#beaver facts got me going god DAM
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Song Fic #3: Let’s Hurt Tonight [Brinker Hadley/Leper Lepellier]
**First post with this ship. Based on this song*^
When we came home / Worn to the bones / I told myself, “This could get rough.” / And when, when I was off, which happened a lot / You came to me and said, "that's enough"
Brinker hesitantly approached his sleeping friend. Ever since the war had ended, he had made sure to visit him as often as possible.
“Hey, Lep, it’s me,” Brinker murmured, sitting beside him.
Oh, I know this love is pain / But we can’t cut it from these veins, no
Leper opened his eyes, blinking the sleep out of them. No matter how many times Brinker was there when he woke up, he was always surprised by it. Some part of him - no matter how much he pretended that part didn’t exist - always expected that one day, Brinker would forget about him.
He was just some boy that everyone said went mad - why would Brinker care about Leper half as much as Leper cared about him?
So I’ll hit the lights and you’ll lock the doors
Brinker noticed with a bit of distaste how dark the shadows under Leper’s eyes had gotten.
“I shouldn’t have woken you,” Brinker sighed, a note of disappointment in himself. “It’s getting dark out anyway. I should probably go home - “ He went silent as Leper stood up and walked to the open bedroom door.
“There’s something I need to tell you,” Leper whispered. He closed the bedroom door and walked over to the window, slowly closing it. “Turn the lights out, please.” Brinker blinked in surprise at the strange request but complied, guessing it was another one of his friend’s - god, Brinker hated that word sometimes - stranger quirks.
We ain’t leaving this room ‘till we bust the mold
Leper took a seat beside Brinker and stayed silent for a long moment.
When he finally spoke, his voice was deadly calm.
“Being… being homosexual is illegal,” Leper said, his tone almost bitter.
“It’s always been like that,” Brinker said gently, not quite knowing where Leper was going with this.
Don’t walk away, don’t roll your eyes / They say love is pain, well, darling, let’s hurt tonight
“Not always. At one point, back in the middle ages, it was common. People didn’t think much of it. Now… did you know that men who were taken prisoner by the Germans got sent back to jail if they were gay?” Leper rambled, his eyes wide.
“Oh…” Brinker exhaled softly.
“They said I was crazy,” Leper laughed quietly.
“You aren’t crazy - “
“I’m in love with you, so I must be.”
When you came home / Worn to the bones / I told myself, “This could get rough”
Leper didn’t remember much else about that evening. In all honesty, Brinker didn’t either. Leper remembered the fact that Brinker kissed him, but past that… he wasn’t really sure. He woke early the next morning with Brinker’s possessive arms around him.
“Good morning,” Brinker mumbled, keeping his eyes closed. Leper was the first to break the peaceful silence that settled around them.
“We’ll be in trouble if people find out,” Leper said, burying his face in Brinker’s chest. “I don’t… I never meant to get anyone in trouble.”
“All you and Gene and Finny did was drag me into trouble,” he replied, laughing with no humor in his voice.
“You’re as crazy as I am.”
I know you’re feeling insane / Tell me something that I can explain
“You’re not crazy, Lepellier,” Brinker retorted, closing his eyes. Leper got up, gathering his clothes and getting dressed.
“You don’t know the things I saw,” Leper said, trembling as if the temperature in the room had dropped. Maybe it had - they both felt cold all over.
“They were visions, Lep, they weren’t real - “
“You don’t know the things I saw,” he whispered forcefully, an undercurrent of aggression in his normally passive voice.
“I don’t understand.”
“You never understand what you can’t see,” Leper said, wheeling to face Brinker. “You think that if it can’t be measured, can’t been seen by everyone, can’t be felt, that it doesn’t exist.”
“Some things have to be taken on faith-“
“Which you don’t have. I remember how you’d look during church at school. You don’t have an ounce of faith in you,” Leper accused. Brinker stood, head held high and glasses slightly askew. His hair was messy and his eyes were soft, almost pitying.
Leper didn’t want pity. He wanted someone - anyone - to have faith in him. He glared at Brinker, glared at the marks he’d left on the base of the taller boy’s throat and felt like he’d been condemned by both.
He’d fallen in love with someone so bitterly out of his reach and he despised it. He loathed that no one believed him, loathed that no one took him seriously.
I’ll hit the lights and you’ll lock the doors / Tell me all of the things you couldn’t before
“I loved you since that day freshman year,” Leper admitted, staring out the window. “That day we went on a walk and found the beaver dam. It was before you were so serious. It was before you started treating me like a piece of glass.”
Brinker frowned, remembering exactly what Leper was referring to.
It had been the day before school let out, and Leper had dragged Brinker along on his nature walk.
Clear as day, Brinker could remember the crooked grin on Leper’s face when they found the animals.
“I love you,” Brinker said quietly. “I didn’t yet, not then, but I do and I have since the night you enlisted.”
Don’t walk away, don’t roll your eyes / They say love is pain, well, darling, let’s hurt tonight / If love is pain, well, darling, let’s hurt tonight
“We’re going to spend the rest of our lives hiding,” Leper growled, clenching his fists. “You’d think there’d be something we could do, something we could…”
“I’m moving to California,” Brinker said, staring into space. “I’ve heard a lot of good things about San Francisco. They’re accepting of people like… us.”
“California?” Leper echoed.
“We can get a little apartment in the city and…” Brinker trailed off, sighing deeply. “If it’s ever allowed… We can get married.”
Leper smiled, a warm feeling of affection sweeping through his body.
“Someday,” Leper murmured. “It’ll happen. We’ll see it.”
-Mod X (Mod A has a few stories that should be up within the next couple days.)
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Let’s Read Comics! With Samantha and her Girlfriend :D
The Avengers!
Earths Mightiest Heroes!
But can even they triumph over the SINISTER FORCES of the IRON CURTAIN?
Join us as we follow them into battle against the Titanic Three!
Me: RADIOACTIVE MAN!
With the twin evils of RADIATION and CEMENT!
My Girlfriend: Titanium Man!
HE IS POWERED BY COMMUNISM
Me: Crimson Dynamo!
The supervillain with Women in Refrigerators as his origin!
My Girlfriend: And…THE SLASHER!
With the power of being…covered in knives?
Me: THIS ONE HAS IT ALL
My Girlfriend: LIES
Me: The Mighty Avengers take on the worst evil they have ever faced
JERSEY SHORE
My Girlfriend: They’re going to stop Keeping Up with the Kardashians getting another season if it’s the LAST thing they do
The narrator narrating the funeral the Avengers are attending notes that, “The Swordsman was a loser to the last moment of his life”
My Girlfriend: DON’T INSULT HIM AT HIS FUNERAL
Me: Seriously, way to go there Omniscient Narrator Dude
Your dragging a man at his funeral
My Girlfriend: The narrator is a jerk
Me: HE IS THE TRUE VILLAIN OF THIS ISSUE
Me: “Well we buried him, now let’s get on with our lives”
My Girlfriend: They can’t stand around the graveside all day long, they have stuff to do
Me: “Don’t worry team, our friend will still be dead when we get back”
Also there is Mantis, who most will know from Guardians of the Galaxy, who announces that she must soon depart as she cannot stay with a team when she feels her “Actions have dishonoured them”
Me: Of course she’s from Vietnam so like everyone from every Asian culture ever SHE IS OBSESSED WITH HONOUR
Any minute now she’s going to start talking about her ancestors
My Girlfriend: Waaaaait
Why
Is Mantis a racist stereotype here
And not a space alien?
Me: Yeah, in the comics apparently she’s NOT from space?
My Girlfriend: But in later comics she’s GREEN
Me: So was the Mandarin in the Iron Man cartoon
I think it’s how modern day Marvel deals with all its racist nonsense in its old comics
Just take all the horrifying Asian clichés and turn them green
My Girlfriend: When I think of happy places in the seventies
I always think of Vietnam as well
Me: THE HAPPIEST PLACE ON EARTH
My Girlfriend: “It is where the Swordsman felt the most happiness
After all
Nothing bad ever happens in Vietnam”
Mantis is shocked by the Avengers forgiveness but Thor assures her that since she’s sorry for recent actions she’s welcome to stay
Me: “If we kicked people out every time they nearly got us killed there’d only be about three people on this team”
My Girlfriend: Turning evil and/or making horrible mistakes that nearly get the whole team murdered is a Proud Avengers Tradition
Me: Just ask Hank or Tony
Me: SHE HAS THAT BIG SPELL-ING BEE COMING UP
My Girlfriend: Get out of this house right now
Wanda privately hopes that Vision will stay behind as well, as she does not trust that “Man Trap” (Her actual words) around the Vision
My Girlfriend: That’s some A+ writing right there
Having the only Vietnamese character in the book be trying to steal a white woman’s husband
Me: You would never be able to guess that a white man wrote this story
Vision offers to stay behind as he believes the fact that he’s frozen up in battle means he is “Losing his mind” but Tony angrily insists “Your no crazier than anyone else in this room!”
