#also to that guy that wanted me to draw jealous narrator i got a comic draft just for you ( sorry for taking so long )

[stranger-who-writes-fiction]

Gonna make full use of my ‘comic rant’ tag and roast Future State: Superwoman.

Spoilers! And yelling! Of the disgruntled kind!

So a few things at the start here: 1.) I wanted to love this book. I wanted it to be great. I wanted to give it the benefit of the doubt, in spite of some iffy stuff in the solicit text. So this rant is not coming from a place of having decided this was going to be awful ahead of time. 2.) My tolerance for bad Supergirl comics is pretty high! Takes a lot for me to actually come out and say that a particular issue is trash. Reader: This story is trash.

It’s not ‘middle-aged white guys writing/drawing a story about sending a minor to a potentially hostile planet fully nude’ trash, mind you. It’s the compost bin, rather than the landfill. Slightly nicer trash, but it still stinks to high heaven. Allow me to expand!

PROLOGUE - SUMMARY: ...I actually can’t summarize this comic b/c it would devolve into a lot of senseless yelling. We’ll just have to tease out this terrible plot as we go along. 

PART I - DEAD DOGS TELL BAD TALES: The comic opens with Kara standing at Krypto’s grave. That’s not why this comic is trash, but it bears mentioning. Because why. Why would you do this. 

PART II - IN WHICH IT ONLY GETS WORSE: So, Kara has a running inner monologue, and the main thing we gather from Kara’s thoughts is that it was Krypto who taught her to be a hero. On paper, that sounds very sweet! In practice, it reads as Kara having no moral center whatsoever—whatever good qualities she might possess, she did not learn from her parents, or her foster parents, or friends, or fellow heroes. Nor do they come from within Kara herself. Nope, t’was Krypto who taught Kara not to be a jealous rage monster. That is not hyperbole--Kara’s walking around angry about her cousin all the time and she’s like, ‘It was you, Krypto, who taught me not to judge, and to let go of anger.’ Listen, I love Krypto, but this? This is, as the youth would say, a bad look.

PART III - THOSE CERTAINLY ARE...SOME THEMES: The set-up here is that Kara is on the moon, and has established a sanctuary for alien refugees. That’s a dynamite idea! I love that! Buuuuut Kara didn’t look at the plight of alien refugees and say, ‘I want to help!’ Really, she didn’t even look at herself and say, ‘I don’t want others to feel like I’ve felt.’ No, she said, ‘Earth won’t accept me as a hero, and Clark didn’t name me protector of Earth, so. I’m out!’ (Honestly, if your moral compass is so whack that you need a dog to walk you back from Hulk-Smashing...can’t say I blame Clark for not picking you, Kara!) But apparently, the people on the moon don’t really like her either. And it is literally never explained why. There’s a whole montage of Kara fixing stuff and saving lives and all the moon folk just glare at her. This makes both the moon people AND Kara look like a**holes, because they come across as ungrateful, and she comes across as a glory hound. Thanks! I hate it! So the ‘peace’ Kara’s found on the moon isn’t really peaceful at all, cause she still resents her cousin, and people still don’t like her, in spite of the fact that she’s constantly performing acts of service for them. 

Also, side note, I’m just now realizing this is an entire population of alien refugees...and Kara is somehow still the odd one out. Like, Earth I get, because everyone else is a human and maybe freaked out by the super powers. But a bunch of aliens? WHY. Why did you do this. Why did this need to be set on the moon with alien refugees if you’re not going to interrogate Kara’s identity as an alien refugee herself AND all of the aliens are inexplicably humanoid in appearance and utterly ordinary in terms of power levels.  

Like. This is not the CW show, where they have a budget, and a huge ensemble cast to serve. YOU HAVE NO EXCUSE. AAARRRRRGHHHH.

PART III CONT’D: There’s also this weird ‘birthright’ element introduced...like, Clark and Jon stole Kara’s ‘right’ to be earth’s defender which is...a terrible reading of Kara’s modern origin. It brings in the idea that Kara is a ‘chosen one’ and because she didn’t get to be that chosen one, all of her hero work is for nothing. Never mind the whole central conceit of what makes Clark and Kara heroic...that they have this incredible power, and choose to do good with it. Nah...it’s all about her ‘right’ to protect the people of Earth! And mean ol’ Clark took that away! THANKS. I HATE IT. 

PART IV - A POOR USE OF SPACE: So, all of the Future State books kind of struggle with the issue of too much exposition, which is understandable. They have to introduce an entirely new status quo in a very limited amount of literal page space, so you *really* have to have a handle on how you allocate your time and focus.  

