#anyways i think shen yuan inadvertently gave bingmei self-hatred issues

[mxtxfanatic]

I don’t think that Luo Binghe just hates himself enough that he’s willing to overlook Shen Qingqiu’s early abuse of him in svsss. On the contrary, I think that lbh’s willingness to see good in Shen Yuan’s sqq despite that early childhood abuse done by Shen Jiu (who we are never told he knows is separate from Shen Yuan’s sqq) is because 1) Shen Yuan transmigrated when lbh was juuuuuust young enough to still (at least partially) believe that it was his own actions that made people like or dislike him, so sqq’s sudden flip to treating him well validated his idea that doing well = being treated well, and 2) he, like everyone else, assumed it was sqq’s qi deviation that changed sqq’s personality, so why should he hold a grudge against someone who may not even remember their previous actions and shows no signs of returning to them, especially when he had not gone through the event that cemented his pidw version’s commitment to repaying harm with 100x worse harm?

But on that note, sqq then throwing him into the abyss in Shen Yuan’s timeline both 1) breaks lbh of his belief that doing well = being treated well by forcing him to contend with the idea that someone may hate him for who he is, regardless of his actions and 2) leads him to believe that he is the cause of sqq’s abuse of him, because why else would his otherwise loving shizun who used to abuse him but then suddenly stopped try to murder him out of nowhere after discovering that he is a demon but after telling him that demons are not inherently evil? Must be a him problem, right? (On the other hand, the abyss scene in pidw is what showed bingge the truth that sqq’s abuse of him was never justified or about anything lbh ever did/didn’t do).

#svsss #anyways i think shen yuan inadvertently gave bingmei self-hatred issues #along a vein that bingge was probably able to avoid #not to say he didn’t still have them but they had a different source #and would have presented differently from bingmei’s #human metas mxtx