#And DONT get me started on 1930s alright | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

thestuckylibrary · 6 years

Text

Group Ask 71

What is a group ask?

Previous Group Asks

AO3 Search Tutorial

Please send us an ask stating which group ask and which person you are replying to. Thank you so much in advance!

Anon 1 said:

Hiiii guys so I read a fic a while ago but seems like I can’t find it now so in this fic Bucky doesn’t remember anything and he has a new life where he lives a “normal” life and he kinda teaches to fight some people at a gym or something anyway the reason he doesnt remember anything cuz Steve asked SHIELD the wipe his memory without Bucky’s permission and at the end they got back together but Bucky is angry with Steve cuz he made him forgot everything etc. That’s all I can remember. Pls help :(

dolphinqueen10, orchidsrule, asterisktrash, and amethystkrystal sent in Through a dark night, without a sunrise, love will tell us where to go by LunaCanisLupus_22 (complete | 126,298 | E)

Anon 2 said:

Hey! I’m sorry, I tried looking for this fic myself but I couldn’t find anything. All I remember is I think it was pretty short but it was modern and Steve And Bucky had a kid and Bucky goes to the school to pick her up and he’s waiting with the parents and I think it’s nat and Clint they are like who is he? And are kinda suspicious and I remember they like asked their kid who it was when they came out and he was like oh that’s such and suches dad and that are like ?? No? Cause they have only seen Steve. Sorry I don’t have more! I just really wanted to read it again cause I remit beefing cute.

Anon sent in Who Is That? by Blackparade (oneshot | 1,179 | G)

Anon 3 said:

Help me, please? I've been looking for this fic for forever, and the only thing I can remember from it is this: Steve was yelling "you're a good friend Tony!" sincerely (At Tony, obvs) because he knew that that is the best way to make Tony uncomfortable? (In a teasing way, not an asshole way) also, I'm pretty sure it wasn't a short fic (90% sure it was more than 50k) and I read it on ao3 (thats for sure) This is such a good blog, thank you for helping everyone (even if you can't help me!) <3<3

Anon 4 said:

There's these two fics I keep thinking of but can't remember enough to find.1. Has Steve and Bucky discovering a porno or adult film of them and before it gets to adult part they praise the sheets and food for being authentic to the time.2. Has a segment with all three Barnes sisters that ends with all three saying I was Steve and Bucky's favorite.

hpikachu2003 sent in My Stevie by biblionerd07 (oneshot | 1,669 | G)

Anon 5 said:

I have searched everywhere for this fic for my friend to read and cannot find it. It is essentially pre wwii Steve watches Bucky and a girl from the closet, and touches himself while he watches. Bucky catches him after and they have sex. Know it?

Anon sent in Filthy Words by vassalady (oneshot | 1,178 | E) - bucky/omc

starfire-feelstheaster said:

Alright.... I looked everywhere and I still can't find this fic. I'm looking for a fic that is about Bucky and Steve from the 1930s/40s where Bucky keeps taking Steve on double dates and then either purposely or accidentally ruins the date so that their dates would ditch them and then it'd just be Steve and Bucky on the date. Any ideas???

irismustang said:

I tried a few keywords and AO3 and I am either missing it, or doing the wrong words. I am searching for a Captain America Steve/Modern Bucky fic. Bucky's family owns a furniture or antiques shop. Steve comes in. They start a relationship but Steve dumps him after Bucky's attacked as a way to get to Captain America through someone he cares about. I feel like it had a Notting Hill aspect too, with how Steve comes back to have their happy ending.

whitewolfbucky and dolphinqueen10 sent in This Side by brideofquiet (complete | 35,321 | T) - AO3 restricted

foreversheepless said:

Hello! Do you know fanfic where Steve and Bucky somehow end up in an alternate dimension and when tony and the others bring them back, Steve and Bucky dont have any memories and act like cavemen? I seem to remember they didn’t know who they were and a lot of time had passed in the alternate dimension but not In the real world. You guys go amazing work! I’m sorry to ask this but I’ve searched ao3 and your blog and I just couldn’t seem to find the fic.

kittybrownjs, hateconqsall, and Anon sent in Every Tree That is Pleasant by spitandvinegar (oneshot | 13,525 | T) - AO3 restricted

agentseventyfive said:

Thank you for this library resource. I once read an amazing scene in which Bucky has collapsed in shower under freezing water and Steve climbs in with him fully clothed & turns up water heat. Bucky slowly comes round & realises Steve in Cap suit and how uncomfortable the material is against his naked back. Steve greets him with affection and they stay there until Bucky able to get up. I can't recall what story it was in in order to search on AO3. Is it familiar to anyone?

Anon sent in Fan the Flame by Avaaricious (WIP | 239,035 | M)

deusafeminista said:

Hi, I would like to know if you guys know a fanfic where Bucky is probably disabled or something, and then he gets paired with Steve as Captain America because of a websure. I remember that in the website Bucky had more compatibility with Brock, but then Steve discovers that is wrong. Also Bucky cooks!!!

Anon wrote in with Heart of Fools by Claudia_flies (complete | 55,824 | E)

#group asks

44 notes · View notes

missytalks-blog · 5 years

Text

Im just here to talk

Hi there,

I have been battling my fears lately and that is being alone in another country. Feeling helpless and paranoid that I am not welcome in this country at the moment. I left my country to find a better life for my family. I want to help them. We are not piss poor. We are not struggling. Let’s just say we’re average. My parents working til they’re 60 and still working until now, no savings because they used everything to help me and my sister. Living on pay check by pay check and wishing everyday that they get the chance of a promotion. I see my mother’s face getting defeated and exhausted everyday, fearing that money will run out soon.

