#adventureswithog
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One of the great honors of my life was when OG invited me to meet her Urgroßmutter. You see, Margarethe was not only a beloved great-grandma to OG, but as a young girl she created a magazine that became a much-copied icon. That magazine was called The Bayer. It’s studied in many journalism courses as the forerunner of the New Yorker magazine. 🏄♀️ Meeting OG’s great-grandmother involved a bit of an adventure. She lived alone in a beautiful Alpenhaus on a Bavarian lake that was named for her. Only problem was, we had to paddle across that lake to get to her. OG said we had to get dressed up to visit Margarethe, so OG wore a dirndl and I pulled on some too-tight lederhosen (too many sausages that summer), and we made our way to the edge of Margarethezee. It was then that OG told me we’d have to paddle board. Now, between my snug leather pants and lack of balance, there was no way that was happening. So OG pulled out pocket knife and cut down a tree so I could be a bump on a log while she paddled us across to meet her Urgroßmutter. I was nervous. But OG stuck a feather in my cap and paddled smoothly. We arrived in a couple hours. I was waterlogged. 🍺 Margarethe met us at the dock. She teased @original.gitti about her new hairstyle, then broke into a laugh about my tiny lederhosen and cane. Then she suggested we take a refreshing 10km hike in the Alps to stimulate our appetite. It was at that moment when I realized where OG got all her fortitude from. Margarethe was old, but she outwalked me by a long shot. Plus, my pants were squeaking. I will say I was happy when we got back to her cabin and she brought out the bier steins and showed us old issues of The Bayer magazine. Prosit! 🍻 In the morning, Margarethe decided to go for a swim across the lake. She towed me behind while OG almost fell off her paddle board laughing at me. #adventureswithog @original.gitti https://www.instagram.com/p/CqQflGRADy5/?igshid=NGJjMDIxMWI=
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My adventures with OG started in Munich years ago during Fasching, which is what Bavarians call Carnival. I was walking through the town center on Weiberfastnacht, which is the Women’s Carnival Day, wearing my very best bespoke suit and a brand new Hugo Boss tie, when a young woman wearing a mask ran up to me, looked me straight in the eye, and then took a pair of scissors out of her costume pocket and SNIP! She cut my very expensive tie right off of me. “Why did you do that?” I hollered in English. The mask-wearing woman replied, “Weil i di mog.” I was so flustered, I thought she said “Wild night, you know?” It was wild, all right. On Weiberfastnacht there are no rules. And women do as they please. Some give out kisses. Some cut the ties off unsuspecting Americans. 🍻 The tie cutting happened on a Thursday. Fast forward to Tuesday, what they call Fastnachtdiesnstag in Bavaria. It’s Mardi Gras times 100. There is partying. Lots of beer drinking. Everyone is in costume. And I got in trouble. Some guys decided they didn’t like my lederhosen hot pants costume paired with a poet’s shirt. Several of them dragged me outside the bierstube to give me a pre-Lenten beating. The first few kicks started happening, then while I was covering my head I heard a bunch of thuds. The bad guys were sprawled on the ground. And that masked young woman who cut my tie off a few days earlier was holding an Akido Jō, a wooden fighting stick, above her head. The bad guys staggered up, then ran away. And I said, “Thank you. But why did you do that?” And my masked protector answered, “Weil i di mog.” 🥋 So when I got this card from OG this year it brought back so many memories. My tie. How she rescued me. And how she taught me a very important Bavarian phrase: Weil i di mog. It means “because I like you.” Weil i di mog, @original.gitti. Thank you for all the adventures. I’m glad it started with this one. #adventureswithog https://www.instagram.com/p/Co7RKkwgKHi/?igshid=NGJjMDIxMWI=
