#bl33dingpupbarks

[pupboybl33dz]

❌ ❗️FAKE SFX❗️❌

look whos back being mentally unwell again !!! its ur fave dumbass dogboy 😎😎

got such ass pics+videos tn but the angles were not working w me so this is all got ;-;

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rlly wish i could keep the sound on for these but unfortunately my smooth brain cant NOT go “ooo” “oh shit” or saying “that was shit/that was so good” after cvtting and i hate my voice so 👍 no voice/background fan noises/bl4d3 noises for now 😔😔 which sucks bc i love hearing the sound the bl4d3 makes when i cvt ~

wanted to keep going but im running out of room on my arms n thats the only place i wanna cvt rn

#bl33dingpupbarks #bl33dingpupcvts #$elf h4rm #cvtting #styr0blr #made of styro #tw s3lf harm #$h tumblr #s3lf h4rm #s3lf mutilation #$hblr #988blr #tw sui ideation

[pupboybl33dz]

fuck i want so badly to sI!ce the longest line possible down my arm

i want to hit a v3in

i want it to be a struggle to get it ti stop bl33ding

i want to need medical attention

to have to get driven to the er

none of my cvts are enough

not d33p enough

not wide enough

not enough

nothing fills the deep painful longing of wanting to d!3 anymore.

i want someone to notice to finally fucking notice and ask me if im okay

i just want to stop feeling like ive got a million pound weight on my chest

i want to be able to breathe

#bl33dingpupbarks #$elf h4rm #cvtting #styr0blr #made of styro #tw s3lf harm #$h tumblr #s3lf h4rm #s3lf mutilation #$hblr #988blr #tw sui ideation #vent #vent post

[pupboybl33dz]

❌ ❗️FAKE SFX❗️❌

tns cvtting sesh is brought to u by: the 2 panic attacks i had 4 absolutely no reason today !! i love being mentally ill !!!

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❌❗️FAKE SFX❗️❌

#$elf h4rm #cvtting #styr0blr #tw s3lf harm #$h tumblr #s3lf h4rm #s3lf mutilation #$hbir #988blr #bl33dingpupbarks #bl33dingpupcvts

[pupboybl33dz]

been on the verge of r3l4psing for this entire fucking week

havent bc ive been distracted enough but all fucking day ive felt like absolute ass

i just. i want love. so bad. i wanna be held and cuddled and kissed and. i wanna be with someone. but im so fucking screwed up i dont see how anyone could deal w me for more than five seconds even if they DID want me.

im horrible at responding to ppl and making plans and not isolating myself and i have an entire fucking breakdown when one small thing goes wrong

i feel like ive screwed myself over financially so bad that theres no possible way i can ever recover

i feel trapped n i cant do anything about it i dont know what to do i dont even know what i could do

i dont even wanna talk to any of my friends about this bc i dont want to put pressure on them or make them worry or annoy them or just anything so im pretending im fine everythings fine im rotting in my room bc i cant do anything else but its fine im fine dont worry

.

anyways covering more of my arm tn 😁

#bl33dingpupbarks #$elf h4rm #cvtting #styr0blr #made of styro #tw s3lf harm #$h tumblr #s3lf h4rm #s3lf mutilation #$hblr #988blr #tw sui ideation #vent #vent post #tw vent

[pupboybl33dz]

fuck i j had a whole post ready for tns cvtting sesh and i had to draft it rq and now it’s not showing up in my drafts 😎 if i have to recreate this goddamn post im gonna be so pissed

#vent #vent post #bl33dingpupbarks #$elf h4rm #cvtting #styr0blr #made of styro #tw s3lf harm #$h tumblr #s3lf h4rm #s3lf mutilation #$hblr #988blr #tw sui ideation

[pupboybl33dz]

finally had a few days where i actually don’t even think i thought abt cvtting or had the desire to

then my sister decides to point them out and tell me that if i’m gonna keep doing it i need to stop doing it in such visible places otherwise it’ll “freak people out”

what’s my brains totally logical response? whoops now u wanna r3l4pse !!

ur sc4rs are scary? make more !! make them even MORE visible !!!!

FUCK.

…

i actually genuinely felt like i was finally getting a little bit better.

now i’m back in a fucking pit of quicksand feeling like the only way out is to j sink deeper

#bl33dingpupbarks #$elf h4rm #cvtting #styr0blr #made of styro #tw s3lf harm #$h tumblr #s3lf h4rm #s3lf mutilation #$hblr #988blr #tw sui ideation #vent #vent post #tw vent

[pupboybl33dz]

reported ur account btw. byebye

ur a piece of shit for trying to take away safe spaces from people who are struggling. also incredibly cowardly for saying this on anon. rot ❤️

btw before anyone else gets any ideas: hey! there’s smth you can do if you don’t like seeing my acc. it’s called block me! it’ll be easier if you use braincells. hope this helps!

if not, you should try to see if you can live underwater and eat krill, you might be a jellyfish! after all, they’re brainless too 😁

#bl33dingpupbarks #bl33dingpupasks #$elf h4rm #$h tumblr #988blr #s3lf mutilation #styr0blr #$hblr #tw s3lf harm #tw sui ideation #made of styro #s3lf h4rm

