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my-happy-little-bean · 5 years

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Golden Slumbers - Chapter 20

[Previous Chapter]

Chapter 20: Yellow Roses

pairings: logan/patton (logicality), roman/virgil (prinxiety) words: 2787 warnings: alcohol, sad vibes, maybe swearing; with solemn, you never know (bean edit: there is no swearing! such wonders is this!) summary: logan fray has been running his flower shop, aster’s, for about three years now. he hasn’t run into too much trouble yet—other than the occasional presence of his friend, roman prince, who runs a broadway-themed café across the street—and his life had been relatively quiet for quite some time now. that is, until patton sanders opens up a gift shop next door that prides itself in pun-filled cards. that’s when logan’s life gets a bit…louder.

a/n- did you know that roman has a cat named dinah? she was mentioned in chapter 9, did you know that?

we back, bby.

thanks to @solemn-writing-vow! writing with you again has been an absolute pleasure. god, we should do this more often.

tag list ✨ – @virgiltheanxious, @pinkeasteregg, @toomuchstuffnotenoughcreativity, @the-anti-virgil, @ace-v-p-d, @minnie-sparkle, @too-precious-to-process, @freepaperie081, @whatwashernameagain, @adoratato, @ultimate-queen-of-fandoms2, @softprxnce, @migraine-marathon, @alana-of-the-cartwrights, @emo-sanders-sides-loving-unicorn, @thepusheenqueen, @at-least-seven-pretty-potatoes, @hanramz-the-fander, @atomicengineerdetective, @anony-phangirl, @keeshy-ekho, @samwantstobereal, @potatogirl309, @wentzdayz, @incrediblymanlytears, @generalfandom, @paradoxicalpatton, @poisonedapples :), @michealawithana, @pasteliosis, @microsoft-nerd, @theinsanem, @blinded-by-nobody, @taylorharmonies, @axyzel, @29-cupsofyogurt, @grey-lysander, @russian-radiation-station, @razberrypuck, @leafyhill910, @a-lexicon-of-words, @uh-r00d, @definenormalifyoucan, @yeet-me-dad, @misslilidelaney, @corruptedicon, @patton-loves-coloring, @bubblycricket, @i-am-not-a-feeling, @froggyfun27, @penguins-in-turquoise-scarves, @insanityandimperfection, @spacenerrrd, @hissesssss, @pattongirl, @your-username-is-unavailable, @midknight-mania, @wandering-wondering-aimlessly, @crofters-junkie, @hi-disappointed-im-daughter, @peanut0303, @applecannibal, @fandoms-winkitywonk, @illiani, @teenageengineerobservation, @koalaaquabear, @aceofhearts567, @davidthetraveler

((disclaimer: my tag system is a Mess™️ so if ur url is here and it shouldn’t be/you don’t want it to be, or if you want to be on the tag list and ur not on it, pls send me an ask !! thank u ^-^))

read on AO3 if you’d like ^-^

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“yellow roses = associated with the sun and its life-giving warmth; friendship”

~*~

‘It’s quiet. It’s too quiet.

Say something.

It’s quiet, and it’s dark,

and you’re alone, and–’

“Here we are!” Roman announced, flicking on the light switch with his elbow, turning around, and peering over the box he was holding. His bright smile snapped Patton out of his thoughts. “Welcome to my kingdom!”

Logan rolled his eyes. “Where can we situate ourselves?”

“Dinah’s probably sleeping in my room, so boxes can go in the guest room, Buzzed Light-kill,” Roman huffed. He looked over at Virgil and smiled. “You want to help Logan, mi amor? I would do it myself, but–”

“Boxes would snap your noodle arms,” Virgil said smugly. He nodded, grabbing the box out of Roman’s arms. “I’ll take care of it.”

Roman placed a hand on his chest dramatically, his mouth falling into a little ‘o’. “My arms are not noodles! I just– have other important things to do…” He finished lamely as Virgil and Logan made their way to the guest room. ‘Oh well. Mission Failed. We’ll get ‘em next time. Back to the most important issue’.

Roman turned around and smiled kindly at Patton.

“Let’s embark on a grand adventure to the kitchen, shall we?” Roman extended his hand, sweeping into a low bow. “Fulfill our quest for that hot chocolate?”

‘Say something.’ Patton swallowed down a lump in his throat as he stared at Roman’s hand.

“Sure.” Even his own voice sounded small. Weak. He decided it’d be best to not say anything else. He tried not to notice the fall in Roman’s smile. Now you’ve disappointed him. Made him worry about you. Idiot!

