway, I have so many crazy stories to tell about my time with them but I'll save those for another day.

I had been with them for about two and a half years before I started to question things.

We got a new teacher from Korea to replace Cara because she was going to have a baby. And this new teacher was a lot different and a lot less loving and nurturing than Cara had been.

She had said some things that I didn't agree with, and it started putting some doubt in my mind.

Ok so, on a side note I used to work at the library at my school doing data entry in the basement. And I would listen to podcasts a lot throughout the day as I did my work.

One day I found an interesting podcast about cults, where the host would bring cult victims onto the show and they'd tell their story. Well I was listening to an episode about the Moonies and I thought to myself, "Huh, they sound very similar to Shincheonji in some ways..."

But I knew I could not think such thoughts and that if I did any research then the devil would poison me through the internet. And I needed to strengthen my spirit for even thinking of such a thing.

So I went to reddit, and I found a subreddit called r/Shincheonji. I was like, "Oh yes! Now I can talk to other Shincheonji members and we can strengthen each other's faith!"

But it wasn't a subreddit for believers. It was a subreddit for ex-members and people who were against Shincheonji.

And at this point, I had already seen enough to plant that seed of doubt in me. I read more and more even though Shincheonji warned me I'd be poisoned if I ever researched them. But I couldn't stop myself.

I went through so much inner turmoil, you guys have no idea. My reality was crumbling so hard and I felt like my world was ending. It's hard to explain, but I was so indoctrinated and brainwashed by this point. This really ruined me.

I had to mourn the loss of all of the family and friends I gained these past years. I would cry almost every night because I missed them, and it was so hard to accept that they never truly loved me at all. To be honest, I still think about some of them to this day and I hope they got out and found peace in their lives.

No one in my life had known I was a part of Shincheonji. My closest friends nor my family, who had slowly started talking to me again. But I had to tell someone so I told my childhood best friend, we'll call him Blaine.

I got in a Playstation party with Blaine and I just cried. I cried so so much, and he was so confused. But eventually, I told him everything. And he was really supportive and gave me no judgment at all.

My main issue was, how could I leave? I have quite literally been living a double life this entire time and not having that scared the shit out of me. But Blaine advised me to cut them off completely and just leave without saying anything. Because his concern was that if they got the chance to talk to me, they would most certainly be able to pull me back in. And I know them well enough to know this is true. So that's exactly what I did, I left and went cold turkey. I even went as far as changing my work schedule too.

And here's where things get creepy.

I hadn't spoken to them for about a week now, and I'm at work. I'm working as usual in the basement on the computers and low and behold, three girls walk in. Girls from my cult, girls that I was close to.

Now students aren't allowed to just waltz into this room so they had some big balls to do that. But the weird thing was, I had completely changed my schedule and I was working on a day I normally had off. They should have had no idea I was there.

But here they were, holding a large cup of boba from my favorite place. And in my favorite flavor too, winter milk cap with mango popping bubbles.

They came up to me and said, "Hey girl, we noticed you haven't been coming to worship lately. Is everything alright?"

I said, "Oh uh yeah everything's fine! I've just been super busy with work and a ton of projects for class..."

"Ok, well we got this for you," they handed me the boba, "We were hoping to talk to you. We can wait for you outside and talk to you when you get off."

I started panicking so I said, "My mom is actually picking me up as soon as I get off so I won't be able to, I'm sorry! Maybe another time though, I'll text you."

They were convinced by my response so they left. And boy did I RUN so fucking fast after I got off work. I even called Blaine so he could talk to me in case they came after me, but luckily they didn't and I got home ok.

He started yelling at me for drinking the boba saying, "YOU IDIOT! THEY PROBABLY POISONED IT!"

But hey, free boba is free boba.

Anyway, after that event I knew I had to text that girl and tell her I was deciding to leave Shinchenji because I didn't want them to show up at my job again or follow me around.

So I texted her, trying to be as nice as possible and explain to her that I just couldn't do it anymore. I told her how this affected my mental health and my physical health. How I developed an eating disorder from being in Shincheonji too.

Her response was really rude and condescending. She said my mental health issues and my eating disorder were my fault and the work of satan trying to blame them. She told me that once I leave I can never be accepted into heaven, that I'm damning myself to hell as well as all of my family members. I'll be honest, she made me feel incredibly guilty and selfish for leaving. Their teachings were still ingrained in me. But I knew that I could never return after everything, so I blocked her and never spoke to her again.

