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the-reactionist · 5 years

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my ‘bad blood’

there is a fascinating iterview with Carl jung where he sepaks about Hitler; upon readign it i understood some thigns about myself; [link]

i look like hitler, so does my grandmother on the father’s side, and her son - my biological ‘dad’, thus we must have a connection;

Jung explained soemthign imprtant about adolf hitler - he was a witchdoctod, from the african tradition of witchcraft; that is a very powerful voodo traditiona dn i thik goes back to ancient egypt times, too; but it’s dark still for me and i don’t realize the full thing for now; the fact is that its awitchcraft absed on fear,a nd it is worse even than the black witchcraft in europe during the middle ages -

now that is where my mother’s bloodline is - i asoociate her fatehr with the nrose diety ragnar, and with european witches, but also with the people who fought witches by torturing them and buring them, and they themselves came from a bckground of religious self-torture - they were fanatics; jut like the diety ragnar is;

hitler was not just tht though; actual practical amgic , i read in one article somewhere, came with the crusaders from the lands of the middle east - all the alternative teachings that were abundant there i amny sects and cryptic practises, some fo which we now can call demonic; they were ased on fear; dark magic, inherently;

the witchdoctors that hitler’s brainw as connected with came from taht dark tradition, in africa; and my parents on the side of my ‘father’ are turkish indescent and they have taht strong persian /arabic vibe; but in a not always good sense, unfortunately; they fer lack and thus they become selfisha nd brutal, too materialistic and demanding of abundance in abusive ways, even gross, pervrted sexually ways - my grandmother was a pedophile and she sued to touch me and my sister as small girls and we developed insane brainfuck ebcause fo that;

there is mroe to it, unfortunately but it’s hard to formulate for now;

so jung spoke of hitler as a doll, a voodoo object; he was not a sensible epros, but possessed, especially in the end; my father strikingly resembles hi m and it is very undertsandible why my mother liked himbecause she carries a desire for vengance and love for nazi order in ehrself; she loves germanya nd how everything is organzied disciplined and strict there; which for me is torture and isanity when it comes to my subconsious; but that might e just my turkish descent’s flaw; i am gonna explore that i n later posts; i amcertain it must be this;

because actually germanic structure of society and manners of living are related directly to the norse gods system, which ie xplored too at one point; and so do amy other peopel; so ti is a virtuous and humanistic system, not merely brutal and agry;

my take on it comes from MY INNEE SHADOW which is hatred of lack fo abundance3; i love gold flowing from my shower when i am showering, if i have to put it in words; in truth i feel msierable fi im nto in the warmth of the desert and eating freshly picked fruit by the peopel who work for me - my bloodline is related to the pharaohs, and to cleopatra... so its peopel fo high status and powerful positions in society; nothing to match with my other familiar’s village way fo life and the cozyness of the woods, the cbin, the fireplace, the woolen clothes and the home; we are leaders and rulers and love glory; just love it; we are capable fo hanling muc stress and we are actually immortal; so that shadow aint taht abd either;

but black magic ia frica sprung in places where peopel lived in mysery so there sia lto fo aggression there to this day, as you very well know - i am not well educated on tribal peopela nd their wys of though; i am always surrounded by civillized people, and civilized criminala ctivity - yakuza, gangs, drug lords, dictators, spies, agents, police and military; but never brutality of the lower vibrational level - people whoa re animalistic and they dont realize their diviity within;

i dont judge that, i am clarifying wher is atnd in the world we are living in; to me such peopel are scary ebcause they refuse the light of God;

i love my cleopatra roots, they ar really wise and loving, playful and lusty; tjhis was her word up there; bless her heart! she was a beutiful woman;

