#Oh no oh no wwx doesn't have a golden core. I was too accurate in my homestuck AU re: lifespans. I want to go back. | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

red-talisman · 1 year

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My ask is about the golden core transfer and what it would mean for jc. So, if it triggers you, don't read it! I feel the need to alert about this! Be safe!

I don't know you, ( and yes! wwx was just a traumatized teenager!), but the golden core transfer gives me so much negative emotions. Fandom focuses on wwx's pain (and it's interesting! ) but jc's situation is dismissed with "you have to be grateful about it. What a disprectful brat he is" and I am like, dude, you okay? (maybe their opinions are influenced by what wn says, without understanding that what he says isn't the truth, but only what he knows would hurt jc, because he *wants to make jc suffer*). I tried to think about what *I* would feel and I triggered myself, lol. I would get insane if I knew that someone put my brother's golden core in me (transferring organs is okay, but in this? I don't know that it's from my brother! Also when people say that jc agrees to the surgeon, I don't know if they understand the concept of "informed consent") . It's disturbing. I can't even imagine how jc feels about it! How can you live in a body which is modified in this way? Do you feel shame? (this is something a lot of victims feel). And I am not even talking about what this would do with jc insecurities! No one ever appreciated his efforts! Maybe in the moment doesn't , but wn's "you would never compere to him!" would destroy jc! And that's terrible and unfair. And more unfair it's how fandom treats this argument! My loved ones manipulated me for my sake : this doesn't make anything better! I can't imagine jc's feeling. This ask is messy, but my emotions are messy about this. The only thing that I know is that disturbed me the way fandom treats all of this. I don't want to be too harsh but I would see wwx and wq as monsters more then heros for this. And I am not even thinking about how can you trust again someone who did this to you! People can't forgive cheating in a relationship, lol. Oh, and the "jc and wwx's relationship is destroyed by jc's jealousy" : I am like: you okay, dude?? But maybe I am the weird one. Sorry if I seem rude! But this argument just triggers me

Thank you for the warning. 🥰

(Under a cut for both length and content. Reminder that I'm a CQL-only fan.)

Fandom focuses on wwx's pain (and it's interesting! ) but jc's situation is dismissed with "you have to be grateful about it. What a disprectful brat he is" and I am like, dude, you okay?

From what you're saying, I think I'm hearing that while the whole golden core scenario itself is upsetting for you, what's worse is really more about how fandom tends to talk about it. If I'm interpreting that correctly, then...yeah, honestly, I agree. 😕 And it sucks, because I think the characters of MDZS/CQL are supposed to be messy, and there are some truly delicious, nuanced discussions about justice and love and sacrifice to be had! Unfortunately, I've had to be more liberal than usual with the block button to avoid losing my love of the show due to the impact of fandom discourse.

Honestly, I feel like the whole fandom response thing often comes down to a few overlapping things:

a person is inclined to defend whichever character they like more and/or reject the character who reminds them of people who have hurt them in some way, which is totally normal! But doesn't lend itself well to textual analysis so much as an analysis on this how a piece of media affects me personally, which is an entirely different thing;

whether some element of the golden core transfer reflects a personal trauma (e.g. bodily autonomy) closely enough to shape their perspective on this whole episode in a way that's different from someone who lacks a similar experience;

a person's comfort level in allowing a character's actions -- especially a favorite character's actions -- to be complicated, messy, and maybe even morally questionable;

whether or not someone has access to evidence-based, accurate information about larger social issues like abuse, consent, etc.

I tried to think about what *I* would feel and I triggered myself, lol. I would get insane if I knew that someone put my brother's golden core in me (transferring organs is okay, but in this? I don't know that it's from my brother! Also when people say that jc agrees to the surgeon, I don't know if they understand the concept of "informed consent") . It's disturbing. I can't even imagine how jc feels about it! How can you live in a body which is modified in this way? Do you feel shame? (this is something a lot of victims feel).