[pupboybl33dz]

my fucking styr0s shrank n im so pissed abt it

i literally just put a fucking bandaid over it i wasnt even trying to close it

i’m gonna start putting tape on the outside to hold them open i swear to god

#bl33dingpupbarks #$elf h4rm #cvtting #styr0blr #made of styro #tw s3lf harm #$h tumblr #s3lf h4rm #s3lf mutilation #$hblr #988blr #tw sui ideation #vent #vent post

[pupboybl33dz]

rotting in bed for a week straight but getting lectured the second i leave my room for being lazy and irresponsible instead of. idk. asking if im fucking okay. totally the correct and normal response bc im DEFINITELY not working or looking for jobs and staying in my room and being up all night and sleeping all day JUST to be a dick

DEFINITELY not because im actively trying to not un@live myself every hour of every day

(/s)

#bl33dingpupbarks #$elf h4rm #cvtting #styr0blr #made of styro #tw s3lf harm #$h tumblr #s3lf h4rm #s3lf mutilation #$hblr #988blr #tw sui ideation

[pupboybl33dz]

i cannot fucking believe. my fucking luck.

i was fucking about to go to sleep like two hrs ago. and i ripped the top piece of my 2 DAY OLD NOSE PIERCING out when i was taking my glasses off. ripped it straight out and it flew into the void aka somewhere in my fuck ass room.

this is literally the second time i’ve gotten that side of my nose pierced n the first time it didn’t heal right and i waited fucking ages to get it repierced. why does the fucking universe think it’s funny.

anyways i wanna cvt but im too tired so im gonna sleep before i comm!t heinous crimes against humanity and/or thr0w mys3lf off the nearest bridge

#i stuck the post/bar back in but i don’t have anything else that fits and i can’t get it back in thru the inside of my nose anyway so #keeping a bandaid on it until i can do smth else #literally was trying to find it on the floor/bed for 29 minutes and then spent another like hour trying to get the bar back in my nose #i was trying to push it back in from the inside of my nose tho bc i thought it was a screw on kinda bar #it was not #wasted 20+ min on that #vent #tw vent #$elf h4rm #cvtting #styr0blr #tw s3lf harm #$h tumblr #s3lf h4rm #s3lf mutilation #$hblr #988blr #bl33dingpupbarks

[pupboybl33dz]

im so fucking mad at myself rn i actually want to jump out a 30 story window

i slept thru all of my fucking alarms and slept thru the first almost hour of my shift n then called out when they called asking if i was coming in bc i absolutely cannot fucking deal w going into work rn

i hate how bad one thing throws off my entire fucking day

…

i cant wait to cvt later

#vent #vent post #$elf h4rm #cvtting #styr0blr #tw s3lf harm #$h tumblr #s3lf h4rm #s3lf mutilation #$hblr #988blr #bl33dingpupbarks

[pupboybl33dz]

im out of w33d…n im broke so idk when i can get more…which means im abt to be unwillingly sober 24/7 til i get more….so excited (this will definitely cause me to r3l4pse <3)

#$elf h4rm #cvtting #styr0blr #tw s3lf harm #$h tumblr #s3lf h4rm #s3lf mutilation #$hblr #988blr #bl33dingpupbarks

[pupboybl33dz]

m high as fuck rn and wnt to cvt in th shower so bad but m literally abt to go to a party n dont need t worry abt MORE shit bl33ding

#$elf h4rm #cvtting #styr0blr #tw s3lf harm #$h tumblr #s3lf h4rm #s3lf mutilation #$hblr #988blr #bl33dingpupbarks

[pupboybl33dz]

might ACTUALLY go 4 the vein on my wrist even tho my sisters bday party is tmrw….im j gna wear long sleeves anyways whts the harm

def doing a decent amount tn tho :3 been waitin for this for like 3 days

#$elf h4rm #cvtting #styr0blr #tw s3lf harm #$h tumblr #s3lf h4rm #s3lf mutilation #$hblr #988blr #bl33dingpupbarks

[pupboybl33dz]

im afraid to tell anyone this but im genuinely scared that im [redacted]ing sometimes

not bc im going to un4l!ve myself but bc my health isnt the greatest esp right now

it feels stupid to think bc i feel like id know if i was or someone would know if i was or itd be more obvious or something but sometimes i get scared

idk i get scared of this and then turn around and actively want to [redacted] so i should be okay with this if it happens but idk.

#i dont want to d!3 unless its by my own terms #thats the only thing that feels right #bl33dingpupbarks #$elf h4rm #cvtting #styr0blr #made of styro #tw s3lf harm #$h tumblr #s3lf h4rm #s3lf mutilation #$hblr #988blr #tw sui ideation #vent post #vent #tw vent

[pupboybl33dz]

im so fucking tired

ive had such a fucking completely ass day today

i slept thru all my alarms and slept until almost 5pm

my piercings have been giving me so much trouble for no fucking reason esp today

ive forever fucked up my own image in making everything think im just lazy and irresponsible bc everything seems impossible and exhausting and the only things that dont are things that help me not wanna [REDACTED] myself for like five minutes

i dont know how to keep doing this

#vent #vent post #bl33dingpupbarks #$elf h4rm #cvtting #styr0blr #made of styro #tw s3lf harm #$h tumblr #s3lf h4rm #s3lf mutilation #$hblr #988blr #tw sui ideation