Introducing a brand new, lore-heavy heroic character who gets all of the development and dynamic art and pulls focus away from the character you’re meant to be writing is a bad use of a two issue limited series.

Like, this is a crappy Supergirl comic but it’s a great backdoor pilot for a Lynari ongoing, I guess. 

Imagine if in the Jon Superman book, they introduced a random, brand new best friend for Jon, and he got the big character arc instead of Jon. That’s something you save for an arc in an ongoing title, NOT A TWO ISSUE EVENT COMIC.  

Back to said new character, there’s a lot of forced attempts to parallel Kara and Lynari, but Lynari’s backstory is so confusing, rushed, and poorly explained that it’s like: okay, they’re both...angry? And the moon jerks hate them? ...uh. Okay.

(I’m gonna bring back my ‘why is this set on the moon, even’ question so that my ‘poor use of space’ header becomes a better joke.) 

PART V - I'M HOLDING OUT FOR A HERO...B/C THERE SURE AIN’T ONE HERE: I’ve already mentioned that Krypto was apparently Kara’s conscience so when Lynari’s aunt arrives to...kill them? (again, everything about Lynari’s backstory is rushed and poorly explained) Kara gets real mad and basically pulls a Gothel: ‘You want me to be the bad guy? Fine! Now I’m the bad guy.’ But thank goodness Lynari is there to tell Kara no! Don’t murder the giant aunt eel! Lynari then steals Kara’s powers and gives up the swamp jewel that’s been hidden inside their body and now their aunt is less murder-y!

WOW. Couldn’t even give the big damn hero moment to Kara in her own book, huh?

So the day is saved. It takes Kara a while to regain her powers, and it’s only then, when she’s no longer ‘above’ the moon jerks, that they’re like, ‘oh, we like her!’ There is a bit of narration about how that attitude is awful. But that narration is provided by Lynari. See, the inner monologue is no longer Kara’s thoughts, but rather it has switched to Lynari’s point of view. They’re telling us this story. And do you know why?

PART VI - WHY THIS COMIC *SUCKS*: KARA DIES. SHE’S THE FRIGGIN’ ‘SECOND GRAVE’ OF THE TITULAR ‘TWO GRAVES’

Fudge this comic to heck.

See, Kara dies on the moon, presumably of old age. She’s buried next to Krypto. And this random character who we’re suddenly supposed to care about tells us her story. Not Clark. Not the Danvers. Not Brainy. Not even one of the supporting cast members from her solo title. No one from Kara’s life is mentioned at all, save for Jon and Clark, and they’re pretty much relegated to flashbacks of Kara punching them. 

PART VII - TIME TO COMPARE DEATHS, I GUESS: First and foremost can I just say that I hate that’s a sentence that I’m typing about Kara in the year of our lord, 2021. But okay: Kara’s big famous death in Crisis stopped the entire DC universe cold. Everyone paused in the middle of the destruction of the multiverse to mourn her loss and honor her (GENUINELY HEROIC) sacrifice. Clark and Barbara--two established characters with a strong connection/relationship to Kara--offered lovely eulogies. 

This one: Kara gets to die of old age in obscurity after a lifetime of striving to be recognized and only achieving it by de-powering and serving a population of jerks. 

Not the warm and fuzzy ending you think it is!

(Meanwhile, Clark lives for millennia and spawns an entire dynasty of Els, all of ‘em out there, protecting the cosmos. I was looking forward to House of El in the hopes of maybe seeing some Kara stuff but NOPE. Thanks to Superwoman, we’re probably not gonna see any future Kara stuff beyond this! G R E A T)

And like, the argument could be made that this ending makes Kara happy. This is the life she chooses! She wants to be alone and garden on the moon! Except, we get zero insight from Kara regarding the remainder of her life. We only have Lynari’s narration and some montage shots...nearly all of which focus on other characters. But honestly, even if we did get Kara’s side of things, I doubt it would shed much light on her feelings, bEEECAUSE...

PART VIII - SUPER BLAND: This Kara really has no personality outside of ‘detached and vaguely bitter.’ I like Sauvage, I think she’s an incredibly talented artist, but here, Kara is stiff and her expression often reads as aloof. She’s very pretty, but it comes at the expense of being expressive. (And I know Sauvage can do expressive stuff...because Lyanari gets to be expressive.) Like...I love that shojo manga vibe but this is a Kara devoid of spark and warmth. 

...Like...Melissa Benoist’s portrayal of Kara is right there... 

I’ve already sort of touched on this but her inner monologue doesn’t have much personality either. She’s just parroting the same, ‘I need to do as Krypto taught me!’ nonsense for both issues. Until, of course, we shift to Lynari’s narration, and lose Kara’s thread entirely. 