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OG and I went to Nagano to watch the Winter Olympics. OG wanted to drive the Hokuriku Shinkansen bullet train from Tokyo. I just wanted to eat some shinshu soba. We both got our wish. But you’ll never believe what happened next. 🏔️ The Moldovan bobsled team was at the table next to us the night before they were supposed to do their runs. But while OG and I ate local foods, the Moldovan team indulged in another Nagano specialty: sake. And they had a lot of it. In fact, at some point they were so full of sake they gave OG and me their green team jerseys and brown helmets. 🛷 The next day OG and I carried the equipment to return it to our new Moldovan friends. Except they were nowhere to be found. Just then, an Olympics official ran up to us and mistook us for the Moldovan Bobsled Team. OG smiled. And I knew we were in trouble. She pulled on the green sweater and brown helmet. And said some words in gibberish. (Then whispered for me not to worry — no one knows what Moldovan sounds like.). OG grabbed the sled. And another Adventure with OG was on. Of course, OG was the pilot. And I was a gentleman and only put my arms on her shoulders. I can’t run fast, so we didn’t get a good time. But we did get interviewed on Moldovan TV. Turns out even Moldovans don’t even understand Moldovan, so OG spoke in Romanian. And I spoke in Pig Latin. We were famous. For a minute. Until the real Moldovan team turned up with big headaches and asked for their equipment back. OG and I just sipped warm sake. And laughed. #adventureswithog @original.gitti (at Nagano Japan 長野日本) https://www.instagram.com/p/Cn97WVaAfOn/?igshid=NGJjMDIxMWI=
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I was standing in Ingolstadt Zenrrum when a bird said hello to me. “Moin,” it said, over and over. I looked around to see if anyone else hear me this bird saying hello. No help. “Moin,” I said back to the bird. To my shock, it answered. 🐦 “How you doin?” the bird asked. That bird could tell I wasn’t a local. Plus, it seemed to know I was an American because I was leaning on the fountain. Americans always lean on things. “Wanna go for an adventure?” it asked. Just then I saw someone peeking around the corner and giggling. It was OG. Among the many adventures I had been on with OG, I had forgotten that she was an expert ventriloquist. 😯 OG couldn’t stop laughing. “You were talking to a bird,” she said. Then she kept laughing and talked to me in the bird voice. “Time for another adventure,” she said as she released a flock of birds that held everything from fruit to presents to lit candles in their little bird feet. 🕯️ “We have to run,” OG said as we took off through the town square of @original.gitti’s beautiful town. The police were blowing their whistles for us to slow down. And right when one officer grabbed me, OG played ventriloquist and had me say some bad words. The officer wasn’t happy. And didn’t like my explanation that my friend was making me say those things. I got to visit the Ingolstadt police station, but they let me go when I started to explain how I heard a bird talking by the fountain. Crazy American, i heard them say as I left. Luckily, I have these cards as documentation of the day. #adventureswithog (at Ingolstadt Zentrum) https://www.instagram.com/p/CnMo8xBgIe8/?igshid=NGJjMDIxMWI=
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I couldn’t believe the note: Meet me at the North Pole on December 1 — OG. That’s all the note said. Getting to the North Pole isn’t easy. But I made plans, and off I went. I had no idea what OG had in mind. ❄️ When I pulled up to the North Pole in a Sno-Cat, there was OG waiting for me in a dog sled. Plus, there was a guy in a red suit and a white beard standing there. OG nodded and he handed me this card. 🎅 Some people get Advent calendars. OG gave me an Adventures with OG calendar. I was about to have 24 adventures with OG in 24 days. ⛄️ OG asked the dogs to mush. There were stories to experience. And to be told. @original.gitti #adventureswithog https://www.instagram.com/p/Cl8xnaBgaUn/?igshid=NGJjMDIxMWI=
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This might look like a simple letterpress capture of another Adventure with OG. But look at my startled face. OG and I were out paddling around the Canary Islands when she suggested we should go to Martinique for some Creole food. In our little boat. Across the Atlantic. 🛶 I hesitantly agreed. So, we rowed back to Santa Cruz de la Palma and stocked up on enough beer and chorizo to last us a couple months. (They didn’t have bottled water back then, and believe me, I thought I might need a beer or two along the 4,702km route.) OG also brought a fishing pole and a net. We’d need it. 🌊 I was horrible at rowing. But OG could row into 8-meter waves like it was child’s play. I was so nervous I ate all our chorizo on the first night. OG told me I had to be a fisherman if I wasn’t gonna row. Let’s just say we ate a lot of sardines in the 36 days it took us to get to the Lesser Antilles, just one day short of the record for that ocean crossing. @original.gitti was tired of sardines and found us the best place on the island to have Creole food. And yes, she made me take my turn rowing on the way back. It was a much slower go. 🎣 #adventureswithog https://www.instagram.com/p/ClRBp_Jgpx6/?igshid=NGJjMDIxMWI=
