#akk please please please this boy has so much love inside of him and you need so much of it just let him

[saladbroth]

idk there's just something about the way ayan continously pushes akk. he's relentless in it, and yet never goes too far and it's so so interesting to watch because it would be so easy for him to become unlikeable for being too pushy and yet he is one of the kindest, most understanding characters i've literally ever seen

like. in every single episode he challenges something akk is convinced off, pushes him into one direction or the other, brings him to his limits and makes him question things but it's never over the top? it's never too much, it's never ill-intended even if he honestly had ample opportunity and somtimes even reason to go 'too far' because, well. akk took some things too far even if we (and aye) can understand why

aye is just constantly trying to get akk to do the right thing, to see the truth and to acknowledge what's wrong because he knows that ultimately it'll lead to akk being happier, being true to himself. it's not a matter of aye being preachy and pushy and just doing it because he thinks he's right, it's a matter of him caring and wanting to help and genuinely just wanting whats best for people. he could've so easily gotten akk expelled right when he came to suppalo and instead he chose to try and make him see what is wrong with the system because i think, even if he didn't like akk at first, aye understands that he's only partially responsible for the way he acts and that understanding just gets deepened the closer they get

once he actually starts liking akk, caring about him, wanting to see him happy and wanting him it feels like aye really shifts from pushing akk into the right direction just because he can, to pushing him because he wants akk to understand and to see and to be less burdened the only time he brings akk to a breaking point he's already there to catch the pieces and hold him and make sure that he's okay. he doesn't let akk fall apart alone in the privacy of his room because he knows that he's the one who brought him there even if it was inevitable for akk to crumble under the pressure eventually

and now, with both of their feelings more or less openly on the table (even if akk can't admit it yet, they both know what's there) he continues to push and prod. he wants akk to say it out loud and acknowledge it, wants him to accept it by putting it out in the world, not for some selfish reason but because he can see the pain akk is in, the way he suffers under the strain of keeping everything inside. and he lets akk know that he'll be there, still

aye's gotten to glimpse into akk, got to hold him and be held in return, tell him how he feels and see the truths that akk can't say in his eyes. he's seen the way akk fought his own tears back when he confessed, and felt akk's thumbs move on his jaw as the only show of affection he allowed himself, and he's going to keep pushing. he knows that akk can get to a breaking point that'll turn things around, and he knows that akk likely won't get there alone, and he knows that akk needs someone to catch him when he allows himself to fall

idk if any of this made sense but i just. i love ayan so dearly, he's so careful and considerate in so many things and yet never ready to back down and accept things if he knows they can be improved. he truly just wants whats best for akk and he can see what it is better than akk himself, so he's trying to get him there with as much gentle force as needed. he's so loving and kind and so so ready to give his love to akk, if only he would accept it

#they make me sob #ayan is so special to me for so many reasons but his refusal to leave akk in his miserable prison of expectations #is one of the main ones #akk please please please this boy has so much love inside of him and you need so much of it just let him #akkayan #akk x ayan #the eclipse series #the eclipse meta #the eclipse ayan #ayan the eclipse #ayan x akk #akk the eclipse #the eclipse akk #khaofirst #khaotung thanawat #first kanaphan #akkayan meta #the eclipse the series #ayanakk

[bengiyo]

The Eclipse Ep 6 Stray Thoughts

It's time for the gayest boys and their various forms of externalized and internalized homophobia!

Oh, I do love a good ritual to enforce norms and suppress individualality. Man, I do not miss some of these things from school and clubs.

The homoerotic tension of two boys hiding from authority together in a tight space in the dark.

What are all these teachers up to? Sani is looking into World Remembers Stuff, and the Walking Frown is up to something in the office.

Of course Ayan caught Akk on the first day, and that's why he's been interested in him.

I don't know who started this campfire on the beach, but it's really contributing to the atmosphere.

I have also been where Akk is, and it's a terrifying place.

This exchange is pretty intense. I would like to know what else Ayan has been through that he's reached these convictions.

First and Khaotung are so good together. The sound mixing is not. I really love Akk allowing himself a moment to fall apart in Ayan's arms before he pulls the wall up again. Acting.

Did we see this wall and lights in Cutie Pie?

The insidiousness of it all is that I truly don't think Chadok has given Akk any specific orders. He's just instilled this twisted sense of justice and purpose in Akk. I hate it.

AJ, I'm sorry I mistook you for your twin this whole time.

Oh NOOOOO. GMMTV, please don't do any more of this student teacher shit. I hated it in Enchanté and I will be so pissed if I have to observe it here too. I will start skipping any scene with Sani.

I really hope Sani is trying to expose this school, too.