Tbh, I also have some pretty strong feelings of my own. I talked about some of that here, from the perspective of a religious person whose faith has some distant parallels to Taoism. And as a survivor who hasn't always had a say in what happens to my body, I struggle with some of exactly what you describe when I think about the golden core thing and especially fandom's common responses too deeply. (It's why I'm writing a JC-centric fic like Crashing Like Stars in the first place, honestly, lmao.)

I think what I struggle with most is the pageantry that's shown in CQL: how WWX and WQ have a whole theater around it that somehow feels almost as bad to me as the act of transfer itself, maybe because it shows how much premeditation went into what is, by definition, gaslighting. I always have to skip this scene on rewatches, tbh. The non-consensual core exchange is bad enough; the playacting feels like a humiliation to me.

And I am not even talking about what this would do with jc insecurities! No one ever appreciated his efforts!

True, but to be fair...why should they? As far as most other characters are concerned, JC is unfriendly, probably not very fun or pleasant company to sit down to tea with, very obviously cares more about his own sect than anyone else's**, and has had the reputation of a disfavored son for years. The only reason to make nice with this guy is purely for politics, but everyone else has enough of their own stuff happening that there's no incentive to try giving JC the benefit of the doubt -- which he wouldn't even accept anyway, since he'd probably interpret it as condescension or pity.

**Which is true for everyone, of course, but he doesn't have the charm or charisma to at least fake concern for people or 'play the game' like JGY.

If you mean that fandom doesn't appreciate his efforts...I'm not really sure what to say to that mostly because I'm still puzzling over HOW DARN POLARIZING this fictional character is. 😂 Even his haters can't be chill about him and it's rather fascinating to watch, like a trainwreck.

And more unfair it's how fandom treats this argument! My loved ones manipulated me for my sake : this doesn't make anything better! I can't imagine jc's feeling.

I think a lot of people confuse things like context and motivation for justification, and even more so when it's a family member and emotionally charged beliefs about family relationships get pulled into the mix.

This ask is messy, but my emotions are messy about this. The only thing that I know is that disturbed me the way fandom treats all of this.

Unfortunately, when not treated carefully, discussions about fictional characters can cross into more real-world consequences. I've certainly blocked people less because of a disagreement in interpretation and more because their line of argument betrayed much deeper biases that made me feel actively unsafe, and I don't always have the resources or bandwidth to try educating folks who aren't here in good faith.

I don't want to be too harsh but I would see wwx and wq as monsters more then heros for this.

I think it's a false dichotomy, honestly. I don't think WWX and WQ are heroes or monsters: I think they're young people put in horrific circumstances with limited resources and support, forced to make decisions with no good possible outcomes. Again, not meant to justify anything, but I think recognizing that the things we label monstrosity is, itself, a very human thing to do is the best way to begin recognizing why it happens so that effective interventions, preventions, and methods for taking responsibility for one's actions to encourage real healing can be put into place.

And I am not even thinking about how can you trust again someone who did this to you! People can't forgive cheating in a relationship, lol.

Oh man, forgiveness is complicated. Some people DO forgive cheating and even worse, for a whole host of different reasons and motivations! (Me, I hold grudges for years.) But forgiveness can also be customized to a situation: maybe forgiveness is earned, not freely offered; maybe it means letting go of one's resentment towards another but not letting that person back into one's life; maybe the refusal to forgive is itself an act of self-empowerment because forgiveness was always coerced and guilt-tripped prior to that. But again, we come back to folks in fandom not always having a solid grounding to have productive, informed conversations about this sort of thing, which can lead to some REALLY unhelpful hot takes going around.

Oh, and the "jc and wwx's relationship is destroyed by jc's jealousy" : I am like: you okay, dude?? But maybe I am the weird one. Sorry if I seem rude! But this argument just triggers me

I don't think you're weird at all. 😊 JC and WWX's relationship is thorny and messy and multi-layered, compounded by unaddressed trauma and mutually conflicting coping strategies and perspectives, exacerbated by the people around them playing political games with their relationship because of their respective positions of power. I think JC's jealousy is a factor, but it comes from being constantly compared and found wanting since childhood, and we have multiple scenes in CQL where WWX does something Cool (TM) and JC will do that half-exasperated smile or roll his eyes with a laugh or something that clearly isn't mean-spirited. The evolution of their relationship is made by a progression of smaller decisions on both of their parts in the context of family dysfunction, loss, war, and political powerplays, and I think flattening it down to "JC is just a jealous bitch" or, conversely, "WWX is just an arrogant asshole" does a disservice to WHY these goddamn characters have taken so many fans emotionally hostage, lmao.