PART IX - LET’S WRAP THIS UP: This book frustrates me to no end because it had a lot of stuff going for it. It’s got a female writer and artist--still a rarity for the Supergirl book--it’s a limited series mostly free of continuity and character baggage, and it’s not tied down to the grimdark cyberpunk stuff happening in the Gotham books. YOU COULD’VE DONE ANYTHING. And, once again, DC goes with a pitch that’s: Kara is angry, Kara resents Clark...and Kara dies.

It’s also happening...right as Kara has no dedicated ongoing title, the movie’s been shelved, the TV show is entering its sixth and final season, and all promotion has shifted to new CW and HBO shows. 

*screams into the void* 

MAAAAAAN I hate this book. I hate that it retroactively makes me hate the Andreyko run a little bit--a run that I took to be about a traumatized young woman forced to confront her grief, and who leans on a beloved animal companion for comfort. Here, Krypto is L I T E R A L L Y the reason Kara’s not constantly frying folks with her heat vision. 

I hate that this book has made me use the word ‘literally’ so much in this rant.

I hate that this could possibly be more in continuity than Millennium.

Remember Millennium? Where Kara was in like...five pages? And she was warm, and kind, and promised to help Rose because it was the right thing to do, and oh yes, WAS PRESIDENT OF EARTH?!??! AND A CLASSY OLD LADY!?!?!?!?! WHO WAS STILL ALIVE AND KICKIN’ IN THE FAR FLUNG FUTURE!?!?!?!?!

I hate that I’m using my lunch hour to rant about how much I hate this comic.  

I hate that DC editorial seems hell-bent on erasing the interesting aspects of Kara’s character to sand her down to ‘the angry one’ or ‘Batman 2.0′

PART X - LET’S END ON SOME (?) POSITIVES: Don’t read this book! Don’t do it! Don’t waste your time and money!

Instead, check out ANYTHING ELSE. If you want mom!Kara, read Tom Taylor’s ‘Last Daughters of Krypton’ in the DC Nuclear Winter special. If you want heroic oldlady!Kara, read Millennium. Honestly? Pick up anything by Bendis that has Supergirl in it. It is miles away better than this. You want angry Kara working through her grief? Andreyko, Red Lantern, even Infected. ANYTHING BUT THIS. HECK, grab Superman of Metropolis instead! That has bad Kara characterization but at least she doesn’t end up dead. 

Anyways. This comic is bad. I wish it wasn’t! And this is now the SECOND TIME IN A ROW that Kara’s book ends on a terrible note before the character disappears from monthly comics for an unknown period of time.  

*screams into the void again*

#SG post #future state #future state superwoman #comic rant #and oh it is a RANT

[f4liveblogarchives]

Fantastic Four Vol 1 #129

Fri Jul 26 2019 [06:34 PM] Wack'd: The Four are landing the Fantasticar when Reed and Ben both fall ill. Sue remarks that she had to finish landing procedures, and Ben makes a woman driver joke. Classy. [06:35 PM] Wack'd: This is hot off the heels of their previous adventure so it's probably fatigue from getting their asses kicked. Why it doesn't effect Sue and Johnny I have no idea [06:38 PM] Wack'd: Meanwhile Johnny's decided that he's going to move in with Crystal. He hasn't, like, talked to her about it or anything? And also a few issues ago he called not doing that the mature thing to do. So I'm not sure where this is coming from. [06:38 PM] Wack'd: I'm starting to think that writing Fantastic Four transmits memory issues [06:39 PM] Wack'd: Or maybe writing a comic book while also being the editor in chief of the company isn't such a hot idea [06:39 PM] Wack'd: Archie Goodwin never had this problem! [06:41 PM] Wack'd: So Johnny, probably remembering that the last few times he tried to fly via firepower to find Crystal it kind of wiped him out, steals a jet instead. Reed and Ben try to stop him but Sue handily clears a path by making Ben's hands invisible [06:42 PM] Wack'd: YES YES YES YES YES YES

