#Cori better fuckin beg

[thepaintedlady00]

Saw this Avatar/Neytiri edit and realized it encompasses the vibes of Chapters 8 and 9 of Burden. So y'all get to suffer with me! 😅🥲

Tiktok Edit Link

#Fic: Burden #y'all ain't ready #i'm not ready #no one is ready #pain train #angst #dark!Daunt #Cori better fuckin beg

[theyearoftheking]

Book Twelve: Different Seasons

“The only reason anyone writes stories is so they can understand the past and get ready for some future mortality; that’s why all the verbs in stories have -ed endings...The only two useful artforms are religion and stories.” 

Guys... this is not an exaggeration/hyperbole/overreaction... Different Seasons is officially my current favorite Stephen King book. To hear Steve describe it, “...a book with stories in it about an off-beat prison-break, an old man and a young boy locked up in a gruesome relationship based on mutual parasitism, a quartet of country boys on a journey of discovery, and an off-the-wall horror story about a young woman determined to give birth to her child no matter what...” 

The first novella is Rita Hayworth and Shawshank Redemption; which of course the iconic movie is based off of. Despite the fact the narrator in the story is a white guy, I couldn’t help but hear Morgan Freeman’s voice. The movie holds pretty true to the story, but the extrapolations are all well done, and make for a more robust movie. 

The second novella is Apt Pupil; which was horrifying. I remember seeing the movie when it came out, and there was a particular scene where Todd makes Dussander dress up in a Nazi uniform and march around the kitchen for him. I remember getting actual chills during this scene. The book had the same effect. 

One fun thing about these novellas, they sometimes reference back to each other. At one point, Dussander tells Todd, “Stocks I picked up after the war under yet another name. Through a bank in the State of Maine, if you please. The banker who bought them for me went to jail for murdering his wife a year after I bought them...” Yes, that banker was Andy Dufresne from Shawshank Redemption.

There were a couple of notes I jotted down while reading Apt Pupil, “The only thing scarier than a Nazi who tortured and killed six million people, is a kid fascinated by him...” and “How well do we really know our own kids? Todd’s parents were convinced their son was smart, athletic, and a great kid. Meanwhile he was off killing vagrants, and helping his Nazi friend bury bodies in the basement.” Apt Pupil was my favorite novella in the collection, it was haunting, and the end was chilling... and unfortunately still relevant. 

The third novella was, The Body, better known as Stand by Me. 

Despite the fact the boys are on a mission to see a dead body, there really isn’t a whole lot of horror (psychological or otherwise) in the story. The most terrifying thing was the reference to Cujo, “Chopper was- at least until Joe Camber’s dog Cujo went rabid twenty years later- the most feared and least seen dog in Castle Rock.” Yep, the story is set in mythical Castle Rock. Which, while we’re on the subject, gets ridiculed, along with one of my favorite actual towns in Maine- Saco! “Lots of real towns sound stupid... I mean, what about Alfred, Maine? Or Saco, Maine? Or Jerusalem’s Lot? Or Castle-fuckin-Rock? There ain’t no castle here. Most town names are stupid...”

What the story lacks in horror, it makes up for in quality writing. There were paragraphs that made my heart squeeze a little. Maybe it’s because my daughter is almost the age of the boys in this story, and I know how formative these years are. Maybe it’s the nostalgia of the movie (wittle bitty Cory Feldman!). Or maybe it’s just recognizing beautiful writing when you read it. Either way. Take this gem, “The most important things lie too close to wherever your secret heart is buried, like landmarks to a treasure your enemies would love to steal away. And you may make revelations that cost you dearly only to have people look at you in a funny way, not understanding what you’ve said at all, or why you thought it was so important that you almost cried while you were saying it...When the secret stays locked within not for want of a teller but for want of an understanding ear.” 

In the afterward, Steve gives his iconic declaration that his work is the literary equivalent of a Big Mac. I beg to differ, friend. 

But the end of the story, “Me? I’m a writer now, like I said. A lot of critics think what I write is shit... I sold the book and it was made into a movie and the movie got good reviews and it was a smash hit besides... the second book was made into a movie as well, as was the third...Meantime, my wife doesn’t seem to mind having me around the house and we have three kids now...” I can’t help but wonder how much of this story is cribbed directly from Steve’s life. 

The final story in the collection is The Breathing Method, and it’s the weakest of the four. It’s a strange story about a woman who is decapitated on the way to the hospital to deliver her baby, and despite not having a head (or an intact spinal cord), she’s able to give birth, and then dies immediately after thanking the doctor for his help. It was stupid. But the glory of the three previous stories more than make up for this idiotic one. 

We had one Wisconsin reference in The Breathing Method, “It made me think for the first time in years of the winter nights in the Wisconsin farmhouse where I grew up...” 

We also had one Dark Tower reference in Shawshank Redemption: “Sometimes they have to be hauled down to the infirmary and sedated a couple of times before they got on the beam.” All things must serve The Beam! 

Total Wisconsin Mentions: 13

Total Dark Tower References: 8

Book Grade: A+

Rebecca’s Definitive Ranking of Stephen King Books

Different Seasons: A+

The Shining: A-

The Stand: A-

The Dead Zone: B+

‘Salem’s Lot: B+

Carrie: B+

Creepshow: B+

Danse Macabre: B-

The Gunslinger

Firestarter: C+

Cujo: C-

Nightshift: C-

Next up is Christine, another book I’ve never read before. I have the distinct pleasure of driving to and staying over in Iowa this week, so I hope to finish it quickly. Hoping the book is more interesting than the entire state of Iowa...

Until next time readers, Long Days & Pleasant Nights,

Rebecca

[unpopcorned]

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                          I think I’m losing my mind                                                       Trying to stay inside the lines

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The phone rings and keeps ringing until it stops. Machine answers, familiar voice next. Jonah sighs. 

From behind him, Jax asks, “Got anything?” 

Jonah looks up, even through the shoddy, fingerprint-covered mess of the phone-booth’s glass, he can make out the mess of blonde curls and bright eyes. Jax is bouncing in place, impatient and glancing over his shoulder every couple seconds.

Jonah decides to hang up the phone, letting it clatter and dangle on the hook. Such an old thing, there’s grime caking the numbers. A light drizzle greets him when he leaves the phone-booth, he doesn’t bother lifting his hood, glancing up towards the darkening clouds. 

