#Okay but listen you don't UNDERSTAND this is another gushing happy rambling and I want writers to know about it

[girlyliondragon]

More fic writing praise and really just for writers in general so... the moment you can make me sorta FEEL through a character as I’m reading something that’s when you know you’re a good fcking writer.

If I can feel their joy, sadness, terror, and everything else like, THROUGH them, not as a reader but as the character(s). I know that’s sorta like standard for good writing is it making you have those emotions as you read through certain moments but man I still dunno if I’ve found folks that do it as intensely as I do yet but man I have had multiple moments where I really feel the emotions through the characters I’m reading about on and am so attached to on such an empathetic level it’s insane to describe... I feel what they’re feeling in that moment, like I am them. I’ve had multiple instances where I would reach a climax that I know shit will hit the fan and I’m so overwhelmed from the buildup and know I’ll be even moreso I’m sometimes like “Aight I gotta give it a minute off the computer before I read this” because I’m reeaally feeling their tension and anxiety and all that but I haven’t had a instance of that for so long experiencing it again is so alien to me. The feelings I get from reading feel so real I’ve even gotten so distressed from stories I’d feel sick for a while. It’s not just a case of like going to a movie and seeing a really touching scene and crying from it like this is deeper than that I cannot describe it.

That level of Empathy is a REALLY hard emotion to get out of me if you expect me to do it for real people (For reasons obvious for me, I’m autistic and I have massive empathy problems irl ya know? it’s extremely difficult on a normal day, I’ve had to deal with family death and I still couldn’t get myself to feel as much as I tried and I hate the struggle x.x) but man I really feel something for fictional characters going through shit whatever that may be.

I love fiction, I love how it can make me really FEEL for the characters within the genre in a way that I struggle with irl. I love when writers get those intense emotions out of me. I’ll get sick from feeling the stress a character feels in the fic I’m reading and still go back for more just for the potential closure, IK that doesn’t sound good but in cases like suffering before you reach that happy ending that is deserved and you made me cry through the suffering feeling for them and being like “They deserve that happy ending after all that shit and I deserve it after reading and crying through all that” it’s an achievement to me to make me that immersed okay, it really is.

It makes me feel... idk. human.

And I will kiss every fic-writers shoes that does that to me.

#Emerald go the fuck to sleep #It's almost 2AM AND YOU'RE RAMBLING ABOUT YOUR INTENSE ATTACHMENT TO FICTION AGAIN YOU WEIRDO #Okay but listen you don't UNDERSTAND this is another gushing happy rambling and I want writers to know about it #Let it be known I don't like constant angst tho. I don't like crying and suffering all the time like #I like it in HEALTHY AMOUNTS if that makes sense #also please don't use this rambling to fuel some ''fiction = reality'' spiel or something plz don't make me regret writing this #I just have veeeeeeeeery strong empathy when it comes to fictional characters and ONLY fictional characters as well #had it for years in multiple fandoms even. it's the only time I feel human because I struggle so hard with empathy #in the real world #it's not something that affects me IN reality. More like I get THAT immersed in the fiction world. #that I just start f e e l i n g idk. idk how to explain it #In fact I'm currently reading something that I'm edging on hyperventilating from rn! #do you have any idea how hard it was to write this post while in that state I am going through some INTENSE shit emotionally rn okay #it's making me BR E ATHE #long post #Em Speaks

[severussnapefanfictions]

Severus’ Trouble with Essays

Severus Snape had only been in Hogwarts for a few short weeks. He had already proved himself to be an excellent student, well practically at least. Professor Slughorn had been particularly impressed with his potions, almost perfect, the teacher had said. He had very little trouble with Defence Against the Dark Arts, the spells came with an ease that had other students green with envy. It really impressed his friend, Lily. Transfiguration, well it didn't maybe come quite as quickly as some of the other subjects, but he was one of the first to see a change in his toothpick! It was with pride that handed in assignments, of course, he was brilliant and would receive the exact same praise when it came to his written work also.