Oh yeah and that book the professor was writing in the beginning, that wasn't real and she wasn't a professor. It was just a ruse to lure students in.

I will admit I could never get their teachings out of my head. And to this day, even though I know they were wrong, a part of me believes I am going to hell for what I did and all of my family will suffer because of me. So now I can't even look at a bible, and I no longer consider myself religious.

And after this experience, I reached out to that cult podcast that helped me realize I was also in a cult, and I got an episode of my own where I got to tell my story.

So yeah haha that's my story!

Today only my close friends know, and I never told my parents. They still have no idea and honestly, I don't know if I will ever tell them.

I'm still really plagued by a lot of things they did, and my worldview has never been the same. My life has never been the same. But I've been cult free for about 2 years now so I'm just taking it one day at a time.

I'm sorry this was so long. But if you read the whole thing I want to say thank you, from the bottom of my heart, for reading my story. And if you are a college student, please be careful because cults like this are rampant on college campuses, especially in the U.S.

After leaving the cult, I needed something to obsess over, something to make me feel normal. And that was Gyutaro! And I gotta say, obsessing over him is much healthier than obsessing over the teachings of a cult.

Anyway, I want you all to know that this blog has been an escape for me and helped me to feel normal again after this experience. And I don't need a cult to make me feel loved anymore. Because I have all of you :)

#𝐑𝐞𝐩𝐥𝐢𝐞𝐬 ʚ♡ɞ #𝐑𝐚𝐦𝐛𝐥𝐞𝐬 ʚ♡ɞ #my experiences

[atlasblue85]

ok i haven't made a person post in 5000 years but im losing my mind thinking about this and i can't contain it and i haven't seen anyone else talking about it

in the most recent episode when Armand and Louis are talking in Louis's apartment and Louis gets frustrated about only being able to make fire when he's angry, Armand tells him "I try and find the vulnerability within the object" and like that's just it, isn't it? that's his whole fucking character right there in one kind of throw away line.

And if you take that and apply it to his observation from earlier in the season, "that boy we met in San Francisco, he's still in there and we can find him" like!!!!! it's the same fucking picture your honor

All Armand does is look for the vulnerability and exploit it. He's had the thoughts of changing the coven but he could never say them himself so he lets Lestat come in and do it. "You brought him there so he could destroy it." Armand never gets his hands dirty, he just finds the vulnerability and exploits it by letting something else do the dirty work for him whether it be Lestat or Louis or fire. When the coven goes on the hunt he finds this party full of wealthy people living in luxury while the majority of the country is in post war poverty and he uses that to justify them being killed but also exploits the sentiments of the coven, knowing they'll do the work for him. He doesn't even go inside, barely even glances as they destroy the place.

But ALSO in this scene, he and Louis smoke their cigarettes outside and they both use lighters to light them. Armand isn't showing his full hand yet, he's drawn to Louis but doesn't fully trust him. He doesn't show him that until later, when he's more sure Louis feels the same about him. I think there's another scene then when Louis uses a lighter but Armand doesn't.

Then later we see that scene with Louis struggling with the candle and he says the thing about only being able to do it when he's angry, and then we only see him do it when he's angry. There he's angry because Lestat is invading again, but also angry that he's still being pressured about the coven. When he sets his pictures on fire he's angry about the rejection from the art dealer and then angry at Claudia.

Then there's the final scene on the bench in the rain. He's just allowed Lestat to disappear as Armand approaches, after telling Lestat he's going to break things off with Armand. Maybe it's a lie just for Lestat but I think there's at least some truth to it, some part of him that's going to, but then Armand starts confiding in him, and he realizes he has him completely.

"I used to be real good at running things" followed immediately by "I'm a little wet" he doesn't even ask Armand to put up the umbrella Armand just does it because he told Louis about his past and now Louis has found his vulnerable point and knows how to use it. So then he hands Armand a cigarette and Armand tells him he wants him and Louis calls him Arun and Armans calls him Maitre. He knows it's over now, he's not angry he's in complete and total control so he lights Armand's cigarette first and then his own, and then throws his lighter away.

THAT is the moment so far, to me, where Louis comes into his own as a vampire. Here's this 500 year old master manipulator and Louis has him wrapped around his finger. Find the vulnerability within the fucking object. God.