Me: That would be more comforting if the Vision was in literally any other room but this one
My Girlfriend: “Your as sane as everybody else in this room Vision!
The man who runs around shooting trick arrows at people, the guy who puts on high tech armour and pretends to be his own bodyguard”
Me: “GOD DAMN IT STOP BEAVER DAM-ING ME AROUND MY ROBOT BOYFRIEND”
My Girlfriend: Thor’s argument here is that Vision’s concerns about his mental health are far less important than VIOLENCE
Me: “Never mind your valid concerns about your own mental wellbeing Vision
WE MIGHT NEED YOU TO HIT STUFF”
My Girlfriend: HOLY SHIT
Me: When the Republican party is deciding how racist to be on any given day
They look at this comic and go “Still less racist than this OH MY GOD”
My Girlfriend: THEY DIDN’T EVEN DRAW THEM LIKE PEOPLE
Me: Also, is this guys name Buzzsaw or Slasher?
My Girlfriend: The narrator was far too busy making up oh so witty jokes about DC characters and indulging in some Old Time Racism to worry about getting characters names right
I’m more concerned about what the hell Slasher just threatened them with
Me: Your way too beeeaaaauuuuutiful Slasher
You only gonna do them dirt
He seems homicidal
Homicidal
And now it’s all oooooooover
Slasher tells them that “When a guy wears a suit covered in razor sharp blades people ought to listen to him!”
Me: There’s a lot of things someone should do when they see someone dressed in razor blades
Standing and listening to them is not one of them
My Girlfriend: Don’t be prejudiced
Slasher could have a lot of Valid Opinions about Current Events that are worth hearing
Me: I HAVE DOUBTS
My Girlfriend: Your judging a book by its cover kitten
Me: Yes because the cover is covered in razor blades
My Girlfriend: Ohhhhhhh so Slasher represents AMERICA
But the narrator assures us that “We’ll see this punk again!”
Me: PUNK!
PUNK IS NOTHING BUT DEATH
AND CRIME
AND THE RAAAAAAAAAAAAGE OF A BEEEEAAAAASSSTTTTTT
My Girlfriend: I knew you were gonna make that pun
I just
I knew
Back with the Avengers, they’ve arrived at where Swordsman’s body shall be laid to rest, “The Holy Temple of the Priests of Pama”
Vision has some doubts about this location but Mantis declares that “Even with its history of monsters and bloodshed, this place fills her with an overwhelming sense of tranquillity”
My Girlfriend: It’s one of those calm and tranquil temples full of monsters and horror
Me: “The memories of the dying agonised screams of the many MANY people who died here fill my heart with a sense of wonder and joy”
My Girlfriend: “They’ve pressure washed MOST of the bloodstains off the sacrificial stones”
Me: “I can’t think of anywhere better to lay to rest the body of someone I loved
Than an eldritch location where countless innocent people have died horribly”
My Girlfriend: I love how Hawkeye admits that he was an asshole to Swordsman the entire time he was alive and now hopes that his ghost can read his thoughts and forgive him
Me: “Even though I knew how hard your life was I treated you like shit
But now your dead I feel pretty guilty about it
So that makes it ALL OKAY”
My Girlfriend: I don’t think Clint has to worry about seeing the Swordsman again, where he’s going
Me: “We’re burying the Swordsman as a Mormon
Not because he was one
But because he HATED MORMONS and it would give him pleasure for us to bury one”
My Girlfriend: They don’t know what he believed
But since Thor is standing right there if he didn’t believe in the Norse gods he was wrong
So they might as well have Thor conduct the ceremony
Me: Legitimately seems to be what Mantis is saying here yes
Thor says a few words about how it’s easy for him to forget that people are mortal, being eternal himself
Me: I love the implication here that Thor sometimes just
FORGETS that people die
My Girlfriend: “What is everyone so sad for?
We can just go and see Hela and get him back, we do this every other week in Asgard”
Me: “What is this, a funeral?
OH
OH RIGHT”
He says that the Swordsman gave his life for love and that this was a noble reason to die, as the Avengers lay their friend to rest
It’s a solemn, serious scene
So of course it’s immediately followed by….
Me: DON’T FIST FIGHT AT A FUNERAL YOU ASSHOLES
My Girlfriend: “Well we’ve buried him
NOW LET’S GO FIND SOMEONE TO BEAT THE CRAP OUT OF”
Me: OF COURSE
WHO ELSE BUT COMMUNISTS WOULD INTERRUPT SUCH A SACRED OCCASION
My Girlfriend: They’ve terrified that poor Stereotypical Peasant so badly he’s reaching toward the fourth wall for help
Me: They’ve done him a scare
A RED SCARE
My Girlfriend: I’m leaving you
As the man flees we learn that he’s actually a criminal and a wife beater who killed his spouse…and the trio of “Villains” are trying to bring him to justice as “The Titanic Three”!
Me: I can’t believe they didn’t go with the Communist Cops
My Girlfriend: The Socialist Saviours
Me: Lenin’s Legion of Legbreakers
My Girlfriend: The Marxist Manhunters
Me: SO MANY more alliterative names than “The Titanic Three”
My Girlfriend: The Avengers!
Boldly preparing to leap to the defence of a wife beating murderer
Me: They’re not going to see domestic abusers brought to justice on THEIR watch!
My Girlfriend: “A criminal being punished?
WE’LL JUST SEE ABOUT THAT”
Me: It’s hilarious to me how badly this writer wants them to seem like the bad guys here despite the fact they’re clearly in the right
My Girlfriend: The Titanic Three or Vietnam?
Me: BOTH HONESTLY
My Girlfriend: Those evil Vietnamese, wanting to have control of their own country
Instead of just letting America roll in, invade and bomb the shit out of them
Me: The Avengers are very surprised that they’re not being greeted as liberators right now
Now get ready for the Origin of the Titanic Three!
Radioactive Man talks of his past battles with Giant Man and the Avengers and Titanium Man and Crimson Dynamo’s clashes with Iron Man
Me: “Let me explain at length things you already know”
My Girlfriend: Iron Man is standing RIGHT THERE
I don’t think he needs to be reminded of what happened when the Titanium Man and Crimson Dynamo last fought him
HE WAS THERE
Me: “As you know, our leader, the Borad…”
Me: THE SHOCKING LACK OF SECURITY IN AMERICA’S PRISONS EXPOSED
My Girlfriend: Good to know that a man who constantly emits radiation can just fuckin walk out of his cell
Me: I don’t think anyone even bothered chasing him
My Girlfriend: THEY FEARED THE POWER OF HIS CEMENT GUN
Me: Also…”Political complications”?
In the Marvel universe, Russia has canonically sent SUPERPOWERED ARMOURED MONSTERS to murder the shit out of Tony Stark to stop him building weapons for America
THAT didn’t cause “Political complications”?
My Girlfriend: I’m convinced that in the Marvel universe the Cold War wasn’t about nukes it was about each country building more and more ridiculous armoured super-beings
Me: Headcanon accepted
Me: Not to be confused with DESIRABLE ALIENS
Like Starfire or Power Girl
My Girlfriend: Not that kind of alien u goon
Iron Man gets pissed that Crimson Dynamo and Titanium Man caused the death of a woman he loved
Me: And he mourned for like
A good two or three panels
My Girlfriend: Before he went back to fucking supermodels and creeping on anything with breasts and a pulse
Me: “Do you have any idea how many barely legal “Secretaries” I had to sleep with to get over what you two did?
