#Hobi has the best ideas this is meaningful too in its own way~

[94erz]

Masked pony Mang will always have special place in my heart though...

#Sab talks BTS stuff #I LOVE THEM BOTH #EQUALLY #they're one in the same I know but horse Mang was meaningful when Hobi designed them originally #Mang was designed with the idea of breaking stereotypes for horse characters and they did such a good job :( #Hobi has the best ideas this is meaningful too in its own way~

[thenewgothicromance]

“Craved it constantly”

So I know we’ve all talked a lot about drugs as a symbols in The Goldfinch but I want to talk a little bit more how heroin is specifically used throughout the book to symbolize love and sexuality.

Heroin is only mentioned a handful of times in the book, but each mention has its own interesting and meaningful implications. I think I’ve picked them all out here.

1. The first mention of heroin is on page 445, when Theo tells us that he only does it on offer, saying, “As much as I loved it, and craved it constantly, I never bought it. There would never be a reason to stop.”

On first mention, Theo identifies heroin as something he badly wants, but denies himself. And something that he knows, if he allowed himself, he could never escape. Already very loaded.

2. The next time heroin is mentioned, it’s when he’s confronting Kitsey about cheating on his with Tom. In this conversation Kitsey first, of course, tells him, “I don’t expect you to understand but it’s rough being in love with the wrong person.”

To which Theo’s narration tells us, “But who better knew the truth of what she was saying than me?”

Theo of course means, and wants us to believe, that the “wrong person,” he is in love with is Pippa. But we know (Theo tells us explicitly later on) that he isn’t really in love with Pippa at all - he’s simply attached to the idea of her, in his grief over losing his mother and her periphery to it.

So what, then, would it really mean, for Theo to know better than anyone that it’s rough to be in love with the wrong person?

Before we can ponder that too long, Kitsey gives us another line to chew on.

“I know all about your things, and I don’t care.”

To which Theo says, “Things?” (italics from the original text).

Kitsey then only mentions one thing, despite it having been brought to our attention that she knows of, plural, things.

First she says Theo has “straightened up” since they’ve been together, to which Theo asks, “What’s that supposed to mean?”

We haven’t even gotten to the heroin yet and this conversation is loaded with queer subtext. She knows about his secrets, being with her has “straightened” him up–but then she tells him, “Tessa told Em she stopped seeing you after she caught you snorting heroin at her kitchen table.”

Theo quickly denies that it was heroin, but the message is clear. Not only is heroin something Theo craves yet denies himself, but it’s now identified as something he denies in front of others, and something that would make a girl stop seeing him when he was “caught” with it. Not only are these things established, but they are explicitly applied to heroin over other drugs - Theo mentions that Tessa, for whom heroin was a dealbreaker, did “blow” (a sexually loaded term in itself), letting us know the drug being discussed is not coincidental.

3. Heroin next comes up when they are in Amsterdam discussing Sascha, and Gyuri says, “Sascha shoots heroin the way that you and I breathe.”

We don’t ever learn much about Sascha, beyond his involvement in art theft, but we DO learn that he’s gay.

Boris says, of the boy that gets away with the painting after they are held up, “…that was Sascha’s boyfriend!”

4. After they lose the painting and Boris drives Theo back to his hotel, he gives Theo a little bag of unnamed drugs. This is the when heroin begins to be associated with Boris exclusively. Not only has heroin thus far appeared in ways that seem to symbolized repressed desire, but for the rest of the novel we will be often reminded that this is relevant concerning Boris in particular.

Later, in hotel room, Theo tells us it’s heroin in the bag, and that there is a “rainbow skull” printed on the side. Enough said.

5. Heroin is mentioned, along with cocaine, as one of the words Theo searches for in a newspaper when he is looking for news of Boris.

6. It is, then, Boris’ heroin that Theo uses in his suicide attempt. There are a few ways to look at this.

Theo views his suicide as being euthanized. In his letter to Hobie he compares himself to a “sick puppy” he and his mother once found on the street that had to be put down. His secrets, his things are getting the best of him. He is succumbing to his secrets metaphorically, but literally, he is succumbing to the heroin. They are one of the same. The drugs, we know are not his secret. So what is? We’ll get back to that.

The other way to look at it is, particularly since Theo is not successful in his attempt, a rebirth. Theo is “dying” in order to be born again, into a new world in which he will soon learn that he is free of his biggest secret: the painting.

Because the painting is, of course, Theo’s biggest secret.

But the painting itself is a symbol. It’s a symbol for many things throughout the book - for Theo’s mother, for his younger and more innocent self, for the core of himself and his desires - but overall, as is made clear at the end of the book, it is a symbol of love. Theo tells us that love has followed the painting, “down through time,” that he himself is immortal in his love for it. Theo’s secret is the painting, and the painting is love, which makes Theo’s secret, at the end of the day, love. And it is this secret, this love, that he is being subsumed by, as he takes the heroin.

Love for whom, again? Whose heroin is it, that he’s taking?

7. Our last mention of heroin is, of course, by Boris, as he shoots up in Antwerp. This scene - the final scene in the book - is loaded with coded imagery (don’t even get me started on the moon business) but their actions and conversations are centered around this action, and their conversation about it. The themes and phrasing perfectly mirror the first ever mention we got of heroin.

Boris says of heroin that “On [his] deathbed [he] will crave it,” just as Theo said he “…loved it, and craved it constantly.”

Theo asks him if he’s thought of quitting, and Boris says, “Why should I?” just as Theo said, “There would never be a reason to stop.”

Their desire is mutual. And it is, in fact, this conversation that prompts Theo to the revelation that, “we can’t escape who we are,” (and notably compares resisting that to his father trying to have a wife and child).

The map through these seven mentions looks like this

A nearly irresistible but denied desire —> a desire that is secret, not “straight,” and unsuitable for a relationship with a woman —> specifically the desire of a man who loves other men —> a desire that Boris grants Theo —> a desire specifically associated with Boris —> a desire to, at the end of the day, be consumed by love —> a desire that Theo and Boris share, and cannot escape.

#the goldfinch #theo decker #boris pavlikovsky #fam this got WAY longer than i intended i'm ngl apparently i got a LOT of thoughts on this ok #and dare i say it.......more to come LOL #i love having time to do stuff like this again #meta

[jwminssi]

chasing starlight {jikook | T | part two}

It's the middle of the night when an explosion on his backyard turns Jungkook's life upside down. Through a mess of fallen stars, witches and the secrets his parents are keeping from him, Jungkook will have to make sure he's selfless enough to make the right choice and ignore the way his heart beats faster for the boy that fell from the sky.

read on ao3

When Jungkook wakes up, his arms are full of Jimin. He’s wrapped around him and holding tightly onto his shirt, hair tickling his chin and soft smell clouding his senses. It’s adorable and heart-wrenching at the same time.

Jungkook tries to free himself in order to get up but Jimin is holding him tightly even in his sleep. He sighs as he changes his position slightly, one hand on the star’s wrist to hopefully pry it off of him but Jimin only tightens his grip.

“Stop moving.” He mumbles against Jungkook’s chest and the boy freezes. “Let me sleep.”

Jungkook doesn’t say anything, only hopes Jimin can’t hear how fast his heart is beating and looks over at the clock on his bedside table.

10:13 a.m.