s for the egyptin pharaohs, they are said to have been seeded by the starpeopel themselves, the gods, tahts why they carried divinity in the dna of normal humansa nd spread it across the centuries of their rule, mating with many and ruliung in the lands of the original human beings - africa; they were very feared and hated, especially by those who woudl later on become dark wizards in africa, dark voodoo practitioners and the brain-masters behind the puppet hitler; they hate humanity in many levels, tehy hate civillied humanity anmd their power is brute force; amny of todays africna dictators have that encoding in them; i am writing this to spread awareness on the subject ebcause my cleopatra self is still a politican and i cant escape my need for being powerful player that helps govern the outcomes of the plitical stategies and happenings that amke up our near futures; i decide to do that in a soft manner, nto as a politician, but s an inspirational perso, in art, in real-life stories i share and have suffered slongside many of te others slaves of today’s society and the capitallistic structure that is not functioning for the well being fo the people but fuelling fearful and greedy dictators worldwide, insetad of terating the wounds of the past, and present, and takign care fort the future of the nature and environment of this earth; it could have been the other way around thus i am using my psychic and goddly abilities to brainfuck the ill-minded leaders and to insipre ordinary folk to be more proslerous, joyous and bold in their ways of viewing and experiencing life and reality;

my leadership is warm and heartful; i am cleoptra

*i even look like leonor varela and we share the same name lol

[idk if tahtw as achanneling right now but i hve ahd those before too, so dont take the words eprosnally, but like a energy that i amc hannelling but also repect and associate with myself somehow, wich i as the way for me to expand - taking in stuff and finding comparisons between me and them or if i revere somebody ro soemthuing - go out of my ways to enact their ways and learn new startegies fo thinking about life and operating in it - as happened with the boy i am loving from 5 years now ; i wanted to copy every bit of him and paste it into my Self and tehe merging oif the two is a compelx and very eautiful rpocess full of itegration, sorrow and painfuless;

but cleopatra herself was amazing; she is a ebodiment of the goddess ISIS, occording to one article - JESUS; thats a very ineterstign tale as well:

she was a devotee to the goddess isis and the last pharaoh of egypt and the turns of events in the world lead her to reincarnate in the form of Jesus; her last lover - Mark nathony was like a small boy and although the romance was passionate, she was liek a mother to him too; there the mary/jesus/mary magdalene separation was created, into new symbols that comprise the same characters and had been played out amongst humans ever since that era - the mary/jesus/mary magdalene archetypes are mcuh more ‘common’, ordinary - a lot more people, poor people, not pharaohs and clergy, or goddesses/gids, can find their selves in those archetypes, and thus grow their hearts strong and loving for their divvinity, embracing at the smae tiemtheir humanity;

it is interestign now to delve into the aspects of isis/cleopatra/mark anthony and gender roles, because those are also improtant aspects of the separation the christian order; cleopatra is a god - nor male, neither female; but jeus has gender preferences; so he is not god, but a human;

christ consciousness is a mass consciousness ascencion project; aimed at elevating the entire humanity to God; and cleopatra /isi is the source of it; but keep ti a secret ;)

i’ll stop here for now

#cleopatra #akr #magic #africa #ages #ragnar #witches #europe #egypt #ancient #mark #anthony #jesus #christ #consciousness #mass #isis #divine #feminine

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actually-impostor · 7 years

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Heroes and Anti-Heroes (3)

Saturday update, and I’m also here to tell that I’m posting this one in AO3 too

people tagged: @deafinatelyfangirling, @mira-jadeamethyst, @fearinghope (Im not sure they wish to be tagged again, but let me know if you want to get out of the tag list)

Warnings for this chapter: None really, some cursing

Previous Chapter, AO3 Link

-0-0-0- Chapter 2: Control -0-0-0-

The years went by fast, faster than any of them could have predict they would, and when both friends last expected it, it was already time to apply for high school.

Both had their eyes set on Atlas, one of the best superhero academies in the USA. It was said that to apply there you had to be the best in not only your classes but also in your whole school, even knowing that fact, Enhos and Roman didn’t let it discourage them. They had faith in their abilities and in the other.

“Come on Roman, is just history!”

“Why would I even need history? I’m going to be a super hero after all”

“Those who don’t know the past are bound to repeat it”

Roman looked at his friend confused and Enhos shrugged embarrassedly, trying to hide his face with the hood of Shadow

“I-It’s what Papa always says!”

“Eh, I guess he’s right” Roman waved his hand around and turned to his friend, smirking “Anyway, any idea what your hero name is going to be?”

“Isn’t it a little too soon to be thinking of it?”