#iwtv #interview with the vampire #iwtv spoilers #louis de pointe du lac #god the rain bench scene all of it from Louis and Lestat walking right to the end is so exquisitely crafted #but ALSO god when claudia tells Louis love makes him stupid #because she says armand threatened her with the truth about lestat and louis says that doesn't sound like him #surely he knows armand is capable of that but what he means is direct threats like that don't sound like armand #but that's when he realizes this is his moment because he realizes armand is scared #armand is cool and collected and doesn't resort to direct threats except now the coven is falling apart #and louis can step in and take his control and it starts immediately after claudia leaves when he asks lestat shall we hunt #god GOD this show

[slitherpunk]

this may be a silly question

how do I become a girl when I am very much not one

oh! oh how do i phrase this in a way that's believable and succinct...

basically.. you can decide yourself!! if you want to be a girl.. you can just be a girl. contrary to what society demands, there isn't really a rulebook or guideline. you don't have to adhere to what society believes a girl is. being a girl is something in your heart and mind!!

i urge you to spend time with other trans people. learn about their experiences, share your own. there's a lot of different steps you can take to help you feel more girl, if you decide it's for you! i think one of the most common steps other trans people take (other than a change of wardrobe) is hormone replacement therapy. it's something that takes time and patience, but for many it's what helps them feel more comfortable. if you feel comfortable with what the effects of that is, it might be the sort of thing for you.

i'm just a silly girl online. so, i'm not sure how much help i could really bring to a conversation like this. but!! there was a time i too thought that i couldn't ever be a girl. i felt like my body and face weren't the right shape or my hair doesn't work right or i'd just not pass or whatever. but the truth is, girls can be any shape. boys can be any shape. when it comes to biology, some shapes are just more likely than others depending on how you're born. my little secret for self confidence is knowing that: 1. im a woman, 2. i love women. 3. i love myself!

basically.. well... believe in yourself!!! i know it can be tricky, but!! you can believe you're a girl and love yourself for it!!

#i don't know how helpful you may find this... #but!!! i feel like.. this sort of sums up the sort of exploring i've done in a few sentences..

[evansboyfriend]

fwiw i dont think buddie not going canon makes the ship any less valid. as long as i have been in fandom i haven't had a single canon ship before i found bucktommy, but that never stopped me! that never stopped any of us! there's still people writing stevebucky fanfic making edits drawing fanart in the year of our lord 20-fucking-24. same for merthur. same for that one ship with the guy that got sent to superhell. there's more examples we can add here im sure.

fuck what canon says, if you think two people are in love and destined to be together then they are, full stop. since when do we give real weight to what tptb decide? and for that matter, since when is "my ship is canon so its better than yours" a valid argument.

and specifically about buddie vs bucktommy, it's not about what's canon. it's about the narrative, where's this story going with these characters, what would make a satisfying arc and a happy ending. right now, to me, that's bucktommy. it makes sense. it's good. who knows how that might change in s8? (or s9, god willing, pretty please). who knows where the story might go. i want it to continue in this positive way. when i say bucktommy endgame, it means i want evan buckley to be happy with his hot pilot boyfriend. i want tommy kinard to be happy with his golden retriever boyfriend. but if canon doesn't go that way? i'll be on ao3 writing a dozen fics to fix it because that's what we do in fandom.

and most importantly, because it needs to be said, it has the seal of approval from actual mlm which. its kind of a big deal imo. not to "if the genders were reversed" bla bla but if all this vitriol and hate was coming from a majority-male-occupied space targeting a canon, well set up, well written f/f ship...... lets just say you would see me on the news.

#emma.txt #my 2 cents! #i love buddie i love bucktommy i love buddietommy byeeee #buddie #bucktommy

[usermarquez]

hi!! not sure who to ask but im a new motogp fan and trying to understand the honda history...why did the bike get so bad? online is saying mm93 sent engineers down the wrong path, or were just outdeveloped bc they were lax, or etc etc, but i cant tell how biased of an opinion that is from netizens and it's hard to dig for an objective answer. as resident repsol honda connoisseur, do you have any thoughts on this? what were/are honda's problems (whether directly on the bike, or in terms of team management, or inner politics, etc.)? when did it really start? is there hope for joan and luca to develop the bike well and fight for titles again? sorry for so many qs! and tyia even if it's just pointing me to the right direction of where to look for answers :))

Hi !!! Welcome to MotoGP :))) Okay, so Honda, Honda..... Where do I begin.....