[06:42 PM] Wack'd: (Also: Central Asia! You know, all of it!) [06:43 PM] Bocaj: The Entirety of Central Asia [06:43 PM] Bocaj: God marvel just make up countries we know you like to do it [06:44 PM] Wack'd: What's especially weird is that Inhuman City does have a canonical in-universe location! It's in the Himalayas! [06:44 PM] Wack'd: Unfortunately, in the time since Johnny was last here, Maximus took over. AGAIN. [06:45 PM] Bocaj: ffs [06:45 PM] maxwellelvis: Are we sure this isn't the same conquest he just nope'd out of last time? [06:45 PM] Wack'd: We are! [06:45 PM] maxwellelvis: That's twice in one year. [06:45 PM] Wack'd: A narration caption informs us that Maximus got overthrown in another comic [06:46 PM] maxwellelvis: What kind of bodyguards is Black Bolt hiring because they clearly need replacing [06:46 PM] Bocaj: Its nepotism [06:46 PM] Bocaj: its all cousins and stuff [06:46 PM] Bocaj: Maybe the guy called Gorgon who is actually a satyr isn't the best for the job [06:46 PM] Bocaj: We'll never know because Blackagar refuses to interview anyone else or at all [06:46 PM] Umbramatic: rip [06:47 PM] Wack'd: Johnny, in a rare display of self control, concludes that kicking ass and taking names won't get him inside the dome Maximus has erected [06:47 PM] Wack'd: And lets himself get captured [06:49 PM] Wack'd: Johnny, considering the shit you pulled the second-to-last time you were here, I feel like the answer to that question is kind of obvious?

[06:50 PM] Wack'd: Meanwhile, in the Baxter Building, Agatha Harkness offers her resignation, as only she can--with a big giant floating head message [06:51 PM] Wack'd: Bocaj, does 1973 sound about right for her tutelage of Wanda? [06:54 PM] Bocaj: 74 I think [06:54 PM] Wack'd: Huh [06:54 PM] Wack'd: Wonder what she's getting up to in 1973 that he has to quit [06:54 PM] Bocaj: Is Franklin in a coma? [06:54 PM] Wack'd: Uh [06:54 PM] Wack'd: Not to my knowledge [06:55 PM] Bocaj: People lobotomize their super genius babies so often in comics I’m not sure if this happened to Franklin or to another super genius baby [06:55 PM] Wack'd: I'd ask Agatha about this herself, but

[06:55 PM] Bocaj: I know Superman did it to his super genius baby [06:55 PM] Bocaj: Because he was jealous [06:55 PM] Wack'd: Yeesh [06:55 PM] Bocaj: Silver age Superman could be very petty [06:56 PM] maxwellelvis: Oh, SILVER age [06:56 PM] Bocaj: Along with all the mind fucking he does to his friends constantly [06:56 PM] maxwellelvis: so that wasn't an intentional homage to the Reign of the Superman story then [06:56 PM] Wack'd: Sue continues to delight

[06:57 PM] Wack'd: Ben has perhaps an outsized confidence in Reed's good intentions but they have been best friends for like two decades, so [06:57 PM] Bocaj: Sue has learned Valkyrie’s most important lesson [06:57 PM] Wack'd: Men ain't shit? [06:57 PM] Bocaj: Men ain’t shit [06:58 PM] maxwellelvis: "Men." "BOOOOOO!" [06:58 PM] Bocaj: I think she also made allusion to masturbation [06:59 PM] Bocaj: She was talking to teenagers. So she was also giving them alcohol [06:59 PM] Wack'd: Anyway Ben decides to go see Alicia but is ambushed by--well, I mean, guess [06:59 PM] Bocaj: Ninjas [06:59 PM] maxwellelvis: What a good influence that Val is [06:59 PM] maxwellelvis: Moloids [06:59 PM] Bocaj: Ninja moloids [06:59 PM] Wack'd:

[06:59 PM] maxwellelvis: Oh right [06:59 PM] Bocaj: How was I to guess that [07:00 PM] maxwellelvis: I forgot he was also an FF villain [07:00 PM] Wack'd: C'mon guys it explicitly said "Frightful Four" at the end of last issue [07:00 PM] Bocaj: Oh [07:00 PM] maxwellelvis: I forgot Sandman was part of the Frightful Four [07:00 PM] Wack'd: Also yaaaaaaay Sandman ditched that awful costume Kirby gave him [07:00 PM] maxwellelvis: I think this is the first time he's done this in his normal duds [07:00 PM] Bocaj: His costume was bad so I’m glad he’s back to his silly civvies [07:00 PM] maxwellelvis: what happened to his cornrows? [07:00 PM] maxwellelvis: Or whatever you'd call that weird Osborn hair? [07:01 PM] Wack'd: Those didn't last long--they're done by the time he got his "zoot suit" [07:01 PM] maxwellelvis: Probably because Kirby couldn't draw them. [07:02 PM] Wack'd:

