#and i love it and want to eventually compile my favorites of everything ive written but 😩😩😩 need that fictional romance expeditiously

[sensitiveaangel]

i still think about writing romance but i have no idea where to start. i read and see things that have such a profound effect on me and i want to create something like that !! human connection is so significant i want 2 encapsulate it in a short story or novel >:)

#i always write but its been so long since ive done fiction. i only journal/diary currently #and i love it and want to eventually compile my favorites of everything ive written but 😩😩😩 need that fictional romance expeditiously #murmurs in the august breeze

[kwamiwayzz]

citttrrruuuussssss

I don’t see enough of the meta when it comes to citrus so I decided to ask myself these questions after copying and pasting them from another blog cause why not >.> 

And I may be low key still trying to ignore my responsibilities

–

Main ship <3 Yuzu x Mei (i dont even think they have an actual ship name) 

I’m gonna cut it at a certain point cause I realized how much I was rambling 

• When or if I started shipping it:

Ah...surprisingly I didn’t start shipping these two until a few months ago. I’ve been following the manga since the day it came out and I’ve always liked them but I never actively “shipped” them or anything. Even though I went all “YeSSSSS” when they started dating in chapter 16, I was still just more of a casual fan.

There are a few reasons I can think of to why I was drawn into shipping them (finally...) was that I somewhat got back into yuri over the summer after watching a clip from Fate Kaleid.......*cough* anyway...and started going back on dynasty-scans to see what kinds of new yuris have been made huehuehue. Long story short I shortly got back into MadoHomu and Yuzu x Mei, and saw the latter ship as the “less angsty” version and went on from there 

The other reason I got super into them was that the latest few chapters, and remembering chapter 24, was that I really started to notice how Mei became less cold and closed-off from Yuzu. And seeing her blush and be all nervous around her was just..... <3 <3 <3~~~~~~

Oh and this one comic by smxmuffinpeddling made me laugh (and still makes me laugh) so it spiraled from there. They are a blessing to Citrus. 

• My thoughts:

I tend to gravitate towards ships that have that dark/light dynamic. I’m cliche and I have a weakness for ships that have the aloof dark haired girl who’s usually looked up to or very popular fall in love with the ditzy, but kind and optimistic light haired girl and vice versa (see: Chikane/Himeko, MadoHomu, Diakko {to an extent}) Not exactly opposites attract, but I found their interactions funny when they initially hated each other and whenever I read the manga in retrospect in my head I’m all, “honey you two have no idea” 

i like ships where i can see a little of myself in both characters 

• What makes me happy about them:

I understand that the pseudo-incest thing can turn some people off from the pairing but in this story I feel like it’s justified enough that pretty much the whole fandom is cool with it. Yuzu and Mei didn’t grow up together nor are they blood related, but taking the “they’re not related by blood” justification out of the way while the kiss that Mei stole from Yuzu is what led to Yuzu developing feelings for her step-sister, Yuzu already started showing some sort of attraction in chapter 1 when Mei hugged her to just to get her cellphone. So, kiss or no kiss, Yuzu probably would’ve developed a crush on Mei regardless. As for Mei, the step-sister thing forced the seemingly-opposite girls to interact and it’s what led to Yuzu finding out all these things about Mei and help her with her issues. So, I think the fact that Yuzu would go great lengths for her is what would lead her to falling for her.

I really like how Yuzu doesn’t give up on Mei despite Mei always having to push her step-sister away. As much as I love Yuzu and do relate with her on a spiritual level, I do relate with Mei a lot (despite some friends saying I’m more like Yuzu lol). Anyone else who would try to get close with Mei would either get tired of her for being so closed-off and eventually just give up on her. I like the fact that Yuzu does see a lot of the good in Mei that she can’t see in herself. The whole dynamic of the closed-off, pessimistic, sometimes brooding person with the open, optimistic, never-gives-up person is a common dynamic I’ve seen everywhere and I happen to be one of those people that really do like it (at least if done right to an extent or I relate on a certain level) and also reminds me of sasuke and naruto despite never shipping that *cough* but anyway...

Plus, I remember smxmuffinpeddling mentioning this in the tags of one of their fics, but I really do like how both of them put in a lot of work to make their relationship work. Yeah, sure it seemed like Yuzu was doing all the work in the beginning, but as soon as Mei began to open up and trust Yuzu more, she does try to put in genuine effort in maintaining their relationship (using Yuzu’s notebook as a perfect date template, when she talked with Yuzu in chapter 24 that their relationship has nothing to do with other people’s opinions, asked Harumi for advice on how to start a conversation with Yuzu in the vol. 7 extra, being open to Yuzu’s offer of the one kiss a day thing, and i wish to see many more things~)

• What makes me sad about them:

Need I explain...

