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sublimecatgalaxy · 1 year

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Heavy on The Heart

Pairing: Joel Miller x Reader

Summary: Since the fall, the readers been struggling with her mental health and, given the state of the world, there's not a lot of resources for them. But they didn't have Joel when it first fell, now they do.

Warnings: Mental health struggles, sadness, angst but happyish ending.

Word Count: 1.2k

A/n: There was a need for this character apparently so I decided to take it upon myself and write it for the lovely @causeimhappinesss!

On days like these, the world just seems bleaker than other days.

Its the feeling of water in my lungs when I first wake up, a gasping, clearing my throat, uncomfortable feeling that sits in the front of my mind- clear your throat one more time, y/n, it'll go away. But it never does. Instead it gets worse, travels from your heart to your lungs, your life devoted muscle pumping suddenly at the speed of life and banging against your ribs.

Between the drowning feeling and the motorboat running rampant in my chest, it's like a can't breathe, can't afford to get out of bed because it'll just get worse with every step away from my bed that I take.

I know that Joel will be coming soon, picking me up so we can go on runs for the low life's of the city, trading worthless things for things that could eventually help us get to Tommy, to get to safety. But the thought of seeing him makes me want to cry and the thought of having to put a brave face on and fake being completely and utterly miserable and anxious- it makes me more miserable and more anxious.

The knock on my door has me rolling away from it, deciding to face the window instead so the first thing Joel sees aren't the dark bags beneath my eyes and the scowl on my lips. Our frowns will at least match.

He steps into my apartment, I can hear the thick boots thudding against the wood floor until he enters my room cautiously, fingers rapping against the wall as he clears his throat. I give him a simple hum of acknowledgment and my heart begins to beat faster as I watch him step around the bed, eyes finally meeting mine.

"Hey." He whispers, sitting down beside me on the bed with a simple tilt of his head, looking over me with a soft, worried expression. "You okay?" He asks and he reaches out to rest his hand on my hip through the blanket, just his touch makes me want to fold into myself and cry.

"Not feeling up to the run today." I mutter with a tremble, my lip shaking as a cold sweat shines on my body. "You and Tess can go without me." I wave him off, pulling my blanket further up onto my shoulders as I snuggle further into the safety of my bed, wishing nothing but to sink into my mattress completely.

"What're you feelin'?" He asks, leg bouncing nervously.

"I don't want to talk about it." My once sad mood turns sour and I begin to feel angry at Joel for asking me so many questions and it makes me more angry to be angry at Joel for no reason. He doesn't know any better, he's just worried but for some reason by brain chooses to be annoyed by his affection that he rarely shows in the first place.

"Okay." He nods sternly but there's a sense of disapproval in his eyes as he gazes down at me. "But you can," he pauses, rubbing circles into my hip with a soft smile, "talk about it, I mean."

"I know, Joel." I sigh, clutching the blankets to me as I sit up, his eyes suddenly widening at my sudden closeness. His arm adjusts, wrapping around my waist to keep me propped up against him, my fingers busying themselves with messing with the buttons on his jacket. "Sometimes I just wake up and have this elephant sitting on my chest. Especially when I think about leaving the apartment. I just wanna stay here." I let out a sign of relief at my own confession, happy that I had the guts to actually admit it to him of all people. We're not the biggest on feeling things, especially with each other. "It's just hard to exist when the worlds like this."

"You're scaring me." He says suddenly, his voice dropping an octave or two at the fear in my own voice.

"I'll be okay." I smile sadly. "Think I'm in an anxious funk."

"You sound fuckin' depressed." He laughs sadly, reaching up to brush some hair from my eyes, thumb lingering against my cheekbone as I just give him a simple shrug, not knowing what to say.

"Don't make fun of me." I tease and I reach out to shove him playfully.

"I'm not, I promise." He whispers, my whole body relaxing into his touch and the way his eyes look over me, as if I'm protected just by his affectionate, caring, worried gaze. "I'll tell Tess to go at it alone. I'll stay here with you." He goes to get up but I reach out to grab his hand in mine, suddenly feeling a bit of a pep to my step as I begin to think about a day at home with Joel, all to myself.

"Yeah?" I ask with a sigh of relief.

"You seem excited." He chuckles, patting my cheek before making his way to his feet, backing up slowly. "Hold your horses, Tess is out in the hallway. Let me go tell her, alright?" He offers with his hands up in surrender and I nod, sitting with my hands folded in my lap but he gives me a firm gesture to rest. "Lay down."

"I'll wait for you." I nod, falling back onto the bed to get comfortable once more, watching until Joel is out of my sight and I can hear them talking out in the hallway.

I can only imagine how this makes me look in Tess's eyes, maybe weak, stupid, the lesser woman, but I can't find it in me to care when I know that I'll have Joel with me, all day, taking care of me and making sure I get through the day.

"Thank you." I tell Joel when he comes back and he's smiling at me with a cute tilt of his head.

"For?" He grunts an old man grunt as he slides down into the bed beside me, holding an arm out to me so I can slide into his side, curving my body against his and I lay my head on his chest, finally back where I've belonged for days.

"Caring about me." I draw circles on his skin through his flannel, ignoring the heat that's rising to my cheeks.

"Don't gotta thank me." He whispers against my hairline and tugs me further against himself, clinging onto me like I matter to do. Because I do. "I care for you like I think about breathing-I don't think, I just do."

-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o- Taglist: @bubblebuttwade @rafelover2405 @leslienjazzy @sorceresss @grxnde-dwt @alex–awesome–22 @bunnietoof @niyamar1e @serialghost @plantlungs @geniusohn @akaliltimmytim @lilaalouuxx @xshariex @elliotsbeigeguitar @elle4404 @lelieja @srhxpci @joselyn001 @taysirene @spinkspanther @thedivineuphoria @peter-maximoffs @tsukishimawhore @poohkie90 @szlaco @distantsighs @nstyles4299 @wolflover384 @givemefoodandlovesstuff @vane28282 @yeswhatever33 @amirrahfranson @vvaalleennttiinna @f-mu @yaspillz @jeyramarie @skylievin@abbybarnes17 @jointherebellion215 @visiondaddy @steezysimfinds @its-ya-gay-boi-luigi @crunchytoenailsyum@glizzymcguirex @beth123lg @melovesmut @rafecameronswhore @ariianelle @write-from-the heart @vampviolets@haylee-e @honee-chai-tea @lokiandbuckywife

@officiallyunofficialperson@heyaitsklaudia@rosepetalsparks @bluetreecloud20 @scenesofobx @double-shot-of-tequila @1dluver13xx @colbysbrocks @iamasimpingh0e @loveshineslikethesky @id-3-kbro @diorsitgirl @errorfound101-allideasburnedout @neverwillknowme18 @ellyskey @taylors-folk @loversjoy @myaloveee @thyris-is @lagataprrr @aaaaslaaaan @witxhy-lexx @minjix @luvroseee @tee-swizzle @savageneversaw @admiringlove @hysteriahall @piceous21 @starlightandfairies @igotmajordaddyissues @drewstarkey-wife1 @manyfandomsfanvergent @revesephemeres @rafesbae01

#joel #joel x reader #joel miller #joel miller x reader #the last of us #the last of us fic

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ryethebrokengae · 10 months

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Just thinking about Price walking into the base kitchen in the middle of the night to find you{Trans masc, post T and top chop reader} dancing to Closer by NIN[This shits gonna be nasty, enjoy]:

You were making yourself a snack, not being able to sleep. You put on your play list while moving around the kitchen to gather the things needed to make yourself pancakes.