IT WAS A LOT”
Me: HE’S NOT GONNA LET THE LAW GET IN THE WAY OF A POINTLESS ACTION SEQUENCE
My Girlfriend: So the Avengers beating each other senseless for trivial stupid reasons DIDN’T start with Civil War
Me: Ohhhhh no
Honestly it’s the only way they communicate their feelings
My Girlfriend: That sounds healthy
Me: He’s a drunk cyborg pretending to be his own bodyguard
Nothing about Tony Stark is healthy
My Girlfriend: “CAN WE JUST MAINTAIN SOME FAÇADE OF DIGNITY”
Me: Thor would really like it if they could have just
Gotten through the funeral WITHOUT having to beat the stuffing out of each other
Thor convinces Tony that breaking international law just to beat someone up is not a great plan and they begin to depart…
Me: JESUS CLINT
TOO SOON
My Girlfriend: “He’s not gonna get any deader!”
Me: “Who’d want to come pay our respects
THE GUY’S DEAD HE’S NOT GOING TO KNOW”
My Girlfriend: Clint Barton
The soul of tact and diplomacy
With that attended to for now, they decide to attend to their OTHER reason for being there…Mantis wanting to look into her past as she believes she could be connected to the Kree and have only imagined a life in Saigon
My Girlfriend: People complain about the movies changing things but when you look at how convoluted and WEIRD their backstories are I can see why they alter Marvel characters for the big screen
Me: BLASPHEMY
My Girlfriend: Look, “Cute alien who works for Ego and met the Guardians of the Galaxy” is a LOT easier to convey in a movie-length runtime than “Okay she thought she was from Vietnam but actually the memories were fake and really she might be connected to an interstellar space empire that has been meddling in the affairs of earth for countless years”
Sometimes you have gotta STREAMLINE these things
Me: I can’t believe someone I love
Would hurt me like u just did
With ur words
They hit on the idea of contacting Captain Marvel or seeing if they can get in touch with Rick Jones to get in contact with him for him but they have no luck with that idea
Me: Not sure why they had to stay in Vietnam to do that but okay….
My Girlfriend: If they didn’t go to Vietnam how could the writer fit a lot of thinly veiled racism into the story
Me: You bring up a good point
Mantis spots what LOOKS to her like the house she grew up in but…
My Girlfriend: Or…maybe they just GOT THE WRONG HOUSE
Me: NOPE
MANTIS IS A GLITCH IN THE MATRIX
It is the only explanation ACCEPT IT ACCEPT IT NOW
My Girlfriend: I am not accepting that explanation
Me: These things happen
Reality just goes weird sometimes
It’s a thing
My Girlfriend: No more LazyMasquerade for you
Me: I do love how the Vision and Hawkeye are like “So hey in a totally not expositional way let’s recap everything we know about this person”
My Girlfriend: “Hey Vision, assume I was someone observing the events happening right now who hadn’t seen previous issues I mean adventures
Explain in detail everything that such a person would have missed”
My Girlfriend: The only people who live in Vietnam are peasants, gangsters and monks
Me: It’s a Known Fact
Also all the Monks know kung fu and have mytical powers
My Girlfriend: Of COURSE they do Sammy
All Asian people EVERYWHERE know kung fu and have mystical powers
We’re just born with these skills
Vision adds that a space dragon would later claim that the monks were actually ALIENS called the Kree
Me: You’d really think they’d be able to tell the difference between Vietnamese people and bright blue aliens from space but sure okay
My Girlfriend: In Marvel in the sixties and seventies, Asian people and space aliens were both drawn like they weren’t human beings so….
Me: “We’d have been able to notice this sooner but unfortunately the artist drew the entire country as such a horrifying racist caricature that the Kree blended right in”
Me: KANG IS A GIANT TIME RACIST
My Girlfriend: Two separate versions of him
So he doesn’t learn anything with time
Me: Also can we talk about how in the world of comics it apparently makes perfect sense that Kang’s PAST self is the battle-armoured conqueror from the far future
And his FUTURE self is the one who is an ancient Egyptian pharaoh
My Girlfriend: Imagine trying to explain this to literally anyone
Me: Mostly I’m just horrified that Kang became a pharaoh and never once helped a young boy get really good at card games
My Girlfriend: Kang has not learned to put his faith in the heart of the cards
Me: While Hawkeye looks like he thinks Vision has been huffing glue
My Girlfriend: EVEN THE CHARACTERS IN THE STORY THINK IT MAKES NO SENSE
Me: “My backstory involves a KGB spy trying to train a carnie to assassinate a CEO for communist Russia as revenge for him helping a battle armoured scientist defect to the west
AND THAT’S STILL THE WEIRDEST FUCKIN THING I’VE EVER HEARD”
My Girlfriend: Hawkeye needs to stop expecting his life to make sense
Me: Hawkeye needs his life to stop being so damn surreal for five seconds
My Girlfriend: That’s not even touching on how if Mantis’s whole goal is to get pregnant, flirting with the robot on the team may not be the most brilliant plan she could have come up with
Me: Just imagine, if things had worked out differently, it could have been Mantis’s character that Bendis was utterly ruining for years to come, instead of Wanda Maximoff’s
They continue their search for clues to Mantis’s past without any luck, and as they travel who should spot them but our old friend The Slasher!
Me: “They won’t hogtie the slasher!
NOT WITHOUT SOME KIND OF SAFE WORD BEING SET FIRST”
My Girlfriend: The Slasher has set some hard limits and hogtieing is a no-no
Me: It’s not something that awakens his Inner Goddess
The Slasher spots the Titanic Three at that same moment and says that seeing them and the Avengers in the same place gives him an idea
Me: “AN IDEA FOR MY NEXT FANFIC”
My Girlfriend: In a surprising plot twist, it turns out the name “The Slasher” has nothing to do with the knives on his suit
My Girlfriend: THAT MONOLOGUE SURE WAS SOMETHING
Me: SHE IS FULL OF DRAMATIC ANGST OVER WHO SHE IS MEANT TO HAVE SEX WITH
My Girlfriend: Because when a purple faced weirdo who sometimes dresses up like an Egyptian pharaoh tells you that you need to go get pregnant with a Magic Baby you have to do it
Me: OF COURSE
How can you ignore such sage advice from such a good source
My Girlfriend: Only a fool would
Me: And clearly someone who walks around in what appears to be a bright yellow and green dress they took a pair of scissors to is NO FOOL
My Girlfriend: Also can they please stop referring to her as a “Celestial”
Me: IT WOULD BE NICE
Me: AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
IT’S THE TITANIC THREE!
AND
SOME OTHER GUY!
My Girlfriend: THEY’RE HERE TO CHECK THE AVENGERS PRIVELEGE FOR THEM
Me: I love how Thor admits they’ve got no damn clue what they’re even fighting about, he’s just happy to kick someone’s ass
My Girlfriend: The Avengers seem to just go around looking for an excuse to beat the shit out of people for the most tenuous of reasons
In a LOT of these old stories
Me: It was the silver age…they were less concerned about things like motive back then…someone showed up in an Evil Costume, you just started smacking them
Me: “OKAY GANG
We’re going to solve this Cold War situation once and for all”
My Girlfriend: He’s going to throw a rock at him!
Me: Well it’s a BIG rock
My Girlfriend: “JUST LET ME THROW A ROCK AT IT”
Me: Also oh my god
Crimson Dynamo just hit Iron Man so hard his head turned into a sound effect!
Hawkeye declares that all he ever hears in the states is “Politics” and he’s bored of listening to it from Radioactive Man
Me: Personally I feel like if politicians had to paint themselves green or put on costumes and then whale on each other it would really liven up political debates
My Girlfriend: It would certainly make Question Time much more entertaining
Me: And yet somehow it still wouldn’t be more ridiculous than the 2016 presidential election
My Girlfriend: At least the Radioactive Man is honest about his ties to a fascist regime
Me: The Radioactive Man is gonna build a wall and no one is going to pay for it, ‘cause he’s gonna do it with his Cement Gun
My Girlfriend: Now I’m just mad about the cement gun again
Me: Did Marvel in the seventies ever consider creating an Asian character who…WASN’T a martial artist?
My Girlfriend: What kind of mad nonsense are you babbling
Unfortunately the Slasher bests Mantis with literally one punch
My Girlfriend: “Oh right I forgot, I can’t do anything by myself because this comics publisher is sexist”
Me: Well that’s not true
She can obsess over getting pregnant!
