#but he is also drawn to Hannibal because Hannibal indulges in stuff and will is not used to that

[puppydoggraham]

Mizumono is the first time Will sees Hannibal broken like how he was. He probably didn’t expect him to be. At that point he struggled to realize that Hannibal was able to be hurt. Especially to that capacity. Will isn’t used to someone caring about him. So that coupled with the fact that he probably thought Hannibal wanting to run away with him was just another facet of his manipulation led to him being as shocked as he was. But it wasn’t manipulation. Hannibal was willing to leave then and there if it meant Will would go with him. When Hannibal stabs Will, in a sense he takes it. He doesn’t pull away. He leans into it and clutches onto Hannibal. At that moment right before Hannibal shoves the blade in, you can see the expression on his face where he realizes that Hannibal actually cares. He warned Hannibal. He gave him time to get away. He probably thought Hannibal would be gone. But he wasn’t. He wanted to wait for Will. He couldn’t just not see him again. Before leaving for Europe he gave Will a reminder of him that would be apart of his body forever as well as serve as a physical representation of the emotional agony he experienced in the kitchen.

During the scene, Hannibal talks about how he gave Will a rare gift and that he didn’t want it, which Will responds with “Didn’t I?” That’s the problem with their communication or lack thereof. They speak in metaphors and abstract ways that make it hard to understand what’s going on for the audience and between each other at times. There’s so many layers. Things get lost in translation. Will didn’t understand the extent of Hannibal’s care. He thinks every interaction he has with Will is just apart of their back and forth game. But it’s not.

Their communication is much less convoluted than usual. Which isn’t to say there’s a total absence of metaphor. But there is a much greater emphasis on the raw emotions of what both of them (especially Hannibal) are feeling. Shots linger. The camera doesn’t shy away. It makes us watch the entirety of the heartbreaking scene from when Will turns around and Hannibal is there to when Hannibal leaves and the rain washes over him.

After that, Will regrets not running away. He decides to set off to Europe. He remembers what Hannibal said. That he didn’t want his rare gift. That Hannibal let him see him and know him just for Will to take his freedom away from him. So Will takes the time to learn about Hannibal. Prove that he did actually want the rare gift. Prove that the reason he didn’t run away with Hannibal wasn’t because he genuinely wanted Hannibal locked up with his freedom taken away.

It was because he was scared and in denial. In denial of his own feelings towards Hannibal. In denial of Hannibal’s feelings towards him. Caught up in the ongoing battle of choosing restraint over indulgence. Of going along with what is socially acceptable and ‘right’ according to broader society rather than listening to his true desires which he isn’t even fully aware of with how repressed and suppressed they are. Hannibal scares him not because he’s afraid of what Hannibal would do to him. No. He’s scared for what he’ll become if he embraces his desire like Hannibal wants for him. At that point in Mizumono, Will isn’t ready to embrace anything. He defaults back to what he knows.

Finally when they reunite, what is one of the first things Will says to Hannibal?

“I wanted to understand you before I laid eyes on you again. I needed it to be clear what I was seeing.”

He didn’t understand Hannibal before. Hell, he didn’t understand himself. Despite seeing Hannibal in a way that even Hannibal acknowledged, he didn’t truly understand him. He didn’t understand Hannibal’s history or the feelings that Hannibal had for him. Through traversing Europe, Will was able to clear his head and understand Hannibal at last as well as learn to embrace the darker side of him that he has suppressed. He knows he can’t erase the past, but he wants to make up for his lack of understanding in the best way he knows how. He wants to prove that does understand through taking the time to and deconstructing the barriers that got in the way of that and his misconceptions about Hannibal.

We don’t see Will at peace often. He’s always tense. Constantly looking like he’s waiting for the other shoe to drop. However during that scene as they gaze at each other, Will has an ease about him. He can finally let his walls down and share a smile with the man he loves. There’s no pretenses between them. It’s yet another genuine moment they share. And although we know what comes next, Will was able to indulge. At least for a little while.