[07:02 PM] Bocaj: The weird orsborn hair had John Byrne decide that sandman was Norman’s cousin [07:03 PM] Bocaj: In Spider Man chapter 1 [07:03 PM] Wack'd: Wingless Wizard and Trapster are also here [07:03 PM] Bocaj: Paste Pot Pete [07:03 PM] Wack'd: But fortunately Medusa is on hair to even the odds a little [07:04 PM] Wack'd: Two on three. Hardly a fair fight [07:04 PM] Bocaj: Frightful ... three? [07:04 PM] Wack'd: I assume there's a fourth to be introduced [07:04 PM] maxwellelvis: You'd think the others in the Frightful Four wouldn't have a problem taking on Medusa [07:04 PM] maxwellelvis: They fought alongside her, they should know how she fights. [07:04 PM] Wack'd: And also a fifth because the caption said "plus one" last issue [07:04 PM] Wack'd: max: Counterpoint: they're all dinks [07:04 PM] maxwellelvis: True [07:06 PM] Bocaj: Rate them in terms of dink [07:06 PM] Wack'd: From least to most dink: Sandman, Wizard, Pete [07:06 PM] Wack'd: ...can someone explain this joke to me

[07:06 PM] maxwellelvis: Paste Pot Pete being so lame that even Roy doesn't feel like reminding the readers of his appearances, I assume. [07:06 PM] Wack'd: Ahhhh [07:07 PM] Bocaj: He’s a good kind of lame [07:07 PM] Bocaj: Plus he’s smarter than baron Zemo [07:07 PM] Bocaj: He actually made a universal solvent so he wouldn’t say glue a ski mask to his face for twenty years [07:08 PM] Wack'd: AND HERE SHE IS, THE FOURTH OF YOUR FRIGHTFUL FOUR--THE ONE--THE ONLY--

[07:09 PM] Bocaj: Oh shit it’s Thundra [07:09 PM] maxwellelvis: Oh shit whaddup [07:09 PM] maxwellelvis: Looking at her now, Thundra almost seems like a playful rib on Wonder Woman. [07:09 PM] Bocaj: Ben don’t be sexist, give her a punch [07:09 PM] maxwellelvis: Don't know what that never occurred to me before. [07:10 PM] Wack'd: Cute

[07:10 PM] Bocaj: Right in the baby blues [07:10 PM] maxwellelvis: Only instead of fighting for truth or love or whatever, Thundra just loves to fight, period. [07:11 PM] Bocaj: Respect [07:11 PM] Wack'd: So Thundra makes short work of Ben, and Medusa, tossing her up into the air, but Ben creates a bed of dirt to toss up and catch her in midair which is wonderful nonsense [07:12 PM] Wack'd:

[07:12 PM] Wack'd: Most people are, Medusa! [07:13 PM] maxwellelvis: Wrestling Chants - Holy Shit [07:13 PM] Wack'd: So Thundra joined up because she wants Ben. For reasons. [07:13 PM] Wack'd: And so the second Ben and Medusa are laid out, infighting starts over who gets dibs on who [07:14 PM] Wack'd: But fortunately Wizard comes to his senses

[07:14 PM] Wack'd: And an ominous cliffhanger arrives that I'm sure will prove to be a lie in no way whatsoever

#1972 #Roy Thomas #John Buscema #The Main Book

[theultimatetamer]

Interview with Ilaria Catalani

Monster Allergy Week, Day 7

Free-for-all

And since I had no clue what to do for this day I thought: “Why not an interview?”. So here we are!

For the last day of the Monster Allergy Fandom Week you are going to have two very special and exclusive interviews. The first one could not be with any other than the one and only Ilaria Catalani, to whom I will never be thankful enough for this!

Huge thanks to @shikadora-momo as well for helping me out. This would have never been possible without her.

If you want to read the original interview in Italian, click here.

If you want to read the interview in English, keep reading.

1. You have recently become one of the idols of this fanbase, but some people might still not know who you are exactly. So, who is Ilaria Catalani?

First of all, hello everybody! It’s a pleasure for me to answer these questions. Thank you for allowing me to be here!

I am very surprised to know I have become an “idol” for you guys, ha ha ha! It was unexpected, really!

I’d say it’s time for me to introduce myself properly, then!

I’m a girl born on the seaside 28 years ago, in a city nearby the capital of Italy. I have a crazy passion for cartoon openings, Japanese curry and for mystery and paranormal stories!

I have been drawing basically since always and I had always wished to work as a comic artist… that’s why my studies have always aimed at the artistic field! In fact, now I’m working mostly as a comic designer, but I happen to work as an illustrator or freelancer for private commissions as well!

2. In what other projects can we find your name, be it as an author or as a designer?

As I’ve said before I’m a comic artist / illustrator / freelancer. I have also worked as an inker for the Italian publishing house Edizioni Dentiblù, for their series Zannablù, and always with them I published my first original comic book: Hadez (written by me and Silvia Tidei).