My Girlfriend: Such enlightened and progressive writing
Me: All her martial arts knowledge was no match for Slasher’s secret weapon…A FIST
Me: HE SHOULDN’T HAVE WHAT NOW
My Girlfriend: Please re-phrase that
Me: For the love of god please re-phrase it right now
Me: I swear to god literally every time the Crimson Dynamo fought Iron Man this happened
My Girlfriend: HE MUST BOLDLY FLEE
Me: And was he just knocked out by a NINJA
My Girlfriend: Genuinely what just happened
And even the comic isn’t going to explain it
Me: Because Vietnam is famous for the roving gangs of ninjas that menace its streets
Over with the Vision, he succeeds in knocking out the Slasher who drops his stolen diamonds…revealing to the shock of the Titanic Three that he is guilty of the robbery that he claimed the Avengers framed him for!
Me: The Titanic Three are SHOCKED
SHOCKED
That a man covered in knives who calls himself “The Slasher” is in fact a villain
My Girlfriend: How could they have ever suspected such a decent looking young man could be a BAD guy
Me: Next thing you know it’s going to turn out that Puppy Eating Lass and Tortures Orphans For Fun Man aren’t the heroic and noble individuals that they claimed to be either
My Girlfriend: You just can’t trust anyone these days
Me: “He is an affront to all decent homicidal cyborg monsters everywhere”
My Girlfriend: And this being the seventies, the Slasher is more disgusted that the Titanium Man is a communist than the fact he’s a multiple murderer
Me: Even bank robbers covered in knives are horrified by the Evils of Communism!
My Girlfriend: This has been another well written, masterfully scripted tasteful tale from silver age Marvel, the same people who brought us the Mandrill and the Lady Liberators
Me: …..
NO
NO YOU ARE NOT GOING TO TRY AND CLAIM THAT ANY OF THIS NONSENSE WAS SOME KIND OF INSIGHTFUL POLITICAL COMMENTARY
My Girlfriend: “If I say something that sounds sort of profound it might add some depth to what has in fact been 18 pages of racism and pointless fight scenes”
Me: And yet it’s still better political commentary than anything Nick Spencer’s ever written
My Girlfriend: That’s not really aiming for the stars, Samantha
Final Thoughts
My Girlfriend: Well…it COULD have been worse?
Me: The sad fact is this is probably the least racist and jingoistic portrayal of other countries and cultures that Marvel managed to produce at the time, aside from Wakanda
My Girlfriend: I still genuinely can’t believe they started a fight at a funeral
Me: You should see them at weddings
My Girlfriend: Also is it just me or did…NOTHING get accomplished here?
Me: Well Mantis seems to have decided she really needs to have sex with a robot and get pregnant
My Girlfriend: Truly a victory for the forces of justice
Me: And they apprehended the Slasher, so he’s no longer going to menace the innocent
My Girlfriend: Um…is there even an extradition treaty with the US?
Me: They don’t have to worry about things like that
THEY’RE SUPERHEROES
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Ohio by way of Niagara Falls and the Rustbelt
My grandma was turning 85. There would be a surprise party...in Westerville, OH. It’s not often everyone on my dad’s side of the family all get together anymore. We are multiplying (in fact there would be my cousin’s new baby to meet) and live all around the country. In the spirit of avoiding the weddings or funerals mindset, I knew I wanted to make this trip happen.
We decided to drive, in part because we love road trip adventures, and in part because there is no easy way to fly to Ohio from Rhode Island. Also, according to virtually everyone we mentioned this trip to, because we are crazy. We had only four days and 1600ish round trip miles to cover.
Thank god Cody is a morning person, because these types of trips only make sense when you leave well before sunrise. By the time the sky was turning red, we had already made it to our first pit stop. We were treated to this rainbow sky behind the iconic golden arches in an almost empty parking lot, save for a few over the road truckers.
I had been daydreaming about taking the kids to see Niagara Falls for a while. I was there just once in college, while visiting friends at RIT; this would be Cody’s first time. After looking at the map, I decided it would be a great way to break up the drive. We had learned there are bike paths all around Niagara Falls, so decided this would be the perfect opportunity to try out our bike rack on its first long trip.
Our drive took us right along the Erie Canal. Coincidentally, Willa’s 3rd grade chorus was in the process of learning Low Bridge, so we all had that song stuck in our head for days. We got off the highway in Canastota, NY and got to see a painted low bridge up close.
Cody is an expert at the backroads, and this is one of my favorite things he brings to our adventures. Miles of highway can get so monotonous - from the interstate, everything looks the same - but one reprieve into a small rustbelt town is enough to light a fire of interest and curiosity in all of us.
There’s a toe path that runs along parts of the Erie Canal and through this town - you can see it just beyond that arch in the picture. We didn’t have time to get our bikes out, but we walked along it for a little and saw some beavers working on their dam.
Small towns like this make me feel at home, and it was relaxing to walk around and just see life happening on a sleepy Thursday morning. I like how the murals gave us a small glimpse into what the town might have been like back in the canal’s hay day.
“A House Held Up By Trees” - Other perks of taking back roads - seeing a house held up by trees that looks just like the pictures in the book we have by the same name.
After playing a friendly competition of Eye Spy (a farm animal - 5 points, a silo - 7 points, an Amish person - 10 points), we got back on the highway to log some more miles. We took this opportunity to listen to every podcast we could find about people going over the falls in a barrel. Next stop - the Canadian border!!
We crossed the border at the Lewiston-Queenston Bridge and just followed signs for Niagara Falls. We weren’t sure what to expect. The last time I came here, we walked across the border from the US side during a time when you didn’t need passports. This route took us along the Niagara Parkway and we saw that right beside us was a bike path along the Niagara River.
We parked the ramvan right near the Butterfly Conservatory and unloaded the bikes, resisting the urge (mostly mine) to first go look at the butterflies. It was about 2:00 in the afternoon, and we were all ready to be out of the van and stretch our legs.
We had no idea how far we were from Niagara Falls, and purposely didn’t look at a map to find out; we figured we must be pretty close.
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It felt great to have reached out first destination and be out in the fresh air in one of the first warm days of the spring. The mood was slightly less jubilant as we kept riding for 7 more miles before we finally reached the falls. Oops! Didn’t think it would be quite that far, but there were a few picturesque places to stop along the way.
Someday I would love/be slightly terrified to ride one of these gondolas across the Niagara River. By the time we got to this junction, we could start to hear the roar of the falls (good thing because the kids were beginning to lose patience).
It was so worth it to have the anticipation build and get to slowly approach this view by bike. I was trying to put myself in the shoes of someone who had no idea what to expect, but it was also just as awe inspiring the second time around.
It was a beautiful sunny day, but it had been a long cold winter and the falls were still pretty pretty frozen, so the Maid of the Mist tour boats weren’t running. While I would have liked the experience of getting so close to the falls, it was kind of nice to not have to feel like we were missing out on something if we decided to view the falls just from above.
It got more and more crowded as we got closer to the horseshoe falls. The temperature dropped a solid 15 degrees as we walked through the mist coming off the falls.
We were now closer to the main streets of town, and could see our hotel in the distance. We were staying at the Marriott on the Falls and it was just down a little farther and one street above us. We had come so far - we decided to just keep walking/riding to get to our hotel and then send Cody back to get the van once we checked in. There was an incline car to get up to the main street from the falls, but there was one problem - no bikes allowed. We were so close, yet so far away. We ended up on a trek through a big parking lot that we were sure would lead to a road to the hotel. Instead, we found a dead end. We saw a dirt path through the woods above that said no trespassing, but it seemed like our only option. After convincing the kids that it is okay to sometimes break rules at times like this (MY HEART VOICE SAYS TAKE THE PATH!!), we made it up to the main road, and finally to our hotel.
There were no falls view rooms left, but we could walk right around the corner from our room to the elevator alcove for this amazing view. The hotel stored our bikes for us while Cody rode his to get the van. The parking lot in the above picture is the one we rode through.
We contemplated walking down to the busier part of town for a restaurant dinner, but it was getting late and the kids wanted to swim (always get the hotel with the pool!). Cody took them down to the pool while I unpacked and laid out this dinner spread. I had packed a ton of food for this trip and we ended up not eating out at all. After dinner, we turned on a movie for the kids, and Cody and I took our wine and went around the corner to sit by the hallway window and look at falls. People coming off of the elevator probably thought we were nuts, but we just wanted to soak in that view. And it’s a good thing we did - when we woke up the next morning, it was so foggy that you couldn’t even tell the falls were there. We took that as our cue to leave - but not before a morning swim. Onward to Ohio!