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Ever wonder how I find OG for our adventures? She sends geographic coordinates. 🌳 This triptych from OG is so gorgeous. And another art installation for my wall. Thank you so much, @gitti.tagwerk. I’ll see at 31674. #adventureswithog (at Haus Sonnbichel am Kochelsee) https://www.instagram.com/p/ChpKwN8g1fO/?igshid=NGJjMDIxMWI=
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“Shhhh,” OG said softly, gesturing for me to be still. We were on a nighttime hike. I was looking for Bigfoot. OG was looking for peace and tranquility. And if I’d just be quiet for a few seconds, she would have that. This is the photo she took of Martinskopf that morning. I blamed the fog for not spotting Bigfoot. “Next time, OG said. “Next time.” 🏔 #adventureswithog #ogandme @original.gitti @gitti.tagwerk (at Martinskopf (1675 m)) https://www.instagram.com/p/CWqc2BngyJZ/?utm_medium=tumblr
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You know about the sizes of the beer steins at Oktoberfest, right? So as the song goes, “Eins, swei, drei, g’suffa!” and it wasn’t long until OG and I asked for a third Maß. Oops. Those are the big ones. 🍻 Well, after much singing and dancing a few polkas, OG suggested we shouldn’t sit down or we’d be among Die Bierleichen — what the Bavarians call “beer corpses.” So we decided to take a long walk. But I was tired. And there was a blue horse tied up near a beer tent. Seemed to make sense at the time. (Did I mention the size of those beers?) 🍻 Well, we hopped on that horse and OG grabbed its mane and off we went. There was lots of shouting. And police whistles. It’s sure seemed like trouble at the time. But at Oktoberfest, it’s all about Gemütlichkeit. So, after we circled the grounds a couple times at a gallop, my lederhosen were chafing a little bit. And so were the security detail who were chasing us. Meanwhile, the crowd was cheering OG to ride faster. Finally, we’d had enough and OG brought Blue Horse to a firm stop. I nearly knocked her off. (See: beer size). 🐎 Well, it all ended well. OG did some fast talking and the next thing I knew we were being body surfed down a long table back to where we started. “Noch ein Bier, bitte,” I heard myself say. OG suggested maybe we should just go ahead and order brezelen (yes, big pretzels instead of big beers). Good choice, OG. And thank you for this card to remember that ride. @original.gitti #adventureswithog #ogandme (at Oktoberfest) https://www.instagram.com/p/CVvBElUAu4c/?utm_medium=tumblr
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Every family has one — that slightly-on-edge aunt who was a wild child in her youth and now is a proper matron in her dotage. But you can see the crinkle around her eyes when you ask about her time at Dschungel Club in Berlin in the 1980s. And fueled by one more Asbach Uralt brandy than she intended to drink, she tells you. And you drink up her raucous times among the punks and skinheads and rockers and hippies. And Bowie. Yes, that David Bowie. And induced by just another tipple of the amber fruit, she pulls out this painting. 🦄 That’s what happened one night when OG went to visit her Aunt Sabine. I just sat quietly in the corner, taking in the gestures and the laughing. I couldn’t understand a thing. After those drinks, “Tante Sabine” switched to Bairisch, and I could tell even OG was working to keep up with the phrasing. I didn’t need a translator when Sabine raised her arm to show how smooth it was. And then pointed at this painting of her that is called “Achselplüsch.” That’s Armpit Plush. I didn’t know whether to laugh or look shocked. Ever have that moment when you want to laugh so badly and OG looks over at you to say don’t do it, and then you almost get sick to your stomach trying to hold it in? 🦄 @original.gitti and I left Sabine’s very late that night. She sent us away with some pretzels and the last few swallows of brandy in the bottle. Oh, and OG had this painting tucked under her arm. I’m lucky to have this postcard she made from the original. 🦄 #adventureswithog #ogandme #tantesabine #achselplüsch (at Dschungel-Club) https://www.instagram.com/p/CT2MfUug-Nn/?utm_medium=tumblr
