#I am not passive anymore - and surprise! that doesn't make me a horrible or evil person.

[yuckydraws]

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Healing & Growth

(gif made by my friend @robanilla-arts is below - slight warning for flashing! Thanks again, Rob!)

#if you feel like reading it - I'm gonna ramble in the tags. #Don't really feel like having it attached to the post for forever... cause what if i just wanna reblog some fairysona art?? #anyways #this year sucked a lot. in a lot of ways. but im grateful for it. #healing is stupidly hard and annoyingly enough? not linear in the slightest. Yet infuriatingly - it is worth it. #I am far from done with healing. I've barely scratched the surface. #but im learning and connecting with myself along the way. #The biggest step I've taken this year is working on my people pleasing ways. it's a bad habit birthed from a lot of different traumas. #but it no longer rules my life. #I am not passive anymore - and surprise! that doesn't make me a horrible or evil person. #my kindness is no longer a weakness. its still a part of me and always will be. i won't let go of it. #but it is no longer to a fault #there are people undeserving of my kindness... i realize that now. I know what i will and will not put up with in every kind of relationshi #im still learning and exploring - and i've said a lot of goodbyes this year. I'm sure i will say more. #but that's okay. #some relationships are forever - some serve you for a while and teach you a lesson when they end. #and some relationships stick around and don't *have* to have a deeper connection #and that's also okay. #I didn't think I'd make it through this year in all honesty. I was very close to ending it all on multiple occasions. #But. for what it's worth - as of now im glad im here. #i will continue to struggle and have my hard times. im not naive enough to think depression just goes away. #but im okay for now and im moving forward. #there will be pauses and abrupt stops and likely some good ol' rotting involved. but when i can - ill be moving forward. #i will not speak a word of 2024 because no matter what it will have it's ups and downs. #but i will continue to keep working on myself. and that's all anyone can do in this weird life. #if you made it through all of that... uhhhh wow you got a crush on me or smth? /j/j/j/j #but fr - if you read this far... thank you. i hope you're faring well and that you have a happy celebration tonight. #sleep well and dream well when it comes to you #yucky draws #my art