At the moment I’m working on the new issue of Monster Allergy, «The valley of bombos», and also as a designer for the Regal Academy comics (Rainbow).

So for now I’d say these are the main projects in which you can find my name and last name! I hope the list will become longer with time! Ha ha!

3. When did you realize that you wanted to turn your passion into a job and work as an illustrator? How did you get where you are today?

As a kid I absolutely loved anime, I grew up with Kaibutsu-kun, Arale, Dash Kappei, Dragon Ball and Sailor Moon… not to mention all the Disney movies and series that marked my childhood. At first I didn’t understand why I felt so sad at the end of every episode, but with time I realized that melancholy came from the fact that I wanted to know more, see more and turn those stories inside out… So I decided that I, too, wanted to tell a story that would make others feel the same way I felt. At the beginning I thought my future would have been that of a “mere” designer… but then manga arrived in my room and everything started. While my classmates were focused on completely different things, I couldn’t get away from that world I created so I decided to turn this passion of mine into my job, my main path. I studied at the Institute of Art and then I attented comic school in Rome. This way I began my way, which is still evolving!

4. Do you have any advice for those who want to pursue the same career as you?

Everytime I’m asked this question I can only come up with the most trivial answer ever: have fun.

After all, I’m aware there are not many other advices to give, really… it’s a very personal path, a difficult journey that’s not for everybody but if you’re strong and tough enough you can make it. You need to have tons of passion and willpower… these are two essential traits, in my opinion.

5. How did you end up getting involved in this project? Did you know Monster Allergy from before?

Actually, I have a very funny anecdote regarding my first encounter with Monster Allergy.

When I was little I made the same mistake as many others of my generation that grew up surrounded by manga and I only allowed comics signed by Japanese artists on my bookshelf. One day, watching an advert about the first release of Monster Allergy I felt very excited. I noticed the comic had many traits similar to my beloved Japenese comic books but it was made in Italy so, all happy, I rushed to buy the comic, only to find out it was labeled under Disney, so I pinned it in my mind as something that could never be my thing … hahahah I’m a dork!

Truth be told, at the time I couldn’t admit I liked the volume, to this day I believe that, on a graphic level, it’s one of the best comics for young audience I have ever seen… Unfortunately, I never got any deeper into the series aside from the first volume and some random issues that helped me to know more about almost all the characters. But I believe that, at this point, I’m obliged to recover the whole series! Right?

About my involment; I was offered to do it and I couldn’t have been any happier since I have wanted to work with the authors of the series for a long time. That’s it! :D

6. How has it been working with Walter Baiamonte? Did you decide it or was it the publishing house?

This is the very first project, aside from little works, that I do with Walter… Even if I know him very well in many other aspects since we share our daily life. However I knew Walter since before being workmates and I have always thought he is a great comic artist / designer / colorist… I was often “jealous” of his natural talent for crazy and rad things! It makes me realize that I still have a lot to learn and reminds me of how lazy I am! Ahhh!

The decision to have him as the colorist for this issue of Monster Allergy was made by the authors of the series but I can only thank them for it, they made it all even more fun for me than it was already!

7. How do you feel about working on Monster Allergy in general?  What do you think was the biggest challenge or setback that you had to face while designing the new issue?

I feel… euphoric and scared in equal measure, actually!

Euphoric because, in fact, I’m a huge fan of stories for the young audience (Hadez belongs to that genre, even if it’s not an adventurous type of story like Monster Allergy)… Scared because this is a HUGE series with lots of fans and affectionate people and I have the hard task to make them all happy with my drawings and narration!

There haven’t been any huge obstacles really. At first it was difficult to get in gear with this comic because, as I said before, I had the sudden weight and responsibility to do a great job… However you have to know that I’m doing my best!

8. Which character have you enjoyed drawing the most and why? And the least?

There’s no character I liked the least to draw, they’re all very different so none of them was boring, on the contrary! Every character gave me a spark to create different mimics and give them an appropriate behavior according to their personalities!

Actually, the characters I loved drawing the most were two: Timothy and the new character, the kid… whom I can’t reveal a thing about, not even the name :P He he he, I’m evil!

Anyway Timothy is a Sphynx and I think Sphynx are beautiful cats. Moreover, he always looks grumpy and serious… It’s so much fun drawing his tiny spiky forms…! About the other character, well, professional quirk… I have a soft spot for very young characters, they’re always extremely fun to draw and animate in the panels!

9. Risky question: is it true that we are going to find some characters of Hadez hidden in the panels?

This is when I need to put on a mask and sunglasses to avoid being recognized and play dumb *cough* *cough*.

