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fenfyre · 6 years

Text

The Most Important Things

I know I’m smack in the middle of another fic but I still owed my dear @karasawr a thing and what better day to post it than her BIRTHDAY! So this is based on the au around this piece of hers and it’s a mess. I hope you still love it though!!

It wasn't unusual for Marco to return to a quiet house. His shifts at the book store around the corner usually ended long before Jean stopped working and his fiancé's office was well isolated. It had to be and so they'd invested when Jean had made the decision to turn his oldest hobby into a career. A step neither of them had come to regret since.

Still, there was something about the silence Marco couldn't quite place, a kind of lingering tension in the air, an electric crackle on his tongue as he toed off his shoes and threw the keys into the small bowl on the sideboard.

He peeked into the kitchen while passing by. There were a handful of dirty dishes, a bowl, a glass, but the general mess from their cooking adventures last night had disappeared and there were fresh fruits stocked up in the basket. That was good, at least.

Jean was reliable when it came to sharing chores and it was always a bad sign if he started to neglect them. So on that front there was no reason to be worried. Why did it feel so much like there was something out of place, then?

Frowning slightly Marco stuck his head into the living room. A few magazines were scattered across the coffee table, a phone charger and a rumpled blanket left on the couch, nothing out of the ordinary.

Maybe he needed to check on his fiancé himself, just to let Jean know he was back.

Marco gave the softest knock before opening the door to Jean's office and slowly poking his head inside. They'd rearranged the desk and all his equipment after a few very undesirable accidents with very bad timing so that now they were all facing away from the door. Like this he could see Jean when he peeked inside, headset curled around his neck and face blank except for the slightest frown as he stared at the screen in the middle of his setup.

It didn't look like he was working.

Marco hummed curiously and pushed the door open further so he could slide into the room.

"You're not streaming?", he asked, voice low as to not startle his fiancé who didn't seem like he'd noticed him at all but still shook his head.

"'s Tuesday", he mumbled and yes, of course. Jean had changed his streaming schedule recently. Tuesdays were for morning streams now so he could work on other projects in the afternoon. At least during off-season. Maybe he just had problems cutting the video he was working on in a way he liked it or couldn't find the right samples. Or, considering the general slump Jean had been in for a while...

Marco smiled softly as he moved in closer, stepped around the desk so he could look at the screen. As expected.

"You watching him again?", he asked, even though it was fairly obvious what his fiancé was doing. The editing program Jean used for his videos was open and forgotten on the screen to his left while a stream was running on the centre one. Eren's face grinned at them from the lower left corner, chatting amiably as he clicked his way through the game he was playing.

Jean shifted uncomfortably in his seat and was already reaching for the mouse, probably to shut down the stream, when Marco leaned over and curled an arm around his waist.

"Don't, it's okay."

He knew very well how embarrassed and defensive Jean could get about these things so he didn't comment on the fact that this was the fifth time this month he caught his fiancé watching one of Eren's streams while he was supposed to be working. So instead he tipped his head to the side and pursed his lips at the screen.

"Really, that Dream Daddy game? Wasn't that hype over like months ago?"

Jean shrugged, rolled his shoulders.

"Was a request", he mumbled and crossed his arms on the tabletop. "He did a poll and all..."

So Jean had been watching for a while. Marco's chest pulled tight with sympathy. But he didn't go there yet.

"Of course they'd make him date the scruffy knife dad", he grinned instead, knocking his shoulder against Jean's who grumbled weakly but didn't protest.

"Don't hate on Robert, he's complicated..."

They were quiet after that, the room silent except for Eren's voice drifting up from Jean's headphones, too quiet to understand what he was talking about. But judging by the way he looked as he played he seemed to give a dramatic narration of the game, pausing sometimes to read over the chat and answer some comments and questions of his viewers. He looked cute. Happy. Sympathy throbbed harder in Marco's chest.

"I like his new setup, looks cozy." It did, the lighting was warm and fuzzy, illuminating the room that seemed to be brimming with all kinds of action figures and other merchandise, the shelves right behind Eren filled to bursting.

Jean paused, eyes lingering on the little square and Eren's laughing face just a moment too long. Taking a slow breath Marco decided this was as good a time as any.

"Don't you want to call him? Or maybe send a text, or..." Do anything but sit at home and pine miserably like he'd been doing for months.

Jean huffed and leaned back in his chair, forcing Marco to pull away his arm. That wasn't a good sign.

"I'm not doing anything", Jean grumbled and there was that bitterness Marco had tried to work around. It had been a futile attempt from the start so he wasn't too disappointed. "He's the one who left, he can call."