Every time Kan mentions the curse I think about the Killer.

I'm really enjoying Neo and Louis here.

I love that Kan slipped, and then hesitated to decide if he even wanted to walk back the admission of jealousy. Thua's smirk is great.

I want to eat Thai street food so bad.

Of course the cart owners are shipping them. Ayan's genuine laugh is great.

Sad that Akk has to hide from the World Remembers Gang because they might call him out on his bullshit. Glad they all have boyfriends and can go out together. That's lovely.

Look at all this impervious surface around Kan's home. It rains so much there. Seems like a bad idea.

Kan, maybe don't text Thua right away?

Kan's awareness of his feelings for Thua just gives me so much of an ache.

Ayan has a thing for putting Akk in this hoodie. Fanfic writers, you know what to do.

Interesting that Ayan didn't consider using Akk's position to get them inside on his own.

I do enjoy the bickering between Ayan and Akk.

If the support staff of this school don't stop ruining these high tension moments, there will be a real curse.

Okay, the sound effect of Ayan hitting the ground was very good

It's all fun and games teasing the head perfect until your recurring nightmare occurs while you're sleeping beside him.

Oh, that was a very good kiss. Wasn't expecting that to be so well done.

Looking forward to next week. What a time to be in BL.

#the eclipse series #thai bl #bl series #Ben watches

[crqstalite]

15* day swtor challenge.

*didn’t take fifteen days. not even five.

the challenge <<<

anyways, decided to finally get around to this bad boy that i reblogged like a week ago or smth. our toon of choice for this one is our darling darth tri’ama amarillis-quinn.

1. PROLOGUE.  Where was your OC before the class story? How’d they end up on the starter planet?

Tri’ama was born pure Kaasian (or so she assumes) to two unknown humans. There’s evidence there was another child born to her parents, making Tri’ama a twin to someone but she isn’t aware who. Adopted by two Sith Pureblood Lords, Raegia and Yusaits Amarillis, Tri’ama was raised rather well at the height of power. She had always been destined for Korriban, and routinely trained with her parents.

2. FAMILY.  Is your OC’s family a large part of their story? Why or why not? Are they on good terms? Are any of your characters related?

Tri’ama’s parents have always been her biggest supporters, but were always very withdrawn with their loving. Often their childrearing would be considered extremely odd, from the violent training and the fact they’d continually push her past her physical boundaries. However, Raegia and Yusaits were careful to allow her to grow close to them, so they’re always on good terms. Tri’ama is aware that she has a twin, but assumes they were stillborn or abandoned, so doesn’t care much for it. They don’t appear much in story yet, but they will soon.

3. NAME.  How did you come up with their name? What is it in-game? What do people call them? What do *you* call them?

Tri’ama was because I was beginning to realize ‘holy crap you can use apostrophes?!!!!’ hence why at least a 1/3 of my characters have an apostrophe somewhere in their name. It’s the same in-game, Tri’ama Amarillis (though I don’t have money for my legacy name). Sometimes Vette calls her ‘sis’ when they’re alone (which she LIVES for), Malavai refers to her as ‘my lord’, ‘my love’ when he’s feeling particularily adventerous, and her name when they’re alone, Jaesa refers to her as Master, Pierce is always ‘my lord’ or ‘my greatness therefore our one and only savior’ if he’s feeling like being annoying (thankfully he has a so-so friendship with her, so he’s in no danger of dying), and half the time she can’t figure what Broonmark is saying. I, call her bitch boy because she’s an asshole to literally everyone else.

4. COMBAT.  What’s your character like in a fight? Is there anything you wish they could do in-game that isn’t an option? Favorite in-game moves? How did you decide their specialization?

Tri’ama is chaos and mayhem on wheels, but organized. Everyone has their position and what they have to do, and when things go according to plan, things are wonderful. I think force leap is my favorite thing for Sith Warrior’s and Jedi Knights to do because I love just leaping towards enemies and going to town. I decided her specialization because I really, really like double sabers and the abilities that come with them.

5. WARDROBE.  How many outfit slots are filled? Did their look change over the course of the game, or stay consistent?

1. Literally one because I can’t afford to buy anymore. Also because I do more functionality than looks, so it depended on the planet. Whatever a Warrior on Hoth wore, she wore on Hoth. However, fic wise she did, going from having her hair short and slicked back, to having her hair long and around her shoulders during the endgame.

6. HOME.  Where is home? A place? A person?

Home is Dromound Kaas, in her old family home. Home is with her parents, with the smell of good food and the quiet nights as the rain patters against the windows and she falls asleep.

7. PLATONIC RELATIONSHIPS.  Who are their closest friends? Do they have a lot, or a few? Do they trust easily, or does it take time?

