#So lifting yunno hundreds of those bags for hours on end... you get some muscle!

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you shut down a transphobe at work? 👀 care to share ?? of course you dont have to, especially if it was a shitty experience but i love hearing people shut assholes down

I work in retail; my pronouns are listed on my nametag, underneath my name but above my job title, and I verbally correct people when they misgender me. I always assume ignorance over malice--retail has taught me that people legitimately cannot read and comprehend half of what's in front of them--and I'm good at my job so I'm always polite and cheery when I do it.

I was covering a loader's job with another associate, and we had an older woman show up. It's policy to sign receipts before we load customer vehicles, but when I approached her she comically started going "nuh-uh-uh! I don't believe in a women working this job!" and trying to give the receipt to the coworker standing five feet behind me, while still not getting out of her car. And I cheerily explained that that wouldn't be a problem, because I wasn't a women anyways! But the customer insisted, and aggressively gestured at my tits going, "Then what are these? Huh? You're female." And I got to go off into a spiel about how I was actually unsure of my chromosomal makeup because of an instance of colorblindness that traditionally doesn't affect people with XX chromosomes, and how I didn't personally see myself as female in that capacity because of it, but that I would still happily help her.

And she tries to huff and puff, saying that she "doesn't see color" (uh??? what??) and "doesn't believe in that stuff" and that she doesn't believe in "women doing mens' work" again.

I shrug at her, and tell her that regardless of her personal feelings, I'm still more than ready to help load her vehicle if she'd like.

My coworker's eyebrows are up SO HIGH at this point at this woman, and he's actually snatched her receipt out of her hand and signed off on it for me. He shoves it back into her car door window and she rolls the window back up, driving away from us and parking in front of the pallets of mulch that she's buying.

My coworker, chad that he is, stands behind and lets me take charge on it. Asking the woman to please open her trunk, picking up the bags two at a time to put them in the back of her car just so that I can flex, and chatting to her (non-responsive, pinched face) about what a lovely day it was. Despite her initial reactions, there's no other option she's left with other than A) Let me help her load the mulch and deal with the fact that I'm perfectly capable, or B) Go inside, find a manager, and complain until someone who is AMAB loads her. She folds and picks A, probably because from the combination of my cheerful attitude and my coworker's lack of intervention on her behalf, she knows that she'll sound absolutely out there if she tries to make demands. She blinked first. She stiffly thanked me and drove off after I finished, when I wished her a good day.

This is what I mean when I say that bigots are inherently cowardly when they get caught up in a 1v1, especially if you're acting (comparatively) like a normal fucking person. Their stakes in it are significantly lower a majority of the time, so they always lose the game of chicken they put themselves in. They might complain, might make side comments, but if you meet them head on they always flinch first. And being a trans person who often corrects pronouns and honorifics, someone who is ergo used to consistent confrontation that most other people would and do avoid, I don't know the meaning of the word "flinch" anymore.

Also, I'm fucking jacked from lifting bags of wet mulch and soil all the time, so they know I'm going to make them sincerely regret it if they throw a punch.

#ask #no joke those bags of mulch can get 40 lbs easy when wet. Soil is even heavier #So lifting yunno hundreds of those bags for hours on end... you get some muscle!