Anyway yes, I love easter eggs and I like to include characters of mine or from my friends (sometimes even sneaking my friends in directly) in the pages of projects I’m working on, if I have the chance to… Sometimes I do it simply because it’s fun… other times because I have no idea what the background characters look like, so I ease my job drawing something I already know!

10. If you were given the offer to work on any of the upcoming chapters would you take it?

If I received an offer like that I would absolutely accept. I felt very comfortable working on this story and I think that in many ways it made me grew even more as designer… So, even though I doubt it’ll happen, I’d say yes!

11. To finish with, do you have any message for the fans that are going to read this?

I have never been a faithful follower of your favorite series but, in my own way, I loved it while drawing it and this gave me a boost to be curious and learn more about it… So, I truly hope that the new chapter will be of your liking as much as it has been for me. It’s been wonderfully fun and I hope I have been able to do justice to your beloved characters!

Thank you very much for this interview! <3

#monster allergy #monster allergy week #maweek17 #maweek2017 #day 7 #interview #ilaria catalani

[tessatechaitea]

Black Condor #2

The Sky Pirate is definitely an incel.

I don't want to shit on incels because people who can't get laid aren't the only jerks who turn into monsters when they can't get their way. I also don't want to make it seem like not getting laid is the worst thing that can happen to a person but have you ever not gotten laid when you really, really wanted to fuck? It's the worst! Now think about not being able to get laid for thirty to forty years. Do you think you're going to give one shit about climate change?! Of course not! That's why Sky Pirate is carbon emitting all over the fucking place on the cover! Sky Pirate doesn't need Black Condor to punch him in the face; he needs him to suck his balls. On the other hand, getting laid isn't that great, I bet.

I don't know why the guy isn't coming in his pants too.

Back in 1992, we didn't have incels. We just had guys who understood they were never going to get laid so they memorized all the stats of Fiend Folio monsters no Dungeon Master would ever use, like the achaierai or the umpleby or the tween or the snyad or the twill or the tabaxi or the qullan or the mantari or the gryph. Those are actual monsters but I probably could have just made up a bunch of nonsense words and nobody would have fucking noticed. Fiend Folio had a lot of shitty monsters. You know who wouldn't know that? Somebody who was getting laid in 1992! Something else somebody getting laid in 1992 wouldn't understand? Jerking off to the caryatid column!

I had to steal this image from the Internet because I've packed away all of my D&D manuals.

We really need legalized prostitution in this country. Also, we need to remove any negative stigma for going to a prostitute. Also we need male prostitutes that are good at sex so that women don't have to hook up with random guys who are probably terrible at sex when they want to bust whatever the female version of nuts are. Inside nuts? It's got to be tough being an incel in that even if you think you might finally get the chance to get laid, you know you're going to be awful at it and probably ruin a second chance of getting laid. Because who wants to fuck a guy whose underwear looks like the aftermath of a visit from your friendly neighborhood Spider-man when you go to pull his dick out? True story (I have to preface this story that way so that people actually think it's true even though they should realize I'm an unreliable narrator): when I finally met a woman who wanted desperately to fuck me, I obviously wasn't going to be any good at sex. I had learned to jerk off quickly in the quiet moments nobody was in the house (often to the scene in Return of the Living Dead (on VHS tape) when the punk girl dances naked on the crypt). So when this lovely and accommodating woman pulled my cock out and began kissing and sucking it, I wanted to explode immediately. But I knew I couldn't do that! I had to hold out! So I held out for like ten or fifteen seconds and, in my head, I thought, "That's good enough, right?!" Then I blew my load in her face and she was all, "Whoa. Um. Hey. What the fuck?" Actually, she wanted to fuck me so badly that she didn't care that I was almost certainly going to prematurely ejaculate every time we fucked until I finally decided I wanted to spend more time replaying Ultima IV than fucking poorly. Our sex actually did get better over time (and by "our," I obviously mean "my") but that was only because I'd come in her almost immediately and then, through pure will force rivaling that of Hal Jordan himself, I would just get hard again while trying not to let my flaccid member slip out of her. Luckily she could orgasm through penetration only because just imagine how bad I was at oral sex too! Um, that wasn't really a true story! I just have a great imagination! But then, you knew that because of all the times I mentioned being a virgin. Which was totally a lie too! I've been laid lots! And I was always great at it. Black Condor's grandfather can't get over his grandson not wanting to be a part of his old man secret society so he's sending an army of "shock troopers" out to capture him.

Has nobody told him about airplanes?

