#and if you have insurance & you're feeling absolutely fucking crushed by the system pls look up if they have a nurse advice line & call the

[laneaconite]

Treatment

“Take this pill,” They say.

Take this pill and it should work

 In a month,

                    Three months,

                                            Six.

Take this pill,

And it will make you tired.

                                        They all make you tired,

Because they act on the brain, 

                                                  You see.

Take this pill,

“We’re sorry the others didn’t work.”

We will smile

                    Sympathetically.

                                                 We do care.

Take this

            Pill.

                  It will make you dizzy.

Take this

            Injection.

                           Since it is treatment resistant

Now.

It will hurt,

                 It will make you itch.

You can still keep taking the old ones,

                                                         In case they end up working

                                                                                                          Too.

Take this pill,

                      It should work in one month,

                                                                    Three months,

Six.

No, we don’t know

                               Why this is happening.

We don’t know

                     How to fix it.

Your blood screening was

                                           Normal.

Your CT scan was

                                Normal.

Take this pill.

-Lane Aconite,

March 5th, 2023

#poetry #my work #lane archives #chronic pain #chronic migraines #chronic illness #this poem is still pretty ouch #the us medical system can really suck in its cyclical lack of progress regarding finding out what's “wrong” with a person #due to crazy long wait times for appointments & processing referrals as well as 4 profit health insurance #my chronic migraines had to escalate into epilepsy for me to be seen by an actual neurologist and be taken seriously & even now I still fee #neglected by the system #not because my drs are bad but because they're overloaded with patients #it's really exhausting & difficult to have to fight at every turn to receive the care we need & deserve when we're bent over in pain #in my experience this repetitive cycle really broke down my ability to advocate for myself for a while because I was just too depressed #but hey if you're reading this and you relate: I love you. You deserve to feel better and to be supported by your physicians #I'm getting better care now but healing isn't linear #and if you have insurance & you're feeling absolutely fucking crushed by the system pls look up if they have a nurse advice line & call the #to see if they're able to set up a complex care coordination plan & if the nurses themselves can set up appointments for you #it really helps to have an insurance lady or 3 you can call to set up appts & referrals or check on them to see where they're stuck #I could write a poem dedicated to all the wonderful women in social services who are literally saving my life every time they call