There’s no stars out tonight, if it weren’t for the neon pink lights of CRUISIN’ shining down on them, there would be no way to see at all. 

“Nah,” Jonah says, sighs again. It’s all he seems to be doing as of late. “They must not be back yet.” 

“Yeah,” Jax hesitates, “Wanna go back inside?” 

“Sure.” 

Jonah wishes he could calm his nerves, Jax goes out of his way to throw his arm out and wrap it around his shoulders, like he’s trying to make Jonah feel better. He appreciates it, leans into his side gradually. 

It’s the weekend, so it’s not like CRUISIN’ is missing any patronage. The place is filled to the brim with people. Usually, the locals come  —  mainly teenagers or twenty-somethings, rent their skates, order a few drinks, or try their hand at the old-as-dirt arcade games. Dark purple casts all over the room, save for the flashing neon every other moment. Jax seems as if he’s right in his element, and Jonah can’t wait to leave. 

Don’t get him wrong, he’d offered to come. It’s usual for business. And Gus works here, so Asher and Tate and Fitz get in free. Jonah has always been a homebody, even more so over the last couple days, burying himself in his studies. Jax had been the one to force him out of the house, practically tugging on his arm to pull him off the couch. 

“Look, there’s V!” Jax has to shout in Jonah’s ear to be heard over the loud bass of the speakers, shaking the walls each time the tempo speeds up, “She looks pissed.” 

Yeah, she does. When they get closer, Jonah is able to see she’s talking to someone, almost spitting her words, eyes narrowed and mouth deep-set. It’s Melody, who’s rolling her eyes and shifting her weight onto one foot. Of course, she’d be the only one brave enough to go toe-to-toe with Veronica. 

“--told you we’re not taking anymore of that shit. Some kid OD’d in the fucking bathroom last month,” Melody is saying, eyebrows creased, “No more laced shit, got it?” 

“Maybe you should be more careful,” Veronica replies, flippant and annoyed, “Stop sellin’ to kids. Ever thought of that?” 

“They’re most of our customers, in case you haven’t noticed,” Melody leans closer, “And we don’t sell to them unless they’re over fifteen.” 

Veronica scoffs, “Yeah, real fuckin’ smart--” 

“Hey, hey,” Jax breaks in, leaving Jonah’s side to try and simmer the flames between the two girls, “What did Rob say? No fightin’ before he got here.” 

Veronica rolls her eyes, Melody backs off. With a flip of her blonde hair  -  never mind that she almost smacks Veronica in the face with it  -  she turns on her heels, “I’ll go let Mr. A know you’re here.” Her voice is very sing-songy, the exact opposite of before, sarcastic twist to her lips.

Veronica is left staring after her, Jonah can’t help but think Veronica’s eyes could burn a hole into someone’s head or scare Death himself if she tried hard enough. She could be really scary when she wanted to be. 

She looks to Jonah and Jax next, eyebrows lifting faintly. “You talk to ‘em?” 

“Nobody answered,” Jonah shrugs his shoulders, his voice might sound a little more down than usual. He adds, unsure, “What if something happened?” 

Veronica makes a face at him, “Oh, Christ. Don’t do that. Don’t do that - worried thing. Trust me, I know better outta anybody, those idiots can take care of themselves.” 

A couple of teenagers skate past them, full of laughter and shouting. It’s hard to make out any faces in the limited lighting, though. Veronica is always on edge, even more so without a certain someone by her side, clicking her teeth out of annoyance. 

“Great. Just fuckin’ great. So I gotta deal with these assholes on my own, huh?”

“Don’t worry, you got us!” Jax pulls Jonah closer by the shoulders again, Jonah is able to get a whiff of light sweat and hairspray, “We’re behind you one-hundred-percent, V!” 

“Shut up.” 

“C’mon, V, don’t be so--ow!” 

She swats at his arm before he can rope her into the one-armed hug, just as Jonah. Jonah only watches the two of them bicker for a second or two before William is joining them, in his usual skates and rainbow hoodie, gesturing all over the place once he’s close enough. 

“Yo, ya’ll hear them tunes? Fuckin’ with my whole vibe out here, man,” William’s complaining, readjusting his glasses, “Weak, I’m tellin’ you. My cousin runs a side hustle, could’ve totally hooked Mr. A with some sick--” 

“Hey,” Veronica isn’t in the mood, she still has a tight grip on Jax’s wrist and is twisting it little by little, “Pay attention. Focus. I don’t have time for--” 

“I’m focused, V,” William breaks in, all smiles now, even with her crass attitude, “Don’t be mad, mami. Y’know I got your back when Jay ain’t here.” 

Veronica lets go of Jax when he begins whining, curling himself backwards behind Jonah as some type of shield, “That’s what bothers me.” 

Jonah feels like sighing again. Maybe he shouldn’t have come after all. And of course, William notices, leaning closer to him when Veronica attention is diverted. He picks up his eyebrows, purses his lips in that annoying and cute way of his, practically begging Jonah to spill with his expression alone. 

Jonah almost smiles. Almost. “Just worried.” 

“Don’t be, man,” William says, like it’s so easy, “I got you.” He nudges his elbow into Jonah’s side, encouraging in his own way. 

Veronica is the first to move towards the concession area when something catches her eye, and they’re all forced to follow. Jonah’s steps are shuffling and slow, glancing towards the EXIT sign every few seconds, as if he expects something. Constance is running the concession stand tonight  ---  mainly the place to trade your money in for tickets or to get a cheap snack. Among other things. 

Sabryna is there too, seated in the corner, flipping a magazine and feet propped up. She barley looks up when two teenagers approach the stand, patting their pockets and looking nervous. Constance notices them, blows a big fat bubble in their faces when they hand over a wad of cash. 

Sucking it in thereafter, she squares them both with a sharp look, “How old’re you, kid?” 

The first boy withers under her stare, “F-Fifteen.” 

“Mhm,” she blows another bubble, pressing a few buttons on the register so it falls open, tossing the money inside and handing over his change. Once she’s finished, Constance slides across a baggy, “Careful with this, got it?”

The two teenagers nod, run off with their purchase. Constance can only shake her head, attention shifting when she notices Veronica out of the corner of her eye. Marginally, her expression becomes less hostile, weight leaning against the counter.