“Fantastic!” Roman said, almost without missing a beat. He straightened himself up once more and took Patton’s hand. And Patton did not flinch, no he did not. “Let’s be on our merry way!”

“Please be careful, will you?” Logan’s voice sounded as if it were miles behind them now. It also sounded sad.

“To infinity and beyond!” Roman exclaimed instead, skipping to the kitchen and dragging Patton beside him.

“Why won’t you smile, Patty dearest?”

Patton didn’t know why.

-------------------

The hot chocolate grew cold on the counter.

“I’m not sure standing here is going to help,” Logan offered, rather unhelpfully if Roman could say anything about it. “Are you going to give it to him or not?”

“I will, calm yourself,” Roman muttered, his tapping on the counter speeding up. (He was tapping in 5/4 time, what has he become?)

Logan looked over at Virgil, who was peering through the kitchen window that gave a view into the living room. Following his gaze, he noticed Patton was still sitting on the couch Roman had left him on, staring wordlessly at The Tigger Movie on the TV. He peered back at the hot chocolate. “It’s gone rather cold, too.”

“I just don’t know what to do.” Roman continued to tap his finger on the counter, pointedly ignoring Logan at this point, since he’s hardly getting to the point. Out of principle.

“He’s never not bounced to ‘Round My Family Tree’ before,” Virgil noted, continuing to stare at Patton with a certain kind of astonishment. Logan sighed.

“Well one of us is going to have to do something,” Logan stated. “We can’t just leave him there alone for a lengthened period of time.” A pause. More quietly, Logan adds, “He’s done that enough.”

Roman glared at him. The tapping intensified. “I’m doing everything I can, Logan.”

“He’s just...staring at it.” Virgil spoke even quieter now.

“We can’t just continue to do nothing,” Logan pointed out once more. “Someone needs to talk to him.”

“Why don’t you do it, Pointdexter?” Roman hissed. “He clearly won’t want to talk to any of us. I’m sure you can Fix-it...Felix.”

Logan looked at him incredulously. “Pardon?”

“Junior,” Virgil quipped lightly. A beat of silence before the joke finally registered, by the look of faint disgust on Logan’s face.

“Ah, I see.” Logan pushed up his glasses. “I suppose I was mistaken beforehand. Someone needs to talk to him other than Roman.”

“I’m trying to help!” Roman protested. “I started the conversation, I made him hot chocolate–”

“That you haven’t given him,” Logan interrupted.

“I put on some Disney," Roman soldiered on, ignoring Logan’s point. “Like, come on! This is the formula to a happy-pappy Patton!”

“Guys,” Virgil finally said, a bit more firmly this time. He spun around on his heel and faced Logan and Roman, rubbing the bridge of his nose. “Look, how about Logan, you just bring the hot chocolate to the kitchen and sit with Patton until we’re there. You don’t have to talk to him, at least just watch the movie with him. Okay?”

Logan looked over at Patton, who was now hugging a pillow to his chest with the same, blank stare at the TV. He sighed, but nodded anyway, grabbing the hot chocolate and making his way to the living room.

When he was gone, Roman glared at Virgil.

“What gives?” he hissed quietly. “You told me I was doing great! This is me...doing great!”

“Yeah, at a distraction,” Virgil said, nervously looking over at the living room as he watched Logan take a seat beside Patton. He shook his head. “Though I’m starting to think we’re running out of distractions.”

“No doi!” Roman said, almost exasperated. “That’s the issue, Christopher Rob-him...of…” A pause. Roman scrunched his face up in frustration. “Look, all my brain power is going towards solutions,” Roman rambled. “Don’t give me problems, give me solutions, Christopher Rob-him-of-solutions! Him being...him being– being me!” He pointed wildly at Virgil and triumphantly blurted out, “A-ha!”

Silence. Virgil rolled his eyes.

“Wow.” Virgil shook his head. “My point is that…” He took a deep breath. “I’m starting to think that maybe distracting him so that he can be temporarily happy isn’t what he needs right now.”

“I don’t want to see him sad either!” Roman protested.

“Well, none of us do,” Virgil shot back. “But maybe we need to push that aside for him. He needs to be sad; the one thing we can give him right now is some company to be...sad in.”

Roman said nothing. Virgil sighed, looking over at Patton, who was now crying into Logan’s shoulder. The movie had been long forgotten.

“It’s hard seeing him like this,” Virgil said quietly. “It’s harder knowing that he was hurting. I was standing right in front of the person who hurt him and I did nothing.”

Roman’s face softened. “There was nothing else you can do, mi pequeño rayo. You said what you wanted to say.”