It's really a series of all those things you mentioned. If people were paying attention, we have been having problems since as early as 2016 (!). So, really, a lot of people saw this coming. I recommend this article if you want a more articulate explanation, but basically, I would break it down into a few points here:

Marc and Dani were talented enough to mask those bikes' deficiencies and put them up there in places they didn't actually belong. And if it weren't broken enough, why fix it, right? Just managed some temporary solutions to at least keep the bike up and running and competitive enough until it isn't.

About Marc leading the team down the wrong path.... I wouldn't say it was intentional, but Marc was ridiculously insane on his own, and there were a lot of comments from other Honda riders about how his data makes no sense at all. But, he also was the number 1 rider at that moment, so it wouldn't be surprising that his input carried the most weight. And, really, Honda wouldn't be the first team in motorsports to build a bike or a car around their number 1 guy. So, when Marc's injury happened, well, all of the bike's flaws were exposed.

Honda and its engineers are really a bunch of old-school people (and I say that in the most respectful way possible). They are very principled in the way they build their bike. So, they were reluctant to change and adopt newer technology they didn't invent. In 2016, they were the last one to adopt a counter-rotating crankshaft. And don't get me started with aerodynamics. If they could, they would never put those aeros on their bikes. So, yes, they were probably the last ones adopting aeros.

Covid-19. This is probably a bit 50/50, considering every other team is affected by it. But since, most, if not all, of Honda engineers are based in Japan, it was really a major obstacle in development.

#i remember reading that puig wanted to poach engineers from ducati and all that #but honda rejected it saying that they wouldn't be told how to build a bike by europeans.... but yeah...... i can't remember where i read i #so take that with a grain of salt #💌💌💌

[arthursdolly]

𝒔𝒕𝒂𝒓 𝒐𝒇 𝒕𝒉𝒆 𝒔𝒉𝒐𝒘 (𝒂𝒓𝒕𝒉𝒖𝒓 𝒎𝒐𝒓𝒈𝒂𝒏 𝒙 𝒉𝒚𝒑𝒆𝒓𝒇𝒆𝒎!𝒓𝒆𝒂𝒅𝒆𝒓)

𝓑𝓔𝓕𝓞𝓡𝓔 𝓨𝓞𝓤 𝓡𝓔𝓐𝓓! req by @luds69 . afab/fem!reader . hyperfem!reader . reader is a dancer . all fluffy and cute

god, arthur hasn't felt this exhausted and stressed since... blackwater? it was now getting to him, to say the least. getting away from lawmen, the pinktertons, and even trying to process that some of the members have died, it was rough. well, it always has been. this line of work wasn't for the weak. this a tough work.

he had to get out from camp for a bit. just a while, to clear his head. and this night, he did just that. he'll go through saint denis again.

he or dutch missed anything while the two of them were scoping around, anyway. arthur was just trotting through the warmly lit city. he didn't like it that much, meant more lawmen he had to be aware of, but it's not a problem. unless someone starts on him or realises who he is. he just had to keep a low profile. he had to be careful.

what felt like hoours of basically distracting himself with his outlaw life, a poster caught his eye. it was a theatre poster, nothing big but he was curious.

a poster of dancing girls in théâtre râleur. his eyes gazed at every girl, and yet his heart skipped a beat once he saw urs. u were so pretty, pretty as a picture. he thought u should even be the star of the show. goddamn, the fool that he was. it wasn't like him, and yet here is.. walking to the theatre. hoping that he'd see u. even for a glimpse...

there u were. having the absolute time of ur life as u danced around with the other girls, with the most genuine and beautiful smile that graced ur lips. he kept his gaze on u, not like his attention would be rippes from u anyway. and u couldn't see him anyway due to the spotlight, giving the people what they want as entertainment.

once u and the girls finished, u ended it with blowing a kiss to the audience. which got all the right reactions of whistles and cheering.

𝆤࿚࿙𝆤𝆤࿚۶ৎ𝆤࿙𝆤𖹭𝆤࿚𝆤۶ৎ࿙𝆤𝆤࿚࿙𝆤

u were sitting in front of a vanity mirror, re-adjusting ur makeup before leave to go home. ur brain kept thinking back to that certain cowboy u saw in the audience. he looked so handsome... the way his gaze remained on u! oh, ur heart could explode at the thought. making u feel all funny inside.