“We should get up.” Jungkook says and he swears he can hear Jimin whine. “We need to check out that address mom gave us.”

Jimin groans and gets up. “Fine.” He says and heads out to the bathroom, incredibly moody and not even sparing the boy on the bed a glance.

Jungkook misses his warmth as soon as he’s gone. He lies there staring at his ceiling as a million thoughts cross his mind. Of course he would love to stay in bed with Jimin all day, cuddling him and threading his fingers through his soft blond hair, but he can’t indulge in that when he knows the other will leave so soon.

Maybe he’s being stupid for not enjoying his opportunities while he can, but Jungkook likes to think he’s just saving himself from bigger suffering later on.

Jimin complains about having to get up and out of Jungkook’s arms – yes, he actually mentions that – a handful of times before his mood starts to improve. It’s only when they’re already on their way out that he smiles at something Jungkook said and goes back to behaving like the sunshine he really is.

The address turns out to be a small magic shop downtown and both of them eye it curiously,  gaze going over the glass walls filled with toys, cards and magician accessories before glancing at each other and going in.

Jungkook pushes the wooden door carefully and they hear the bell above it go off, signaling that a new client arrived. There’s no one around, though, but they spot a black cat sitting on the far end of the counter watching them intently, almost as if studying – and judging – them silently.

“Hey, welcome to the magic shop!” They hear the voice before they can see who it belongs to, only getting a face to match to it when a red haired man emerges from behind the front counter. “I’m Hoseok, how can I help you?”

“Uh, we… we got the information that you might help us with something that fell from the sky recently.” Jungkook says, not wanting to put his mother’s name out there or to go straight to the point in case this guy has no clue what he’s talking about.

Hoseok stops and glances over at his cat. Jungkook thinks he’s seeing things but it definitely seemed like they exchanged a meaningful look. “Oh, are you also looking for the star?”

Jungkook’s eyes widen and his next words come out on before his brain can filter them. “There’s others looking for him?”

“Everyone is looking for…” Hoseok goes silent, realizing what the other said. “Him? How do you know it’s a him?” He raises an eyebrow.

“I don’t.” Jungkook is quick to answer.

Hoseok smiles. The cat meows as it walks closer to its owner and plops down next to his arm.

“Then why did you say it like that, kid?” Hoseok asks, hand supporting his chin as his smile turns amused.

“Impulse.”

“Interesting.” Hoseok says looking straight into Jungkook’s eyes, as if searching for something. Jungkook is frozen in place, apprehension taking over him as he thinks about what could possibly happen to the two of them in there. Jimin’s eyes are on him, he can tell, but he doesn’t know if it’s a smart move to tell him to run or not. “What do you think, Yoongi?” Hoseok asks the cat as he scratches behind his ears. “Is he the star?”

Jungkook and Jimin watch in complete shock as the cat transforms in front of their eyes, leaving now a naked man sitting on the counter, the pink collar still in place around his neck the only thing reminiscent of his previous form. Jungkook takes a step back and Jimin comes closer, standing behind him as he watches the two strangers carefully to try guessing their next move.

“Hmm...” Yoongi gets down from the balcony, completely shameless as to his lack of clothes, and approaches the two. “Not this kid.” He says, his slurred voice complementing perfectly his sharp but droopy eyes. “There’s something about him, though...” Jungkook’s breath hitches when Yoongi walks right into his personal space to study him.

“I saw it, too.” Hoseok agrees, looking amused from behind the counter as Jimin and Jungkook are trapped under Yoongi’s scrutiny.

“But this one... definitely not human.” Yoongi targets Jimin next, bringing a hand up to touch the soft skin of his cheek. Jungkook would have batted his hand away if he wasn’t so terrified of getting killed right then; he has no idea what’s going on, but it’s better not to make any harsh moves. “Are you the star, pretty thing?”

“Y-Yes.” Jimin stutters and Jungkook looks at him, silently scolding him at the shared information. He didn’t feel safe before and he feels even less now that they know Jimin is the star.

Yoongi merely smiles and stares at him a bit longer, his hard eyes traveling down Jimin’s body. “He has the necklace, too.”

“Oh?” Hoseok perks up at that. “I hadn’t noticed.”

“What are the odds?” Yoongi mutters, gaze fixated on the jewelry adorning Jimin’s neck. “And yet, they’re clueless.”

“Clueless about what?” Jungkook asks, done with all the mystery that seems to be surrounding Jimin and everything related to him.

Hoseok actually looks like he’s about to answer before he’s interrupted by a thunder so loud that it makes the windows rattle. The lights in the shop flicker just after that and everyone stands alert.

“Yoongi, get back here.” Hoseok says slowly and Yoongi obeys, transforming back into the black cat they first saw and jumping on the counter. “You two, step away from the front door.”

Jungkook thinks he would rather do the opposite and just leave but Jimin pulls him further into the shop and partially hidden from whoever comes in. He’s terrified, that’s clear as day, so Jungkook knows he has to be the one making the decisions or they will both end up dead. Looking around, he finds a back door but before he can grab Jimin and make a run for it, another thunder rolls around and someone enters the shop, forcing them to get down when Hoseok throws them a warning look.

“Long time, no see, right Hobi?” An unfamiliar female voice says and the way it rings in Jungkook’s ears makes him shiver.

“That’s Hoseok for you, Joohyun.” Hoseok says, clearly uncomfortable by her presence. There’s the sound of heels walking on wood and when she speaks again, it’s more distant.

“Still playing hard to get, I see...” A pause. “Yoongi.” She greets, distaste clear in her voice, and the cat hisses at her before jumping to the floor, the sound of his paws against the hardwood getting closer and closer until he’s sitting down right next to Jungkook. Yoongi makes a movement with his head in the direction of the voices before he gracefully climbs on Jimin’s lap; Jungkook realizes he’s telling him to listen.

“What can I do for you?” Hoseok asks in the same professional way he asked them when they first entered his shop.

“I want to know if you’ve heard the rumors...”

“What rumors?”

“About the star...” She’s walking around again and Jungkook can actually see her once when she gets a bit too close.

“Yeah, I did hear about that.” Hoseok starts and Jungkook turns to Yoongi with a frown, but the cat only gives him a look that’s way too human to be coming from him; Jungkook stays quiet. “Don’t know where it fell, though.”

“Do you really not know?” She insists. “Or do you just not want to tell me because you’re also looking for it?”

“I don’t need it, Joohyun. You know I don’t share your methods of longevity.”

“Right...” She sighs and it’s awfully close to them now. “You’re one of the good guys.” Joohyun laughs, another thunder making the shop shake, and Jimin whimpers in fear. From the corner of his eyes, Jungkook sees Yoongi rubbing his face against Jimin’s neck to soothe him. “What about the necklace?”

Hoseok hums. “I don’t think I heard anything about a necklace.”

“And you expect me to believe that?” She snickers. “It’s okay, I get that you might want to keep it for yourself… Who doesn’t want immortality when it comes that easily, am I right?” Jungkook frowns, wondering if she really means Jimin’s necklace or if she’s talking about something else entirely.

“Still don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“You know, Hobi, I’ve always liked you despite you being part of the boring side of the family.” Joohyun sighs. “So I’m gonna let you- What was that?” She’s interrupted by Jimin sneezing loudly enough for her to hear.