One of your favorite songs, Closer by nine inch nails, came on and you started moving your head to the beat.

Once the first verse came on you started moving the rest of your body with the music.

'You let me violate you,

You let me desecrate you,

You let me penetrate you,

You let me complicate you'

You move your hips to it, spinning around while putting together the dry ingredients. While jamming out you didn't notice Price leaning against the door jam to watch you.

'(Help me) I broke apart my insides,

(Help me) I've got no soul to sell

(Help me) the only thing that works for me

Help me get away from myself'

You mix the wet ingredients into the bowl while head banging to the beat. Mouthing along with the words, twisting your torso in time with the words.

Unknowingly giving Price a great show of your ass.

'I wanna fuck you like an animal,

I wanna feel you from the inside,

I wanna fuck you like an animal,

My whole existence is flawed,

You get me closer to god'

Once the song gets to the chorus you're full on dancing. Head banging with your eyes closed, spinning in a slow circle while you roll your hips back and forth. Left hip moving back while the right one moves forward.

'You can have my isolation'

You suddenly feel Price's hands on your hips while you're turned to face the counter again. Suddenly stopping your dancing.

'You can have the hate that it brings'

You feel Price's lips on your neck, kissing you slowly. Whispering into your skin.

"Don't let me stop you."

'You can have my absence of faith'

You grin to yourself, resuming the motions of your hips. Now purposely rolling your ass back into his hips. Feeling him almost growl into your neck. His hold on your hips tightening, but not restricting your movement.

'You can have my everything'

Price suddenly shoves your torso to be pressed to the counter. Impatiently pushing away the ingredients you had laid out.

You let out a small squeak at his shove, teasingly shaking your ass against him.

'(Help me) tear down my reason,

(Help me) it's your sex I can smell,

(Help me) you make me perfect,

Help me become somebody else'

Price leans over you, nipping at your neck. A rumble coming from his chest in warning.

His fingers hooking in the waist band of your sweat pants, pulling them just past your ass.

Price let's out a groan at seeing you're not wearing any boxers. Running his thumb along the very inside of your thigh, enamored by how wet you are already.

"Fuckin' hell, Sargent." He whispers out, quickly shoving a single finger down to the third knuckle inside of you.

'I wanna fuck you like an animal'

You let out a yelp at the sudden intrusion. Quickly recovering from the surprise. Pressing yourself further against him. Head landing on your arms resting on the counter. You let out a loud moan.

'I wanna feel you from the inside'

Price hooks his finger inside of you, feeling your walls until he brushes against your g-spot. Causing you to buck your hips back, releasing a pathetic moan.

Price is barely hanging onto his self control. Quickly removing his finger from you. Shushing the whine that leaves your lips. Unbuckling his pants, and pushing his boxers down just enough to let his cock slap against his stomach. Resting the hard length on your ass, rubbing the underside along your pussy. Collecting your wetness.

'I wanna fuck you like an animal'

You feel Price pull back slightly, the weight of his hard cock no longer resting on you.

When you feel the tip of him pressed against the entrance to your cunt. Pushing himself forward until just the tip is in.

You let out a loud whine at the stretch, hips twitching down. Unconsciously rolling your hips down.

You hear Price groan in unison with your whine. Hand running along your spine, pushing your shirt up with it. Fingers pressing into your skin, short nails gently scraping your skin.

'My whole existence is flawed,

You get me closer to god'

At the end of the second chorus Price thrusts forward, filling you completely. His head falls back, panting slightly.

Your hands in the counter grasping, trying to find anything to hold onto. Panting harshly, cunt clenching around him once. Causing him to thrust forward again, pulling a small scream from you.

As the instrumental portion of the song plays Price pulls back and starts a good, harsh pace of fucking into you. Hands on your hips, gripping so hard you can nearly feel the bruises forming already.

Every few thrusts a whiney moan falls out of your mouth, face hidden in your arms. Price tut's behind you, grabbing your hair.

'Through every forest'

"I don't think so." He pulls your head back, forcing you to arch your back.

You moan loudly, clenching around his cock once more.

'Above the trees,

Within my stomach,

Scraped off my knees'

You hear a restrained groan fall from Price's lips. Thrusting forward harshly three more times, before you feel him start to fill you.

'I drink the honey'

You can feel the sheen of sweat cool on your skin. Clenching around him again purposefully.

He lets out a strangled moan, grip on your hips tightening.

"S-stop that" The Captain grunts out.

'Inside your hive'

You feel Price lean back, pulling out of you slowly. You let out a whine at the sensitivity. Pussy clenching unconsciously once he's fully pulled out. Causing drops of him to leak out of you, slowly dripping down the inside of your thigh.

'You are the reason'

Price chuckles breathlessly, squeezing your ass once last time before gently pulling your sweatpants back up over your hips. Cum most definitely staining the crotch of them.

You hear Price put himself back in his boxers. Before rebuckling his pants, while you catch your breath. He rubs your back through your shirt, leaning forwards to press a kiss to the back of your neck.

'I stay alive'

"Looks like you're gonna need new pancake mix." He whispers into your ear.

You turn your head to find you had spilled all of your pancake mix on the counter during your 'activities'. Somehow only getting a few drops on your skin.

You groan in frustration, dropping your head onto the counter again.

Price chuckles. Rubbing your back again, before you no longer feel him behind you. Peaking your eyes open you see Price grabbing paper towels to wipe up the mess.

You push yourself off of the counter to help him clean up. But he tut's at you, shaking his head.

"No no, you just sit there for me. I've got this." He says, picking you up to sit you on the counter. Pressing a sweet kiss to your cheek.

You feel yourself flush watching your Captain clean up spilt batter, then re-gathering the ingredients to make a new batch. His eyes moving from the task at hand and back to you all the while.

&A/n: I'm still working on the Simon Riley smut, but I thought of this in the middle of the night while I was making myself a pancake XD.

And pretend the song isn't just 6 minutes lmaooo

#captain john price #john price smut #john price x reader #john price #captain price #captain john price smut #captain price smut #captain price x reader smut

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miyaagis · 3 years

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*head in hands* iwaizumi with a super hot step sister and all his friends talk about how they wanna fuck her, and iwa feels the exact same way and ends up fucking her while their parents on are a grocery run

adhsjw YESS !! head in hands !!

+ pairing. iwaizumi h. / fem reader

+ warnings. stepcest, degradation, dacryphilia, exhibitionism

“i feel sorry for you, having a sis that hot and not getting to bang her? tragic.”

“as long as I have a face, she'll always have a seat.”

“iwa-chan! what do you think about becoming brothers in law?"

a sob leaves your mouth as you desperately cling onto the headboard, trying to ease the sting in your scalp.

“filthy whore,” iwaizumi tugs at your hair once more, watching as you quiver underneath him with a pathetic whine, “you love having three dicks hard and ready for you, don't you?"

“haji-nii please... it hurts!”

his hand lands on your ass, watching it jiggle before groping the flesh between his fingers, “good. maybe that'll teach you to stop being a slut whenever my friends are around.”

is it that bad that you like the attention? they are all very handsome men, and your own stepbrother barely looked your way. unless he was in the mood to fuck you, he would treat you as if you didn't exist. so if this was the way to get him to notice you, then you'd do it all over again.

his thick cock throbs against your walls, the head reaching your cervix and nudging those sweet spots that have you creaming immediately around him.

"fuck– so fucking needy for my cock," you're babbling at this point, too fucked out to reply or process whatever he's saying, "this cunt's all mine, are we clear?"