“No!” Roman eyes where shinning, and Enhos could swear there was fire surrounding his friend “I’ve had my hero name since I was ten! I’ll be known as Regal, the most amazing knight in the history of heroes”

“And then there’s going to be an egocentric kid complaining that they don’t need to know history and you’ll be forgotten”

“Ack, why must you rain on my parade?”

“It’s my job as your friend” Roman groaned and Enhos smiled “But anyway, I think it fits you Young Boss”

“Ugh don’t call me that, that’s how my mom’s security call me”

“I know” Enhos smirked “And it’s hilarious”

“Why am I your friend again?” With that both boys laughed “But, do you really think the name fits me?”

“Yeah, you give off that…” Enhos paused, making some random hand movements “I don’t know, Prince Charming kind of energy”

Roman laughed and put an arm around Enhos shoulders, pressing his friend to his side and making Enhos chuckle with him

“I’m flattered”

“Yeah, yeah. Now get to work Princey, or I’ll be the only one entering Atlas”

“Oh hush, we both are going in”

Enhos smiled, even if Roman was constantly assuring him that both were going to enter Atlas there was still that silver of doubt. Would they really be able to get in? Roman had a lot of troubles in history and math, and Enhos couldn’t understand a word of Physics. Besides that there was also the fighting part of the exam.

Enhos knew Roman would do well in that part; the boy could materialize weapons for Christ sakes, but what about Enhos himself? Would he get kicked out because his Quirk was too dark? Kicked out because his Quirk was too dangerous?

“Hey, I can hear you thinking over here. What’s up?”

“Nothing, I’m just anxious about the entrance exams”

“You’ll do great! I’ve never meet anyone with suck a great control of their Quirk, and you are like wicked smart”

“Wow, careful there pretty boy, one might think you like me”

“Nah” Roman waved his hand, like dissipating the idea “I only tolerate you because your dad makes the best cookies”

Both boys laughed at that, Enhos anxiety being calmed down for the time being

-0-

“Im going to fail”

“You’ll do fine Enhos”

“No, Dad no, you don’t get it. Im going to fail and I’ll bring dishonor to our whole family, and on me, and our cow!” Jeremiah looked at his son with a small smile

“Is he aware he’s quoting Mulan?”

“I don’t think so” Aaron laughed, shaking his head

“Hey kiddo, breath” He ruffled his son hair, no longer having to kneel in front of him to do so “You’ll do amazing, you are smart and have talent. It’s gonna be great”

Enhos breather deeply and tried to center himself. He looked at his dad and nodded, he was as ready as he could ever be to go to the exam.

The trip there was relaxed, Jeremiah had soft music playing in the background and Enhos was distracting himself with his phone. Apparently Roman wasn’t feeling much better

When his dad stopped the car Enhos opened his eyes wide, he could feel the panic clawing at his throat and in his need to feel calmer he had reached out to hold his dad hand

Jeremiah held strongly and smiled “Enhos, my wonderful son”

“D-dad”

“I’m proud of you, and I’ll be proud of you no matter what”

“E-even if I f-fail?”

“Even if you fail. You have defeated the odds, everyone told you that you could only be a villain but here you are! About to take the entrance exam to the best hero school in the US” he smiled, still holding his son hand “Your Papa and I are so proud of you my son, no matter what. Now go there and show everyone that Enhos Farandole is, and always was, a hero”

With that Enhos took a shuddering breath and nodded, he could do this. He had spent more than a month studying, his grades where one of the best in class (with a constant battle for the number one spot against Roman), he had the drive and motivation. He could do this.

As he sat down to take the test he stared at his credential, the number 2089 glaring back at him. He had to fight against other 2088 humans; probably more than that, considering he wasn’t the last one in the list, but could he really earn a place here?

He was playing with his pencil when someone else sat beside him; Enhos stared at the girl with beautiful brown skin and black hair, she looked slightly scared and stressed. He figured he wasn’t looking much better. At Enhos other side sat a boy that, compared to the others sitting around, looked relaxed and composed with the air of someone that already had been picked to enter the school. Enhos stared at him through his bangs in curiosity, and in that second the boy stared back at him.

“A pleasure, my name is Logan”

“A-ah, the name’s Enhos” He shook the offered hand and Logan smiled

“Good luck today Enhos”

“S-same”

When the examiner entered the auditorium everyone was sitting in, he took out some papers and started reading in a bored voice.