Jungkook looks at him and he’s sure there’s panic in his eyes because Jimin’s own start to fill with tears at the realization that they might get caught by someone who doesn’t have the best intentions.

“What?” Hoseok tries to play it cool but there’s an edge to his voice, too.

Yoongi jumps away from Jimin and transforms into human again, pointing at the back door and whispering a soft ‘go’ to them before making his way to the front of the shop, again without a single care as to the fact that he’s naked.

Jungkook doesn’t wait to hear what Yoongi is going to say as a distraction before he’s grabbing Jimin’s hand and hurrying towards the door as quietly as they can. When outside, Jungkook doesn’t let go and pulls Jimin with him, running as fast as their legs allow them, until they’re about five blocks away and his lungs can’t take it anymore.

“I’m sorry.” Jimin mutters, chest heaving from the exercise, and he’s threatening to start crying for real this time.

“It’s okay, we’re out of there, we’re fine.” Jungkook tries to tranquilize him but his heart is still beating way too fast for him to even think straight. “What the fuck happened in that shop anyway?”

Jimin only shakes his head and only then does Jungkook notice they’re still holding hands. It’s a nice comfort but he doesn’t know if he should be doing that so he lets go, seeing the way Jimin frowns right away.

“Come on, let’s go home.” Jungkook says and starts walking before he can do anything that will make things even worse. He stops, though, when he realizes Jimin isn’t following him. “You coming?”

Jimin nods and runs to catch up with him, but he wraps himself around Jungkook’s arm and holds his hand again. “Please, don’t let go.”

Sooyoung is waiting for them at home when they arrive and she can tell something is wrong because she’s on them as soon as they close the front door.

“What happened?” She asks. Jungkook just shakes his head and leads a still scared Jimin to the couch.

“I have no idea.” He answers with a sigh. “Someone showed up, a woman… We hid and the two guys helped us escape.”

“They’re good people.” Sooyoung nods. She eyes Jimin worriedly and Jungkook goes to sit next to him, making the star immediately reach for his touch of comfort.

“That woman wasn’t.” Jungkook says, brain working hard to try figuring out what he’s supposed to do now. “She was looking for Jimin, mom… I don’t want to know what she was planning on doing to him.”

“It’s better if you don’t know.” Sooyoung runs a hand down her face.

“She’s a witch, right?” Jimin asks. That’s the first time he speaks since their arrive and his voice is oddly cold. He looks at Sooyoung when there’s no answer and she only nods at him. Jimin sighs, apparently deep in thought if the crease between his eyebrows is anything to go by.

Jungkook watches him, intrigued by this serious and focused side of him that he hadn’t seen yet. Jimin seems to be thinking hard, making decisions or formulating a whole plan inside his head and the only thing that gives him away are his eyes, that hold a certain amount of sadness in them.

“Jimin?” Jungkook calls.

“I think we need to track down my brother.” He finally says after a beat.

“The one that fell?” Jungkook asks and Jimin agrees.

“A fallen star?” Sooyoung questions. “Is Seokjin your brother?”

Jimin’s face lights up for a split second. “Do you know how I can reach him?”

“I don’t know him personally, but everyone in the area knows who he is.” Sooyoung says. Jungkook figures that by “in the area” she means everyone that’s aware of the existence of this other world inside the human realm.

“What do you mean?” Jimin frowns at her comment.

“He’s your brother, you should know how powerful he is.” She starts and Jimin nods. “Honestly, he should be dead by now, but he’s smart. Seokjin holds a lot of people by their necks and no witch dares get close to him, really… He’s a bit of a local legend if I’m being honest.”

Jimin smiles – yeah, that sounds a lot like something Seokjin would end up doing. Jungkook looks down at where Jimin is still holding his hand ever since they sat down and it finally dawns on him how close he is to having to let him go. It’s too risky for Jimin on the ground and he can’t even ponder the possibility of asking him to stay.

“I know Hoseok and Yoongi are friends with him.” Jungkook’s focus comes back when Sooyoung mentions the two men from the shop.

“So we have to go back there.” He concludes and Jimin looks at him with fear evident in his face.

“I’m sorry, I have no way of contacting them.” Sooyoung sighs. “I can go there if you don’t want to, though.”

“Absolutely not.” Jimin says, and both Jungkook and his mother know there’s no way they’ll change his mind. “We’ll go. Just… not today.”

Jimin ends up taking another nap during the afternoon while Jungkook sits outside rethinking about the events of the day. Thankfully, Sooyoung understands he wants some time to think and doesn’t come out to talk to him.

He’s decided that he will do whatever it takes to send Jimin home, especially now that he got a glimpse of how dangerous it can really be for him to stay on the ground. It’s not something Jungkook is happy about, but he has never been selfish and he’s not about to start now.

He remembers his talk with Jimin when the star asked him about what being in love was like. Jungkook thinks about his words, how he said it was painful and complicated, but worth it. He ponders on that statement and matches it with his own feelings right now, not exactly thrilled when he comes to the late conclusion that he is, indeed, in love with Jimin despite not knowing him for long.

His heart hurts and Jungkook takes a deep breath before curling into himself and closing his eyes. He doesn’t know how long he spends like this but it’s enough for the temperature outside to start dropping and for someone to come find him.

He can feel Jimin’s presence next to him before he even hears his voice. “Aren’t you cold?” The star asks softly as if not to disturb him too much as he takes a seat next to him.

“No.” Jungkook mumbles, still without lifting his head to look at him. Jimin touches his arm slowly, his warm fingers contrasting with Jungkook’s skin.

“Your arm is cold...”

Jungkook sighs before finally turning to face him, resting the side of his head on his knees that are being hugged by his arms. “I didn’t even notice.”

They stay like that for a while, just staring at each other in a meaningful silence. Even hurting the way he is right now Jungkook can’t help but still be taken aback by how beautiful Jimin is; every little detail that makes up who he is is perfect, it seems like he was carefully drawn to awe everyone with his beauty.

“I don’t want to go either.” Jimin says, so quietly Jungkook only hears it because they’re absolute silent.

“But you can’t stay.” He anticipates what Jimin was going to say next.

Jimin only nods and that’s the end of that conversation.

Jimin is curled up next to Jungkook on the couch when Dowoon gets home. He stops for a moment to look at them but doesn’t say anything when Sooyoung shakes her head at him from the kitchen. She beckons him over and tells him what happened, adding her own input that she hadn’t shared with the two that morning.

Dinner is silent, and not in a good way. Jimin is deep in thought about something he won’t tell Jungkook no matter how many times he asked, but by now he was able to gather it doesn’t have anything to do with the incident at the magic shop. Jungkook, on his part, is trying to get used to the idea of losing Jimin when he spent the day with him in his arms. His parents are worried about things they’re not supposed to tell their son, both trying to think of ways to help without risking their lives.

Dowoon decides he needs a night walk on the park and takes Sooyoung with him, leaving Jimin and Jungkook alone in the living room to deal with the heavy atmosphere that surrounds them.

There’s a random romance playing on the television when Jungkook turns it on and he leaves it there because he just can’t be bothered to look for something else – and in all honesty, he’s just after a source of noise to fill the space between them. Jimin sits closer to him than he needs to, their arms and legs touching before he risks to bring their hands together.