"we're back!"

multiple steps can be heard on the stairs, but neither of you care, too busy focusing on reaching your orgasm.

“oi, iwaizumi! where’s your–”

he groans when your walls clench around his cock, pulling you up until your back is pressed against his chest as the door of his room opens.

the three intruders get a good look of your naked breasts, tangled hair and ruined face while iwaizumi keeps fucking you.

“she’s busy cumming on my dick," he says, a malicious smirk on his lips as his hand goes to your clit.

you squirm and sob as your juices gush onto his cock while he pumps loads of cum into your cunt, groaning as he feels it spasm around him.

"tragic. right?"

#iwaizumi.xo #tw.stepcest #tw.degradation #iwa brainrot made me finish this sooner than expected #☁️.thirst #hq.xo

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katsukikitten · 4 years

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JUST IN TIME FOR SAME DAY TWO FICS I PROMISED. @pazumi-au

You waltz back into the living room as Kirishima yells into the head set. Little do you know why he has it on in the first place.

At first it was to get teammates together to win a better game but it quickly turned into the purpose of drowning out your moans.

He yells again, telling his teammate that he can take the flag there until you plop onto his lap. Straddling him as your hands go beneath his loose muscle tee. Hips grinding slightly to entice him as you would Bakugou. You feel him twitch beneath you while heating the all too familiar sound of a console powering down.

Hook, line, and sinker.

You gaze into his ruby gaze as your eyes scream lust, hands fondling muscles that move to readjust your body. You don't know how long he's dreamed of this exact situation.

Of you interrupting a game session or finishing a game session with him just to ride his cock all night.

But he was always too much a gentleman to ask if you were interested. Especially after he saw you smiling at your phone so often.

Funny how he hesitates even now and you present yourself to him. He searches your eyes for something more but all he sees is white hot lust.

You stare deeply into his eyes, noticing the slight differences in their eye colors. Glistening softness vs glowering burning intensity.

"Y...y/n?" He asks with a slight blush, although you're more than sure it's not from embarrassment as you feel him harden beneath you. Another twitch has you kissing him before you can change your mind. Tongue rolling over tongue as you grind a bit more on him.

His hands roll up your sides, peeling off your shirt to reveal a nice pair of tits. He salivates as you shove them in his face, reaching for your phone. You snap a picture of Kirishima's sharp teeth biting gently into your collar bone as he all but worships you.

You send the photo to Bakugou quickly tossing your phone to the side.

Another harder bite on your collar bone has you moaning.

"Bakugoooo." Instantly the man beneath you freezes as hot embarrassment flushes your body.

"Y/N?" Kirishima pushes you back slightly to see your face. Hard on dying from both the hurt in his chest and the the hurt in your face, "Is Bakugou the hero who's 'just a friend'?"

The question has you burst into tears, sobbing as you press your face into the cool skin of his neck. Breathing in his comforting scent of sandalwood cologne and soft natural musk.

His arms fly around you tightly. Gladly falling back into the best friend category especially so since this is the first time he's seen you cry.

And you've lived with him for three and a half years.

You both were broke as hell desperately needing a roommate in order to survive in this part of the city.

You a photographer and painter and he a start up hero.

You both made more than enough to have your own apartment within the first six months but somehow the two of you just kept renewing the lease. More than happy to "save" for a house.

So to hold the strongest woman he knew as she sobbed was an honor.

Even if it meant only being the shoulder to cry on.

"I..I'm so stupid Eiji. So fucking dumb. I..." Another sob as you try to collect yourself, "I really fucking like him and then I go and use you to spite him. I'm sorry Eji I'm sorry I'm such a slut. I'm sorry."

Is all you can say as you clutch onto his shirt as if you had been lost and he was the first to find you.

The first to be salvation.

"Hey..." He soothes pushing his own hurt pride down, "It's okay. Just don't do it again. I know you're sad...."

"I'm sorry...." You say again wiping away the tears as you borderline hyperventilate.

"Here." Kirishima says pulling his shirt from his toned form to shield you from non existant prying eyes, "You wanna catch up on some anime? Eat some iiiicccceeeecreeeaam?"

You nod shyly as he lifts you onto the couch, wrapping you in the faux fur blanket you insisted should be in the living room before he heads to his room for another shirt. He comes back just as quickly to see you staring down at your phone with sniffles, he turns on his heel to pop into your room, careful to avoid anything on the floor or night stand.

He grabs your favorite giant plush and returns.

Little does he know it's one Bakugou won for you. But your face doesn't become crestfallen when he tucks it in your arms.

More tears prick your eyes as his actions remind you of Bakugou's normal after care. The rare time where his wall his down and he speaks so softly.

And just for you. Your heart squeezes in your chest as you think of the moments you fell in love with him.

"I'll be right back. Kay?" Kirishima says before slipping out the door.

Not ten minutes later he finds you in the same spot, although you do have the anime series you two were watching pulled up. Your crying had slowed but not by much as you stare down at what must be a dry phone.

He places the icecream in your hand sitting beside you. He watches you snap a picture of you holding your stuffy and the icecream to send to Bakugou before you lean into him a little like you normally would.

Kirishima is happy to be your shoulder to cry on. Silently he is rooting for you two. Especially now that he knows what must be going on. He's seen the way the two of you look at each other at parties.

More than lust lies in both yours and his scarlet eyes.

Kirishima pulls you closer to place a soft kiss on your hair line before the two of you settle in for a long night of anime.

You wake to the sound of banging on the door. You breathe in deeply as Kirishima startles beneath you. Having fallen asleep in what has to be the most uncomfortable position you've ever seen.

"Sorry. I'll get it." You say softly as you stand, stretching as you assume it's your neighbor two doors down looking for her lost kitten. Again.

"Sorry I haven't seen your kitten." You say opening the door without looking, instantly regretting not only your choice of words but your outfit. Scarlet eyes stare you down as he pushes past you into you into the apartment.

He cannot tell if you are being a brat or not.

He cannot tell if you slept with his best friend or not especially with the two conflicting pictures you sent.

"Oh uhh Hey Bakugou!" Kirishima scratches the back of his head awkwardly. Scarlet eyes notices his outfit. A brick red shirt and jeans.

No one puts jeans back on after they fuck, at least not in their own house. Still Bakugou keeps his hands deep in his black dress pants, still clad in a collared shirt, loosened tie and black vest from his early morning debriefing.

He would have been at apartment 3C earlier if it hadn't been for that stupid fucking meeting.

"You might want to leave." He keeps his voice even yet still his normal gruff as he speaks to Kirishima. The red head nods in agreement before looking to you.

Poor exhausted cried out you. He swallows thickly and whispers to you as he leaves out the door.

"Tell him and text me if you need me." With that Kirishima closes the door to leave you sealed inside with a deadly tiger.

"Care to explain, kitten?" He lets his eyes rove over the semi messy apartment, a pizza box and empty icecream containers litter the coffee table, the stuff animal he won, or more so threatened the game worker at the fair sits on the couch slightly tucked into the blanket.

"Or is it as you said and you are not my kitten anymore?"

Shit. He took your words seriously when they were intended for someone else entirely. If you told him the truth would he believe you.

"I'm still your kitten, sama." You say softly, avoiding eye contact. Still exhausted from the night before.

"Yea?" He asks coming closer, bending down to catch your eyes, hands still in his pockets to keep from popping, "Then prove it."