“hey, miss? jus' wanted t'tell ya that i liked yer show the night.” u heard behind the door. a sort of.. rough tone.

it was like the universe knew ur thoughts perhaps? maybe? “oh thank ya, mister. means a lot.” u reply in that giggly tone of urs. u have lacked a little of company for a while so its not wrong if u just- “do you... wanna come in 'nd talk more?” and then silence occurred for a few moments. “... sure. i don't mind.”

and here u are. laughing and talking with a man in ur dressing room. arthur morgan, he was. u didn't see many people like him before. he looked like he lives out there instead of being cooped up in a city like u. he was like a breath of fresh air. “ive never met a man like ya, mister morgan.”

"yeah?" he's never met anyone like u either. the way ur all dressed in pink frills, pink lace...

"yeah... your different to other men that have come to see me after shows. i like talkin' to you.” u say softly before moving ur hair out ur face, adjusting the pink bow in ur hair. he looked away for a moment. he wasn't the type to handle compliments well. “ah, thank ya, miss [name]. it ain't nothin'.” he replied, dismissing his actions. “would you come to my next show? it's tomorrow night.. i'd like to see ya again.”

arthur wanted to. he so wanted to see u again. again and again. but his life... isn't so easy. it's more rough, tough, and life threatening. he doesn't want u to know about it. he can't have u wrapped up in that. he should say no- “'course. yer good at what u do.” he'd go to hell and back if it meant he'd see that pretty smile of urs again.

“hope im not being too forward, but... you're quite the handsome man.” did he hear u right? did u just call him handsome? no.. no way u did. he looked down, hising his flustered face. “ah... ain't nothin' of me. yer the pretty one, miss [name].” god, what was he saying? he could die of embarrassment of right now... “thank you, mr morgan.”

good lord, u were really the most beautiful lady he's ever seen.

the start of a new friendship, maybe?

#ᯓ🎀 reqs #red dead redemption 2 #rdr2 #arthur morgan #arthur morgan x reader #arthur morgan rdr2 #arthur morgan x you #arthur morgan x female reader #arthur morgan x hyperfem!reader

[fictionfixations]

wasnt planning on making a post but im doing it now so uh

helluva boss the full moon episode (i dont remember which one it was. s2 ep8?? i think? idk)

(i just realized i said 'hazbin hotel' my bad. if i make a mistake like that uhh oops)

and yall are stolas defenders so im gonna talk about blitz (dont get me wrong i love both of them)

let me talk about it

(i dont know if i make any sense so oops)

notice how during stolas' proposal basically (cant help but see the gem as like a wedding ring ngl) blitz's eyes are shining because he cant help but hope

and then when he goes 'ohh youre just fucking with me right? this is some roleplay shit right?'

because its so incomprehensible in his mind that this is what he truly thinks it is.

anyway people have explained before about how stolas then proceeds to shut him out like being faced with blitz being in denial about it and taking it as a rejection

meanwhile blitz is like 'wait a second you were SERIOUS?'

and then hes like 'wAIT' because hes trying to understand. to comprehend that stolas was being real about it. that someone wants him. but then he doesnt have the time to think about it because stolas is leaving and he doesnt want stolas to leave

and yknow how blitz is hes kind of an asshole so then he defaults to being angry and frustrated. (i wonder if he feels like he'll only be heard by being angry and yelling. or if by being angry, by shutting people out and being the one to break it off makes blitz feel more in control. anyway-)

no but listen before this hes like 'what the fuck?' stolas leaves, blitz follows him in silence still in that confused and hella surprised state because it was so unexpected while stolas' talking about stuff

hes silent for awhile (probably trying to make sense of it while half-listening)

and then stolas is like 'thats enough to know what this is' and THEN blitz gets all angry and yelling

and inside hes just like. ..thats it? but its like. stolas is going to leave. and he doesnt want him to go. but he also doesnt know how to express that (especially with stolas having completely shut him out at this point in his own feeling, so set in the rejection without realizing that blitz hadnt actually rejected it. had been in disbelief instead of an actual no. and i get why he didnt stay to continue the conversation it just. sucks. so bad.)