#hannibal #hannigram #nbc hannibal #will graham #Hannibal meta #hannibal lecter #mizumono posting #not entirely Mizumono posting bc primavera is involved but it counts #l swear to god if I think about this shit for too long I start going insane #take me back to ink master world bro Hannibal makes mecGGHHJKSKSJSJ!'n jsjsjdjdjd!!$ #this was only supposed to be a paragraph originally #I feel like a lot of will's hatred towards Hannibal is actually hatred towards himself #he is afraid of being like hannibal #he sees himself in Hannibal #so in turn he hates Hannibal that's where a lot of those mixed feelings come from #but he is also drawn to Hannibal because Hannibal indulges in stuff and will is not used to that #so he fears but also desires how Hannibal is #haven't done one of these in awhile who missed it

[ajokeformur-ray]

Matchup Request for Sherlock, Doctor Who and maybe NBC Hannibal

Hello! May I have a matchup please? That’s me:

Introverted af, social anxiety, maladaptive daydreamer, depression, compulsive thoughts (much violence), bisexual, short, good at manipulating people, drawn to dark things, justice is important to me- I think everyone who causes crime should be punished in the same way they harmed a person or animal no matter how cruel (especially them), singing and dancing is a need, loyal, Ravenclaw, touchy- i basically need hugs 24/7, animals over people, sensetive, can be soft, wary, sometimes child like, can’t calculate easy things but is like a dictionary in native language (really, people in school called me that), draws the curtains in summer, I love storms!, easily angry on the inside, polite outside-sailor language inside, reads and writes everyday, very dark humour, love is my main goal. May I add information to my ship? I just noticed and I think it could be important. So, I have my head often in the clouds. Even if I do just one task I do many careless mistakes and without someone else noticing I don’t. Though, Im a perfectionist.

hanni is selfship @murielthemagicalgirl

I feel like Sherlock would be the best match for you in this fandom. He’s intelligent enough to be able to help you - if you want help - with your social anxiety, maladaptive daydreaming and anything else you may want help with, though I feel you need to know that he’s less than tactless and will more than likely upset you a lot at first. Luckily, you have John to help you, to help Sherlock, and things will eventually get better. You have a very strong sense of justice, something which is important to Sherlock. You’re also able to connect with Sherlock on a level that few can - you know when he needs a hug, when he’s going into sensory overload, when he needs to eat and when he needs to be left alone… But he also know when you most especially need a hug, when you need help with calculations, when you need to be picked up on a simple, careless mistake which may have bigger consequences… You know so much about each other that John’s able to sleep easier at night because he knows you’re both taking care of each other and therefore, that you’re taking care of yourselves.

Ohhhhh the Eleventh Doctor would be the best regeneration for you, I think. His underlying sadness, his overt childish behaviour, his goofy attitude… He would lift you up but ground you at the same time. He would understand your anxiety and depression, having dealt with one of the two for most of his existence, and he’d always be there with a new trip to distract you. Sometimes, you don’t want a trip so he would stay in and play board games or hack into the Netflix database so that you can watch it on board the TARDIS. You’re creative and you have a dark sense of humour. The Doctor considers creativity to be proof that humans are capable of magic and so he would encourage you heavily: he’d read your stuff if you let him, he’d critique if and only if you asked, and he’d overall, encourage. And love. He’d always be cuddling, always be hugging, always be there for you no matter what. 

Hanni ❤❤❤❤ would definitely be the best one for you. He would be the best one to help you with everything. Though... the violent impulsive thoughts he would definitely encourage, to see how far he could make you go. He would question you closely about them, ask you to vividly describe them, and invite you to join him in bringing those thoughts to life. The more you resist, the more he’s gonna try, so watch yourself. <3 You’re well spoken but not so articulate when it comes to working things out, which Hannibal would probably find endearing; watching you struggle to explain yourself, and he would let you make those simple careless mistakes without correcting you because he’s curious about the consequences. Cuddles would likely be a reward system for you: if you do abc, then you get xyz. Sometimes he indulges you to keep the trust and love there, of course, because he won’t lose you. For anything.

#bbc sherlock #sherlock holmes #eleventh doctor #hannibal lecter #matchup #selfship #submission