You rack your brain of all of his favorite lewd things you do for him and think of only one thing that has him admit you're in control. You sink to your knees, hands going to unbuckle his pants when a calloused hand seizes your throat. Choking you as he lifts you back up to your feet. Furry clouds his eyes as he looms over you.

"This is not what *my* kitten would do." He snarls, "*My* kitten would defy me until I pushed her to her knees. My kitten is disobedient. She shows her claws and bears her teeth when she's mad."

"And she's always fucking mad." He snaps letting you go to sit on the couch. He waits for you to follow and when you do not he slaps his knee hard.

You gulp as you wonder if this is the other half of your punishment.

You crawl over his lap for him to growl over your shorts. The ones that drive him mad even when he's pissed. Like now you feel him growing hard especially after he massages your ass to warm it up. He waits for any sort of protest before he comes down with a hard slap. You whince as he waits, eyes falling to your head, when you nod yes to go on he proceeds to spank you over and over again. Massaging and moving to other parts of the ass but relentlessly attacking.

"This is for wearing these around Eijirou." Another slap before a cool rub down, "This is for making me think you fucked him."

As his hand rubs over your ass and down between your thighs he speaks again.

"Are you going to tell me why you were eating icecream and snuggling with King explosion murder?" He asks referring to your fluffy angry looking bear. You're still unable to answer earning another spank, you cry out but he continues.

"You only eat icecream when you're sad." More silence and another hit this time increased intensity with aid of his quirk.

"P..please please sir. I'm..." You swallow a bit of your pride as he brings another blasting palm to your ass, "I'm starting to hurt."

"Ah so you do know how to use your words." He rubs his fingers against your dampening shorts and you buck for better access. He slaps your ass again, "Kitten gets spanked until she tells me what's really got her acting out."

One, two, three more slaps before tears are welling in your eyes. Still he looks to your head for a nod of approval when it doesn't come he decides he will do a final slap before trying a different approach.

This slap sends you over the edge as you think and think and God damn think.

"I like you. Like really like *like* you and I wanted you to be my fucking valentine!" You yell out, tears slipping down cheeks. You're righted quickly, he has you straddling him as he looks up at you.

His eyes are the same as they are during after care. Kind, soft, worried and only ever for you. Your heart pounds faster in your chest as he pushes some hair out of the way.

"Y/N....my kitten why didn't you tell me?" His voice is laced with hurt as he searches your eyes.

"Because I told you no feelings and then I go and fuck it all up!" He squeezes your ribs before his hand wipes away more tears. He gives you a soft smile that slowly turns into a deadly smirk.

"I guess I fucked up too huh?" He kisses you tenderly before putting in all of his burning passion onto your lips. Tongue fighting yours as you start to grind into his hips. He breaks the kiss hands falling to your hips placing the ball in your court.

"You like like me?" You ask, hands crumpling his nice dress shirt.

"No." He says slyly, kissing your forehead, "I love you."

You blink, heart bursting in your chest as you stare down the most emotionally unavailable man you knew. Or at least thought he was emotionally unavailable.

"Have been. For months." He admits, now it is your turn to kiss him, one hand working to free his member while his hands move aside the shorts.

"Are you sure?"

"Always Sama. Please." You say desperately before he aligns himself to plunge into you. You gasp, holding his eyes as this is the first time you've faced him.

All the other times you had asked to be bent over or blind folded.

He slowly thrusts into you before you ride him out, wanting to give him pleasure for once. He squeezes your hips as you're in charge praising your work and movements as you begin to chase your own high.

"Fuuuuck. You're riding me so well." He says coming up to bite on your collar bones, sucking hard enough to leave small bruises. You feel him twitch in your as he gets closer causing the tightness in your stomach to double.

You were going to make him come all your own. You hump harder as your clit rubs against his boxers just right causing your moans to come out shuddering.

"I..I'm close." You gasp out, core grasping onto his hard memeber for all that it's worth.

"Cum for me kitten." He breaths and he thrusts into you, holding your eyes causing you to come wholly undone. Emotionally physically and as cliche as it sounded spiritually as you watched face contort in sinful pleasure as he fucked deeply into you, hand pressing your forehead harshly to his as he filled you to the brim.

The two of you are quiet for a moment, his grip letting up as your tightens on him. You get up off of him but do not leave his lap. He stares up at you with even newer eyes, your body shudders on it's own from his duality you so desperately needed.

"Be my valentine kitten?" He asks softly supporting you even though you are on top. You smile down at him before your inner brat takes over, stealing a feverish kiss before adding.

"I thought a King never asks."

@lady-bakuhoe here is the kirishima part 😊

#bnha angst #bnha fluff #kitten valnetines day event!#bnha x reader #bakugou smut #bakugo smut #katsuki bakugo #bakugou katsuki #katsuki bakugou #katsuki bakugo x reader #mha bakugou #bnha smut #bnha kacchan #bnha fic #bnha fanfiction #bnha asks

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champhangman · 4 years

Text

Scars

Characters: Seth Rollins X OFC / OFC x Drew McIntyre Summary: You're like a shooting star in the rain, you're everything that feels like home to me. // Her past. Her present. Her forever. Word Count: 6,831 A/N: This story is…different for me. A little, at least. Special thank you to Ashley ( @cowboysht )for the beautiful banner. Also, thank you to her and my beloved Emi ( @adampage) for their unfailing screeching, overuse of exclamation points, abuse of the phrases "what the fuck" "fuck off omg" "AAAHHHHHH", for assuring me that this is SUCH GOOD SHIT, and, above all else, for being the two biggest cheerleaders an old lady like me could have.

Tag list under the cut!

@baysexuality / @lilmisswhiskeygypsy / @evilangel84 / @bigpixiefoot / @mindofasagittaruis / @sadcountess / @kallravenne / @baronsbelleevangeline

***

Part 1/??

"Sadie?"

At the sound of his voice, Sadie Gibbs looked up from her hands. "Hey," she said. Her smile was brief. "How'd you find me?"

Seth Rollins smiled and leaned against the wall across from her. She was practically hunched on a crate at the end of a quiet hallway, well out of sight of anyone. Entrusted with the secret of her surprise return, he'd immediately gone to the small room she was supposed to be hidden in until her surprise later. After finding it empty, he'd had an inkling that he would find her as far away from the pre-show action as possible while still in the building. Which he had. He doubted anyone knew the dead-end hallway existed save for the crew that had pushed the empty crates into it. "You always find the quietest spot to hide," he finally reminded her. "Welcome back."

This time her smile lingered a little longer. She pushed her hands into the pocket of the hoodie she wore. "Who told you I was here?"

"Hunter."

"Still his favorite, huh?" she teased.

"Eh." Seth shrugged. Hearing voices at the end of the corridor, he straightened, reaching for his phone so he could pretend to be in the middle a call if someone looked down.

She leaned forward slightly to peer around the taller crate beside her, then slipped back, patting the space next to her. "Come on, hide with me."

It was as though the past four months had been just one night. Shoving his phone into his pocket and climbed onto the crate next to her with a grunt, making sure to pull his feet out of view. "I feel like I'm playing hide-and-seek."

"Hopefully no one's seeking us," she whispered.

The voices faded and, aside from distant music playing and the clatter of equipment, they were left in relatively silence. He felt her sigh and let his head rest against the wall. "You okay?"

"Clean bill of health," she announced.

"Sadie," he sighed. "How—"

"I don't know how he is," she whispered.

"Drew? You haven't talked to him today?" he guessed. It would make sense. Between travel and sneaking in without being seen, not to mention managing to sneak around to meet with Hunter and Vince, he would be surprised if she'd had time to take a piss, much less call and check on her boyfriend. "You—"

"Yeah."

