#and then i also think. demigirl does fit me because i dont fully feel like a girl and i dont fully feel nonbinary i am just kind of | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

autistic-beshelar · 3 years

Text

my. Opinions. on trans gener mighty nein

fjord: trans man. didn't have any inkling he was a trans man until he was almost an adult. i feel like i dont belong? oh that is because i am disabled. oh i feel like i dont fit in with the other girls? that is bc i am a half orc. yes. realising he was trans was BIG fucking freak out times. one of the many reasons he was so fond of vandren was bc vandren was one of the first people that fully supported him in transitioning. also he picked fjord bc it was a sea themed name and he's a fucking dweeb.

beau: trans woman. knew real young. super fucking adamant about it. her family was accepting, but in a very 'but you have to act like a Proper Lady' kind of way. got super angry about being made to wear dresses and make up all the time and swore she hated anything girly whatsoever, in a very 'fuck your expectations of me' kind of way. one of the things that made her feel a little more at home than she expected with the cobalt soul in the early days is that they never cared about her being trans outside of making sure she had whatever she needed to transition safely. she also got to talk to other trans folks which she'd never had before.

caleb: his gender. is dirt wizard. if you ask him he will say that he is a man. that's as much of an answer as you're getting. but actually his gender is more kind of ??? ehh... probably not. but is he a trans man u ask. did u transition caleb. whats ur agab. well wouldn't you like to know weatherboy.

nott: haha cissie (except maybe not but shh she’s too busy having her identity wrapped up in being a Wife and Mother)

jester: her gender is SPRINKLES! her gender is STARS! her gender is UNICORNS! jester is behind every single one of those wild fucking gender lists you have seen on tumblr dot com. her gender is a fairly steady experience of 'girl adjacent but with lots of sparkly bits on top'. it's okay if you just see her as a girl. that just means you're sadly not cool enough to see all the sparkles. she is very very confident in her gender and always has been, and though she's felt the same pretty much since birth she's always had fun finding different ways to express herself, and marion has always helped, and suggested things, and celebrated how confident and creative jester is

caduceus: agender. what's a gender? he does not know. he knows it exists, because one does not simply have so many siblings* without knowing and supporting and loving trans people, but he does not understand it in much the same way that he has not fully grasped how condensation works. he is positive gender is very real. he is also positive he does not have one. gender is simply not made for caduceuses. the wildmother did not think he needed a gender so she did not give him one. he will call himself a man and use he/him because it is simpler and because he really does not care, and has never really cared what people think of him anyway. if you asked him if he'd prefer they/them he would do a big grin and say oh that's nice because really it is thoughtful of u to ask! but no he is fine. he is simply vibing.

molly: a kaleidoscope of gender. he’s a man, and a woman, and both, and neither, and something else all together, and he’s always a mixture of some or all of those things all at once but never just one at a time. a lot of gender happens to mollymauk. do not ask him specifics that requires introspection and that is scary. he simply knows gender is happening and that today is a skirt day

yasha: demigirl. she's never felt much of a connection to womanhood. she's not... not a woman, and she's not something else, and she's not nothing, but she is a woman in the way that rain is a storm - something approaching it, but not really, not completely.

bonus npcs:

yeza: sorry so sorry i lost my gender in a lab accident uh oh dear um i think it must be around here somewhere

essek: hahahaha. you think a cis could pull off that cloak? u think hot boi mcgee with his 12 step skin care routine is cis? you say ‘hey what’s ur gender’ and he says ‘oh probably’ and you go ‘what?’ and he says ‘oh sorry you misheard. my gender is probability.’

dairon: she is bigender. she is a woman and agender at the same time. that's how cool she is.

marion: the best trans mom to the best trans daughter. growing up trans was not easy for her and she made damn sure her child had a much better experience.

#matt mercer told me all of this in a dream so it is canon in fact #critical role #mighty nein #i simply cannot tag every character here i am just small

43 notes · View notes

ghostofcitrus · 3 years

Text

hmmmmmmmmmm. very gender.

so.... i think here’s a good metaphor

gender=clothes. not actual clothes, this isn’t about fashion, clothes are a metaphor for how i’m trying to process gender.

i feel like girlhood is a not quite uncomfortable garment of clothing. i was given it at birth. i grew up in it. it’s served me well.

but it’s not the real clothes that i was born in. the more i start to remove aspects of the “girl” outfit... the less comfortable it is when i have to put it back on. the more frequently im upset by it.

i like some of it. an accessory here or there. but i also like accessories from the boy outfit. and i can look at myself in the girl clothes and say huh. looks good. but it doesn’t look like me. neither of them are the clothes i was born in.