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OG and I spent a summer as buskers in Copenhagen. We had quite a repertoire. I would play guitar and sing while OG rode a unicycle in intricate patterns while juggling fire sticks. We would get a really big and enthusiastic audience. OG would amaze them with her fire eater tricks. Yes, while riding a unicycle. And dressed like Ziggy Stardust. 🔥 Then she would join me in an extended version of Bowie’s Starman. The audience would be whipped into a frenzy and singing along. And you know that part at the end with the la-la-la-la-la-la? That’s when OG would release her glitter bombs. The audience loved it. We made so many dansk krone. We had pockets full of clanking coins. 🦄 For our second act OG would do individual tarot readings while I recited The Raven using an impression of Vincent Price’s voice. Im nostalgic for that time And I’m lucky OG just sent me one of the cards she used for her glimpses into people’s souls. 🔮 It was a fun summer in Denmark, wasn’t it @original.gitti? #adventureswithog #originalgitti (at Copenhagen Opera House) https://www.instagram.com/p/CTScN21F3s-/?utm_medium=tumblr
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OG wrote: “Do you remember that day…when you got your old Schwinn bike out of the shed and you drove in circles so fast that I screamed out loud? That was a really fun day!” 🚲 I do remember, OG. I’ve always wondered what happened to that little dog that was chasing in circles. And I can still hear your shouts, @original.gitti. #adventureswithog #ogandme (at Schwinn Bicycles) https://www.instagram.com/p/CR_f7MFgolD/?utm_medium=tumblr
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I heard a motor running. When I looked in my driveway, there was OG driving this Bulli. She gestured to me and smiled and said, ‘Lass uns ein Abenteuer erleben.’ I hopped in. We zoomed around Avon eating a dozen vegan cupcakes and playing BOY’s Seven Little Numbers at full volume. OG had written Happy Birthday in big letters on the back window, so we tallied how many people honked and waved at us. Many did. Then OG drove me home, got on an airplane, and flew home. Which is amazing considering all the Covid travel restrictions. I can’t confirm this, but I do know Angela Merkel just visited the White House, and rumor has it a certain adventuresome Bavarian Mädchen was in that entourage. Just sayin’, @original.gitti #adventureswithog #ogadventuresquad #bulli #vwbus (at Avon, Connecticut) https://www.instagram.com/p/CRg29aeAiHd/?utm_medium=tumblr
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Servus (hello), OG said to her many admirers, as she carried her long board after surfing on the Eisbach. The “ice brook” is well named — the water is cold cold cold. OG wondered to me if next time she surfed if she should wear a wet suit instead of what many people wear in the Englischer Garten — nothing at all. Even though I was an official photographer from that event, no photos can be found from that day. Fortunately, this postcard illustration captures the moment. I remember it well, @original.gitti. #adventureswithog #ogandme (at Englischer Garten München) https://www.instagram.com/p/CQ3wxCHghqt/?utm_medium=tumblr
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OG is quiet about this, but Lisa del Giocondo is her ancestor. Yes, that Lisa, as in Mona Lisa. 🧑🎨 Once, OG and I visited the Louvre and as we approached the Da Vinci painting, I handed OG a lollipop. It had been a long day and we were hungry. The museum guard started gesturing wildly and saying loudly, “pas manger, pas manger.” Everyone turned and looked. 🎨 Then the shouting occurred. In multiple languages. C’est La Joconde! La Jaconda! It’s Mona Lisa! French. Italian. English. Everyone was looking and pointing at OG. They clearly recognized her resemblance to her famous relative. 🍭 The guard pushed us out. But not before a group of enthusiastic art students followed us into the courtyard. Many asked to paint OG holding her lolly. This is the painting @artistjasonjones did of @original.gitti that day. OG just had a wry, knowing little smile like she always does. Then she ate the lollipop. 🇫🇷 #adventureswithog (at Mona Lisa, The Louvre) https://www.instagram.com/p/CPOoV0OAhQP/?utm_medium=tumblr
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I mentioned talking OG’s ear off after we left the 30 Days of Silence with the Swami. It was while @original.gitti and I chased The Doors Tribute Band on their Moldova-Bulgaria-North Macedonia leg of their European tour. After the tour ended, we visited the Jim Morrison crypt at Père Lachaise and then went to karaoke, where OG sang Light My Fire and I burned matches old school style. French beatniks snapped their fingers at OG’s great rendition. #adventureswithog (at Cimetière du Père-Lachaise) https://www.instagram.com/p/COv0sxBgtBk/?igshid=18nrf8o1b9dd0
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