Her voice was flat. He tried to gauge her expression, but she still had the hood pulled over her head, blocking his view of her face. He could sense the storm of emotions, though, before her lips settled into a firm line. "I'm lost, Sadie Jo."

"It's nothing," she said briskly, pulling her phone from the pocket of the faded Demon Bálor hoodie she wore and checking the screen.

"You know, I wouldn't be so lost if you answered my calls once in a while," he muttered. Then, sighing, he slung his arm around her and drew her in. "But I understand why you didn't."

"I wasn't ready to talk to anyone." Her arm slipped around him and she squeezed when he did. "I even sent Hunter to voicemail."

"Ouch. And you still have a job?"

She chuckled. "Amazing, isn't it?"

"Guess you're still his favorite," he mocked.

"I missed you," she said after a moment.

He pressed his lips to the top of her head, smiling at the faint scent of fabric softener. "Missed you too."

He held her to him, sensing she needed the comfort of an unquestioning embrace. Even though he had questions. At least several dozen. Gently rubbing her shoulder, he frowned when he heard her give a sad sigh. "You wanna talk later?"

He had an inkling that she didn't. Not about what she had to know he wanted her to talk about. She was already beginning to nod, though. "Sure."

"Did you drive?" Frowning when she tensed, he grunted as she pulled away from him abruptly. "Sadie?"

She closed her eyes tightly and ducked her head. "I don't drive."

He almost asked why. Before he could form the question, though, he remembered, and pressed his lips together. His gaze dropped to her hands. The sleeves of the hoodie were pushed up and he could just see the faint scarring on the inside of her right wrist.

"I got an Uber from the airport."

"Okay. Hey," he said softly, drawing her into another hug. "It's okay."

"Is it?"

"It will be."

She exhaled sharply, tilting her head to look up at him. He suddenly noticed the fringe of bangs slanted across her forehead. "Yeah?"

"You can ride with me."

"Because that's such an upgrade from an Uber," she snorted.

It occurred to him that maybe she'd wanted to ride with someone else. Maybe she'd wanted to take another Uber. Maybe she'd already made plans. He nudged the hood back, wanting to see the change to her hair, and couldn't keep the surprise form registering on his face.

"They had to shave the side of my head for stitches," she murmured, self-consciously smoothing her hand over the short cut.

Seth inwardly winced in sympathy. She'd loved her hair. At least twice a week she mentioned having some treatment or other done to it to keep it thick and healthy and strong and soft. He could well remember it falling nearly to her waist in alluring waves. Now, though, it was shorn close on the sides, the top styled in a pixie cut, slightly longer in the front, where her bangs slanted over her forehead. "Where were the stitches?"

She pulled back the bangs and he saw a jagged scar just above her right eyebrow. It extended into her hair, and he traced the length with his fingers. "It was the GPS," she explained. "One of those ones that hangs on the windshield. Fifteen stitches. As soon as I got home from the hospital, I shaved the rest. And it was easy to take care of, with my arm in a cast and not being able to hold a brush and hair dryer at the same time—"

"It looks great," he promised. He hoped his voice sounded sincere. It was a shock, yes, but the shorter cut highlighted the features of her face. Funny, how he'd known her for over two years and had never noticed the slight cleft in her chin "It really does, Sadie."

"Thanks." She smoothed the bangs back into place to conceal the scar.

"And you'll ride with me?" he asked.

She gave a brief nod and pressed her face to his shoulder. "Okay."

He held her to him for a long while, finally sliding his feet off the crate and reaching with his other arm to give her a proper hug. Aware of her fingers curling in the front of his shirt, he continued to hold her, ignoring the buzzing of his phone when it began to vibrate.

"You should probably answer that," she mumbled, sniffling.

"In a minute." Fearing she was crying, he slid one hand up to cup the back of her head, sighing when she sniffled again. He murmured what he hoped were soothing words, questions doubling and tripling. And when she lifted her head, he quickly brushed a tear from her cheek. "Sadie… Is it that bad?"

"Worse," she admitted in a whisper.

"We'll talk later," he promised, kissing the top of her head one more time.

She nodded, drawing back slightly to fumble in her hoodie pockets. A slightly crumpled napkin appeared in her hand and she dabbed at her eyes. While she did so, Seth checked his phone and groaned.

"I gotta go. Need to film some backstage bits."

"Okay."

But he didn't move immediately. Instead, he drew her in for another hug, needing to know she would be okay before he left. When her sniffles faded, he pressed a kiss to the top of her head, then reluctantly released her and slid off the crate. "I'll find you later."

***

They hadn't forgotten her.

Seth knew she had worried about it. Even though they hadn't spoken while she'd been out, it was a common fear. Every night not in the ring was one more night that gave another wrestler the opportunity to shine. Every week at home was another week without your name mentioned. He knew because he'd witnessed so many others experience the same worries through his years in the business. Had experienced them himself. And when one avoided social media while they were out, as Sadie had, it was likely that interest in them would wane.

But the crowd hadn't forgotten her.

He knew her name had been in the dirt sheets in the past month. First when she had been spotted arriving at the Performance Center in Florida. The fans knew it was nearing time for her slated return. Signs with her name had been spotted in the crowds for two weeks. Not many, but enough to make it clear that some people wanted to see her return. And although there had been no further sightings, not even at a house show as was the norm, the rumors had swirled that her return was just around the corner.

At the first strains of her new entrance theme, the confusion was obvious. The lights in the arena dimmed, a lone spotlight shining on the stage as she stepped out. Seth could barely hear her theme over the reaction from the crowd. He couldn't help but smile as he watched her on the backstage monitor as she remained on the stage until the lights came back full force. He couldn't keep from appreciating the way the clothes she wore flattered her figure, either. He was used to her in jeans and a t-shirt, or sweats, or yoga pants. He'd never seen her in leggings, now he thought about it, and he decided she looked so much better in solid white than anyone he'd ever seen wear the color. Her white tank top was arranged so just a glimpse of skin showed at her abdomen, and he silently agreed with the men standing near him that she should wear leggings more often. The woman were oohing and ahhing over her new hair, and the guys were murmuring appreciatively over the rest of her.

She strode down the ramp with confidence, and she had made it three steps when Seth gathered that she was returning as a heel. It was in the way she held herself, the way she glanced to the fans on either side of the ramp. Her bubbly, girl-next-door persona of the past was gone. She had always bounded down the ramp, greeting fans with high fives and a sunny smile. When she reached the steps she paused, shoulders lifting and chest expanding as she breathed in deeply. Then, as the cheers continued, she skipped the steps and pulled herself onto the apron, circling the perimeter of the ring so she could demand a microphone. The fans still cheered, while Charlotte and Asuka, standing in the center of the ring, their confrontation interrupted, stared at her.

He watched while she finally stepped into the ring. While she stood, letting the crowd continue their happy reaction to her return. While she raised the microphone and announced, voice somehow sultry yet sweet at the same time, that she was back. He stayed to see what she said, and when she launched into a passionate speech about recovering from injuries and working her ass off to return in time for WrestleMania. And how she would be damned if she'd returned to sit backstage and watch Charlotte have another Mania moment. She had been on the cusp of winning the title hanging over Asuka's shoulder, and she refused to go to the back of the line and claw her way to the top again.

