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femslashfeb · 4 months

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HELLO ALL

TLDR

No reblogging from the blog this year - posting prompts tomorrow the 31st

For the past few years I've very much struggled with reblogging everyone's activity in the tag. So this year I will not be doing so.

(OR maybe I will? I just don't want to commit)

Even if I knew how to make a bot that reblogs - a lot of people still use the unique tag to tag outside challenges. So I've always had to hand submit. However it became too stressful for me and for the past few years I ended up avoiding it until later weeks or even months.

If you noticed I didn't finish reblogging last year so- I've just given up on that.

Honestly I've struggled a lot with depression for the last 7 years or so. It's been harder and harder to find my way back to tumblr. It doesn't help that my phone can barely handle the amount of apps it already has.

My main account @puff-pink hardly ever updates because of my big sad. And I don't know if I'll ever get back on the horse in the same way I did before.

Some of you know me as an artist, and tho I still churn out subpar art for my day-job I've struggled a lot to make art for myself during my depression. Partially because one year I overworked my hand - and still deal in continual wrist aches. Even the weeks I don't pick up a drawing tool.

I intended this challenge for myself and maybe the small fandoms I was in at the time. But it took off among writers and creators of all types across all fandoms.

One year I even tried to tally the most popular fandoms but there were honestly too many to keep track of- and I stopped after the first three pages of submissions.

I don't claim to have invented the concept of FemSlash February. Before I started the prompts I swear I had heard the phrase somewhere. Tho not sure where. Perhaps it had been amongst my friends on Skype. Back when I had online friends and Skype(I'm still not sold on Discord🤷‍♀️).

However that January I thought it would be fun to partake in a challenge of some kind. But scouring tumblr and the general internet. I could only find half hearted efforts on fanfiction sites from years past.

I'm so proud of all my Sapphic creators on here that have partaken every year. Even if I've never shown favoritism or awarded anyone. I do notice those that actually complete the challenge AND those that keep coming back each year(looking at you H20 writer(I don't remember your username but there's a mermaid writer that's a writing machine)). I truly am proud of you especially in my shriveled state of creativity. Thank you for your efforts. For your hype. And for your love of women of all kinds across all the universes.

Each year I'm surprised to find even more categories I never thought to include. From mood boards, to doll photography, to ofc the classic art and writing. May your pencils forever be in union with your sister mediums.

On that note. There is a strict NO AI GENERATED ART or writing this year.

Not that I could physically stop anyone who does use AI. But I do not want that sort of thing associated with this challenge. It's become scarily good in 2023 to the point it can't always be identified. So I simply ask for the honor system when it comes to AI generated creations.

That being said. If you've made it to the end of this post:

Prompts will be posted tomorrow.

I usually prefer to give yall more of a buffer, but I've been busy. Both with Big Sad, rescuing some feral cats, my own life, errands, chores and work.

If you're still here- here is a preview of the first three days.

FEB 1 - black

FEB 2 - spring

FEB 3 - cake

The 14th as usual will be some sort of Valentine romance type theme(haven't decided specifically yet) and as always there will be a Rest Day.

Expect some repeat prompts. In the past I tried to avoid them but idc anymore.

It's also a Leap Year this year so expect one extra prompt to throw off the symmetry of what's normally 28 days.

Thanks for coming back this year. And thank you to those that still check on this blog.

❤️🧡🤍💜🩷

Keep loving girls

-PuffPink

#femslashfeb #femslash february #femslashfeb2024 #lesbian

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livebloggingmydescentintomadness · 8 months

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Hi Ashley!

I’ve been dealing with a chronic pain issue for about a year and a half, and it’s recently gotten a lot worse— a day of work’s worth of movement that used to be doable now has me crying on public transit coming home from the pain. I’ve been advocating for myself at work to make my routine more accessible, which has gone well, and I’m long term working on getting access to surgery that should hopefully help, but all of that is emotionally exhausting.

I’m writing to vent, because it’s been a really upsetting couple of weeks. But also I’m thinking about potentially starting to use a mobility aid, which I’ve never done before and which I’m finding really intimidating for some reason. I guess it makes it real for me in some way? For a long time this has been something I’ve just taken upon myself to grin and bear it, and just deal with the pain when I get home, and somehow accepting that it’s a real problem that I’m allowed to be accommodated for—and to be seen in public using a mobility aid— is scary to me. If you have the time and energy, any words of comfort or advice you have to offer would be much appreciated :) thanks for everything you do.

oh sweetie, i'm so sorry, that sounds awful. though i gotta say i'm really proud of you for getting accommodations and planning surgery, that's not easy. i'm glad your job is working with you and i hope you can get the surgery soon.

i've been disabled with chronic pain and fatigue for more than 15 years now, and i think the crux of what gets people so damn freaked out about disability - both those who do and don't have them - is this: control.

we want to believe we're in control. we want to believe we're in charge of our lives and our bodies. we want to believe that if we do things right, bad things won't happen to us. we're absolutely terrified of admitting that we do not, in fact, control our health. that terrible, painful things can just... happen.

becoming disabled forces you to face those facts. your body can do things beyond your control, and you can 'grin and bear it' with all your strength and the pain can still break you down. it forces you to see that 'mind over matter' is bullshit, that pain can be stronger than you, that you're not as tough as you want to believe you are.

disability forces us to come to grips with our own mortality. it forces us to see our bodies as sacks of meat and bone. instead of a tool for freedom and creation, our bodies can become prisons we're helplessly trapped within. we are forced to realize that this is mortal flesh and it doesn't obey our orders.