“Hey, Veronica,” She draws out her name, that only makes Veronica cross her arms over her chest, “Where’s your boy-toy?” 

“Ha,” Veronica says, “How much’re you sellin’ that shit for?” 

“Don’t worry, we’re not dubbing your prices,” Constance says, not at all offended, “Mr. A actually wanted to go higher.” 

“You’re supposed to be talkin’ to him today, right?” Sabryna asks from the corner, looking up from her magazine briefly, “He’s in a bad mood.” 

Constance nods, “Definitely.” 

Veronica’s nose wrinkles up, “Fuck’s he gotta be upset for? Stickin’ my neck out far ‘nough for the guy.” 

“Bet’cha you won’t say it to his face,” Sabryna sing-songs, snorting, “White girls all bark and no bite.” 

“‘Ey, don’t be talkin’ about my girl V like that,” William says, leaning far over the counter to frown at Sabryna, which she only sticks her tongue out at, “Got bigger balls than yo’ mans.”

Sabryna flips him off, Constance looks tempted to laugh. 

“I’m here, I’m here!” Cory burst in, wet curls from the rain, shaking it out and causing Sabryna to squeal and jump from her seat, ducking out through the way he came. Constance grimaces at him, but puts up no fuss, “Sorry, I’m late. All the talking literally kills me.” 

“Break up with him, then,” Constances tells him, twirling her gum around and around her index finger, “You have the patience of a saint.” 

“I hate being single,” Cory is whining while he bends down behind the counter, plucking up a crate and setting it atop. He doesn’t get a chance to rifle through it, however, his attention is on Jonah, even though he’s been quiet throughout, “Jonah! You look cute today.” 

Jonah blinks, looks down at himself. He was rushed out of the house, so he’s not wearing anything particularly special. One of Vito’s hoodies, some old jeans and sneakers. But still, he says, “Thanks.” 

Cory balances his chin into his hand, ignoring the look William is giving him, eyes set on Jonah, “Are you seeing anyone? Please say no.” 

“The answer is always the same,” William grouses, “Don’t know why yo’ass keeps--” 

“I’m seeing someone,” Jonah says, goodnaturedly, almost looks apologetic when Cory’s expression crumbles, always melodramatic, “Sorry.” 

“Geez. You never make time for me.” 

“I’m sorry.” 

William is still going, “You not his type anyway--” 

“Hey,” Constance says, “You’re scaring off my customers,” She’s pointing past them, where a threesome has stopped to linger by the stand, appearing anxious to step any closer, “Flirt somewhere else.” 

“I’m not some errand girl,” Veronica looks annoyed again, her arms tight across her chest, jaw locked, “Mr. A wants to see me, needs to make time. I ain’t waitin’ around for anybody.” 

“Melody will come get you when he’s ready,” Constance is quick to reassure after she finishes with her customers. Cory holds out the tip jar, the metallic sound of coins hitting the bottom of the glass, “Relax, Veronica.” 

“Yeah, your vibe is totally killing the mood,” Cory purses his lips, “Wanna freebie?” 

“Do I want the shit I just sold you?” Veronica sneers, “No.” With that, she turns and walks away, Jonah doesn’t hesitate to follow after her. William only stays to poke more fun at Cory, Jax eager to take up the freebie offer. 

The music is able to drown out mostly everything, but Jonah can hear Veronica mumbling beneath her breath, shoulders lifted up to her ears defensively, even more tense than her usual self. She half-turns to Jonah, eyes scanning the crowd, “You sure nobody answered? Did it just - go to voicemail or somethin’?” 

Jonah’s stomach is twisting, expression falling by only a small degree. He tries his best to keep his expression in check, “They’re usually back within a couple days, right?” 

Veronica shrugs, “Depends. Rudy can be a real fuckin’ asshole when no one’s keepin’ him in check.” 

“He’s . . . something.” 

“Always talkin’.” 

“It never stops.” 

“For such a big guy, you’d think he’d know when to shut the fuck up. Nah, he’s like one of those . . . yappin’ dogs.” 

Jonah smiles at her, withdrawn but still there, “It’s hard not to love him.” 

“Yeah,” Veronica’s only quiet for a small moment, “He’s still an asshole. Don’t know why Vito puts up with him. ‘Specially after all the shit.” 

Ah, yeah. Maybe Jonah’s heart can just be a bit too big sometimes, but he was never angry with Rudy, not for that. Understands his reaction in a way, because he’s had it happened to him before. The anger and confusion that comes with it. Sometimes, he worries for Vito even more than he lets on, with his family and friends and peers, people who could look at him differently just because Jonah remains beside him. 

He shoots Veronica another smile, grabbing a hold of the rink’s railing and leaning back a little, “Rudy’s a lovable sort of guy.” 

“Don’t let him hear you say that.”

Jonah didn’t say that. Neither did Veronica. 

She’s the first to turn towards the sound of the voice, but arms slip around her waist, pulling her back and she’s quick to melt into the embrace. Even so, she puts forth her most grumpy voice when she says, “What took you so long, asshole? Gonna give me a fuckin’ heart attack.” 

“Aw, Ron,” Jacob rests his chin on her shoulder, pressing his nose into the curve of her jaw, kissing there, “Didn’t know you cared so much.” 

“Fuck you. Jonah called your place and you didn’t answer.” 

“Just got back.” 

Veronica tilts her head a bit, “Somethin’ happen?” To which Jacob whispers something in her ear, Jonah is unable to make out through the music and limited lights. Veronica nods though and rubs his wrist. 

But if Jacob is here, that means --- 

“Where’s Vito?” Jonah can’t help but ask, lighting up at just the thought, “Is he here? Did he come with you?” 

Jacob seems amused with his excitement, tightening his arms around Veronica and rocking the two of them lightly. With one finger, he points over the way, past the rink and the crowd of teenagers strapping on their skates, “Yeah. He was lookin’ for you, back over there.” 

Jonah is polite enough to excuse himself at least, but it comes out pretty rushed. He speed-walks in the direction Jacob said, shouldering his way past others, mumbling apologies when he’s given dirty looks. It doesn’t take long to find Vito in the crowd, though  ---  he’s taller than most, appears completely out of place. He spots Jonah coming and they meet halfway, Jonah throwing his arms around him once he’s close enough. 