Jungkook watches him more than he watches the movie, aware that every precaution he tried to take not to fall too deeply already went down the drain and that he’s gotten to a point of no return now. Jimin seems to be into whatever is going on in the television and the way he is so focused on it brings a fond smile to Jungkook’s lips before his eyes wander to the movie to see if it really is worth his time.

“What does kissing feel like?” Jimin asks suddenly and Jungkook turns to him so quickly he nearly hurts his neck. The star is not looking at him, though; instead, he’s watching the movie intently with a frown on his face and his head tilted to one side as he studies the scene.

“Uh…” Jungkook tries to start but his entire train of thought is interrupted when Jimin turns to face him and he has to do his best not to focus on his plump lips.

“I mean, isn’t it weird?” Jimin goes on, apparently unaware of the way Jungkook’s eyes are about to jump out of their sockets. “This is something I’ve always wondered watching humans, why do you like exchanging bodily fluids so much?”

“That’s…” Jungkook starts, clearing his throat when his voice comes out higher than expected. “We don’t really think about that when we’re doing it.” He chooses to say, hoping to convey at least a little bit of nonchalance.

“But why do you like kissing so much?” Jimin insists, gaze going back to the television where the couple is still going at it.

“Because it feels good.” Jungkook answers simply, relieved that at least Jimin’s attention isn’t on him anymore and he can breathe.

“How can that feel so good?” Jimin muses, pursing his lips, and Jungkook is so hypnotized by them that he can’t even stop himself from saying,

“I can show you.”

“What?” Jimin questions, eyes back on Jungkook as if he just grew another head, though there’s the hint of a smile on his lips – Jungkook knows because he’s staring.

“What?” He tries to play it cool as if he didn’t say anything but Jimin squints at him and there’s no hiding that grin now.

“Jeon Jungkook…”

“That’s my name, yeah…” Jungkook puts some distance between them and tries to look somewhere else but his eyes land on the television and he realizes maybe a bit too late that that movie was not the best suited one to watch with Jimin. He jumps when he hears what’s definitely a moan and he’s quick to turn it off.

His second bad choice of the night because now they’re drowning in absolute silence and Jimin can most likely hear even his heartbeat.

“What did you just say?” Jimin mutters, that little smile still there.

“Nothing.” Jungkook answers way too quickly, more as a reflex than the actual truth.

“I heard you, you know…” The star giggles, then, and Jungkook would be basking in the sound if he wasn’t dying on the inside.

“Then why are you asking me to repeat it?” It comes out as almost a whine, result of Jungkook’s frustration for talking too much and wanting to bury himself right there.

“Because I want to hear it again.” Jimin answers simply, as if he’s not embarrassed at all. “Would you really kiss me?”

“Yeah, I…” Jungkook sighs, figuring that he’s already digging his own grave, might as well jump in it. “You have really nice lips.” He regrets adding that last part as soon as it comes out of his mouth because the entire house goes dead silent, it’s like the whole world stopped after those words were said. He doesn’t risk looking at Jimin, either, too scared of what his silence might mean.

“Show it to me, then.” Jimin finally says and Jungkook looks up at him so fast he gets whiplash.

“Do you really want that?” He asks, voice betraying how shocked he feels. “I mean, you just said it’s weird…”

“I did, but… it’s you.” Jimin says with a smile and a shrug. “I’m sure it’s going to be good if it’s with you.” Again, he spills out those words like they mean nothing; like they don’t make Jungkook’s heart skip two beats in a row.

Jungkook tries not to let it show how pleased he is by that statement but fails and Jimin giggles at him. He ignores the burning of his cheeks and leans in, holding Jimin’s face gently in his right hand; Jungkook watches as Jimin’s eyes flicker to his lips before he licks his own in anticipation and he thinks that he could very well pass as human with the way he’s acting.

“I think I like you, Jungkookie...” Jimin whispers like a secret, now looking straight at Jungkook’s mouth.

Their lips are about to touch when there’s an explosion in the backyard. Jungkook tenses up, reminded of the night Jimin fell and it was exactly like that; he just hopes his mother’s garden is still safe and sound.

He gets up and Jimin does too, standing behind him with both hands on his back as he uses him as a shield to whatever is outside. Jungkook belatedly remembers the back door is unlocked and he curses internally when the handle turns before the door is swinging open with far more force than necessary; Jimin hides entirely behind him and Jungkook’s left arm goes around him to keep the star there.

“Where is he?” The newcomer says, low voice sounding so much like a growl it makes Jungkook’s entire being shake with fear; not that the man in front of him looks particularly scary – they’re about the same height and Jungkook is definitely more built than him, but his attitude is so aggressive it’s terrifying.

Jungkook is thinking about escape routes when Jimin gets out of hiding and straight into the stranger’s line of sight.

“Tae?!” Jimin asks, voice a pitch higher, and Jungkook is only a little bit relieved that they know each other.

“Jiminie.” The man, Tae, sighs when his eyes land on the star and he approaches them quickly. His entire demeanor is intimidating and Jungkook instinctively takes a few steps back and away from him.

“What are you doing here?” Jimin looks absolutely lost, a frown disrupting his previously smiling face; Jungkook hates it and he hates this Tae guy, whoever he is, for interrupting them when they were about to kiss.

“Only you could make me fall and walk between these…” He eyes Jungkook up and down and clears his throat, the disdain evident in his face. “Beings.” Tae finishes his sentence and Jungkook scoffs.

“You fell for me?” Jimin is still frowning and he completely disregards the way the other star was so rude completely; it hurts Jungkook just a little bit.

“Obviously! I came to get you…” He answers Jimin and holds his face carefully, studying him closely. “Don’t you want to go back home?”

“Well, I…” Jimin hesitates, looking back at Jungkook with wide eyes. It’s the first time Jungkook sees him in doubt when asked that question.

“Jimin, no…” Tae says, sounding utterly disappointed. “A human?”

“What even is your problem with humans?” Jungkook spits out, done with the way this star is talking to him as if he’s better. “Are stars such almighty beings that our mere existence stains yours?”

“Yes.” He answers like it’s obvious. Jungkook knows he’s one second away from punching him when he hears Jimin’s sweet voice.

“It’s not like that, Tae, he’s… he’s pure.” Jimin says softly in what’s probably an attempt at making them calm down. It doesn’t work.

“There’s no such thing as a pure human, Jimin.” Tae scoffs before his eyes land on Jungkook.

“Wait, Taehyung, no!”

Before Jimin can stop him, Taehyung is crossing the living room and grabbing Jungkook’s face in his hands, forcing him to look him in the eyes. Jimin can only stand to the side and watch, knowing he’s not supposed to break the connection. He knows Taehyung is going to find what he’s looking for, that small light deep inside Jungkook’s eyes that prove he really is a pure human; Jimin just hopes it’s enough for him to not start a war against the boy who saved him. It would be easier if Jungkook could remember but they’re only stars, they can’t make him do that or know who he used to be.

“What the fuck, dude?”

“Huh…” Taehyung mutters, frowning at Jungkook and completely ignoring the curse at him. “Thought your kind was extinct.”

“Excuse me, my… my kind?” Jungkook doesn’t know if he’s more angry or confused; either way, it’s not a good combination for him.

“Pure humans haven’t been around in a long time.” Taehyung says, clenching his jaw as he studies him. “I should know…” He says with authority. “I killed the last one.”