“Not everything,” Virgil muttered. “There was loads I could’ve said. Maybe more I could’ve done there too.” He averted his glance from Roman. “I wanted nothing more than to rip her to shreds for ever making Patton feel like...like this.”

Roman took a step closer to Virgil. “I know.”

“He doesn’t deserve it.” Virgil’s voice trembled. “It’s a horrible feeling– to know you’ve done so much to make something work. Realizing that what you’ve had for so long wasn’t even love to begin with– it’s a horrible, horrible feeling.”

“I know.” The words slip out before Roman could stop it. Virgil looked at him with wide eyes and Roman blinked.

What was he doing? Roman’s thoughts raced. He needed to be whatever they need right now; why was he not doing that?

He needed to be their hero.

Not this. Not now.

Roman tugged at the hem of his sleeve.

“Maybe you’re right,” Roman finally said. He straightened. “He needs not to be saved — but supported.” He smiled. “I can do that.”

Virgil frowned. “We can do that. Okay?”

Silence.

“Of course, love,” Roman stated simply.

And with that, Roman tapped Virgil’s cheek softly before heading to the living room to accompany Patton. Virgil watched him as he left.

He couldn’t help but stare at Roman’s arm, the scene of him tugging down at his sleeve lingering in his head.

“I know.”

Virgil bit the inside of his lip. It’s a horrible, horrible feeling.

-------------------

When Logan sat down beside Patton, all Patton could hear in his head was “say something.”

“I, um–” Logan cleared his throat, presenting Patton with a soft blue, tartan patterned mug with angel wings on it. “Roman made you hot chocolate. Marshmallows and all.” He frowned. “Though I am afraid it is rather cold now. And the marshmallows have melted.”

A pause, before Logan promptly offered a small smile, holding the cup a little more towards Patton, who just stared at it.

“Why can’t you grateful for once?!”

“Thanks,” he said softly, taking the cup and holding it on his lap. Logan nodded, and the two fell into silence once more. Patton watched as Logan took a glance at the TV. ‘Fill the silence, fool!’

“I simply do not understand the premise of this movie,” Logan finally said, clearing his throat. Patton could see the haze of orange and black reflected onto his glasses. “Why are all the characters wearing those...costumes? I am almost certain that Winnie the Pooh does not look like that.”

Patton forced a quiet laugh.

“They’re trying to make Tigger happy,” he responded softly. He tried to ignore the way Logan looked back at him (stupid, stupid, stupid) and instead fixed his stare on the movie.

“Patton,” he heard Logan say quietly. “I– we are here for you. You are...you are aware of that, yes?”

Patton felt numb at the words. He shouldn’t need to be taken care of.

“I don’t know how I never...how I never saw it, you know?” Patton’s voice barely broke above a whisper. He can’t help but laugh, despite it sounding so broken. “I’m a bit silly, aren’t I?”

“Patton,” Logan said, almost sternly. He placed a hand on his knee, and Patton tensed up at the sudden contact. “You are not at fault for this.”

Patton said nothing.

“Now, you’re not going to cry, are you, Patty?”

“It doesn’t really matter.” He bit his lip. “It doesn’t matter anymore because– because it’s over, isn’t it?”

“Pat…”

“I messed everything up, even if– even if you think I didn’t.” Logan’s heart broke at Patton’s feeble attempts of breaking into some kind of an optimistic smile. “And now I lost...well, everything.”

“Falsehood. We have at least four boxes full of your things. Furthermore–” Logan added gently– “you are here.” Safe.

“Doesn’t make me any less lost,” Patton replied, his voice breaking. He swallowed down a sob when Logan didn’t respond.

“Lo,” he murmured, his voice suddenly smaller.

“Yes, Patton?”

A pause.

“What if that was it?” Patton finally asked. Before Logan could cut in, Patton continued. “What if she was all I had?” He looked at Logan with wide, teary eyes. “What if she was my soulmate?”

Logan frowned. Silence filled the room for a few seconds as Patton’s question lingered in the air.

“Patton,” Logan decided to say, “I am not in the business of believing that such errant frivolities such as soulmates exist.”

Patton bit back a sob.

“So I’m alone.” He broke into a laugh; this one more strained than before. “I’m sorry, Logan. I just...I don’t think that helps. Not now, at least.”

“No, the intention of my statement was not to make you...upset.” Logan cleared his throat. “It is a mere belief of mine, I think.” He took a deep breath. “I do not believe soulmates exist because it is preposterous to believe that there is one person for everyone. There are simply just...the right people. That is why people are able to be happy, alone or with significant others — their existences are not dependent on another being, nor are they incomplete until they find that person.”