("Can I get a fucking minute to think" got stuck in my head) and then blitz gets angry and blames stolas because thats whose infront of him. someone he can yell at and get angry which is so much easier then trying to decipher his feelings, or stolas' feelings. to try to understand. to be vulnerable especially in front of someone who he may like but its also complicated considering the power imbalance, or how all royals are asses so surely stolas cant be different, how its just a transactional relationship and nothing serious.

hes also saying things he doesnt necessarily mean meanwhile stolas is taking it to heart like 'this is how he really feels about me' when that isnt true (blitz is kind of just making excuses. and instead of being 'set free' as it might seem to stolas, it seems to him like stolas is just. throwing him away. getting bored of him. hes ignoring the love confession stolas just says 'i want you' PLEASE be more blunt about it oh my god theres so many wordings that i have an issue with from stolas im going to be honest.

like LISTEn he goes 'i want you'. blitz is in denial. stolas then starts to acceptance/resignment and blitz is like 'wait a fucking second'

so blitz who thought they were going to have a sexy time. suddenly gets hit with feelings out of the blue. and he doesnt do good with those. and its so incomprehensible that he doesnt believe it. and then basically stolas rejects him right after with blitz realizing 'wait you were serious?' and then gets angry like 'what? no, it can't be over. ..well fuck YOU then!' like. he kind of feels betrayed? like 'how dare you spring this feelings bullshit on me (and then LEAVE)'

also is he projecting? has he experienced something??? and i really dont think hes had the chance to properly process so he's just shoving it aside and focusing on the then and now. which is stolas leaving and dismissing him which blitz takes offence to and accuses him of being like all the other royal assholes. because he doesnt know how else to communicate. this is not to say that he isnt an asshole because he is, but id like to say that theres reasons to all of it.

ALSO ALSO. i think its less that blitz believes stolas to be like that but (besides reasoning to himself that stolas is just like all the others so he can distance himself and cut ties even if it hurts) that its because thats the position stolas has and so its what he turns to for insults. i had more to say about this part but i already forgot, oops.

and ive seen people talk about this too but stolas conversing through words while blitz converses through feelings. so its like for blitz youre not meant to listen to what hes saying but to listen to the feeling? meanwhile stolas being through words (thus probably feeling like 'i want you' is explanation enough while blitz needs more clarification then that)

and potentially with stolas being all horny around him cause haha my crush is here and hes hot and i love him and aaah making blitz think stolas just wants him because of what he can offer? (and maybe if hes never faced love that its unrecognizable? especially towards him?) a thought to go onto another time

also another thought to go down. you think after blitz realizes hes serious that hes trying to coomunicate. with the 'can i get a FUCKING moment to think'

and then his mouth goes on autopilot and starts insulting him trying to stall trying to get him to stay even if its with hurtful words because thats what hes used to thats what he does (also defaulting to anger)

just like yelling at him trying to get stolas to just stop walking. to stop turning his back on him.

and hes just running on anger at that point because he didnt get too long to process that stolas was serious so a part of him still thinks that its just. not real? and hes running off of that because again its so much easier than being vulnerable with someone

blitz has. probably been very trustful of someone, only for them to betray him and hurt him and use him so ahdishfu

also probably blitz's attempt at trying to get them to actually communicate

to get him to stop. stand still. stop leaving. stop moving. just turn around, face him, and talk. to get all their feelings out and explain. to clarify.

maybe he even wants stolas to get angry because that's what he's used to. wants him to get angry so they can get it all out there. maybe wants a part of him to feel vindicated of 'he was right, stolas was an asshole', the part of him that doesnt want to be close to anyone in fear of being hurt

..and then stolas doesn't react how blitz expects him to. (because they DONT understand each other at all! they don't interact all that much outside of sex, and stolas offering it to blitz is rejected)

blitz realizing 'wait... shit...' to wheres hes immediately brought out of his anger by stolas' words

'goodbye'

also it almost sounds like blitz is saying 'Stolas, wait I'm s-' as in 'im sorry'

realizing it wasnt going as he expected it to. that stolas really was serious. that stolas was hurt. that stolas was going to actually leave and blitz. doesnt. want that to happen. so then he. tries.

and then goes 'what the fuck' when he appears outside

and honestly sometimes a lot of relationships need space from each other to realize who they are without them. and also to realize how much they care about the other, yknow? to understand their feelings without anything else complicated thrown into the mix.

listen: blitz could go back into complete denial like 'no fuck stolas actually-'. realize he misses stolas, actually.

cause i feel like he really did try at the end only to get shut out (its a really complicated situation because ive also seen people talk about how blitz yelling could remind stolas of stella(?) i think the person he divorced)

and it could be seen as rejection of him trying to do feelings talk. which he could double down on his 'no one can love you, itll only bring you hurt' idea, or bringing other people hurt (as in his mother's death or fizz getting hurt)

but i feel like he also needs time to just realize things. to think things through instead of being faced with immediately having to respond because theyre talking face to face. immediately having to respond because stolas is leaving and if he doesnt say anything then that'll be it.