Seth knew what was coming. She would be given a match against Asuka, or Charlotte, or possibly a triple threat, and if she won, she would be added to the women's title match at Mania. A predictable outcome to her return. When the women began to bicker and argue he smiled again. The arguing dissolved into a brawl and, confident she had been given a match later in the night to prove her worthiness of being at Mania, he headed off to get ready for his match.

He had barely stepped into Gorilla when he heard the news. Sadie was having a gauntlet match the next week. She would face all the women on the Raw roster, with the possibility of surprises from NXT, ending with Charlotte. If she won, Charlotte would be giving up her spot at WrestleMania and stood in line to go for the title at the next pay-per-view. If she lost, she went back to the end of the proverbial line. Every one of the women he ran into while making his way to Gorilla was abuzz about the news. A women's gauntlet match was rare, and usually only involved a few competitors. Sadie's was practically historic. And there was already the whisper that it would be the main event of Raw.

He wanted to find her and discover for himself if she was up for the challenge. He didn't doubt her physically being ready. One had only to look at her in the skintight leggings and tank top to see she was in top physical condition. Her muscles were more defined. He made a mental note to ask about her workout while she was recovering.

But was she ready mentally?

It had been just over four months since she'd been in a ring. Four months out could do a lot to a person's psyche. He knew firsthand that the mental anguish over being sidelined was just as bad, if not worse, than the physical pain of injuries and recovery. When he had been out, he hadn't been able to even watch wrestling until the week before he'd returned. And Sadie, who'd he always thought of as more than obsessed with wrestling, had probably done the same.

He couldn't shake the ever-present worry over her. Even though she was back and obviously deemed ready to make her return, he knew something was wrong. The Sadie he knew was vibrant and cheerful and always looked for the silver lining. Sudden thunderstorm with torrential rain caused her to pull to the side of the highway to wait? Perfect opportunity to fine tune her driving playlist or play a round of twenty questions with whoever was riding with her. Flight delayed due to snow and stranded at the airport? Time to talk someone into a race around the terminal, or pull out one of the decks of cards she always carried with her for a game, or time to hit the airport giftshop and spend way too much money on a board game to pass the time. Even backstage while waiting around for her matches or promos or whatever, she always found something fun to do. Impromptu social media Q&A with her friends, or backstage crew, or even venue staff. Sneaking outside to greet fans. Yes, she did seek out somewhat quiet spots to center herself, but even then, she was happy.

That was it. Sadie was a happy person and now… Now she wasn't.

Bouncing in place to hype himself up for his entrance, he couldn't shake the feeling that she had left that wreck with more than her wrist broken.

***

As soon as she'd found her way to the locker room after her segment, Sadie had had the feeling the women had been talking about her. An eerie quiet had fallen when she'd entered, clutching the handle of her suitcase. It had lingered until she'd sat down on a bench and begun to untie her shoes. Then they had all begun to chatter in that way that made her know they'd been talking about her. Because all of a sudden everyone was chatting about eyeliner and 4th of July plans, even though the holiday was months away. When she'd slipped off her shoes, they'd all congregated around her with hugs, welcoming her back, asking how she was feeling, raving about her hair. She could tell by the looks they sent each other that they all wanted to ask that question but no one had the guts to voice it. She felt welcomed though, especially when Becky and Liv sat with her to discuss ideas for the gauntlet match the next week. After a few moments, the chatter was normal.

"You look so amazing with the short hair," Becky enthused, playfully tousling it after Sadie changed into jeans and a tank top. "I tried short hair ages ago but it makes my jaw look huge."

"Did Vince say anything about it?" Liv asked, crisscrossing her legs while beginning to braid her own hair.

"He said…" Sadie screwed up her face in thought as she recalled her meeting with Vince that afternoon. It had been the first time he'd laid eyes on her since the wreck, and after his warm hug and enthusiastic welcome back, he'd gruffly complained about her hair. "It's not a direct quote, but something like 'Goddammit, Sadie, why the hell didn't you tell anybody you kept it so short? Can't the hair and makeup girls do something with it? You fucking want it that way? Why? Long hair is better! Ah, fine, whatever, but I fucking hate it, goddammit!'"

Becky snorted on a laugh. "Not a direct quote?"

"You sound just like him," Liv laughed. "No one imitates him better than you, Sadie!"

"It's a gift," Sadie replied with a shrug, then glanced to Becky. "And it might be a direct quote. I'm sure there were a few more goddammits in there."

"I've never heard him say that," Liv announced, finishing her braid and taking the hair band Becky offered. "At least, not to me. I'm almost jealous."

"Just get Sadie to imitate him?" Becky suggested with a grin.

They all laughed, and Sadie glanced up from zipping her suitcase when she heard a knocking at the locker room's door. An instant later her phone chimed and she pulled it from her pocket to see Seth's text.

Ready to go whenever you are.

"I'm gone, y'all," she announced, smiling when she was dragged into a hug by Becky. "See you tomorrow."

"Breakfast," Becky insisted. "We need to catch up."

Sadie nodded as they parted, almost sighing with relief when she heard that Seth was at the door. She exchanged goodbyes and made promises to work out, have lunch, and chat with some of the girls the next day. Stepping out into the hall, she grunted when she nearly walked into Seth.

"C'mon," he murmured, reaching for her suitcase.

"Where's your stuff?"

"Already loaded." He walked beside her down the hallway, pulling her suitcase along behind him. "I pulled the car up to the door. There's a crowd around the lot."

"There's always a crowd," she couldn't help but point out.

"It's different this time," he muttered.

She shrugged, not wanting to get into a discussion about how the crowd was different. She wouldn't have to face the fans tonight. She would be able to put it off for a little longer. She hadn't had the nerve to check her social media after her segment. She didn't want to read what they thought of her, bouncing back as though nothing were wrong after months of complete silence on all fronts. A stupid thing to do, she supposed, steps slowing when she saw Stephanie and Hunter. She should have posted something. Discussed her recovery. Discussed her worries. Kept it purely kayfabe and assured everyone that she would be back to take her rightful place. But she'd been scared. She still was. Because she knew what the replies and comments would be.

How's Drew? Is he okay? What happened?

Sadie looked up when a gentle hand landed on her shoulder. Looking up at Stephanie, she drew in a deep breath when she tilted her head to one side and stepped away from Hunter and Seth. She followed because it was Stephanie, and moistened her lips, unsure what to expect.

"Are you sure you're ready for this?" Stephanie asked softly.

Sadie blinked. Not quite what she had begun to thought the woman would say. Puzzled, she blurted, "Huh?"

"This." Stephanie gestured to the backstage area. Not as wild as it was during a show, but still busy. Crewmen loading equipment. Production staff darting around. Wrestlers chatting and laughing as they hung around.

It was an atmosphere she had craved during her long months out. One she prayed she would be able to get used to now she was back. Sadie glanced around, smiling faintly when Dolph waved at her. She returned the wave before focusing on Stephanie. "I kind of have to be."

"Yes," Stephanie allowed. "The storyline is set. But… You could have stayed out longer if you needed."

"I couldn't. I can only work out so much. I can only clean so often. I can only watch so much Tv." She fought the urge to cross her arms and settled for pushing her hands into the pockets of her hoodie. "This is my life, Stephanie."

"I know, honey." Stephanie's voice was warm with understanding. She glanced behind Sadie, who turned to see Seth and Hunter watching them.

Her stomach twisted when she saw the worry on the men's faces. "I had to come back," she said after turning back. "It's where my friends are. My family."

"No one knows about you and Drew," Stephanie said softly. "Hunter and I didn't even tell Dad. It's up to you when to let people know."