Jungkook pauses as his heart skips a beat. “What, why?”

“He was a threat.” Comes the simple answer. Jungkook thinks it’s insane how he can just talk about murder like that.

“So, what, you’re gonna kill me too?” He challenges.

“Don’t tempt me, human.” Taehyung smiles at him, but it doesn’t look pretty. It’s more like bearing his teeth; he feels like prey.

“I have a name, you know.” Jungkook still doesn’t back down.

“And I don’t care.” The star glares at him before turning to Jimin. “Let’s go home, Min.”

“No…” He moves away from Taehyung slightly when he approaches.

“Jimin, the ground is dangerous for us.” Taehyung argues and it kind of sounds like he’s a parent talking to their kid.

“I know, but-“ Jimin looks between Taehyung and Jungkook as his sentence trails off. The action isn’t well received by Taehyung, who looks up at the sky and takes a deep calming breath.

“Don’t risk your life for a human.” He warns. “It doesn’t end well.”

“I-“

They’re interrupted by the front door being kicked open. A tall man walks in like he owns the place and did not just barge in uninvited. There’s an air of superiority to him and it shows especially in the small smirk that doesn’t leave his lips. He’s gorgeous, Jungkook can’t help but to notice even though he’s terrified of getting killed right there.

“Well, if it isn’t my favorite soldier in the entire galaxy.” The man starts, voice melodic despite all the sarcasm dripping from it when he notices Taehyung. “Oh, what a surprise to see you down here as well…” His smile grows slightly when his eyes land on Jimin, tone turning sweeter. “Never thought I’d see the day your brothers would let you past the gates, little prince. How about you come give me a hug? It’s been a while…”

“Seokjin…” Taehyung warns, holding him back with a giant sword that Jungkook is sure just materialized out of thin air.

“Come on, ease up on his leash a little.” Seokjin rolls his eyes. The way he holds himself is majestic, like he should be wearing a crown right now and wearing gold-covered clothes.

“He’s my brother.” Taehyung says, not bulging.

“So am I, you should trust me.” Seokjin answers, his tone back to mocking. Jimin never gave him names when he told them this story, but Jungkook can make the connections now that he sees them interacting.

“Not anymore.”

Seokjin stares hard at Taehyung before giving up on him and turning his attention to Jimin. “Did you fall?” He asks softly. “Did that thing hit you while you were dancing around the sky?” Jimin nods and Jungkook must notice the anxiety coming off of him in waves because one of his hands come to wrap around the star’s wrist. That doesn’t go unnoticed by the other two in the room. “And would you look at that, a human to make this party even better…” Jungkook shivers when Seokjin’s eyes finally land on him. He feels trapped in place by how strong his gaze is. “You know that if he actually needed protection, you’d be as good as dead, right? I mean, I could kill you as easily as I can eat a bowl of your favorite food.”

“But that’d give him time to escape.” Jungkook answers without even thinking about it.

Seokjin’s eyes soften for a millisecond, but it’s enough for Jungkook to catch up on it. He can see everything Jimin told him about his brother in him right now.

“A pure human, I’d recognize one of you anywhere…” He tries to maintain his posture but the sadness still seeps through his smile. “What does it feel like, Taehyung, to watch your favorite brother make the same mistake you condemned me for all those centuries ago?” Seokjin asks, glancing down to where Jimin intertwined his fingers with Jungkook’s.

“You really don’t want to start a fight with me right now, Seokjin.” Taehyung almost growls. Jungkook really doesn’t like him.

“Me, start a fight with the head of the army? No, thank you.” There’s mockery in every word that comes out of his mouth whenever he’s talking to Taehyung but Seokjin’s eyes tell Jungkook a different story; he just looks sad. “I really only wanted the necklace, it is in no way an interest of mine to hurt Jimin, but…” He sighs almost theatrically. “Since you want to do it the hard way, I think I’ll leave you to deal with the others that are also looking for it.”

“What are you talking about?” For the first time since he arrived, Taehyung doesn’t look so sure of himself.

“Oh, you’ll find out soon enough.” Seokjin doesn’t bother explaining, already with his back to them. “I’d keep a tight watch on the little prince from now on… they won’t be as nice as me. He says as he walks away and towards the destroyed front door. “And, uh…” Seokjin stops abruptly and turns around to face Jungkook. “Be careful around Taehyung, boy. Last time one of us fell in love with a human he chopped his neck off.”

And with that, he leaves.

Taehyung comes over to where they’re standing and cups Jimin’s face carefully, making Jimin let go of Jungkook without even noticing. Jungkook chooses to ignore the way there’s a lump in his throat. “Are you okay?” Taehyung asks, searching all over him for anything wrong.

“Yeah. Tae, I’m fine.” Jimin glances at Jungkook before focusing back on his brother. “Let’s talk outside.”

Jimin pulls Taehyung to the garden and Jungkook decides his brain is probably going into overdrive because he can only sit down on the couch and think about how the hell he’s going to fix the front door before his parents get home.

Needless to say, Dowoon freaks out when he and Sooyoung get home to find another star under their roof. Luckily, Jungkook managed to fix the door hinges just before they arrived.

“You can kick that one out, it really is getting too crowded here.” Jungkook mutters when they’re all seated on the couch to figure out what to do to send them both back up to the sky.

Jimin holds Taehyung by the wrist when he threatens getting up to go to Jungkook for his comment.

Sooyoung shoots Jungkook a look of reprehension and he only shrugs. She takes a deep breath and glances at Dowoon, who’s already watching her; she knows he wants her to make the call.

“It’s late and I’m sure we’re all exhausted.” Sooyoung starts, point proven by how Jimin yawns right after she says that. “Let’s all rest and we’ll talk about this tomorrow morning, alright?”

“If we don’t have any other choice...” Taehyung agrees, way more easily than Jungkook would expect him to. “I’ll stay down here with Jiminie.”

“Um...” Jimin starts, getting his brother’s attention instantly. He looks almost scared to tell him that he’s been acquiring human costumes since he fell. “I actually need to sleep.”

“Sleep?” Taehyung frowns. “Now?”

Jimin shrugs. Jungkook hates the way he makes himself look smaller. “Got used to it.”

“Fine, I’ll stay on guard with you, then.”

“No way in hell.” Jungkook nearly yells. “Minie sleeps in my room and I’m not about to let you sit there like a creep while I sleep.”

“You two sleep together?” Taehyung asks, jaw set and eyebrow raised.

“Yeah, you got a problem with that?” Jungkook smirks at him. He has no idea where all this aggressiveness is coming from but he just can’t help it.

“I do, how did you guess?” Comes the condescending remark and it’s Jungkook that clenches his jaw this time.

“Can the two of you, please, stop?” Jimin asks with a sigh. “Jungkookie and I will go to sleep and you’ll stay here.” He says to Taehyung and Jungkook gets up from the couch, doing everything he can not to look too smug; he really doesn’t want Jimin to be upset. “Good night, everyone.” Jimin finishes and marches up the stairs without bothering to look back because he knows Jungkook will follow right after.

“What did you mean when you called me a pure human?” Jungkook asks once they’re lying down facing each other just like they did the previous night.