its complicated. honestly, though. i feel like its for the better for them to have this break. to rebuild their life without the transactional relationship. i just wonder how they'll get back together (daughter plotting time? maybe?)

i wonder if hell has therapy. (...but also. what if the therapists were corrupt and didnt hold any form of patient privacy???)

hh

anyway i dont know if i made sense. ive just had these thoughts stuck in my head so ive just been spewing out all the ones related to this so i could stop thinking about it

a;sp a;sp o hjavej oirhfrj

holyfuck ok

also also i have more to add

okay so you know stolas' line of 'you have no obligation to touch me or to bed me'

you know what that sounded like with loona having told blitz 'hes getting tired of you'

it sounded like stolas didnt want blitz to basically touch him anymore. which is probably blitz' interpretation of it and thus his anger of 'you think you can do this shit just because im an imp and youre a royal?' or whatever (hes not even touching the fact of the gem. its 'am i not good enough? i can do better!' because the book was the only reason in his mind why he could interact with stolas. and just. aghhh)

any more thoughts im shoving here in the future before i get more brainrot over this

#helluva boss #thoughts #helluva boss spoilers #helluva boss full moon #full moon episode #helluva boss the full moon #hb spoilers #blitz #blitzø #blitzo #helluva boss blitz #helluva blitz #stolas #helluva boss season 2 #stolas goetia

[connorsblog]

you're gone, but im still here. | c.g

genre : angst

summary : after carls death, you feel lost.

warning : hallucinations & semi-graphic gore description

do not continue reading if you have not seen 8x09 !! spoilers ahead

i sat infront of carls grave, the mere dirt pile was all rick and michonne could do while alexandria was burning down to the ground.

a pang went to my heart as i ran my fingers over the ashed dirt. it was a mix of grey and brown now, just reminding me all over again how my home burnt down.

"i shouldve been able to save you," my voice cracks as i attempt to talk to carl. it doesnt work very well.

i try to talk again, but all that comes out is a cracked "sorry." it wasnt enough and i knew it.

i tried to focus on the background sounds, but the soft chirps of the cicadas didn't suffice for carls voice.

i tried to imagine him there, sitting next to me in silence and holding my head on his shoulder.

i guess i imagined too far, as when i turned around he was there. in 3d.

"carl?" my voice came out soft and broken.

"you don't have to be sad," he got straight to his point. almost like he was about to disappear any moment.

"i died to save someone. he's going to be good for the community," he continued, "his name is siddiq."

i guess i forgot about him, since he hadnt been here very long. i had seen him maybe once, maybe twice?

"it's not your fault i died," not even allowing me to talk before starting up again, "it's not your fault."

he kept saying that but some part of me, buried deep inside of me, thought otherwise.

"it is my fault," came out without my consent. i didnt want to speak, i wanted to relish in his voice and presence until i couldnt see his face anymore.

he gripped my wrist. some part of me wanted to rip away and continue to believe he was dead. but he was right there, in front of my face.

i began to talk again, but as quick as he came he left. nothing was there besides the dirt mound.

i heard ricks gravely voice from somewhere behind me. i ignored it, hoping, somehow that carl would come back.

forty-six beats of silence later, i felt a hand on my shoulder. bristly cold.

shortly after, i realized it was carl again.

i didn't speak, not that he'd let me, and waited for him to say something.

"siddiq is good people, you know," he lifts his head a bit, finally allowing me to see his gaping gunshot wound in his head. but it wasnt bleeding, just a void of flesh that was on the side of his head.

i resisted the urge to scream, that all-too-familiar pang in my heart back. plus, if i did scream.. i'd look crazy. nobody was there, right?

"you'll be okay without me," he continues. i didnt know why he continued to talk, i hadnt said anything for the past few minutes.

"are you sure?" i finally spoke up. my throat hurt from the words, they felt like lava bubbling up and threatening to blow any second.

"i'm sure," he whispered before his eye closed and he disappeared for the last time.

"i dont want to live without you. but i will anyway," i sigh out as i brush my fingers over his grave for the last time for a while. i cant mourn him for too long.

#connorsblog #carl grimes #carl grimes x gn!reader #carl grimes x reader #the walking dead #twd imagines

[neo404]

Nick x Drag Queen reader

How you guys meet:

"Hey, Lovy (your stage name). Boss told me there is a birthday boy today, make sure to do your special song for him. I’ll leave you the name here." My friend and coworker leave a note on my desk as I keep putting make up on my face.