I worked my ass off to graduate on a course I didn’t want to do. I chose it because I want to see happiness in my mother’s face. That someone was actually taking some responsibility to help the family. Well i thought it would be easy but i thought wrong. Going abroad is difficult. This is my first time away from home for a very long time. And yet everyday it has been a struggle. most days it has been chaos. If not chaos in reality, it’s chaos in my head. I am battling my own mind and this is because I care too much. I care about my family relying on me, I care about not offending anyone and just try to help out everyone.

I don’t know if I care too much that I forget myself but it feels like it is not enough. I dont want to change though. Thats me. I care a lot whether tell myself not to care, Ill still care.

Currently it is work that’s defeating me. I love my job. I enjoy caring for people. But no matter what I do to just be cool and try to stretch my patience, some things that I cant control defeats me.

The worse happened the other night, I had to deal with a co-worker that does not want to be told off. We are currently short of staff, and we had to do 12hr shifts. We had to arrange a roster with the boss, me and this certain co-worker present at the meeting. A roster had been done and both me and the co-worker agreed to it.

Thursday came. We were supposed to do 12hr shifts. This certain co-worker was supposed to come in at 1900. Was a busy day. Beaten and exhausted at 1900, I thought I was already able to eat dinner and go home as I was hungry. 1930, no one came to work. Called my boss, no one answered, called the co-worker on both her numbers, was just busy beeps. I panicked thinking I was gonna do 24hr shifts now without anyone telling me. I called the boss again to arrange for someone to come in the morning as I cant really do the morning shift still after doing 24hrs. Sorted. 8pm still no sign of anyone coming to work. I was already late for the medication rounds so just went on with work again. No food since 11am. Trying my best to concentrate with my tummy rumbling, in the cold, I did work slowly but surely as I did not want to make any mistakes. Was a relief when this co-worker turned up at 11pm. Apparently she forgot that she was supposed to come in on a night shift.

She had this no worries smile on her face like it was alright to forget things. It did not bother me, but when I started suggesting she call if she’s not sure of the shift because we did agree to the roster and she was physically present when we both agreed to the roster. she even photocopied it. I did also mention that she also has the responsibility of checking the roster ahead of time. She started shouting at me..being tired and all, I also fought back and told her ‘really? you’re the one who is mad at me?’ but she kept shouting at me to leave and threatened that she will drag me out of the facility. I stood there just looking at her and nodding my head off thinking there is no talking to this woman. I did not have time for that and just left because I thought it was unprofessional to fight back and I thought turning my back to someone who is too much is better than provoking the situation. She told me to go home she didn’t want handover, you can’t really force someone if they don’t want it. So I left.

Clearly I wasn’t meaning to tell her off, I was suggesting but maybe guessing by the way my face showed tiredness, probably she took it the wrong way. I meant to suggest, but she took it the wrong way and started shouting at me. Probably because we were both tired. I was just confirming if it wont happen again as we are doing this roster for the next 3 weeks. But I chose to walk away from a situation that I had no control over. It was her choice to shout at me and I had no control over that. I chose to walk away because that was the only way I can control myself. My reaction is my choice. Turning away is not a sign of weakness but of strength. Shouting is not a sign of strength either, so I chose to be quiet.

I felt mad that she shouted at me, I was shaking and I cried a little as I cry a lot on situations. I cry when im happy, I cry a lot when im super happy. I cry when I miss my mom. Yeah, I am a cry baby. Because that’s the only way I can show my genuine emotions. Not with talking or with actions. I cry and im still crying until now. after two days, I cant contain and stop myself from crying. I try my best to watch something funny but when everything turns quiet, everything hurts again. I feel very very very defeated now, even though I try to put a smile on my face every time. I could not eat. I tried but my tummy is refusing it. I stay in bed most of the time trying to look for comfort. I tried talking to my partner but I know when its too much for him or if he is not interested. So I stopped.

To be honest those suicide/depression hotlines are not good help either. I tried to text them because I dont like talking when im angry or crying or super down. Everything is all in my head and I prefer to type. The lady replying to my messages was not helpful, their replies were sort of questioning you if you are really in a crisis or not. I know when I call, I fear being recorded like those I watch on TV. I wanted to call but recording me invades my privacy. I know they want to help, but sometimes being recorded is not what I consent to.

But im writing this because I am currently in a crisis. My only comfort now is watching Jeffree Star be successful on youtube and surviving his past self. I find him funny and puts a smile on my face. I know it is super low and weird, I have never watched him before until now. and im hoping my happiness doesn’t end. But i know when it does, I dont know if I can handle it anymore.

I am turning 31 on monday and this isn’t how I envisioned my birthday to be like but now I feel like I don’t deserve to be happy and i’m treating my birthday as an ordinary day. I feel like happiness is not a part of my life. I keep chasing it but somehow the darkness and sadness chases after me and takes up a part of me. It will swallow me whole soon, and I dont know if I can bounce back. I dont have strength, I dont have anything anymore.

I want my mama.

If you’re reading this, please dont try to help me. Because all I can think about now is being a burden to someone else. I dont wanna be a burden. Id rather put myself away than be a burden to anyone else.

#sadness #talking #canwetalk

1 note · View note