#Gina Zanetakos | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

takadasaiko · 4 years

Text

Love Me Twice: Chapter Eight

FFN II AO3

Summary: Reddington throws a wrench into their case, Liz chooses to trust Ressler with a secret, and TomJacob demands answers from Gina.

Chapter Eight

Trust was not something that came easily to her these days. Every time she started to put her faith in someone they flipped it around on her, and while Cooper had been known to walk that line professionally with her, she never would have dreamed he was capable of lying to her about something like this.

She'd been over it again and again. Reddington had told her first, and while he was far from a paramount of honesty, she had gone to Cooper directly. He had been there when Tom flatlined and they had taken him back to identify the body. Cooper had been kind and he had been gentle, but there had been no room to misinterpret what he'd said. He had been clear when he had told her that her husband was dead.

But that had been Tom in her mother's custody. Bruised and beaten, sure, but she knew him. She would always know him.

That meant that her boss had lied to her or someone had pulled a very, very convincing one over on him. Either way, someone powerful had made sure Elizabeth Keen had thought her husband was dead and had done something to him to keep him from remembering her. She'd be damned if she didn't find out who, and that trail started with Cooper.

Liz hadn't been able to sleep after getting back home the night before. She'd tossed and turned before finally rolling out of the bed she used to share with him and digging around in her closet. She'd moved nearly everything that reminded her of Tom to storage except a box that she kept in the very back for those dark days. They'd become fewer and fewer the longer she survived without him, but every now and again she needed to hold onto something.

Her fingers touched the lid of the old filing box shoved back behind her clothes and she pulled it out, tossing the various odds and ends that had piled up ontop of it back into the closet and removing the lid. There wasn't much inside. A couple of his favourite books, a jumpdrive with his interview with the adoption agency from their first marriage, a smaller box that held their wedding rings, and a few photos. She reached down, pulling the framed photo from a trip to Boston years before from the top and found herself staring at his smiling face. She missed him. She hadn't stopped missing him.

A sharp buzzing from her phone by the bed shattered the moment and Liz jumped. She shot it a glare before unfolding from her place on the floor, placing the photo back in the box and standing. A text from Ressler was lit up on the lock screen:

Cooper needs us in early.

Good. She needed to talk to Cooper too. If he'd lied to her, if he'd hidden the fact that Tom was alive for any reason, she needed to know.

Mornings at the Keen household were chaotic on a good day, but Liz had a cup of coffee down her throat and breakfast on the table before rousing Agnes a good hour before she normally would have. Her daughter moved sluggishly - late night tea and glitter parties with Uncle Donnie causing her to drag - as Liz made her way through her second cup and put her school bag together for her, reminding her once again that Shelly's mom had been willing to drop by early for carpool so they shouldn't make them wait.

Ten minutes later Agnes was out the door and on her way to school and Liz was speeding towards the Post Office, her focus on the question she needed an answer to.

It was everything Liz could do to stand still as the old, creaking lift sent her down to the basement level of the facility that they worked in, and she was through those faded yellow doors as soon as they started to open.

The Post Office was already buzzing with activity, other agents able to drop their lives and come in more quickly than she was. Liz barely heard Aram's chipper greeting as she barreled past him on her way to their boss' office. She knocked once and opened the door before Cooper had a chance to say if she should or not, halfway through, "Sir, we need to talk about-" before she realized that he wasn't alone. Ressler and Park stood at his desk, Park stopped mid-explanation, and Aram followed up behind her and excused himself as he entered as well. So much for a private conversation before everything started.

"Keen," Cooper greeted, "thank you for coming in early. We've had Krause move the meet to first thing this morning."

"Why?" Liz found herself asking. "Everything was in place."

"Reddington was insistent on being allowed to meet with The Collector before we transferred him in for questioning. A little too insistent."

"Not that he'd ever have an ulterior motive," Ressler grumbled, taking a sip from his to-go coffee cup clutched greedily in his hand. Right. He hadn't gotten a ton more sleep than Liz had.

"Do we know what he wants?" Park asked.

Cooper's dark gaze shifted over to Liz. "I believe it may have something to do with your mother."

"Why?"

"A hunch. Until Krause confirmed his existence, The Collector was a myth in the Cold War-era intelligence community. A man that moved secrets around like currency."