*Sigh* as much I love these two, I just want them to interact more with words. Like have more casual conversations. It could be the mundane things or about any problems or issues they could be having. I live for healthy communication, and I feel like Yuzu and Mei are still working up to that.

• Things done in art/fic that annoys me:

So...finding actual fan content of these two, let alone for Citrus in general is like treading through the Sahara fucking Desert 

I haven’t really found anything concrete in art/fic that annoy me...yet but the most I’ll say is making both of them unreasonably OOC. This fandom is pretty small despite citrus apparently being a super popular yuri manga (I really didn’t know that until recently) so OOCness isn’t too much of a problem. I used to be heavily into the Frozen fandom so of course when you have a larger fandom you’re going to have a crap ton of fan interpretations and lots of AUs that either don’t fit or drive the characters being written about to be OOC.

• Things I look for in art/fic:

Lots of fluff cause we don’t get enough of it in the manga TT_TT 

If it’s just them talking or having a date or something mundane that allows them to get to know each other more then sign me the fuck up. I like seeing fics that go into Mei’s perspective and I’m also a huge fan of content that really showcases the support they have for one another because feels~

In fact here’s some fics I’ve read that show some of this stuff I’ve mentioned: 

citrus schtuffs by angel0wonder (literally anything written by smx/angel0wonder bless them)

 Citrus - A Compilation by mikotyzini

The Adventures of Mei and Yuzu by mikotyzini 

Citrus: Fantasies by epitomeodisaster (i literally don’t remember if i read this one but so far it has what i mentioned earlier)

Sweet and Sour by Cynical-Banshee (words cannot describe how much I love the writing style and characterization of Mei and Yuzu in this fic, it has almost everything I’m looking for that the manga doesn’t have enough of...and chapter 5...*dies*) 

that’s all i can think of for now, but despite low numbers of content most of the stuff ive come across so far is pretty good 

• Who I’d be comfortable them ending up with, if not each other: 

For Yuzu, I wanna say Harumin only because they’re best friends and she’s always got Yuzu’s back and stuff and I know some people in the fandom already highkey ship them...however (yeah I’m gonna be one of those people ^^;), in the story I feel like it would be a bit cheap having Harumi secretly have feelings/fall for her best friend because while I was used to the yuri cliches when I first read the manga, I personally feel like the story is already far in Yuzu and Mei’s relationship that adding more unnecessary third party drama would kinda be tiresome to me. That’s not saying I’m not open to it. If Saburouta does something new or different with the whole “best friend is in love with main protagonist” cliche that I’ve seen in other yuri like Strawberry Panic, then I wouldn’t mind reading it. 

For Mei...this is gonna sound like a weird answer, but I’d probably go with Matsuri. Part of the reason just being that they do kinda share some similarities together (being alone most of their life, sometimes clinging to the one person they feel like they can trust a.k.a Yuzu), but I’m also bad at explaining shit so I’ll probably just leave it at that :P 

• My happily ever after for them:

THEY HAVE A KID (i think i came up with a concept for them having a son in my head but i never drew it...yet) 

and they live in a cozy apartment together. Mei being self-conscious about her parenting skills and Yuzu always reassuring her that she’ll be fine and she’ll support her in everything she’s having trouble with if Mei has no fucking clue how to show love and affection to a child, let alone her own. The girl already took awhile trying open up and show her love to Yuzu, so this would be a challenge lol 

Yuzu trying to reassure their kid that while his mother is pretty stubborn and has a hard time expressing her feelings, she loves them both very much <3~

• What is their favorite non-sexual activity?: 

TALKING/COMMUNICATION (wait that’s my favourite lol) 

I’m assuming that once they’re deep in their relationship, just sitting down and talking about the mundane things whether it’s about their day or ranting about whatever, would be something they would find relaxing. In the end, they’re still learning more about each other (and I fucking love that) 

oh and trying new things with each other. Yuzu would be the one dragging Mei to try out something they’ve never done before (I can’t think of any right now), Mei would probably be super competitive when it comes to getting the skill down in whatever they’re doing but of course Yuzu would tell her she doesn’t need to get so worked up and should just let loose and have fun