"It's none of their business," Sadie muttered with bitterness. It was one thing she couldn't get used to after becoming somewhat of a public figure. It was bizarre, people wanting to know everything about her life. The questions about her childhood and her food preferences. The overt questions about her relationships. And the internet's uncanny ability to determine she was sleeping with or dating someone just because they'd been spotted together.

"Everyone will find out eventually." Stephanie sighed. "Have you talked to him? At all?"

Sadie shook her head. "Not since…"

Not since the night she'd called Stephanie, sobbing. Not since she'd what she'd thought was real had shattered like an interrupted dream. Not since she'd sat in her car, unable to even get into the driver's seat, and watched Sheamus drive up to be with Drew. Not since she'd been unable to answer the Irishman's questions before he finally went inside. Not since she'd finally called a taxi and texted him that last time.

I'll get my things tomorrow while you're at the doctor. I'll leave my key.

Fifteen months reduced to impersonal words. She might have been the cleaner that came in once a week.

"Oh, Sadie." Stephanie pulled her into a hug. "Are you still at the extended stay?"

She nodded, biting back the urge to cry. "I'm moving into my new apartment this week."

"If something comes up, promise you'll take mine and Hunter's condo."

"You mean y'all's Florida sex dungeon?" Sadie shuddered dramatically. "Gross."

"We don't have sex in the guest room…"

"Yeah, but I wouldn't be able to fix my morning coffee without picturing what pornographic things y'all have done on the kitchen counter." She narrowed her eyes slightly when Stephanie grinned. "You totally had sex in the guest room, didn't you?"

Stephanie smiled sweetly.

"Disgusting."

"Anyway." Stephanie cleared her throat and straightened her shoulders. "At least promise you'll think about it."

"I'll think about it," Sadie intoned robotically.

"Will you at least come up for a visit soon? Dad's worried about you. He doesn't like that you've kept yourself shut off all this time."

Sadie's stomach twisted. "I know he is. But—"

"And the girls think you don't like them anymore."

Gutted with guilt, Sadie blinked rapidly to keep from tearing up. True, she hadn't made her usual trips to Connecticut to visit Stephanie, Hunter, and their daughters. But she had called often. There had been FaceTime sessions and countless texts. "You know I love them more than anything."

"I know, but they're kids. When they find out you were here tonight…" Stephanie winced.

"Ugh." Sadie could only imagine the scene. "Of course I'll come up for a visit. But you're not playing fair."

"Have I ever?"

"I have it on good authority that you were a sweet, loving child." Sadie pursed her lips. "Of course, that good authority was Shane…"

"Call me in the morning, okay? I'll get your flight arranged. You can stay with us."

"I will." As though she'd stay anywhere else when she was in Connecticut.

"I love you," Stephanie murmured, drawing her into another hug. This one was longer, tighter, and ended with a sigh. "Be safe."

"Love you, too," Sadie promised. Turning, she grunted when she nearly walked into Hunter. "See you later, H."

He placed a hand on her shoulder before she could slip away. "Is she coming up for a visit?"

"Next week," Stephanie announced.

"You guilted her with the girls, didn't you?"

"It worked, didn't it?"

"We can bring the kids to the house shows this weekend."

"They'd like that."

"She would too. Did she promise she's coming up?"

"She didn't have to."

"She's right here," Sadie blurted, scowling at the couple. "I hate when y'all do that."

Hunter chuckled and lightly tousled her hair before pulling her into a one-armed hug. "Go on, get out of here. Seth's waiting."

"Night, guys," she said, slipping away and rejoining Seth. "Sorry, Steph had to play mother hen."

Seth merely nodded and they continued walking to the exit. When they reached the door, he placed a gentle hand on her back. "Let's go."

The car was barely five steps from the door. Sadie could hear the fans, and when she stepped out into the pool of light just outside the door she held her breath, expecting to be spotted. But the car shielded her from their view and she climbed in with a sigh of relief. The windows were down and she knew from the cheers when Seth had been seen. She heard the trunk open and then close with a thump. She was buckling her seatbelt when he opened the drivers' door and got behind the wheel. The car was already running, cool air blasting from the vents, and she opened her mouth to speak when the GPS suddenly shrieked that they needed to drive the highlighted route.

And, for some reason, it made her laugh.

***

Sadie was surprised that Seth didn't turn on the music one they were on the highway. But, she reflected, picking through the bag of snacks she'd bought at the gas station to find her Cheetos, he wanted her to talk. That was the whole reason she was with him. Well, no, she was with him because they were friends. Kind of? Maybe? She didn't know if she could still call herself his friend after practically ignoring his existence for months. Sitting back with the bag in hand, she adjusted her seatbelt before opening the bag. She savored the aroma and was reaching for one when Seth's hand dove in. Gasping when he brought out a handful, she glared at him. "Seth!"

"What?" he asked, tone oozing with innocence. "We agreed to share the snacks."

"Doesn't mean you can take half the fucking bag at once, goddammit," she grumbled.

"I didn't take half the fucking bag at once." Although his words were garbled, mouth crammed full of Cheetos as it was, she understood him perfectly.

"A third of the bag, then." She popped one into her mouth and chewed thoughtfully, watching him struggle to get the rest from his hand into his mouth. Able to see several fall, she giggled when he cursed and began wiping his fingers on his jeans. "Serves you right."

"It's nice to hear you laughing again," he said after a moment.

Levity fading, she focused on chewing another Cheeto. "It hasn't been that long."

"Has been for me," he pointed out.

"I'm sorry I never called you back." He'd called at least two dozen times that first week after she'd been released from the hospital. And left half that many voicemails. Twice as many texts. Asking how she was. If she needed anything. Why she wasn't at home. Over the weeks the frequency had waned, ending with one text that had left her sobbing into her pillow and cursing her inability to talk to anyone connected with work.

When you're ready to talk to me, I'm here.

After that, he'd texted her sporadically. No questions. Just pictures of stupid signs in public places with horrible grammar or spelling. Pictures of his new puppy, Twisty. Then, the day after she'd gone to the Performance Center to begin training for her return, two words that had once again left her crying.

Miss you.

His hand came over, but instead of reaching for more Cheetos, he plucked the bag from her hand and laid it on the center console before taking her hand in his. Giving a gentle squeeze, he sighed. "Sadie…"

"You can start asking all those questions you have now," she said, looking down at their joined hands.

"Are you and Drew okay?"

She sucked in a breath. "We're not together anymore."

"What happened?"

"I don't—" Sadie cut off with a sigh. "Okay, I do know. Nothing was the same."

Seth gave her hand another squeeze.

"I didn't expect it to be. He was severely injured…" She closed her eyes briefly. "He had so many surgeries. I knew things would be different. But even before he came home… He didn't want to see me. At first I thought it was because he didn't want me to see him looking as he did, but…"

"But?" Seth prompted gently.

"I figured out that he was still mad at me."

"Still?"

"We were fighting that night."

"At the hospital?"

"The night of the wreck," she whispered.

"Fuck. I'm sorry."

"He wanted me to go Scotland with him for Christmas. I'd already made plans with my stepdad," she explained, allowing herself a moment of something akin to happiness at the thought of her stepfather. One of only a handful of people she'd kept in contact with while she was out of work. "He was… I don't know. It was my fault. I could have come up with a compromise. I see Arthur a lot. I'd only met his family twice, and only once since we'd begun dating. But I was being stubborn and I let the argument keep going. It got petty."

Seth's sigh was one of understanding.