They talk at the same time. 

“I’m sorry--” 

“I was so worried--” 

Vito stops, “You--” 

“No, you first.” 

He fumbles with his words for a second or two, before he leans down and kisses Jonah. And Jonah is quick to oblige, hands lifting to cradle his face, pulling him in deeper. Music seems to dull, people disappear, all he can focus on is Vito in moments like these. It feels like coming home, every time, welcomed by his scent and voice and touch. 

“I’m sorry,” Vito says again when they part, pressing one more kiss to the corner of Jonah’s mouth, “Sorry, Jonah.” 

“It’s okay, I’m just happy to see you,” he says, he threads fingers through Vito’s hair, it’s getting longer than usual and a bit damp from the rain, “You said you’d be back yesterday and I just--” Vito kisses him again, gentle as ever, “I missed you.” 

“I thought you’d be mad at me.” 

Jonah blinks, incredulous sort of smile on his lips, “Why would I be mad?” 

“’Cause,” Vito backs up some, maybe only an inch or two between them, but Jonah keeps a tight grip on his shoulders, feeling them tense underneath his fingers, “The whole...Texas thing. When you went to get your award and those professors were bein’ so - that fuckin’ word you used---” 

“Supercilious.” 

“Yeah, bein’ fuckin’ assholes to you. The whole time. I didn’t mean--” 

“That’s why you left with Manuel after we got back?” Jonah had wondered if things felt off, but hadn’t thought anything of the trip. He doesn’t blame Vito for being defensive and hostile around people who think they’re smarter and better than others, it was kind of hard to keep reminding even himself of that. “I thought you were mad at me. ‘Cause I made you come with--” 

Vito’s eyes are wide now, disbelief visible on his face, “No. No, Jonah. Shit. Fuckin’ - sorry. I didn’t think--” This time, Jonah kisses him quiet, a soft press of his lips, reassuring in every way possible. 

Unfortunately, Jax had went out of his way to come and find them, clearing his throat loudly to gain their attention. Jonah can only turn his head, flashing a quick smile, relieved, “Vito’s here.” 

“I can see that,” Jax says, greeting Vito softly, which Vito ignores for whatever reason, “Veronica’s leaving with Jay.” 

Jonah pulls away from his boyfriend, but Vito’s arms keep tight around his waist, unwilling to let him go fully, “Why? What happened?” 

Jax shrugs one shoulder, appearing nervous, “Said they had somethin’ to take care of. Looked pretty important, I think.” 

Vito snorts into Jonah’s ear, “Sure.” 

Jonah occupies himself by playing with Vito’s fingers, noting the caked grease underneath the nails, can’t help but wonder just what he’d done while he was gone. But he won’t ask, he allows Vito to slowly open up whenever he prefers. It works better that way than to ask the endless amount of questions that pop into Jonah’s head at random. Tenderly, he kisses the knuckles of Vito’s hand, right on the scar there that stretches a few inches  -  perhaps from an accident or a fight. 

“Rob should be here any minute,” Jax blabbers, he ducks his head whenever he meets Vito’s eye for too long  -  Jonah gives them both a confused glance, “He’s gonna talk to Mr. A for us.” 

Jonah suggests, “We can just ask Tripp--”

“Don’t think so,” The blond shakes his head fast, stringy blond curls everywhere with each movement, “Rob and Tripp had a fight.” 

“When?” 

“Couple days ago. I don’t think they’re talkin’.” 

“Great,” Vito huffs again, shifting one hand into his pocket and letting Jonah hold the other, “Just great.” 

“Okay,” Jonah’s tone is subdued, thinking, “Okay, we’ll just wait then.” 

And they do wait. Turns out Jax was right: Rob is in a horrible mood about something and it shows. His shoulders are hunched in, he doesn’t look like he’s slept, and he glares whenever one of them speak. William is the only one who can’t take a hint, he keeps talking, even when Rob disappears into Mr. A’s office without a word. 

“What the fuck is up with him?” William complains, irritated, “Would rather deal wit’ V if he gonna be like that. Fuck ‘im.” 

“He’s goin’ through some stuff,” In the short amount of time, Jax has managed to acquire a slurpee, sucking at the straw eagerly, “Go easy on him.” 

“I’ll kick his ass.” 

“William,” Jonah scolds, but it holds no scorn, William merely grins at him, “Don’t be a jerk.” 

“You’re in a better mood,” William ignores him, using his chin to gesture towards Vito, who’s standing off to the side but never too far away from Jonah, “Boyfriend come t’save the day?” 

Jonah glances over in his direction, and then back to William, lowering his voice. “I don’t like when he goes on ‘jobs’ with Rudy.” 

William looks curious, interested. 

“He’s . . . difficult. Vito complains about it all the time.” 

“Maybe Vito should stop doin’ ‘jobs’ then.” 

Jonah sets his jaw, one more look taken towards Vito. This time, Vito catches him staring and smiles a little. Even with the limited lighting, Jonah is able to make out the different browns and hazels in his eyes, “Maybe.” 

But then he thinks of Felicity, her offer, her price. He’s not short on money or anything, but . . . the things he could learn. His mother had always told him he was a lot like his father, always grabbing for any information he could get, here or there. Compared them often to Hungry-Hungry Hippos, they’d stay up all night reading and stretching out maps and researching whatever suddenly interested the two of them. 

Jonah wants to learn more, wants to be more. He’s good at what he does, wishes other people could see it. Not Veronica and Rob’s loose change, but something else. 

He shakes his head to himself, he shouldn’t think like that. Ever. Vito had already told him his concerns, cast the idea aside like it was nothing, fiercely protective when he has no reason to be. He supposes he can see his side, given the recent circumstances and difficulties of this business, but Jonah himself never puts up a fuss when Vito has to suddenly leave, or when Veronica takes him out in the middle of the night for ‘something’, or when he’s gone for days on end without an update. 

He worries, a lot. And he’s painstakingly lonely when he’s away. Which seems to be more often, ever since word of Dex being back in town flooded. 

"What’re you guys doing here?” It’s a new voice, but familiar. Sydney stands to the side, Falen next to him, both looking thoroughly confused to see them all. “Can you not take a hint?” 