“Oh, um…” Jimin seems taken aback by the sudden question but he figured Jungkook would bring it up eventually. “It’s not really the best term in my opinion but it comes from a belief that humans like you have a pure blood because of hierarchy.”

Jungkook frowns. “What do you mean?”

“You were adopted, right?” Jimin avoids his question, not sure where to start.

Jungkook’s frown deepens. “Uh, yeah, how did you- what does this have to do with anything?”

“How do I say this?” He mutters more to himself. “Um… you’re an angel.” Jimin decides to just put it out there.

“I- Thank you?”

Jimin laughs and slaps his arm lightly, but Jungkook still has no idea what’s so funny. “No, I mean literally. You’re an angel.”

“I… What?” Jungkook likes to think he’s pretty smart but right now his brain just seems to have gone blank.

“Well, now you’re human but… you were an angel once.” Jimin says as if it’s the most normal thing in the world to drop a bomb like that on someone. “Probably a very important one, too, if you’re here right now.”

Jungkook’s mouth opens and closes a few times before he finally says, “Jimin, you’re not making any sense.”

“What don’t you understand?” Jimin asks softly. It kind of looks like he’s talking to a toddler.

“You said I was an angel once!” He tries to keep his voice down for the sake of his parents sleeping at the other end of the hallway. “How am I supposed to just accept that information? I mean, a week ago I was just here living my life and now I have to deal with stars and witches and now angels, too?”

“Okay, calm down…” Jimin giggles at the way Jungkook’s voice goes an octave higher at the end of his rant. “Yes, angels are real but they’re not really the way you would imagine them to be.” He starts, and Jungkook is thankful for the way he’s talking slowly, it helps ease him into it. “They’re like stars, we’re all beings of light, but they’re more powerful than us. Angels can walk on the ground freely and go back whenever they want to, they come down here on missions and they can get in touch with humans as they please, depending on what their role is.”

“What do you mean, role?”

“All angels have a purpose and something they’re supposed to do. Most of them are warriors or protectors, but there are also angels that take care of smaller causes.”

“Warriors?” Jungkook questions, trying to piece everything together when there’s too much being thrown at him at once. “Like Taehyung?”

“Yes. We have our army and they have theirs, but stars and angels usually battle together.” Jimin smiles softly before he finishes. “You were probably one of them.”

Jungkook sits up at that. “Excuse me?”

“It’s not common for angels to come back as humans, unless they were really important or had a big role in something major previously.” Jimin explains while he sits up too. “Usually, only warriors can do that.”

“Okay?” Jungkook tries to deal with that information. He searches the back of his brain for something, anything, but finds nothing. “I don’t remember ever going to war, though.”

“That’s normal.” Jimin shakes his head at him. “Pure humans have their memories from their previous life repressed when they come back. I don’t know how it works from there, so I can’t tell you, but you should ask Sooyoung.”

Jungkook frowns for what feels like the hundredth time in a span of ten minutes. “Why?”

Jimin seems to hesitate before he answers. “Every pure human has a caretaker; in your case, your parents.”

“So they know everything you’re telling me?” Jungkook asks, unconsciously raising his voice because of all the frustration he’s feeling. “Is that what they have been hiding?”

“Yes, but before you get angry at them for not telling you, know that they can’t.” Jimin reaches out to put a hand on his knee. “The same reason Sooyoung told you she can’t help me get back home. I actually wasn’t supposed to tell you either but I think it’s unfair that you’re the only one who doesn’t know.”

“Why’s that?” Jungkook places his hand over Jimin’s and does his best to calm himself down.

“Caretakers are supposed to assure pure humans’ safety and well-being, nothing more than that.” Jimin pauses and just stares at him for a moment before he decides his next words. “Jungkook, did you know your mother is a witch?”

“A what now?” He deadpans.

“Not the spell-casting type of witch, she’s more human than you would assume.” Jimin explains quickly. “Your father is human but from what she told me he was offered as a kid so other witches took him in and raised him.”

“That’s… what the fuck.” Jungkook says for lack of anything better. He honestly can’t believe what his life has come to in the span of a few days. It almost doesn’t feel real.

“I know, right?” Jimin agrees. “Anyways, they can’t help me because when they’re assigned with the task to watch over pure humans, caretakers make a deal to not get involved with anything else. If they do and get caught, they’re killed.” He sighs, looking away from Jungkook. “I mean, it’s risky for them to even have me and Tae here.”

“Are you serious?” Jungkook’s heart skips a beat at that. He understands now why his father was so adamant that Jimin leaves as soon as possible and why he absolutely lost his mind when Taehyung got there, too. He can’t just kick Jimin out to deal with his situation himself but he doesn’t want anything to help to his parents either.

“Very.” Jimin answers, gaze back to him. “I won’t let anything bad happen to them, though.” He assures, squeezing Jungkook’s hand on top of his.

“I trust you.” Jungkook says, earning a smile from Jimin for it.

They sit like that before Jimin breaks the silence.

“Hey, Jungkookie?” He starts off shyly. “Do you remember what we were talking about before Taehyung got here?”

The mood instantly changes after that. Suddenly, Jungkook can feel all the warmth that’s radiating from Jimin’s body and he realizes how close they actually are on his bed. “Yeah?”

“Can we pick up from where we left off?” Jimin looks up at Jungkook through his eyelashes making him gulp.

“I don’t think that’s a… good idea.” He almost can’t finish his sentence because he catches Jimin licking his lips.

“Why not?” Jimin asks innocently while he uses his hand that’s on Jungkook’s thigh as advantage to get closer, their noses nearly touching.

“Fuck Jimin, you’re making it really hard for me to resist you right now.” Jungkook mutters, eyes glued to Jimin’s inviting mouth.

“That’s the whole point. Why would you even want to resist me anyway?” Jimin says in what sounds almost like a whine.

“I don’t want your brother to kill me.” Jungkook answers, though he’s fairly close to throwing caution out the window.

“He’s not going to, I won’t let him.” Jimin smiles. “Kiss me, Jungkook.”

A wave of electricity courses through Jungkook’s body as soon as their lips touch. He kisses Jimin’s top lip softly, then sucks the bottom one in between his own, taking it slow so that Jimin can keep up; his first kiss was a disaster, he doesn’t want Jimin’s to be bad too.

Jungkook pulls away to look into the star’s eyes, getting a shy smile in response before Jimin scoots even closer to him and takes the initiative to kiss him this time.

They share chaste close-mouthed kisses for a while, Jungkook alternating between Jimin’s lips, his cheeks and his cute nose. Jimin giggles as a blush paints his face a pretty shade of pink and lets Jungkook do as he pleases. He can’t deny he’s more than enjoying the attention and the affection the boy is giving him, heart fluttering inside his chest and warmth filling his entire body. Jungkook, on his side, is not too different; the butterflies in his stomach are going crazy and he can’t actually believe he has Jimin for himself like this. It’s unreal that in such a short time he could feel something so strong for him but Jungkook accepts it now despite knowing he’ll leave; he’s decided to enjoy this and Jimin’s soft lips for the moment being.

“Show me how good kissing can feel, Jungkookie.” Jimin sighs against his mouth and closes the distance between them again.

Jungkook doesn’t waste time to lick the seam of Jimin’s lips and then inside his mouth when the star opens up for him obediently. His hand goes to the back of Jimin’s neck to turn his head at a better angle for them and Jimin gasps as Jungkook traces the roof of his mouth with the tip of his tongue.