“Okay, let’s cut straight to the important stuff” He murmured “As you all know you have an hour to finish each exam. There are 4 written exams, one for every important thing.”

He took a small remote control and turned on a hologram, there was written everything that could be considered important for the examinees

“As you all can see there’s one for everything language related, one for everything math related, the other for the history of the USA, and a special one for the most popular heroes throughout history”

Here the examiner paused to yawn, making a few of the kids in the front row follow his example

“You are also forbidden from using your powers; we have a few people with cancelling Quirks around the room to prevent that from happening. Well, good luck and try not to die”

With that last statement the teacher made the test appear in front of them and a clock started the countdown. Enhos groaned, they had started with math and he was ready to throw his chair at the examiner.

He could hear the panicked murmurs around the room, whispered “what the fuck” around the room, making him chuckle under his breath because same. He looked at the clock and noticed that there was only 20 minutes left, so he concentrated as much as possible. By the corner of his eye he could see Logan almost done and the girl on his other side messing up her hair, making it stick up all over the place.

By the end of the hour he could hear a few sobs, there was also relief, a few heavy sighs, someone making a half-sigh half-hysterical laugh, a general groan in the room and the defeated air in a lot of others. At least he wasn’t the only one feeling defeated because of the exam.

History wasn’t that different, but there were less sobs and more relieve sighs after that one was over. The language one was the hardest, because what the examiner didn’t explained was that it was an exams on languages. There were different questions in different languages and honestly Enhos felt like his brain was about to collapse.

And then came the only one that Enhos was sure he would ace; the so awaited test about heroes, heroes of every side of the world, heroes with different powers, heroes that were called villains when kids and the ones that were always called heroes. When that one was over the room heaved a collective sigh of relief and the examiner laughed

“Be free tired kids” He dismissed them with a wave of the hand and the possible new students scattered. Logan gave a slight nod to Enhos and he answered back with the same gesture. In the entrance door he reunited with Roman who looked like he went to war and lost

“Though exams?”

“You have no- Wait, yeah you have an idea because you just went through the same”

“Yeah, my brain is not working well either” He shook his phone in front of Roman “Want a ride?”

“In your beat down car?”

“Excuse me your majesty” Enhos rolled his eyes “I’ll make sure my future car is better” with that he dialed his dad “Yo dad, exams are over!”

“I’ll be there in 5”

“We’re driving Roman to his place tho”

“Valerie is at work?”

“Apparently”

“Okay, not a problem. See you in 5” With that Jeremiah hang up

The following morning Enhos entered Atlas again, getting as mentally prepared for the fighting exams as he possibly could. He might have to use Shadow a lot, but hopefully he’ll be able to control it enough to not actually hurt anyone too badly.

He sat side by side with Roman and both were talking when the announcer of the program entered the classroom, their hair was all over the place and they had a shaky smile in their face.

“Hello! Im Talyn and I am a teacher here in Atlas” They fixed their glasses and chuckled “Are you all excited? I mean you probably are. Okay! As you all read in the application requirements, you’ll have mock battles after this”

They took a folder out of their bag and messed around with the papers a bit. Then the giant screen behind them turned on and a hologram showing five different cities appeared

“Now, these cities that you all see behind me are actually owned by Atlas and are in no way real cities so you don’t have to worry about a thing! You can let loose with your Quirks” Relieved sighs could be hear around the place “Your enemies are… this!”

In the hologram the image of a robot appeared

“There are three different types of robots that will act as villains. Your job is to defeat them”

“We are fighting robots?!” It was a general scream. Enhos stared in shock, that was definitely not what he expected

“Roman… Roman, im screwed”

“Can’t really deny that… Sorry”

Enhos groaned, this was not a good thing

“Calm down, calm down kids, let me finish. There are three different types of robots and all of them are worth 1, 2 and 3 points accordingly and you get them by defeating them. There’s one that’s worth zero points. Your job is to avoid him at all cost”

They nodded

“Anyone caught doing un-heroic things is going to be disqualified on the spot! Good luck, you have half an hour to get ready”

Enhos groaned in frustration, he wasn’t even in the same arena as Roman. He knew enough self defense and martial arts to hold his own but the others would be using their Quirks, and he was at a disadvantage.