William is already pushed off the wall before anyone can say anything, “Chill the fuck out, white boy. Just here to see your boss--” 

Sydney looks pretty pissed, and menacing. Even in his light-up skates and sweater with a giant heart on the front, “Good. Maybe he can finally tell you the news.” 

Jonah blinks, “News?” 

“We’re not dealing with Veronica or Rob anymore,” Falen says, there’s a Blow-Pop in her hand that she uses to gesture towards the group, “After what happened.” 

“What happened?” 

Sydney shrugs, looks the least bit intimidated with Vito stepping closer and William glaring at him, “After he says whatever to Rob, you guys can screw off.” 

“What’s that su--” 

“Sorry,” Falen continues, sympathetic tilt to her eyebrows as she walks past them, “Not personal.” 

“Totally personal,” Sydney follows behind her, ignoring William when he flips him off, “Broke Tripp’s heart. Not cool.” 

“Wha--” 

They’re gone after that, and Jonah is left staring after them. He looks to Jax for help, who’s been noticeably silent throughout, but he just seems uncomfortable and out of place. 

“What was that about?” 

William is still frowning, deep and unpleasant lines set to his face, “Yeah, fuck’s up with ‘em?” 

“Maybe it’s worse than I thought,” Jax mumbles, barely heard over the music, “I don’t--” 

Rob comes out of Mr. A’s office. He appears even worse than before, thin layer of sweat over his face and staring off into space, stumbling past them without saying anything, again. Jonah is only still for a few seconds before he’s taking Vito’s hand again, jogging lightly behind Rob to catch up. The others soon follow. 

“Rob?” Jonah tries, “What happened?” 

“Nothing,” Rob says over his shoulder, voice low, “We gotta go.” 

“Why? What happened--” 

“Gotta meet with somebody.” 

“ . . . okay? Who?” 

“Yeah, thought this was gonna be an hour thing, Rob--” 

“What did Mr. A say?” 

“Is everything alright?” 

“Just--” Rob’s voice raises an octave. They’re outside now, the sky is pitchblack and it’s almost eerily quiet, besides the music from CRUISIN’. Rob’s face is pink, he’s biting at his bottom lip hard before he speaks, “We can’t come here anymore. Gonna do this last thing for him then . . . that’s it.” 

Jonah’s forehead has crumbled, concern etched onto his expression, “What happened? Is this about Tripp?” 

“No,” Rob laughs - it sounds frustrated and not at all humorous, like he’s laughing at himself and the ridiculous situation, “No. It’s - it’s me. Let’s just . . . go. Okay?” 

Vito and Jonah exchange a look. But the others are falling right into step with Rob, loading into his car. Vito keeps a tight grip on Jonah’s hand, lightly pulling him back to him, eyeing Rob’s back, “We should go home.” 

Jonah smiles some, just a slight tilt of his lips, “Yeah. After this, okay?” 

Vito shakes his head, “Better if we don’t get involved.” 

“It’s Rob, Vito. Plus . . . he looks really upset.” 

“I--” Vito looks like he’s struggling to say what he really means, anxious and tense, “When I was gone, all I could think about was comin’ back to you. I wanna go home, together. Not have to worry ‘bout shit like this, yanno?” 

Silent, Jonah just holds Vito’s hand in his, stroking. He can see the stress and exhaustion in his face, and he knows words are difficult things for him, spreading himself so thin when there’s nothing left to give. Jonah wishes he could say something to comfort him, give him a calmer mind and a softer place to relax. 

But--

“You guys comin’?” Rob yells from his truck, peeking his head out only for a second, “C’mon, let’s go.” 

Jonah visibly hesitates, one look taken to Vito’s face. It’s enough to make his boyfriend melt, just by a bit, blowing out of a breath like it takes everything in him to agree. But he does, and that’s what matters. Perhaps, Jonah’s a bit too thoughtful, considerate and caring when it comes to his friends, especially when they seem so at odds, typically the glue within the group and doing his very best keep everyone together and tempers somber. 

There’s no more room in Rob’s ride, so Jonah goes with Vito, buckling in as soon as he’s inside, the familiar smell of cigarettes and pristine leather. There’s not much talking as the two of them tail Rob, Jonah fiddling with the radio until he finds something suitable, a soft and amicable song that Jonah somehow can’t remember the name of. 

It’s a long drive, Vito readjusting the heat when Jonah shivers, one hand on his thigh and rubbing soothing circles into the knee. Which Vito seems to do a lot lately, like he needs to be sure that he’s there and solid. Jonah doesn’t mind, sometimes he needs a reminder too. The smell of seawater is strong when they part near a truck-crossing bridge, right next to the shipping ports a few miles up the road. 

Even in the darkness, the shapes and shadows of William and Jax are easy to see as they get out of the car. Jonah looks to Vito, sheepish, “Sorry for making you come out so late.” His tone sounds suggestive, like he’s trying to say Vito is free to go if he’s too tired from his day. To which Vito picks up on easily, eyebrows pinching together and lips pressed tight. 

“Not leavin’ you here, Jonah.” 

“I know.” 

“I don’t like--” He makes a vague gesture with his hand at the windshield, towards Rob’s truck, “I don’t trust them.” 

“It’s Rob, Vito,” he repeats himself from earlier, beseeching, wishing he could see his friends how Jonah does, “Nothing’s going to happen.” 

“It’s not just him,” Vito says, “The other one, too.” 

Jonah finds himself befuddled, once again glancing up to see Jax is closer to Vito’s car, hands in pockets and rocking on his feet, constantly moving. He’s waiting for them, meets Jonah’s eyes briefly and flashes a smile. Jonah looks back to Vito, “I don’t get it.” 

“Just keep an eye on him,” Vito’s voice is serious, locking eyes with Jonah quick, searching, “Alright? For me.” 

Jonah nods before he can think about it, reaching across and taking Vito’s hand in his again. It seems to help, Vito’s shoulders kind of relax, he sighs and reaches over to switch off the car and pocket his keys. With one more shared glance, the two of them leave the car. 

It’s bitterly cold from the rain earlier, and being right on the water isn’t helping. Jonah burrows deeper into his hoodie, leaning closer into Vito for some type of warmth. Which, Vito isn’t shy with sharing, he wraps his arms briefly around him, chin on the crown of Jonah’s head. 