We took a slight detour to drive through the town of Erie. It was a part of PA I had never been to. The city center still had kind of a 1960′s vibe and it was easy to imagine what life might have been like back then. Cody led us down to Presque Isle State Park, which is a peninsula that juts out into Lake Erie. It was still pretty foggy, so we couldn’t see much. We stopped for a picnic lunch and planned our next move.
There are 21 miles of bike paths throughout the park. It had started raining a little, but we decided we couldn’t pass them up.
We rode for a few miles and found an End of the Rhode type of beach with dunes perfect for jumping.
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It was nice to have some time to explore and stretch our legs, because after this stop, it was hammer down to Ohio; we were expected by dinner.
After hundreds of miles of driving, coming from two completely different places, and not talking all day about our travel plans, the Wolfe’s pulled into the parking lot of my grandma’s apartment at the exact same time we did. Twin powers unite! We only had about 36 hours in Ohio, so we were going to make the most of them. After a pizza dinner with everyone trickling in as they arrived, we went back and slept at my aunt and uncles’ house. On Saturday, there would be a Bunny Hop 5K run, an Easter egg hunt, lunch and a tour of my grandma’s new apartment building, and the surprise party.
It was a busy day, but so worth it to get to spend it with these people!
Sunday was Easter. We had originally planned to get up and leave pretty early, but we decided to enjoy a more leisurely morning. We had a nice breakfast at my aunt and uncles’, then headed over to my grandma’s where the kids rode their bikes on the bike paths that surround her apartment while the adults “visited” (as my mom calls it). We took some final photo ops and were on our way around noon.
At our first gas station stop, the kids were excited to discover that the Easter bunny had left their baskets and some eggs hidden in the ramvan! Each time we stopped, there would be a couple more eggs hidden, filled with lego people they could put together and play with in the car. That Easter bunny sure is a tricky guy.
We weren’t sure if we would try to drive the whole way in one shot, or if we would have to stop overnight somewhere. The kids fell asleep in the car around 9:00, and by the time we got to NYC around 11:30 hardly anyone else was on the road. We knew at this point it would take us twice as long to drive the remaining 200 miles in morning traffic, so we just went for it. And by “we” I mostly mean Cody. I just did my best to stay awake and pick good podcasts.
4 days, 1700 miles, and a whole lot of fun. And we even all made it to school and work the next day!
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It’s Raining Men
Don’t worry, Lydia’s dad, whose greatest wish is to marry us off to the gentlemen of his choosing. You still may get your day in the sun.
We’re both still single. Painfully single. Like we spent last weekend sitting in our home office eating pizza, collecting beverage glasses on our desks, and watching ten episodes of a Korean drama online. That’s how single we are.
#noregrets
However, we can’t seem to keep the men at bay.
This all started about a year ago, after Naomi had gotten married and settled into life with her new roommate (who seemed like a downgrade from living with us awesome people, honestly) and it had been a long while since she’d come back to our once shared house. So Lydia and I invited her to come over for supper after work one evening and stay for a movie.
We had a delicious meal and went downstairs to start the movie right away. It was like 7pm. Kids are still up at 7pm. It was summer, and the sun was still out.
We got about twenty minutes into the movie, and we heard a knock on the door in the garage, which is right at the top of the stairs. Then the door opened, and a man’s voice came down the stairs “Hello!”
All three of us had the same assumption - it had to be Lydia’s brother stopping over for some reason or Naomi’s new husband looking for her. Lydia went to the steps and started with “We’re downstairs” and ended with “...can I help you?”
Naomi and I, still sitting on the couch, looked at each other in utter confusion.
“Uhh... um... is Lisa here?” was the man’s response.
Lydia set him straight and he quickly backed off and left. We spent the rest of our movie trying to track him down on Facebook by looking for Lisas (this was successful, just FYI) and over-analyzing what kind of idiot just walks into unknown houses under the assumption someone they know is inside. We decided Lisa was his wife, judging from the profile pictures Lydia could see on Facebook, that he had to be looking for her in our neighborhood for some reason (LuLaRoe or Thirty-One, if I had to guess) and he assumed with the two cars in our driveway and the open garage door that there was a party happening at our house.
Crisis averted. We haven’t seen him again. All’s well that ends well.
Scenario two:
It was nine p.m., later that same summer.
I, like most sane people in their own homes after the sun sets, was wearing pajamas and minding my own business.
In fact, I was being a responsible family member and Skyping with my sister. She was telling me about her dress for homecoming and I was giving her a hard time about a writing project of hers. We were paused, inbetween conversations, when my doorbell rang.
Amberly and I stared at each other, via webcams, in utter confusion. I quickly calculated through the (very) short list of people who could possibly be ringing the doorbell after nine p.m. on a Saturday night.
The doorbell rang again. I sprang into action, which was basically running around the house in the dark trying to figure out how to keep from giving up my location in the house while trying to find jeans because there was no possible way I was opening the front door wearing my moose pajama pants.
Exhibit A:
(Painfully single, remember? #noregrets )
I was trying to be quiet, because it was a nice night so every single window in the house was wide open. I caught a glimpse of a pickup truck parked on the street, confirming that whoever was ringing the doorbell was indeed a complete stranger, as I know only two of the pickup truck drivers in town, and they each have exactly zero reason to go to my house. Amberly was super helpful in my attempts at covertness, as she basically screamed through my phone speakers “WHO’S AT YOUR DOOR? ARE YOU ALONE?”
I ducked into the furthest room from the front door and hissed a quick “I’llcallyoubackbye” at Amberly and hung up the Skype call.
I ducked across the hall into my bedroom in an attempt to find real pants in the dark. The doorbell was on its third ring by now, and as I located a pair of jeans and debated whether or not I needed to change my shirt as well, Lydia stepped out of the bathroom. She was also decked out in pajamas, but they were a touch classier than mine so I guess she thought it was suitable to answer the door in them.
She turned on the lights and opened the door despite my intense whispers. “It’s someone in a TRUCK. DO YOU KNOW ANYONE WITH A TRUCK?”
Creeper With Truck at Door After 9 P.M: “Hi, I’ve got your pizza.”
Lydia: “…we didn’t order a pizza.”
Pizza Delivery Man With Truck: “…. West Spring Street?”
Lydia, gently, with great concern for his navigating abilities: “…this is Edgewood.”
Pizza Man: “Oh, crap! I’m sorry!”
Incident 3:
I’m home on Fridays. It’s nice. Today I had a couple cups of coffee and read for a while. Then I psyched myself up to work on a huge writing project. A few minutes in, I realized it was a beautiful 73 degrees and I needed to have the windows open.
Sitting at my computer in the office, I have a straight view out onto the street in front of the house. My car was parked there.
It was nearly noon when this green Taurus pulled up across from my car. It was right there in my line of vision, plain as day, literally in broad daylight. A skinny punk in a snapback got out and headed for my car.
I watched with something between
and
But I was not about to wait around and let him just climb in my car and do whatever it was he wanted to do, be it drive around the block or steal my highly-coveted 18-pack of paper towels in the back seat. So I bellowed out the window the first semi-threatening expletive sentence I came up with in the most disgusted I-could-come-out-there-and-beat-that-stupid-hat-right-into-your-skull tone I could muster.
The kid slowly backed off and got back into his car and made a phone call as he left.
I was livid. I stormed outside and immediately put my car in the garage for safe keeping. I wanted to drive the block and find this punk and sit him down in front of his mother and make him explain to both of us just what he was doing.
Lydia told me to call the police department, which was obviously my next step. After hiding the goods and trying to track down the offender, my next knee-jerk reaction would have been to alert the authorities. Obviously.
So I called the police department, which up until that moment I had successfully avoided in my adulthood. The lady took down all my information and I explained what had happened. That was really all there was to be done. I had nothing to give her that would help find this kid, he hadn’t actually done anything, and he was gone.
However, her parting words to me were “I’ll send someone over right away.”
This was the scariest part of the situation for me, honestly. I had no makeup on, hadn’t brushed my teeth after my pot of coffee and sausage and egg breakfast, and had zero comprehension of how much time “right away” gave me to change these things.
I scrambled with my eyeliner and brushed my teeth like a madwoman. The doorbell rang before I was finished but I still high fived myself for my skills. Also, high five to the Waupun Police Department for being so responsive to a nothing phone call.
The officer had me relay everything I had already told the dispatch person to him. He asked to see my car, which I had oh-so-helpfully moved into the garage. Which of course kicked my anxiety into overdrive and I immediately assumed probably made me look guilty and could potentially be as stupid as moving the dead body after you find it in the woods. I was probably going to jail.