Jimin has a strong grip on the front of Jungkook’s shirt trying to bring him even closer. The kiss is slow, sensual and everything Jimin never knew he could experience. When Jungkook bites down on his lip, Jimin hears himself whine and he tangles his fingers in Jungkook’s hair, desperate to just keep kissing him forever.

Jungkook forgets everything as they kiss, it’s like they have their own little bubble where nothing else matters but them. Jimin’s lips meld with his perfectly and he doesn’t think he has ever felt this good kissing someone in his life.

Jimin is very responsive and a fast learner, too, even going to the point of turning demanding when he thinks Jungkook is going easy on him. His hands go from Jungkook’s hair to the sides of his neck down to his shoulders, biceps, then up again, and it’s clear that he’s enjoying himself just as much as Jungkook is.

“Want more.” Jimin pants in between kisses and Jungkook stops to look at him.

“More?” He asks, not exactly sure what Jimin is asking of him.

“Want to feel you closer.” Jimin clarifies before pushing Jungkook’s hands away from him for a second only to straddle him next.

Jungkook freezes. “Jimin...” He warns, already feeling his body start to respond to the warmth on his lap.

“Please, Jungkookie...” Jimin pouts, seemingly already having figured out that it’s Jungkook’s weakness. “You said you’d show me.”

And Jungkook can’t resist him, not even if he tried. So he kisses Jimin again, harder than before, while his hands travel down his torso to his waist until they end up on his thighs, squeezing hard and making Jimin jump and moan quietly against his mouth. Jungkook groans as his touch wanders to meet the hot skin of Jimin’s waist under his shirt – no, scratch that, Jungkook’s shirt, because Jimin has been wearing his clothes ever since he got there and just that reminder makes Jungkook want him even more.

Jimin shudders when Jungkook moves to start kissing his neck, letting out little noises of approval as he still struggles to bring the boy closer to him in an attempt to satisfy his needy self. When Jungkook drags his teeth against the sensitive skin right under Jimin’s ear the star jumps on his lap, creating some accidental friction that makes him moan loudly when he feels it.

“Shh...” Jungkook pulls away to talk to him. “Be quiet, baby.” He says, the petname escaping him easily. They exchange a smile of complicity before kissing again, the need between them increasing along with the temperature in the room.

Jungkook maneuvers them so that they’re lying down with him in between Jimin’s legs. They continue kissing but now Jimin takes the chance to touch Jungkook better, curious hands exploring under his shirt over the expanse of his back, leaving faint scratches behind as Jungkook grabs his thighs and leaves wet kisses down to his collarbones.

“Ah-” Jimin moans again when Jungkook experimentally rolls their hips together. “Jungkook...” He sighs with his eyes closed.

“What do you think you’re doing?” They hear suddenly and then Jungkook is being forcefully pulled away from Jimin only to end up with Taehyung’s sword against his throat.

“Oh, come on…” He mutters, not even able to move too much.

“What do you think you’re doing?” Jimin scolds as he gets up from the bed. His lips are red and swollen and his hair is a mess from Jungkook’s hands; he looks even more breathtaking than usual.

“Protecting you.” Taehyung answers as if it’s obvious, not giving Jungkook the slightest chance to escape from his grip.

“I agree that there are those who deserve to be on the other end of your sword but Jungkook is not one of them.” Jimin says seriously. Jungkook hasn’t seen him angry yet but by the way his eyes are hard he’s sure he is about to. “Let him go.”

Taehyung stares at Jimin for what feels like forever before he finally pushes Jungkook away from him, making the boy stumble.

“I swear I’m never kissing you again.” He says as he fixes his shirt and rubs at the place where the sword touched his neck.

“Good.” Taehyung still says.

Jimin bites the inside of his cheek and shakes his head. “You know, I didn’t mind you being so overprotective of me when we were back home, but that’s only because I never knew how much I was missing out on.” He lashes out. His entire posture has changed from what Jungkook knows and he looks more intimidating than ever. “I mean, even watching humans was something you barely let me do.”

“That’s because we knew you’d be just like Seokjin…” Taehyung tries to argue. “And we were right.”

“What’s so wrong about being like him?” Jimin asks, sounding offended enough for both him and his brother.

“He betrayed us!” Taehyung’s voice sounds like thunder when he raises it to try showing Jimin he’s right.

“He fell in love!” Jimin counters, anger slipping through every syllable.

“Jimin…” Jungkook reaches out for the star but he’s left ignored.

“He never did anything wrong, admit it.” Jimin goes on. He finally has the opportunity and the motive to voice out all of his frustrations, he’s not about to stop.

“He turned against his roots, he killed my best friend!” Taehyung roars out. Jungkook looks between them edging on desperate; he doesn’t want them to argue, but he has no idea if it’s a good call to put himself in between the two brothers when they’re like this.

“Because you decapitated the man he was in love with just to prove a point!” Jimin yells. If Jungkook’s parents weren’t awake before they definitely are now. “Did you really think that by doing that you would get him to agree with you? You killed an innocent human, Taehyung, and you didn’t even hesitate!” Jungkook flinches at the accusatory tone and it’s not even directed at him. Jimin’s words are harsh and he can see how much they affect Taehyung.

“I had to.” That’s the only thing the other star says, and it comes out quiet unlike his tone from just a minute ago.

“Bullshit!” Jimin, on the other hand, is still very much pissed off. The curse word shocks everyone in the room, probably even Jimin himself.

“Hey-” Jungkook tries to touch him again but he’s stopped by Taehyung’s hard gaze.

“You’re spending way too much time with Jungkook, you’re starting to act just like him.” Taehyung comments, clearly disappointed at how human his brother sounds. Jungkook glares at him, deciding to stop trying to calm Jimin down and just let him yell at him how many times he wants.

“At least he’s not a controlling cold-blooded killer.” Jimin’s words leave both Jungkook and Taehyung stunned, neither having expected to hear such a clear accusation from him.

Before any of them can react Jimin is out of the room and they hear his running footsteps down the stairs all the way to the back door.

“See what you’ve done?” Taehyung focuses back on Jungkook, who is not in the mood to deal with him right now. Or ever.

“You can’t blame me for the way you treat your brother.” He bites back simply because he can’t let him have the last word in anything and turns around to leave, but is held back by Taehyung’s hand on his elbow.

“So petulant.” Taehyung towers over him even though they’re the same height. It’s all in his eyes, the way they tell Jungkook they’ve seen things his human brain can’t even imagine, and in all the anger saved up in them. “I could kill you right now, do you realize that?”

“Do it.” He challenges. “I’m sure that’s going to help your relationship with Jimin.” Jungkook says before pulling his arm free and rushing down to the garden, where he knows he’ll find Jimin.

It’s cold outside when Jungkook reaches the lines of pots Jimin and his mom rearranged on the day he got there. He does find him, but he also finds someone else.

Carrying Jimin with a tight grip on his arm and a hand over his mouth, there’s a man Jungkook has never seen before. Next to him, also holding onto them and smiling wickedly at a terrified Jungkook, is the woman from Hoseok’s shop. Jimin can only shoot him a pleading look before she lights up a candle and, in a second, they’re gone.