Aram shifted nervously. "So you think Mr Reddington is gonna… what? Use him to hurt Agent Keen's mother?"

"We don't know," Cooper answered. "He's insistent that he has no interest in harming Elizabeth's mother, but I'm not willing to risk it. We couldn't change the location without tipping him off that something was happening, but we were able to move up the time table. That should allow us to get in, take The Collector, and get out before Reddington realizes it."

Liz stared at him. It would have been easier to have just given Reddington whatever time he'd requested with the man rather than risk the whole op, but Cooper was going out of his way to protect her. To protect someone she loved. She swallowed hard, trying to push the guilt down with it. She shouldn't have questioned Cooper on Tom. He would never intentionally hurt her like that. She knew better and she was embarrassed to think that, even for a few hours, she'd questioned that loyalty after everything that they'd been through.

"Agent Keen, was there something that you needed to speak to me about before you roll out?" Cooper asked, pulling her attention back around.

She shook her head. "No sir. It can wait."

He hadn't known. He wouldn't have betrayed her like that, which meant someone else had. Someone with means and motive, but she couldn't think about that now, no matter how much her mind wanted to wander to the new mystery. They had a job to do.

--------

Jacob had been fourteen years old when he first stepped foot on the St Regis campus. He had been young and angry and bitter at the hands life had dealt him. His first memories were of foster care and no house lasted long. He'd land in one and be gone again in a month or two. Sometimes it was his own choice and other times they shoved him out the door the moment they realized that he didn't fit their image they had cooked up in their minds. And then, when he finally landed in a house that wanted to keep him enough that they made it official, it was all he could do to survive the experience.

Bud has saved him though. He hadn't cared that Jacob couldn't connect, that he couldn't empathize. He had taught him to use it. To outgrow the childish dream that said you had to have a family. He didn't need one. He didn't want one. And even if he had, they wouldn't have wanted him anyway. That's how he knew that Elizabeth Keen had to be lying.

He just didn't know how she'd gotten ahold of the kind of details that she had had. That's where everything fell apart. She was a fed. Maybe she had caught him? Investigated him? He had no way to know with a blaring decade's worth of missing memories, but he knew who would. And that's what had led him back to St Regis' home campus in upstate New York.

Jacob dropped the stolen car off at the gate to have them dispose of it before limping his way in towards Gina's office. He caught a few glances along the way, having only done the bare minimum to clean himself up and not catch attention. Various cuts had reopened on his trip upstate, leaving a newly dried smear of blood down the left side of his face from the cut along his eyebrow. Only the cap he'd snagged from the backseat of the stolen car did anything to shield him from curious eyes.

Gina wasn't in her office. It took some searching, but he finally found her at the far end of the campus on the training grounds. She watched from a secluded spot as students she had recruited ran drills, practiced skills, and were whipped into shape by a former drill sergeant.

It felt familiar. Mostly.

"Whatever happened to old Higgins?" Jacob asked by way of greeting. "You remember he used to run us into the ground when we were kids. I thought he'd never leave."

Gina turned, surprise clear for the barest of moments. "You look like shit. What happened?"

"Hit a snag."

She stood, motioning for him to follow her. "What kind of snag? I haven't heard from you or Tremblay since you left."

"She pay you?"

Gina's brows drew together questioningly and she led him into an old shed and out of the way of prying eyes. She turned towards him, her voice sharp. "What happened?"

"Tremblay knew a hell of a lot more than she was saying."

That didn't seem to help clear it up. "So what? Clients lie all the time. She pays and she-"

"Elizabeth Keen." The name stopped her mid sentence. "You know her? Because that's who Tremblay's been having me watch. Some fed on a task force that uses Raymond Reddington as her CI. And get this: the woman says she knew me. Married me."

"Tremblay said that?" Gina asked carefully.

"Keen. I got pinched by a woman she's been meeting with. Maddie Tolliver." That name didn't seem to ring any bells. "Had a chat-" he motioned to the cuts and bruises on his face - "and Keen showed up. Who is she?"

Gina cleared her throat. "A job. She was a job."

"She knew things."

"It was deep cover. You made her believe she was…. everything." She reached forward, fingers surprisingly gentle against his face. "Let's get you cleaned up."