So I led this officer through my house and let him see my sad little rusted out car that was no help to him. While he was looking it over, two. more. officers? showed up at the front door. I heard them but I wasn’t sure if I was allowed to abandon a police officer when he was asking me questions, and they let themselves in. Through my house and into my garage they came, and suddenly three Waupun PD officers were in my garage inspecting my car.
I was a model citizen, doing my part for society.
WPD: “What was he wearing?”
A: “Um. A snapback.”
WPD: “Shorts? Pants?”
A: “Uhh... shorts? Maybe?”
WPD” “How old was the car?”
A: “It was green.”
Look out, snapback kid, we’re coming for you.
The three officers paraded back out through my house and parted ways with mentions of some Beaver Dam hooligan they’d crossed paths with before, how to canvas the immediate area, and that they’d be in touch with me if they came up with anything.
But really, there was nothing to come up with. The kid was either stupidly mistaking my car for a friend’s, or stupidly trying to steal things in the middle of the day with landscapers working outside right up the street. And my intense yell out the window put the fear of God into his heart, and he was long gone.
So in conclusion, The Ladypad, as we affectionately named our house before we moved in, is far from a boring residence. The list of uninvited guests on this property has grown considerably more than I ever expected or desired.
I will say, however, that the three officers who came to my aid at the drop of a hat were the most welcomed uninvited guests on the list.
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Antonito News • July 06, 2019 at 08:26PM
Del Norte, Colorado August 5, 1887 Believing from my own sufferings that my time is near at hand, when the dread fiat shall go forth, "This night Broyles they soul shall be required of thee", and also that while it is true although I have lived 12 years in the San Luis Valley and must therefore be known to most people in the San Juan Country. Still that there is much of work undone and I am proud to say and feel not at my own instance or volition for of a truth I may say, while like all boys and men I have committed the minor grades of vice fun and wickedness yet I never in all my life wronged a man, out of cent, or told one a deliberate lie. I suppose I have my enemies, all men have them, but no one lives or has lived, who can blacken my record. I am proud to recite that I was raised when honesty was based on religion and social standings derived all its lustre from the theory that "Worth made the man". My father, Dr. Ozey R. Broyles of South Carolina, was a poor young man, but studied medicine, greatly to his chagrin in after life for being ambitious and high spirited. That the more one learns the more he sees the broad filed of ignorance spread out before him. He was naturally fluent in conversation which later benefited for the stage of convenience, his regust at his mistake in the choice of his profession naturally made him abhor his choice all the more. And to avoid his sons falling into the same error, he spent hours at a time extolling to his boys the glories and victories won upon the arena of public life, as compared with the filth and stench of a physician's life. To say nothing of the labors of a physician, ever ready to be called from his bed by patients, whether responsible or not. With this view from a father's stand-point, and to which we would listen with delight would fill our breast with joy. I commenced the study of law. I procured a good English Education, prepared my self for college, and the law. I was now eighteen years old having been born at Anderson County, South Carolina on the twenty sixth day of March 1826. My father, Dr. O. R. Broyles, was born, raised, married, and died in Anderson County, South Carolina. My mother was a Toliaferro called Toliver, was a Virginian, and now at this writing is alive and well in her 85th year. My first schooling was on the Beaver Dam, SC, old field style. I then went to Pendleton, SC and entered the South Carolina College. At this place I completed a course of studies and left it in the fall of 1845. I was cut off one year by sickness. A spell of Typhoid Fever that so crippled my limbs that I did not walk for years and I feel menially the effects to this day. I left college in 1845 and in 1846 commenced the study of Blackstone (William Blackstone, Commentaries on the Laws of England, 1765). With this abstruse work, the greatest of all books, I wrestled for two years diligently. Only to find out by time that it would be laid on the shelf as a spark would be seen from the mighty volume of the days Luminary. So many books have been written on the law, that I even would not attempt, but rather incline to the opinion that if hundreds were destroyed and the old laws left in force and the rulings of good sense made our guide, the world would be better off than we are not. Suffice it to say, the heart leaped with joy as I gazed upon the legal panes wealth and character that stood before me. I entered the study with more than ordinary zeal. The fact is if I was ever a student, it was of law. From boyhood, I took in a large field of fun and frolic, and while not the meanest boy in school, was by no means the best. I was full of fun, and always kept the little ones crying and the girls sighing. At the end of two more studies, I was admitted at Columbia, South Carolina, and my professional rostrum was higher that day to look than it has ever been since. This accords with the theory that the more one learns, the more he sees, the broad path of ignorance lies spread out before him. I soon fell in with the belief that I was a made up man, only wanted a wife. In this, my secession was incomparably good as I got one, if not the best woman of her day. And beloved by everyone. I married Miss Lucy A> Johnson of Barnwell, SC, and lived together some thirty years and was finally divorced by God's inerrorable law. This occurred in 1881 while I was in Colorado and had been since March 1875. Then we parted as others with fond hope of meeting. But not so, we never met again. And now four boys and two girls are left in Georgia as the fruit of our marriage. I am ashamed of none of them, yet might have been made to feel prouder. September 11, 1887 In 1849, I settled at the instance of my father on Nolichucky River in East Tennessee to farm much against my will. For I felt it was a surrender of all my life long hopes and aspirations. I had but little experience in farming and for fear of a failure, I worked hard and faithful. The result was I made a big crop, and had all the comforts of life around me. I have often thought and believe now if I had been content to farm, and remained on the place, I would have done much better in life in a worldly sense, but not so. Such was the bent of my mind. Bright hopes of fame and fortune, shown forth upon my rison in the field of my ambition. And not satisfied, on the 18th day of 1849 I pulled up stakes and moved to Spring Place, Murray County, Georgia. Most of my effects was boated down the river in tide water to Chattanooga, Tenn. This before a Rail Road ever reached that now flourishing city. In 1850 I commenced the practice of law. But unfortunately, I had a few negros and a farm which made me careless of my profession. And independent of it for support, I stayed in Murray County, Georgia three years and was elected County Judge over a good man, John Bell. I resigned the Office and moved twelve miles west of Dalton, Georgia. Here I practiced my profession with success, but impeded by the same causes that injured me at Spring Place. I continued the practice until war. But in 1858 I was appointed on the staff of Governor Brown as one of his aides with the rank of Colonel. And the same fall was elected to the Legislature from Whitfield County, Georgia. I served on the judiciary and other important committees and was one of five from the House with three from the Senate of Georgia. I was a member in the stormy days of Secession and opposed separate State action. In 1861 I went to Virginia as a Private in the 11th Georgia Regiment commanded by Col. G. T. Anderson. And was with the army of General Joseph E. Johnson at Winchester, Virgina that made the great march to reinforce Beauregard at Bull Run. I was a foot and not being accustomed to walking, I suffered much while my feel bled freely. We did not get to the Bull Run fight. As being new troops, the older was shipped from Piedmont Franquier County, Virginia, in advance of us. We got there after the battle was over, but in time to witness the destruction of life and property with the horrors of war. In the Fall, I returned home and commenced to help raise a regiment with Col. J. A. Glenn. We succeeded and I was commissioned Major of it in 1862. I served under Kirby Smith in Kentucky in that year and in the Winter came out Bragg's Army. We were then soon sent to Middle Tennessee and remained there until the day before Christmas 1863 when our regiment with Stephenson's division was ordered to Vicksburg, Mississippi. We garrisoned this place until the Federal fleet passed Vicksburg, and we then moved out on Big Black. And fought the battle of Champion Hill or Baker's Creek. This was a hard battle, I was holding my horse in the thickest of it when he was shot. I let him go to die and suppose he did. We fell back to Vicksburg and the seige commenced. It was not in my front where Grant made his attack, but in the Brigade to my left. I stood and witnessed the whole battle and the destruction of human life. We surrendered after 48 days and nights. During which time we suffered for food and ate mule meat. And anything we could get. We surrendered on the 4th of July, 1863. Was paroled on the 9th and left on the 12th. The troops all went home. And in October we exchanged and rendezvous at Chickamauga (Georgia). We followed General Burnside to London and after the battle of Chickamauga, we were relieved by Longstreet and occupied Missionary Ridge, while Sherman was in Chattanooga. I was commissioned Colonel of my regiment in Spring of 1864. I was in front of Sherman to Atlanta in the battles of Resacca, New Hope Church, Luss Mountain, Kennesaw, Pouder Springs, Chattahoochee, and many skirmishes, and all around