He shook his head and changed clothes, wearing a black tracksuit pant and a grey sweatshirt, Shadow still wrapped around his shoulders as a cloak. He went out along the others several students and waited for the sign. The teacher, Talyn, started laughing at them.

“What are you all waiting for? It already started. There are no buzzers in real battle you know?”

The class stared at them in shock for a few seconds and then they all screamed, running inside the city to try and defeat as many robots as possible. Enhos racked his brain to try and think on what to do.

He grabbed a robot of 2 points by their leg with Shadows help and threw him at 2 other robots of 1 point. He could do this; he could even immobilize the robots with Shadow and kick them away. That would work, right? He was in the middle of a restless attack when he heard a “Heads up!”

Enhos moved to the side in a hurry when he noticed someone was flying at full speed at him, or more precisely, at the 3 point robot behind him that was going to attack his blind spot.

“Gee, boy! Use your Quirk!”

“It doesn’t work on robots, but thanks for the save” He turned to look at his savior and raised an eyebrow, it was the girl sitting beside him in the written exam

“Pleasure, the name’s Lilly!” She pointed at herself and smirked “What’d you say we work together?”

“How so?”

“We cover each other backs!” She was still smiling, and Enhos gave back a hesitant smile “You make sure nothing kills me and I do the same for you!”

“Sounds fair, I’m Enhos by the way”

“Well Enhos, let’s go!”

With that Enhos and Lilly kept each other as alive and safe as possible. Enhos was still mostly getting by with only his self-defense classes and Lilly was destroying robots with one hit and flying all over the place. Enhos documented that in his brain; apparently her Quirk gave her super-strength and the ability to fly.

“Less than a minute! Deploy Zero!”

Enhos and Lilly stopped when they felt the ground shook. Out in the distance a giant robot stood up, taller than any building around him and big enough to be considered a Mecha from Evangelion. Enhos gulped and Lilly cursed under her breath

“So that’s the Zero Points uh”

“It’s not really a wonder they told us to avoid him” Enhos nodded

“Let’s go Lilly; we are the closest to him. We gotta run”

“Okay!” Lilly got close to Enhos and smiled “Hold on to me, we are flying out of here”

“I don’t like flying…”

“Is that or death, but your choice kid”

“Ah fuck, okay”

He hugged the girl and Lilly flew fast enough to make Enhos lose his breath. When she stopped they were almost out of the gate

“Come on Enhos, run!”

And so he followed her, cursing slightly inside his head. He hadn’t destroyed enough robots to be able to enroll in the school, so now it all depended on the written exams. Once they were out of the city Lilly turned to him and smiled

“Well, that was fun Darky!”

“Why Darky?” He groaned, making Lilly laugh

“Because you are dressed in almost all black!” She passed an arm around his shoulder and smirked “I hope to see you around school, this looks fun!”

“Here’s hoping I make it”

She laughed again, slightly slapping his arm. They shared a few more minutes of conversation while walking to the changing rooms and then said their goodbyes.

Just like the past day he found Roman in the door, his friend looked so tired

“Did you over did it with the swords?”

“There were a lot of talented people there Enhos. One guy was just throwing robots and debris and parts of buildings all over the place with just his mind”

“Telekinesis?”

“Apparently, but he never really threw things bigger than him. There was other that was just teleporting all over the place. One that had heat rays Enhos!”

“Hey, Roman, breathe. I’m sure you did amazing” He smiled, texting his dad “At least between the two of us you have more chances of entering Atlas”

Roman sighed and hugged his friend one-armed “You’ll get in, somehow. I know it”

Enhos smiled, he wasn’t exactly sure of that. But they still had enough days to wait until the letters telling them their destiny appeared in their houses. They still could be kids, they still could relax.

Unknown to both of them a pair of eyes stared at the boys with a grin. This was getting more interesting.

#necro writes #heroes and antiheroes fic #roman sanders #anxiety sanders #logan sanders #HE APPEARS MUAHAHA #also #Talyn #and Lilly appears too!#fanfic #do you like that small begining of plot?#[smirks]

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