#jikook #kookmin #jikook fic #kookmin fic #ao3 #nat writes

[too-much-kpop-trash]

Chapter 4 (E)

A month. Four weeks. 30 days. It's a long time to be separated from someone who you have strong feelings for. It has been exactly a month since Tae left to do some secret project and to say I missed him was an understatement. I missed the others too, even Da Yeon had to go. I wasn't allowed to go, even though Tae was willing to not pack any clothes and just bring me instead. I was asked to stay for a reason I've long forgotten now. The only good news is that they're coming back today. The only bad thing is later on we're going to some place that has alcohol and where there's alcohol there will be some sort of trouble. I was waiting in the airport. Traffic was terrible and I got here just as the plane landed. To say I was excited to see everyone would also be an understatement. I hear their laughter before I see them. Jimin's first followed by Jin. They see me and run like toddlers over to me, squeezing the life out of me. Yoongi and Hobi are next, I receive a look of 'god help me' from Yoongi and a hug from Hobi. Jungkook, Namjoon, Da Yeon, and Tae are last. Tae pushes everyone aside and runs to me, hugging me like it would be the last time he got to. I'm sure I did the same. He quickly(unnoticeably) kisses my neck and gives me his box-smile. I receive a hug from the other 3 and before I know it, we're on our way out of the airport. Tae drags me to the back of the van and holds my hands in his lap, his arms around me. Da Yeon sends me a suggesting look, which I look down, red faced. I hear her snicker and whisper something to Namjoon, which he shushes her and glances back at us, a smile on his face. The rest of the boys are too tired to notice anything, which was good for me. Once we got back, everyone went their separate ways while I stayed back and listened to what Da Yeon was telling me. I see a smug look on her face and give her a questioning look. "You don't think I wouldn't notice that kiss?" I groan. She laughs almost evilly. "So are you guys together, right?" I furrow my brows. My silence made Da Yeon's smile disappear. "Wait a minute. You're telling me my OTP has kissed, probably more then once, but Tae hasn't asked you out yet?" I roll my eyes at her dramatic-ness. "And to think, that was your first kiss!" My eyes widen at her outburst. Unluckily for me, Tae overheard her as he was coming towards us. "Can you keep you're voice down" I hiss quietly, my face beet red, again. Tae, either not hearing it or hearing it, doesn't mention anything as he puts his arm on my shoulder. "Namjoon wants you for some reason, too lazy to tell you himself" Tae tells Da Yeon, twitching his nose as if it was itchy. "Alright, I'll be back" she says, giving me a look before she takes off to find Namjoon, probably not returning. Already feeling Tae's eyes on my face, I slowly turn my head and face him. I lean my head on his shoulder. "I'm tired. Can we cuddle?" Tae looks down at me, his lips in a pout and his puppy eyes showing. I let a little laugh out and nod, Tae's pout turning into a smile. He takes my arm and pulls me along, walking slower then usual. When we finally reach his room, Tae collapses on his bed, moving over for me to fit. As soon as I even sit down, Tae has his arms around me. My head was on his chest, which the sound of his breathing calmed me down. We we're silent for a while, I think Tae might of drifted off even because when I look up at him, his eyes are closed and his breathing is a lot steadier. I play with his hands, intertwining our fingers and smiling slightly. I glance up at him occasionally, making sure he's still sleeping. After a while, I look up to see him already looking at me. He doesn't say anything but leans down and captures my lips in his own. It wasn't a fast and passionate kiss. It was more like a soft, meaningful kiss. Then again, I'm taking it off of the other couple of kisses I've shared with Tae and all I've read in cute and cliché stories. "Was that kiss really your first kiss?" Tae asks softly, bringing his forehead against mine. I nod, too embarrassed to say anything. He takes a moment to reply, brushing stray hair out of my face. "If I knew that, I would have tried to make it more romantic." He pouts. "It was perfect Tae. It's all I could ask for." I close in the space between us, pecking his lips. He stays quiet, to busy thinking I guess. I lay my head back on to his chest, closing my own eyes. I seriously dread later. *~* The place was too loud. Too busy. Too many people were here. You had to push against sweaty, grinding people to even breathe is seemed like. I didn't want to go in but seeing the excited look on Tae's face, I couldn't let him down. We were escorted upstairs, to a more private area. People were still around us but not as bad. A round of shots was given to us. I'm not a fan of alcohol. After all, it's a reason why many of my family members are in rehab. However, I still took the occasional shot when I was given one. Everyone was dancing except me, who was standing in the corner almost. Tae went God knows where with either Yoongi, or maybe it was Jin. I don't remember now. I saw a couple getting closer and closer to me so I moved, to where I was more in an open area. I felt someone come up behind me, alcohol strong on their breath. "Come here often?" Tae's deep voice whispers in my ear, which sends a shiver down my spine. He wraps his arms around my waist and starts to do what he does when he's drunk, which in dancing means grinding. Now, in certain situations, I would be red faced and too shocked to speak. But since I have alcohol in my system, I let the music fill my ears and dance along to the music. Tae finds it amusing at first, whispering things in my ear. Then, he starts to attack my neck in kisses, not caring if any other members saw us. I myself found it in me not to care. Tae flips me around to where I'm facing him and attacks my lips, alcohol strong on his lips. My arms wrapped around his neck while his arms stayed on my waist. He pulled away slightly, as if to mumble a couple of words against my lips before going back to kissing me. It got to the point to where my back was against the wall and Tae's entire body was against mine. He pulls away and glances around, then glancing at me. His eyes flicker around, his tongue finding its way through his parted lips. It was quiet a sight to see. Now, because of the small bit of alcohol in me, I have the bright idea to, in the best of words, start to grind slowly on Tae. It wasn't soon after when our lips meet. During this make out session, Tae's hands slowly go under my shirt, staying at my lower back. Tae uses this to push our bodies even more together if that was possible. We pull away when someone clears their throat a little to loudly. Almost everyone's eyes were on us, which causes my heat to come to my face. I hide my face in Tae's neck, not wanting to meet anyone's eyes. Tae laughs it off like no big deal, which makes me feel as if more heat were going go my face. Tae murmurs things in my ear, trying to get me to remove my hiding face. He finally coaxed me from hiding my face but moves to where we're sitting down and hiding from the others. I'm in his lap, as he refuses to let me sit by myself. I play with his hands as he tells me about random things. This goes on even after some of the others join us. After a while, we all get tired and decide to leave. Tae keeps me in front of him, guiding me through the people still standing. It seemed like an incredibly short drive and we were back in what seemed like seconds. Tae intertwined our fingers as we walked inside, him leading me upstairs. "Here, go to the bathroom and change. Don't forget to wipe any make up off. You don't want to sleep with it on" he says, handing me one of his shirts that I remember as being baggy on him. I go into the bathroom and strip out of my clothes, putting on the shirt Tae gave me. I grabbed a wash cloth and washed my face off before I forget. Last thing I did was put my hair up and I shut off the light. I rubbed my eyes as I walked over to Tae, who was already in bed. He opens his arms and I fall into them, sighing in relief. "Did you have fun princess?" Tae asks, placing a light kiss on my temple. "Yeah, did you?" I ask the same thing, cuddling closer to him. "Yeah" he strokes my back and starts to hum a song. Before I knew it, my eyes were closing and darkness was consuming me.