Atlanta. I turned back with hood and was in Nashville, Tennesee. In the two days fighting there and returned on his retreat with him to Augusta, Georgia. At this place, I was furloughed by General Beauregard on the 5th day of February 1865, on account of rheumatism. This ended my service of the Confederacy as I was disabled and had neither horse nor money to regain my command. Then on its way to North Carolina, I was paroled at Anderson Court House, South Carolina, and in the fall of 1865 returned with my family to Dalton, GA, poor, money-less, and I may say, half-clothed. We worked hard and our troubles were great and many. But bourn as best we could. In 1868, I borrowed money to go as a delegate to the reconstruction convention in Atlanta. I made the 2nd ratification speech in favor R. B. Bullock for Governor, and he came up to me at the time and promised me, that if he was elected Governor "he would remember me". That Fall the Republican Convention to nominate a candidate for Congress was unanimously for me. I had the nomination, but declined it because I was too poor to make the convas. I was then appointed Solicitor General of the Circuit. I preferred it to Judgeship. And with this Office which I filled four years, I relieved my family of much of their want and suffering. My term ended in 1872. And I assumed my profession. But was induced by my wife to buy a stock of goods and put the boys to merchandising, as railroading was more trying and hazardous. I did so. They neglected the business and went back to railroading. So I gave my attention to this until March 1875, I sold out, and on the 22nd day of March 1875, I left Georgia for the Territory of Colorado. I arrived in Denver, Colorado about 28th of March, and about April 1st left for Del Norte, Colorado, reaching that place on the 9th of April after a nice days journey by wagon and team. In November 1881, my wife died at her home in Georgia. I had not seen her for years and as I was anxious to make a property before going back that would make her and our children comfortable and happy. I was thus deprived of that hope, and as noble a woman as ever lived on this earth. My first year in Colorado was spent mining, and like thousands, I did no good. I went to Lake City and helped build the sixth log cabin in that place when it was a willow brush patch. In the Fall of 1875, I came back to Del Norte. The next Spring, I opened a Law Office and had good success. I made money and put it in prospect holes from New Mexico to the Gunnison Country. In 1876, I went to Ouray, made money, but could not collect my fees. In the Fall, I came back to the then Garland City. And here I had good success at law and when the railroad got to Alamosa, I went on there with it and made money also. In October 1892, while at San Luis Court, I met Miss Nellie Armstrong, a highly respectable young woman, and fell in love with her. My love increased as I knew her the more and it was reciprocated and in April 1884, we were married at San Acacio, Costilla County, Colorado. She was from Indiana, and an intelligent highly esteemed ,lady. And at this writing, the fruits of marriage are two smart promising boys. The foregoing synopsis of my life was written when I fully believed I was going to die from the effects of medicine administered by one so called Dr. J.R. Grubb. At least 1/8 negro, and I am satisfied at the instance of some three or four land sharks and thieves who hung around the Land Office to rob and prey upon settlers and honest men. For the reason that as Register of U.S. Land Office, they knew full well they could not carry out their schemes of rascality and plunder. I was to be got out of the way or their financial schemes of plunder were ended. Dr. Grubb was the tool or instrument of hell to carry out nefarious schemes of these devils. I have outlived them all, God choked the Dr. Grubb to death. And his instigators are a disgraced, disreputable, impoverished set of outlaws and responsible class. C. E. Broyles •••• This missive was written by Charles Edward Broyles, an attorney within the San Luis Valley, and an Antonito, Colorado resident at the time of his passing in 1906.can be read at: https://ift.tt/2hezh3z
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Alon Mor – Long Awaited Journey
Music is storytelling. Alon Mor is one of the best storytellers I’ve heard in a long time. He is not a DJ or a producer. He is a modern day composer. I’m already on a tirade of looking out for new artists to blow up in 2018. Alon More makes that list for me. His newest album is Long Awaited Journey. It’s an album putting a new school touch on old school styles, with visions of leading full orchestras, changing the definition of “live” sets, and creating a fully immersive audiovisual experience that will trigger and activate all the human senses. And the release of his new album has been causing a stir amongst all sorts of artists across varying genres. Exhibit a, enter Kill The Noise, Rezz, and Herobust.
I’ve put the album ahead of my journey with it, so you can read along while listening to the album. The way I suggest you listen to this is in isolation or group of individuals down for a musical journy. The audio journey requires focus. Sit back, pour yourself a glass of wine or two, sit back and listen. If you have good headphones, I suggest you use them. Try and imagine a visual scenario wherever the music is taking you. For example, start off on a ship sailing the 7 seas, and let the music create the rest of the story. It’s also good for working and studying!
Here’s where this album took my story. I wrote this entire story while I was listening. I added some general musical comments of mine in bigger font, under the song titles. I stopped doing those because I got so engrained in the story of my journey with Long Awaited Journey.
El Despertar
Such a beautiful build, both in harmony and melody. The melody starts off bright then turns ominous. Super wide ambiance that sounds tangible. A lot of his sounds sound like you can feel them with your fingers.
My story starts on a boat. I just woke up and walked outside. The whole world is in front of me, I have my crew around me, and I’m noticing all the beauty around me. Soon, I see dark clouds forming in the distance. I head down, get some breakfast, and notice the thunder is getting louder in the meanwhile.
Mania
The contrast between light and dark on this track is apparent. Maybe the title is an ode to bipolar mania. On the sound side of things, the drums sound like war drums during some dark periods in time.
I’m happily eating breakfast. A crew member aggressively approaches me and starts yelling. It’s early, so my head is a bit fuzzy and I can’t quite comprehend. I make a confused face, and he continues yelling at me. All of a sudden…BOOM! We’re hit and everything starts collapsing around the crew and me. Then, everything freezes. Myself and the crew are suspended in midair. We start thinking about how unreal this feels, being suspended in midair. This entire phenomenon is starting to become supernatural, and there’s as a green aurora all around us. ZIP – we start moving upwards. Ahhhhhhh! All I think is that we’re in a blackhole, or some sort of alien mechanism hurling us towards another dimension. I blackout and quickly wake up in a lush, green field surrounded by my crew. It’s beautiful all around me: trees with fruits hanging, birds chirping, the sun, apps that I grow to love, free money everywhere, healthy McDonals, and hills for miles away. In the distance, there is one building that we can see. It’s a castle. We start walking towards it because, why not?
Presudeos
Let this song build for the first 3 minutes. WOW – that sound design is unreal. It actually feels like slime.
The journey is long, and most of us are slightly confused as to where we’ve landed. No one is lost, I’m still here with the crew. No directions were given after the abrupt blackhole, so we played the card we were handed, and walked towards the only sign of civilization that we could see. The grass is less green as we get closer and closer to the castle. We notice the atrocity and keep walking. We hear a horn coming from the castle. A sign of humanity. Night approaches, and silence creeps in. Luminescent eyes start appearing, and we realize we’re not alone. The ground starts turning to a waterbed like substance. Most of us trip and slide into the pockets because it’s really hard to walk on waterbeds. “This is not the world we came from,” I thought. Mammal like creatures seem to be flying around us. Like, way too big to have wings and glide through the air. Not harming us (thank god), just passing by. The ground has really taken it’s tole on me, as I continue struggling trying to walk on a waterbed. I look around, and see that the others have given up, They are just lying there. I follow suite. Then this strange looking giant beaver starts jumping up and down on the ground, causing more and more chaos. The beaver leaves, and I can finally relax a bit.
The night is somewhat peaceful with an ambiance you can feel on your skin. I fall asleep – for a bit. Still unsettled at the current situation. I jolt awake, to another giant beaver jumping around on the waterbed-like ground. This time it’s a MUCH bigger beaver, so some of us are flung throughout the kingdom. I am flung closest to the castle, where the ground is more stable and the sky is bright. It seems to be morning, and the castle is surrounded by a village, operating like normal. My anxiety rises as I approach the castle. I am comforted by the festive scene around me; I see a crying old lady. Looked sad, but decided not to mettle in her personal life. I continue moving towards the castle.
Encore
As I approach the castle doors, I am met by a giant butterfly who can speak my language. The animal was quite spectacular looking; colors I hadn’t seen before. The butterfly assures me not to worry, and starts asking me about myself. I was told not to worry, and that all questions would be answered shortly. I continue probing because I don’t know where I am, so I’m freakin out a bit. The butterfly seems annoyed at my probing. The butterfly starts acting a bit more dismissive, but I still felt I should continue following. We reach the castle gates, and we pause. “Just a second,” says the butterfly.