wearing girlhood is like wearing clothes over top other clothes. it can be fine. i can deal with it. but it’s not actually comfortable. and when i realized i can take it off and just wear the first layer that i’m MEANT to wear.... putting it back on keeps getting harder. i start to realize all of the things that have been silently poking and suffocating me. it gets harder and harder to keep wearing.

but i can do it. i can shut my mind off to it, and just ignore that i’m wearing them at all. pretend it’s not there. dont look down at the clothes. don’t think about them. and i can be fine.

there’s certain parts of them that have been stuck to my body... even under the clothes i was born in. they make the right clothes not fit (see: tits.) and i want them gone. i want to be in the right clothes. i want people to see me in the right clothes.

but i keep clinging to the girl clothes. i’ve grown up in them. i’ve gotten all the way here with them. i’m scared that i’ll regret putting them away.

and i think to add to the confusion, i find both the girl and boy clothes attractive, and the girl clothes even more attractive than the boys. so i tried to make my own reflect that. but i think i just find it attractive... it’s just not mine though.

but when i take them off and just wear the original clothes.... wow does it feel amazing. i never want to go back. from what i know of them right now, it seems that the original clothes have some patches from both the girl and boy clothes pinned on comfortably and happily. they are not quite the original garment, but they’re stitched on and i quite like them there, at least right now.

but i always have to put the girl clothes back on. and it’s just habit now, i even sleep in them, not matter if they’re uncomfortable. and there’s parts that i just can’t take off, even when i want to, and i’m afraid that if i do i’ll have made a mistake and end up regretting it (see again: tits). and i’m so afraid that i won’t even be able to get the option of removing them. i’m afraid that the girl clothes are actually uncomfortable enough for them to not be my real clothes. im scared i won’t be accepted in my real clothes. i’m just afraid.

i don’t quite think i know the name of the original clothes yet. they’re nonbinary, but their label i can’t quite read yet. i’ll keep trying though. i think i won’t know until i’m able to stop holding onto the girl clothes. i won’t let myself let go of them, even though i want to. i want to put them down and embrace whatever is truly there. but i’m scared of doing that, and so the girl clothes are all tangled up in the real clothes and i can’t really tell exactly what’s what, not yet. i want to. i really do. but i need to be patient and keep trying, and i need some support to help me untangle them, i think. and understand what’s actually causing me discomfort, and how much, and vice versa for happiness.

but most of the labels i’ve tried to apply to the real clothes don’t quite seem right. demigirl feels too close to girl, and i don’t think agender is right because i do have clothes! there’s not none there! and again... i can’t really tell where my girl clothes stop and my real clothes begin right now. the more often i take off the girl clothes tho...the less and less i see there, tangled up. i’m sure there’s a word out there for this! there’s so many words... i can’t imagine there not being one!

gah! this is kinda frustrating... but i think it’s a good metaphor. i hope it makes sense. im kinda tired but want to post it now...it’s not fully perfectly fleshed out and i don’t detail my entire gender experience of course, but this is just how i’m feeling right now. i feel like i keep learning more about myself and the last post i posted about it isn’t even right anymore!! but i’m just taking off the girl clothes more and starting to realize im wearing my own clothes underneath.

as always, i welcome any comments on this post. in fact, i want them!!!!!

#my post #citrus speaks #citrus gender crisis #if u have any thoughts pls pls share!#turns out finding words pretty isn’t what makes u that word #lmaooo #non-binary #nonbinary #questioning gender #gender questioning #demigirl #lgbtq #demigender

9 notes · View notes

groundramon · 7 years

Text

...what kind of opinion would my characters have on nonbinary identities, and if none of them would already be bigoted towards the idea, can I make a character into the nonbinary equivalent of a bigot

these are the kinds of things my brain thinks about and because I have no self restraint, I’m going to answer for all of my characters (under a read more tag because this’ll probably get long)

also if you dont want to see my characters as anything other than all-loving and innocently liberal beans, then you mayyyy not wanna read this, but I mean I’m nonbinary/agender and I still love these guys regardless so //thumbs up

Mich, at any point within EOTP’s story, doesn’t even know nonbinary identities are a thing. I’m sure he’d eventually hear about it somewhere, but he probably would just dismiss it as some internet fad and not think twice about it. If he was presented with the idea and had it fully explained to him, though, I dont think he’d quite understand it. Mich probably would learn not to be transphobic/homophobic because Llabu is gay and trans (have I said that officially before? idk but it’s official now) and wouldn’t put up with his shit, but obviously more people know about transgender mtf or ftm people than nonbinary people and Llabu probably wouldn’t bother explaining it to him since it doesnt concern her and she may not even agree with the sentiment, who knows. So yeah, he just wouldn’t understand it. But Mich also doesn’t like pissing people off, so if he knew someone who was nonbinary and didn’t respond to he/him or she/her pronouns, he’d probably just avoid using pronouns with them altogether. If someone took the time to gently walk him through it, he might warm up to the idea, though; Mich does lean liberal politics-wise, and depending on how interested he got into social rights, he may or may not also gain a respect for nonbinary identities.

