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minnesotanaccent · 4 years

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hey, if you're in the mood i would love to hear about any paranormal investigations (whether serious or not) you've done! thanks, and hope you have a lovely day!

Oh anon thank you for asking! I’ll start by letting you in on my personal encounters with the paranormal-

BIGFOOT

I had an incredible encounter with him at Girl Scout camp. In the woods of camp lakamaga in Minnesota, I was about 16 years old. I volunteered to go grab some supplies from the dining hall and bring them back to our camp ground, there is a small path connecting the two sides of the camp (the day camp, and the overnight camp) and I was walking on the bath between thick trees and shrubbery when in the distance in another patch of trees I saw a humanoid figure, he was tall and all black, and he moved swiftly. He was gone in an instant, and I honestly thought I had imagined it. But later that evening we pitched our tent and went to sleep, I, being a dumbass; left my backpack outside the tent. It rained that night so I expected to see my backpack right outside the tent where I left it, but soaking wet. Well it was wet. But it was also about 15 ft away from the tent next to a tree, and it was open, with everything strewn about and even some things ripped and destroyed. People told me it was a raccoon... but anon if you saw the damage... no raccoon is capable of such a thing. And no one saw the raccoon. And we all heard a strange noise that night. So it definitely was NOT a raccoon. It was that jackass Bigfoot.

UFO

Another time at Girl Scout camp, the previous year. It was getting late and about the time when we would all be yelled at to go to bed. I was taking my sweet time getting into the tent, looking up at the stars as I am known to do. The sky at camp is always crystal clear, you can see planets, the ISS, and every constellation with incredible quality. All of the sudden I noticed something. Three lights, in the shape of a triangle, hovering in the sky, then moving faster than should be possible, in every direction and angle, never breaking their perfect formation. It could not have been a plane or any Star... it moved in such a way that was certainly extraterrestrial.

ABDUCTION

We all know aliens have been abducting and probing people for years, and it has happened to more people than you think. For approximately a year and a half every night I would wake up with cold sweats, and look at my arms and legs, and see small interesting bruises. Bruises that didn’t hurt, and I know I didn’t give them to myself, tiny and perfectly circular, and in neat little areas in neat little patterns. I have attached images (not of my own bruises, but pictures online from people who experienced the same) of what they look like. The reason I have no images of my own is that I planned on taking pictures the next morning, but when I woke up after that, no bruises. And I’ve never gotten one since. That was probably 9 months ago. So ever since I figured them out, they won’t come back. I am currently trying to figure out how I can entice the aliens to visit me again, I know it’s strange and people generally don’t want to be probed or abducted, but I do.

GHOSTS

My house is haunted. I have lived in it for 15 years. We bought it from the wife of the man who built it. His name was Walter. He died in my basement. Once when I was about 9, I watched the light in my bedroom turn on and off. Literally the light switch MOVED up and down. There was no one in the room. Once later I was eating a pudding cup when all of the sudden the pudding cup flew clear off the counter and onto the floor. Many times have doors randomly locked, and unlocked, even manual “hook” locks that are incapable of locking themselves. Everyone knows Walter still lives here, and my whole family talks to him and tries to be friendly. I have also been visited by ghosts of departed family members. I used to have trouble sleeping as a child because I was constantly visited by the ghost of my great aunt. I have also had experiences with demons and other such angry spirits, who tried to influence me in bad ways as a child.

THINGS I AM PERSUING NOW

Now that I live in Chicago part of the year for school, there are many opportunities to investigate paranormal happenings. Chicago is quite haunted for example and there are MANY haunted spots right near my college for instance. There is also the mystery of the Lake Michigan Monster, who me and my friend Jenn have had difficultly finding info about, but I do believe she exists. Aliens as well have a presence here, take for example the 2006 Ohare International Airport UFO sighting! Dozens of people all saw an alien craft park at Ohare and it is still being left unexplained. And one of the top UFO libraries exists in Chicago. I have contacted them and asked to browse their collection, but they do not allow students or amateurs at this time, only professionals. And I have, with the help of my dear friends, started the club at my school: The Truth Is Out There @ Saic! A club for students of my school who are like me and want to discover the truth and share their findings on the paranormal and to cultivate a safe place for believers ! I hope that even with social distancing and such in place we can still have an eventful year discussing and exploring the paranormal side of Chicago.

Thank you so so so much for asking, anon!!! I get so excited to talk about this stuff! I’m always open to talking aliens, cryptids, conspiracies, ghosts, and the unexplained! I also have plenty of weird theories and anecdotes, and my mom is even helping me plan a trip to Roswell New Mexico next summer!