“You two are fuckin’ worse than V and Jay,” William complains once they’re in view, he looks pretty pissed, Jonah can only wonder what argument had transpired inside of the truck. He doesn’t keep his attention on them though, he turns halfway to look at Rob, “Hey, gonna say anythin’? Could use an update, over here freezin’ our asses off.”

“Do you always have to talk so much?” Rob snaps, it makes Jonah blink in surprise at his tone, “Had to listen to it the whole fucking ride.” 

“Well, excuse me,” William says, “I came out for V, not you. Didn’t want to be riding for this shit no way.” 

“Then follow Veronica,” Rob turns to face him, eyes narrowed tight, “See if I give a shit!” Gaze flickers over to Jonah fast, accusing, “You, too? You wanna go too?” 

At first, Jonah doesn’t have much to say. The sudden shift in Rob is startling to see, he’s almost unrecognizable, cold in the eyes. Jonah’s pretty sure he’d seen it once before, awhile ago maybe. He holds up his hands in surrender, still tucked half-way behind Vito, “It’s cool, Rob. I’m not leaving.” 

“Yeah, just chill out,” Jax pleads, nervously rocking again, shoulders up to his ears, “You’re freakin’ me out, man.” 

“What the fuck is up with you?” William isn’t backing down, never really does, he spits his words, a diluted cloud hovers around his mouth each time he speaks, “Don’t take your shit out on us.” 

“It’s--” Rob throws his arms out suddenly in Vito’s direction, gesturing to him like he’s an annoying fly that he can’t get rid of, “Why’re we workin’ with them?” 

“What?” William and Jax share a confused glance with each other, “Fuck’re you talkin’ about?” 

“Italians,” Rob supplies, “Since when do we work with them?” 

Vito has kind of tensed from beside Jonah, jaw locks with an audible click. Jonah nudges his shoulder into his, just slightly. 

“‘Cause of V,” William talks slow, like he’s explaining it all to a child, “She’s dating Jay--” 

“So we’re all dating fucking Jay?” Rob blusters, “Things were just fine without all this shit--” 

“V knows what she’s doin’--” 

“Does she? Seems like she’s got into nothing but shit since--” 

“Rob--”

“Let’s all just calm--” 

“Don’t tell me to fucking calm down right now!” 

“Okay, fuck this, I’m leavin’--” 

Click.

They stop at the noise, somehow deafening in the midst of their argument. Maybe because they all know what a gun sounds like, even in a moment like this. Tentatively, Jonah turns his head, towards where it came from, heart stopping in his chest. 

Jax is as still as ever, muzzle of the pistol pressed against the back of his head, bottom lip trembling and eyes big. There’s a stranger behind him, a man Jonah’s never seen before, but from one glance at Rob’s face, Jonah can tell that he knows him. William almost jumps out of his skin when he turns around, Rob hasn’t moved, Jonah wants to take Vito’s hand but he’s not really able to get his body to work, cold sweat breaking and nerves heightened. 

“What the fuck,” William mutters, shuffling a step backward - he was the closest to Jax, after all, “What the fuck, what the fuck.” 

“Nobody move!” The guy is about as tall as Vito, just more gangly, long legs and arms, eyes darting over their faces, one after the other. His gun presses harder to Jax’s head, nudging and insistent, urging him forward. Jax does just that, stumbling over his own two feet, but somehow managing to keep upright, “Nobody move...” 

It’s quiet, but Jonah’s heart is racing a mile a minute, in his ears so loudly that he’s afraid Vito will be able to hear it. The glint of the gun in the limited street lights brings back memories, some that he’s tried painfully hard to forget over the years. 

No one’s able to really get anything out, William’s mouth moves uselessly, opening and closing, searching for words, until Rob speaks up, “Rench,” he says, hands lifted from his sides and held out like he’s trying not to spook him, “what’re you doing?” 

“You know him?” William balks, throwing a panicked look over at Rob. 

“Rench,” Rob says again, ignoring William pointedly, “Put the gun d--” 

“No, he doesn’t know me,” Rench, Jonah is guessing that’s his name, growls, aiming his gun wildly towards Rob, gesticulating with it in violent motions, causing William to curse, “You don’t know me! Step the fuck back!” 

“From the garage,” Rob finally supplies, he’s not moving towards him anymore, “You work with Nico and Theo. We met once through--” 

“I only know Tripp!” Rench keeps going, “Only him! I only deal with him!” 

“And we understand that--” 

“Shut up!” 

“But I--” 

“Rob,” William mumbles, and it only makes Rob glare at him again, “Shut the fuck up.”

“Mr. A sent us.” 

“Don’t fucking lie to me!” Rench is yelling, flushed in the face, speaking through his teeth, “You think I don’t know? You think I don’t see what kinda shit you’re in? Huh?” 

William’s brow crumbles in confusion, “What--” 

“I said shut up!” 

“Chill the fuck out!” 

“Rench!” 

Jonah’s eyes have flickered between the gun, Vito’s back, and Jax’s expression. The blond has stopped struggling, seemingly limp as Rench wraps an arm around his throat and tugs him backwards, gun pressed to his temple. Jax’s face is sort of blank, eyes far-off, Jonah’s worried that he’s gone into shock of some kind. That thought in mind, he reaches for Vito’s sleeve to tug at it. The movement catches Rench’s attention, who spins halfway and jerks the muzzle of the gun in their direction, specifically at Jonah. 

“I told you not to fucking move!” 

“Watch where you’re pointin’ that shit!” Vito’s voice is cutting, he moves halfway in front of Jonah, as if he’s fully prepared to take a bullet. Jonah, growing desperate, grabs at Vito’s hand, pulls in a futile effort to bring him closer  -  it doesn’t do much.

“Vito,” Jonah whispers, “Vito, don’t--” 

“Hold on,” Rench blinks several times, slightly off-putting, leaning around Vito awkwardly with Jax still plastered to his chest, “Hold on, hold up. I remember you.” 

Jonah finds himself blinking too, stopped short by his words. His fingers fall away from Vito, heart in his throat, “...me?” 

“Yeah. Yeah, fucking you. I’ve seen you.”

“Fuck you,” Vito spits, “Put the fuckin’ gun do--” 

Jonah is still staring, keeps glancing at Jax, “I don’t think so.” 

“You were there. With V and my brother.” 

“Your...”