#i rambled so much its not even funny #like i live and breathe their dynamic #yuzu x mei #turtle speaks #citrus manga #citrus #mei x yuzu

[sovonight]

alright i’ve gone through the rest of blacklight journal 3 (and took some blurry pics which i’ve uploaded here! somewhat incomplete, but i was mainly going for the invisible ink content anyway. the ink has a hard time glowing when there’s black ink behind it-- it looks clear in person, i promise!)

and now my opinions,

reading through the whole book again: GOD I LOVE FORD SO MUCH

tho ford’s handwriting is as much of a pain to read as i remember. it’s only slightly less painful because i’ve read the journal before and know what to expect. tbh the kids’ entries were a breath of fresh air

some of the journal entries have been extended/embellished in non-invisible content, right? fancier paper can’t be the only thing that made the journal thicker, and there’s definitely stuff i don’t remember reading from the regular journal

yo ford brings up social interaction up a lot but like, at least he had college friends, plural

“This guy should spend less time reaping and more time at the gym!” i still can’t get over ford’s transition from scrawny nerd to buff nerd. who woulda thought.

it was nice to have the caesar/atbash/a1z26 ciphers written out! it holds little practical use, but i just think the tiny letters look cute

ford’s silly and i love him

“The thought that Earth is being used for extraterrestrial advertisement depresses me deeply” -- you and me both, bud. finally an opinion of ford’s pertaining to aliens that i can agree with

canon tarot card assignments! and some of them even line up with these

ford could possibly have been coming up with a catchy nickname for weirdmageddon for 30 whole years, and weirdmageddon is what he decided on. after 30 possible years of deliberation.

“I also tried to choose which theoretical physics books would be most fun to spend 50 years rereading, but they’re all so great I couldn’t decide!“ NERD

i sat there for a good 2 seconds until i decided that rather than the usual cipher, it must be a word scramble. then it made sense

“absolutely, unequivocally not” lollll

i want to see what ford was like when he was compiling journal 2. also, what on earth possessed him to leave his most dangerous journal at an elementary school? come on, man!

that lil frowny face

i trust that retina damage statement bc my eyes hurt from constantly flipping the lights on and off while trying to read ford’s passages

all post-finale fanfiction where ford does NOT eventually get bionic eyes is now non-canon-compliant

thank goodness, ford went straight for the newspapers. at least i got 1 headcanon right

god, ford, why would it be whales? it’d be octopuses! octopuses are where it’s at

“Air is great. Really can’t overemphasize how great air is“ god i love him

"Check out the Eurythmics’ latest chart-topper!” 1) oh thank goodness, now i know i could listen to his music, 2) finally someone else who uses s’ rather than s’s, 3) prepare for a world of disappointment my man because literally none of the things you’ve been listing is happening

i assumed that because i’d already decoded everything in the regular journal, i’d have decoded most of what’s in the blacklight version, so i mostly ignored the cryptograms this time around. if i’m wrong, though, that leaves a treat for future me!

a whole initiation ceremony and everything! ford knows what’s up

but honestly though, i decoded that last sentence at the end and tossed the blacklight onto my bed w a sound, smiling-- it’s official-feeling, you know? what a nice little addition. makes the silliness i feel in doing it feel unfounded

gf just brings this feeling of childhood & adventure & possibility that i haven’t rly had since like, elementary and middle school. and not just that, it makes me feel like there’s more out there and that feeling like there’s more isn’t...silly. it brought the magic back, u guys. i might cry.

again, i wish i’d had gravity falls as a kid, but i guess i’m close enough. and at least with this timing i get to drop $150 on a copy of my favorite character’s research journal! i needed a job to make this purchase

also, i saw the bit of discontentment around the journal numbers that went out (you know, whatever # out of 10000 and all that) and though i kind of did hope for lower digits since i ordered practically on the day it went up, the number i did get is pretty nice! sixes and ones, plus it’s reversible. i would’ve found something to like in any number i got, really. trying to exercise my optimism more

and using post-it notes to stick the photos/inserts back on is working out pretty well! thanks for the suggestion. they come off if i’m not careful enough when turning the page, but i’d rather they come off than stick forever haha. i wonder how they got the photos on so neatly in the first place? what a small margin for error

and there it is, back in its cozy packaging, ready to be buried in the forest somewhere!

ive appreciated the good times but it’s too expensive for me to regularly handle-- i’ll damage my regular copy of journal 3, thanks!

#blacklight journal 3 spoilers