Sarah’s in the same boat as Mich; she just doesn’t know what they are, and probably wouldn’t care to try and understand them. Like Mich, she isn’t intentionally going to go after people who identify as nonbinary and harass them; she just doesn’t understand it. UNLIKE Mich, she might still use binary pronouns for them, but if the person called her out multiple times then she’d finally get it through her skull to stop. Also unlike Mich, Sarah doesn’t lean liberal (I dont think, anyways, but that may change) so she has less likelyhood of gaining respect for them later in life. But she still wouldn’t care what people do in their own free time, so long as it doesn’t hurt others, so she wouldn’t hate nonbinary people or anything

Out of all the Oneiromon characters, it feels weird to say that Devin’s the one most likely to accept nonbinary identities. I’m still trying to get a read on how he’d act when he’s older, but he seems like he’d have an interest in representing minority groups within the already-minority LGBT+ community (AKA nonbinary people, pansexual people, asexual people, ect) whether because that’s just the kind of guy he is or because he actually identifies as one of those things. During the story he has no idea what the hell nonbinary identities are, though, but he’d be accepting of the idea if he was approached with it.

Llabu, well, I’m not entirely sure about her. Given that she’s trans herself, it’d be kind of weird if she didn’t support them, buuuut on the other hand those kinds of people exist, so I mean... I feel like she’d either support them in spirit but not actively orrr she’d be the harshest on them out of all the Oneiromon characters because she thinks nonbinary people give a bad name to “actual” transgender people. Idk man, I dont WANT her to be anti-nonbinary but it feels like that’d be in her political views D:

And I’ll just say, for the rest of the revealed Oneiromon cast so far: Oneiromon are naturally accepting of nonbinary identities by nature, so Triopmon, Amp, Ron, Lily, Velvet, and Astrea (despite being a day old lmfao) all accept nonbinary identities as just as valid as any other gender. Oneiromon identifying as nonbinary is still pretty rare, but given that gender is entirely a choice in the Oneiromon world and you can pretty much change it at any time, and they’re all born sexless anyways, they wouldnt have a problem with it.

Luce wouldn’t have a problem with nonbinary identities and would probably support them if asked, but not actively campaign for ‘em. Luce also has his own problems so it’s possible he would be more passionate about it if he had any passion left in him at all.

Since Grace’s dad is bigoted to every LGBT+ identity because he’s a hardcore Christian, and Grace will do literally anything to spite her father, Grace would support nonbinary identities. Not only would she just...not care...but again, she’d do anything to spite her father. That’s not exactly being a good ally but it’s still...a thing...I guess

Shawn, out of all the characters I listed, would probably be the biggest advocate of nonbinary rights. I mean, she probably identifies as a demigirl (given that she’s loosely based on 13-year-old me [who did technically identify as a demigirl but didn’t bother mentioning it because i used the same pronouns anyways] except more lovable and also smarter, even though Shawn is still a fucking idiot) but beyond that, she’d be a big supporter of equal rights for all sexes, races, genders, sexualities, ect. She’s one of those people who put same-sex relationships on a pedestal, if thats any consolation (not “omg its so sinful aaaa im sinning1111″, but “omg theyre so cuuuute I’m going to ship everything gay even if they’re in a heterosexual relationship/the creator has flat-out said that they’re straight and not bi or pan”) And she’d worship a character who came out as nonbinary in mainstream media tbh

Hunter’s uneducated. Like Mich and Sarah, he wouldn’t really understand it. But given that it means a lot to three of his friends, he’d at least try to understand it. He wouldn’t succeed, but he would try, and would do his best to use the right pronouns. He’d probably be that guy who fucks up all the time though, and apologizes a lot when you tell them that they used the wrong pronouns |D

Annnd finally, the last one I’ll write because holy shit its after midnight, Corey. For some reason I feel like Corey’s saying “nah nah, enough with that made-up shit” when it comes to nonbinary identities, but I dont know w h y he’d say that. Like, I dont know his thought process behind it; all the others just dont understand it, but I know Corey would be smart enough to comprehend it. Maybe...he’d do it to try and fit in with Hunter’s friends? I feel like Hunter’s friends would be assholes who say “lol nonbinary? what the fuck are those tumblrinas doing!!! XDDD” (I know I say stuff like that myself, but shhhhhh dont tell anyone) and Corey would’ve picked up on that overtime. Corey would only actively attack a nonbinary person to make himself look cool.

And I’m not going to bother writing for my ever-expanding roster of characters for Majjikku or Branching Paths, mostly because they dont come from the human world and I’d have to work out more about their culture before I answered this question for ‘em.

#stormy speaks

0 notes