LONG STORY SHORT I agree or am sympathetic with a lot of what you say, anon, with maybe some different perspective on other pieces, but I found that MXTX fandoms became a lot more lovely when I began using blocking features liberally (and, frankly, avoiding Twitter altogether).

#rt asks #anon #this got long i'm so sorry #'my thoughts on yaoi' by which i mean the golden core and fandom lol

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pbaintthetb · 2 years

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Ah noooo, I’ve been reading The Golden Ghost series for a while but for some reason I’ve only just now checked out your Tumblr??? Idk, it just be like that

Anyways, I just want to say a couple of things:

- Your writing is amazing

-Oh wow, I never actually thought about WWX being uncomfortable in MXY’s body and it makes sense? Like he was built differently originally and this is a body he’s unfamiliar with and I can’t stop thinking about it.

Just- WWX having days where he doesn’t leave some location, feeling so wrong in his body that he can hardly move without freaking out. Days where he can’t even be near anyone because he feels like a stranger and his entire being *aches*

Because being in a body that isn’t yours has got to be wrong in so many different ways. WWX is strong but like. The angst potential, I want him having breakdowns and horrible horrible moments where he can’t bear being in that human skin anymore.

I. . .really like angst

Kinda just thinking about the Burial Mounds as well and lowkey, imagine if WWX takes comfort in something that is widely regarded as evil? Something that people see as wrong and he feels wrong and can’t two strange things seek comfort in each other? Ngl, I enjoy sentient burial mounds and the sheer confusion that people feel that WWX is more comfortable with the dead on those days would be hilarious and sobering.

Just another reminder that WWX isn’t really himself anymore- not just because he’s not in his own body but also because there’s no way that the Burial mounds and resentful energy won’t leave a mark on his soul. Whether he has a golden core now or not, I refuse to believe that something hasn’t changed deep in his being the moment that he fell,

It’s just an interesting thing to play with, the consequences it leaves on his soul and the changes on his body that he’s forced to deal with for the rest of his life. For all the WWX and LWJ are an epic love story, the world isn’t all that kind and I just want to see them dealing with what these changes mean to him, it would be facinating

I’m sorry for the ramble, I got ahead of myself. . .have a nice day and happy writing!

Hello! and I'm glad you enjoy it!! You're very kind

yeah, no you've pretty much summed up a lot of my thoughts on the body swap like it has to be so uncomfortable right?? I almost sort of wish I was dealing with it in my fic, but it's too late to retrospectively fix it and also, effort (so I see why it's not really in fic ahah)

it would sort of extra fun in a GG work though because like there's this sort of- the body is very important, or at least from NHS' pov because it's his most accurate and true form? kind of? Like he's not physically his body anymore but it's still a fundamentally important part of him, and allowing someone to see it is literally putting his life in their hands- and then NMJ is like nothing except his body now, and then you have WWX, who's body doesn't exist and never will again no matter what, he'll never have that link, and it would just have been really fun to play with in hindsight

and yeah,the wwx that went into the burial mounds was not the same one that came out, not in anyway and not just because of the demonic cultivation (imo). Like he's what? seventeen? and goes through that, absolutely no way it did not have a long lasting impact on his personality mxy or wwx or dc be damned

sentient burial mounds is a fun thought

i feel like wangxian would get through it because WWX is very resilient and LWJ is very supportive, but it might take some getting used to and adjusting for sure

don't apologise for rambling! (sorry for a ramble of my own) Hope you had good day too

#ask #wip #wwx #wei wuxian

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