Her closest friend is easily Vette, being the first person who began following her. They have a sisterly relationship, and always has a joke for her when they return to the ship. She’s one of the two people that can get her to laugh (the other being Malavai). She doesn’t have too many friends, being not only a Sith but also being Darth Amarillis. It takes a lot of time for her to trust someone, after being betrayed by not only Baras, but Malavai as well. But, it’s easy to see that those she does trust, are there for her life.

8. ROMANCES.  A companion? An NPC? One of your OCs? Someone else’s? Nobody? Explain!

She’s married to Captain Malavai Quinn. Though it’s been a trying relationship (due to his betrayal and her inability to trust), Tri’ama loves him with her whole heart. They spend time together a little more sporadically than either would like, but what they do have, they treasure.

9. RIVALRIES.  Who do they hate most? What’s the fastest way for someone to earn their dislike?

Mierrio. Hands down they despise each other mutually and don’t even try to fight their corresponding lovers on it. For a reason that still has yet to be revealed in-universe >:)

10. SLEEP.  What are your OC’s sleeping habits like? Healthy? Terrible? With someone else?

Tri’ama actually sleeps rather well at night. She goes to bed when work is done, wakes up and then going back to work. In that way, she didn’t sleep with Malavai for nearly a year after his betrayal (she believes she’s most vulnerable while sleep), but now she can’t do so without him. Other than that, she’s the most well-rested Sith in the roster.

11. CANON DIVERGENCE.  Are there parts of their story that don’t line up with in-game information? Why? Where?

Yes. When Baras asks the Sith Warrior whether they know the Sith Code, it’s assumed the PC has no idea what’s going on, and has been rushed into the Sith lifestyle. Tri’ama has been part of the Sith lifestyle since she was adopted by her parents, and of course would know the Sith Code, and what it means to be Sith. She wouldn’t have been rushed to Korriban either, though she was heavily advanced compared to other students and would’ve had no problem murdering Vemrin out of sight of the overseers without the assistance of Baras or Tremel. Other than that, no.

12. AUs.  Do you have any alternate universes for them? What’s different? What’s the same?

One AU I have is the Faction Swap AU, where obviously, the characters switch their factions with the opposite class. Tri’ama became a Jedi Knight, which isn’t much different from her usual form, except that she murders less and doesn’t have an Imperial accent. Doc would’ve pissed her off, but she probably would’ve came around eventually, making it very clear that she was the one wearing pants in this relationship. The second AU I have is the Heritage AU, where she and Malavai have an unknown amount of children and...well it’s not written yet. Another AU is the lover swap AU (where I swap the companion lover and the PC’s roles), and Tri’ama would be the one stuck on Balmorra until Malavai arrives. She’s rather suave about how she enjoys her time spent with Baras’ apprentice and is extremely forward. Tri’ama, with her own trust issues, nearly refuses Baras before her life is threatened, and she purposely makes the robots much weaker than they should be.

13. ALIGNMENT.  Light-dark, or D&D style, or both, whatever suits you. Did you plan for them to be the way they are, or did your ideas change as you played?

Dark side, mostly. Of course, I didn’t intend for her to be merciful to some characters, but it ended up that way because Malavai was partially light-sided as well and Tri’ama wanted to please him. Her D&D Alignment is Lawful Evil.

14. POST-OSSUS. How have they changed over the course of the thirteen years? How do they feel about their past self? How would their past self feel about them now?

Assuming we’re following my very fractured ‘Made of Star Dust’ universe, Tri’ama has changed because being seperated from the one person that promised to never leave her again, and the person that she trusted most in the whole galaxy snapped something inside her. Some call her the Melancholical Murderer, because she kills due to her own sadness and straining sanity. Things don’t go right back to normal after Malavai and Vette return, and she struggles to trust those in the Alliance as well. While Ezridivia has tried to reach out to her, along with Lana, surprisingly her remaining trust in the Barsen’thor (Naji) and Mierrio. Tri’ama sees her past self as weak, for not being able to deal the killing blow when she should’ve. Her past self would’ve seen this version as insane, and downright scary.

15. FREE DAY.  Anything you’d like to talk about that wasn’t covered goes here. Fun facts? Not-fun facts? Go wild. I don’t own you.

Tri’ama loves, loves, LOVES, pets. She begged Malavai to adopt an akk dog (they didn’t, he made a remark that they already had Broonmark), and always checks out the wildlife on any planet that they land on. She also adores silk underclothes, and Malavai always complies. <3

@wolfboywarmachine !

#swtor15 #swtor #star wars the old republic #swtor fanfiction #swtor fanfic #swtor headcanons #malavai quinn #tri'ama amarillis-quinn