Marco sighed deeply and tried to catch his fiancé's eyes but Jean kept avoiding his gaze. So Marco moved around a little, dipping deeper until he was almost squatting and leaning in.

"He didn't leave, Jean", Marco said, voice soft as he placed both hands on his fiancé's knees and looked up at him. "He got drafted. By his favourite team."

"He already had a team, okay? And now he just fucked off and left ... us. He left. That's what you call it when someone just moves to the other end of the world."

There was so much grief in his voice, so much hurt and anger Marco's heart ached for Jean. For the part of him that was in so much pain it turned him this bitter. Marco sighed softly, thumbs running up and down the seams of his fiancé's jeans. He wasn't quite sure what to say here, how to react to Jean's grief because, well...

"Didn't you tell him to go?"

Because that was the worst part. It wasn't like Eren had just skipped town without telling anyone. He'd been open about the offer, about wanting to take it but not wanting to disappoint his team. It wasn't like him and Jean hadn't taken a long night to talk this over. But judging by the way Jean had acted since their friend moved there had been too many things left unsaid.

Jean huffed and reached up to grab the headset that was still sending Eren's light-hearted laughter into his ears, yanking it from his neck and carelessly throwing it on the desk where it clattered, then came to a stop.

There was a pause, Jean's face strangely frozen before he shook his head. One hand came up to rub at his eyes that seemed so tired all of a sudden.

"I can't play against him", Jean said, voice too level, expressionless. "I can't do it. Two months until the season starts and I..."

"Hey..." Marco reached out to cup his fiancé's cheeks. They felt too warm beneath his fingers. "Hey, of course you can. It's..." He knew better than to call it 'just a game'. This was Jean's life, after all. The one accomplishment among his many others that made him proudest, being able to represent his home town in the league.

"It's your job", he finished instead, voice low and soothing. "It doesn't have to mean anything. You played against him in practice matches all the time."

As soon as he said it Marco noticed the flaw in that line of thought. That seeing Eren on the other roster, wearing a jersey that wasn't theirs, would be enough to remind Jean of the utter betrayal he felt right now, no matter how unjustified. He could see in Jean's eyes that his fiancé was thinking the same but when he shook his head and spoke again he didn't voice the thought.

"He's so fucking good, it's...", Jean hissed instead, trailing off into a dry, bitter laugh. Eren was. He was absolutely incredible, if a bit daring at times. It was why Berlin had made that offer. But only time would tell if his new team could back up his suicidal style as well as Jean and their other teammates always had.

Marco sighed, thumbs gliding along Jean's cheekbones, so prominent under his touch.

"Call him", he repeated and held on when Jean wanted to shake him, wanted to pull away. "Not now. Obviously. But before the new season starts."

Jean struggled for just a moment longer but then fell still when Marco wouldn't let go. He huffed and blinked and chewed on his lower lip but ultimately didn't protest.

"I know you, baby", Marco continued, scooting between Jean's legs so he could kneel down and rise up enough so they were almost on eye-level. "I know this will kill you if you don't do anything. And I will not watch you torture yourself like this."

If Jean was anything at all it was a stubborn idiot. Sometimes, like when he'd decided on a certain project and worked tirelessly until it was done, that could be one of his best traits. But other times, like when his best friend and childhood crush moved across the globe and it fell to him to reach out and salvage what was left after a completely unnecessary fallout ... well at those times Jean could be his own worst enemy.

But Marco looked at him, long and hard and challenging, the way he knew Jean needed sometimes to give him a nudge in the right direction, until those warm honey eyes flicked down and his fiancé gave a defeated sigh.

"Okay...", he mumbled and when he swatted at the hands still cradling his cheeks Marco finally let go of him. "But only cause I know you won't stop nagging. Not cause I like ... miss him or whatever..."

"Of course not", Marco smiled. His fiancé could be so dramatic if he wanted to. But even that could, at times, be one of his best traits. He got to his feet and stretched, joints popping weirdly.

"I'll leave you to it then." Marco turned to look at the screen where Eren's stream was still running. "Have fun not missing him, babe..."

"Oh, screw you", Jean mumbled as he scooted forwards, reaching for the headset. Marco smirked, already on his way to the door as he threw a glance over his shoulder.

"I'll make sushi for dinner..."

"I love you!"

"That's better."

And somehow ... somehow it really seemed to be. If only a little bit.

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#EreJeanMarco #JeanMarco #EreJean #Jean Kirschtein #Marco Bodt #Eren Jäger #snk #gift fic #karasawr #esports au #angst #communication issues #because they're both stubborn idiots omg #they'll reconcile tho and it's gonna be super gay i promise

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