He and Lily were sat at the front of the potions classroom, they had already cleared away, and had got full marks for their practical element, yet again. He sat there with a smug smile on his face as he awaited his essay. Professor Slughorn pulled out a large stack of parchments and walked up to the front of the class.

"This was very well written Miss Evans, you should be proud of such an excellent essay," he smiled down at the girl that was apparently a favourite student.

Severus sat waiting, wondering how he would describe Severus' work.

"Mr Snape," he began in an altogether different tone. "I think you should see me after class."

Severus' stomach dropped, he could tell from the expression on his face this wasn't going to be what he had been expecting. Severus was not going to listen to him wax poetic about how fantastic an essay he had written. Professor Slughorn laid the parchment in front of Severus, and right on the top in red ink was a letter he had never expected to see: P. Severus gulped and hid the parchment away before anyone could see, least of all, Lily.

"How you do, Sev?" Lily asked, her bright green eyes as excited as he had been mere moments ago.

"Erm, okay."

"What mark? I got E, which is Exceeds Expectations," Lily rambled on. "I wish I had got an O, but I guess I can aim for that next time."

"Yea, I got E too," he lied. "Was just a bit embarrassed, I think with how good my potions are I expected an O."

"It's okay, I bet we can get that next time!" she gushed as she packed away her books. Severus, however, took his time. "Aren't you coming?"

"No, I just want to ask Professor Slughorn something," he tried to smile.

"Okay, well we have charms together the sixth period, save me a spot if you get there first?"

"Of course, Lil."

Severus waited for the room to empty, slowly putting his books away. When the classroom was finally deserted, he walked up to the Professors desk.

"Sir?"

"Ah, Mr Snape," he began. "You have shown remarkable promise, practically speaking, but if you are ever going to make it as a truly excellent Potions Master, you will need to grasp the theoretical side of potions too. I also think you need to brush up on your Herbology."

"But, sir I understand it. I know how it works, potions I mean, I know which ingredients to use to counteract mistakes. I can list all the side effects of the dangerous ingredients you told us about last week."

"Not according to this." Slughorn pulled the parchment from Severus' bag. "I suggest that you take a look at the notes I put in the margins, have another crack at it."

The old professor smiled, watching Severus, as he walked away. Severus had similar conversations with some teachers over the next week. More than one suggested he get help from another student. Many told of how well Lily's essays were written, and that as they were friends, they were sure she would be happy to help. That was the problem though, Lily thought he was getting E's and O's. The lie was getting harder and harder to maintain.

Severus was sat in the little nook of a tree where he and Lily often spent time studying. He was curled up looking over his notes, and reading his potions book, trying to make sure that he had the right idea. He was thoroughly absorbed in his work and planning what would obviously be a far superior essay than the one before. He didn't notice the boys from the train approaching. Potter and Black had cultivated a couple more followers since then, a puny and rather pathetic pot-bellied boy called Peter Pettigrew, and a much quieter boy called Remus Lupin.

"Oi, Snivellus!" Black shouted.

They were already too close though. Potter grabbed his bag and up-ended it. Ink bottles smashed, parchment was ruined, and his battered books were lying the in the dirt.

"James! Have you seen Snivellus' books? Where did you get them, the reject bin from the naff second-hand book stall!" Sirius laughed.

Severus clambered pulling the various bits of parchment into his bag. That was when James snagged his potions essay.

"Would you look at this, Siri?" James called Sirius over, showing him the parchment that was littered with Slughorns notes. "He's been bragging about getting an E, and the highest mark in the class, but look here," James smirked.

"You got a P! Oh man, that's pathetic Snivellus!" Sirius laughed. "The bragging was bad enough, but he can't even pass potions!"

"I can still out brew you any day of the week!" Severus finally spat back.

"See, I reckon he gets Evans to do it for him," James declared. "Oi! Evans!" he shouted at the red head that was already storming over. "Have you been covering for Snivellus?" he laughed.