"We both started criticizing things about each other." She swallowed anxiously, remembering words flung with venom. Petty words that had turned vicious. And when the argument had reached its peak, words that had changed everything. Inhaling slowly, she moistened her lips. "I didn't see the red light until it was too late. I was so angry and upset. We were yelling, and it was snowing hard, and when I tried to brake, I skidded. Then I felt something hit the back of the car and the car began to spin…"

Spinning. Screaming. A deafening crash that had echoed like a gunshot inside the car. The sickening crunch of metal. The airbag against her face as glass sprayed. The taste of blood.

The sight of her boyfriend, body twisted and bleeding. Silent. His hand reaching toward her.

"Sadie."

She jerked her head up. The car had stopped. Above the blood rushing in her ears she could hear the clicking of the hazard lights. She could feel his hand still clasping hers, their fingers twined, and slowly looked down to see she was clutching him so tightly her knuckles were white. "The policeman that responded asked if I was having trouble seeing because of the snow. They found spots of black ice near where I hit the brakes, and they chalked it up to the snow and the ice. I didn't tell them otherwise."

"Sadie, it wasn't—"

"It was my fault," she insisted. "I know it was. If I'd been paying attention—"

"You still could have hit that patch of ice and skidded across the intersection. You don't know that you'd have missed it."

"If it wasn't my fault, why do I feel so guilty?" she asked, hating the weakness in her voice.

"Because it was a horrible accident." He sighed. "And because, even though you were arguing when it happened, someone you love was hurt."

"He wasn't just hurt. Half his body was broken," she whispered. "Why, Seth? Why did his side of the car have to be the one that slammed into the light pole? Why did he have to be the one whose body was destroyed?"

"Would you prefer it had been someone else?"

"I wish it had been me."

"No. You don't."

"Yes, I fucking do! If it had been me, maybe I'd have—"

"Don't you dare fucking say it," he warned.

She reared back. "Seth—"

"You can't let the guilt eat at you. You can't," he stressed when she opened her mouth to argue. "The guilt is worse than the injuries you had. It's letting you not be happy that you survived. You both survived. Yes, half his body was broken. All the injuries he had are horrible. But he survived. That's the important thing. It doesn't matter if you were paying attention or if he had been driving or if you hadn't been arguing. It still could have happened. It could have been so much fucking worse than it was. That's why it's called an accident. Because it's horrific and it doesn't make sense. Beating yourself up isn't going to change the fact that it happened. Remember Finn's injury at SummerSlam?"

Surprised by the sudden question, she could only nod. She had been in NXT at the time, but she'd been backstage and had seen the immediate aftermath. The shock. The horror. The realization that the injury was bad. And she had seen the grief and remorse on Seth's face when he'd come, wide-eyed and pale, backstage. "That's different."

"No it's not."

"Yes it is," she insisted. "We all know when we step into the ring that an injury can happen. No matter how careful we are."

"That's exactly my point. We all know it can happen. Just like we all know that when we get into a car and go for a drive that a wreck can happen. A plan we board could crash." He leaned forward, giving her hand a gentle tug so she would look at him. "You think I didn't beat myself up over it? You think I didn't sit up every night for weeks going over that moment again and again, telling myself what I could have done differently? I fucking stopped his career right when he was being pushed to the fucking moon."

"It's different," she insisted. "Because he didn't blame you. Did he?"

"No, he didn't," Seth sighed. "But that didn't make it any easier."

"Drew blamed me." She felt Seth's hand tighten. Could feel the tension creep up his arm and through his body. She saw his jaw clench before he pressed his lips into a tight line.

"What?"

"He blamed me. He still does." She ducked her head, hoping to shield her sudden, hot tears from his gaze. "That's why we broke up."

"He blames you for the wreck?"

"He'd just been released from the hospital. He was in pain. So much pain. I did my best. I was mostly healed up by then. I did everything I could think of to make him comfortable. I was just so happy that he was gonna be okay, you know? I knew it would take a long time for him to heal but I knew that he could do it. And I was prepared to stay by his side. I was ready to take him to all his appointments and make sure he did his PT. I memorized the doctors' instructions about rest and hydration. How to clean his stitches. I asked a nurse at the hospital to show me how to help him bathe because he couldn't stand up to take a shower. And he refused to hire a nurse to come to the house to do it for him." She inhaled sharply, using her free hand to dash away the tears before they could fall. "The first few days people were in and out. Then suddenly it was just the two of us and I realized…"

"Realized what?" Seth whispered.

"That I wasn't wanted. He was so angry. I expected that. I've seen enough people recovering from injuries to know all the stages. But… The anger didn't go away. I know it takes time, and that's one reason I delayed my return. I didn't want to leave him while he was still so mad. And he was depressed. He didn't want to talk. Didn't want visitors. Then one day Hunter dropped by, and…" She groaned, recalling Hunter's weary expression when he'd come out of the bedroom after speaking to Drew. "Afterward, we got into a huge fight. He kept telling me to go back to work, that he didn't need me hanging over him. I was getting on his nerves. He could manage without me. I got mad and told him he could barely wipe his own ass without help, and that just made it worse."

Seth gave her hand a gentle squeeze. And waited.

"I know now that I should have walked away and given us both time to cool off. But I was so mad, because I was there to help him and he didn't want me. It got so bad, Seth."

"How bad did it get?" he whispered.

"Things were thrown," she admitted. Then, feeling him tense up, she hastened to explain. "Not at each other. He didn't hurt me."

At least, not physically. But the glass shattering against the wall had mirrored the splintering of her heart.

"Then he told me to fucking get out and never come back, that me babying him wouldn't make up for the wreck. Something snapped inside me and I left."

"To give him time to cool down?"

She shook her head. "For good. I went back the next day when he was at the doctor and got my stuff. I deleted his number from my phone before I left the house. I left my key. I-I left the ring he'd given me."

"Ring?"

"He proposed the day before the wreck." She squeezed her eyes shut, trying to force the memory away. But it reared above her attempts and filled her mind. She remembered the happiness she'd felt that day, even before his proposal. Laughter as they worked together in the kitchen, music blasting. Stopping to dance when their song had begun to play. The smell of paint as they finished their project. Turning from washing her hands to find him dropping to one knee. His voice, accent thicker than she could ever remember hearing it before. The words of Robert Burns.

"'Till a' the seas gang dry, my Dear, / And the rocks melt wi' the sun: / I will love thee still, my dear, / While the sands o' life shall run.'"

The brilliant diamond glinting when he slid the ring onto her finger had paled in comparison to the glittering in his eyes. The taste of tears and the sound of joyous laughter and the knowledge that she had found her forever.

She had worn the ring for less than twenty-four hours. Had slipped it into her pocket when they reached the venue for the house show, because they didn't want to announce it so soon. It was their little secret. They'd tell the world of their engagement after the New Year. But the girls had known something was up. She was giddy and glowing, and tentative plans had begun to form in her mind. Of an intimate wedding in his beloved Scotland, of dresses and flowers and cake and forever…

Plans that had disappeared when the rental car had spun out of control.

She hadn't touched the ring again until the morning she'd returned to the house to get her things. She had thought of leaving him a note but hadn't had any idea of what to write. Instead she had left her key and the ring on his nightstand, where he would be sure to find it when he returned from the doctor. And she had left, slamming the door on what was supposed to be her happily ever after.

"Can we go?" she whispered, using the sleeve of her hoodie to wipe her tears away.

Seth gave her hand a heartfelt squeeze. "Yeah, we can."

#seth rollins imagine #wwe imagine #holy shit it's been so long #multipart:scars #k thx bye #my fics

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