Rench’s jaw clenches tight, a muscle in his cheek jumps, “My brother.” 

“Alex,” Rob says, hands falling back to his sides, breathing out deeply like he’s come to some sudden realization the rest of them haven’t, “You’re  -  fuck, I forgot--” 

“Rape-y Alex?” William’s voice is high with his confusion, “You’re fuckin’ Alex’s brother?” 

That’s enough to drive Rench into action again, his face screws up, flushed and pinched, and in that moment - Jonah can see Alex through him. The sandy curls, the light freckles, the same noses even. Kind of makes sense, you don’t get into this business without family, really. He looks as if he doesn’t know whether to keep the gun trained on Jonah or smash it against the side of Jax’s head, he jumps between the two motions hastily and unsteadily. Jax barely reacts. 

William is shooting glances from Jonah to Rob, as if he’s trying to communicate something he can’t get out properly, “Put the fucking gun down, man. Nobody’s seen Alex in months!” 

“I saw him!” Rench thunders, his pistol jerks towards Jonah again, Vito hasn’t moved from his spot, and Jonah’s too stunned to try and tell him to move again. He tries to think over the amount of time since he’s last seen Alex, his mind and thoughts racing like his heart, “I saw him with you!” He says it directly to Jonah, eyes fierce and guarded, “With you!”

It all comes back to Jonah in a nauseating wave - he’d volunteered to go and see Alex with Veronica, free from class for the day, and it’d been a usual : the two of them going back and forth, Alex making an inappropriate joke that made Veronica’s nose wrinkle up. The garage had reeked of gasoline and oil, Nico had been dismissive with the three of them, Theo greeting Veronica like they were longtime friends, and Rench had been there. Even though Jonah hadn;t known him at the time, he’d been there and Alex had hugged him, pulled him to the side to tell him something. Rench, paranoid as ever, kept glancing over in Veronica and Jonah’s direction even as Alex tried to reassure him it was fine. That was the last time Jonah met with Alex, and he hadn’t even considered why. With a chilling realization, he looks towards Vito, lost. 

Vito doesn’t meet his eyes. 

There’s a bunch of yelling, William is pointing at Rench aggressively, left only to bargaining for Jax’s life now. Rob is telling William to shut up over and over again, growing in volume and intensity every time. Vito is the only one quiet, tense in front of Jonah, eyes trained solely on the pistol. And Rench is cursing at them all, spitting his words. He knows, he can read it in all of their faces. 

Alex is gone. 

“Shut up, William! Shut the fuck up for once, would you?” Rob yells, throwing his hands towards him in frustration, “Don’t you know how t--” 

“This is your fuckin’ fault!” William growls back, gesticulating towards Jax frantically, “You’re gonna get us fuckin’ killed ‘cause of your shit!” 

“My fault?” 

“Yeah! You, Tripp! All of your--” 

“I--” Jonah’s voice cuts through it all, Vito’s shoulders straighten when he steps from behind him, hands held in a placating manner towards Rench, like he’s a bird threatening to take flight. Vito makes a grab for Jonah’s arm to pull him back, but Jonah doesn’t let him, he keeps his eyes locked with Rench’s, “Can you let Jax go? Please.” 

Jax, oddly enough, still hasn’t moved. He looks almost dead in Rench’s arms, and Jonah would’ve thought so if Jax wasn’t blinking every so often. Rench can feel his lack of reaction, he keeps squeezing his bicep tight against Jax’s throat, but it doesn’t really do anything. 

“Where’s my brother?” Rench’s voice breaks towards the end, it’s raw from screaming, “What did you fucking do to him?” 

William and Rob have gone quiet, Jonah can feel their stares digging into him. Vito is the hardest not to look at in this moment, especially as Jonah keeps shuffling steps closer, head of the gun aimed at his chest, trembling in Rench’s grasp. 

“Can you just--” Jonah’s breath catches and comes out as a sudden rush, “Can you please let Jax go first. I’ll tell you whatever.” But he had nothing, lying tasted bitter on the tip of his tongue, “Just let Jax go.”

“Fuck you. I’m gonna blow his fucking brains out.” 

“Jonah,” Vito’s voice is desperate, just less than a foot away, “What’re you--”

“Don’t do that,” Panic rises in Jonah’s throat like bile, “I don’t know what happened to A-Alex, but killing Jax isn’t going to--” 

“Isn’t gonna what?” Rench doesn’t even need him to finish, spittle flies from his lips, “What! Say it! Isn’t gonna bring him back, right? Because you fucking killed him!”

Jonah wants to flinch under the bite of the words. But he finds himself staring at the tip of Rench’s gun, aimed at him, cocked. His eyes are twitching, he looks like he’s in pain, furious and demanding. After that, things kind of happen in a blur - and a lot happens. Vito grabs a hold of Jonah’s arm and yanks, William yells something, Rench clenches his finger around the trigger. 

The gunshot that rings out doesn’t come from him though. It comes from Rob. 

Jonah hates that he sees every second of it. In the movies, they make it seem as if it happens so fast, but it doesn’t. A cruel lie. Because Jonah sees the wide-eyed shock on Rench’s face, the bullet lodging into his cheek, the sheer impact enough to make him stumble back. He releases his hold on Jax, loses his footing, and falls to the ground, lifeless. 

His own gun clatters a few feet away, near William’s feet. But he’s too shocked to really react. For a moment, they all just stand there, taking it in gradually. William is the first to make a noise, a strange wheezing sound in the back of his throat, hunching over like he may vomit, “What the fuck, what the fuck!” He keeps repeating. 

Jonah stares. Rench’s face isn’t really a face anymore, his cheek has dissolved in on itself, bullet exited through the back of his skull. Blood spreads, an inky color in the dark night. Jax blinks several times, broken from a trance, breathing in shakily and scrambling away as fast as possible. 

Attention shifts onto Rob - Rob, brown-eyed, nice smile, warm jacket Rob - a gun of his own in his left hand, still aimed as if he’s ready to fire again, the sound is still reverberating off the empty bridge and water below. Nobody knows where he even got it, he’s never had one before, he’s always vehemently been against it. Looking at him now, he’s unrecognizable. 

Jonah loses the feeling in his legs. If it weren’t for Vito’s constricting grip on the crook his elbow, Jonah would’ve collapsed where he was. He curls into himself, gasping, Vito releases him out of worry, gathers his shoulders in his hands, rubbing soothing circles that Jonah barely feels. Together, the two of them sink onto the wet concrete. 