"Excuse me?" she asked haughtily.

"Have you been covering for Snivellus here?" he smiled. "You know, helping him cover for the fact that he clearly doesn't know the difference between Dittany and flux weed!"

"Severus is doing better than you!" she said confidently, her arms crossed. "He's also got better manners than either of you four!"

"Is that what you think?" James smiled. "It's all right here," he showed the parchment to Lily, who glanced sympathetically to her friend, who was shoving everything hurriedly into his bag. "According to Slughorn if he keeps this up he may not even make it to second year!"

Lily snatched the essay from James and pulled Severus up, dragging him as she stormed away.

They were now sat in the library, in silence. Neither had spoken about the essay that lay between them. Severus wouldn't even look up.

"Why didn't you tell me?" she asked finally.

Severus shrugged, his eyes focused on the table in front of him, there was one particular knot in the wood that he seemed to find particularly fascinating.

"Did you think I would laugh like they did?" she continued tentatively.

Severus shook his head, his lank dark hair swaying as he did.

"Did you think I wouldn't help you?" she asked a little more confidently.

Again, he merely shrugged. That's when Lily noticed a single tear hit the table in front of him. She reached out and held his hand.

"You are the cleverest wizard in our year!" she began. "I mean, you helped me so much in potions; clearly you just need help showing that on paper - I mean parchment."

"What if I'm not clever?"

"Of course you are! Remember when I put too many Lionfish spines in the potion last week, you knew exactly what to do to make it right again! I didn't. You are clearly just more practically gifted, and I can help you show it in your essays!" she smiled.

"I don't get it, you just write it down, what's so hard about that? If I can't do it, I must be really thick."

"Don't you call my best friend thick!" she scolded, slapping his hand.

Severus looked up, shocked.

"Best friend?" he asked. "But you spend all your time with Mary McDonald now!" he replied snidely.

[cxgan]

1/? It's N.A. I'm about to get a little deep for a second, so I apologize for that. But I really really wanna say that you are a wonderful person Kaden. Like you really are. And I seriously mean that. Like completely. I don't know if I can emphasize that enough. While I do have multiple friends on tumblr, there are select handful that I consider what are essentially my closest friends. And I consider you one of them. I'm sorry if that is kinda weird sounding or something (since I'm always on

2/? since I’m always on anon and whatnot - and that’s just do to anxiety). But, you’re really so freaking genuine and such a sweet person. Like, I feel blessed (as dumb as that might sound) to have found your blog. Because you are legit amazing. Really, Kaden. You are. Coming onto this blog and being able to just shoot you some messages, and just overall be able to relax and have fun is just something that I cherish so much. And I really do have you to thank for that. No matter how I’m feeling

3/3 I come to this blog and I feel happier. You are an amazing person, Kaden. And I’m so glad that I can call you my friend. - Your Nicotine Anon

NA WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU HONESTLY TRYING TO KILL ME? HONESTLY?

Listen never apologize to me for gushing to me I love you so much you can literally talk to me about anything and I will be happy. And no, that doesn’t sound weird at all. I’m seriously honored that you consider me a close friend and I consider you the same.

You’re so fucking amazing, honestly??? Getting a message from you just makes me so fucking happy I get so god damn excited every time I get one. So the feeling is 100% mutual, my friend. I’m so glad that I can provide you with some form of relief and thank you for doing the same for me.

And also, no pressure or anything at all of course, but like, if you ever wanted to come off anon or talk on another platform like discord or something, I promise I will happily open my arms to you. I would talk to you whenever you’d have me even if you just needed to vent about life or whatever. And if you ever needed a distraction I’d happily ramble to you about my own life and ongoings. I’m totally here for you. I could also respond a lot faster than I do with messages I’m such a slow piece of garbage at that. But I also 110% understand having anxiety and if you want to stay anonymous I am completely okay with that too, whatever you’re comfortable with.

Just know that I adore you and I will always be here for you no matter what.

#asks #nicotine anon #Anonymous