#im gonna make a tag for all this and related stuff so if i decide to blog more about it ill have a tag

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caveatauditor · 4 years

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Ranking Jandek albums

Yesterday I posted a Jandek playlist; here are my favorite albums. Only strict favorites allowed--only those I would recommend to a skeptic--or else it would never stop. I’ve heard nothing after 1994′s Glad to Get Away, which Seth Tisue says is the last good one. Someone should report back to me on The Song of Morgan and its nine nocturnes.

The relative accessibility of Blue Corpse and You Walk Alone makes them no less weird and no less Jandek--it just makes them crisper realizations of Jandek’s peculiar sensibility. If other people are indeed responsible for much of the music on those albums, this too is appropriate, since one reason Jandek fascinates is for leaving intention and provenance a mystery: for the unsettling realization that the authorial hand is absent, and the delight when a new, dynamic interpretive space emerges.

1. Blue Corpse (1987)

Chilly and tremulous, a return to acoustic misery after a number of electric revels, Blue Corpse is a cleansing gesture as shattered and total as David Bowie’s Low. For years Jandek could cough into a microphone and sound like the weirdest musician alive; here he’s writing fractured love songs, which is even weirder. A departed object of desire haunts him. On side two, he performs a spectacular emotional exorcism, with “Harmonica” (compare Bowie’s “Warszawa”) and the expiatory “Only Lover” in which he furiously licks himself clean, trying to scrub the blush from his cheek and the lipstick stains from his guitar.

2. Telegraph Melts (1986)

I’m not comfortable living on the same planet as the man who recorded “Mother’s Day Card”.

3. Modern Dances (1987)

The sequel to Telegraph Melts, in which an electric noize band romps through a rotting basement, attacking furniture. You can smell the mold, hear the dripping pipes, see the unconscious bassist in the back corner, face down in a pool of blood, slowly dying. Jandek barks sadistic commands through a megaphone (“Twelve Seconds Since February 32nd”), while sparring partner Nancy responds in a flat, talky drawl that combines rock wail and church intonation (“Hand for Harry Idle”). The screeching dissonances and random tempo changes move with gangly discombobulation; as my friend Kevin Bozelka put it, this is music for and perhaps by people who are uncomfortable with their bodies. But the resulting clonk is so clumsy it’s funny, capturing an absurd and delightful spirit of play.

4. You Walk Alone (1988)

Quite randomly, he developed a gift for melody. Jandek and a second guitarist who may or may not also be Jandek embark on long guitar benders in a weirdly tuned major-key mode, so that the emotion repressed on Blue Corpse just pours from this one, like a good cry after bottling everything up for a while. The electric crackle hisses and bleeds melancholy. Nearly every song reprises lyrics from earlier songs with so much more sadness and frustration and terrible beauty, although the effect is disorienting too, since the fragmented, sample-like nature of the repetition undercuts the illusion of expressionism. Did he always feel this way? Does he even really now?

5. Later On (1981)

With his third album, he realized legible absurdity is even scarier than incoherence. His guitar is not out of tune; it’s just tuned to an atonal chord. Is “Your Condition” addressed to someone dead of a heart attack, or someone in love?

6. Chair Beside a Window (1982)

A collection of acoustic blues sketches with zero blues chords--just the thing! Jandek’s atonality reminds me of Sonic Youth’s guitar tunings insofar as both refract tired genres through skewed harmony and make them feel new again, whether rock or acoustic blues. Stark and ugly, quiet and static, early Jandek can sound almost shockingly empty. But the lyrics compute, the chords click despite dissonance, the aesthetic seems too distinct and too austere to have been settled on by accident, and the more I listen the more I wonder why this music, which is in fact extremely mannered, so succeeds at simulating primitivism. It’s not like all music would sound like Chair Beside a Window if stripped down--this album sounds like no music ever save Jandek’s own--but somehow, it creates that impression. Generic singer-songwriter misery sounds like Elliott Smith or Sufjan Stevens; it doesn’t sound like this.

7. Follow Your Footsteps (1986)

Between his two loudest efforts he released this quiet, lovely pastoral daydream, in which he blisses out and stares at the wind rippling through wheat fields. “Jaws of Murmur” would fit nicely on the Feelies’ The Good Earth, released the same year.

8. On the Way (1988)

Side one is almost too rock-conventional--Jandek plays straight blues chords, puffs on the harmonica as if covering “Midnight Rambler”, and sings vaguely Dylanesque narrative verses. The gorgeous acoustic makeout music on side two aches and sweats and bursts into flame.

#jandek #corwood

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