"No, you don't get it. When I say she knew things, I mean real things. Things a mark couldn't have known. Did she investigate me?"

"Yes," Gina said a little too quickly and leaned forward, pressing her lips against him. "Forget about Keen and about Tremblay. I'll take care of it. Let's-"

"Why are you lying to me?"

A pair of soft brown eyes blinked hard. "I'm not."

"C'mon, Gina. I know every tell you've got." Little lies between them weren't unusual, but they were honest when it counted. They could trust each other even if the whole world was against them. That had always been the deal. "What the hell happened?"

He didn't like the look in her eyes. Indecision. Pain. Fear. "You married her," she said at last, her voice more unsteady than he'd ever heard it.

"As a job?"

She didn't answer, but the way her eyes darted said everything.

"I married her… for real? A fed? Bud would have…" his chest tightened dangerously and Jacob staggered back. "No."

"It doesn't matter."

"Bud gone, the new staff…. Did I-?"

"No," Gina cut him off, stepping closer again.

"Did she?"

That struck a nerve. "All she did was get you into trouble. I bailed you out. When the Major came for you, she wasn't even there. I was. I protected you, not her, and you still-" She sucked in a deep breath to steady herself. "It doesn't matter. You don't even remember her."

"Why is that?" Jacob managed, his tone more desperate than he would have liked.

"I don't know."

He studied her for a long moment. "How the hell am I supposed to believe anything you tell me? You lied to me."

"I protected you."

"No…." He winced, looking at the woman he'd grown up with, the only person he thought he could trust. "You got what you wanted, however you had to get it. It's my turn."

"What's that supposed to mean?"

"I want answers."

"Jacob…"

"I need answers, Gina, and I don't trust them coming from you. You're gonna let me walk."

"You can't just-"

"Watch me." He turned, leaving her standing in the shed alone. He'd given her more than two years of loyalty with nothing to show for it and he was done. He needed to know what happened in those missing years.

Jacob pulled his burner phone from his pocket and hit the speed dial. "Tremblay, it’s Phelps. We need to talk."

--------

It was early, but sleep was difficult to come by these days anyway. Dr Clemons had managed to regulate his new dose of medication to keep the tremors at bay. The side effects were troublesome though, a particularly irksome one leaving him with the most vivid dreams he'd ever had, and that was a high bar to reach. Some were good dreams. Bubbles and laughter and gentle touches. Red hair tickled his cheek and a pair of blue eyes that he hadn't seen in too many years peering into his. Then others, often more frequent than the more kinder dreams, left his heart racing. Death and destruction and failure. He didn't dare try to sleep again after those.

So Dembe found him awake, despite the orders to rest more. He had had Chuck and Morgan shadowing Bruno Krause as best they could and it had paid off. He'd hoped Harold would be willing to work with him, to trust him, but hopes weren't all meant to pan out. Instead the assistant director thought he was pulling a clever one over on them by switching up the time table.

"Cooper is not going to allow you to meet with him," Dembe mused as Reddington handed the phone back to him after giving Morgan their instructions.

Reddington sighed, shifting uncomfortably in his chair. "No, and that does complicate the matter. I'd hoped for a better outcome than this."

"I'll make the call and have Bernard meet them at the site."

"Yes," Reddington agreed. "Call me when it's done."

--------

"Everything okay this morning?" Ressler asked as they pulled up to meet Park and a handful of other undercover agents onsite. "You just about took Cooper's door off the hinges when you got there."

Liz glanced over from the driver's seat. "It was…." She pulled in a steadying breath. She wasn't very good at friendships. She knew that. It was easier for her to express that she cared by helping a friend hide a body than it was to admit to something personal when she wasn't backed into a corner. This was Ressler though. If anyone had proven himself trustworthy it was him. He was a steady voice of sound reason. An island of calm in the midst of her chaos. He could help her if she'd let him. He wanted to help her.

A tap on the window made her jump and Park stood there, waiting impatiently. Liz motioned to her and turned back to her partner. "Let's get this guy, then I'll tell you."

"I'm holding you to that, Keen."

She offered him the barest of smiles before piling out of the SUV to be met by the Metro PD officer that was explaining where his men were set up and, in turn, were ready to take orders to better assist the FBI.