He sighed. “There are just the right people, Patton; people who improve you and allow themselves to grow alongside you.” Patton averted his glance from him and Logan added, more hesitantly, “The universe is too intelligent as to not have another plan for you. It is…ineffable.”

Silence.

“Thank you, Logan,” Patton said his voice numb; “but you are wrong.”

Logan found himself speechless. Patton continue to force his stare away from Logan in the hopes of hiding the tears rolling down his cheeks.

“Y-You’re wrong,” he said again, “because I couldn’t change.”

“Patton–” Logan sputtered out.

“It’s true, okay?” Patton felt himself shake at every word. “I couldn’t change– who’s to say I could change for anyone else? Who’s to say that I’ll be able to change for the right person too?” Pathetic, you’re being pathetic, stop stop stop stop.

“Patton–”

“God, where am I even going to go?”

“I’m not wrong.” Logan huffed. “You’ll stay with…me, I suppose. If you’re amenable– ah, willing.”

“And then what?” Patton cried, exasperated. Logan’s mouth snapped closed. “Logan, what if I wait and wait and wait and then realize too late that she was my last chance?”

Patton bit his lip, tears blurring his vision.

“I-I’m just so scared.” He can’t stop the sob from escaping. “Logan, what if I can’t live without her?”

And that was the breaking point.

Logan’s body structure tensed, yet his walls crumbled; as Patton collapsed onto his shoulder and began to cry. He could feel the tears stain his shirt and it took all of his will power not to cry with him.

He instead took Patton’s wrist and felt for his pulse, making an affirming noise.

“As I thought.” Patton looked up at him, sniffling.

“What?”

“Place your hand over your heart.”

“Why?” Logan sighed at Patton’s blank stare.

“Just do it.”

Patton slowly did as Logan said.“What…” He looked confused. Logan looked at him softly.

“Do you feel your heartbeat? It’s steady.”

“I don’t understand–”

“You’re living,” Logan interrupted. “You are alive, and she’s not here.” Patton sniffled a bit, letting out a strangled half-laugh. Logan’s heart fluttered with the small victory.

“It’s not the same, really. But thanks.” Patton said softly, leaning back against Logan.

Logan’s mind raced for how to respond or if it would be too much, but was saved by Roman resting his head against Patton, wrapping him into a hug. Virgil soon came to sit beside Roman, reaching to hold Patton’s hand.

No one said anything as the movie faded out of their attention.

And it was quiet.

-------------------

The morning came and went without any of them noticing it. Logan—who just watched as the little group that surrounded Patton drifted off to sleep as the night passed him—came to terms with the fact that he would just not be going to work. He could afford one day, after all.

He took the liberty of texting Thomas on Roman’s phone that Roman would not be at work; and every now and then Dinah would make her way into the living room, jumping onto the space beside Logan. She was a gorgeous cat, Logan noted — though by the looks of how Patton’s sniffles turned into sneezes in his sleep, she probably couldn’t stay for that long.

As he continued his mindless thoughts, a dull headache beginning to build up—‘Never again, I’m never drinking again’—he felt his phone buzz twice beside him.

Careful not to wake anyone up, he slowly reached over for his phone and pulled it towards him. Without really looking at the sender, he slid open the first new message.

From: Jen | 7:01 am

Hey, sorry for how long this took. But good news! Turns out ur still smart as heck and the flower TOTALLY WORKED. Obviously not magic, but still pretty close! :D :D Let’s grab some coffee soon and talk, nerd <3

Logan smiled half-heartedly on the screen. He had forgotten to update Jen about the state of his little ‘project’ and wasted her time, god, why does he just do everything wrong?.

Beside him, he suddenly heard the faint sound of Patton’s steady breathing, turning to see Roman’s head slowly drop against his chest. Virgil’s hand was still tightly locked around Patton’s.

And Patton was quiet. And Patton looked...at peace.

If there is anyone who is smart, he typed back, it would be you. It is a complete wonder that you figured it out, and I look forward to meeting with you for said coffee in order to learn your method of how you did so. What day works for you?

He pressed send without thinking about it too hard; it’s time, after all, to change.

And as the golden sun poured through Roman’s curtains, a new thought filled Logan’s mind

as he drifted off to sleep.

You’re going to have to read the other text eventually, you know.

-------------------

a/n- reblogs, likes, whatever — i love ‘em all! thank you for reading, mes amies; hope u enjoyed it <33

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#sanders sides fanfic #sanders sides #thomas sanders #logicality #prinxiety #logan/patton #roman/virgil #logic/morality #creativity/anxiety #logan sanders patton sanders #roman sanders #virgil sanders #logic #morality #creativity #anxiety #flower shop AU #gabbie writes things #golden slumbers fic

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