Holly’s Necklace
Super creepy distorted voices along with driving synths and heavy percussion.
A woman comes out of the smaller castle, she say’s her name is Holly and says “Let’s do something crazy tonight.” I’m all in at this point, I guess. I AM here, so I might as well make the best of it. She leads me to her car, and we head off. We’re driving along a highway, not speaking. Each time I ask for an explanation, she just repeats the same thing, “Don’t worry, you’ll be fine, you’ll understand soon.” She asks me if I like going fast. I reply, “kinda.” She puts the petal to the metal, my body jerks forward, the seatbelt locks, and we start bursting along this highway at 200 MPH. There’s nothing I can concentrate on aside from, “dam, we’re going fast.” She slows down, and we finally reach an exit that lead to a massive opening. The sign reads, “Terrain Park.” We don’t exit the car. I’m getting the sense this is a terrain park for cars. AHHHHHHHH we start going off jumps, hitting, loop-de-loops, grinding on trucks, jumping over houses. The terrain park finally ends and we continue driving along.
Late Night Skyline
My heart continues to thump after that insane experience. Holly continues driving, ignoring my strong desire to understand, “why?” I’m a prisoner in another dimension at this point, so I’m not certain what I can trust. Holly seems powerful, and listening to her seems like the right thing to do…for now. We finally park and get out of the car.
We reach a maze, and Holly runs through the entrance. I follow her because I love mazes too. The whole maze situation is another layer of confusion in this already confusing place. We’re walking through the maze, and it’s getting late. The ground is getting that waterbed feel. Not only do I have to traverse this maze, but there’s also another layer of the wobbling ground. The ground begins to sink more and more, like REALLY DEEP. Much deeper than the last waterbed depth. Tt’s impossible to move. I start sinking deep into the meshy earth. I give up and sink in. Holly grabs me, and pulls me back up. Coming up was a slow rewinding effect, it felt similar to the blackhole. We’re back to normal, continuing our walk through the maze. She stopped me when we got to this orange circular object and said, “Don’t hit the gleblegorfs, or else you sink.” I didn’t know I hit one in the first place, I must have missed it. This made me trust her more. We continue onward. As we walked, I saw more gleblegorfs, and there were vines growing over, through, and around the maze, moving in random directions, disrupting our path to the final. We finally get out, a sense of euphoria sinks in. I’m so tired, so I pass out and go to sleep. Holly allows it.
Early Morning Winds
I wake up on the side of the highway for some reason. Holly has set up breakfast outside the car with a canopy and everything. “Wow, this place seems normal when convenient,” I thought. We begin eating Grapefuits and hard-boiled eggs. YUM! It was my first meal for an entire day, so I wasn’t picky. I was famished, in fact. I can’t concentrate on anything else, aside from the enjoyment of food. I get full and we continue to sit there to let the meal digest. I start to worry about the fact that I just went to another dimension. It’s never happened to me, and I always though I’d be ripped to shreds rather than treated nicely. I start thinking about my family, and if I’d ever see them again, Holly says “Hey, your family is safe and they’ll see you again.” That made me feel better, and it made me trust her more. We get back in the car and drive off.
The Midelar
I’m going to have to mark this as one of my favorite songs in 2018. This song is so freakin’ good. Reminds me of when I was obsessed with Maggot Bain by Funkadelic. Both 10 minutes of a freakin emotional journey; however, Midelar’s sound production is unlike anything I’ve heard before. The sounds are sending me tingling frequencies, reminding me of ASMR.
Holly starts talking to me about something she’s done, something she created. She wanted to get my opinion on it. She keeps mentioning “what she’s done” and worries if she can “look back and smile.” I asked her, “what did you do?” She says, “I’ll show you.” She takes me to these enormous doors. The sign reads, “My Masterpiece.” We drive in, and the place is one of the most beautiful places I’ve ever seen. Layers upon layers of rolling mountains, with different color flowers, trees, wildlife flourishing everywhere, and two enormous lakes with what seemed to be a pathway leading between them.
We pass through the walkway between two lakes. It’s getting fairly thin, and the water looks super dark, creatures swimming underneath. They looked big. We finally get across, and were on what appears to be a mountainous-lake area. It’s beautiful around me, and big. Then I notice something enormous coming through the ground.
An physical entity that I couldn’t even describe the shape of, made from the buildings, lakes, and animals surrounding the earth around us. It started taking a more familiar giant human form to help me visualize a bit more. A giant human made of the earth. Gravity was muuuch different here. The size along I couldn’t handle, but the sounds it was making and the parts that made it whole where unlike anything I’ve ever seen, felt, and, most importantly to finish the sound metaphor, heard.
It began to walked away, towards a sunset, taking the threat away of this monstrosity attacking us. It was the most beautiful thing I’d ever seen, moving in a fluid manner towards one of the lakes. I had to take a second to breath for a bit; not knowing what I was looking at. Though, I knew it was the most beautiful thing I ever sensed. The creature started heading towards the water.
The giant earth monster jumped in and started swimming. The noise it made while swimming was immense. It got out, and sat along the lake shore, drying off, looking out towards the sun.
Holly asked me, “So, what do you think?” I responded, “ughhhhhhhh, what’s the highest score I can give?” She was happy, and all of a sudden, she seemed more confident. A sparkle in her eye and smile on her face that could only be pride. And it was well deserved. Look at that thing!
Tyche’s Singing
We continue staring at Holly’s creation. The size and presence was undeniable. I still couldn’t believe it. It was time for Holly to show us more. She asked me if I knew what this was? Why we are here? Why are we doing the things we’re doing? Making me feel utterly confused and uncertain, I felt like she was getting a bit too philosophical. Searching for an answer that might be be there. She came back, feeling there might be AN answer, but it’s more about where you’re going next. There was more she wanted to show me.
Molly brought me to a house along the lake. She let me rest a bit, and eventually woke me up. She told me she wanted to get crazy tonight. I was like “UGHHHHHH again?” implying I was quite crazed out for the day. But I was totally down and trusting of where she’d take me next. I completely trusted her at this point.
Los Recuerdos
We start walking through a field. It’s raining, so we can’t see far. It stops raining, and the fog clears. There was a magical entrance way with a variety of trees with fruits galore. Communities of people creatures I’ve never seen before dancing all over the place, THRIVING and having fun. It was like a music festival meets a petting zoo with independent animals and they sky was filled with docile aquarium creatures. We start enjoying ourselves, dancing, eating anything we desired, all the creatures had the friendliest demeanor. The music was unlike anything I heard and the visual storytelling was unlike anything I witnessed. There were so many extracurricular activities, even Holly throws down a killer set with her enormous earth creation. It was pure joy. The floor started getting wobbly again, but I wasn’t scared.
The night came to a close. The acts finished up, and we leave. It’s sad that the fun came to an end. We quickly start reminiscing, remembering again how GREAT that night was. We started reminiscing and sharing crazy videos we took, n pics n moments n stuff. We start driving again. We drive for quite sometime. A thought started creeping in. A thought that that this magical journey was about to end. Sadness, realization, what is life, depressed, you just wanna sleep and not do things. AHHHHHHHH I HAVE RESPONSIBILITIES . Eh whatever, that’s life I guess. Just gotta be happy, buuuuuut what if I hopped off that bridge?!?! I point to a bridge. Think for a second, things get really dark – no resolution! “Few that got dark at the end,” the narrator thought to himself.
Halpfire Harmonies
We show up to the place where it all began. It’s a bittersweet goodbye. A rumbling: “Ahhhhhh I’m getting sucked back up through the blackhole.” “Ahhhh why is time travel such a hassle!?!? Huge buildup scene of me getting sucked back to reality. Things go quiet again. I’m stuck, waiting for the blackhole’s next move. Holly appears and says, “dreams and reality are the same thing.” I land back on my boat with the crew around me looking just as puzzled. Holly’s voice in the distance shouts, “Go and live your long awaited journey, go on without me.” I get the sense of pure and utter confusion of what just happened, distress that it’s over, and resolve that it’s past. A grand finale to one of the craziest, most immense journeys I’ve been on. I take a breath and understand that I have another one to be on. I head home.
That was pretty fun, I must say. It makes me appreciate the album in its entirety, and it’s fun to do if you like to tell stories or create things
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