His people were set up in a perimeter with two undercover inside to watch Krause. The plan was to have him signal them when he spotted The Collector. They would approach The Collector outside, arresting him before he ever made it into the coffee shop that Krause was sitting in. Simple enough.

"Hey? Hey guys?" Aram's hesitant voice came over their closed comm system. "Mr Reddington is not involved with this, right? No one told him or anything?"

Liz pushes a frustrated breath through her nose. "Why would we have?"

"I'm looked into their security cameras inside and Chuck is in line to get coffee."

"No way that's a coincidence," Ressler huffed.

"You think he'd try to take him?" Park asked.

Liz pursed her lips, frustration pulling at her. "Wouldn't be the first time. Captain Reynolds? We need to make sure that-"

"There's our signal," Reynolds said and Liz turned to see a man approaching. He fit the vague description of the former KGB officer that could have been The Collector. "Move in to-"

A gunshot rang out and the man dropped on the sidewalk.

Liz didn't wait as she sprang forward, even as others dove for cover. She knew who had taken that shot, even if his finger hadn't been on the trigger, and she wouldn't catch a bullet from the sniper.

The bullet had struck him in the chest, but hadn't killed him upon impact. He lay there, choking on his own blood as Liz skidded to his side on her knees. She reached forward, palms pressed against the wound uselessly. He didn't have long.

"Look at me," she demanded and his attention swiveled to her. "I know who you are. Why would someone try to kill you?"

He blinked heavily at her. "Don't know," he gasped, coughing hard and Liz winced as she felt the blood leaking through her fingers. "So many secrets."

"Only one. What secret would Raymond Reddington kill you for?" His eyes widened a little at that and Liz's narrowed. "Answer me. Please."

There was a long moment, sirens sounding in the distance, and she thought he would take the secret to his grave. Finally, he drew in one painful breath and loosed a single word on it: "Sikorsky."

And then he was gone.

--------

It had been a hell of a day. Metro PD had helped with corralling the civilians and they had been able to at least ID the name that The Collector had been living under: Michael Kowlaski, though it didn't take a lot of digging to find that that was an alias. Until Aram uncovered more, it was the name they had.

Liz had shared the word that Kowlaski had given her with his dying breath, and while it meant nothing to Ressler it clearly meant something to her. It was a blackmail file, she explained. One that her mother had been accused of stealing. Had she? She said she hadn't. She also said that Reddington knew who had and that he refused to give the name up to save her life. Looked like they had their motive, even if all they could really do about it was unleash Liz and let her see if she could get Reddington to reveal even the slightest piece of information that might be helpful.

He hadn't and she returned to the Post Office as Ressler was finishing up a call with Metro PD and half collapsed into the seat at her desk across from his. She looked exhausted. Worn. As he hung up the phone, he wrestled with if he should ask her again what had happened the night before that had bothered her so much.

"Tom's alive," his partner whispered from her place, her voice so quiet that he thought he'd misunderstood her at first.

"Come again?"

She cleared her throat. "Can you close the door?"

"Yeah." He stood, swiveling around to close the door behind him and turned back to find her staring at him. "Did you say that Tom's alive?"

Liz nodded tiredly. "Last night when my mother called… her people had found a man outside my apartment building. He'd planted a bug in her hotel room and had followed Simms to my place. They'd taken him to her and she was questioning him. When I got there…."

"Holy shit," Ressler breathed. "How?"

"I have… no idea. He doesn't remember me. He doesn't remember us or anything that…."

"But somehow he ended up after your mother? That's a hell of a coincidence."

"It can't be, no, but I have no idea what's going on. He said he was missing time and working for some woman. I don't know who and he didn't stick around long enough for me to really find out."

"He's gone?"

"Wouldn't you be if some woman you didn't know said that you'd had a life together?" She reached up, hands against her face and Ressler had no idea how to help her. "He ran. That's what he was good at… before me. He said he spent his whole life running, so he ran from me." She swallowed hard and tears started to build. "I don't even know where he -"

Ressler stood at that and circled their desks. Liz was on her feet in a second and latched around him. He pulled her in, at a loss. Wasn't this just their lives though? The most bizarre, horrible things happened to her. The last seven years of her life had been… what had she called it? A FEMA disaster of a life? That was about right. "Liz," he tried, hoping he was saying something that would help more than hurt. "We'll find him, if that's what you want. We can find him."