Blood pounds in his ears, his veins. His heart is soaring in his chest, desperate to break through his ribcage. And despite it all, he can’t breathe. His lungs tighten, close like a door slamming shut. He can’t take his eyes off of Rench’s limp body, who had once been moving and alive and talking, he’s dead. Just a second ago, just a split decision. 

Like Alex. Like his friend Reggie in the fifth grade. Like his dad. 

He can’t breathe. He can’t. 

Vito’s face comes in and out, his voice sounds far away, like Jonah’s submerged in water. A tremor takes to Jonah, his entire body won’t stop shaking, doubling over. He wants to throw up, reflexively almost, but he hadn’t eaten anything today out of worry for Vito’s sudden disappearance. 

“Jonah, baby,” Vito’s hands are on his face, tilting it towards him. In that moment, all Jonah can see are his brown eyes, “Look at me. It’s okay, baby. Breathe. Breathe with me.” He enunciates the rise and fall of his chest, coaxing Jonah to join him. And Jonah tries his hardest, there’s pain in his abdomen, “Calm down, it’s okay.” 

It takes a total of eight minutes to get Jonah to come down from it all. A few pumps of his inhaler - Jonah was surprised to see that Vito even carried it with him - Vito touching him as much as possible, speaking quietly between the two of them. Jonah’s eyesight is still blurry, but he can’t really tell if it’s from tears or lack of oxygen. 

“I’ve got you,” Vito is saying, “Breathe.”

Through the soothing sound of Vito’s voice, there’s others. William, Jonah realizes vaguely, is yelling again. Pointedly at Rob, jabbing a finger at him, Jax wobbly and unstable between them, trying to keep them from going at each other’s throats. Jonah can only watch, wheezing, clutching his inhaler like a lifeline. 

In his peripheral, past Vito’s shoulder, he can still see Rench’s body. 

“--stop, guys!” Jax is breathless from the entire thing, “Stop! William - c’mon, just--” 

“Are you fuckin’ stupid? You braindead? You tryin’ to get us all killed?” William is shouting at the top of his lungs, trying his best to get to Rob, “I’ll kill you my goddamn self--” 

“We gotta move him,” Rob’s voice is kind of dead sounding, numb. Like Jonah, he’s staring in Rench’s direction, he can’t look away, “We can’t leave him here.” 

Vito’s lips sneer up in the middle of a gentle whisper of Jonah’s name, he twists his head around to glare at Rob, “Can you shut the fuck up?” 

Rob blinks, like he’s just now noticing Vito and Jonah were still thee. He steps towards them, ignoring William. “Jonah,” Rob says, “Help me move him.” He’s staring right at Jonah, but not really. Through him, almost. He’s pale, there’s a shake in his hands, this is what “in shock” looks like. 

Vito stands before Jonah can even open his mouth and make sense of his friend’s words. He’s in Rob’s face before anyone can stop him, eyes deadly. The thing about Vito is, he doesn’t have to make threats like Rudy or Jacob to get his point across, everything about him says enough. Rob shuffles a step back, but doesn’t heed to the warning. 

“We need to move him,” He says again, restless, “Someone could’ve heard--” 

Vito sets his teeth, “Don’t touch him.”

“What--” 

“Don’t touch him,” Vito’s voice is final, steel, “You’ve done enough.” 

Jonah spaces out around that time. He keeps thinking of the moment the bullet hit Rench. He thinks of his dad, and his mom - what they’d both say if they could see him right now. To calm his breathing, he puts his head between his knees and counts until he gets to two - hundred. He can still hear them, arguing, going back and forth like this is something so trivial, something that happened every single day. 

Maybe it did. 

Jonah lifts his head a scant, swallowing, his eyes on Vito - who stood only a few inches away, refusing to leave Jonah’s side. But his attention was on Jax, Rob, and William, as they each grabbed a limb of Rench, hefting him from the ground with great difficulty. Repulsed, Jonah looks away, back to his boyfriend. 

He hadn’t even flinched at the gunshot. He didn’t look disturbed in the slightest. 

As if feeling his stare, Vito turns his head and gives Jonah a tight-lipped smile of reassurance. He crouches down to his side again, rubbing one hand at the top of his back gently, “Better?” 

Jonah shakes his head“Can we go home?” 

Vito helps Jonah from the ground, his expression is almost pained, and grows more severe when he meets eyes with Rob. By then, they’ve moved Rench’s body to Rob’s truck, throwing a spare tarp over it. William and Jax were going back and forth over where to dump it, but Jonah couldn’t hear much after that, because Vito helped him into the car and closed the door. The voices are muted, he can’t make out what they’re saying too much. 

Vito says something when he walks back over to them, his stance is aggressive and agitated, he’s patting at his pockets like he wants to grab his carton of cigarettes. And then he shoves his hands into his jeans, glowering. Jax is tentative to speak up, William cutting him off at every time he opens his mouth, and Rob is carefully smoothing down the edges of the tarp, methodical almost, barely sparing Vito a glance as he speaks. 

Rob talks. Vito does too. William looks annoyed. Jax is staring at the ground. Thanks to the headlights of Vito’s car, Jonah is able to make out each of their expressions - they look hollow. Whatever agreement they come to, Rob is dissatisfied with it, but he shuts up with one look from Vito. 

Jonah feels sick again. 

Vito gets into the car, settling into the driver seat familiarly. He finds his cigarettes finally, but doesn’t light one. He just looks at Jonah, who’s staring straight ahead, not really seeing anything, but still there, “Hey.” 

Jonah turns his head to look at him. 

“I’m gonna take care of this, alright?” He reaches over and takes Jonah’s hand, his fingers feel numb and he realizes he’s still grasping at the inhaler as tight as ever, “Nothing’s going to happen.” 

Jonah wonders what that means. There’s always consequences when it comes to death, especially in this line of business. What about Veronica, what about Tripp? What about Mr. A? Theo, Nico - how could Jonah look them in the face anymore? 

Rob’s truck starts up, tail - lights flickering. 

Vito’s face is grim, voice tight, “Let’s go home.” 

.

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#writings #vionah #violence / #death / #pda / #blood / #gun mention /