"All right, thanks."

"Have a great show." they pat me on the shoulder and leave.

The show was great, all of the Queens were amazing as usual. The last and longest act was mine, since I love to talk and Im friends with the bar owner.

My music plays and I get on stage with a bright smile, some people clap, some people scream. I dance until my first two songs end. Then I grab the microphone that’s on stage.

"A little manager told me; someone is having his birthday todaaaaay." I say scanning the room for the birthday boy. "Where are you? raise your hand to receive your gift." I see a guy slowly raise his hand, brunet hair and surrounded of friends who made fun of him for his red cheeks, perfect, my favorite kind of show. "Ohhh, I see you. I’m coming baby." I walk down the stage and to his table, the "birthday" music started to play, it’s just a song we always play on birthdays and the Queen on stage will dance for whoever is celebrating that day.

I stand in front of him and I see him gulp at my sigh, he tries to meet my eyes but is too shy to do it. "What’s your name?"

"I-... Nick."

I put the microphone close to my lips again. "Everyone give an applause for Nick." The bar claps, and shouts and whistles for his, he giggles. I leave the mic on his table and I start my performance. I dance for him and him alone.

When the music stops, I was sitting on his right leg, microphone on my hand. His friends holding back laughter and recording us, mostly his red face.

"Happy birthday, Nick." I said and stood up to walk to stage. "Oh." I turn around., "If you want to buy me a drink, my shift ends in 1 hour." I wink at him, the lights turn off and when they turn back on, I was on stage again, my next two songs playing on the speakers.

your shift ends.

"AHHHH, my knees hurt. Why did I choose floor work as a statement for me????" one of my coworkers complain.

"Girl, ask me. My neck hurts, I regret buying those big ass wigs." someone else says.

"Why are you so distracted??" the first one said.

"Nothing."

"Cute birthday boy."

"SHHHH. No, it’s not that, god." I roll my eyes. "See you tomorrow." I wave at them.

"Byeeee, tell us how your date goes." I roll my eyes at this and go outside, hopping that he stayed to buy me a drink.

The manager was standing outside the changing room.

"Wh-"

"Birthday boy wants to buy you a drink. Is he cool or creep? do i kick him out? do I call security?"

"Its fine Ali. I told him he could. thanks for worrying." I kiss their cheek and walk to the main room, searching for him, I can see him... Nick, I can see Nick standing close to the bar nervously looking back to his friends who hyped him up.

I walk to him and stand beside him, leaning into the bar.

"Hi, Larry. Can you make me a margarita?" I turn around and look at him. "Waiting for someone?"

"Oh, hi. I didn’t see you coming." He nervously adjusts his shirt and takes a sip of his water. "What drink do you want?"

"Already ordered."

"Oh... great. Uh, great show. I loved that thing you did on stage when you stood on a chair and all that thing."

"Thanks, Nick."

"How do you know my name??" he seems very nervous. How cute.

"You told me."

"RIGHT! I forgot, how embarrassing." his cheeks light up again.

"You are cute."

"Uh?"

"You are cute, Nick."

After long hours of talking and a quick exchange of numbers, you and Nick start to become closer and closer every time you guys hang out.

He loves to go to your shows, alone or with his friends.

Once the two of you start dating, he will show you off (more than he used to do), he will drag his friends to see you perform, he will post your reels or posts on his stories, he will take millions of pictures and videos of you performing (in everyone video you can hear him scream).

He loves to stare at you while you put your make up and wig on. He thinks you look sexy while doing it.

He will 100% let you dress him up and put make up on him.

Will go with you to buy make up or clothes.

Always wants to be the highest tip after your shows.

Fall in love with you more every time he sees you in high heels or boots.

Always reminds you how much he loves you and how amazed he is at your hard work.

Will kiss your bruised knees (if you do floor work) or massage your back and neck.

Nick will bring flowers to your performances to cheer you up.

Overall, he is the best boyfriend you could ask for.

Taglist: @freshloveforthefit @shywolfapricotfan @sturnphilia @matty-bear @thenickgirl @stvrniolvsp @paige05 @soursturniolo @miloisdone1 @teenagetrash00 @lovely-calypso @h3arts4harry @malirosee

#nick sturniolo x reader #nick sturniolo x you #nick sturniolo x male reader #sturniolo triplets x reader #nick sturniolo smut