I can't stop staring at the look of pure joy on the woman's face in the panel where Black Condor is rescuing the campers. I'm actually fucking jealous of a fictional character in a drawing because how the fuck does she get to be so fucking happy?! Nearly the entire first half of this issue is dedicated to the origin of The Sky Pirate. My guess that he's an incel wasn't too far off the mark. He was a nerdy college kid working in hypersonic flight who desperately wanted to be part of the free love movement. He was eventually let in on the condition that he do all the work and earn them all the money, like how Brian was only allowed to be part of The Breakfast Club if he wrote everybody else's essays while they all hooked up. In the end, he made them all rich while he was a fugitive from the government. They did the thing all of the fucking asshole Boomers did: they gave up their ideals and convictions for wealth beyond measure at the expense of everybody else. So, twenty years later, he's returned to destroy them.

So this guy's a hero! Why is Black Condor trying to stop him on the cover?!

Black Condor is a good guy so I bet he winds up teaming up with Sky Pirate after the initial Marvel misunderstanding. I'm almost positive he does because I purchased the third issue and there's no way I would have kept reading this series if my president The Sky Pirate was beaten and tossed in jail. Even as a randy twenty-one year old spending nearly every night of the week pretending I was a grey elf named Paladine Greystoke, I was completely sympathetic to the underdogs of our fucked up capitalist society. Sky Pirate plans on stealing as much money from The Merry Men (what the asshole Boomers called themselves because they're so unimaginative they had to steal Kesey's groups' name) as he can. But to do so, he needs to use his hypersonic weapons. Black Condor's new senses are so powerful that every time Sky Pirate uses one of his gadgets, Black Condor is overwhelmed by pain. That must be why he needs to beat the shit out of Sky Pirate. It's less about justice and more about getting him to shut the fuck up. I get it! I once had a neighbor who hung up industrial sized wind chimes outside my bedroom window. And every time I snuck over to take them down, the assholes would just put them back up. They're lucky I didn't go Black Condor all over their asses and swoop in with a flurry of uppercuts! Instead I just cut out off the clapper and made the chimes impotent. Black Condor shows up and asks Sky Pirate what he's doing. Sky Pirate is all, "Fuck you. I don't have to answer to you, you nipple exposing weirdo!" And then he flies off. But Black Condor won't let it drop, albeit reluctantly! He flies after him because he's a nosy jerk. Can't he just let it drop? The noise only happened the one time. I get how terrible noises can be; I'm pretty sensitive to a lot of sounds myself (fuck every guy with an acoustic guitar, by the way). But maybe wait to see if it happens again before really confronting this guy. Also, I'm sure he has a reason for blowing a hole in a building! He told Black Condor it was personal business and it's not like Black Condor has been deputized by anybody except maybe Park Ranger Ned. I'm totally on Sky Pirate's side right now! Judging by the cover of Issue #3, Sky Pirate is going to blast Black Condor with more hypersonics and Black Condor is going to plunge into the river in a scary cliffhanger where the reader thinks Black Condor may have drowned.

Okay, I'm torn. I like Sky Pirates revenge on capitalistic Boomer shitheads. But I also empathize with Black Conder's sensitivity to noise!

Since this issue is definitely going to end how I predicted since, as I said, I'm looking at the cover of Issue #3 right now where Black Condor is emerging from the river, I bet Issue #3 sees Sky Pirate and Black Condor quickly finding common ground and working together to defeat the Merry Men. Also, I hope Sky Pirate becomes an occasional Black Condor teammate. Maybe he'll take up residence with Ned and Eileen in the Pine Barrens! And then the issue ends with Black Condor plummeting into the river. But it also ends with possibly my favorite "Next Issue Blurb" of all time!

No wonder I bought issue #3! I had to see if the sun imploded! Spoiler alert: it didn't.

Black Condor #2 Rating: A-! Holy shit! A comic book with a better than average passing grade! I must really be feeling charitable seeing as how it's my 48th birthday. Yes, that's right, assholes. I'm fucking old! But I'm still cool, right? And totally sexually active, like a mythic beast! Oh, before I go, here's the back cover because, yeesh. Put on some make-up, dudes.

I loved my Grandmother with all my heart. She was possibly the most perfect human being to ever walk this planet. She was Catholic but I'm fairly certain she practiced birth control based on the differences in age of her two (only two!) children. Her wedding picture was of her in a beautiful non-wedding dress and my grandfather in a suit standing on some spiral steps at the courthouse (not a church! She also had a church wedding photograph but mostly due to the pressure of social politics and religion (I like to believe, anyway!)). She distanced herself from the Catholic church because of the way church members treated and talked terribly about Jewish people. She was the greatest. But the only time she ever disappointed me was when Gene Simmons was on Donahue and she said, "My, that's a handsome man!"

#Black Condor #Brian Augustyn #Rags Morales #DC #DC Comics #Sky Pirate