all of that? that's scary as fuck. it is fucking terrifying for your body to become a torture chamber. i don't know if i'm as scared of anything as i am the knowledge that the pain i'm in every day is never going to end. that it might get worse, that i might lose more control.

it is really fucking okay to be scared, to be freaked out, to hate this force you can't see or confront that is pushing you into admitting your weakness. it's okay to hate an outward admission of that weakness, that lack of control, even though you intellectually know that disability isn't something to be ashamed of and mobility aids are good things. it's okay.

i can't really coach you through to the other side of it, though, i'm sorry, because this is a huge, messy, awful thing. losing control and confronting that lack of control fucking sucks. being in pain fucking sucks. getting stared at or asked invasive questions because of your mobility aid fucking sucks. i hope you can treat your pain and reduce it to tolerable levels, i truly do, but even so, this process is one you just have to wrestle with and walk through over time.

if i can give any advice, it's to quit grinning and bearing it. quit anything you physically can quit that makes the pain worse or doesn't relieve it. for one thing, you might be making the condition worse and harder to treat, and for another...

you may have heard it said, but fuck, suffering is just suffering. it doesn't make you stronger, it doesn't make you wiser, it doesn't teach you lessons, it doesn't make you a better person, it just wears you down. you're not braver or more admirable for holding it all in, for not treating it, not doing whatever helps to lessen the pain, you're just letting your pride and fear get in the way.

take medication. it's very fucking difficult to get now, but if it's a possibility, use opioids when you need them. try other treatments. sit down more often. wear more comfortable shoes and clothes. treat your body gently. don't punish yourself worse because you happen to be human and this is out of your control.

get the mobility aid. practice in private, and if it helps, then fucking use it. use anything that helps. for the love of all that's good, do not suffer worse than you must.

this is hard. it's scary. it's completely fucking normal to be overwhelmed, to be freaked out, to be angry, to not know what to do. but you're not alone, and none of us are in control. not really. the sooner we make our peace with that, the better off we'll be.

#chronic pain #disability #anonymous #ask

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cailencrow · 9 months

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halloooo, little teeny tiny question… what was it like when you were participating in the Law of Talos tournament????

Hello! Law of Talos is around 15 years old now and I can recall many late nights, drawing into the early morning on sheets of printer paper using only a BIC pen as my art tool. I wasn't talented with photoshop and my shading skills were fairly poor, so I scrambled to do my best with what I had. It was stressful and anxiety inducing at times but always exciting for the most part. I wasn't in the best place financially or emotionally during that time, and my interactions online were all I really had to hold onto to stay sane in those days. The OCT community was a mixed bag of people and personalities and unfortunately with the territory came cliques. Law of Talos was a private OCT, invitation only, and a clique was behind its creation and many of the members of that clique were participants in the tournament while others were judges. It wasn't the most welcome environment if you were someone on the outside of the clique, and it was clear that certain people were being favored to win before rounds even started. The amount of bias towards certain participants was constantly palpable during the tournament and I don't suggest anyone who wants to run an OCT ever follow Law of Talos as a example of how to do it. I will say that I did have fun penning Eric Pockets' story. He's been an OC of mine since 2001 and getting to re-imagine him as we got to meet him in Law of Talos was rewarding. He's near and dear to me and I am proud of a lot of the work I put into that OCT. As well, many of the characters from Law of Talos were extremely fun and I had a blast back then discussing character interactions with the other competitors I was friends with. I lament never getting to face certain competitors, as I would have loved to have Eric do battle with characters like Steffi, Murphy, Chimbley Sweep, or Spoiler. A lot of good people entered into that tournament and some I am still good friends with to this day. One is even my roommate. I've discussed with Unknown Person my ideas for what an Eric vs Karl would have looked like and I will always mourn what could have been. I still, to this day, take umbrage with how my character was handled in the round where he was taken out. I do not think it's very sportsmanlike in a tournament where your character is fighting someone else's character to refuse to feature your opponent's character and it is unfortunate that that tactic was used in a couple of my opponent's submissions. Random unexplained demonic possession occurring during a steampunk tournament? Never did sit well with me. I suppose I can say that Law of Talos served more as a cautionary tale for me? My next OCT after that, Escape from Nevara, was somehow even MORE of a shitshow and almost didn't launch with how mangled the leadership behind the tournament was. OCTs are tricky things to run and you need calm, unbiased leadership at the helm with a good, solid idea to serve as a foundation. Ebon Spire to this day stands out to me as the perfect OCT, run well with unbiased judges and a group of participating artists who (for the most part) respected the story and the other competitors and the tourney actually had an ending wrapped up in a nice bow. It's a rare gem in the sea of failed or rotten OCTs. So, I had fun during Law of Talos and I'm glad I got to be a part of it in the end, but it was rife with problems from the get go. Practically a third of the participants dropped out before Round 3 and it was indicative of the health of the OCT itself. It will never cease to amaze me, however, how popular Karl became though, and the fandom that has arisen around Karl, Climber, and the Castle of Nations, paired with the renewed obsession over Law of Talos, is a constant bizarre delight. I'm glad that something I took part in almost 20 years ago is somehow entertaining a new generation of people and y'all in the fandom are adorable. I might not have had the best experience but don't ever let me yuck your yum. Enjoy what makes you happy and be kind to each other.

#old man yells at cloud

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