She pulled back. "I want to, but he doesn't know me. It's like he never met me. Even if we did find him, what good would it do?" She sniffed hard, running the heel of her hand under her eyes and she cleared her throat. "It's late. I need to go pick Agnes up."

He watched her as she circled around, grabbing her purse out of her desk drawer with practiced stoicity. "Liz, if you need anything…."

"I know," she cut him off. "Thank you. Just… Let's keep it between us for now?"

"Done."

She tried for a smile and started out the door, leaving Ressler standing in their office with the weight of the new knowledge barreling down on him.

--------

The storm outside fit her mood. It was everything Liz could do to plaster a smile on her face when she picked Agnes up and nod and uh-huh wow at all the right times as Agnes babbled on about her day in jumbled sentences and excited rambles. By the time they pulled into the garage at the apartment building thunder was rolling overhead and Liz was glad that, if nothing else, they could go straight from the garage up to the apartment and they wouldn't get drenched. It was the single saving grace of the entire day.

Dinner, bath time, and a story later, Agnes was finally in bed and the storm still raged on outside. Liz spoke to her mother briefly, filling her in, before she poured herself a glass of wine and slumped onto the couch. Part of her thought she'd start crying again, but she was too exhausted. Too spent to work up the emotional energy to do more than stare blankly towards the kitchen, which only held her gaze because it was in her direct line of sight.

Kowlaski could have led her to answers - for mother and then eventually for herself - but Reddington hadn't dared let her have that. When Cooper wouldn't hand him over he'd sent a man to shoot him dead in the street. Whatever the Sikorsky Archive really was he didn't want her anywhere near it. He didn't want her saving her mother's life. Even when people came back to her they left again. Tom didn't remember her and while Ressler had been sweet in offering to help her look for him it wouldn't matter anyway. If he didn't want to be found, he wouldn't be. He was gone. She'd never see him again, and if she couldn't find out who really stole the Archive, her mother wouldn't be far behind him.

A sharp knock at the front door made her jump and Liz drew a breath, surprised at how unsteady it was. She blinked hard, clearing tears that had somehow crept up on her despite the exhaustion, and started for the door. She tipped up on her toes to peek out of the peephole, eyes widening at the sight.

Liz stepped back and quickly undid the deadbolt, throwing the door open to see Tom standing there. He was drenched, eyes rimmed red like he'd been crying too, and he looked worn down and terrified. "I…. didn't know where else to go," he managed, voice trembling and rough. "Can I come in?"

She nodded, sure if she spoke she would wake up to find it was a dream. So instead she reached out and carefully took his hand. He didn't pull away, but let her guide him inside and close the door behind him. They stood there in the hallway for a long moment and he was shaking. "She lied to me."

"Who?" Liz managed, but he was still there after the world left her lips.

"Gina. She said she didn't know how, but she knew… She knew your name." He swallowed hard. "I don't know who to trust."

"Me," she breathed, holding his gaze. "You can trust me."

Tom nodded and suddenly he was folding into her, her arms wrapped around his neck. They stood there for a long moment, frozen in place. It felt real. Solid. His breath against her ear and the way that his fingers wrapped into the fabric of the back of her shirt. He choked on a sob and she whispered soft encouragements. She had him. He could trust her. He was safe.

Outside the storm raged on, but in their home she held onto him like she might never let go again.

--------

TBC

Notes: Well, at least you didn't have to wait as long as you usually do for the Keens to be reunited?

This is where we're really going to hit the ground running. I've always preferred a 'them against the world' approach with the Keens (and, really, any badass couple like them), so watch out, world. By the end of it, all the cards will be out on the table, but it'll be a hell of a ride getting there.

Next Time: Tom re-meets Agnes, the Keens track down some information, and Liz gets hit with by an unexpected emotional blow.

#the blacklist #Tom Keen #Elizabeth Keen #Donald Ressler #Raymond Reddington #Gina Zanetakos #Aram Mojtabai #Dembe Zuma

10 notes · View notes